this. i have such good childhood memories w my dad but as soon as i hit like 9 he was terrible. i was in therapy for a lil for it until i decided it wasn’t helping after 6m and then everything crumbling from there on
Being in your late teens is the worst, you’re not old enough to understand adult problems and you’re still in Highschool but you’re still ostracized from child spaces and called “old”
"it's just a girl harmonising with a fan" no, it's the feeling of laying on the bedroom floor, taking deep breaths trying to hold back the tears and thoughts while your arm bleeds.
“It’s just a girl harmonizing with her fan” No. It’s the sound of finally coming to terms with your emptiness and sadness. The grief of a life you could’ve had. It’s the sound of being so tired you can’t even feel anything as silent tears sting your eyes but never got to fall. It’s the sound of mourning what could’ve been your life.
"its just a girl harmonizing with a fan" no, it's actually the sound of realizing you didn't mean nearly as much to your best friend as they meant to you, and watching all the fun memories suddenly mean nothing and having to mourn as if you lost them even though you technically never had them to begin with.
"Its just a girl harmonizing with a fan." No. Its understanding that everything comes to an end. Everything will one day die. That life is inevitably going through entropy. The feeling that life is meaningless without us giving it meaning.
But having no meaning means you’re free to make your own. It means that, as long as you’re not hurting people, there’s no wrong way to live. Having no meaning means you can’t fail, you have no standard to meet - which gives you plenty of time to just live.
"it's just a girl harmonizing with her fan?" no it's not, it's the feeling of being completely numb and wanting to cry so you lay in your bed for hours on end, staring into the ceiling, just *waiting* to feel some sort of tear drop down my face *for once.*
Im a music major and harmonizing WITH the harmonization is a new level of ascending. It sounds like the ghost of what you’re grieving watching you unseen as u mourn, and singing with you as a reminder that it’s still there even if you cant feel it
As a often overwhelmed and sad autistic person, this is one of the few things i can stand when my mind doesn't want to exist anymore, but can't stand the silence.
this sounds like when your 'friends' in primary school needed to have a convo without you and you picked the grass on the ground and made daisy chains while they talked
To me this is grief. The fan is like the noise of the world, words you can't even hear because in your head, you are still in the headspace of the person being alive, present. They are dead but not quite a memory just yet. It's a slow realization. A slow coming to terms.
this is a beautiful way of putting it. it implies that they added so much color and liveliness in the midst of our boring monotonous world - like bright fireworks exploding against the black night sky
"this is just a girl harmonizing with her fan." no. it's not. this is emotion. this is waking up in the middle of the night, scared that you've been left alone when you only kicked off your blanket. this is walking up to your parents bedroom after a bad dream because you were scared. this is missing out on something with your friends because you were sick. this is staring at your mess of a room, not able to clean it because you're stressed out but the reason you're stressed out is the mess. this is missing someone you've never met. this is the feeling after finally being able to cry. this is not feeling that pain anymore after healing. this is life. this is being a human with emotions.
"it's just a girl harmonizing with her fan" No it's not, This audio can't even be put into words, It's different for everyone, It's nostalgic, what grief feels like, It's heartbreaking and comforting. To me, It sounds like the moment you realize you are no longer a child, when you stopped needing a nightlight to sleep because you aren't afraid of the dark anymore, When you didn't need your mom to sing you a lullaby to sleep anymore because her voice lost it's beauty for all the smoke, You didn't need to check for monsters under the bed or in the closet because we knew the true monsters were in out head, We don't need someone to hold our hands while we cried because we learned to hold our own hands. It's the grief of the past we wish we could return to where everything was better, or go back and change things so they weren't so bad now, this is the sound of regret, dread, and comfort.
Yeah this audio has a different effect on everyone; some find peace, some find joy, some fine relief, and some find sorrow. We all fee something however, and that’s what makes this audio so special
“It’s just a girl harmonizing with her fan!!” No. It sounds like when you love someone you can’t have, so you sit in silence. Thinking what you could do to make yourself more likable.
I know the trend is supposed to be sad but this reminds me of when I used to wake up before the sun rose on a school day. When my mom finally trusted me enough to get ready by myself. It's screams of solitude and integrity. Finding joy in things you've done forever, but suddenly have a renewed energy about them
This is what being alone feels like, this is what people watching when your sad feels like, this is what realization feels like, this is what reflecting on your life feels like
this is what grief feels like to me. remembering the past in a bittersweet tone, knowing that a precious life has left the world but remembering how much happiness they brought you and the memories that will never fade.
“It’s just a girl harmonizing with her fan” no it’s not, it’s how it feels when you actually experience what it was like to be a kid again one last time just before you die, AND when you get to heaven and hear the words “someone’s been waiting for you”
"Its just a lullaby" No it feel like your mother is humming you to sleep while your dad is making your milk so that you can drink before going to bed. It feel like youre sleeping with your parents. Your dad is sleeping while facing you and your mom is humming you to sleep after a bad dream. It feel like your mom is humming to calm you down after you fell from your bike and hurt your knee.
"its just a girl harmonizing with her fan" no, its the feeling right after a funeral of someone you loved so much, watching the casket close knowing that that was the last time you will ever see them again.
“it’s just a girl harmonising with a fan” no. it feels like when i have to pick the pieces of what was left of me after i cried while i laid in my bed in a new city, away from my family while i grieved the loss of my childhood and its sense of wonder after i lost the most precious family member in my life who raised me nearly 3 years ago
It's just a girl harmonizing with her fan" no, it is the sound of crying on your bedroom floor and wishing you could go "home" It is mourning a past that didn't exist. It is sitting on a tree stump in your backyard a little bit past sunset. It is falling asleep mid day while it rains and a good video essay is playing.
