for one, contact all his mutual friends and explain the situation to him; and the ones who are mad at him. a sorry will never be enough for your actions, but show that you at least care. tell him that your actions would never be forgiven, and you know a simple “sorry” can’t get you guys back together, but even though “sorry” isn’t enough, let him know you are. and see where it goes :)
Dont even consider bringing up getting back together... why would you do that? Just apologize and let everyone know that you make a mistake. Then, the mention of getting back together would just be more painful for everyone. Why would you even suggest that?
@@evanmorrison3232 exactly why would you mentioned getting back together? That’s just seems a little sideways he apologized and you let everybody else know like they already said they were going to do what happened and you tell them all that you said sorry to him and that’s all you can do if there’s any other way to make up for what you did, you’re willing to do it. But definitely don’t know why the OP would suggest talking about getting back together.
Whenever I put something in my drawer I always check the crack at the back and even in other drawers and places I didnt put it in just in case, and if I cant find it, THEN I blame someone. I personally know what it is like to be blamed for stealing money and its very embarrassing, humbling and hurtful. But I'm glad she's having the courage and heart to apologise. I never got that..
@ipblade that's why I was talking about myself not her. I didn't say "why didn't she check the crack" I said "I always check the crack" Because I know about it. And I even said I'm happy she's apologising cause not many people like owning up to their mistake
I search all the places I know I had it...and if I can't find it I ask my fiancee to help look...I don't jump to conclusions on who could have taken it...tho if something goes missing and you can't find it for months or you let his sister borrow it twenty minutes earlier but you search the house when she leaves looking for the thing she claimed would be on the bookshelf outside the rooms...then it's more likely she took it...
My own mother claimed I stole money from her because the thing she sended me to buy (i can't remember what) was a few NIS higher and threaten to take money from my piggy bank, I never stole from her and never asked for money, so it was hurtful, she never apologized
If he was the one who suspected her for false accusations and she would share the story , you would call him a## hole . But when the roles are changed, you would call her a big person. You are a great great great man😂😂😂
@@user-ju8yu4pi7e if he was the one that accused her, but he did the same thing and admitted his mistake he would also be a big person. make a comparison that actually makes sense
You can’t change what you’ve done, but you can always admit your faults. Hope the ex boyfriend was able to work things out with friends or at least have people know he didn’t steal.
@@Nightmare2.03 I agree, he shouldn’t forgive them. I said I hope things get worked out as in I hope people are able to realize OP was wrong and the ex doesn’t have to deal with that shit. I wouldn’t forgive my friends if they didn’t believe me over something that big.
@@siriusblack7864It factually isn't. Don't get me wrong. What she did is horrible and she should of trusted him but the fact is, some people would of pretended it never happened.
Everyone is acting like OP lied and ruined his life on purpose. They were incorrect. Not purposely deceitful. They learned the truth and let it be known to everyone. OP is not responsible for anyone who chose to stop speaking to the ex. Cutting out a friend is a personal choice. Unless OP gave the mutual friends ultimatums, it's not on them. Misunderstandings happen and lack of trust has an effect on relationships even if nobody has really done anything wrong. This is an example of that.
The story doesn’t mention that she says sorry, just that she is going to, that sounds a lot like many people I know in the current society, they say these things and many more and don’t make amends and they “just keep swimming” it’s mostly selfishness, fear of the unknown, and ego. Most likely she simply moved on because it doesn’t directly affect her, it’s much easier for women to do than men in the current climate.
Good on her for apologizing. But all of this could've been so easily avoided, she could've actually checked everywhere, every single place on the house, for the money, when he said he didn't have it. My god, people do really lack a brain sometimes!
She did say she dismantled the drawers completely, it's not something you find by checking once or twice. Does shit fall behind/under drawers yes. Does it happen often? Not to me, I have a million drawers and only once did something of value fall back there and fortunately I noticed it instantly and knew where to look. It could be the first time that happened to her, you expect to be dismantling your drawers, cabinets and bed every time you loose your keys before realising they were on the wrong side table? It's much more likely that either you misplace something or someone or something stole it. In this case she was sure she did not misplace it so the other option is that someone stole it. Was it rash to break up with him without destroying her furniture just in case? Yes. Do I understand how a suspicious mind works and how it might seem logical that someone might steal a large amount of money? Yes. I don't know about her upbringing, but I know some people who grew up with stealing siblings and parents that lead to them being paranoid about hiding their money and they were quick to turn on us if we visited them and anything went missing around that time even though they had just misplaced it. Don't know if she's similar but I can understand why she did what she did, not saying it was right. I sure as shit wouldn't tell all of our mutual friends about it unless it was thousands and I had proof.
@@aino565 Exactly. She should've just checked everywhere and done everything possible to check for the money. She could've saved her relationship and the entire social circle of her ex.
@@michaelrentz7361 Would you if the only circumstances you knew about pointed in his direction? Let's also keep in mind, we don't know how long this whole thing took to actually happen. Like, it could have been several hours or days of searching and fighting, and we don't know how the boyfriend reacted to all of this either. If he got defensive, that would look suspicious. Ultimately, yes, she was wrong and now she has some major things to explain and apologize for. But that doesn't mean this was anything more than a tragic mistake.
@NoahofWill except it didn't all that pointed out to him was that he was the only one in the house. The fact She didn't check the back of the drawer to see if it didn't fell there and goes straight to blaming shows a huge lack of trust and that she didn't make the effort to search properly before getting suspicions. also everyone gets defensive when accused of something especially if the accusation is big, false and comes from a person you love and trust so no there's nothing suspicious about that. If it was something obvious and/or a nothing burger then yes it would be suspicious but otherwise it's a normal reaction
@@NoahofWillyea no ruining a assumedly healthy relationship over less than a grand? I literally couldn’t imagine the money can be made back it’s just money.
@@NoahofWillthe girl has issues. The fact she didn't think she could have misplaced it just simply assumed he took it and then didn't believe him. He's better off out of there.
