Icon For Hire ~ Sorry About Your Parents ~ Lyrics
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 14 ноя 2015
- Requested by Lyoko Beats
Artist: Icon For Hire
Album: Icon For Hire
Song: Sorry About Your Parents
Track: 5
Video by: Ethelia Jumper
Lyrics:
I'm sorry about your parents, they sound like bad people
Your daddy sounds like a jerk
I guess your mama didn't know the gift she got when she got you
I'm sorry about your life, you had it pretty rough
Bending over backwards, never good enough
You poor thing, it must suck to be you
And I know it's not your fault, it never is, is it?
I know what it's like staying up all night nursing wounds
It takes more than I have, pick fights with the past, I always lose
Oh, don't you know? That's no way to live
I know what it's like staying up all night nursing wounds
I get it, give me a little credit
I remember when I was that pathetic
Wear my scars on my sleeve, for all the world to see
Like look what they did to me quick, lay on the sympathy thick
You probably have the right to feel how you do
You were mistreated and cheated out of the childhood you needed
And now you'll never succeed if you're so convinced you're defeated
If you're obsessed with your yesterday then you're destined to repeat it
And I know it's not your fault, it never is, is it, is it, is it?
I know what it's like staying up all night nursing wounds
It takes more than I have, pick fights with the past, I always lose
Oh, don't you know? That's no way to live
I know what it's like staying up all night nursing wounds
[x2] 
Видеоклипы
For people calling this victim blaming I think this song isn't addressing people who are currently in an abusive situation. I think this song is for the people who got out of it but are more interested in getting pity and feeling affirmed than in actually healing and moving on. A lot of icon for hire songs talk about the people who wallow and celebrate in their depression and misfortune rather than try to heal.
So true.
yo i thought i wrote this bc of your profile picture and i was so confused
There's not a 1 size fits all recipe for moving on, ya know.
@@Virtualweakness absolutely and affirmation is a very good and helpful thing for people recovering and moving on. My point was that this song seems to be calling out the people who aren't interested in healing and are interested in playing the victim purely because they like the sympathy and attention. That the song isn't just saying suck it up and get over it but rather calling out the people who want to stay in the pain and use blame to keep away from their own responsibility to try to move on and get better. Of course that looks different for everyone and somepeople need more time than others.
Me and my cptsd “am I a joke”
i don’t think it’s victim blaming, i think it’s someone calling out another person for using their past as an excuse for their bad behavior
exactly, how are ppl not getting this??
I like how this is cynical but still sympathetic. It's about not sitting around and feeling sorry for yourself and that you can only do that for so long but you're the only one who can help yourself in the end
Yeah...and it's songs like these that I really need some days to motivate me and get myself out of a slump.
Iffondrel call it a fetish but what makes me happy is being nice to people that sounds cliche as fuck and slightly douchey but really if i do something for someone it will make me feel better the rest of the day
Catz1a sup
Sad
Catz1a what about the kids who are in these situations. what can they possibly do
*5 seconds into song*
me: Hello song, and where exactly have YOU been all my life?
Hiding in your closet.
Watching.
All night
Same , I mean I got over my past, but this describes it perfectly when I was younger the song itself is really good though XD
AlphaPlayzMc Gaming yeah the line that got me is I'm sorry about your daddy he sounds like a jerk that line hit me because he is
“Look what they did to me, Quick lay on the sympathy thick”
This lyric in specific really resonated in me. I rarely act like I have a problem or need help, but when I do I feel like I push it and try to make people feel bad for me. It makes me feel selfish, and it also hurts because rarely do I get anyone to acknowledge it since the only friend I have thinks they need more attention than anyone else
I know what you mean. My parents and others push me to see how I am doing or what is wrong and I kind of just collapse. I hate when it happens because the way people react makes me feel like I'm being a selfish little brat who does whatever she can for sympathy points.
Honeybee the Cosplayer yeah.. I know what you mean..
I used to fine-tune my problems and how I presented them, if at all, to get sympathy, because I was so scared that no one would help me otherwise. And once I had that attention, it was hard to let go of my problems, bc I felt like that's the only thing that gave me the right to be cared for and babied. I've purposely triggered myself into panic attacks to keep that attention. It's selfish and it's a hard coping mechanism to let go. I'm doing my best not to do these things anymore, and I'm finding, slowly, that there are better ways. There is no easy answer, and recovery and reaching out are hard and messy. I hope you're doing better with getting help. You're not selfish for wanting attention. We all need attention, at some point, it just matters how we get it. I believe in you.
Oof
If you ever need someone to talk to you can find me on Instagram at lana.campbell.26687
God, this song. I love how the first verse comes off almost as accusatory tone like "Oh, poor you, you have it so tough" along with the chorus.
Then the second verse happens and you realize the singer *does* know what it's like, and saying that it's not their fault in a sincere genuine way. She's trying to get them to look at life differently and let go of the self imposed guilt you were taught to gaslight yourself into. The whole rest of the song changes at that point.
I really do love this band.
"I know what it's like, staying up all night, nursing wounds"
Relatable.
I wish people were as reliable as music.
Suprova Hossain agreed. the world would be better.
Suprova Hossain guess what?...people make music
My friend, lots of people are reliable, just hard to find.
I don't nurse physical wounds, I nurse mental ones. The easiest ones to hide, the hardest ones to cure. You can heal a broken bone, it's near impossible to fix a broken mind.
EnjiTheBrokenFork lyrics don’t = music, music by definition is sound not poems
"it takes, takes more then i have
pick fights with the past, i always lose"
holy shit that hit me so hard, i've never related with a line so much
This song was made to help people relate to them as well
Same... Until I listened to Why 😔
Ikr
"If you're obsessed with your yesterday then you're destined to repeat it" was it for me
"If you're obsessed with your yesterday then you're destined to repeat it"
The comments section both saddens me and gives me hope at the same time...
+Starlilynight I know right, sometimes it makes me feel more happy and thankful for what I have, you know?
space hipster totally
TØP trash ikr
Does it give you hope of morning ? Icon for hire fans will get this owo
+Lochin.x
YUUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
"You were mistreated and cheated out of the childhood you needed."
I have never heard a truer line of music in my entire life.
The point is that the person the singer is talking to is using their abusive childhood as an excuse for current toxic behavior. And the singer has a similar experience, and calls them out on their bullshit. It's not saying people who suffer from abuse shouldn't talk about it, nor is it meant to be relatable, it's saying that you can't use the abuse as an excuse for your *own* toxic behavior.
I agree and also not to blame others because of your own shit. Sure, people threw shit on you, but not ALL the shit you’re buried in is someone else’s fault.
This low key feels like a callout.
LAngel2 there's a reason for that.
It high key is one
@@pariswiese9135 exactly. Lol 😆
It is 👀
It’s supposed to be
Out of all of the songs out there people say save lives, this one did it for me.
