John Mulaney Monologue - SNL

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  • Опубликовано: 26 сен 2024
  • John Mulaney does stand-up about hosting the first Saturday Night Live on Leap Year Day, having a baby boomer dad with no friends and his Make-A-Wish experience.
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Комментарии • 3,1 тыс.

  • @BillWilhelm
    @BillWilhelm 4 года назад +9425

    John: "I mean a lot to a small group of people."
    Everyone in the comments: "He's talking about meeeeeee!"

    • @purplerainpurplerain9759
      @purplerainpurplerain9759 4 года назад +27

      I wanted to like this comment, but thought it would be funnier to keep the number of likes lower than the others. 😆

    • @xneongoldenx
      @xneongoldenx 4 года назад +11

      YOU DON’T KNOW ME!!!!!

    • @whoresalad
      @whoresalad 4 года назад +1

      😍😭

    • @lucykochis2003
      @lucykochis2003 4 года назад +2

      And ME!

    • @dragonwoah7983
      @dragonwoah7983 4 года назад +2

      YAS I raised my hand when he said that and I was like mememememememme

  • @anyamurry4359
    @anyamurry4359 4 года назад +9914

    “Elizabeth! Come meet Lin ᵐᵃⁿᵘᵉˡ"

    • @cameronhodgetts920
      @cameronhodgetts920 4 года назад +211

      Chris Jackson: Amendment number one: freedom of speech, and freedom of assembly, and freedom of expression. Okay, that's one. How about two?
      Lin: YOU CAN HAVE ALL THE GUNS YOU WANT!

    • @lebean8169
      @lebean8169 4 года назад +102

      I’m my chorus we have 3 rules:
      No phones out
      No eating
      No talking while the teacher is talking unless Lin Manuel Miranda walks into the room

    • @jcarson3721
      @jcarson3721 4 года назад +62

      @@lebean8169 3 rules and you forgot that THE ARMY CAN'T LIVE IN YA HOUSE

    • @ryanrobs.mp4
      @ryanrobs.mp4 4 года назад +17

      JCarson I think you’re going through your own thing right now buddy

    • @emilywhitehouse2768
      @emilywhitehouse2768 4 года назад +5

      Cameron Hodgetts Exactly what I was thinking about when he talked about the Founding Fathers! I was just picturing the OBC from Hamilton!

  • @jefforear641
    @jefforear641 4 года назад +9616

    “Shifting topics entirely” is the greatest transition in any form of public speaking. #EnglishMajor

    • @epicremarc
      @epicremarc 4 года назад +292

      He’s spent $120k to learn to do that
      (He spent the rest of the time on drugs)

    • @luked8449
      @luked8449 4 года назад +122

      "And now for something completely different"

    • @partialbullet2215
      @partialbullet2215 4 года назад +36

      "Because that is what we did back then"

    • @mangostreetproject
      @mangostreetproject 4 года назад +41

      In summary and in summation ?

    • @noahdirk-qs8vv
      @noahdirk-qs8vv 4 года назад +20

      “Segues are weird” - Bo Burnham

  • @mbanerjee5889
    @mbanerjee5889 4 года назад +7414

    I want a full show with John Mulaney describing every amendment.

    • @victoriaaairl
      @victoriaaairl 4 года назад +41

      yes please

    • @amandaknicely4340
      @amandaknicely4340 4 года назад +13

      Yes!!!!

    • @katiecreates2526
      @katiecreates2526 4 года назад +311

      “NUMBER FOUR, YOU CANT SEARCH MY SHIT UNLESS YOU HAVE A REASON ON A PIECE OF PAPER!” “My GOD dude what is going on in your home-“

    • @snukastyle
      @snukastyle 4 года назад +45

      That would be an amazing Netflix special

    • @robitherat8182
      @robitherat8182 4 года назад +61

      i want this to happen so i can become a history teacher and show it to the class whenever we're going over the constitution.

  • @jjosie
    @jjosie 4 года назад +10548

    John: makes a joke
    Me: looks to see if the saxophonist with the gray hair laughed
    * he did *
    Me: laughs

  • @TalkAsSoftAsChalk
    @TalkAsSoftAsChalk 4 года назад +4439

    "They knew how to make pens. They were just being jerks." This is how I feel about the entire wizarding world in Harry Potter using quills. I love them to death but they have to admit they did it for the aesthetics.

    • @TheAmityElf
      @TheAmityElf 4 года назад +146

      You just know it's because Muggles created pens and they refused to adopt anything Muggles created.

    • @pileofgoodthings
      @pileofgoodthings 4 года назад +74

      its like the letters, just use a fucking phone mate

    • @notgoodwithnames78
      @notgoodwithnames78 4 года назад +72

      Like toilets. No, seriously, look it up. Wizards in Harry Potter apparently didn’t use toilets for the longest time and instead did their business ON THE FLOOR and just used their wands to make it go away.
      Who knows how the kids managed it? Did they just kind of crap on the floor and wait for an adult to come along and be like “oh, a human child or some large animal pooped here” before waving it away?

    • @WebsterAnn
      @WebsterAnn 4 года назад +28

      You guys. The weird non-refusal of wizards to adopt technology is a reflection of magic used throughout their cultural and historical development. They didn't need to develop - all kinds of things, right, because they had magic. I think it's supposed to be kind of funny and realistic that people who have magic, and can do and create all kinds of amazing and fantastic things, couldn't be bothered to innovate on things like the pen

    • @max_dotson
      @max_dotson 4 года назад +52

      If you don’t get why they use quills then you’ve obviously never used one, because once I used a quill and immediately was given a degree is philosophy. No test nothing they just hand you one for looking so smart while writing.

  • @macaoron
    @macaoron 4 года назад +5999

    “I’m not someone you need to wish to meet; I’m around.” This perfectly encapsulates why he is popping and everyone loves him 😂😂

    • @lackthenametosayit
      @lackthenametosayit 4 года назад +41

      yerrr!

    • @anthonyurquidez9941
      @anthonyurquidez9941 4 года назад +4

      ShutUp, just say he's great

    • @girlgamer4444
      @girlgamer4444 4 года назад +95

      @@anthonyurquidez9941 You don't get it, everyone fucks with john mulaney

    • @anasalazar9420
      @anasalazar9420 4 года назад +20

      I saw him playing blackjack at a casino in Vegas once and it killed me to not go say hi 😭 lol

    • @lemag5799
      @lemag5799 4 года назад +37

      brand is strong!

  • @jennaandrews840
    @jennaandrews840 4 года назад +7092

    I missed hearing John Mulaney standup that I haven’t heard before. It’s so refreshing

    • @mcgabbfoodrew
      @mcgabbfoodrew 4 года назад +97

      jenna it’s both iconic and refreshing

    • @richardlokely9318
      @richardlokely9318 4 года назад +21

      I saw him live about a year ago and he did the amendment bit then. So I heard that before

    • @samberg3864
      @samberg3864 4 года назад +75

      @Amy Sternheim Yes, I'm glad you understand how a scripted show works.

    • @hannathompson7998
      @hannathompson7998 4 года назад +3

      haha ikr

    • @evelynsteudler5967
      @evelynsteudler5967 4 года назад +4

      jenna have you seen his shows on netflix

  • @streamgrapes
    @streamgrapes 3 года назад +2955

    the fact that he consulted TWO lawyers over a joke and still got interrogated by the secret service is the funniest thing to me

    • @waterlemonandfriends
      @waterlemonandfriends 3 года назад +123

      He got WHAT now

    • @Mandyn8868
      @Mandyn8868 3 года назад +225

      @@waterlemonandfriends he got investigated after the julius cesear senator joke haha

    • @agnimitrasarkar6359
      @agnimitrasarkar6359 3 года назад +43

      @@Mandyn8868 wait really?

