I've been doing open mics for about 5 years, experiencing all the issues you talked about. Finally I asked myself, "Why am I doing these open mics, anyway? I'm not all that good of a player. Mediocre, at best." It occurred to me that one of the reasons I often come away feeling disappointed in my performance is because I was playing for the wrong reason. I was playing to "show off" some "advanced" stuff I'd been practicing and basically saying "Hey, look what I can do!" But when I get in front of the audience I usually blow it. Not always badly but enough that it leaves me feeling unfulfilled and disappointed. So I finally decided to NOT try to impress anyone. There's an audience out there. What do THEY want? They want to be ENTERTAINED. I know from experience that when I stick to what I can do well (as opposed to trying to show off some tricky licks that are beyond by capability) I get lots of complements and I know people were entertained. The audience gets more enjoyment out of a performance that comes of without a hitch than they get by a performance that comes of awkwardly. Even a performance that may be "technically" mediocre -- but is done well -- is more satisfying to the audience than a performance that makes them feel as awkward as the performance itself. Anyway, that's just my 2-cents for what it might be worth. Of course, given inflation these days, it might no be worth much. LOL!
Not only do I forget when I'm jamming with others, I'll study one of your videos step by step, and then forget the entire concept a week later. Of course being a geezer now doesn't help. Thanks for all you do Brian.
One thing i have learned over the years playing in bands is when you make a mistake or you think its not going great most people in the audience dont pick up on it anyway - i’ve lost count of the times when i ‘ve messed up and people have said well it sounded good to me - so don’t beat yourselves up people we all make mistakes even the greats - great topic by the way there should be more stuff like this - Great job.
Yes sir even if you mess up if you own it most won’t even notice unless it’s a really nasty interval and even then if you bring it home the listeners ears will accept it
Totally agree with you. In fact, it happened to me a month ago. I was playing a Peter Green solo which I knew it perfectly. But I did mess up a few notes. I knew it but nobody else noticed it. And my audience was full of guitarists!. It was reassuring to know that you can mess up and most people don’t even noticed.
I played innumerable solos in many gigs. Some of my worst got the most compliments. I once played a 30-second solo flawlessly at a crowded club gig. I mean, it was freakin’ brilliant. I got off stage expecting to hear compliments. Only one guy said anything: the totally wasted guy who spent the entire solo doing the splits in his jeans. With a beer in one hand. The audience is not there for our guitar stylings (unless you are BB King), more for the songs and energy and show, and at jams people generally wait for others to finish so they can play. So at bottom, the pressure is in your head. You learn that in time.
I’ve been playing guitar over 55 years and this is the soundest advice I have ever heard. Agree that we are our own harshest critic. Chill and enjoy the ride…
I'm a beginner to intermediate guitar player but a 10 handicap golfer. In competition golf a very big key is: "Don't have too many swing thoughts. 2 - 3 at the most." I like what you said about not trying to do too many things at once on the guitar.
Big problem with jamming also is lack of warmup, often you are coming in cold and I find the difference huge. I’m twice as good after 10 to 15 mins of warming up with some scales or even just noodling to loosen your hands and engage your brain.
Warm up for an hr or two before you head to a session . It’s what I always try to do. And works ok. Your not smoking hot or anything . But your mentally ready .
Your so right Nick, you don't take walk in a gym and start pumping heavyweights or take a test without studying. Warmups go with everything we do. I always say I have good days and bad days on guitar but if I look back, most of those bad days I picked up the guitar and started playing instead of warming up first. Then on the other hand being put on the spot is a lot of nerves overtaking your brain, getting in the way. Happy warmups, lol.
I've played guitar and performed in bands for many years and aside from the predictable jitters at big gigs or whatever I've been able to pull things together. Then about a year ago i decided to get very dedicated to playing walking bass and began taking lessons from a very capable and accomplished teacher. I practice, get prepared, feel confident between lessons (on Zoom, usually once a month) but I have yet to play without a total train wreck when it's time for me to play the assigned material for my teacher. He's really gracious about it, understanding, has told me this happens to just about everyone, and that he knows I can play. He "knows" because I have video recorded myself and sent him stuff after getting the assignments under my fingers. At my lessons it's as though amnesia sets in and I can't find my way around the fretboard, which of course is really disappointing and embarrassing. I'm not going to give up because I really like what we're working on and I like my teacher and his great attitude. But wow! It's pretty sucky and I'd sure like to just get over it. I've heard the same from others who are accomplished musicians but get really nervous when put on the spot with their teachers or an audience. That doesn't make it any easier to handle, but I guess it is what it is. Thanks for addressing this, Brian.
