“I don’t want a valuable life lesson, I just want an ice cream” is cited by my little brother every time his ice cream melts, and my parents won’t buy him another one. Pretty sure he will never learn.
I feel like it highly comes down to knowing your kids. Bandit knows his girls, and can recognize when it has indeed sunk in for them. So gave them a chance to prove they've learned. It doesn't apply to every kid and every situation, but it was the right call for his kids in that situation.
Right! Parenting can’t be put in a manual because it’s highly circumstantial and some methods differ depending on the parent giving it and the child receiving it.
LOL we were watching this episode this morning and were joking that this would make a great tshirt or embroidery pattern. "I don't want a valuable life lesson! I want an ice cream!"
I never saw the issue on Bandit giving his ice cream. All the time that they were dancing around letting their ice cream melt he was enjoying his. So he let them know it was on them, did not re buy another ice cream, he just gave an example on sharing, which the girls were not happy to do all episode util they saw their dad actions. If it was a second occurrence, yes he could have been more strict, but I think his reaction was great and he did get to enjoy his ice cream before giving it away.
Plus, he had the large size, and had said originally he didn't want icecream. So he'd probably eaten a bit before giving it to them. and also they learn what it means to sacrifice your own enjoyment to give to others.
I think what the dad did was really nice. I feel like every time a parent goes out of their way to be nice to their child, it’s seen by some as “spoiling” or “coddling”
A good example of this too is Stripe getting Muffin an ice cream earlier in the episode. He sure does spoil her, but in this instance it wasn't Completely spoiling. We don't even see her ask (demand) her dad to get her an ice cream at all like the girls do, she gets one 'because she had a dinosaur stuck on her head', which is flimsy at best, but he's a dad who loves to give his kids gifts when he takes em out for a daddy/daughter day, and give them consolation when it doesn't go 100%.
@@kaykay8855 She's still a little spoiled at 14, in Camping when its revealed she still has trouble sharing some of Her things with Bluey, even if it's borrowing.
@@JustAGirlOnline there’s a difference between being spoiled and not wanting to share a the moment. When 14 year old Muffin shouted about the book, it didn’t sound like Bluey asked Muffin for her book.
One lesson he also taught them was that even when life is not fair their dad will still be there for them. As so many adults washing the show to heal from their own childhood trauma no, life is not fair, and no matter what happens, their family will not be there to help them in any way. The girls did still get a taste of that lesson, and their chosen flavors were gone. They also showed through their follow-up actions that they did learn. If they hadn't done this then their dad would know next time when life isn't fair he needs to let them fall. Dad is a good example of adjusting on the fly based on your own children
“Ragdoll” is kind of similar in that they want to get ice cream in that one, too, but the message is about teaching kids that hard work pays off. I think that would be a good one to cover.
She says LIME lesson, which is adorable ♡ Also, bandit didn't even attempt to help them find a solution (like lending them his spoon so they can see how much eachother is taking. Or suggesting they just give eachother the cones fully) He let them do their thing, get their lime lesson. And then lead by example by sharing.
There’s a quote from a book I read whenever someone said something isn’t fair. The character would say “fair’s are for cotton candy and judging pigs” and I laughed! That is so clever! Every time Bluey kept saying “that’s not fair”, I immediately thought of this quote.
Muffin going toe to toe with that other grouchy granny was the funniest bit in Bluey. If I could go back in time and watch that for the first time again I would. 😂
Bandit giving them his icecream is modeling selflessness AND giving them an opportunity to immediately practice the valuable "lime" lesson they just learned. THAT is how good behaviors stick.
I think it also takes into account that they have lost their specific flavor of ice cream as well. The flavors were what started the debacle in the first place. Yes, dad kindly gives his to the girls, but it isn't the flavor that either had prior. To me, this reinforces appreciation for what you have rather than coveting what someone else has, because this way they still have ice cream even though the flavor isn't their first choice.
I like that Bandit showed his daughters compassion. My parents would have taken the 'too bad, toughen up' approach. 😂 I think the girls already learnt their lesson. There was no reason to kick them while they were down. They'll never forget their Dad's kindness.
the lick issue is a prisoners dilemma.... the typical prisoner's dilemma is set up in such a way that both parties choose to protect themselves at the expense of the other participant. As a result, both participants find themselves in a worse state than if they had cooperated with each other in the decision-making process. the result with bluey and bingo fighting over ice cream was that the ice cream melted. I think bandit gave the ice cream because he saw that the lesson was learned after bluey said ¨so we get nothing?¨ both options are good calls because with option 1 they learn the lesson as a result of not getting anything (the sun melts ice creams) and with option 2 they learn the lesson and have a chance to redeem themselves (ok you can have mine) by not making the same mistake again in the future.
I think Bandit does a good job of telling them like yeah hot days melt ice cream I am teaching you that because you didn't eat it fast enough it melted but you shouldn't be punished for not making that connection because you're kids. Sometimes what seems obvious to adults is mind boggling for kids and sure maybe after the second time if this happened you should have some semblance of an idea that those are the natural consequences. Sometimes consequences can be taught the first time and other times it takes a few tries. It all depends on how steadfast you want to be as a parent and your child. We have open conversations about most consequences in our household because I want my kiddo to know the why, the how, the what, and the when of the actions that led to them.
The way I see it, Bandit was giving them his ice cream as a secret test. If they learned their lesson, he would have likely taken the ice cream back, but since they did, Bandit allows them to keep it.