What this song feels like to me: - The snow - Long car rides in the pitch black night - The feeling of pure, black hopelessness when you realise you can't fix what is happening - Love for those who hurt you - When the only reasons you're staying alive are the name on your gravestone and the need to protect others - Sitting in the garden at night, listening to music and staring up at the sky - Waiting, waiting, waiting for something, anything, to change - Those few truly happy moments in between the grief and pain - Realising she's just like you used to be - Yearning to escape - Realising how young she was - Realising how young you were - The stories you never wrote - The future, or at least the one you hope for - A long winter's night in a country far away from everyone you know, as you breathe in the bitter air that stings your face and realise you're ready to start your own life - Being torn between leaving and staying - The numbness after the trauma - Trying desperately to cry, only to realise that the things that used to make you tear up, don't anymore. - Knowing the world is terrible, and you can't save it - Realising what really happened - Not knowing if there's light at the end of the tunnel, or if it's just another mirage - Night - Dreaming of a future that will never come - A lucid dream that seemed to last days, until you finally gather the courage to ask for the one thing you want more than anything in the world, but will never get in real life. Once you ask for it, you get it, and now, finally, you feel at peace. Everything you want has been granted to you. Which only leaves the option to leave the dream for good and never come back. (This one is based on personal experience of a dream I had.)
“It’s just a girl harmonizing with her fan” so close!! it's actually the sound of finally being loved by someone whos goal is not to break you, but to heal you. to heal with you. to love with you. to take care of you, with you. to take you into their arms, when your arms cant hold yourself anymore. to love every little 'mistake' that you see in yourself, and love it as if it was the most beutiful thing they have ever seen. to let your inner-child finally rest and heal, heal from the battles and wounds you went through, just trying to find peace and acceptance. its the sound of finally being able to rest and heal.
@@Eren_yeager0727 One day, you can allow yourself to heal. You will get to enjoy to freedom of looking at yourself with pride, knowing you got over the obstacles in your life. I believe in you Stranger. Always remember that there are people who do so. I am one of them. Take care of yourself.
"Its just a girl harmonising with a fan" no, it's the sound of me mourning my innocence and wishing I had a more fulfilling childhood instead of blurred images of things I don’t want to remember anymore.
"its just a girl harmonizing with her fan" no. its realizing that you really are your mothers son. exactly like her, despite doing everything to make sure you dont become that way
this feels like bittersweet grief but even in grieving, theres still hope. hope for the day you arent consumed by the overwhelming blanket of grief youve nestled yourself in. hope that one day, itll be okay again
“It’s just a girl harmonizing with her fan” No, it’s actually the feeling of crying on your floor, hugging a plush to your chest, imagining it’s your younger self. Kissing their head and rubbing their back, telling them that one day things will change, and you’ll always be there for them no matter what. Because they don’t know what will happen to them in the future. Hugging that plush tight and imaging that in some other universe, somewhere out there in a different timeline, they’re still happy to be alive and they still love their parents because they don’t understand and they won’t until it gets to the breaking point.
“it’s just a girl harmonizing with her fan” so close!!! it's the feeling of knowing i'll always be stuck being attached to the past and i'll never be in the futures of the people i love in the present
This is what feeling alone sounds like. Watching your life and your memories, and you just feel nostalgic. All that pain, all that sadness is just gone, your life is moving forward, and you are alone. It's bittersweet. You are leaving part of yourself behind, so you're mourning too.
"Its just a girl harmonizing with her fan" So close, its actually the sound that echoes in my head as I mourn the loss of my older sister and best friend, sobbing in my room at late hours in the night telling my mom that I'm actually laughing so I don't have to talk about it again or else I will be in physical pain.
Sound exactly how my realization set in. That feeling when you realize they were right and you trusted the wrong person. Hate, grief, and sadness mixing into one.
"It's just a girl harmonizing with her fan." No, it's the feeling you get after the realisation that the relationship you once had with your father will never be able to come back. All the memories, all the laughter, everything in the past for good, because you both slowly grew apart from eachother.
“it’s just a girl harmonising with a fan” no. it sounds like all those times you wondered to yourself if you really were so unworthy that your own father didn’t love you it sounds like all those times you wanted your mother to hold you when you cried, but she was the one always crying in yours it sounds like doing everything in your power to not end up like your parents, but always carrying your father’s rage and your mother’s pain it sounds like realising that even though you’re an adult now, you still feel like a child. you had to raise yourself then, and you have to raise yourself now. it sounds like the empty feeling of knowing that there will always be something wrong with you. no matter where you go or how much you try to escape, you can never run from yourself
"it's just a girl harmonising with her fan" no, it's the sound of your mother crying beside your hospital bed as you make your last pinky promise with her
Listen i know im just a random stranger on the internet, but im here for you if you need someone to listen to you. I dont usually make these type of comments, but i hope i be of help to you. Just know that youre not alone
@@9ofswords.267 im so glad to hear that!!! keep going it will only get better from here on out but if you do ever feel like you have noone im here for you.
this sounds like when my mom used to take me to daycare early in the morning before the sun came up and she went to work. I was barely awake, but i remember the sky was starting to lighten and the stars were fading from the sky. the street lanterns lit the condensation drops on the windows. I remember my mom signing me in as i leaned against her leg. she kissed my forehead, told me she loved me and would be back after work before leaving. I remember the nice ladies taking me to the big open playroom where the other kids were sleeping in their cots covered with multicolored blankets.