Thanks Brian. This very thing happened to me yesterday. I had some spare time and was located right next door to a local music shop, so I walked in and started messing around with some of the guitars, but when I sat down to play I forgot just about everything. I'm glad to hear that I'm normal; it's quite encouraging.🙂
I would say music shops are the worst place to try and showcase any skills. Not least because none of the equipment is your own and it is intimidating to be surrounded by the seasoned musicians who work in them.
You are spot on with keeping it simple. I’ve been going to a jazz jam night for a couple months and have found that when I play one or two pentatonic boxes, kept the phrasing simple, repeat or do call and response lines, I walk away feeling better and hearing compliments than when I try to run up and down the neck. Also, it’s good to reference the melody or head of the song in your solo. So many great solos are just embellishments on the melody with trials and passing notes thrown in. Glad you are talking about this Brian!
Many years ago I took a public speaking course, first thing was know your topic, second was breath, 3rd was practice with a mirror. All these things relate to guitar playing in public. Play what you know, take a breath (pause), and your idea record yourself (mirror). Great video Brian, I am going to do it.
Also spend time playing in front of a mirror. It helps take your eyes off the guitar while playing, let's you check posture and, most importantly, you can practice guitar faces.
Your very wise sir, you nailed it, l like your ideas on how to combat the inevitable times we are asked to "play something", but more so hearing you talk on it is knowing others struggle at this as well
Can't tell you how much I appreciate your lessons and suggestions. I have been playing guitar for over 50 years and this video is a must see for a problem everyone wrestles with. Thanks for your dedication and for being there. MB
I'm forever the rookie, but with ME, I KNOW IT'S ALL ABOUT fear of blowing it WHICH CAUSES ME TO BLOW IT, even being among a couple friends, UNLESS I've picked around on the guitar in front of the same people prior, now knowing they DON'T expect anything special from me, then I can only do good, better then last time. Same reason I choke at any kind of public speaking....turn red, fear fear fear..stage fright etc....the brain / emotions turn into a mush of fear and forgetfulness.
Thanks for this. I'm in the middle of recording an audition video and it's hard to not get frustrated when it seems like I've somehow forgotten everything I've been practicing for the past 6 months. I'll definitely these things into account for when I practice and then for when I record or perform.
I only play at home, alone. I hope to play with others soon, and I'm glad for this video, because I am concerned that I might forgot everything. Here's my mind strategy that I plan on employing to sidestep that potential disaster ... 1. Most other players will be more wrapped up in how THEY sound, than how I sound...so I need not worry that they'll be hyper focused on micro analyzing me. 2. Rest in the musical basics...in tune, steady rhythm (like the video said, "keep it simple") Enjoy letting them shine, rather than worry over trying to prove myself This might not be the right approach for everybody, but knowing myself, I think it'll work for me
Just want to say I take more out of your lessons than any other teacher on RUclips thank u for what u do. I hope to be able to buy your lessons soon thank u again
This is so true. It is just like not knowing what to say to a pretty girl, I think. If you're really excited, thinking gets hard. I would say that feeling this way is a great reason to keep after it! Make that pretty girl smile! Ya just gotta try to relax, and remember being able to play at all is magic to a lot of people.
I am so glad you touched on this Brian. I was playing the other night and completely forgot about 75 percent of everything I knew for about a minute. Felt terrible. This video really helps! Thank you.
It’s a tough topic and what you said was so good. Egos are very fragile when it comes to performing and it’s never easy to take criticism. There are musicians unfortunately that enjoy pointing out your flaws/mistakes at any given point and it takes resolve and commitment to keep on pushing forward in your playing. You find out early how much you love playing guitar when your discouraged from recording/peoples comments, but you keep on picking it up and playing. That’s what separates the love for the instrument and just the passing interest. Thank you Brian for your contributions to all us that are at different levels but love the guitar
Thanks for covering this. Mistakes are bound to happen... even the greats talk about this... but they all just move on. Pat Metheny talked about this in one of his interviews. He says he's always striving for that perfect night when everything falls together as planned and even he says it's rare .... but he always strives for it. That's what makes him so amazing. Don't sweat the mistakes. It's part of being human and the audience rarely notices.