If she didn't trust his word then I think she probably wasn't going to be in that relationship for much longer. Whilst yes she admitted to her actions which is admirable, in a relationship there needs to be a high level of trust and if it isn't there then the relationship won't last.
Yeah like she didn't even TRY to look further before jumping to him. And obviously the "friends" didn't think much of him either if they ditched him that easily
The thing is, it sounds like she tried to cover all her bases in the initial search: she didn't know the crack existed, so she had no idea to check there, so all she had to rely on was who was home at the time the money went missing. If there's no evidence to any other conclusion, then coming to any other conclusion seems insane. Things aren't always as simple as "She didn't [immediately] trust his word." Sometimes, it's "she weighed every possibility she knew of and yet still made a horrible mistake."
@@NoahofWill He said that he didn't take the money. She should have taken his word for it and looked further. Instead she blamed him and told everyone. She did not trust him since she didn't bother to check further after he told her that he didn't steal the money. Also the first place everyone should check when losing something out of a drawer is behind it or check for any cracks, before jumping to people.
Good thing for the guy, immediately accusing your SO of stealing when you are in a 2 year relationship is a red flag If I was her I would tried to dismantle the drawer before doing a hard accusation
wouldn't the logical coarse of action be: Step 1. Look in drawer Step 2. Notice missing envelope Step 3. Shuffle through drawer wondering if it just shifted Step 4. Notice hole in drawer Step 5. Take drawer out to find money
she found the envelope because she took the drawer apart and found the hidden space, I don't think it would've been that easy to find. Knowing the future/the truth from the outside sure make it easy lmao
@@BigBearWeekfemales already played out the story in their heads. Replay it long enough it becomes fact. Hysteria is a female phenomenon. It’s the hormones man. But never ever blame it on the hormones in front of a woman. I bet she lost it during her time of the month. If the boyfriend was truly smart he should’ve said “Hey let’s find it together”..then asks where she put it last. He looks there. Inspects the drawer. Empty’s drawer. Removes drawer just case. Finds envelope of money. Looks at her in disbelief like you owe me big time. Then have the best night of their lives lol
I could never imagine blindly accusing my bf like that, he’d probably help me tear apart to place searching and I’d be more likely to assume I misplaced it. How do you have that little trust in your bf and to tell everyone and ruin his reputation off baseless assumptions and claims? That’s so effed…
She wasn't? She was going off the only evidence she had: missing money, boyfriend is the only one with access to the house, she didn't leave even the room with the money, it's not where she placed it, and she didn't even know the place where it ended up existed until she physically dismantled the chest of drawers. Keep in mind, we don't know how long the entire event took, could have taken hours, days, even up to a week, and we don't know how the boyfriend reacted (defensiveness would have been suspicious). We also don't know her history: if people she knows have stolen from her before. Sounds like an honest mistake and she's ready to try and do what she can to set things right. It's better than some people are willing to do.
@@NoahofWill No, I don’t get how you do that. Stuff falls behind drawers all the time, especially if they are relatively full. I don’t care what her history is, if anyone has stollen from her before. I’ve had my own mother steal from me and that says nothing about my bf. You don’t just get to excuse bad actions in life, especially with the fact she went throwing out accusations and ruined his friendships and reputation. If you do that, you should take the responsibility and ridicule instead of acting like others should be empathetic towards you. She hurt the one she was supposed to love for no reason, and regardless of circumstance to point a finger so easily makes me think it was a saving grace for her bf because I wouldn’t even tolerate a friend like that.
This has happened to me as a cashier. 40 missing from till. I got asked about it an freaked. When the morning shift came an knew the situation. She pulled the tray out of the till. There it was in the back.
Your actions weren’t justifiable at the time but I like that you’re holding yourself accountable and will be taking the necessary steps to give him his reputation back
I'd argue that they were. OP was under the impression that someone they trusted had stolen from them. Op went with logic over blind trust. From their perspective it seemed like the boyfriend stole and lied about it.Trust was broken and they made a choice. Eventually they learned that they were incorrect in their deduction. With that knowledge, they are taking responsibility.
@@potatopancake9138Except that’s where she was wrong. He genuinely didn’t steal and he was the one who definitely felt hurt. She THOUGHT that he stole and got hurt. Very big difference
@@Nightmare2.03What does her being wrong have to do with the fact that she came to the only logical conclusion she could have come to with the amount of information she had? He was the only one home and with a key, she didn't leave even so much as the room with the money, it wasn't anywhere she had left it (and instead went into a space she didn't even know existed). Yes, she THOUGHT he stole and was wrong. She THOUGHT that because of what was a logical, if incomplete, set of circumstances.
As someone who can forgive easily when the regret is sincere I hate situations like this. I had people in my life who literally abused me when I apologised for sth I did. I never hated apologising as I have no issues with being wrong, I'm a human of course I do mistakes, I hate how people react when I apologise.
I understand this. The only logical assumption was that someone took it, if there was no sign pf break in then it had to have been someome with access and he was the only one with access to it, sadly the relationship ended as a result and it became a bad situation for him
I think if you trust someone "they must have stolen [thing that's missing]" becomes an illogical conclusion. For better or for worse, that's what it means to trust a person; hopefully OOP will use this as a learning experience and be less likely to make a similar mistake again in the future.
No, if he says he didn't take it then the only logical explanation is that it is still in your home and you better keep searching until you find it. If she doesn't trust him, after being together two years, and he said he didn't take it then maybe they are better off not staying together.
@@hotbread1004 then I hate to have to be the one to break it to you, but at least in that one regard your mother was kinda toxic. Unless you had a habit of stealing things, that's a toxic behavior.
Man I like to think people have more trust, but it’s possible that he seemed to have good motivation for stealing. If both of them really needed the money and it went missing, that’d seem like a massive betrayal
I have NEVER suspected that my partner stole something from me if I couldn’t find it. She was in the wrong relationship anyways if she couldn’t trust him.