Made me snap in reality, past is in the past, and when it repeats, as it's trying to, fucking stand up for yourself. Don't let the past get you down, it still does at times, but this song helps whenever it tries to haunt you. It's like a shove into reality, there's people with worse problems. It hurts, you went through it, but you have to move on. Don't get stuck in the past, accept it and look forward, and let your past help you to help others going through it. Don't look down at it, look up and smile. After all...It's shaped you into who you are now.
thx
Look what they did to me quick, lay on sympathy thick! Lol.
What
so true, I know the felling of wanting to give up but I'm still here couse I want to help people who have gone through stuff like this
seth speegle I'm glad you're out here still, just keep your head up and help everyone you can, cause one person in their lives can save them from doing things that their peers wouldn't wanna think about.
I feel like this song has more of a mocking tone to it than a comforting one, its passive aggressive lmao
I've always seen it as a victim mocking a abuser because the abuser blames all their problems and actions on their parents.
Yeah like that part where they’re like, “It must SUCK to be you.” Actually, it sounds like this person is complaining about their problem, and the singer is like “Hey, I’ve been through it too” and telling them to stop complaining about their past. Actually, it fits in perfectly with when they say “I get it, give me a little credit, I remember when I was that pathetic.”
Kidd Husky I wouldn’t say the song is mocking, the point of the song is quite literally written out in the second verse “ if you’re obsessed with your yesterday then you’re destined to repeat it”
She’s saying through the song that, yeah you can blame your past, you can blame your parents or your ex or whoever but your actions are controlled by you. You can keep crying about how they ruined your life but you are in control and everything else is in the past, it’s time to take charge and stop dwelling on something that can’t change. The point of this song isn’t mocking, but it’s also not suppose to be comforting. The idea of the song is basically tough love.
Stop giving yourself excuses for your own bad behavior and your own problems. Those are your problems and your behavior, you have to take responsibility and fix them.
Prolly datboi WinkWonk okay yeah I agree that maybe the song is not supposed to be super agressive, but they’re kind of sending a kind of rough messge like “hey, stop dwelling on your past” and all that.
K Z yah that’s what I just said fam 😂
A lot of people are talking about how this song helped them in the comments and sad stuff and meanwhile I'm just
I just
I just like the song man
0bsessed_Freak
Same lol
legit same
Yeah me too
_Same here_
Meanwhile I'm writing edgy sad fanfics and I'm like: _this fits weirdly well, this is perfect_
Impressive. "Hey, life sucks, shit happens. Get over it because you can't fix the past." Good message, most songs in this genre cater to just being downtrodden and beaten from the things that can't be fixed or avoided.
@
The song actually means; "Not all parents are good. You can survive this though." At least, that's I interpret it.
Idk for me the title mainly implies that it's about toxic parents, and then it shifts to moving on and staying strong. "Get over it" isn't really a good message for people who have faced abusive parenting, especially since they might still be feeling the effects
that's not the message...but okay.
just monika How do you know? :/
This song I feel is to say “hey I get you’ve been through a lot and it’s not easy, but you’re not there anymore, you’re capable and you can past this and live life to the fullest” but it doesn’t exactly tell it sugar coated, it tells it how it is; this song is so healing for me.
EDIT: it’s not easy living life to the fullest when you’ve been through a lot, but everyone deserves to do it, no matter what they’ve been through.
This song. It’s easy for someone to say “get yourself together and stop blaming the past” , it’s so easy. But when you don’t have the inner strength to do that, you just can’t , it’s an underlying thing. I fell this song in one way kind of says “stop feeling sorry for yourself “ but at the same time they are saying “I’ve been there.” Maybe the person had full support from loving family and friends to get through life but some people don’t.
LITERALLY. im 17 and a half, my family is dysfunctional as fuck and i have no one else but them. no friends at all. severe depression, adhd, probably bpd or bipolar 2, so the best i CAN do at this point in my life is to sit and feel sorry for myself because no one else does lmao. this song is kinda fucked
The song is more about the people that justify their abusive actions just because theyre been abused in the past.
I like to imagine this song being sung by someone talking to their past self. Maybe they're not fully over the trauma, they found a way to cope with it, but they obviously didn't get help and feel a lot of anger about their past ''weakness'', not understanding the abuse wasn't their fault and still thinking they were weak and pathetic to go through this.
Dang man...it was like this song was talking to me. I have felt everything in this song.
Shadow the Winged Wolf me too...
me too?
Shadow the Winged Wolf same. Ive had it Pretty rough
Me to
Shadow the Winged Wolf
Aww, I hope your alright though.
Okay, the points you made hurt, but I get the picture. I both love this song and feel uneasy about it.
You feel uneasy about it because you're in the same position, in a sense.
+Katie Richards
I think that was the point. It was very forward yet understanding. Crazy combo, but incredible
Seriouslyyyy. I can't think of any other way being called pathetic could be productive, but sometimes people gotta snap out of that mindset because we really do all have to fix ourselves.
It seems to me like its a person who's been physically abused listen to a person who is being / was emotionally abused talk about it and think that they are overreacting because some people think that they are
I went through a lot of abuse as a child, starting at age 4. Multiple abusers, a narcissistic mother and an absent father who was always on long haul runs. I packed so much shit up to raise my son, and the few years have been hell as it exploded out. And I decided to go get help, to stop letting the past decide my future. It's damn hard work, I've had two suicide attempts in two years, and I missed some major life milestones when I was in residential treatment. What I have learned through all of it is this:
1. We can't control feelings or thoughts, but we ARE responsible for our reactions.
2. There is no place for comparing pain or scars. It's all subjective, and one person's experience doesn't cancel out anothers.
3. You have to decide that you're willing to do the work. It doesn't help to go to a therapist and not be open and honest. If you go to treatment, go to the groups, work with your therapist.
4. Be gentle and have grace for yourself, and take responsibility for your life choices.
I'm still walking the road, it's full of stumbling blocks, but I have seen how good life can be in full recovery. We will always bare our scars, and we can make them beautiful or keep trying to hide them.
I've been mentally and physically abused by my parents for years, bullied in school and completely destroyed. Although some lines made me feel attacked and made fun of, this song still fits my life quite well (I hide my cuts no matter what).
It hurts so much to see how many other people relate to this song.. all I can say is that I'm so terribly sorry, because no matter who you are or what you believe in, you don't deserve such abuse. Stay strong, because in the end, life always gets better.
For some it doesn't actually get better.
@@sakuraogami6885 yeah but that's our fault
@@catsaresocute650 wdym by ''but that's our fault'' tho it isn't in our hands if all people in our life are being shity to us, idk how is your life or how people treat you; but people who be ok with that they do just becuz they dont fkin care about any shit anymore but people who just cant be ok with that cuz they wanna live a normal life just dont know what to do so they talk shit about themselves such as ''i wanna die, idk what to do with my life, my life is so shity, im so worthless'' and they talk like that with everyone cuz they have no one to talk to, and some people should make them feel like theyre not alone instead of making fun of them; so its society's fault. and i know its not what the song is about but just to let you know
@@madisontucker649 I think the song is about not living in your past misery and that you shouldn’t excuse your present/past actions on past trauma/abuse and the lines (if you’re obsessed with your yesterday then you’re destined to repeat it) is sending the message that you need to grow and overcome the past and be in the present.