Just thinking, from yet another perspective, Bandit had a win (other than happy daughters sharing) out of the situation too. He had an easy opportunity to correct his weak moment of failed resisting the temptation of the ice ceam in the first place. And somehow the girls still learned that sun melt icecream. They were sad when it was gone, they felt the feeling. They could still remember it next time. (In theory at least. These kiddy frontal lobes are not exactly the most reliable entities 😅)
.... man, I've done that too. Be like.... I shouldn't be eating another icecream/bag of chips/etc. anyway. I'll let them have it since they asked nicely.
I just just finished reading Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer and it concludes on a metaphor of one bowl and one spoon for the whole world, the bowl is the world and it has enough for everyone, but there is just one spoon to pass to the next person and when the bowl is empty there is no more. Resonant
I like that he gave them the ice cream, they had already realised the consequences of their actions and were sad, and he gave them a second chance. If giving them his ice cream had resulted in another argument where it was clear they had not learnt, he probably wouldn't bail them out again.
I'd love for you to therapize Copycat, Army, Kids, Granny Mobile or Teasing (they have more stuff in them that a therapist could discuss) although one of my favorite episodes is Octopus (because I relate to the dad in that one lol) 💙
I think a good compromise at the end would have been for Bandit to offer to share his ice cream with them instead of giving it to them. All three of them could have taken turns instead of just the two girls. That would still be modeling selflessness, but he still would have gotten his own treat, and the girls still would have had to make do with just a third of the cup.
It is SO satisfying to see Bandit as a parent. The show doesn't make him out to be a bad person for not wanting to get ice cream for Bluey and Bingo, in fact it's very relatable and understandable why he wouldn't. This series really understands what parenting can be like, it's lovely 💙
I think sharing the ice cream was a good way to go if only for the fact that his kids didn't demand his ice cream be shared out of obligation and fairness.
My parents were a bit more on the tough love side of things, and as a both my brother and I were sensitive kids, those "life lessons" taught us more than the natural consequences. They also taught us what it was to feel alone and sad, and that when we were feeling that way, we couldn't go to our parents for comfort. We're middle aged now and we still seek comfort from each other more than our parents... But yeah. There were some unhealthy comfort seeking behaviors for both of us when we were teenagers/in our 20s. I like Bandit's approach. He doesn't rescue them (like buying more ice cream), and he's kind to them in their moment of despair.
The critique about Bandit "Coddling" the girls at the end is the same critique people have about The Sign. People are so upset when a Kids show doesn't show the "gritty reality" of life. But Calypso says in The Sign that life has enough sad endings, so we need the happy endings from our stories.
I would've done something in between. I would've eaten my ice cream and shared bites with them. That way they get the natural consequence AND get to have a little too. Plus the modeling of sharing
I think he did the best option for his kids. They still learned the lesson of ice cream melting in the sun, but he did indeed model selfless behavior by giving up his and therefore they shared properly, so the lesson was a big success.
My mom had a genius way to solve the "fairness" issue between my brother and I. One of us got to cut the cake piece on half and the other one got to pick which plate they wanted first. Perfectly even every time guaranteed.
I had a professor once say “fair isn’t everyone getting the same thing, it’s everyone getting what they need.” It’s something that comes up a lot as a special ed teacher.
I think Bandit had the best call for how young they are. It's true your parents can't always bail you out, but there is a reason why minors are judged differently and less harshly than people of legal age. This is still fine, for now. Slowly but steadily teach them. Bandit still have some time.
another good ep to therapize would be ¨the decider¨ from season 3 since it has the underlining theme of divorce and how to handle making a very tough decision.
As far as learning their lime lesson goes, it makes sense specifically for Bandit to share his ice cream to eat because he DID say he wanted to stay in shape. Plus he's the type of father that tries figure out WHY you're misbehaving BEFORE he has to dish out any punishments. So he figured he'd share with Bluey and Bingo and they'd learn by example how valuable sharing can be.
The way I see it with the situation at the end, you have to ask yourself which lesson you want to teach. It's like when you have toddlers helping with chores-is it so you can have a clean house (not likely), or is it to teach them the habit? In this case, Bandit had to decide whether it was more important to teach them that you don't always get what you want or to teach them to share. Also, I just realized that Bluey and Bingo might not realize that he followed them during the whole dance, because they found him sitting on the bench. 😂
I think dad made the best choice, cause he told them straight out that this was how it went and how they got there and that they were at fault themselves. He told them they wouldn't get a new ice cream and let that sink in for a bit for them to learn. Then gave them his ice cream, which was not the one they had ordered themselves but they were happy and had learned from it. As you said paying forward the kindness. So he showed them what the consequence could've been and how it felt for a little bit, and giving them a chance to try again, and they succeeded this time.
I feel the “life lesson” would’ve been ruined if he actually bought them new ice creams. However he sacrificed his to show them a new life lesson. Sharing, which they struggled with and was the cause of their melted ice creams. So bandit did a good job of explaining consequences and also learning to share and not be greedy.