I had this happen to me once only it was a friend. I was hanging out at his place. A few hours after I left, he called demanding me to give him his money back. He told a few people I stole it. A few days later he found it. He called an apologized. I accepted but I cut him off after that. I just couldn't see him as a friend anymore.
Glad she mentioned about clearing his name. I been hit with stories like that about me, and not a single person making crap up had the class to admit to people they made the stuff up they had spread. People don't think twice about ruining people for no reason
its really not, it was an honest mistake. if he knew where she put the money, and he was the only person who had access to the house other than her it would be a reasonable assumption. You would probably think the same thing.
@@grim_reapepperthey were in a 2 year relationship. She was probably checked out of the relationship and just wanted a reason to break up without seeming like a bad person. Especially since she started dating within a month after the break up 😂
@@dimitriostsiampalis364shut up bro. Nobody asked for your damn opinion. She literally said she was going to apologize so why would she break up with him and apologize after she realized he didn't take it. Shut the hell up
At least this person understands that a sorry won't be enough. That they likely won't be forgiven. And even so, they are going to contact everyone they told and correct their previous statements. They are doing everything they can to correct the hurt they did and still understand it might never be enough. This is how to be a good person. Accept when you are wrong and do what you can't to fix your mistakes.
As you told everyone about this, your apology also needs to be public. Word spreads, so as well as telling others you must put this information up on social media for everyone to see. I hope he can forgive you, and that others will accept that he was innocent
😂 he dodged a bullet, she either had no valid reason to suspect him, or she was in a relationship with a very shady dude and probably shouldn't have been in the relationship any longer anyways.
But she explained why she thought he stole it? You know... He was the only one who knew where the money were and was the only other person with keys to her house (obv he still has the right to be super angry, I would be too no matter how valid the reason was, but she still had a valid enough reason)
@@Yellowbeing082 year relationship, I guess trust isn’t a thing anymore. I would’ve flipped my room upside down before suspecting my SO, that’s just sad.
@@senpai-lol4310 I honestly do not know my reaction, but even if I frenetically started searching something I might not find it for the panic, and I'm pretty much a, impulsive person, so remembering I had put it somewhere very well, I'd point my finger too. So Idk, still might be a trust issues problem even if I see it as an impulsive type
@@KSFerncrazy how it was still in the drawer. She just didn’t check good enough and didn’t bother asking for help finding it. She spent more time ruining his reputation then looking for the money
@@IronpathsCrazy how it was in a space she didn't know existed, and also crazy how NOWHERE in the post does it say how the search for the money went. It could have taken hours, days, even up to a week before she came to the conclusion she came to. The poster chose to focus on her mistake and trying to make up for it, going out of her way to post that the boyfriend was completely innocent, rather than elaborate on the whole process of searching for the money. Learn reading comprehension.
You can't undo the damage, but her contacting their mutual friends and him is the best she could do. I respect her integrity, I hope that he's doing better.
I know these stories are for teenagers but some are so silly and unrealistic. If you think your boyfriend is a thief after 2 years, this cannot be based on one incident. You probably already have doubts and are better off out, or you have poor mental health and need support. Here’s what would have realistically happened after a two year relationship… GF: I can’t find my cash, have you taken it? BF: no of course not. Have you looked properly? Take everything out the draw. *both proceed to take all out the draw and spot the hole* or *one thinks to take it apart because losing things down the back of fully working draws is very common* They find the money. End of situation.
Yea you can tell some people here have never lived in homes where the person you trusted most betrayed you. If she's experienced betrayal by someone she trusted, then its likely that she thought "oh i trusted him, but if i follow the logic with the information currently available, then it's entirely possible/likely that he stole from me. Because even people you trust can do bad things." There are better ways she could have handled it, absolutely. But she isnt a bad person for making this mistake, she just needs to calm down and think through all the options next time. Good on her for owning up to it and trying to undo what damage she can
Even if she apologizes which I think is right and nice of her to do, it wont change anything but make her have peace of mind for potential ruining someone’s friendship based on her overreaction. If the mutual friends decide to be his friend again, it wont fix/change the fact that in a tough scenario there mutual friends chose her side instead of trying to her the boyfriend out and maybe not playing sides as that what a proper friend should do.
Something got lost in a drawer and her first thought was to accuse her boyfriend of 2 years, not just pull out the drawers and check behind? She was looking for an excuse, horrible person. At least shes apologizing so hopefully he can get his friend back.
Poor guy. I had an ex accuse me if stealing from him once. Unfortunately he wasn't as classy as op, and when he figured out what happened to the money, he continued to let people think it was me rather than admit that he'd spent it while drunk and forgot.
It's over. Blaming and not trusting your partner makes relationship impossible. The damage is done and it's permanent, you cannot redeem yourself from this.
Tbh, if even after a 2 year relationship you couldn't believe him and had doubts regarding him, then you didn't deserve him although I'm glad you thought about apologizing instead of letting it be.
Honestly, good on both of them for breaking up, since there was intially no trust in the relationship. Hopefully, some of the damage done can be undone by talking to the mutual friends though
Thinking your SO stile from you is a perfectly good reason to want to break up. Obviously OP looked around and asked everyone before assuming it had to be the bf so it's not like she overreacted, she genuinely thought he stole her money. That said she was wrong and not only is she admitting it, but she's also apologizing to her ex and letting everyone else affected know. It might not fix everything, but it sure is more than many of us would care to admit
Bruh. It's one thing to accuse him of wrongdoing, but it's another for his mutual friend to simply accept that he had stolen it despite no evidence. If I'm the guy, I would not forgive all of them for accusing me without evidence and simply based it on the process of elimination that does not factor the possibility of a robber.
The rule of thumb is, defend him as loudly and as publicly as you attacked his character. Not that OP will get him back, but clearing his name in full is the right thing to do.