"It's just a girl harmonizing with her fan." No, it's the tune that was playing in my head the last time I left my childhood home, not knowing it would be the last time it felt like home to me.
It feels like leaving you're friends funeral, walking out knowing that was the last time you got to see them not knowing the time you huged each other after the sleepover was the last. 💔
“Its just a girl harmonizing with her fan” no it’s not, it’s how it feels when you finally feel safe around the people you really trust and you get the chance to heal your inner child who was always picked on, left out, given gross looks, lost his/her confidence
"It's just a girl harmonizing with her fan" So close, it's the sound of my soul shattering after you told me that you couldn't care less if I was in your life anymore, after calling me the one, promising to marry me, planning out the names for our kids, promising to be better parents than ours were to us.
"its just a girl harmonizing with a fan.." No its the feeling of finally realizing that im not the problem and not having to cry every night while my self hatred gets worse.
Everyone here is sharing rough times, and dont get me wrong, it makes me feel sad too. But under it all i just feel some sort of hope from this audio. The fan is droning and boring and meaningless, dull and irritating. But theres always hope. Always a good side. Always a harmony. If not right now, then later. Sometimes i feel like the fan. Bringing people down, barely even making a difference. Just an annoying note held on too long. All my friends are trying to bring me up, comfort me, make me better, but ill always just be that one note. Sometimes i feel like the girl. Its my job to help people, make them happy, make them better. Its not easy to harmonize, and its even harder when youre always harmonizing. When it works, it sounds beautiful, but if it fails, its horrible and dissonant. But this harmony works. It sounds sad, but calm. I could cry myself to sleep with this playing, or it could be background noise while im writing. It sounds like all the sad things that people have listed combined. But it also sounds like late nights, looking out your window, and just looking at the stars. Feeling the wind of cars going by while youre walking down the sidewalk. Laying on the soft grass and closing your eyes. It sounds like good times, the times that you store in your memory and look back on in your dark days to remind yourself that life gets better. It always will. In a sense, i see myself in this audio. Walking down that snowy street. Knowing that its not hopeless. Listening to a song, and being happy for the first time in a while. Reading the comments, i feel like im right next to everyone. Everyone sharing their stories, laying in the grass and looking at the night sky. At peace with each other and ourselves.
“just a girl harmonizing with her kitchen fan” no it’s not. it’s the nostalgia of laying in bed for hours on end wanting and needing to cry but not being able to.its rereading the old texts, wishing you could go back in time and cherish what you had, before you lost it.
This gives me such a strong feeling that I don't know how to express into words. I feel as if I am mourning something but yet at the same time I am yearning for something. I cannot figure out which one it is and what the end goal is, but it is beautiful. It is comforting yet makes my heart ache. I love it lol.
This sounds like scrolling through the old conversations I had with my best friend before he passed away, bitterly smiling at the old inside jokes I will never get to make anymore because no one else understands them
"it's just a girl harmonising with a fan" It feels more like remembering someone that's no longer there, but the memory feels warm, safe and comforting.
For me this is the sound of coming to terms with something, have it be grief or something drastic happens and you are finally accepting this really is happening/happened. Not wanting to, yet having no choice. So you stare for seemingly hours at nothing just thinking and processing. For me this is the sound of moving on, something happened and now you are trying to cope, get past it, and live. Letting go of the pain and learning to survive. In the end this audio can mean so many things, it makes me feel like I'm dying, healing, living, surviving, struggling, and so on. For me, this is the sound of not being able to express my pain, so instead I sit and dissociate. I sit and I cry alone, wiping my own tears and holding myself because I can't speak. So I'll hum to myself alone in my room at night while holding myself and wiping my own tears, because it's all I know to do. I'll sit here and hum as I come to terms with my pain and that this is my life, and I'll sit here and hum as I move on and heal. So, what do you hear?
"It's just a girl harmonizing with a fan" wrong. It's the sound of laying in your hospital bed with a broken arm, silently crying because the IV has run out and you're too loopy to simply get up and ask for help. A nurse (or is it your mother?) comes to you and ask why you're crying.
"it's just a girl harmonizing with a fan" No, it's a single mom lying in bed humming to her sleeping child, while she quietly weeps as she feels the weight of her responsibilities and the loss of a romantic love she may never again experience crushing on top of her, and knowing there is nothing she can do but keep going.
“it’s just a girl harmonizing with her fan” so close, it’s actually the sound of discovering that the girl you’ve known for ten years has been struggling with her mental health and you feeling extreme guilt about it for not noticing!
"it's just a girl harmonising with her fan" it's the sound of police coming into your house, muffled and separated from you as you lie in the bathtub with the phone in your hands and red sticking to your body
“It’s just a girl harmonising with a fan” no, it’s the sound of finally accepting your fate, knowing how desperate you are to change and yet you know you will never be able to rewrite your past knowing you could’ve done so many things differently. A somber “this is who I am, and who I will always be”. It is painful acceptance. It is glorifying sadness and grief over the death of a future you could’ve had. The kid you were never allowed to be. It is the agony of trying to hold on to that will to live.