This used to haunt me all the time but these days I don't even let it be a thing. It basically doesn't exist for me anymore. I just sink into the song and do my thing. It's like a meditation.
Always amazing how different something sounds when you wait and go back to listen to it. I find I am a lot more objective when I listen the next day. Good tip!
Dear Brian, as you know I have been going to blues jams for about a year and this happens to me so much. Thank you so much for your advice. The beauty of learning from you is how relatable your guidance is. Everything you say in this video is so accurate the situation and the proposed solutions. Thank you and grateful for your teachings always
Awesome topic, great advice. And timely for me. Seems timely for a lot of people here, actually :). I go to Bluegrass jams and have hardly ever taken an instrumental break. Last time I was there I joked that I'd host the next jam in my bedroom. Cause I'm amazing when I play there :) The only thing I'd add, that has worked at times for me, is to really REALLY know the song (songs) I think I'm going to play. Educators call it "over learning". I've heard musicians say, you're not ready to play it on stage until you're sick of playing it. Thanks for this Brian. Your teaching is just excellent, btw, and this video is a real shot in the arm for many of us.
Some great advice Brian, thank you. This has happened to me a lot, and still does. For some reason, mostly when trying out guitars in shops. Everything I've ever learnt just goes out of the window. My only way of saving my embarrassment is to not mention that I've actually been learning the guitar for many years. I walk out thinking it's better that people think I'm a complete novice than I'm not very good.
Thanks so much for addressing this and for your advice. I’ve played for 45 years and I’ve never heard anyone really talk about this issue. Very helpful 👍🏼
Loved this video. I can absolutely relate to it. I’m 65 and have been playing guitar for 45 years and still growing as a musician. Thank you for sharing. Will be watching and learning from West Virginia. ❤️🎸
Wow, I thought this only happened to me. I love these "chat lessons." They accomplish much more than a new improv. Reality just hit me in the face. When I play simple, people tell me I was really great tonight, but I always feel like there is a guitar player in the crowd saying "he is a fraud." That's when I start forcing one of my hot licks, and it sounds terrible. I don't play it right, and it sounds forced. Keep it simple!
Nailed it, Brian. In a jam, or as the next commenter said, in a guitar shop, one can forget everything. But you gotta do it! You’re right about recording - it usually does sound better an hour later. Great post. Bruce D.
When I think I've mastered a song, I record myself and generally, it takes me many takes before I manage to complete the performance. It tells me, I need to practice more. A former guitar teacher told me, to progress, you have to perform - and to perform you have to know that you'll get it right first time at least most of the time. The three most important things to getting good enough are 1. Practice 2. Practice 3. Practice.
I think practice is extremely important but, one can never practice enough. Sometimes, you just have to take the bull by the horns and wing it and be willing to look like a fool - being fearless is at least as important in my opinion. Easier said than done of course :)
Excellent video that touches on an important topic. One should always differentiate between practice and live playing and view them as totally different things. In my experience, when you try and specifically play something that you’ve been practicing during a session or live gig, it rarely works. Why? Because it is too fresh and has not been truly internalized. If you just play in the moment without thinking, sometimes years later, what you practiced will manifest itself in some form that you probably didn’t expect. So what I do when I’m practicing something and I think it’s really cool, I say to myself “yeah, that sounds really cool. It will be awesome when it comes out in my real playing in a couple of months or years.” I’m not even going to try to work it into my real playing because I know it will just happen and when it does, it will be my own.
Great subject.I’ve gone to the same blues jam three times. The first time, I came away feeling pretty good about myself. Got compliments, some positive attention, etc. The second time was not so good. During jams you don’t know who or what you’re going to be paired with, not that I’m blaming. The third time started out ok, but when the volume started to increase, I couldn’t hear myself.When this happens, instinct kicks in, and you start hitting the strings harder. At this point all subtlety and control is gone. Like you mentioned, I’ve put way too much time and effort to ever coming away from a situation like that feeling like an amateur, especially since I know what I’m capable of. Fortunately, I’ve been playing a long time, and I’ve had periods when I couldn’t play with any inspiration even at home under ideal circumstances, but I know this happens, and it’ll come around again. Thanks for a great and usually un mentioned topic.
Well Brian - you,ve singled out the issue that we all have. I feel that there is a link with self-confidence. Always wishing that your performance were as polished as the practice. Very helpful. Thanks.