If you weren't able to trust the ex when they said that they didn't take it, enough to end the relationship, then there were issues already there that would have created problems further down the line. Hopefully the farce is enlightening on both ends on the matter of trustworthiness.
I mean, it’s a very touchy situation because the money seemed to have vanished. If no one else was there, where could it have been. Poor guy, reputation tainted and friends lost. If I were him, I’d be so upset. I probably wouldn’t want to forgive the people the doubted me right away. Even when I do forgive them, I may not want to be close with them. Maybe they called him a thief and other names… it could have been very traumatic for him.
I couldn't imagine thinking my long term boyfriend stole my money but if he was there all day alone then what else could it be. But if he had left at all during the day, then I would just have to go with someone broke in and stole it. Maybe I am naive
@@salahabdalla368 Personally, It would be one of the last things I think of. I would have thought about every other possibility and I have a horrible memory so misremembering is a big one for me. But who knows this man's character. Maybe it was not too far off to think that he stole it.
Sue for defamation. Woman doesn't make any effort to find it, so she accused him of stealing. She sounds crazy, she probably bad-mouthed him for the entire 3 months, to everyone that would listen to. Then finds it and is like oops
its good that you’re holding yourself accountable but i honestly hope he finds someone better bc what you did is genuinely awful, like you pretty much ruined this guys life for a misunderstanding, making him lose friends and turning people against him. i hope the best for him but you need to do a lot better next time and you should probably start using your brain a lot more often rather than acting upon your feelings
Take a feather pillow to the roof of the tallest building in your town on a windy day. For every person you told pull a handful of features from the pillow and throw them into the blowing wind . Wait the same amount of time from when you told the first person until you corrected the last. Then go and pick up every feature that you through into the wind. When you have picked up every feature then you can begin to ask him for forgiveness..
Thank god. That guy Dodged a Cannon. I am so Happy he managed to escape from a Relationship where his Partner doesnt even Trust him after being Together for 2 Years.
Also, learn how to search properly. We all have "lost" things, but turning the room upside down usually yields results. Good listen to learn before you go pointing fingers at people with good history and no motives like drug or gambling addiction
Good on her for at least apologizing. I couldn’t imagine how the ex felt
What do you mean good on her!
@@FreezingPoint32 Would you rather she not apologize and not clear up the situation?
@@Eros-9-7-22would you rather everyone just accused people when they can’t find something
Nope it's not about 800 r 1k it's about your trust. You don't and not to forget the insult.
@@pugtheviolist1865 When did I say she was right for doing that?
for one, contact all his mutual friends and explain the situation to him; and the ones who are mad at him. a sorry will never be enough for your actions, but show that you at least care. tell him that your actions would never be forgiven, and you know a simple “sorry” can’t get you guys back together, but even though “sorry” isn’t enough, let him know you are.
and see where it goes :)
Dont even consider bringing up getting back together... why would you do that? Just apologize and let everyone know that you make a mistake. Then, the mention of getting back together would just be more painful for everyone. Why would you even suggest that?
@@evanmorrison3232exactly
Yeah I wouldn’t think about getting back together, it’s more a matter of just trying to do right by the poor guy.
@@evanmorrison3232 exactly why would you mentioned getting back together? That’s just seems a little sideways he apologized and you let everybody else know like they already said they were going to do what happened and you tell them all that you said sorry to him and that’s all you can do if there’s any other way to make up for what you did, you’re willing to do it. But definitely don’t know why the OP would suggest talking about getting back together.
No way I’d get back together but It’d be hard to hate her if that’s what she did to fix it.
Whenever I put something in my drawer I always check the crack at the back and even in other drawers and places I didnt put it in just in case, and if I cant find it, THEN I blame someone. I personally know what it is like to be blamed for stealing money and its very embarrassing, humbling and hurtful.
But I'm glad she's having the courage and heart to apologise. I never got that..
She said that she didn't know about the crack. How is she supposed to search in it without the knowledge of its existence?
@ipblade that's why I was talking about myself not her. I didn't say "why didn't she check the crack" I said "I always check the crack" Because I know about it. And I even said I'm happy she's apologising cause not many people like owning up to their mistake
I search all the places I know I had it...and if I can't find it I ask my fiancee to help look...I don't jump to conclusions on who could have taken it...tho if something goes missing and you can't find it for months or you let his sister borrow it twenty minutes earlier but you search the house when she leaves looking for the thing she claimed would be on the bookshelf outside the rooms...then it's more likely she took it...
My own mother claimed I stole money from her because the thing she sended me to buy (i can't remember what) was a few NIS higher and threaten to take money from my piggy bank, I never stole from her and never asked for money, so it was hurtful, she never apologized
@@ipbladethat much money and you wouldn't take apart the chest just to check? Nah pos.
At least you're not sweeping the situation under the rug and admitting your mistake. Takes a big person!❤
If he was the one who suspected her for false accusations and she would share the story , you would call him a## hole . But when the roles are changed, you would call her a big person. You are a great great great man😂😂😂
@@user-ju8yu4pi7ethat's actually you, you're projecting your double standards
@@user-ju8yu4pi7e if he was the one that accused her, but he did the same thing and admitted his mistake he would also be a big person. make a comparison that actually makes sense
@@dyingofdioxide it might be that in your eyes but I have seen others who do things the other way
@@user-ju8yu4pi7e who is "you"?
You can’t change what you’ve done, but you can always admit your faults. Hope the ex boyfriend was able to work things out with friends or at least have people know he didn’t steal.
I agree, but no. I do not hope that he forgives his friends.
@@Nightmare2.03 I agree, he shouldn’t forgive them. I said I hope things get worked out as in I hope people are able to realize OP was wrong and the ex doesn’t have to deal with that shit. I wouldn’t forgive my friends if they didn’t believe me over something that big.
At least she’s trying to repair his reputation that she ruined.
That’s more than some.
No it's not
@siriusblack7864 at least she knows she's in the wrong unlike a lot of people when they are wrong
@@siriusblack7864It factually isn't. Don't get me wrong. What she did is horrible and she should of trusted him but the fact is, some people would of pretended it never happened.