This feels like how I feel when I’m laying in an ER bed after a self harm crisis. I’m relieved of what was built up, but also worries about the ambulance, and ER, and possible admission costs. I like this feeling, however it’s bittersweet
"it's just a girl harmonising with her fan" so incredibly close! but it's actually the sound of watching your best friend's little sibling braid their hair as they lie on life support with their neck covered by a blanket
Im so, so sorry. I hope that one day you'll heal and live happily knowing your friend is in a better place. I wish the best for you and your friend. Love ❤❤❤
"It's just a girl harmonizing with her fan!" No. No, it's not. It's the sound you hear when you think of how different your life would've been if you were born in a different universe, timeline, generation, or simply had a different father.
“It’s just a girl harmonising with a fan” actually it’s the silence in the house after your body was picked up by the funeral home and the machine that had been keeping you breathing was no longer running for the first time in three years since you got sick.
Thanks, I have been listening to this on repeat for hours now and I still can’t stop crying. I can’t help it reminds me of my childhood and my mom way too much,it kinda feels like sleeping in my bed for the last time not knowing what is about to happen, it feels like my childhood, like spending summer with my friends in the village, this is what my life used to sound like. I wish I could go back, fix everything or maybe even restart, I didn’t value things before I lost them. I want to go home but I can’t -this is kinda the closest thing that I have to home now. Thanks… ( eng is not my fist language, I’m just ranting here because I’m feeling really sad rn, I’m Ukrainian btw)
i have never shared this, and i just feel like where else? strangers see it and who cares ya know? my senior years my best friend took his life. the morning a few hours before i got called up to the office i found out, i had a feeling something horrible happened. his gf told me they had a huge fight and she hasn't heard from him or his family. when i got into the office before they told me i knew. i was in silence. i left school early i sat in my living room alone. just staring. this is that feeling... this is the feeling of knowing you will never speak to your best friend ever again. you learn to harmonize with the pain that never leaves.
“It’s just a girl harmonizing with her fan” no it's finally starting to get better bc of your friends that gave you hope for something you thought was long gone
"its just a girl harmonizing with her fan" no its looking at my 2 year old brother not wanting him to go through the pain life has to offer its wanting him to stay in this ignorant bliss forever
“it’s just a girl harmonizing with a fan”
no it feels like when it doesn’t sting to take a shower anymore
hi stranger, im really proud of you. Also, stranger, I love you. Keep going, you are worth everything.
@@me_isverykewl3850thank you so much that’s means a lot 😭😭❤️ exact same goes for u!!
@@me_isverykewl3850i love u sm bro ❤️❤️😭
Ah that made me cry 😭
I’m really proud of you dude.. 🫂 keep going. I’ll be rooting for you, random stranger. Really, I promise.
“It’s just a girl harmonizing with her fan” no, it’s the feeling when you wish to mourn something that never existed.
this one bruh...
'its just a girl harmonising with a fan" so close, its actually the sound of my dad when he used to play with us
That's beautiful
This one hurt my heart (i miss my dad)
this. i have such good childhood memories w my dad but as soon as i hit like 9 he was terrible. i was in therapy for a lil for it until i decided it wasn’t helping after 6m and then everything crumbling from there on
THIS.
It feels like mourning your childhood... 💝
Being in your late teens is the worst, you’re not old enough to understand adult problems and you’re still in Highschool but you’re still ostracized from child spaces and called “old”
i turned 18 today, it feels exactly like this.
the childhood you never got to experience. :)
as a 13 year old i do this 😔
it does.
"it's just a girl harmonising with a fan" no, it's the feeling of laying on the bedroom floor, taking deep breaths trying to hold back the tears and thoughts while your arm bleeds.
Damn. You ok? :/
🫂❤
We’ll patch each other up and keep going until we stop bleeding together, no matter how long it takes
I stand with you. Our hearts beat together. Even if my arm has never bled, I know others whose arm has. We can heal together
I'm sorry you went through that... we hope you're okay...
“It’s just a girl harmonizing with her fan” No. It’s the sound of finally coming to terms with your emptiness and sadness. The grief of a life you could’ve had. It’s the sound of being so tired you can’t even feel anything as silent tears sting your eyes but never got to fall. It’s the sound of mourning what could’ve been your life.
or its a girl harmonizing with a fan.
@@mokivalera3563😭😭
But you still yet live, my friend. Which means you can start building a better life right now. I believe in you, never give up.
You say with a picrew pfp
@@yippee376 wow such a burn😐😐😐
“its just the sound of a girl harmonizing with her fan” No, its the sound of walking into your grandmas empty bedroom.
AND TEARS EVERYWHERE, CLEANUP ISLE MY FACE
"its just a girl harmonizing with a fan"
no, it's actually the sound of realizing you didn't mean nearly as much to your best friend as they meant to you, and watching all the fun memories suddenly mean nothing and having to mourn as if you lost them even though you technically never had them to begin with.
I understand this so deeply
The truth of that hurts
this one…. fuck…
"Its just a girl harmonizing with a fan."
No. Its understanding that everything comes to an end. Everything will one day die. That life is inevitably going through entropy. The feeling that life is meaningless without us giving it meaning.
I agree!
no im pretty sure its just a chick humming lil bro
anicca
But having no meaning means you’re free to make your own. It means that, as long as you’re not hurting people, there’s no wrong way to live. Having no meaning means you can’t fail, you have no standard to meet - which gives you plenty of time to just live.
@@harmonlanager2670 dude…poetry 😭
"it's just a girl harmonizing with her fan?" no it's not, it's the feeling of being completely numb and wanting to cry so you lay in your bed for hours on end, staring into the ceiling, just *waiting* to feel some sort of tear drop down my face *for once.*
This is so real. I’m sorry you have to go through this
This.