I’m also on the fence about Bandit giving up his ice cream, but by doing so, Bandit gives his kids an example of kindness and grace - his looking into their bowl to make sure they have enough - and Bluey and Bingo immediately agree to take turns with the ice cream spoon. Not only did they get a valuable life lesson, but they also internalized it. Other episodes that have somewhat similar concepts of fairness are “Magic Claw” and “Pass the Parcel” which I think are worth checking out
I think Bandit makes the right call and it is consistent with his parenting style. He focuses on positive response. The kids will learn the lesson better that dad shared his ice cream after they messed up, rather than possibly resenting that they tried to make things fair, and tried to share. They could easily mistakenly take the lesson of "Don't try to share" rather than "Don't be obsessed with fairness"
I haven't checked yet to see all of the episodes you've covered ... this is the 3rd one I've watched. If you haven't done Hammerbarn yet that's a good one about being happy with what you've got rather than comparing what you have to what others have.
If it was me, I would've shared some of mine but not given it all. But I also would've intervened during the melting phase earlier to warn them about the potential issue. And I probably would've offered them my spoon to use to try each others' flavors to begin with.
I have made my husband shirts that say “big daddy man” and “I don’t want a valuable lime lesson, I just want ice cream” with related pics on them and he loves them so much 😂
I think it depends heavily on the age of the child(ren) in question, and who they are as people. Some kids, like Bluey and Bingo, are pretty sensitive and thoughtful, so the situation hits them harder/differently. You can hear Bluey, especially, is near tears, but also trying to accept the situation. She feels truly hurt that her own actions, however unforseen, have led to such deep disappointment, but she also knows that Bandit isn't going to change his mind, so she's trying to navigate living in her deep sadness. I know other kids, especially once they get older, who will get angry about being told no instead of disappointed that they were their own downfall, and they see the parent as the problem, not their own behavior. In Bluey's case, she already got consequences to her actions - the deep sadness of loss and recognizing that she made her own problem and is now stuck in the consequences. Bandit let's her be in that sadness for a minute and understand why she's in that situation, and then he helps her out of it, affirming himself to his kids as someone who will help them with their problems. If Bluey instead had started blaming Bandit (or even Bingo) for her loss and demanding that her ice cream be replaced, I'd say it would be more appropriate to hold firm on the no ice cream. Because at that point she's not recognizing that her actions were the catalyst to her problem. Some young children won't be able to understand that concept, while most older children can, which is why age as well as general self awareness/sensitivity are important to consider, especially if the child is known for taking perceived failures hard (ie if Bluey was going to turn the loss into an internal monolog of "I'm the worst, I'm a screw up, I'm so irresponsible"), or if the child has a trauma history that might by triggered by the denial of replacement (for example, children who have a history of food deprivation as punishment). Lots of factors to consider.
I think what bandit did was the right call, because it didn’t mean that they were able to pick their ice cream favors. They still got consequences because now they got a flavor that they didn’t want. But it’s also minimized for them, so that the ice cream doesn’t ruin their entire trip. i’m not a parent though, and I do think both has merit as he said.
Can you please react to "the sign" it's a longer episode at the end of season three and I think it could be fun to talk about making big life choices in relationships
It depends on the situation if giving the ice cream (or other desired thing) is the right decision. In this case, yes, because Bandit was fairly certain that Bingo and Bluey would learn from their valuable life lesson, even if they did just want an ice cream. But if this had been Muffin and Stripe, sticking to no more ice cream for you would have been right because Muffin would have just taken the sweets and been on with her day
When I was a kid my mom had to learn to stop using the word “promise” because I have a wicked memory and if she promised to buy me an ice cream “next time” I would remember, even if next time was months later. She had to switch to “maybe next time.” And if I asked if she promised she would say no, she isn’t promising but if I’m good she’ll try. Because it’s important to keep your promises. I’ve carried that through to my life too I will not promise to do something unless I 100% know I can follow through. I was a little like eeeeerrrrr when Bingo said “it’s actually your job to give us your ice cream.” I felt that was dipping into entitled language and Bandit should have probably told her “it’s my job to ensure you learn how to share your ice cream.” Buuuut the episodes are only 7 minutes after all.
I think it depends on the kid. But on the real, life will always be teaching you lessons about compromise, self regulation, accountability, etc. Do ‘em a sweetness and maybe, when those lessons come down hard on them one day, they’ll remember it won’t always be too bad. Sometimes you still get an ice cream at the end. This also feels like a lesson for Bandit! “not everything has to be a lesson” lesson 🎉
I do think what was done here is the right choice considering what the girls went through and it shows what they learned. It would be interesting to compare this episode with somehting like The Claw, which also makes mention of things being unfair.
I think the kids learned the ice cream lesson of dither too long and it’ll melt and you get nothing is a good ice cream based lesson, then to see them share with each other without squabbling is a reward beyond chocolate ice cream
I agree with you Johnathan, and that what's tricky as there's multiple teachings to learn from. Personally i would of warned them that the ice creams are melting and to share or not share. If they chose not to eat & lose them, then I would probably say, I'm sorry that you lost your ice creams and that's hard. I might chose to share none of mine, or give a little to each in their cones. Depending on the situation at the time.