@@nelsoncherrier3855Exactly... well said.
Everyone is acting like OP lied and ruined his life on purpose. They were incorrect. Not purposely deceitful. They learned the truth and let it be known to everyone. OP is not responsible for anyone who chose to stop speaking to the ex. Cutting out a friend is a personal choice. Unless OP gave the mutual friends ultimatums, it's not on them. Misunderstandings happen and lack of trust has an effect on relationships even if nobody has really done anything wrong. This is an example of that.
Good on her for saying sorry, i know so many people who wouldve just kept that to themselves and never tell anyone
Fr tho
It's bare minimum
The story doesn’t mention that she says sorry, just that she is going to, that sounds a lot like many people I know in the current society, they say these things and many more and don’t make amends and they “just keep swimming” it’s mostly selfishness, fear of the unknown, and ego. Most likely she simply moved on because it doesn’t directly affect her, it’s much easier for women to do than men in the current climate.
Good on her for apologizing. But all of this could've been so easily avoided, she could've actually checked everywhere, every single place on the house, for the money, when he said he didn't have it. My god, people do really lack a brain sometimes!
She did say she dismantled the drawers completely, it's not something you find by checking once or twice. Does shit fall behind/under drawers yes. Does it happen often? Not to me, I have a million drawers and only once did something of value fall back there and fortunately I noticed it instantly and knew where to look. It could be the first time that happened to her, you expect to be dismantling your drawers, cabinets and bed every time you loose your keys before realising they were on the wrong side table? It's much more likely that either you misplace something or someone or something stole it. In this case she was sure she did not misplace it so the other option is that someone stole it. Was it rash to break up with him without destroying her furniture just in case? Yes. Do I understand how a suspicious mind works and how it might seem logical that someone might steal a large amount of money? Yes. I don't know about her upbringing, but I know some people who grew up with stealing siblings and parents that lead to them being paranoid about hiding their money and they were quick to turn on us if we visited them and anything went missing around that time even though they had just misplaced it. Don't know if she's similar but I can understand why she did what she did, not saying it was right. I sure as shit wouldn't tell all of our mutual friends about it unless it was thousands and I had proof.
@@aino565 Exactly. She should've just checked everywhere and done everything possible to check for the money. She could've saved her relationship and the entire social circle of her ex.
She ruined the guys reputation and had people turn on him. She put more effort in screwing him over than actually looking for the money.
@@ihavenonameforyou1 That's exactly what i said
The last comment applies to you as well. Do you actually think that she wouldn't have searched her house at all after losing 846 dollars?
Guy dodged a bullet.
Probably. They’re in a multiple years long relationship and she couldn’t trust him? That’s pretty wild
@@michaelrentz7361 Would you if the only circumstances you knew about pointed in his direction? Let's also keep in mind, we don't know how long this whole thing took to actually happen. Like, it could have been several hours or days of searching and fighting, and we don't know how the boyfriend reacted to all of this either. If he got defensive, that would look suspicious.
Ultimately, yes, she was wrong and now she has some major things to explain and apologize for. But that doesn't mean this was anything more than a tragic mistake.
@NoahofWill except it didn't all that pointed out to him was that he was the only one in the house. The fact She didn't check the back of the drawer to see if it didn't fell there and goes straight to blaming shows a huge lack of trust and that she didn't make the effort to search properly before getting suspicions. also everyone gets defensive when accused of something especially if the accusation is big, false and comes from a person you love and trust so no there's nothing suspicious about that. If it was something obvious and/or a nothing burger then yes it would be suspicious but otherwise it's a normal reaction
@@NoahofWillyea no ruining a assumedly healthy relationship over less than a grand? I literally couldn’t imagine the money can be made back it’s just money.
@@NoahofWillthe girl has issues. The fact she didn't think she could have misplaced it just simply assumed he took it and then didn't believe him. He's better off out of there.
If she didn't trust his word then I think she probably wasn't going to be in that relationship for much longer. Whilst yes she admitted to her actions which is admirable, in a relationship there needs to be a high level of trust and if it isn't there then the relationship won't last.
Yeah like she didn't even TRY to look further before jumping to him. And obviously the "friends" didn't think much of him either if they ditched him that easily
The thing is, it sounds like she tried to cover all her bases in the initial search: she didn't know the crack existed, so she had no idea to check there, so all she had to rely on was who was home at the time the money went missing. If there's no evidence to any other conclusion, then coming to any other conclusion seems insane.
Things aren't always as simple as "She didn't [immediately] trust his word." Sometimes, it's "she weighed every possibility she knew of and yet still made a horrible mistake."
@@NoahofWill He said that he didn't take the money. She should have taken his word for it and looked further. Instead she blamed him and told everyone. She did not trust him since she didn't bother to check further after he told her that he didn't steal the money. Also the first place everyone should check when losing something out of a drawer is behind it or check for any cracks, before jumping to people.
Good thing for the guy, immediately accusing your SO of stealing when you are in a 2 year relationship is a red flag
If I was her I would tried to dismantle the drawer before doing a hard accusation
Definitely a red flag. Their relationship must’ve already had some deeper issues going on before the money went missing.
I mean my friends went through relationships where one partner lent money to the other partner all the time and never got it back.
I probably would have asked if they took it or moved it and then asked them to help me find it
A good escape for ex boyfriend. Nothing more painful than not being trusted.
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@@Mango--Mochi?!
Agreed
wouldn't the logical coarse of action be:
Step 1. Look in drawer
Step 2. Notice missing envelope
Step 3. Shuffle through drawer wondering if it just shifted
Step 4. Notice hole in drawer
Step 5. Take drawer out to find money
She said she only found it after taking the whole thing apart. Just shuffling around wouldn't have accomplished anything.
she found the envelope because she took the drawer apart and found the hidden space, I don't think it would've been that easy to find. Knowing the future/the truth from the outside sure make it easy lmao
That only applies to the male experience, female experience is a different order of operation
@@BigBearWeekfemales already played out the story in their heads. Replay it long enough it becomes fact. Hysteria is a female phenomenon. It’s the hormones man. But never ever blame it on the hormones in front of a woman. I bet she lost it during her time of the month.