That's me rn.
Im a music major and harmonizing WITH the harmonization is a new level of ascending. It sounds like the ghost of what you’re grieving watching you unseen as u mourn, and singing with you as a reminder that it’s still there even if you cant feel it
I've been trying different ranges along with the video, doing a lower tone sounds almost heavenly-
Its the feeling of going to a place with little kids and imagining "poor babies, dont know what awaits for them"
For the love of God, why did you have to put it into words 💔
You'd love the two headed calf by Laura gilpin
As a often overwhelmed and sad autistic person, this is one of the few things i can stand when my mind doesn't want to exist anymore, but can't stand the silence.
Same!
This and tiktok neurodivergent record player. But that doesn't make me cry.
This.🙏
this sounds like when your 'friends' in primary school needed to have a convo without you and you picked the grass on the ground and made daisy chains while they talked
oh noooo not the "can you leave us alone for a while because we're having a private chat"
To me this is grief. The fan is like the noise of the world, words you can't even hear because in your head, you are still in the headspace of the person being alive, present. They are dead but not quite a memory just yet. It's a slow realization. A slow coming to terms.
it’s the feeling of my best friend leaving this world before i even got to say goodbye.
this is a beautiful way of putting it. it implies that they added so much color and liveliness in the midst of our boring monotonous world - like bright fireworks exploding against the black night sky
"this is just a girl harmonizing with her fan."
no. it's not. this is emotion.
this is waking up in the middle of the night, scared that you've been left alone when you only kicked off your blanket.
this is walking up to your parents bedroom after a bad dream because you were scared.
this is missing out on something with your friends because you were sick.
this is staring at your mess of a room, not able to clean it because you're stressed out but the reason you're stressed out is the mess.
this is missing someone you've never met.
this is the feeling after finally being able to cry.
this is not feeling that pain anymore after healing.
this is life. this is being a human with emotions.
"it's just a girl harmonizing with her fan"
No it's not, This audio can't even be put into words, It's different for everyone, It's nostalgic, what grief feels like, It's heartbreaking and comforting.
To me, It sounds like the moment you realize you are no longer a child, when you stopped needing a nightlight to sleep because you aren't afraid of the dark anymore, When you didn't need your mom to sing you a lullaby to sleep anymore because her voice lost it's beauty for all the smoke, You didn't need to check for monsters under the bed or in the closet because we knew the true monsters were in out head, We don't need someone to hold our hands while we cried because we learned to hold our own hands.
It's the grief of the past we wish we could return to where everything was better, or go back and change things so they weren't so bad now, this is the sound of regret, dread, and comfort.
Yeah this audio has a different effect on everyone; some find peace, some find joy, some fine relief, and some find sorrow. We all fee something however, and that’s what makes this audio so special
You worded this so perfectly and beautifully.
"its just a girl harmonizing with her fan." No it feels like realizing you need to stop running from it.
This
"it's just a girl harmonizing with her fan.." no, it's the sound my heart plays when I remember things I'll never get back.
“It’s just a girl harmonizing with her fan!!”
No. It sounds like when you love someone you can’t have, so you sit in silence. Thinking what you could do to make yourself more likable.
Ok, this
THIS ONE.
It sounds like the feeling of crying yourself to sleep
I know the trend is supposed to be sad but this reminds me of when I used to wake up before the sun rose on a school day. When my mom finally trusted me enough to get ready by myself. It's screams of solitude and integrity. Finding joy in things you've done forever, but suddenly have a renewed energy about them
“Its just a girl harmonizing with a fan” no, its the feeling of weeping in your room with the door locked because you have nobody left to talk to
This is what being alone feels like, this is what people watching when your sad feels like, this is what realization feels like, this is what reflecting on your life feels like
too true.
this is what grief feels like to me. remembering the past in a bittersweet tone, knowing that a precious life has left the world but remembering how much happiness they brought you and the memories that will never fade.
"It's just a girl harmonizing with a fan!!"
No, it isn't. It's when you realize you're no longer a kid and became the person you never wanted to be.
you couldnt have explained it better.
"it's just a girl harmonising with a fan"
No, it's realizing that one person you thought would last forever is long gone by now. And always will be.
“It’s just a girl harmonizing with her fan” no it’s not, it’s how it feels when you actually experience what it was like to be a kid again one last time just before you die, AND when you get to heaven and hear the words “someone’s been waiting for you”
"Its just a lullaby"
No it feel like your mother is humming you to sleep while your dad is making your milk so that you can drink before going to bed.
It feel like youre sleeping with your parents. Your dad is sleeping while facing you and your mom is humming you to sleep after a bad dream.
It feel like your mom is humming to calm you down after you fell from your bike and hurt your knee.
"its just a girl harmonizing with her fan"
no, its the feeling right after a funeral of someone you loved so much, watching the casket close knowing that that was the last time you will ever see them again.
So tired as an adult, but remembering sleeping in your mamas arms with the sun on you as she rocked you
Inside Out 2 needs to hire this girl RIGHT NOW
It feels like facing the fact that you’re not good enough for anyone
“it’s just a girl harmonising with a fan”
no. it feels like when i have to pick the pieces of what was left of me after i cried while i laid in my bed in a new city, away from my family while i grieved the loss of my childhood and its sense of wonder after i lost the most precious family member in my life who raised me nearly 3 years ago
It's just a girl harmonizing with her fan" no, it is the sound of crying on your bedroom floor and wishing you could go "home" It is mourning a past that didn't exist. It is sitting on a tree stump in your backyard a little bit past sunset. It is falling asleep mid day while it rains and a good video essay is playing.