I hope things get better. But I just want to mention that I totally get this song. I came from an abusive home too. But it gets better. And I think the point of this song is that you don't have to stay trapped in that hell they made for you. You can get out. You can choose to heal and get better. You don't have to let your past define you. You can be a survivor instead of just a victim. I think this song is a message that you are more than just the abuse you've suffered. And you can choose to grow and flattish and become a happy, healthy person in spite of everyone that tried to his you down. It's hard work, but after all, living all is the best revenge. So hopefully things are better for you. But in any case, don't give up, bevause you deserve to move past it and heal. You deserve to be happy.
This song slaps me back to reality when I start going into that deep dark hole
.....of depression?
God, I hope so.
(excuse my mind)
+FrostedFlames why would you hope for them to be depressed..?
One Second of Chemical Phanic At The Disco I don't
One Second of Chemical Phanic At The Disco what they meant was that they were glad it shook them out of depression
This song slaps me into the dark hole not out ;-; and i can never leave that hole......
I love this song's message. Its really saying that the reason it still bothers you is that you're living in the past. It encourages you to keep going and move on, beacuse things get better. "if you're obsessed with your yesterday then you're destined to repeat it"
These lyrics are pretty straightforward and eye opening.I really enjoy it and its definitely a motivation to change ourselves no matter how we suffered in the past. Keep on digging guys and gals! :)
I love this comment
I vow to never treat my future child/children the way my parents treat me right now.
Yah
I discovered this band from this song
*I FOUND THE LEMON FIRST*
LEMON
Morgan Lemons I SEE YOU EVERYWHERE
HOLY SHIT ITS YOUUU
LEMON SENPAI! I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT YOU'RE HERE! I USUALLY SEE YOU IN ANIME STUFF, HOW HAVE ONLY THIS MANY PEOPLE SEEN YOU SO FAR?!?!
I love Ariel's way of smacking us out of where we're stuck. Yes it's harsh but it's . . . kind, really, kind and generous. She screamed me out of where I'd let myself be stuck.
i came out to have a good time and honestly i'm feeling so attacked rn
Eiman Al Kindi hey me too wanna go look at some memes--
Big Mood tbh
I came out to attack time and honestly I'm having such a good people rn. ( Idk???)
That says a lot about you then.
@@nathandean2937 I came out to attack people and I'm having such a good time rn.
Can relate to this song. My father may be a narcissist. I'm like my father in some ways. You have a choice in which direction you take in life sometimes. I chose not to become like him.
Same
Same but with my mom. Who herself was abused by her dad. :/
@@ILoveMahCat same , but then uses that to justify it
@@curtismoody4715 the cycle of abuse 😔
man, i love a depressing song as much as the next guy, but icon for hire is what people need to hear. not only does she tap directly into the societal ills and the struggles people go through, but she inspires you to actually overcome it by showing you exactly what youre doing wrong. its like a slap in the face, but its what everyone needs
This song is so much inspiration. That no matter how much your parents screw you up, you can still choose to be better.
I know this song is about “be better not bitter” and most likely about parents who try to manipulate their kids by excusing their actions by saying their parents were abusive so that’s why they’re like that or saying their kids “couldn’t handle the shit they went through” but holy shit you have to be in a healthy mindset to listen to it because it can very quickly turn into making you feel like it’s your fault you’re in your current situation
I agree. Based on what I know of the singer/songwriter, this is probably where it's coming from, even.
Not really? It's more about a person who justifies shitty actions and attention seeking with shitty home life or abuse they faced. Happens quite more often then one expects. Healing starts with the choices you make.
This song and 'The sound of madness' have the exact same vibe. That 'Yeah you had it bad, but don't try to negate responsibility for your actions because of your trauma.' Energy
Never thought I’d hear a song that made me feel both empowered and attacked at the same time.
I have a very rough family life and I used to try very hard to stay positive and say it will get better but it never did and it’s been getting worse and worse everyday. I still live here with my dysfunctional and abusive family and at this point I’ve stopped trying because I literally have nowhere else to go right now, I’m not old enough to just leave and live on my own and the CPS did nothing to help me. I still try and stay strong and I try my best not to bother people with my family life, but god damn is it hard and this song made me feel guilty for not being able to really do anything for myself..but that’s ok because I get the message
Acidic Rot please stay strong! Youre loved. Xoxo
Honestly, all CPS does is send a consular that never helps. My mom got really mad at my sis and hit her with a broom and she had a bump on her head the next day. She went to the school,so they sent over CPS. All they did was send ovwr a counsular that did nothing than talk to us. I hate counsulars for that reason. But hey, through all of this you need to stay strong. I know i am a person that does not even know you, but if you stayed strong for all of this time then you can stay strong for the rest of your life. So please do it for someome that you dont even know. My instagram acc is always open to talk if you want. Its saythename_september look it up and you will probably find it.
September Dodson CPS tore me from my family and nearly sent my parents to prison, so maybe everyone is different in their type of CPS handlings. hope you do better though
You should feel attacked I think it's useless telling other people about your problems if you can't recognize your REAL problems from the start. You're stating your problems for the sympathy and attention. This song is stating that truth.
Acidic Rot @
First time hearing this song and I freakin' love it. Like half way through, I was like ok this seems a little condescending - which it kind of is - but then she says "If you're obsessed with the yesterday then you're destined to repeat it" and it all clicked. She gets the pain and all the crap that you've been through. It sucks, but you need to quit your groveling and move on - you're gonna have to refuse to be the victim if you want, it to stop being so. Best song I've heard in a while and one I can relate to on both sides - the singer and the newest "victim."
did i just got slapped in the face ? she shredded me to pieces
i like this song because it's telling it can help with depression but it's not sugar coating it and telling you straight up that living in the past won't help anything
Tell that to people with PTSD.
Yes I like the song but for people with ptsd it's nearly impossible to not live in the past
I doubt half these people have ptsd, they havent seen their buddies blow up, wondering if a stray bullet will pierce their skull, or if they will eat tomorrow. I hate these sympathy addicts that act like having shit parents gives the ptsd. And if it did, then they are too thin-skinned to live in the real world.
@@thecombodeluxe3109 you can have PTSD from abuse.. it's not just military
@@thecombodeluxe3109 because you are stupid dumbass
"You feel mistreated and cheated,
Out of the childhood you needed."
This is, by far, my favorite line of this song, and one of my all-time favorite sentences from a song lyric in general!
It hits extremely close to home, and I absolutely love it.
One of the worst parts about having narcissistic/abusive parents is that nobody usually knows who they really are. Abusers fake their personality in front of everyone else. When it’s just you and them they will treat you completely different. My parents were my first bullies and growing up with them everyday was hell.