If the boyfriend was truly smart he should’ve said “Hey let’s find it together”..then asks where she put it last.
He looks there.
Inspects the drawer.
Empty’s drawer.
Removes drawer just case.
Finds envelope of money.
Looks at her in disbelief like you owe me big time.
Then have the best night of their lives lol
Even if she didn't found the envelope, she would have found the hole in the back. The rest is rather easy to figure out, I think
"wow, i messed up" is an understatement
The understatement of the year.
What should she say then?
@@stephaniew1707 wow, i fucked up big time
@@Dynamite_TNT definitely
@@Dynamite_TNT I'd even say huge or massive time, maybe even *really* fucked up
I could never imagine blindly accusing my bf like that, he’d probably help me tear apart to place searching and I’d be more likely to assume I misplaced it. How do you have that little trust in your bf and to tell everyone and ruin his reputation off baseless assumptions and claims? That’s so effed…
Exactly. I would tell him i lost my money and we'd search together
Especially since they've been together for 2 years!
She wasn't? She was going off the only evidence she had: missing money, boyfriend is the only one with access to the house, she didn't leave even the room with the money, it's not where she placed it, and she didn't even know the place where it ended up existed until she physically dismantled the chest of drawers. Keep in mind, we don't know how long the entire event took, could have taken hours, days, even up to a week, and we don't know how the boyfriend reacted (defensiveness would have been suspicious). We also don't know her history: if people she knows have stolen from her before.
Sounds like an honest mistake and she's ready to try and do what she can to set things right. It's better than some people are willing to do.
@@NoahofWill No, I don’t get how you do that. Stuff falls behind drawers all the time, especially if they are relatively full. I don’t care what her history is, if anyone has stollen from her before. I’ve had my own mother steal from me and that says nothing about my bf. You don’t just get to excuse bad actions in life, especially with the fact she went throwing out accusations and ruined his friendships and reputation. If you do that, you should take the responsibility and ridicule instead of acting like others should be empathetic towards you. She hurt the one she was supposed to love for no reason, and regardless of circumstance to point a finger so easily makes me think it was a saving grace for her bf because I wouldn’t even tolerate a friend like that.
Damn, the accountability is refreshing, good on you, you live and you learn.
This has happened to me as a cashier. 40 missing from till. I got asked about it an freaked. When the morning shift came an knew the situation. She pulled the tray out of the till. There it was in the back.
Haha I hear ya! Starbucks accused me of stealing $50. Then, they checked the drop box for large bills and there it was.
Your actions weren’t justifiable at the time but I like that you’re holding yourself accountable and will be taking the necessary steps to give him his reputation back
I'd argue that they were. OP was under the impression that someone they trusted had stolen from them. Op went with logic over blind trust. From their perspective it seemed like the boyfriend stole and lied about it.Trust was broken and they made a choice. Eventually they learned that they were incorrect in their deduction. With that knowledge, they are taking responsibility.
@@potatopancake9138Except that’s where she was wrong. He genuinely didn’t steal and he was the one who definitely felt hurt. She THOUGHT that he stole and got hurt. Very big difference
@@Nightmare2.03What does her being wrong have to do with the fact that she came to the only logical conclusion she could have come to with the amount of information she had? He was the only one home and with a key, she didn't leave even so much as the room with the money, it wasn't anywhere she had left it (and instead went into a space she didn't even know existed). Yes, she THOUGHT he stole and was wrong. She THOUGHT that because of what was a logical, if incomplete, set of circumstances.
I'm glad you have the integrity to right your wrong....
It's humbling yeah, but worth it...❤
She is self aware and willing to redeem her actions in some capacity which is more than any of my exes ever did so that is refreshing
Honestly if you guys dont trust each other in situations like that then its probably better for you guys to stay broken up.
As someone who can forgive easily when the regret is sincere I hate situations like this. I had people in my life who literally abused me when I apologised for sth I did. I never hated apologising as I have no issues with being wrong, I'm a human of course I do mistakes, I hate how people react when I apologise.
I understand this. The only logical assumption was that someone took it, if there was no sign pf break in then it had to have been someome with access and he was the only one with access to it, sadly the relationship ended as a result and it became a bad situation for him
I think if you trust someone "they must have stolen [thing that's missing]" becomes an illogical conclusion. For better or for worse, that's what it means to trust a person; hopefully OOP will use this as a learning experience and be less likely to make a similar mistake again in the future.
@@Trevor21230 yes hopefully but my own mother accused me of stealing multiple things so really who knows
No, if he says he didn't take it then the only logical explanation is that it is still in your home and you better keep searching until you find it.
If she doesn't trust him, after being together two years, and he said he didn't take it then maybe they are better off not staying together.
@@catherinekilgour2563he dodged a bullet
@@hotbread1004 then I hate to have to be the one to break it to you, but at least in that one regard your mother was kinda toxic. Unless you had a habit of stealing things, that's a toxic behavior.
Man I like to think people have more trust, but it’s possible that he seemed to have good motivation for stealing. If both of them really needed the money and it went missing, that’d seem like a massive betrayal
I have NEVER suspected that my partner stole something from me if I couldn’t find it. She was in the wrong relationship anyways if she couldn’t trust him.
Yea but not all partners are trustful I am not Saying that she isn't in the wrong but at least she knows she's in the wrong
I had this happen to me once only it was a friend. I was hanging out at his place. A few hours after I left, he called demanding me to give him his money back. He told a few people I stole it. A few days later he found it. He called an apologized. I accepted but I cut him off after that. I just couldn't see him as a friend anymore.