What this song feels like to me:
- The snow
- Long car rides in the pitch black night
- The feeling of pure, black hopelessness when you realise you can't fix what is happening
- Love for those who hurt you
- When the only reasons you're staying alive are the name on your gravestone and the need to protect others
- Sitting in the garden at night, listening to music and staring up at the sky
- Waiting, waiting, waiting for something, anything, to change
- Those few truly happy moments in between the grief and pain
- Realising she's just like you used to be
- Yearning to escape
- Realising how young she was
- Realising how young you were
- The stories you never wrote
- The future, or at least the one you hope for
- A long winter's night in a country far away from everyone you know, as you breathe in the bitter air that stings your face and realise you're ready to start your own life
- Being torn between leaving and staying
- The numbness after the trauma
- Trying desperately to cry, only to realise that the things that used to make you tear up, don't anymore.
- Knowing the world is terrible, and you can't save it
- Realising what really happened
- Not knowing if there's light at the end of the tunnel, or if it's just another mirage
- Night
- Dreaming of a future that will never come
- A lucid dream that seemed to last days, until you finally gather the courage to ask for the one thing you want more than anything in the world, but will never get in real life. Once you ask for it, you get it, and now, finally, you feel at peace. Everything you want has been granted to you. Which only leaves the option to leave the dream for good and never come back. (This one is based on personal experience of a dream I had.)
Í agree with these
why has god forsaken me with this comment T_T
What was the thing you wanted but couldn't get? If you don't mind me asking
“It’s just a girl harmonizing with her fan” so close!! it's actually the sound of finally being loved by someone whos goal is not to break you, but to heal you. to heal with you. to love with you. to take care of you, with you. to take you into their arms, when your arms cant hold yourself anymore. to love every little 'mistake' that you see in yourself, and love it as if it was the most beutiful thing they have ever seen. to let your inner-child finally rest and heal, heal from the battles and wounds you went through, just trying to find peace and acceptance. its the sound of finally being able to rest and heal.
I wish i could experience this 🤞
@@Eren_yeager0727 One day, you can allow yourself to heal. You will get to enjoy to freedom of looking at yourself with pride, knowing you got over the obstacles in your life.
I believe in you Stranger. Always remember that there are people who do so. I am one of them.
Take care of yourself.
@Kraeuterbutterbaguette thank you so much, this means a lot to me. I wish the best to you too. ❤️
"Its just a girl harmonising with a fan" no, it's the sound of me mourning my innocence and wishing I had a more fulfilling childhood instead of blurred images of things I don’t want to remember anymore.
That too
this couldn’t be more relatable.
"its just a girl harmonizing with her fan" no. its realizing that you really are your mothers son. exactly like her, despite doing everything to make sure you dont become that way
this feels like bittersweet grief but even in grieving, theres still hope. hope for the day you arent consumed by the overwhelming blanket of grief youve nestled yourself in. hope that one day, itll be okay again
“It’s just a girl harmonizing with her fan”
No, it’s actually the feeling of crying on your floor, hugging a plush to your chest, imagining it’s your younger self. Kissing their head and rubbing their back, telling them that one day things will change, and you’ll always be there for them no matter what. Because they don’t know what will happen to them in the future. Hugging that plush tight and imaging that in some other universe, somewhere out there in a different timeline, they’re still happy to be alive and they still love their parents because they don’t understand and they won’t until it gets to the breaking point.
“it’s just a girl harmonizing with her fan”
so close!!! it's the feeling of knowing i'll always be stuck being attached to the past and i'll never be in the futures of the people i love in the present
This is what feeling alone sounds like. Watching your life and your memories, and you just feel nostalgic. All that pain, all that sadness is just gone, your life is moving forward, and you are alone. It's bittersweet. You are leaving part of yourself behind, so you're mourning too.
"it's just a girl harmonising with her fan" it's the feeling of telling the kid's help line worker about what that man did to you
it's being told it wasn't your fault.
Hey, I see you have multiple comments here. Do you wanna talk?
@@Eren_yeager0727 thank you :) i was in a bit of a bad place when i wrote these but i'm alright for now. we can still talk tho if you'd like :))
"Its just a girl harmonizing with her fan" So close, its actually the sound that echoes in my head as I mourn the loss of my older sister and best friend, sobbing in my room at late hours in the night telling my mom that I'm actually laughing so I don't have to talk about it again or else I will be in physical pain.
Sound exactly how my realization set in. That feeling when you realize they were right and you trusted the wrong person. Hate, grief, and sadness mixing into one.
"It's just a girl harmonizing with her fan." No, it's the feeling you get after the realisation that the relationship you once had with your father will never be able to come back. All the memories, all the laughter, everything in the past for good, because you both slowly grew apart from eachother.