I hate it when people come over to my house and tell me my parents are so sweet and perfect. I get told how lucky I am that my parents are still together & aren’t divorced. I hate when people assume that middle class parents can’t be abusive. As a kid I would have traded anything for loving parents. My parents may be together but it doesn’t mean they aren’t toxic. For parents to give their kid financial support and not abuse them is the bare minimum. They don’t deserve any respect from me.
I have mixed feelings about this song
About?
@@GothBiDemiGirl this song i think
*hugs everyone in the comment section* It's gonna be okay, you're doing great. Just keep going, everything will get better, you just gotta keep fighting. It will be okay, you didn't do anything wrong. Your parents are just sick in the head. You're doing great, just keep fighting
I'm not going to lie, I burst into tears after I read this. Thank you so much, you have no idea how much I needed this.
Pretty much everyone in the comments of how much it relates to them, and how ' Eye Opening ' it was for them. There are air quotes there because when I listen to the song, I can sort of relate to it, but it hits me so hard, that I can't take it. I seriously can't deal with the overwhelming amount of guilt I feel when I listen to it, and it makes me feel worse than i already did. And I know why.
Haha, you kinda are xD
No, just kidding. The song made me feel exactly the same when I was a teen. But now I'm an adult. I grew up and I change myself to how I want to be. ♡
Since she is not singing about teens or children in awful home enviourments. But about people who are grown up and can't let go (of the past). Like they are still living in that hell. And are always "complaining" about it. So she is telling them to get over it and be the stronger person.
That's why she is asking those who live in their pasts if it's their parents fault or their own (now as grown ups).
This song makes so much sense
no matter what i do, i will always be living in the past. i will always live in 2017. no matter how much it hurt me. no matter how many bad people i met. my brain doesn't even care about the worst thing that happend in this year. i just cant get over it. i love the message of this song, but its nearly impossible for me to live one day without crying about the past and wishing i could go back to the happy times and change the bad ones.
edit: OH MAN THIS COMMENT IS 1 YEAR OLD NOW i didnt even realize. i've found ways to cope with everything and ever since 2020 started i havent cried once about my abusive ex. i worry about other shit now and im still not alright and in need of help but i feel like i've finally moved on and it makes me happy!
this is gonna sound cursed but jojo helped me a lot fjdbd
If you’re still here in 2021, you’re a legend
okay; i see everyone stating that it "snapped them back into reality" when they listened to this song. that's not how it is for me. what i see this song as is a commentary on how people who are physically abused see people who are emotionally abused. now, i have never experienced this treatment, as i am emotionally abused and manipulated by almost my entire family (the only people who haven't fucked me over are my uncle and his wife), but i have seen it happen.
people who are emotionally abused don't have scars, cuts, or bruises to show as evidence all of the time. i don't usually have them, but from time to time i do end up having them. but because of this people who have been physically abused say that emotional abuse is fake; that it's just the victims complaining about their life. that's actually forced said mentality into the victims. i have that mentality because i have a hard time seeing emotional abuse anywhere in media--the first instance that i did was Crona Gorgon (Soul Eater) and i didn't see anything wrong with it at the time because i was only a child and had never found anything about abuse online.
once i did, holy fuck did i want to talk about it. my friends help me so much with the problems i have going on and i'm grateful for them, hell one of them is a victim of physical abuse that he went to help for, but there are always, *always* going to be idiots who insist that emotional abuse victims are lying for sympathy. so, of course, it's taken much less seriously and it can be hard to come out and tell people that you're being abused.
micamiin I'm pretty sure the parts about the scars are meant to reference people who self harm because of emotional abuse AND people who have been physically abused.
Scars means self harm, they talk about self inflicted scars. Also I can talk out of experience emotional abuse is as traumatizing as sexual abuse if not more because nobody believes you even if it is kind of obvious that you are traumatized I mean my severe anxiety and depression didn't develop out of nowhere. People that say any kind of abuse is not real aren't well informed enough, I mean it is well known that mainly emotional abuse leads to sociopathy as the emotional intelligence of a person is severly damaged as a young child, also a lot of problems come to existence because of it all of them linked to a low EQ and that is actually a problem in every part of the persons life, my life is f.ex seriously fucked up and due to my really low EQ it doesn't seem like I can find somebody that is willing to be there for me mainly because people tend to say stuff like: Just stop it. As if I could-
Also there are people lying for attention but those are seriously fucked up too if you don't have problems you wouldn't do that those people need help too but different help.
nessitis To be honest Brother i know where you are coming from. I cut to show my scars on the outside to reflect the ones on the inside. At the age of 7 i had carved useless into the flesh of my leg. Because i was called it everyday (about 10 times too) from my mother and grandmother merely because i thought differently then the "useful" kids. So now i cjt to prevent myself from commiting.
LordSauron 22
You should probably go see a therapist if you cut
Y'know what... I listened to this before, I thought it was about someone getting out of issues, or that someone is being abused... But I can see it more for what it is now... Now that I am numb and beaten down by my whole family, its about nursing wounds mentally or physically but not enjoying the pitty and or taking your issues just to get pitty
I love this song. But reading the comments bruise me. I realise what this song is about. and that people have gone through worse than me. Making me feel like a baby, or that I'm overreacting for crying when someone insults me. Or simply because I'm depressed. People have gone through so much worse than me. That they'd beg for a family like mine. Or "friends" like mine. Or my "talent" like mine. But I decided it wasn't good enough...I was so greedy...I tried to give away my life.....when someone would kill for a life like mine?! I absolutely don't feel any better...
Some people can have 'worse' issues in their life, but that doesn't make you or your feelings insignificant because someone has experienced something different. You still have feelings, you still have things happen to you, and you still react. No one should be looked at by what or how much something has happened to them. You and what you feel are important. Certainly you still should appreciate what you have, and help others, but its alright to have feelings. Stay strong dude, people care
No one's situation is "superior" to yours. You shouldn't feel bad for having depression. Depression doesn't discriminate, you could have the happiest life yet still plagued with the disease. I don't know what kind of people made you believe that, but your situation does matter. You should seek help because depression can lead to suicide.
Pain isn't a competition, my friend.
Just because people have gone through worse than you doesn't mean that that your experience isn't justified. Anyone who feels like they've been treated badly has a good explanation, except the one's who exaggerate. Seeing as you're quite humble about what you've been through, I believe that you have a reasonable story. If you need me, then I'm always here to talk.
RazzyRazz “ telling me not to cry because some people have it worse is like me telling you not to smile because some people have it better” -Unknown
You can't overcome depression by diving deeper into it. You defeat your pain when you forget it existed, even for mere moments.
This song is like a stab in the back and that same person hugging you afterwards...
I love it!
edit: i know everyone is going through something different and in the end my comment is just a comment and i made it when i was like 11, if its not for you and completely unhelpful or preachy (which it is) then im sorry lol i really was just a kid but regardless i hope everyones doing well. and yes most people are probably here because they like the song i was too lol
Hey, you! Yeah, silly, you, the one reading this! I know times are pretty tough, but trust me, you'll be okay! Whoever hurts you clearly does not realize that you are an amazing person. They can't accept it. Why? Because REAL and TRUE acceptance is seeing with your heart, not your eyes!