Glad she mentioned about clearing his name. I been hit with stories like that about me, and not a single person making crap up had the class to admit to people they made the stuff up they had spread. People don't think twice about ruining people for no reason
That’s terrible. I mean she was going off very flimsy evidence
its really not, it was an honest mistake. if he knew where she put the money, and he was the only person who had access to the house other than her it would be a reasonable assumption. You would probably think the same thing.
@@riskyraccon6475no dumbass I would think oh it must be around here somewhere still and fallen somewhere
@@riskyraccon6475 i agree, if hes the only other person with a key and there isnt any cameras, then its not flimsy evidence
@@grim_reapepperthey were in a 2 year relationship.
She was probably checked out of the relationship and just wanted a reason to break up without seeming like a bad person. Especially since she started dating within a month after the break up 😂
@@dimitriostsiampalis364shut up bro. Nobody asked for your damn opinion. She literally said she was going to apologize so why would she break up with him and apologize after she realized he didn't take it. Shut the hell up
I'm glad for her having the guts to apologize
Fr
At least this person understands that a sorry won't be enough. That they likely won't be forgiven. And even so, they are going to contact everyone they told and correct their previous statements. They are doing everything they can to correct the hurt they did and still understand it might never be enough. This is how to be a good person. Accept when you are wrong and do what you can't to fix your mistakes.
As you told everyone about this, your apology also needs to be public. Word spreads, so as well as telling others you must put this information up on social media for everyone to see.
I hope he can forgive you, and that others will accept that he was innocent
I love watching these vid
😂 he dodged a bullet, she either had no valid reason to suspect him, or she was in a relationship with a very shady dude and probably shouldn't have been in the relationship any longer anyways.
But she explained why she thought he stole it? You know... He was the only one who knew where the money were and was the only other person with keys to her house (obv he still has the right to be super angry, I would be too no matter how valid the reason was, but she still had a valid enough reason)
@@Yellowbeing082 year relationship, I guess trust isn’t a thing anymore. I would’ve flipped my room upside down before suspecting my SO, that’s just sad.
@@senpai-lol4310 I honestly do not know my reaction, but even if I frenetically started searching something I might not find it for the panic, and I'm pretty much a, impulsive person, so remembering I had put it somewhere very well, I'd point my finger too. So Idk, still might be a trust issues problem even if I see it as an impulsive type
@@KSFerncrazy how it was still in the drawer. She just didn’t check good enough and didn’t bother asking for help finding it. She spent more time ruining his reputation then looking for the money
@@IronpathsCrazy how it was in a space she didn't know existed, and also crazy how NOWHERE in the post does it say how the search for the money went. It could have taken hours, days, even up to a week before she came to the conclusion she came to. The poster chose to focus on her mistake and trying to make up for it, going out of her way to post that the boyfriend was completely innocent, rather than elaborate on the whole process of searching for the money. Learn reading comprehension.
You can't undo the damage, but her contacting their mutual friends and him is the best she could do. I respect her integrity, I hope that he's doing better.
At least she's apologising, it takes a fair bit of moral integrity to own up to your mistakes like that.
You should NEVER blame someone, when you aren't a 100% sure (even if it means ripping that drawer, to be sure), because it CAN ruin a persons life.
Update?
Posted it, basically she apologised and told everyone but didn't say anything about the Ex's reaction to the news
I know these stories are for teenagers but some are so silly and unrealistic. If you think your boyfriend is a thief after 2 years, this cannot be based on one incident. You probably already have doubts and are better off out, or you have poor mental health and need support.
Here’s what would have realistically happened after a two year relationship…
GF: I can’t find my cash, have you taken it?
BF: no of course not. Have you looked properly? Take everything out the draw.
*both proceed to take all out the draw and spot the hole* or *one thinks to take it apart because losing things down the back of fully working draws is very common*
They find the money. End of situation.
Wow! That's why you don't blame people for shit unless you're 100% sure.
Yea you can tell some people here have never lived in homes where the person you trusted most betrayed you. If she's experienced betrayal by someone she trusted, then its likely that she thought "oh i trusted him, but if i follow the logic with the information currently available, then it's entirely possible/likely that he stole from me. Because even people you trust can do bad things."
There are better ways she could have handled it, absolutely. But she isnt a bad person for making this mistake, she just needs to calm down and think through all the options next time. Good on her for owning up to it and trying to undo what damage she can
love how she actually apologized and didn’t just brush it off
Yeah bro dodged a bullet, if you can't believe your so you can't be in a relationship.
Honestly apologize to everyone else first. Especially since his rep was ruined bc of it. But it seems trust might have been an issue bf.
Here is paragraph
He got mad and the OP family thought she did it for attention and just wanted to end reletionship
That’s literally a sentence, do we need to review what the definition of a paragraph is?
@@jordanswann346be nice
I'm sorry but you are no paragraph man.
@@jordanswann346 and i just made it shorter so people know what happened next gee
@@Simp-YNHey, thank you for going out of your way for doing this!
This is why we should apply "innocent until proven guilty" to our real lives as well.
This is why u don’t just assume something on someone. Or a situation like this can happen. I feel so bad for both sides.
Even if she apologizes which I think is right and nice of her to do, it wont change anything but make her have peace of mind for potential ruining someone’s friendship based on her overreaction.
If the mutual friends decide to be his friend again, it wont fix/change the fact that in a tough scenario there mutual friends chose her side instead of trying to her the boyfriend out and maybe not playing sides as that what a proper friend should do.
She should give him the money for compensation
She messed up so bad bro
If I were her ex, I’d accept her apology, and then continue to part ways.
Hate how sometimes a forgetful or self scorned partner in a relationship can break up someone's entire world.
That says a lot about you, your insecurities and inability to trust somebody. Maybe you shouldn’t be in a relationship
I have mad respect for you for making things right
Something got lost in a drawer and her first thought was to accuse her boyfriend of 2 years, not just pull out the drawers and check behind? She was looking for an excuse, horrible person. At least shes apologizing so hopefully he can get his friend back.