I also find muffin and stripe interesting in this episode, i think sometimes its easy to forget that how your parent your own kid can impact the other parents and kids around us, Stripe is very indulgent with Muffin which on one hand shes 3 so I do get it and I don't think shes a bad kid, but him caving to her so much was noticed by Bluey and Bingo and tbh they pushed their luck in this episode a lot more than I think they usually would because they saw how Stripe responded to her. Sometimes when out with multiple kids for an afternoon like that its smart to decide on a united front with the other parent and explain to your kid beforehand how the days going to go if it will be different from how you might be if it were just the two of you to avoid these kinds of situations
I’d say he made the good call for his specific kids, as he might’ve known they’d likely follow his example of sharing and take take in the lesson. Either way would’ve been good but also Bandit might’ve thought about his initial thought of skipping the ice cream anyway pushing an adult towards giving in lol
I think it is situational. I think he gave them the ice cream for multiple reasons. They were trying to share, and he really didn't want it to begin with... but gave in to a craving. The girls are young, and they have plenty of time for natural consequence lessons ... and mostly, he just wanted to enjoy the time with his girls. It is shown that Bandit goes on work trips... sometimes long ones. So, giving in to their wants and just sitting in the park to have quality time is just going to give his girls the special dad time memories that get them through the times when he's away.... and Chili so much needed time alone.
Just like you, I think there's room for both, and you have to pick what moment you want to employ each strategy. Though I will always be in favor of instilling mercy, compassion and sharing in other people over letting them suffer. Just in general.
I love Bandit and Chilly’s parenting. I think I would have done the same though. Although I only have one kid, so I’m not privy to the back and forth chaos. I think bandit also did the right thing becuase he really is trying to stay in shape 😂
My 4 year old is deep in the "it's not fair" phase. But it's usually about totally normal things. Like gravity. It's sometimes funny, but largely exhausting. 🙃
If the kids had expected Dad to share his ice cream, then sharing it would have been the wrong call. But since they weren't insisting on it, I think sharing was fine.
I think in a way, dad did both options. He said no first, let them feel the weight and reality of that consequence, and them realizing they could have done it differently, and wishing they had. Then get option two, and see the benefits there too and then emulate generosity with each other! As a nanny of 2 boys, this scene has played out many times for me! How i play it also largely depends on their attitudes at the time!
I would love if you got the chance to react to "The Sign" episode. It was so controversial on whether or not Bandit didn't allow his kids to learn the way life operates, or that moving is necessary for financial reasons sometimes, whenever he backed out of selling their home for the happiness of his family. I totally get that take, but i also think sometimes that take has caused parents to fall victim to always considering financial discomfort (obviously they lived comfortably, but most people in the world would oot for living lavishly- if given the chance) as seniority over emotional and other discomforts for their kids and spouse.
2:184:545:05 thoroughly enjoying these Bluey episodes because Jono is #relate chuckling. He's so charmed by these fictional characters and it just comes to show how much he loves children and is great with them!
I probably would have shared my ice cream... not given it to them fully. Because then I could still be using it as a lesson in sharing and they also see that, even as a parent, I'm a human too who also deserves ice cream. That's the one thing I think that it feels like the episode of Bluey left out. It's great for parents to sacrifice but children also need to learn that a parent is still a human too and deserves treats and respect as well.
I'd ask the children *what* the valuable life lesson they learned from the experience and depending on the answers they give I share my ice cream instead of just giving it up to them. It's an extra large there's enough for all three, but that would only be a one time thing and I'd be sure to tell them so.
I've done both. I've given up my icecream/thing but I've also immediately after seeing theirs was gone and they start to turn to look at me I shove mine all the way in my mouth as fast as I can, like.... mmphphhhfff?? Oh no, sorry, I ate mine. Yours is gone, too bad, eh? You gotta be more careful, you dropped it, now it's gone.
“I don’t want a valuable life lesson, I just want an ice cream” is cited by my little brother every time his ice cream melts, and my parents won’t buy him another one. Pretty sure he will never learn.
Show him the episode
Well at least he was honest 😅😂
I feel like it highly comes down to knowing your kids. Bandit knows his girls, and can recognize when it has indeed sunk in for them. So gave them a chance to prove they've learned. It doesn't apply to every kid and every situation, but it was the right call for his kids in that situation.
Right! Parenting can’t be put in a manual because it’s highly circumstantial and some methods differ depending on the parent giving it and the child receiving it.
"I don't want a valuable life lesson!" is super quoted by the fandom haha and for good reason, it's so funny 😂
LOL we were watching this episode this morning and were joking that this would make a great tshirt or embroidery pattern. "I don't want a valuable life lesson! I want an ice cream!"
I never saw the issue on Bandit giving his ice cream. All the time that they were dancing around letting their ice cream melt he was enjoying his. So he let them know it was on them, did not re buy another ice cream, he just gave an example on sharing, which the girls were not happy to do all episode util they saw their dad actions. If it was a second occurrence, yes he could have been more strict, but I think his reaction was great and he did get to enjoy his ice cream before giving it away.
Plus, he had the large size, and had said originally he didn't want icecream.
So he'd probably eaten a bit before giving it to them. and also they learn what it means to sacrifice your own enjoyment to give to others.
I think what the dad did was really nice. I feel like every time a parent goes out of their way to be nice to their child, it’s seen by some as “spoiling” or “coddling”
A good example of this too is Stripe getting Muffin an ice cream earlier in the episode. He sure does spoil her, but in this instance it wasn't Completely spoiling.
We don't even see her ask (demand) her dad to get her an ice cream at all like the girls do, she gets one 'because she had a dinosaur stuck on her head', which is flimsy at best, but he's a dad who loves to give his kids gifts when he takes em out for a daddy/daughter day, and give them consolation when it doesn't go 100%.