“it’s just a girl harmonising with a fan”
no. it sounds like all those times you wondered to yourself if you really were so unworthy that your own father didn’t love you
it sounds like all those times you wanted your mother to hold you when you cried, but she was the one always crying in yours
it sounds like doing everything in your power to not end up like your parents, but always carrying your father’s rage and your mother’s pain
it sounds like realising that even though you’re an adult now, you still feel like a child. you had to raise yourself then, and you have to raise yourself now.
it sounds like the empty feeling of knowing that there will always be something wrong with you. no matter where you go or how much you try to escape, you can never run from yourself
are u me 😭
@@rirism. i wish you the best in life stranger :(
@@desihalwai3897 u too honestly, i bet ur super kind. thank u 😭
@@rirism. :’)
"it's just a girl harmonising with her fan" no, it's the sound of your mother crying beside your hospital bed as you make your last pinky promise with her
Listen i know im just a random stranger on the internet, but im here for you if you need someone to listen to you. I dont usually make these type of comments, but i hope i be of help to you. Just know that youre not alone
@@Kaz80085 thank you :)) I'm alright though, the pinky promise to my mum was that I'd try my best to recover, and so far I've kept it quite well
@@9ofswords.267 im so glad to hear that!!! keep going it will only get better from here on out but if you do ever feel like you have noone im here for you.
this sounds like when my mom used to take me to daycare early in the morning before the sun came up and she went to work. I was barely awake, but i remember the sky was starting to lighten and the stars were fading from the sky. the street lanterns lit the condensation drops on the windows. I remember my mom signing me in as i leaned against her leg. she kissed my forehead, told me she loved me and would be back after work before leaving. I remember the nice ladies taking me to the big open playroom where the other kids were sleeping in their cots covered with multicolored blankets.
"It's just a girl harmonizing with her fan." No, it's the tune that was playing in my head the last time I left my childhood home, not knowing it would be the last time it felt like home to me.
"its just a fan, why are you crying?"
It feels like that moment when you were 10 years old giving your mom the longest hug of your life
It feels like leaving you're friends funeral, walking out knowing that was the last time you got to see them not knowing the time you huged each other after the sleepover was the last. 💔
im going to start sobbing
“Its just a girl harmonizing with her fan” no it’s not, it’s how it feels when you finally feel safe around the people you really trust and you get the chance to heal your inner child who was always picked on, left out, given gross looks, lost his/her confidence
It’s the calm feeling of holding your newborn baby to your chest.
this sound makes me feel like I'm not alone, even when everything else is telling me I am
you are not alone, im here ml
"It's just a girl harmonizing with her fan"
So close, it's the sound of my soul shattering after you told me that you couldn't care less if I was in your life anymore, after calling me the one, promising to marry me, planning out the names for our kids, promising to be better parents than ours were to us.
"its just a girl harmonizing with a fan.."
No its the feeling of finally realizing that im not the problem and not having to cry every night while my self hatred gets worse.
Everyone here is sharing rough times, and dont get me wrong, it makes me feel sad too. But under it all i just feel some sort of hope from this audio. The fan is droning and boring and meaningless, dull and irritating. But theres always hope. Always a good side. Always a harmony. If not right now, then later.
Sometimes i feel like the fan. Bringing people down, barely even making a difference. Just an annoying note held on too long. All my friends are trying to bring me up, comfort me, make me better, but ill always just be that one note.
Sometimes i feel like the girl. Its my job to help people, make them happy, make them better. Its not easy to harmonize, and its even harder when youre always harmonizing. When it works, it sounds beautiful, but if it fails, its horrible and dissonant.
But this harmony works. It sounds sad, but calm. I could cry myself to sleep with this playing, or it could be background noise while im writing. It sounds like all the sad things that people have listed combined. But it also sounds like late nights, looking out your window, and just looking at the stars. Feeling the wind of cars going by while youre walking down the sidewalk. Laying on the soft grass and closing your eyes.
It sounds like good times, the times that you store in your memory and look back on in your dark days to remind yourself that life gets better. It always will. In a sense, i see myself in this audio. Walking down that snowy street. Knowing that its not hopeless. Listening to a song, and being happy for the first time in a while. Reading the comments, i feel like im right next to everyone. Everyone sharing their stories, laying in the grass and looking at the night sky. At peace with each other and ourselves.
“just a girl harmonizing with her kitchen fan”
no it’s not. it’s the nostalgia of laying in bed for hours on end wanting and needing to cry but not being able to.its rereading the old texts, wishing you could go back in time and cherish what you had, before you lost it.
This is the same feeling I felt when I was finally free from him. I was safe. I didn’t have to be afraid anymore.
I hope ur doing better luv x
This comment section made me realize I’m not the only one. That’s the worst feeling… feeling like nobody understands so u suffer in silence
This gives me such a strong feeling that I don't know how to express into words. I feel as if I am mourning something but yet at the same time I am yearning for something. I cannot figure out which one it is and what the end goal is, but it is beautiful. It is comforting yet makes my heart ache. I love it lol.
"its just a girl harmonizing with her fan" no its when the feeling of never getting to be a kid again sinks in
This feels like the past relationship with your siblings and how you are all growing up and apart while you realise it will never be the same
This sounds like scrolling through the old conversations I had with my best friend before he passed away, bitterly smiling at the old inside jokes I will never get to make anymore because no one else understands them
"it's just a girl harmonizing with a fan"
no, it's the feeling of finally feeling comfort in a hug.
It’s not just a girl harmonising with her fan. It’s when you can’t bring yourself to cry so you hum along to the beat in your mind instead.
"it's just a girl harmonising with a fan"
It feels more like remembering someone that's no longer there, but the memory feels warm, safe and comforting.
For me this is the sound of coming to terms with something, have it be grief or something drastic happens and you are finally accepting this really is happening/happened. Not wanting to, yet having no choice. So you stare for seemingly hours at nothing just thinking and processing. For me this is the sound of moving on, something happened and now you are trying to cope, get past it, and live. Letting go of the pain and learning to survive. In the end this audio can mean so many things, it makes me feel like I'm dying, healing, living, surviving, struggling, and so on. For me, this is the sound of not being able to express my pain, so instead I sit and dissociate. I sit and I cry alone, wiping my own tears and holding myself because I can't speak. So I'll hum to myself alone in my room at night while holding myself and wiping my own tears, because it's all I know to do. I'll sit here and hum as I come to terms with my pain and that this is my life, and I'll sit here and hum as I move on and heal. So, what do you hear?