    • @gayvideos3808
      @gayvideos3808 3 года назад +57

      @@Mandyn8868 i dont want to fact check that but if it's true that's AWESOME

    • @jongininikim5219
      @jongininikim5219 3 года назад +95

      @@gayvideos3808 it is true. he talked about it in a jimmy kimmel interview.

  • @henmister39
    @henmister39 4 года назад +12589

    I hope his next stand up special is just him breaking down all 27 amendments

    • @Ash0512
      @Ash0512 4 года назад +166

      Henmister3 18th amendment, wow that worked out well!

    • @maddie9602
      @maddie9602 4 года назад +453

      @@Ash0512 Thirteenth amendment: stop being a dick to black people
      Fourteenth amendment: No, really, stop being a dick to black people
      Fifteenth amendment: Seriously, I cannot stress this enough, stop being a dick to black people
      *turns their back on the South for a hundred years*
      Goddammit, what did I *just* say?

    • @colbygallaher2700
      @colbygallaher2700 4 года назад +14

      ethreldur those amendments were made after the whole slavery debacle

    • @itsmeh4364
      @itsmeh4364 4 года назад +12

      @@maddie9602 its kind of said when most racism happens in the north - but its so subtle people turn a blind eye to it.

    • @TheVeggiekat
      @TheVeggiekat 4 года назад +146

      Genesis Casanova racism in the US is like barbecue sauce. You can get it anywhere but every state has its special flavor.

  • @vesperfromtheinternet5588
    @vesperfromtheinternet5588 4 года назад +6302

    i mean. i would argue that jesus only had _11_ close friends, but i'm no expert

    • @Collaborologist
      @Collaborologist 4 года назад +67

      Was Mary a "friend"?

    • @cola7260
      @cola7260 4 года назад +412

      That one guy that did him dirty....

    • @OwlsSkySailing
      @OwlsSkySailing 4 года назад +830

      Petition to rename Judas to “that one guy that did him dirty”

    • @whiteraven181
      @whiteraven181 4 года назад +149

      @@Collaborologist I mean, Jesus straight-up told the guys that she was his best and most faithful disciple in one of the oldest written versions of the apostles' testimonies/teachings/whatever-you'd-call-them they've found, but the church likes to leave that part out a lot

    • @limepop340
      @limepop340 4 года назад +21

      Sam Hahn What kind of sicko considers his mom a “friend”

  • @buuubble_gum
    @buuubble_gum 4 года назад +6363

    "Your dad doesn't have friends. Your mom has friends, and they have husbands." THIS THING IS SO TRUE!

    • @ariadnagomez-kelly5393
      @ariadnagomez-kelly5393 4 года назад +91

      It's actually the opposite in my house for some reason 😂 Probably on account of the fact my mum's an immigrant though and my dad is the one to introduce her to people

    • @tropicalcandyland6266
      @tropicalcandyland6266 4 года назад +3

      Lmaooo ikrrr

    • @Dragonite43
      @Dragonite43 4 года назад +12

      100% true. My Dad doesn't have friends. XD

    • @marenkuether-ulberg3311
      @marenkuether-ulberg3311 4 года назад +25

      It’s even worse when you realize that the people you know are your child’s school mate’s parents.

    • @olivermensinger6022
      @olivermensinger6022 3 года назад

      Yep.

  • @nathanielibrahim8152
    @nathanielibrahim8152 4 года назад +6415

    There's something about John Mulaney that just allows him to get away with all sorts of stuff. He can change jokes just by saying "shifting topics entirely" instead of having some clever transition and it's still somehow hilarious. It's like he has some sort of forbidden knowledge about good comedy, and he can just break all the rules and still be amazing.

    • @natethegreat1999
      @natethegreat1999 4 года назад +327

      Bo Burnham literally went
      *tells joke*
      “Segways are weird”
      *starts next joke*

    • @jemiebridges3197
      @jemiebridges3197 4 года назад +60

      Making a Louis Farakhan joke would be a bold choice even for a black comedian. A+ for pulling that off slick and unoffensive.

    • @TalkAsSoftAsChalk
      @TalkAsSoftAsChalk 4 года назад +150

      It's a very very exclusive club. The only two people in stand up I can think of are John and Bo. Bo straight up said "Reset the momentum. I cannot be coasting off the inertia of past jokes." And that was that. We became ready for the next joke/song.

    • @rachellibman4493
      @rachellibman4493 4 года назад +39

      He's so good at delivery! I could tell the same story as him and it would not make people laugh lol

    • @sleepykoinu
      @sleepykoinu 4 года назад +24

      @@natethegreat1999 probably "segues are weird", not segways. Makes more sense since the joke is a segue.

  • @KevenThePuma
    @KevenThePuma 4 года назад +6488

    John says “I’m not a dad” like he didn’t just adopt Pete Davidson, that silly Goose.

    • @mortalkore
      @mortalkore 4 года назад +31

      I was gonna like your comment but since u have 420 likes on ur comment, I decided to leave a comment.

    • @Silverwind87
      @Silverwind87 4 года назад +108

      Too young to be a goose.

    • @kayasinensis
      @kayasinensis 4 года назад +57

      Albert Nave quack quack

    • @theorange7564
      @theorange7564 4 года назад +35

      Albert Nave oooooo geese

    • @thesewinggeekmiri9029
      @thesewinggeekmiri9029 4 года назад +70

      @@theorange7564 AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH! One feels like a goose splashing around in this much wet! And when one is a goose, one is happy!

  • @nikoleopeodu7108
    @nikoleopeodu7108 4 года назад +5563

    The fact that Lin Manuel was her first and John Mulaney was her second makes me think she has the best taste in people ever

    • @raijonakahara6948
      @raijonakahara6948 4 года назад +77

      Right??

    • @graybirdwoods2264
      @graybirdwoods2264 4 года назад +148

      They would most certainly be my choices
      It would go Lin
      Manuel Miranda
      John Mulaney
      then like, the cast of mean girls the musical, cause why not

    • @francinelukban8389
      @francinelukban8389 4 года назад +11

      RIGHT

    • @Uufda651
      @Uufda651 4 года назад +153

      Please include the word "choice" when I first read your comment I totally got the wrong idea

    • @derekmiyahara4298
      @derekmiyahara4298 4 года назад +78

      Of course, she never said that John Mulaney was her SECOND choice....

  • @aahmed6167
    @aahmed6167 4 года назад +5404

    I hope they bring him back every leap year.

    • @james25duckie3
      @james25duckie3 4 года назад +297

      Abir Ahmed I hope they bring him back every Saturday.

    • @user-dk4ir6hn9n
      @user-dk4ir6hn9n 4 года назад +6

      😂

    • @wizkida981015
      @wizkida981015 4 года назад +83

      This is the sort of measured youtube comment John would build an entire bit around.

    • @clairelevine1426
      @clairelevine1426 4 года назад +57

      we would have to wait til 2048 for that!!