@@JustAGirlOnlineI wouldn’t call Stripe’s parenting spoiling, Muffin is three.
@@kaykay8855 She's still a little spoiled at 14, in Camping when its revealed she still has trouble sharing some of Her things with Bluey, even if it's borrowing.
@@JustAGirlOnline there’s a difference between being spoiled and not wanting to share a the moment. When 14 year old Muffin shouted about the book, it didn’t sound like Bluey asked Muffin for her book.
@@kaykay8855 And that's spoiled behavior.
One lesson he also taught them was that even when life is not fair their dad will still be there for them. As so many adults washing the show to heal from their own childhood trauma no, life is not fair, and no matter what happens, their family will not be there to help them in any way. The girls did still get a taste of that lesson, and their chosen flavors were gone. They also showed through their follow-up actions that they did learn. If they hadn't done this then their dad would know next time when life isn't fair he needs to let them fall. Dad is a good example of adjusting on the fly based on your own children
Huh. I never saw the message of selflessness with Bandit giving the girls his ice cream. What a wholesome and healthy interpretation
“Ragdoll” is kind of similar in that they want to get ice cream in that one, too, but the message is about teaching kids that hard work pays off. I think that would be a good one to cover.
It’s also an interesting episode to explore whether Bandit’s strategy is a fair way to teach about hard work
I especially love Wendy in this episode... She's iconic there, and a nice character overall
@@hallonsylt6225 "Stand back, kids. You're about to see what ten years of pilates can do."
She says LIME lesson, which is adorable ♡
Also, bandit didn't even attempt to help them find a solution (like lending them his spoon so they can see how much eachother is taking. Or suggesting they just give eachother the cones fully)
He let them do their thing, get their lime lesson. And then lead by example by sharing.
I think modeling kindness and forgiveness and sharing is the best thing for a parent to do, so I would have given them my chocolate ice cream 🙂
There’s a quote from a book I read whenever someone said something isn’t fair. The character would say “fair’s are for cotton candy and judging pigs” and I laughed! That is so clever!
Every time Bluey kept saying “that’s not fair”, I immediately thought of this quote.
Please do Granny Mobile! It's great to let kids stand up for themselves.
I loved the granny vs granny battle 😂
Muffin is a precious bean 🥰
Yes!! I love that episode!!
Muffin going toe to toe with that other grouchy granny was the funniest bit in Bluey. If I could go back in time and watch that for the first time again I would. 😂
One of my favorite episodes! Muffin is a great grouchy granny lol
Bandit giving them his icecream is modeling selflessness AND giving them an opportunity to immediately practice the valuable "lime" lesson they just learned. THAT is how good behaviors stick.
I think it also takes into account that they have lost their specific flavor of ice cream as well. The flavors were what started the debacle in the first place. Yes, dad kindly gives his to the girls, but it isn't the flavor that either had prior. To me, this reinforces appreciation for what you have rather than coveting what someone else has, because this way they still have ice cream even though the flavor isn't their first choice.
I like that Bandit showed his daughters compassion. My parents would have taken the 'too bad, toughen up' approach. 😂
I think the girls already learnt their lesson. There was no reason to kick them while they were down. They'll never forget their Dad's kindness.
the lick issue is a prisoners dilemma.... the typical prisoner's dilemma is set up in such a way that both parties choose to protect themselves at the expense of the other participant. As a result, both participants find themselves in a worse state than if they had cooperated with each other in the decision-making process. the result with bluey and bingo fighting over ice cream was that the ice cream melted. I think bandit gave the ice cream because he saw that the lesson was learned after bluey said ¨so we get nothing?¨ both options are good calls because with option 1 they learn the lesson as a result of not getting anything (the sun melts ice creams) and with option 2 they learn the lesson and have a chance to redeem themselves (ok you can have mine) by not making the same mistake again in the future.
I think Bandit does a good job of telling them like yeah hot days melt ice cream I am teaching you that because you didn't eat it fast enough it melted but you shouldn't be punished for not making that connection because you're kids. Sometimes what seems obvious to adults is mind boggling for kids and sure maybe after the second time if this happened you should have some semblance of an idea that those are the natural consequences.
Sometimes consequences can be taught the first time and other times it takes a few tries. It all depends on how steadfast you want to be as a parent and your child.
We have open conversations about most consequences in our household because I want my kiddo to know the why, the how, the what, and the when of the actions that led to them.
With subtitles, I think I heard that Bluey says "lime" instead of "life lesson" or something like that, adorable
The way I see it, Bandit was giving them his ice cream as a secret test. If they learned their lesson, he would have likely taken the ice cream back, but since they did, Bandit allows them to keep it.
Just thinking, from yet another perspective, Bandit had a win (other than happy daughters sharing) out of the situation too. He had an easy opportunity to correct his weak moment of failed resisting the temptation of the ice ceam in the first place.
And somehow the girls still learned that sun melt icecream. They were sad when it was gone, they felt the feeling. They could still remember it next time. (In theory at least. These kiddy frontal lobes are not exactly the most reliable entities 😅)
.... man, I've done that too. Be like.... I shouldn't be eating another icecream/bag of chips/etc. anyway. I'll let them have it since they asked nicely.
As kids we all had that phase where we would say something’s unfair whenever we don’t get our way lol
“I don’t want a valuable life lesson! I just want an ice cream!” That is now my go-to quote to say whenever we get ice cream, LOL.