I want you to know a few things, sweetheart.
-Your skin isn't paper, please don't cut it. c:
-You aren't a shadow, don't hide. :)
-Your life isn't a film, don't end it.
That's really kind of you, and there needs to be a lot more caring people like you around. I showed this to my friend and she stopped cutting. Thank you, for helping my friend out.
Grace Payne No need to thank me. I am really happy I helped your friend! And thank you. :)
Kodia 0209 No problem, you deserve it! XD
Thank you
AllAboutNightcore I didn't write that but hope you're feeling better then!!!
I used to listen to this thinking about people in these situations where they have horrible relationships with their parents & use it as a scapegoat to give up on trying, & then I realized it’s me. I have a horrible relationship with my father, I seemingly always have. She’s talking about people like me. That’s what I’ve been doing… not anymore, though, because “if you’re obsessed with your yesterday than your destined to repeat it.”
This is the first time I've ever listened to this song and I feel like she's singing directly to me and I can't stop crying.
This song fits me so well I cried the first time I heard it
+SeaGlass I wanted to cry but my mom was in the same room when i listened to it 4 the 1st time hahaha
+PierceTheBlackVeilSirens 08 Best fucking name evwr
+AceTheMythicalPancake thank you :)
Why can't people just talk about their past without being accused of wanting pity. Like some people just wanna feel like their not alone and make others not feel like their alone either....there's nothing wrong with that....
Yeah I don't think that's what this song is about. It's just that a lot of us let the past define who we are now. Like being bitter, unhappy and cynical just because you think that that's how it has to be after what was done to you but the truth is that it's entirely up to you and you can be happy and everything you want to be despite what happened. Of course you should get therapy and be able to talk about your trauma, but be a story of strength and show that nothing and nobody can dim your light no matter how bad it gets. I always have felt like your inner child isn't destroyed by trauma, it's just covered up with layer after layer each one more numb and jaded than the last as more things happen to you. The child is still there though. Just break through those layers you built on to protect yourself and be that child again. Experience the beauty and joy of the world because you still can. Realize all of the endless things that you can do and be, how free you are. Youre not dead. Lying down and giving up on ever being happy because of the past is weak.
It took me a while for my inner child to come out. Heck it still hard to be free from the past. Not from the memories that hold it back but the feelings. Having people who you trust to be yourself around is so important. Your family isn't defined by blood but the people you choose to call family.
Speaking up about your past is admirable and takes a lot of strength, but this song is for the ones who tell everyone they can find and wallow in their self pity. They take what they can get and use it as an excuse.
It’s trauma, it takes forever to get over, but it’s not an excuse to give up on trying.
Yeah but it's in the past and you shouldn't Care lol
@@catsaresocute650 Fun fact, trauma leaves lasting affects on people and that's why it's trauma.
God this sounds just like my life. My dad is always working and when he gets home, he spends time with my jackass of a brother, he doesn't even pretend to take an interest in my likes and interests. and my mother is constantly trying to turn me into something i'm not....HER. 😔
I feel so sorry for you. Wish I could give you a hug :(
Jeyfeather 1234 i would like that. *hugs you*
I was neglected by my mother until the age of 10 when my dad and his fiance got custody of me
Saphira Banes your definitely not alone believe me. my parents make it abundantly clear my siblings are all adored except for me they can't stand me. they have pictures of all my siblings(I have 4) in the living room there was one picture of me as a kid, I took it down 3weeks ago and no one has even noticed. sad part is all except my little sister are complete screw ups all of them in and out of jail and I've never been to jail, none of them except my little sister has a job I'm 22 (they are ages 19,20,25,26) and I have 2 jobs to make my bills I struggle with all my responsibility and staying true to the correct path only to get treated like an outcast from my parents but I have a bestfriend who has had a similar life and we keep each other moving forward :) just don't forget your never alone we struggle but we struggle togather and even if you never meet there is somebody out there who knows what your going through cause they've been through it
kayne garcia aw i'm sorry you have to go threw all of that.
*Y E S*
It is hard to get over trauma, especially when it went on for so long, and you were the only one who knew the wrongs being done to you. But once you’re able to, you need to move on. Don’t keep it in and wait for it to explode. Talk to a safe person about it, feel it, accept it, let it go, and move on.
It will always be a part of you and be something that made you who you are, but *what happened to you or what you did does not define you.*
Omg...Your comment hit me very powerfully... I was almost shocked...
Well...Thank you...
You can also be the problem in your abuse and trauma only if only what you seek from the aftermath of it is sympathy and revenge rather than mercy from you and remorse from them...
I thought she said "You pour things in my socks to be you" .-.
This song describes everything I've ever wanted to say to my friend
Bexxa Murdock
Then just say it. It will help both of you.
So damn ture U-U
issue is that it's not my past it's my present
I've never figured out if there was a hint of sarcasm behind this song
ZelaNightPhantom ohh thank you
Lemme get real edgy for a second and tell you about how this song helped me in a rough time and how it led me to discovering Icon For Hire. Keep in mind I am diagnosed with PTSD and even after all these years, some details are still fuzzy.
In 2015 I was sent to live with my dad and his girlfriend. Said girlfriend was, quite frankly, a horrible person. She hated my mother and took her hatred out on me. ("Every time I see you, I see your mother.") I was manipulated, emotionally and verbally abused by her while my dad did nothing but sit back and watch. No one ever stood up for me and all I could do was endure it.
I discovered this song in 8th grade and it just resonated with me. 13 year old me had been tricked into thinking that my mother, who at the time was desperately searching for me without my knowledge, had abandoned me. Moving to Texas and practically disappearing (Dad and girlfriend hid the letters she sent me and blocked her number)
And then I realized I like girls.
Since I didn't trust them not to search my room while I was gone (it happened a lot) I kept my diary in a locked memo on my tablet. One night I had unlocked the memo so that I could put the tablet into sleep mode to listen for footsteps coming to my room. I guess she had been too quiet for me to hear because one minute I'm writing about a girl I had a crush on and the next my light was on and the girlfriend was yanking my tablet away from me. I remember crying when she started reading what I had been writing. I can't remember what she did with my tablet but she pulled me out of bed by my arm and screamed in my face that I was not bisexual because I'd never had sex with a girl (i was 13, mind you) and I could not be bisexual under her roof.
That summer I finally snapped from the pressure of being compared to the girlfriend's son (a straight A student while I got B's and the occasional C), her homophobia, and my dad suddenly wanting to know all about my (non existent, as i was THIRTEEN) sex life so in the summer of 2017 I tried to kill myself. As had happened many times before, my dad stood back and watched as his girlfriend screamed at me, calling me a disgrace and failure because I was suicidal. For the first time I actually tried to stand up for myself and told her that it was her fault. She slapped me. My dad laughed.