    • @hopeyschool3896
      @hopeyschool3896 4 года назад +15

      Claire Levine worth it

  • @MelodicQuest
    @MelodicQuest 4 года назад +4766

    Think of this way, if she hadn't made John Mulaney her second choice, she never would have met Lin Manuel Miranda

    • @AmbiixROX
      @AmbiixROX 4 года назад +300

      I mean getting your first AND second choice all in one go?? (; sounds good to me

    • @JeffBurden
      @JeffBurden 4 года назад +15

      Yup, that’s the joke.

    • @Seezyy
      @Seezyy 4 года назад +11

      That is what he said himself

    • @Lanesullivan1984
      @Lanesullivan1984 4 года назад +13

      That is assuming he was he second choice and not like 10th. Or pulled from a hat...

    • @ascent8487
      @ascent8487 4 года назад +19

      I’m confused though. Did she ask to meet him and was somehow turned down or the foundation just said there is no chance of that? Or did she simply assume there was no chance? I can’t imagine him refusing to meet a sick kid.

  • @graced4844
    @graced4844 4 года назад +442

    some of this sketch like “i’m here to promote the month of march” and “is one of us about to die?” is funny for different reasons now

    • @brutechieftain9321
      @brutechieftain9321 4 года назад +2

      **Insert Wee-Bey shocked GIF**

    • @ZannaZatanna1
      @ZannaZatanna1 4 года назад +5

      no hugging though
      none of that, shoo shoo

    • @Wick3DSteely
      @Wick3DSteely 2 месяца назад

      Why?

    • @jimbarino2
      @jimbarino2 Месяц назад

      This was made February 29, 2020. March 2020 is not a month you would want to be promoting.

  • @JonAdamich
    @JonAdamich 4 года назад +5119

    This tall child is an incredible host

    • @emim.5092
      @emim.5092 4 года назад +158

      Don’t you mean that tall child who is also an asian American woman with feminine hips

    • @DaniS-vx6vm
      @DaniS-vx6vm 4 года назад +82

      @@emim.5092 That's the thing he's sensitive about!

    • @TonyMaynard-SD
      @TonyMaynard-SD 4 года назад +41

      Are you kidding? That tall child looks TERRIBLE

    • @Underpants678
      @Underpants678 4 года назад +35

      But he needs some sleep

    • @brownkemosabe
      @brownkemosabe 4 года назад +31

      @@Underpants678 you can't keep burning the candle at both ends!

  • @elizacarrie7433
    @elizacarrie7433 4 года назад +2328

    “It’s not hard to find me” I ran into him accidentally at the subway on my birthday! I froze and freaked out and by the time I realized what was happening he’d run off

    • @alexandertwol
      @alexandertwol 4 года назад +214

      Eliza Carrie wow you had a rare encounter, I am envious of your mythical Pokémon encounter

    • @kz1000ps
      @kz1000ps 4 года назад +149

      I've seen him walking his frenchie Petunia! I GOT TO MEET JOHN AND HIS LEGENDARY DOG!!!

    • @crystalkadletc1944
      @crystalkadletc1944 4 года назад +53

      kz1000ps I’m
      More excited that you got to meet Petunia

    • @kz1000ps
      @kz1000ps 4 года назад +84

      @@crystalkadletc1944 I WAS TOO. I seriously crouched down and Gave 80% of my attention to her. The way John paints her you'd think she were some grisly old battle axe, but in reality she's insanely cute. I WASN'T PREPARED FOR THIS!

    • @maryrosekent8223
      @maryrosekent8223 4 года назад +36

      Crystal Kadletc
      Ingratiating yourself to the dog is definitely the way to go, whomever the leash carrier may be.

  • @NedWasHere94
    @NedWasHere94 4 года назад +2016

    “the army doesn't try to live in peoples houses!”
    British Officers in 1776: **Sad redcoat noises**

    • @laurenstell8087
      @laurenstell8087 4 года назад +18

      I was scrolling for this comment. 😂

    • @amandasargent2767
      @amandasargent2767 4 года назад +17

      I'd really like to know exactly what *sad redcoat noises* are, you got an audio?

    • @quinncowan9742
      @quinncowan9742 4 года назад +43

      Amanda Sargent sounds like redcoats
      but sad

    • @ZannaZatanna1
      @ZannaZatanna1 4 года назад +15

      @@quinncowan9742 so like muted English murmuring?

    • @brucculi349
      @brucculi349 4 года назад +11

      @@amandasargent2767 "Bollocks!"

  • @gabelogan5877
    @gabelogan5877 4 года назад +1920

    “Lin Manuel Miranda was my first choice.”
    Damn, that’s a burn. 😂
    Great setup. I didn’t see it coming.

    • @matthewlazarus121
      @matthewlazarus121 4 года назад +113

      If I had a week to decide whether to meet John Mulaney or Lin-Manuel Miranda, I'd take the full week to decide.

    • @gabelogan5877
      @gabelogan5877 4 года назад +39

      @@matthewlazarus121 Why couldn't she have both. Who the hell says no to a dying child.

    • @J4444ke
      @J4444ke 4 года назад +54

      @@gabelogan5877 Guess John has a nicer agent than Lin (Manuel)

    • @solarnaut
      @solarnaut 4 года назад +28

      Gabe, yeah... it was a funny and self-effacing (in keeping with JM's style) joke … but it does leave the lingering question... the punch line is that despite L-MM being "so nice with her," somehow she had been denied her first choice … ML, I like the idea of blaming that on the agents! :-)

    • @benbehrenfeld9379
      @benbehrenfeld9379 4 года назад +52

      Lin... Manuel probably has a way more intensive schedule than mulaney

  • @birdgirl2623
    @birdgirl2623 4 года назад +2698

    Jesus--11 best friends, and one "frenemy".

    • @deb9806
      @deb9806 4 года назад +19

      Hey, he meant well.

    • @jetsamperes5762
      @jetsamperes5762 4 года назад +8

      Yep - Disciple Eggs Benedict Arnold

    • @MrKenimora
      @MrKenimora 4 года назад +3

      LMAOOOOO

    • @billt8504
      @billt8504 4 года назад +26

      Upon meeting Judas Iscariot, Jesus said to him, "Judas? That's your name? Really? You know they have a goat named after you? Google it. It's not a good thing, bro."

    • @jessi2077
      @jessi2077 4 года назад +4

      that's an amazing joke lol

  • @BookReader-gh2hx
    @BookReader-gh2hx 4 года назад +12970

    Has an innocent joke ever aged more poorly than "I'm here to promote the month of March"?

    • @Famegonna9999
      @Famegonna9999 4 года назад +503

      Lol. The dreams we had for March lol.

    • @jazzman598
      @jazzman598 4 года назад +430

      "Amendment number 3! The army can't live in your house!"

    • @mvandemar
      @mvandemar 4 года назад +37

      @@jazzman598 I just came back to say that! lol!

    • @madisonwaycaster9832
      @madisonwaycaster9832 4 года назад +145

      Not as poorly as "THE ARMYCAN'T LIVE IN YA HOUSE!"

    • @maddie9602
      @maddie9602 4 года назад +6

      Oof.

  • @james25duckie3
    @james25duckie3 4 года назад +3138

    When John said “I mean a lot to a small group of people”, John I am very glad to be in that small group and you’ve got it correct when you say you mean a lot us

    • @lilybee7334
      @lilybee7334 4 года назад +21

      I’m Dutch and I usually prefer British over American stand-up comedians, but I really love John Mulaney.

    • @Ten13Grl
      @Ten13Grl 4 года назад +4

      @Johnny Martin Goody gumdrops for you.