I just just finished reading Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer and it concludes on a metaphor of one bowl and one spoon for the whole world, the bowl is the world and it has enough for everyone, but there is just one spoon to pass to the next person and when the bowl is empty there is no more. Resonant
I like that he gave them the ice cream, they had already realised the consequences of their actions and were sad, and he gave them a second chance. If giving them his ice cream had resulted in another argument where it was clear they had not learnt, he probably wouldn't bail them out again.
I'd love for you to therapize Copycat, Army, Kids, Granny Mobile or Teasing (they have more stuff in them that a therapist could discuss) although one of my favorite episodes is Octopus (because I relate to the dad in that one lol) 💙
I think a good compromise at the end would have been for Bandit to offer to share his ice cream with them instead of giving it to them. All three of them could have taken turns instead of just the two girls. That would still be modeling selflessness, but he still would have gotten his own treat, and the girls still would have had to make do with just a third of the cup.
It is SO satisfying to see Bandit as a parent. The show doesn't make him out to be a bad person for not wanting to get ice cream for Bluey and Bingo, in fact it's very relatable and understandable why he wouldn't.
This series really understands what parenting can be like, it's lovely 💙
Today's episode of Bluey is called *"FAIR."* Bandit gave a great lesson in what fairness is! Princess Bride level!
I think sharing the ice cream was a good way to go if only for the fact that his kids didn't demand his ice cream be shared out of obligation and fairness.
I like how the fact that they are dogs actually factors in how they behave.
My parents were a bit more on the tough love side of things, and as a both my brother and I were sensitive kids, those "life lessons" taught us more than the natural consequences. They also taught us what it was to feel alone and sad, and that when we were feeling that way, we couldn't go to our parents for comfort. We're middle aged now and we still seek comfort from each other more than our parents... But yeah. There were some unhealthy comfort seeking behaviors for both of us when we were teenagers/in our 20s. I like Bandit's approach. He doesn't rescue them (like buying more ice cream), and he's kind to them in their moment of despair.
The critique about Bandit "Coddling" the girls at the end is the same critique people have about The Sign. People are so upset when a Kids show doesn't show the "gritty reality" of life. But Calypso says in The Sign that life has enough sad endings, so we need the happy endings from our stories.
I would've done something in between. I would've eaten my ice cream and shared bites with them. That way they get the natural consequence AND get to have a little too. Plus the modeling of sharing
I think he did the best option for his kids. They still learned the lesson of ice cream melting in the sun, but he did indeed model selfless behavior by giving up his and therefore they shared properly, so the lesson was a big success.
My mom had a genius way to solve the "fairness" issue between my brother and I. One of us got to cut the cake piece on half and the other one got to pick which plate they wanted first. Perfectly even every time guaranteed.
I had a professor once say “fair isn’t everyone getting the same thing, it’s everyone getting what they need.” It’s something that comes up a lot as a special ed teacher.
I think Bandit had the best call for how young they are. It's true your parents can't always bail you out, but there is a reason why minors are judged differently and less harshly than people of legal age.
This is still fine, for now. Slowly but steadily teach them. Bandit still have some time.
another good ep to therapize would be ¨the decider¨ from season 3 since it has the underlining theme of divorce and how to handle making a very tough decision.
As far as learning their lime lesson goes, it makes sense specifically for Bandit to share his ice cream to eat because he DID say he wanted to stay in shape. Plus he's the type of father that tries figure out WHY you're misbehaving BEFORE he has to dish out any punishments. So he figured he'd share with Bluey and Bingo and they'd learn by example how valuable sharing can be.
Surely there aren’t people who would say, “Why wouldn’t a parent buy their kid ice cream?”
I don’t even have kids and I can think of several reasons!
The way I see it with the situation at the end, you have to ask yourself which lesson you want to teach. It's like when you have toddlers helping with chores-is it so you can have a clean house (not likely), or is it to teach them the habit? In this case, Bandit had to decide whether it was more important to teach them that you don't always get what you want or to teach them to share.
Also, I just realized that Bluey and Bingo might not realize that he followed them during the whole dance, because they found him sitting on the bench. 😂
One thing to think about is you don't have only one chance for lessons like this. You can choose one one day and choose the other the next!
I think dad made the best choice, cause he told them straight out that this was how it went and how they got there and that they were at fault themselves. He told them they wouldn't get a new ice cream and let that sink in for a bit for them to learn. Then gave them his ice cream, which was not the one they had ordered themselves but they were happy and had learned from it. As you said paying forward the kindness. So he showed them what the consequence could've been and how it felt for a little bit, and giving them a chance to try again, and they succeeded this time.
I feel the “life lesson” would’ve been ruined if he actually bought them new ice creams. However he sacrificed his to show them a new life lesson. Sharing, which they struggled with and was the cause of their melted ice creams. So bandit did a good job of explaining consequences and also learning to share and not be greedy.
Dance Mode!!!! That’s one of my favorite episodes!
Is nobody going to point out that they're DOGS eating CHOCOLATE ice cream?
I’m also on the fence about Bandit giving up his ice cream, but by doing so, Bandit gives his kids an example of kindness and grace - his looking into their bowl to make sure they have enough - and Bluey and Bingo immediately agree to take turns with the ice cream spoon.
Not only did they get a valuable life lesson, but they also internalized it.