After that a lot of things after that are blurry up until 9th grade. I was phasing out of my love for this song and the band entirely, trying to live up to the girlfriend's expectations of a prim and proper young lady. By that time I was 14 and fully identified as a lesbian.
All throughout my life I've shown signs of ADHD but despite many teachers recommending that I be tested/checked/whatever I was never fully diagnosed. My dad's girlfriend never bothered to listen to the many people making it plain as day that there's something going on, only heard that I wasn't paying attention in school. I got punished for anything below a B and any missing work resulted in I think 10 or 15 pushups per worksheet (lots of missing worksheets)
Fast forward a bunch because its foggy and I don't want to type it all out. Sexual harassment from my dad because he had (or still has) a thing for lesbians csn pretty much sum it up. Turned 15 yada yada... I just don't wanna type it out and this is already really long
Mom finds me. Dad kicks girlfriend out, moves mom in. Dad walks out. Mom and I don't have a car. We get kicked out because dad won't pay rent and we don't have any money (we were also running out of food, for the last week or so we'd only eaten instant rice. I hate instant rice now).
One thing I'll never forget my dad saying and even have an audio recording for proof is "I don't have to be there for you... Constantly."
So yeah. Homeless.
Moved in with an old family friend. He had a thing for kids. Just power through it and always lock the door.
I started voulenteering at an animal shelter and one day my mom comes to pick me up in an unfamiliar car (roommate had a jeep we'd been allowed to use. I really miss that jeep and the bigass speaker in the back 😂)
The car is her therapist's roommate tried to hit my mom and locked her out. We stayed in a hotel for a while and my then girlfriend broke up with me because of it.
We rented a storage unit and a truck and got an escort to the house to get our stuff (in case he tried to hurt us)
We stayed our last night in the hotel and in the morning we moved to the nearest city to stay in the homeless shelter.
I had been an atheist for a long time (about 4 or 6 years, I can't remember) but during our stay I converted to Wicca. I found power in music and you know what I loved more than ever? Icon For Hire :) (low key had a celeb crush on Ariel and proudly won't deny it)
It was only December 13th, 2018 (my mom's birthday!!) That we got our apartment. Been here for almost a year too.
I'm 16 now, 17 in April. Its hard at times but things are getting better. I've tried my best to let go of the past, I can't change it. I still listen to this song sometimes, it and many others helped me through what was probably my darkest hour. I recently came out again as bisexual, too. Remember the "girl" I had a crush on? He's my boyfriend now and I couldn't be happier.
I know it can be hard but I *promise* things will get better. It sounds cliché but it is so, so true. You've made it this far and you have the power to keep going and to find that happiness.
your story was a fucking RIDE. I'm so glad you've finally found happiness. please for the love of g o d talk to me if you ever feel down or anything. I'll try to help as much as I can. I'm so goddamn proud of you for staying strong even with everything life's thrown at you. God bless you and your boyfriend.
Aye. >.<
When all of that is going on,
The last thing anyone needs
Is for Religion to enter the chat.
If there is one prayer I may write for you,
From 2 years in the future
From where you were
2 years ago,
It is that you may know the good power of Love.
Some of us call that power God;
But God, Jesus,
Matters of Christianity and Catholicism,
Just religion in general,
Has become a thing of trauma for many,
Causing a whoooooole new world of fuckery to open up.
Yes, I said "fuckery",
Even if I "shouldn't" be swearing
As one claiming to be a Christian.
I know now
How DANGEROUS
"Bad" religion is.
I also know now,
Outside of fun movies and books,
Matters of the occult can be dangerous, too.
My hope and prayer for you is this:
You get to know Love personally. :3
Some of us call "him" God or Jesus;
Others of us just say "Love", or the Universe;
Whatever term makes this good force of Love
Less traumatizing,
When to even TALK of God or Jesus
Is traumatizing in itself.
I just don't want you to get hurt
Further than you already have
For reasons of evil forces
That we humans have no clue on how to handle.
I believe I may indeed
Be speaking from my own nervousness (and ignorance on Wicca) more than anything,
And it's surely gonna show
In this comment I'm writing.
I admit that wholeheartedly,
And honestly.
So before I go down a dark rabbit hole myself,
My wish for you is this:
Let your heart be open to Love,
The good, true Love from Above
That is Unconditional and has no need of lies and such;
Love Himself / Herself / Itself / Themselves
Will come and find you
And delight in a personal relationship with you. ^.^
I myself call this Love,
God / Jesus. :3
But I can only do that now
From some of my own traumas with Religion
Being resolved;
There was a time I dabbled in Tarot Cards, too,
And HAAAAAAAAAATED anything to do with Jesus,
Cuz I truly believed it was all BS,
And naturally didn't want to be hurt with more BS.
Not gonna lie,
At the risk of making a contradiction
As it seems:
I still very much love Magic today...
In the realm of movies, books and stories,
OC's and art; fantasy.
But I get kinda nervous with occult stuff in Reality. ^_^;
It was always the special effects and "impossible"
That made me love Fantasy Magic,
Like an animator who can make CRAZY-AWESOME things happen,
With some paper, clay,
Or whatever else they use today
In making animated goodness.
Today I won't touch an Ouija board;
Never did,
Never will.
They simply give me the creeps,
And I just don't wanna. xux;
Love, Peace, Goodness, Healing, Recovery
And awesomeness is what I wish you,
And I hope you've seen your life
Continue to change for the better
Since then,
Even if there are still hardships present. ❤
say what you want about IFH but Ariel is a lyrical genius!
Never in my life have I heard any songs that I can identify most with than songs by IFH
I dont think shes as "rude" or victim blaming as people seem to think, like calling out how pathetic it is to wallow in your pain and let it eat you up constantly and all instead of trying to get better is honestly rightful to call out, but right after that she explains she understands that the person in question isnt in the wrong to feel bad about what they were cheated out of, its just that they need to focus on getting better too.
"If you're obsessed your yesterday than you're destined to repeat it"
I would get that tattooed on my body
Pro-tip; Not a good idea to try and use this type of "encouragement" on those with complex- Ptsd
I think most people are losing the main point of the song. Its about not pitying yourself, because there are people who have been through worst. The songwriter even mentioning her own past of wearing her scars on her sleeves. Let this be a message to not focus on your yesterday as said in the song.
i relate to this so much its not even funny
This is the most mature song on this kind of subject I've ever heard.
She's straight up telling someone, "I know what you've had to go through is rough but you need to get passed it and let yourself evolve".
The saddest part about this is...it's the norm to think the world is rotten and we're on ourselves from the start, with the mindset of '[I] succeeded, what's your excuse?" so we have to force ourselves to stand up with nothing but our own skills, not expecting a single person to help us.
The conflicting theme of this song is to stand up for one self, and don't get me wrong - it's a positive message, but no one 'should' be in such a neglectful situation to begin with, and yet it gives a 'stop caring and grow some balls' ideal, which may or may not be self destructive, specially if implanted at a young age where a lot don't have such resolve to get out of their misery pit hole until it's too late.