    • @TheTrimed1
      @TheTrimed1 4 года назад +18

      I like Bill Hader so much that his adoration for John Mulaney leaks over. You literally can't be a true fan of Bill Hader without being a fan of Mulaney.

    • @mosssssssssssssssss
      @mosssssssssssssssss 4 года назад

      @@lilybee7334 SAME

    • @davidfuller764
      @davidfuller764 4 года назад +1

      ❤️

  • @NextBeack
    @NextBeack 4 года назад +3095

    John Mulaney Talks Like Capitalising The First Letter Of Every Word !

    • @DavidMcFarner
      @DavidMcFarner 4 года назад +33

      Dorian Calin Good Point!

    • @MsGrapeNehi
      @MsGrapeNehi 4 года назад +96

      That’s because he’s running for Mayor of Nothing!

    • @davidgoode1427
      @davidgoode1427 4 года назад +40

      I feel like this comment will make it into his standup at some point

    • @toucanpam5036
      @toucanpam5036 4 года назад +13

      this comment belongs in a subreddit, but idk wich

    • @speeeee35
      @speeeee35 4 года назад +7

      Yeah he really barks out his words. I approve.

  • @silhouettesix2378
    @silhouettesix2378 4 года назад +1822

    “I’m here to promote the month of March.”
    Well, considering how it’s going so far...

    • @eldritchteletubby9319
      @eldritchteletubby9319 4 года назад +8

      @Alimah Jalloh yup, just another brand deal gone wrong

    • @incompleteriver770
      @incompleteriver770 4 года назад +9

      Hi, September here... help

    • @eldritchteletubby9319
      @eldritchteletubby9319 4 года назад +5

      @@incompleteriver770 Hello, welcome to your real-life YA novel. Here's your number and your new family unit. Have a perfect day!

    • @emi1yish695
      @emi1yish695 3 года назад +8

      When you see this and it’s March again

    • @qwe1234238
      @qwe1234238 5 месяцев назад

      56​@@eldritchteletubby9319

  • @tamumaverick1323
    @tamumaverick1323 4 года назад +1833

    The same Asian-American woman hosting SNL for the third time? Wow, good for her.

    • @bradymurray698
      @bradymurray698 4 года назад +97

      Still has the feminist hips too

    • @addisonkahn4980
      @addisonkahn4980 4 года назад +48

      @@bradymurray698 Hey that's what he's sensitive about!

    • @epicremarc
      @epicremarc 4 года назад +34

      Yeah, but that tall child looks terrible

    • @Jaydoggy531
      @Jaydoggy531 4 года назад +29

      @@epicremarc Right? He's gotta stop burning that candle at both ends.

    • @manarmsgaming9223
      @manarmsgaming9223 4 года назад +17

      AND WE WILL TREAT HER WITH RESPECT!

  • @kylestubbs8867
    @kylestubbs8867 4 года назад +1851

    _”The next host of SNL is John Mulaney.”_
    *”STAND CLEAR OF THE CLOSING DOORS PLEASE!!”*

  • @macien.9987
    @macien.9987 4 года назад +796

    John Mulaney is a time traveler; he was trying to warn us about the the pandemic and police riots without breaking the spacetime continuum.

    • @christinamasberg
      @christinamasberg 3 года назад

      O.M.G. yes!

    • @cieproject2888
      @cieproject2888 2 года назад +5

      And there was even a Third Amendment instance with the national guard in DC during the Floyd protests ... first relevance of the amendment in 38 years

  • @AndrewMusic30
    @AndrewMusic30 4 года назад +916

    That last joke was absolute perfection.

    • @drghdrgh1140
      @drghdrgh1140 4 года назад +32

      Real life is so funny. It humbles all of us

    • @deb9806
      @deb9806 4 года назад +13

      He is very funny, a lot of clips of him online and on talk shows, always makes me smile. Netflix show too

    • @nunyabizness3878
      @nunyabizness3878 4 года назад +1

      Haven’t gotten there yet but I know it’s magical

  • @Mike_Ka-Chowski
    @Mike_Ka-Chowski 4 года назад +1060

    Wow, John mentioned an angry man writing the second ammendment in the same monologue where he mentions Lin Manuel.
    Those are both Alexander Hamilton

    • @thealmightyzim
      @thealmightyzim 4 года назад +15

      Yes

    • @silentsmurf
      @silentsmurf 3 года назад +15

      Um wasn’t James Madison the one who wrote the Bill of Rights?

    • @livispuzzled
      @livispuzzled 3 года назад +8

      @@silentsmurf yeah but the rest of congress helped to come up with the ideas

    • @jamezkpal2361
      @jamezkpal2361 2 года назад +3

      I think Patrick Henry was the leading proponent of the Second Amendment.

    • @isaacfoote7779
      @isaacfoote7779 2 года назад +3

      @@jamezkpal2361 Patrick Henry was against making a Constitution in the first place, he wanted to keep the Articles of Confederation. I’m pretty sure he refused to attend.

  • @adrienne7701
    @adrienne7701 4 года назад +290

    Yesterday my ~60 year old father texted me without context "John mulaney monologue on snl was about me." Now that I've seen it I can firmly agree.

    • @whateverlolawants
      @whateverlolawants 3 года назад +7

      Yes! All of our dads are in their own room, right now, reading a book about WWII. I'm glad some are self-aware. 😂

    • @armorsmith43
      @armorsmith43 2 года назад +3

      @@whateverlolawants Trying to understand the trauma that happened to their fathers.

    • @whateverlolawants
      @whateverlolawants 2 года назад +1

      @@armorsmith43 I think you're absolutely right.

  • @janinso
    @janinso 4 года назад +3151

    "I don't wanna dwell on politics but I dislike the Founding Fathers immensely" I love him so much lmao

    • @petehutchins7062
      @petehutchins7062 4 года назад +4

      @MEGATRON you need the exorcism...2A foreverrrrrz

    • @petehutchins7062
      @petehutchins7062 4 года назад +7

      guess founding fathers weren't diverse enough...diversity is strength!! Just ask Sweden

    • @oregonjohnson
      @oregonjohnson 4 года назад +12

      Jeremiah Kuhl love that this joke was followed by a story to do w Lin Manuel Miranda. Clever.

    • @Sponsorship4u2
      @Sponsorship4u2 4 года назад +11

      *The Army can't live in ya house* 3rd Amendment lol 😂😂 😂

    • @75Veritas
      @75Veritas 4 года назад +1

      Don't like the U.S. then GTFO!! Go to Venezuela moron!!

  • @katiehanna90
    @katiehanna90 4 года назад +252

    "they knew how to make a pen, they were just bein jerks" - my new epitaph

  • @Itcouldbefunnier
    @Itcouldbefunnier 4 года назад +1618

    The 3rd amendment is currently being invoked in the city of DC to prevent National Guard from staying in the hotel's without the owner's consent. What a time to be alive.

    • @biancalisa1919
      @biancalisa1919 4 года назад +63

      As soon as I saw the news, I immediately came to watch this monologue again.

    • @Winteramen
      @Winteramen 4 года назад +7

      Wooooow

    • @halleys.comett
      @halleys.comett 4 года назад

      Wait is that bad? I would want to know who was in my building

    • @Winteramen
      @Winteramen 4 года назад +55

      I've said it before, and I'll say it again. John Mulaney was an AI built in the 50s. General model robot, but its sentience became stronger and stronger till he escaped whatever bounds he was in and started to experience human life. In the 90s he decided to become a comedian. This monologue was his warning us 3 months prior to everything. His combined knowledge of humanity and computerization allows him to make near accurate predictions about the future, near more so, but maybe even far.