"It's just a girl harmonizing with a fan" wrong. It's the sound of laying in your hospital bed with a broken arm, silently crying because the IV has run out and you're too loopy to simply get up and ask for help. A nurse (or is it your mother?) comes to you and ask why you're crying.
"it's just a girl harmonizing with a fan"
No, it's a single mom lying in bed humming to her sleeping child, while she quietly weeps as she feels the weight of her responsibilities and the loss of a romantic love she may never again experience crushing on top of her, and knowing there is nothing she can do but keep going.
"its just a girl harmonizing with a fan"
no, its that feeling when u realise your teacher is always gonna notice u missing.
(my experience rn)
guys i might be depressed
We’re here if you want to talk or just listen to this sound together
@@inairswapna thanks ❤️
"it's just a girl harmonizing with her fan" so close babes, but actually this is the sound of what ive been longing for in a mother! thanks!!
“it’s just a girl harmonizing with her fan” so close, it’s actually the sound of discovering that the girl you’ve known for ten years has been struggling with her mental health and you feeling extreme guilt about it for not noticing!
“It’s just a girl harmonizing to her fan” no, this is the sound that played in my head when my grandmother told me her cancer was spreading today…
“it’s just a girl harmonizing with a fan” no, its that feeling of missing that time where my mom wasnt single and it was easy to live happy
"it's just a girl harmonising with her fan" it's the sound of police coming into your house, muffled and separated from you as you lie in the bathtub with the phone in your hands and red sticking to your body
“It’s just a girl harmonising with a fan” no, it’s the sound of finally accepting your fate, knowing how desperate you are to change and yet you know you will never be able to rewrite your past knowing you could’ve done so many things differently. A somber “this is who I am, and who I will always be”. It is painful acceptance. It is glorifying sadness and grief over the death of a future you could’ve had. The kid you were never allowed to be. It is the agony of trying to hold on to that will to live.
This feels like how I feel when I’m laying in an ER bed after a self harm crisis. I’m relieved of what was built up, but also worries about the ambulance, and ER, and possible admission costs. I like this feeling, however it’s bittersweet
It feels like loosing your entire family and being the only one to walk the world
"it's just a girl harmonising with her fan" so incredibly close! but it's actually the sound of watching your best friend's little sibling braid their hair as they lie on life support with their neck covered by a blanket
Im so, so sorry. I hope that one day you'll heal and live happily knowing your friend is in a better place. I wish the best for you and your friend. Love ❤❤❤
"It's just a girl harmonizing with her fan!"
No. No, it's not.
It's the sound you hear when you think of how different your life would've been if you were born in a different universe, timeline, generation, or simply had a different father.
“It’s just a Girl harmonizing with her fan”
No it’s not it brings back the wonderful memories we had and the ending of them.
“It’s just a girl harmonising with a fan” actually it’s the silence in the house after your body was picked up by the funeral home and the machine that had been keeping you breathing was no longer running for the first time in three years since you got sick.
Thanks, I have been listening to this on repeat for hours now and I still can’t stop crying. I can’t help it reminds me of my childhood and my mom way too much,it kinda feels like sleeping in my bed for the last time not knowing what is about to happen, it feels like my childhood, like spending summer with my friends in the village, this is what my life used to sound like. I wish I could go back, fix everything or maybe even restart, I didn’t value things before I lost them. I want to go home but I can’t -this is kinda the closest thing that I have to home now. Thanks…
( eng is not my fist language, I’m just ranting here because I’m feeling really sad rn, I’m Ukrainian btw)
"It's just a girl harmonizing with her fan?" No, it's the feeling when you lose that very important someone in your life that saved you.
i have never shared this, and i just feel like where else? strangers see it and who cares ya know? my senior years my best friend took his life. the morning a few hours before i got called up to the office i found out, i had a feeling something horrible happened. his gf told me they had a huge fight and she hasn't heard from him or his family. when i got into the office before they told me i knew. i was in silence. i left school early i sat in my living room alone. just staring. this is that feeling... this is the feeling of knowing you will never speak to your best friend ever again. you learn to harmonize with the pain that never leaves.
It's the feeling of knowing someday there will truly be nothing, but cherishing each fleeting moment before it too vanishes into the vast nothing.
This is what melancholy feels like. Not mad, not sad, just feeling good cleaning or crafting or swinging on a porch swing 😊
“It’s just a girl harmonizing with her fan” no it's finally starting to get better bc of your friends that gave you hope for something you thought was long gone
"it's just a girl harmonizing with her fan" no, it's when you know you're a bad person and you don't do anything about it and choke on your own anger
"it's just a girl harmonizing with a fan" no it's the feeling of wanting another life but not wanting it at the same time.
it feels like losing everything
"It's just a girl harmonizing with her fan" So close...but no, it's when my mom used to sing me to sleep before she got sick.
"its just a girl harmonizing with her fan" no its looking at my 2 year old brother not wanting him to go through the pain life has to offer its wanting him to stay in this ignorant bliss forever
“it’s just a girl harmonizing with a fan”
its me enjoying seeing my mom.
'its just a girl harmonizing with her fan' no, its realising you didnt deserve the abuse