It's not so much grow some balls as it is work on yourself, just because bad things happened to you doesn't mean you'll have a shit life you always have a choice it's just difficult.
@@aimee_bx9852 finally. You have given me the correct message. Thank you. I know I can and will have a Better positive life
Mixed emotions with this song. On the one hand it's something I'd tell myself when I get to that dark place, it's motivating and sounds like tough love.
On the other hand...
There's a few lines here where depending on who the audience is, where this song can be downright inappropriate and can do more harm than good. "I remember when I was that pathetic Wear my scars on my sleeve, for all the world to see Like look what they did to me quick, lay on the sympathy thick"- I can think of a ton of situations where this is can really nasty to say to someone (let alone yourself) going through hell.
Accusing a person, who's trying their best to live day by day, that they're not hiding their pain well enough which means they MUST be doing it for attention and sympathy. That be a very dangerous claim and downright nasty to shove in their face. ( unless that’s really what's going on, but how the f-k you do you know? We don't know. The song doesn't answer this.)
Plenty of depressed people I know don't want to be a burden to others and feel so guilty over making you worry for them, so saying this to them is just down right horrible. It would sent them into a spiral over their failure to cover up how much pain there in. Like how dare your scars be visible you pathetic person. Just because you wanted someone to care, someone to help you, to notice and give you support where you obviously have none at home- clearly you're just an attention whore who craves it right?
The singer seems to be projecting onto the listener ( assuming that’s who the singer is.. there is a second option...tell you in a sec)
"If you're obsessed with your yesterday then you're destined to repeat it And I know it's not your fault, it never is, is it, is it, is it?" - this line here- the extra "is it?" The way it's an open question could be hinting that perhaps it actually is! Victim blaming maybe? Without context of this EXACT conversation-clarity of intent truly IS up in the air! Very clever.
the best line I like from it is of course- "Oh, don't you know? That's no way to live-" and "And now you'll never succeed if you're so convinced you're defeated" that's true, it absolutely isn't a way to live. Sometimes you need to give yourself the love, forgiveness and permission to treat yourself better. you need to be that person who says you CAN succeed, despite all your doubts and fears.
The more I re-read the lyrics again it almost sounds like an inner demon of the persons mind being cynical and cruel to the listener. Like some nightmare about confiding in your best friends and THIs is what they say to you after you mustered your courage to talk to them. Massive guilt tripping going on here.
Because the remember the line - "I remember when I was that pathetic"- the 'singer' has been through this too. I think this makes the song both awesome and horrifying. Which is fantastic- it's multiple interpretations make it a good re-listen.
I got 4 different scenarios just by listening.
One. An abused person talking to THEIR abuser who treats them awfully and uses their past as an excuse to justify why they repeat history onto their loved ones.
Two. A depressed person has a nightmare about confiding in someone about their situation and this is the tirade their given.
Three, A friend confronts another about their destructive behavior and uses this tough love to snap them out of it.
and finally Four. Yes, an onlooker talking back at some "emo", being all dramatic and emotional and self-defeating, declaring their sorrows in whatever way they can to suck attention pity and sympathy where ever they can get it because they've come to enjoy their misery- and the singer is calling them out on it.
The fact I got all four of these scenes in my head give me such chills. Well done.
Lithiel, I agree there's a lot to take from this song. The fact that there can be so many interpretations, really shows some masterful writing.
Lithiel i might not come up with all 4 scenarios but all the things you said about the lines fit what i think completely, it makes me stopped when the flow of the song is hitting the feels and was like 'eh?' 'Wait, what?' 😂
this may sound slightly weird or it might make sense. but with your first point of not hiding it enough and that's basically calling them an attention seeker, I think of it as that, it's sort of a forbidden subject to talk about and when people do try and talk about it, everyone calls them attention seeking. so I feel like the point is to say that you need to keep it secret, hide it as much as you can otherwise everyone thinks you are doing it for attention. or it would be the opposite where everyone would take pity on you and try to be really empathetic or sympathetic. that is why it has the part about laying the sympathy thick. that's just how I interpret it.
It feels to me largely like a combination of things they tell/told to themselves a lot when they were beating themselves up, and then also speaking to others to essentially say, "try not to dwell on your past, because it will always hold you back if you do." I'm basing some of this conclusion off of the tone of their other music. It doesn't seem to me that this would be meant truly to belittle anyone.
You know what dude some reaches out you help them then ask questions later about who's fault it is. Because they know what it takes to fix it but they obviously feel unable to at the present time they just desperately seeking some comfort and what kind of person would you be not to give a desprate human being some comfort to be able to supply that simple maybe life saving kindness that is so easy given. People first then consequences
This song cuts to deep. My feelings of abandonment and neglect are resurfacing
TFW your parent(s) got messed up by /their/ parents in specific ways that ended up bleeding over onto how they raised you, and so you're both sympathetic but bitter?
Yeah. Took me years to find what this song's lyrics and tone meant to me, but it's that.
And remember: they don't have to be outright abusive. No person is without flaws or mistakes, and with a parent that can be all it takes to fuck up a kid. You can have a loving relationship with your parents and still be upset and angry by the times they've hurt you. Whatever happened, your feelings are valid
Yep. My dad had abusive parents and talks about how bad they are yet he’s been mentally and used to be physically abusive to me everyday for my whole life
@@Harajukubarbie333 Really sorry to hear that. Glad you're here and standing strong though. Go forth and break the cycle, I'm rooting for you!
for those of you who haven't read the warriors series..
Nameless & Faceless
Did u come from the MAP too? Lol
Yes breezepelt
Not everyone seems to understand that we do try everything in our power to help ourselves and be strong!! It isn’t easy, especially when you have nowhere to physically go and you’re legally not allowed to leave!!
Stay strong everyone💕 you aren’t alone and I’m proud of you for making it this far, don’t give up!
Like I feel like this song would apply more if there weren’t people still currently going through abuse. It’s easy to look back on the past and move on but it’s harder to move on if it’s still the present
I feel like this song would be good for a scenario where a villain is comforting a depressed yet angry child. The lyrics slightly cruel or mean. But they are also comforting.
Finally a song in this genre about finding strength and moving on, rather than wallowing in being hurt and being a victim.
Even if they used "tough love".
this is at the people who think they're the only people with abusive parents and brush off every other accounts of abusive parenting
I'm speechless and all wet because of the tears to be honest... This song should really be more known, so when we are in that victim stage of struggle we have some motivation, but this was not my point. Well, to begin with, I am already aware of the situations I have to face in life, we all should be, and it's easier now that I feel bigger than this, like beating those "enabling barriers" and I recognise this in an amazing process of learning and growing as a person, but sometimes I just wonder how everything would be if we all didn't need to waste so many sleepless nights crying over problems that just become bigger and bigger until they flood our minds, to blame ourselves for things we cannot control and wasting time not letting go of them, to feel so bad for the "normal" childhood we could have had, for when your older brother doesn't want to play with you, just ignoring, and is so easily provoked because parents had already given an example of what a healthy life shouldn't be like, for when life distances you from your old old childhood friends and it marks you forever for some reason, for a family that just argues over and over again... yeah, gone too personal. Anyway, I'm still breathing, and the only ones who can change this reality now are *us*, make sure you live enough to take on this mission of hope, make sure you try again and again.
i agree
Same here
“I remember when I was that pathetic.”