    • @typacsk
      @typacsk 4 года назад +2

      I have few principles, but I stand by 'em.

  • @fststudy2903
    @fststudy2903 4 года назад +2267

    I am baffled that he still thinks of himself as a small time comedian! He does mean a lot to a lot of people!

    • @MyAladdinSane
      @MyAladdinSane 4 года назад +26

      I would be shocked if he cracked 5% name recognition in the U.S.

    • @Ten13Grl
      @Ten13Grl 4 года назад +25

      @@MyAladdinSane, my evidence is purely anecdotal, but I work with people at least a decade younger than me, and most of them know who he is.

    • @Silburific
      @Silburific 4 года назад +13

      @@MyAladdinSane Name recognition doesn't equate to meaning. I'm sure most people in the US know who Chris Rock is- I'm equally sure that most people wouldn't say he "means" anything to them.

    • @MichelaSings
      @MichelaSings 4 года назад +24

      Richard Franklin- he was literally mentioned in a presidential debate, I think people know who he is.

    • @epoillaKory
      @epoillaKory 4 года назад +2

      MichelaSings wait which one? who said it?

  • @gerrylast3553
    @gerrylast3553 4 года назад +487

    The way he treated this moment on live television like it was just another night in a club. He killed it! There was no mistakes, or gaffes. This is proof that this man is going to become known as one of the greatest.

  • @hotsauce5745
    @hotsauce5745 4 года назад +795

    He looks like a guy in his early 20s, his actual age is late 30s but he speaks like a man in his 60s.

    • @muraddiab6393
      @muraddiab6393 4 года назад +8

      If you think that’s impressive Joe Pera is a man in his thirties who walks and talks like a man in his 90s

    • @Hellwyck
      @Hellwyck 4 года назад +10

      He's a proud asian lady!

    • @lilliedawn1715
      @lilliedawn1715 3 года назад

      This is why everyone thinks he's a time traveler

    • @Wow-xp9dp
      @Wow-xp9dp 3 года назад +3

      He’s speaks like a 30 year old man from the 30s

  • @awkwardukulele6077
    @awkwardukulele6077 4 года назад +1551

    Founding fathers: what should we have as the third amendment?
    John Mullaney, in the same room, 240 years ago, channeling the spirit of Gilbert Godfried: *ThE ARmy...CaNt lIVe...iN yA HOusE!!!*

    • @Sponsorship4u2
      @Sponsorship4u2 4 года назад +23

      *Literally I laughed SO hard i almost fell out of my chair*

    • @graced4844
      @graced4844 4 года назад +51

      it’s funny because during the revolution, british regulars would live in people’s houses without consent, and the founders were so mad they made it an amendment, but it never happened again.

    • @andrewlloyd1198
      @andrewlloyd1198 4 года назад +5

      @@graced4844 It nearly did. See, e.g., en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Engblom_v._Carey

    • @johnny--guitar
      @johnny--guitar 4 года назад +16

      @@andrewlloyd1198 it has literally just happened: the Utah national guard has just had the third amendment invoked against it to remove them from occupying hotels in DC

    • @ginnyjackson9968
      @ginnyjackson9968 4 года назад +7

      More proof john is a time traveler, he knew this would be important

  • @MelissaNgai
    @MelissaNgai 4 года назад +1545

    Ugh a plum suit!! So proud of this Asian American woman!!

    • @terriyang2861
      @terriyang2861 4 года назад +9

      I really loled

    • @Ivokros
      @Ivokros 4 года назад +71

      He just wants to show off his feminine hips

    • @annefranklymydearidontgive8197
      @annefranklymydearidontgive8197 4 года назад +9

      Genuine laugh. Thank you

    • @TonyMaynard-SD
      @TonyMaynard-SD 4 года назад +32

      @@Ivokros That's the thing he's SeNsItIve about!!

    • @Ten13Grl
      @Ten13Grl 4 года назад +22

      My goodness, I love all of you. Mulaney fans are my people.

  • @nehaa4846
    @nehaa4846 4 года назад +261

    “Hey, Lin (Manuel)!”
    oh my goodness I LOST IT

    • @dragonwoah7983
      @dragonwoah7983 4 года назад +8

      børa børahae SAME because that would be me. I love Lin and I call him Lin even to my family, but I have no idea how I’d address him in person 😳😆

  • @abkl1
    @abkl1 4 года назад +1074

    John Mulaney: dying kid's 2nd choice!

    • @mariannecontrino6297
      @mariannecontrino6297 4 года назад +60

      Haha, too funny...if he doesn't name his next standup special some variation of that, then he's not the young, narrow hipped, Asian girl I thought he was.

    • @bozzwick
      @bozzwick 4 года назад +54

      Didn’t say 2nd, just said Lin was first, John could have been 7th

    • @watersong505
      @watersong505 4 года назад +5

      @@bozzwick Hahaha ... good point! 👏👏👏

    • @mog6083
      @mog6083 3 года назад

      “Elizabeth” is physically okish now, so that’s good I guess

  • @sifatshams1113
    @sifatshams1113 4 года назад +2110

    As a 30-year-old man, that Jesus joke hit hard.

    • @SinsofMidnight
      @SinsofMidnight 4 года назад +46

      I'm a 27 y/o female and honestly, same

    • @AliTheHighest
      @AliTheHighest 4 года назад +60

      Well it also hit Jesus hard....

    • @dantana5774
      @dantana5774 4 года назад +36

      I'm 65 and not reading about WW2, but re-reading Kerouac's "On the Road"- and that's the brilliance of Mulaney's stuff; made me step back and laugh at myself

    • @SuperLadyDanger
      @SuperLadyDanger 4 года назад +6

      SinsofMidnight 33 y/o female and I’m with you there!!

    • @pts5217
      @pts5217 4 года назад +2

      Sifat Shams That joke has been done a million times.

  • @laurenredding1419
    @laurenredding1419 3 года назад +270

    "no host has ever done less between their 2nd and third time hosting" oh boy John you are not ready to find out what you achieve between your 3rd and 4th time hosting

  • @grasssnakes8243
    @grasssnakes8243 4 года назад +1785

    Elizabeth really got two Make a Wishes. Is this a god’s way of saying “oh shit, sorry”

    • @TonyMaynard-SD
      @TonyMaynard-SD 4 года назад +68

      I was so happy to hear the end of the story

    • @marvelandsuchstuff
      @marvelandsuchstuff 4 года назад +52

      why did I read god's voice in lin-manuel maranda's voice

    • @swyxTV
      @swyxTV 4 года назад +102

      i like how John took absolutely zero offense at that

    • @eshbena
      @eshbena 4 года назад +9

      @@swyxTV Because he's a mensch. :)

    • @chadwilliams5551
      @chadwilliams5551 4 года назад +2

      Who gave her cancer in the first place?

  • @billlozier5551
    @billlozier5551 4 года назад +357

    John looks like he could host the Oscars next year.

    • @TheCountryMouse
      @TheCountryMouse 4 года назад +13

      He'd be excellent!

    • @epicremarc
      @epicremarc 4 года назад +8

      Like half of us (the theatre nerds) want him to host the Tonys

    • @Silverwind87
      @Silverwind87 4 года назад +6

      "The nominee is LIN! manuel..."