Other episodes that have somewhat similar concepts of fairness are “Magic Claw” and “Pass the Parcel” which I think are worth checking out
I would love to see the purple underpants episode, S1E32. My child is chronically ill and it broke me the first time I watched it.
I think Bandit makes the right call and it is consistent with his parenting style. He focuses on positive response.
The kids will learn the lesson better that dad shared his ice cream after they messed up, rather than possibly resenting that they tried to make things fair, and tried to share.
They could easily mistakenly take the lesson of "Don't try to share" rather than "Don't be obsessed with fairness"
I haven't checked yet to see all of the episodes you've covered ... this is the 3rd one I've watched. If you haven't done Hammerbarn yet that's a good one about being happy with what you've got rather than comparing what you have to what others have.
I didn't know bandit sharing his ice cream, and teaching them to share was controversial. Like you said, he was being a role model.
If it was me, I would've shared some of mine but not given it all. But I also would've intervened during the melting phase earlier to warn them about the potential issue. And I probably would've offered them my spoon to use to try each others' flavors to begin with.
I have made my husband shirts that say “big daddy man” and “I don’t want a valuable lime lesson, I just want ice cream” with related pics on them and he loves them so much 😂
I think it depends heavily on the age of the child(ren) in question, and who they are as people. Some kids, like Bluey and Bingo, are pretty sensitive and thoughtful, so the situation hits them harder/differently. You can hear Bluey, especially, is near tears, but also trying to accept the situation. She feels truly hurt that her own actions, however unforseen, have led to such deep disappointment, but she also knows that Bandit isn't going to change his mind, so she's trying to navigate living in her deep sadness.
I know other kids, especially once they get older, who will get angry about being told no instead of disappointed that they were their own downfall, and they see the parent as the problem, not their own behavior.
In Bluey's case, she already got consequences to her actions - the deep sadness of loss and recognizing that she made her own problem and is now stuck in the consequences. Bandit let's her be in that sadness for a minute and understand why she's in that situation, and then he helps her out of it, affirming himself to his kids as someone who will help them with their problems.
If Bluey instead had started blaming Bandit (or even Bingo) for her loss and demanding that her ice cream be replaced, I'd say it would be more appropriate to hold firm on the no ice cream. Because at that point she's not recognizing that her actions were the catalyst to her problem.
Some young children won't be able to understand that concept, while most older children can, which is why age as well as general self awareness/sensitivity are important to consider, especially if the child is known for taking perceived failures hard (ie if Bluey was going to turn the loss into an internal monolog of "I'm the worst, I'm a screw up, I'm so irresponsible"), or if the child has a trauma history that might by triggered by the denial of replacement (for example, children who have a history of food deprivation as punishment). Lots of factors to consider.
I think what bandit did was the right call, because it didn’t mean that they were able to pick their ice cream favors. They still got consequences because now they got a flavor that they didn’t want. But it’s also minimized for them, so that the ice cream doesn’t ruin their entire trip. i’m not a parent though, and I do think both has merit as he said.
Can you please react to "the sign" it's a longer episode at the end of season three and I think it could be fun to talk about making big life choices in relationships
It depends on the situation if giving the ice cream (or other desired thing) is the right decision. In this case, yes, because Bandit was fairly certain that Bingo and Bluey would learn from their valuable life lesson, even if they did just want an ice cream.
But if this had been Muffin and Stripe, sticking to no more ice cream for you would have been right because Muffin would have just taken the sweets and been on with her day
I love that you're making more Bluey videos!! I'd like to see what you think of the 2 episodes called Space and The Sign
When I was a kid my mom had to learn to stop using the word “promise” because I have a wicked memory and if she promised to buy me an ice cream “next time” I would remember, even if next time was months later. She had to switch to “maybe next time.” And if I asked if she promised she would say no, she isn’t promising but if I’m good she’ll try. Because it’s important to keep your promises. I’ve carried that through to my life too I will not promise to do something unless I 100% know I can follow through. I was a little like eeeeerrrrr when Bingo said “it’s actually your job to give us your ice cream.” I felt that was dipping into entitled language and Bandit should have probably told her “it’s my job to ensure you learn how to share your ice cream.” Buuuut the episodes are only 7 minutes after all.
"No it wasn't, it was like this! Bleh!"
~ Bluey
I think it depends on the kid. But on the real, life will always be teaching you lessons about compromise, self regulation, accountability, etc. Do ‘em a sweetness and maybe, when those lessons come down hard on them one day, they’ll remember it won’t always be too bad. Sometimes you still get an ice cream at the end.
This also feels like a lesson for Bandit! “not everything has to be a lesson” lesson 🎉
I do think what was done here is the right choice considering what the girls went through and it shows what they learned. It would be interesting to compare this episode with somehting like The Claw, which also makes mention of things being unfair.
If you'd like to see another episode on fairness I recommend Hammer Barn
The episode Takeaway made me start crying as my nephew watched, it hit me good. I think that's another one with a good lesson for the adults.
I think the kids learned the ice cream lesson of dither too long and it’ll melt and you get nothing is a good ice cream based lesson, then to see them share with each other without squabbling is a reward beyond chocolate ice cream
Our main house motto is *Life's Not Fair*. Maybe I will work in that fair is inherently subjective peice.
“Circus” is an amazing episode about how to be a good leader.