I have had these "bonne head me" moments. So I'm glad you made this clip and intend to use it in details because I have confidence in you Brian. As they saying goes the devil is in the details and us guitarists are well aware of that. Thanks
Brian, ALWAYS great, useful advice. You come across personally as a modest and vulnerable EVERYMAN, and yet your guitar skills are phenomenal, and where EVERYMAN strives to reach. Thank you for yet another thoughtful, insightful, and really helpful video.
My original playing nemesis was the record button. Feel good, sound good, hit record, fall apart. Performance anxiety. It plagued me in gymnastics in my youth (until it didn't), it plagued me as a performing juggler--always--and it plagued me recording (until it didn't). But as soon as I think about it, I'm certain to make a mistake...and yet nobody I let hear it notices, even the worst egregious errors. I know anyone musical would. But the bottom line--you gotta have fun and keep plugging away. Good topic--and I always love your honesty. Stay Well Groovy One!
I feel like this too and when im in a guitar store i dont like playing infront of people because im insecure about my playing i dont think im a good enough player.
The perfect subject Brian but that happens to myself too. Alot of it is mood and stress and anxiety makes you forget because you can't think straight. So now I want to hear you, thanks 🙏 Brian.
Spot on. I started playing in a band only recently, one gig so far. But this is exactly what I did and went great. Keep it simple, do your homework (know the songs) and just follow along. Actually, in a band settings I found the less you play the better it sounds. Thanks Brian for all the tips, I'll try the recording one for the next gig!
Thank you for this, Brian (paid subscriber!). I've gotten a lot from your lessons, but every time I face the mic at the club I go to, I invariably forget chords and/or lyrics, and then I try to hurry up and get through it, which just adds to the mess I'm making. I've been trying to find ways to "calm it down," without much success. Your ideas are terrific, and I'll take them to heart!
I didn't think a video like this existed, eventually I don't feel alone and like a dufus. I think my problem is trying to "silently" impress, then I go out on a limb and things just fade into the ether, forgetting riffs and basic things. What I learnt from this video and comments is, self talk before playing, remind myself ... Keep it simple, don't impress... Thanks for sharing this video.
Dear Brian, you're a genius with both words and music. Thanks for this reassuring and practical reflection. I'm that guy! I can feel fluent and capable when playing alone, but if asked to play for or with someone I just stiffen up and blank out. I'm learning from golf that when out on the course with buddies is the time to play within myself and NOT try to impress anyone (including myself!). Keep it simple, allow the time, don't rush, trust myself and my learning. I'll definitely give your one shot exercise a go.
For sure I've had more bad nights than good, but both the bad and the good keep me working at it. Good advice, I've gone back to recordings I did months/years ago that I never listened to and say, "hey, I did real good there" but of course forgot it all and can't reproduce most of it because I am always moving to new ideas. It is all part of the journey though and it all contributes to the collective progression of my skill set.
Hey, I can so identify with your description in begining of this video. It's exactly my experience. I'm only able to do something with a guitar when I'm on my own.
Great content. Here's another thing that helps me out: lower your standards. That is, practice to a higher level than you actually expect to be able to perform. Kind of like saying shoot for the moon, you will be a lot happier wherever you end up.
Great video here. I was just curious to see what you said, but I guess I figured some of this out once I started playing in public. I was gonna second another post that talks about being comfortable making mistakes, but not stopping! Maybe the crowd picked up, maybe they didn’t, but as long as you don’t stop, it’s never too bad lol. Good pointers, thanks!
Perfect timing Brian. I was starting to believe after all the time and practice I have done, that maybe I'm just not the guitarist that I thought I was. I've been pretty down about it to the point of giving up. Even though I get positive comments about my playing . Truthfully I think They're being nice at times? Anyway you have given me a 2nd wind! I was a member of Active Melody for a few years and learned a lot from you. I'm going to rejoin because your a great teacher and can read minds too! lol Jim
Those were great suggestions. I'm going to put at least some of them into practice. But I have one more: Practice loud. As loud as you think you can get away with. Too often when we're doing our "bedroom" practice or jamming to songs or whatever, we're playing at a low enough volume that our own, shall we say, less-than-stellar playing is politely almost in the background. We can be easy on ourselves. "That didn't sound too bad." Then you show up at a jam or gig and you're loud and up front and distracted by all the stuff going on that you're not used to and maybe you've got a bit of stage fright going on and *_POW!!!_* You forget how to play. Practicing loud will accustom you to the sound pressure level you're going to be dealing with when it's for real.