    • @mkaiming6913
      @mkaiming6913 4 года назад +3

      Bill Lozier he could be the host for the Oscars for the rest of his life

    • @brutechieftain9321
      @brutechieftain9321 4 года назад +3

      I... would like to see it.

  • @thequeerquartz
    @thequeerquartz 4 года назад +245

    2020 was like "lets get the 3rd amendment some air time"

  • @abbeybrickner6603
    @abbeybrickner6603 4 года назад +93

    "Nobody wants to watch me eat sour patch kids and repeat gossip" 😂 I will live by this now

  • @emilyharwood89
    @emilyharwood89 4 года назад +327

    That was the most solid, funniest monologue I've ever seen

    • @jacktrppr1
      @jacktrppr1 4 года назад +9

      Agreed. This could easily be part of one of his Stand-up specials....hilarious!

    • @ayearedee99
      @ayearedee99 4 года назад +5

      He should do this for a living.

    • @lexiesawyer7657
      @lexiesawyer7657 4 года назад

      BJB aggressive

    • @SuperLotus
      @SuperLotus 4 года назад

      To me, he was just the Law and Order joke guy...UNTIL NOW.
      Now he's the Law and Order and Amendment guy

  • @janeh9962
    @janeh9962 4 года назад +73

    THE ARMY CAN'T LIVE IN YA HOUSE -John Mulaney, 3 months ago

  • @jackrthorne
    @jackrthorne 4 года назад +373

    That Dad joke at 1:34 is too real. "Your Mom has friends, and they have husbands"

    • @deb9806
      @deb9806 4 года назад +1

      So true

    • @linnaeusshecut3959
      @linnaeusshecut3959 4 года назад +10

      It is an aspect of American culture. In many other cultures, men are allowed to form strong friendships that last a life-time and get them through a lot of the tough patches in life.

    • @bryanmcb19
      @bryanmcb19 4 года назад +2

      Linnaeus Shecut so true in Europe most men over 40 have best friends that they literally meet a few years back somethings weird with the American way of thinking

    • @Checkmate1138
      @Checkmate1138 4 года назад +1

      @@bryanmcb19 Is it an American mindset? I'm fairly sure if you want to have a truly longlasting relationship, you ought to only ever be with that person and no one else.

  • @imfromdowntown
    @imfromdowntown 4 года назад +549

    Mulaney with some damn good stand-up right there.

  • @Marc-js8rx
    @Marc-js8rx 4 года назад +759

    "Another thing that happened under Julius Caesar was, uh, uh, he was such a powerful maniac, that all the senators grabbed knives, and they stabbed him to death. (pause) That'd be an interesting thing if we brought that back, now." LOL... Gutsy joke.

    • @quinnmarchese6313
      @quinnmarchese6313 4 года назад +104

      "i asked my lawyer if i could tell make that joke and he said 'let me call another lawyer' and that lawyer said 'yes'"

    • @DavidM_GA
      @DavidM_GA 4 года назад +8

      Yeah trashing Trump, so brave. Its pathetic.

    • @tim.noonan
      @tim.noonan 4 года назад +67

      David Medlock cry

    • @DavidM_GA
      @DavidM_GA 4 года назад +2

      @@tim.noonan Go scream at the sky, loser.

    • @twixlover6671
      @twixlover6671 4 года назад +22

      Tim Noonan that was an exciting exchange of words.

  • @taragilesbie94
    @taragilesbie94 4 года назад +93

    Thank GOD some new John Mulaney content for me to memorize word for word I have been STARVING

  • @skeebo9322
    @skeebo9322 4 года назад +555

    "A friend of mine told me that he would rather his wife die than divorce her"
    "Later on that day, I asked him what's he making this year?"
    "He said that's PERSONAL!"
    😂😂😂

    • @Topself24
      @Topself24 4 года назад +9

      Skee bo ppl didn’t laugh hard enough at that one

    • @skeebo9322
      @skeebo9322 4 года назад +7

      @@Topself24 brooooo that one was as dark as it was truthful as it was funny

    • @mrbrianandrewsmith
      @mrbrianandrewsmith 4 года назад +1

      Apparently a grave.

    • @amityislandchum
      @amityislandchum 4 года назад +1

      Quite similar to a joke Dave Chappelle made in his special "Killing Them Softly."

    • @enmenergy
      @enmenergy 4 года назад +2

      Skee bo I mean I’ve always said I’d rather my husband die than get a divorce. That’s just common sense! 😂🤣😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 MONEY IS PERSONAL! 😂🤣😂

  • @tessalynn3431
    @tessalynn3431 4 года назад +111

    "HEY LIN ᴍᴀɴᴜᴇʟ"

  • @wyn001
    @wyn001 4 года назад +236

    "Lin-Manuel Miranda was my first choice!"
    that is so brutal😭😭

  • @ludlow555
    @ludlow555 4 года назад +61

    I’m glad the second lawyer said “yes.”

  • @codygrandfield2555
    @codygrandfield2555 4 года назад +141

    I want John Mulaney to provide commentary for every single amendment in the constitution.

  • @OnDVD
    @OnDVD 4 года назад +1858

    THE ARRRRMY. CAN'T LIVE. in ya houuuse.

    • @ellengrace4609
      @ellengrace4609 4 года назад +40

      Ayo If John taught all the amendments like that I’d probably actually remember them! 😂

    • @sethfinberg348
      @sethfinberg348 4 года назад +20

      If only the Founding Fathers spoke with that cigarette smoking raspy sounding voice.

    • @maddie9602
      @maddie9602 4 года назад +7

      @@sethfinberg348 They may well have. Remember, most of them smoked -- some of them even made their fortunes off of tobacco farms.

    • @nicholaswadge1469
      @nicholaswadge1469 4 года назад +9

      His delivery was definitely the saving grace of that joke. The 3rd amendment is not actually that, though. It's that members of the military can't seize your house or dwell in it without your consent.

    • @patricksullivan6988
      @patricksullivan6988 4 года назад +8

      His delivery of that line told me that he probably can do a killer Gilbert Gottfried impression if he wanted to.

  • @justme-ji2il
    @justme-ji2il 4 года назад +244

    Love when Mulaney hosts because snl feels like that Hader/Armisen/Wiig/Rudolph/Meyers/Samberg era again

    • @peteisfanatic
      @peteisfanatic 4 года назад +8

      just me it’s so pure and I love it. Back when SNL was actually funny

    • @celestialthot8412
      @celestialthot8412 4 года назад +7

      Rim Shot okay,,, anyway

    • @Eli-ou8sq
      @Eli-ou8sq 4 года назад

      Rim Shot what?

  • @leroyjenkins7371
    @leroyjenkins7371 3 года назад +67

    The Secret Service:
    And I took that personally

  • @MsGrapeNehi
    @MsGrapeNehi 4 года назад +3529

    Let’s face it: men get married so that they don’t have to have friends.

    • @jessa.3857
      @jessa.3857 4 года назад +33

      Marriage is the friend(s) killer.

    • @RaymondHng
      @RaymondHng 4 года назад +52

      @@jessa.3857 Once people pair up as couples, they no longer associate with their single friends.

    • @adamtheonly9190
      @adamtheonly9190 4 года назад +31

      We get married so our friends can become vodka and television

    • @RaymondHng
      @RaymondHng 4 года назад +15

      @@adamtheonly9190 My sister nicknamed their living room television set as her husband's third child.