I agree with you Johnathan, and that what's tricky as there's multiple teachings to learn from. Personally i would of warned them that the ice creams are melting and to share or not share. If they chose not to eat & lose them, then I would probably say, I'm sorry that you lost your ice creams and that's hard. I might chose to share none of mine, or give a little to each in their cones. Depending on the situation at the time.
Please do ragdoll, explorers, army, ghost basket, and the sign
bingo: bluey reached for my ice cream....she drew back a nub......
Turtleboy would be a great episode to look at
That “dig in” icecream joke was the worst joke of all time, WHY AM I SMILING? YOUR smile and laughter is infektions, i Think, even for bad jokes!
I also find muffin and stripe interesting in this episode, i think sometimes its easy to forget that how your parent your own kid can impact the other parents and kids around us, Stripe is very indulgent with Muffin which on one hand shes 3 so I do get it and I don't think shes a bad kid, but him caving to her so much was noticed by Bluey and Bingo and tbh they pushed their luck in this episode a lot more than I think they usually would because they saw how Stripe responded to her. Sometimes when out with multiple kids for an afternoon like that its smart to decide on a united front with the other parent and explain to your kid beforehand how the days going to go if it will be different from how you might be if it were just the two of you to avoid these kinds of situations
I’d say he made the good call for his specific kids, as he might’ve known they’d likely follow his example of sharing and take take in the lesson. Either way would’ve been good but also Bandit might’ve thought about his initial thought of skipping the ice cream anyway pushing an adult towards giving in lol
If this is a first time mistake, I think the chocolate ice cream is fine.
3:06 look at bingos eyes! Jonos screens blocking bingos pupils, leading to haunting bingo!
I think it is situational. I think he gave them the ice cream for multiple reasons. They were trying to share, and he really didn't want it to begin with... but gave in to a craving. The girls are young, and they have plenty of time for natural consequence lessons ... and mostly, he just wanted to enjoy the time with his girls. It is shown that Bandit goes on work trips... sometimes long ones. So, giving in to their wants and just sitting in the park to have quality time is just going to give his girls the special dad time memories that get them through the times when he's away.... and Chili so much needed time alone.
Some episode suggestions would be Pass the Parcel, Dance Mode, Dirt, and Stickbird
We’re all loving Bluey ❤ Thanks for this video
Just like you, I think there's room for both, and you have to pick what moment you want to employ each strategy. Though I will always be in favor of instilling mercy, compassion and sharing in other people over letting them suffer. Just in general.
I love Bandit and Chilly’s parenting. I think I would have done the same though. Although I only have one kid, so I’m not privy to the back and forth chaos.
I think bandit also did the right thing becuase he really is trying to stay in shape 😂
My 4 year old is deep in the "it's not fair" phase. But it's usually about totally normal things. Like gravity. It's sometimes funny, but largely exhausting. 🙃
If the kids had expected Dad to share his ice cream, then sharing it would have been the wrong call. But since they weren't insisting on it, I think sharing was fine.
I think in a way, dad did both options. He said no first, let them feel the weight and reality of that consequence, and them realizing they could have done it differently, and wishing they had. Then get option two, and see the benefits there too and then emulate generosity with each other! As a nanny of 2 boys, this scene has played out many times for me! How i play it also largely depends on their attitudes at the time!
I would split the difference and share my ice cream with the kids.
I would love if you got the chance to react to "The Sign" episode. It was so controversial on whether or not Bandit didn't allow his kids to learn the way life operates, or that moving is necessary for financial reasons sometimes, whenever he backed out of selling their home for the happiness of his family. I totally get that take, but i also think sometimes that take has caused parents to fall victim to always considering financial discomfort (obviously they lived comfortably, but most people in the world would oot for living lavishly- if given the chance) as seniority over emotional and other discomforts for their kids and spouse.
I am so Bandit.
2:18 4:54 5:05 thoroughly enjoying these Bluey episodes because Jono is #relate chuckling. He's so charmed by these fictional characters and it just comes to show how much he loves children and is great with them!
How about Camping? It's wildly cited as one of the best episodes.
I explained to my kids who were asking that “fair” means different things to different people, so it’s a non-starter for our family 😂
This episode of bluey could be called “fair” With how manny times the Word is used in it!
I probably would have shared my ice cream... not given it to them fully. Because then I could still be using it as a lesson in sharing and they also see that, even as a parent, I'm a human too who also deserves ice cream. That's the one thing I think that it feels like the episode of Bluey left out. It's great for parents to sacrifice but children also need to learn that a parent is still a human too and deserves treats and respect as well.
Pass the Parcel please
I'd ask the children *what* the valuable life lesson they learned from the experience and depending on the answers they give I share my ice cream instead of just giving it up to them. It's an extra large there's enough for all three, but that would only be a one time thing and I'd be sure to tell them so.
Something controversial as well, Bandit is eating CHOCOLATE. CHOCOLATE is lethal to DOGS. XP
I think the consequences depends on the ages, personalities, and specific situation on the day of
Some days we are giving some days we go without
Something interesting goes on in both Copycat and Space; I think you should check those episodes out.
I've done both. I've given up my icecream/thing but I've also immediately after seeing theirs was gone and they start to turn to look at me I shove mine all the way in my mouth as fast as I can, like.... mmphphhhfff?? Oh no, sorry, I ate mine. Yours is gone, too bad, eh? You gotta be more careful, you dropped it, now it's gone.
I wouldn't give them my ice cream
I live for how feral Muffin is.