I wish I discovered this when it came out. It would have been great for me at the time. I needed the tough love to get through and move on
I think this song deals with depression in an original but healthy way. Yeah, some might feel attacked or whatever... But the thing with depression that no ones ever talk about is that sometimes when you're used to deal with it, you just settle in that state, find some comfort in being a victim that everyone should pity and care about and try to help, you like staying focused on your miserable state and repeating how it's your parents, the other kids at school and everyone else's fault. While that might probably true, it quickly becomes an unhealthy spiral of self hate/harm and pity, and you end up being obsessed with your pain and problems and thinking the world is shitty for not coming up to you and tell you how they are sorry for you and how you are a martyr that everyone should kind of "respect" and acknowledge. All of this because, no offense, but depression is actually an egocentric problem, where you just stare at your past and scars and hate youself and inflict yourself mental suffering.
What I like with this song is that it tries to make you stop focusing on yourself and tells you that others know what this is too, and yeah poor you life has been shitty, but damn all that pain is not a way to live. Yes if you stay obsessed with the past, the only thing you're going to do is repeat it. You're so conviced you're defeated that you make that true. While you sit and think of how worthless you are, you let yourself just be a ball of angst and that's it. No going forward, no comfort except by cutting. Hooray that's great, you're stuck with depression and you're doing nothing to help yourself. Because yes, you can accuse others for being all responsible and uncompassionate, but the only one who can decide that this is it, you're gonna heal and have the future you want is you. People's lives shouldn't be defined by whatt happens to them, but by what they do, how they deal. We all have our struggles, and yeah just saying "oh no this is too much for me, why is life so unfair, why are people so horrible, I should die" is pathetic. It's pathetic and we should fight against that, instead of just writing everywhere in the RUclips comments how bad our life is to attract attention and pity.
Now of course it's hard, and a little help from others can mean a lot, but in the end, we are the only leaders of our lives, and we only can decide that we will fight for ourselves. Life is unfair, some people are horrible, but that's normal, we just need to accept what is and what has been done and move forward. It's useless to fight the past, the only thing that can be changed is ourselves.
To me, when you realize that, when you're fed up with your self pity, it's a first step towards healing. That's why I like this song, a person who was depressed but fought against it telling another one stuck in their pain to get over it : this just fills me with hope.
I dont rlly like the people that go and complain in the comments, looking for the pity of others. I like how you explained everything, its naturally true and helpful in a way. Thanks, this has made someones day and may make another's soon.
That way of thinking i.e. "You have a problem. Why just get over it. I'm sure it's super easy." will push people just as much depper into depression as coddling them will.
hey, I get it. give me a little credit
This song got me so much. I was abused in every sense as a child(mental/emotional,and sexual), I was bullied severely, I was r@ped at 16 by a guy I trusted, I have self harmed from the time I was 10, I have been in multiple abusive relationships, lost the majority of my family in very traumatic ways, was an alcoholic before I even reached high school, suffered from eating disorders, etc. and for the longest time I let the pain and suffering I felt control and define me. This song is a great reminder that that kind of thing doesn’t excuse any actions, your past suffering does not define who you are. No amount of scars (mental or physical) is an excuse to beg for pity or attention. It’s not an excuse to hurt others, or push the blame away. Life is shit sometimes, but if you wallow in it you just become the kind of person you yourself hate. Don’t allow your suffering to pass to other people.
Ariel gives me this almost motherly vibe when she sings, it's like she's speaking directly to me, comforting, and saying it's alright. Usually what a mom does to her young while rocking them to sleep.
I always interpreted the lyrics "wear you scars on your sleeve, for all the world to see like 'look what they did to me quick, lay on the sympathy thick" as a play on "wearing your heart on your sleeve" so the scenario I see is more like telling everyone who will listen about your past trauma so you'll get the sympathy (/pity) that someone whose hurting craves
but after moving past that stage in the healing process you realize how detrimental it was to your own mental health and the people around you. and that it's better to leave the past the past and work on rebuilding yourself
As someone who has dealt with self harm I interpreted it as references SH and honestly it makes me like the song less because of the attention seeking stereotype.
I never saw this song as calling out the victims to get over it and move on but rather a passionate call to action like I know how you're feeling and WE deserve better than to stay living like this
Even when I cant really relate, I just love how the song not only tells you how its okay to feel the way you do but it ALSO tells you that go around feeling pitty for yourself isnt the solution to your problem. Its okay to feel bad, you surely have your reasons, but dont let it control you.
Not related to the song itself, but that has got to be the best imovie editing I’ve ever seen.
I always listen to this kind of music, and there's so many people talking about everything they've been through, and I feel really bad for them :( And I wish I could do something to help them, but I can't, since my parents have never abused me (unless mental abuse counts...) So, for every person who feels bad for some reason: I'm here! :D
KC
Emotional and mental abuse is still abuse. The scars in your head are still scars.
Damn, that's deep...
Well, one of my catchphrases is 'scars will heal, but were meant to bleed' so... still, thanks :)
It actually took me quite a while to realise that it didn't have to be physical to be bad. Mental 'wounds' can be just as bad or worse if you don't 'nurse' them.
Emotional/mental abuse is still abuse, and arguably can have an even greater effect than physical abuse for many in the long run. Mental trauma takes much, much more work to heal than physical trauma does.
Thank you
Damn this makes me feel called out. Often I feel the need to make the world know I hurt on the inside. I enjoy the scars on my arm, I feel like lashing out and hurting myself all the time partly because it distracts, but I also recognize that I enjoy the feeling of being validated that I have problems. I like going to the hospital and feeling like I’m sick enough to be there. I always want to be sicker to prove something to someone.
Today is just an icon for hire day. I've been up since 4 am since i couldn't stay asleep. I've been listening to icon for hire all day and it's AMAZING
I have bad anxiety I've been abused and bullied but for some reason I feel much calmer listening to this song I think it's because the band understands what it's like
This song hit me really hard
Specially the part when it says *¨Wear my scars on my sleeve for all the world to see"* because when I was more young I used to do that so people paid attention to me or felt sorry for me, yeah, just like the song, _I remember when I was that pathetic_
I came here from a MAP by Eucalyptus Splash
same!!
me too
same :4
Same
So did I.
This song resonates with me. Up until last year I had a terrible relationship with my mum. I spent so long feeling shit. And we've fixed it up a lot more now with a few blips here and there. And this is like my reminder not to hang onto the past and keep it as my sob story that I tell people, but more to move on and enjoy my life and work around the issues.
Tbh, when I clicked on this, I thought it was about murder, but now its better!
same
I love how I feel so attacked and get so disgusted about myself everytime I listen to this song :D