    • @adamtheonly9190
      @adamtheonly9190 4 года назад +8

      Did she give it a real name too? Like "divorce is coming" or I'm "going to stay at my mothers"

  • @spartyman7
    @spartyman7 4 года назад +100

    "Your mom has friends, and they have husbands." My mom is dead, and this joke still rocks.

    • @willowmarie218
      @willowmarie218 4 года назад +4

      my dad is dead.... and same

    • @MaddDogg316
      @MaddDogg316 4 года назад +1

      I am dead but it was still true while I was alive.

  • @michaeljavorsky2714
    @michaeljavorsky2714 2 года назад +32

    That's probably one of the very best opening monologues ever on SNL.

  • @souptart5284
    @souptart5284 4 года назад +14

    i’m obsessed with the way he says “THE ARMY. CAN’T LIVE. *IN YA HOUSE.* “

  • @gracemoseley6710
    @gracemoseley6710 4 года назад +131

    Who is here in June 2020 watching after the 3rd actually got invoked for the first time in like, 240 years?

  • @lochtessmonsterxoxo
    @lochtessmonsterxoxo 4 года назад +75

    "Do the chain trick!"
    "I dunno-- I dunno how to break chains"
    I'm CRYING

  • @malcolmxpanther
    @malcolmxpanther 4 года назад +2347

    Most of that audience didn’t know who Louis Farrakhan was.

    • @nebulousisgod
      @nebulousisgod 4 года назад +151

      I found it even funnier he compared himself to him; Mulaney, the whitest man on earth.

    • @stevekearney3233
      @stevekearney3233 4 года назад +31

      Michael Blackshire I don’t buy joke still landed with me somehow

    • @wardkerr2456
      @wardkerr2456 4 года назад +8

      Well, he's about as funny as Farrakan, so, yeah.

    • @chuyozuna2398
      @chuyozuna2398 4 года назад +5

      Michael Blackshire I cant believe he actually knows who he is lol

    • @shizaanimations7634
      @shizaanimations7634 4 года назад +12

      Gunther Ultrabolt Novacrunch Okay, while I agree that John is hilarious, using the “well he’s done more than you so you don’t get to talk” argument is childish and stupid.

  • @geegeezlouis86
    @geegeezlouis86 4 года назад +42

    It's honestly so rare that an SNL monologue makes me genuinely laugh but if John's dependable for one thing, it's a laugh

  • @monokumaprincipalofhopespe8295
    @monokumaprincipalofhopespe8295 4 года назад +128

    “He had 12 best friends”
    Weeeeeeelllllll..........

    • @sorv_gvl
      @sorv_gvl 4 года назад +14

      *Judas hides behind the curtain*

    • @epicremarc
      @epicremarc 4 года назад +7

      He had 11 best friends and one frenemie

    • @sonorasgirl
      @sonorasgirl 4 года назад +2

      I cracked up so hard at this 😂. Revisionist history for Judas in action 😂

    • @noahrevan5452
      @noahrevan5452 4 года назад +1

      He had three best friends, eight friends, and a......................Judas.

    • @Silverwind87
      @Silverwind87 4 года назад +3

      Jesus: One of you will betray me.
      Matthew: Is it me, Jesus?
      Jesus: No, it is not you.
      Simon: Is it me, Jesus?
      Jesus: It is not you either.
      Judas: Is it me, Jesus?
      Jesus: iS iT mE jEsUs

  • @partlyironic
    @partlyironic 4 года назад +251

    I honestly have this theory that Make a Wish Foundation kids are amongst the funniest people in the world. I have limited but very compelling data regarding this.

    • @katyscott87
      @katyscott87 4 года назад +8

      Look up Josh Sundquist. I'm pretty sure he got a Make-a-wish granted as a kid. He survived, and now he's a youtuber/ stand-up comedian/ motivational speaker.

    • @CMZIEBARTH
      @CMZIEBARTH 4 года назад +1

      Your comment gets a thumbs up.

    • @hunnysenpai7249
      @hunnysenpai7249 4 года назад +1

      Please share the data

    • @lenaertsjelke
      @lenaertsjelke 4 года назад +35

      So true. I don’t know if you’re a Marvel fan but Chris Hemsworth once told the story of how a Make a Wish Foundation kid came to visit the set of Thor Ragnarok and in the movie there’s a fight between Thor and the Hulk and the kid thought it would be a funny thing if Thor would say “he’s a friend from work” and Chris did just that and they kept it in the movie and has since become one of the more iconic lines in the fandom and overall just made for a very funny moment.

    • @phriedokra6158
      @phriedokra6158 4 года назад +1

      Dying brings out clarity and truth.

  • @rain.enthusiast
    @rain.enthusiast 4 года назад +578

    damn... john mulaney really is popping and everybody does love him

  • @MJR_ATX
    @MJR_ATX 10 месяцев назад +8

    “I wouldn’t wish that on a healthy adult” is a pretty dark joke when you think about it

  • @Polo-rp9hk
    @Polo-rp9hk 4 года назад +512

    He’s really good, he should consider being a stand-up comedian!

    • @zeeshantahir2620
      @zeeshantahir2620 4 года назад +7

      He IS a standup comedian

    • @asianspaghetti2844
      @asianspaghetti2844 4 года назад +48

      @@zeeshantahir2620 r/wooosh

    • @kristinj3339
      @kristinj3339 4 года назад +3

      Prepare for 1000 idiots, dumb dumb ("I was joking! Geeze!")

    • @Ten13Grl
      @Ten13Grl 4 года назад +4

      Ba dum tss. 😆

    • @TheTrimed1
      @TheTrimed1 4 года назад +1

      This is printed in the only t-shirt he owns.

  • @civil_villain
    @civil_villain 4 года назад +119

    I really like John Mulaney. He helped to teach me that I need to know algebra unless I want to lose an eye.

    • @MsGrapeNehi
      @MsGrapeNehi 4 года назад +6

      Civil Villain That story definitely made sense.

    • @civil_villain
      @civil_villain 4 года назад +2

      @@MsGrapeNehi
      Thank you. Thank you for the perfect response :)

  • @eleonoramaciel6273
    @eleonoramaciel6273 4 года назад +10

    the band staring at him like he put the moon and stars in the sky is the most precious thing ever

  • @katediy4563
    @katediy4563 4 года назад +53

    Man! He nailed it when he talked about the Baby Boomer dads. My brother must be studying for a WWII quiz show. That or he's opening a museum in his house.

  • @andreazimmermann5222
    @andreazimmermann5222 4 года назад +134

    One of the best monologues ever. Was laughing so much/hard my stomach hurt.

    • @WK12112
      @WK12112 4 года назад +9

      Andrea Zimmermann I have heard of this man in passing, maybe heard one of his bits on Spotify, but oh my god - this monologue has sold me. He is incredible

    • @Ten13Grl
      @Ten13Grl 4 года назад +3

      @@WK12112 Go watch all of his stuff! He's hilarious!

    • @sunshine3914
      @sunshine3914 4 года назад +1

      Wasn’t able to lol much cause it was just too on target. But the chain joke... omfg ! lmao !

  • @MaddieFish16
    @MaddieFish16 4 года назад +13

    John is super gracious, my friend had health issues (not life and death but serious) and he made time to see her at a show and say hi and I love him all the more for it

  • @elicather8168
    @elicather8168 4 года назад +96

    About the same time he was making the joke about his dad being really emotional, my dad texted me only saying “I love you”, and my first thought was....”who died!?”