Hope dude stands strong, no trust no relationship. Let her learn from her mistake and move on.
Poor guy. I had an ex accuse me if stealing from him once. Unfortunately he wasn't as classy as op, and when he figured out what happened to the money, he continued to let people think it was me rather than admit that he'd spent it while drunk and forgot.
It's over. Blaming and not trusting your partner makes relationship impossible. The damage is done and it's permanent, you cannot redeem yourself from this.
This is why you never jump to conclusions.
Tbh, if even after a 2 year relationship you couldn't believe him and had doubts regarding him, then you didn't deserve him although I'm glad you thought about apologizing instead of letting it be.
Honestly, good on both of them for breaking up, since there was intially no trust in the relationship. Hopefully, some of the damage done can be undone by talking to the mutual friends though
I’m glad they know how stupid that apology is gonna sound and how they are in the wrong
Both him and his current GF will appreciate the apology.
Thinking your SO stile from you is a perfectly good reason to want to break up. Obviously OP looked around and asked everyone before assuming it had to be the bf so it's not like she overreacted, she genuinely thought he stole her money.
That said she was wrong and not only is she admitting it, but she's also apologizing to her ex and letting everyone else affected know. It might not fix everything, but it sure is more than many of us would care to admit
Well at least she has the self respect to apologize even though this will probably never be forgiven and the damage is beyond done.
I hope her ex sued the shit out of her after the apology.
Bruh. It's one thing to accuse him of wrongdoing, but it's another for his mutual friend to simply accept that he had stolen it despite no evidence.
If I'm the guy, I would not forgive all of them for accusing me without evidence and simply based it on the process of elimination that does not factor the possibility of a robber.
Bro dodged an enormous bullet
There was an update. The ex was in pretty bad shape, and several people refused to believe that he didn't do it.
The rule of thumb is, defend him as loudly and as publicly as you attacked his character. Not that OP will get him back, but clearing his name in full is the right thing to do.
you should always own you mistakes, even if things dont return to the way hey were, you will respect yourself later
😮Yowza!!!! At least you are willing to come clean and go public to restore his repulation. Please do so asap. It could happen to anyone.
Hate the people that say “GoOd On HeR fOr ApPoLoGiSiNg” i know damn well if roles reversed none of you would have that response
If you weren't able to trust the ex when they said that they didn't take it, enough to end the relationship, then there were issues already there that would have created problems further down the line. Hopefully the farce is enlightening on both ends on the matter of trustworthiness.
Wow, terrible people out there
I would have been long gone if they start to apologize a month later.
I mean, it’s a very touchy situation because the money seemed to have vanished. If no one else was there, where could it have been. Poor guy, reputation tainted and friends lost. If I were him, I’d be so upset. I probably wouldn’t want to forgive the people the doubted me right away. Even when I do forgive them, I may not want to be close with them. Maybe they called him a thief and other names… it could have been very traumatic for him.
I couldn't imagine thinking my long term boyfriend stole my money but if he was there all day alone then what else could it be. But if he had left at all during the day, then I would just have to go with someone broke in and stole it. Maybe I am naive
Accusing him should probably be the last thing
You maybe misremembered, or broken furniture acting wierd
@@salahabdalla368 Personally, It would be one of the last things I think of. I would have thought about every other possibility and I have a horrible memory so misremembering is a big one for me. But who knows this man's character. Maybe it was not too far off to think that he stole it.
If you don’t trust his word i suppose you don’t deserve him tbh
But good for you that your apologizing
Give him the money. Since he took the flack for it he should have it.
Sue for defamation. Woman doesn't make any effort to find it, so she accused him of stealing. She sounds crazy, she probably bad-mouthed him for the entire 3 months, to everyone that would listen to. Then finds it and is like oops
It's over, but good of her to try to apologize, and tell others. Bet he hung up on her.
Don’t apologize. You saved him a relationship of mistrust. The ones that cut him out as well just shows who the bad apples were. Good riddens
Hopefully she doesn’t expect they can get back together after this
Yeah she better tell all his friends and family
The fact that this person blamed his boyfriend it means that he actually has a thinking that he could take his stuff
He's the one who dodged a bullet, over dramatic much? Bloody hell
You definitely f-d up, but you're a big person to apologize about it all. It might be too late for all that, but you're doing the right thing.
The responsible thing to do is tell everyone that hes honest and innocent
Ngl she should pay him the money
its good that you’re holding yourself accountable but i honestly hope he finds someone better bc what you did is genuinely awful, like you pretty much ruined this guys life for a misunderstanding, making him lose friends and turning people against him. i hope the best for him but you need to do a lot better next time and you should probably start using your brain a lot more often rather than acting upon your feelings
Yes please do apologise and inform mutual friends for your actions tho he doesn't need those friends if they're gonna turn their back on him for this
At least she is owning up to it, its just a classic move to ruin a mans life but she is doing the right now
Take a feather pillow to the roof of the tallest building in your town on a windy day. For every person you told pull a handful of features from the pillow and throw them into the blowing wind . Wait the same amount of time from when you told the first person until you corrected the last. Then go and pick up every feature that you through into the wind. When you have picked up every feature then you can begin to ask him for forgiveness..
Relationships are like a trust fall, never do it with someone you can’t truly believe in.
It was reasonable for her to assume it was him. Now she can only make the best out of it.
Thank god. That guy Dodged a Cannon. I am so Happy he managed to escape from a Relationship where his Partner doesnt even Trust him after being Together for 2 Years.
Relationship was probably doomed with that level of distrust regardless.
Also, learn how to search properly. We all have "lost" things, but turning the room upside down usually yields results. Good listen to learn before you go pointing fingers at people with good history and no motives like drug or gambling addiction
She should’ve genuinely looked harder, I don’t feel any pity
OMG, I still would of fucking assumed I lost it before thinking he stole it. I hope she isn't expecting a second chance