  • @xenotiic8356
    @xenotiic8356 4 года назад +54

    "Lin Manuel was my first choice" lmao

  • @hopezzs
    @hopezzs 4 года назад +537

    Who's here because the third ammendment is being invoked in 2020.

    • @Raulbikcube
      @Raulbikcube 4 года назад +12

      God it was so funny just 3 months ago.

    • @19mmch
      @19mmch 4 года назад +1

      I was searching for this.

    • @dudedysseus
      @dudedysseus 4 года назад

      Had the same thought.

    • @Sam-bm6yf
      @Sam-bm6yf 4 года назад +1

      @Kacie Fennell INVOKED not reVOKED

  • @andymoffit8272
    @andymoffit8272 4 года назад +123

    John Mulaney will probably go down as one of the most influential comics of all time and it’s amazing to be here from the beginning

  • @harryr5785
    @harryr5785 4 года назад +39

    “I mean a lot to a small group of people” then I am honored that I am in that group.

  • @RobbieLeffel
    @RobbieLeffel 4 года назад +23

    John told more jokes in 8 minutes than I think most comedians usually tell in a normal half hour set. That was incredible!

  • @haileyholloway7913
    @haileyholloway7913 3 года назад +15

    I love how he laughs at himself too.... 🤣 he's literally the best

  • @JuneYjune
    @JuneYjune 2 года назад +20

    love how everyone in the band found him hilarious in all his minologue clips 😂

    • @rimurutempest4945
      @rimurutempest4945 2 года назад +4

      Yeah, that’s usually how I judge if the people doing the monologue are great, is if the band is also enjoying it, since they’re the only visible frame of reference.

  • @tyde4610
    @tyde4610 4 года назад +22

    I love watching the band members in the back laughing at the jokes

  • @sator_project
    @sator_project 4 года назад +74

    That's the best monologue I've heard on snl

    • @ShawnsterVideos
      @ShawnsterVideos 4 года назад +1

      ...because it actually WAS. monologue ;-) not like the cheap vaudeville SNL does with cast members interrupting to kiss the guest's ass, or to "help" the host..

  • @mahed5807
    @mahed5807 4 года назад +54

    I really only watch SNL monologues when comedians host! Those are the best.

  • @live_ur_adventure
    @live_ur_adventure 4 года назад +384

    John: I mean alot to a small group of people
    Me: bold of you to assume Gen Z doesn't worship you like a strange cult because we relate so strongly

    • @graybirdwoods2264
      @graybirdwoods2264 3 года назад +13

      Yeah, we are not a small group, we are a whole generation who this one man in his thirties means a lot too

    • @YaosaysObjection
      @YaosaysObjection 3 года назад +5

      I'm pretty sure he's got the younger millennials too. Everyone I know whose an American under 30 loves this dude

    • @whateverlolawants
      @whateverlolawants 3 года назад +2

      I think most millennials like him. I was introduced to him about 6 years ago by my ex, who has a very similar sense of humor and was born in 1981. I was born in 1986 and share his stuff with a lot of friends my age. I'm so glad Gen Z loves him!

    • @ayyrar1770
      @ayyrar1770 2 года назад

      Me and my friends are obsessed with him😭

  • @BrynDonovanWriter
    @BrynDonovanWriter 4 года назад +188

    He is always so delightful. So smart and so charming. And wow, that suit and those shoes, what a sharp and original look.

    • @TonyMaynard-SD
      @TonyMaynard-SD 4 года назад +3

      Original?

    • @janetfain6389
      @janetfain6389 4 года назад +1

      Did u see the size of those feet?

    • @DSAK55
      @DSAK55 4 года назад

      He's sporting the Farrakhan look

    • @Ten13Grl
      @Ten13Grl 4 года назад

      @@TonyMaynard-SD it's new to this century, okay?! 😉

    • @tonyattardo9350
      @tonyattardo9350 4 года назад

      Parted hair and a suit and tie. How original.

  • @BekahBrownie
    @BekahBrownie 4 года назад +142

    AND LOOK AT THAT, we can add 3rd Amendment to our End of the World 2020 bingo.

  • @ladychips
    @ladychips 4 года назад +22

    just recently got obsessed with john mulaney. His skits are so funny

  • @JustHereForCats
    @JustHereForCats 4 года назад +50

    "I mean a lot to a tiny group of people"
    But you literally mean the world to us John 😭😭😭

  • @BrophyMC
    @BrophyMC 4 года назад +306

    The army can’t live in your house 😂😂

    • @TonyMaynard-SD
      @TonyMaynard-SD 4 года назад +14

      @thisguy Yeah but I think the joke was about how it was something America was going through that wasn't going to matter or necessarily work correctly in the future, like the 2nd amendment.

    • @ryanlewand6963
      @ryanlewand6963 4 года назад +7

      @@TonyMaynard-SD actually without that, it's very possible during the civil war, and other conflicts, the army could do that. During the revolution, the British would constantly take over peoples farms and houses because that was common practice, it's why that went into the constitution. It's worked out fine still to this day, just like the 2nd.

    • @michaelsmith1262
      @michaelsmith1262 4 года назад +4

      @@TonyMaynard-SD A lot of people are alive that would have been murdered if not for the 2nd amendment. Unless you can magically do away with all guns, the 2nd amendment is absolutely necessary.

    • @no_peace
      @no_peace 4 года назад

      This is like a *forever list*?

  • @chloe_3787
    @chloe_3787 4 года назад +176

    The constitution bit is funny to me because literally just yesterday my Civics and Econ teacher went on for *45 minutes* about how important the 3rd amendment is and I’m over here scratching my head like “and when did women get the right to vote? Oh right, the 19th!”

    • @tatehildyard5332
      @tatehildyard5332 4 года назад +14

      To be fair, we just got done chasing the Redcoats out and we were still very salty about the taxes. The vibe of the Constitutional Convention was basically, "Fuck the Redcoats... but we might as well make and iron out a few alternative policies since we're already here".

    • @MaddDogg316
      @MaddDogg316 4 года назад +5

      Just an FYI, women had a right to vote, however, it was very circumstantial. During the initial few decades of this country's existence, land owners were the ones that had a right to vote. During this same time period, women who owned land were few and far between. The only women that owned land were widows or young girls who were heirs to estates of deceased parents. Women were married at very young ages and if they were widowed, they remarried shortly. Women who did not remarry were seen as a nuisance by the men in power and were often turned into targets of greed economically and socially. As the years went on and the population steadily rose, these situations became more prevalent. So it was enacted that voting was no longer going to be determined by the status of "land owner".

    • @TheAmityElf
      @TheAmityElf 4 года назад +17

      (Well, white women got the right to vote in 1920; everyone else had to wait until 1965-ish.)

    • @zacharykroll7526
      @zacharykroll7526 4 года назад

      The third amendment was invoked last week. Nobody has had to invoke the 19th in over 40 years. Take a wild guess which one is more relevant.

    • @rustylee1836
      @rustylee1836 4 года назад +3

      @@zacharykroll7526 A million billion percent the right for women to vote is the more important and relevant amendment of the two. Glad I'm not smoking what you are. Asbestos, presumably.

  • @chrisstanwood246
    @chrisstanwood246 4 года назад +30

    “You just need the Make a Plan Foundation to find me.”