This happens to me during my lessons with my tutor. He asks me to demonstrate what I learned last week and even though I practice at home all week I just lose it.
Thank you very much for that insight. I always thought it just me because I haven't played live very much over the years but just started in the last few years.
I’ve re-discovered songs I wrote and recorded from years ago. Some impress me as how good they are and others don’t impress me at all. Thing is, we’re musicians and are far more critical of ourselves and the music we listen to. Have mercy.
Had an acoustic gig two weeks back and had to drop my fingerpicking and just strum out. But now I have my own personal psychiatrist, this is so awesome. Your advice, so simple but so effective. Thanks from Devon, UK.
I can relate to this - I don't jam with others or play in public at all, but I once had the opportunity to record a solo in a proper recording studio, where my son works as a recording engineer and producer. I chose a solo I already knew and could play well, but it took me over 40 takes to get something I was even remotely happy with, and even then we ended up splicing two takes together for the final video!
Very good video on a very pertinent subject - Thanks! As an additional advice, if I may, I would say that analyzing your playing on the spot is another way to just fall apart because you are being over careful....and then you trip.
Hi Brian. From Spain i'd like to thank you for your channel.For me Is the best i know by far. You touch not only my favourite playing style but also my inner questions like the one you address in this video. Flawless job!! Congrats!!
I'm watching this video just after getting home from band practice, and you nailed it. Today was one of those days, where everything clicked and sounded amazing. But then, at other times, I also feel defeated because I feel I have no idea what I'm doing. I'll try this one-shot exercise.
"go back in an hour and listen to what you recorded, and it is likely to sound better than you thought" - Nope. After listening to myself I b like: "Keep trying, slow way down, do it over and over."
Thanks Brian, good clip. I'm still just a home studio player, but I know exactly what you mean. Any time I have sat down with another musician, my mind almost goes blank, especially if they start riffing in a genre I don't normally play in. So I think it's important (at least in the beginning) to a) play with someone who's into the same style and b) stick with a few standards in that style.
I have been recording myself and I do get little surprises at my playing like you said; I think you have to hear yourself the way others do, because while doing it you can't be fully conscious of what you are doing. THE SAME THING APPLIES TO EVERYTHING YOU DO, THE PERSON WHO IS LOOKING ON, ALWAYS SEES THINGS THAT THE DOER DOES'NT SEE; so when you record yourself ,you become the one who is looking on.
Brian, great subject presentation. Thank you. I can relate. I think keeping the song simple for a performance is a good start. When I am alone working on an original or a cover sometimes I pay to much attention to the details of every part of it's structure. Sometimes this can actually over complicate my ability to perform it smoothly especially in front of people. So, probably its better for me to start out with a simple arrangement and build the details I invision into the composition after creating a foundation that works.
Every Sunday playing lead for a large church. Performance then posted for the world to see. Its overwhelming at times. Practice builds confidence and with some prayer and help from the Holy Spirit doesn't hurt either... :-)
Great topic Brian. I've had that happen when I go to my local guitar shop to pick up one of my guitars that I'd dropped off to have some work done. The guy says to play it some to make sure I'm satisfied with the work he's done. I sit there and nothing comes to mind. I can't play two chords together. lol
Not only do I forget what I know, I tend to fumble through what I do know when I play with others. When I was taking private lessons, I could become pretty efficient with an assignment but when I went to play it for my teacher it was sloppy. It’s frustrating to be able to play something but then it doesn’t go well when it’s time to showcase your talent. I once had the same problem with a trumpet solo, rehearsal went very well but I was disappointed in the performance.
Wow.... you said what I would never tell anyone else....most other listeners would say good job,,,,but I say thanks and slink away in a walk of shame knowing I totally blew it, lol. Thanks for the confidence booster, and a good tip to be better.
Great advice Brian! In most cases, less can be better. Simple phrasing with accuracy is very pleasing to those listening. Mistakes many times are not noticed, at least that I s what my wife says 😉👍
This is me, so thanks for trying to make me feel better Brian, however I'm not sure that I believe that you experience the same. I believe that the only way to overcome this, is to play with others until the self awareness disappears and your natural playing comes through..... this however is easier said than done and I am in awe of you players who have achieved this.
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I've been doing open mics for about 5 years, experiencing all the issues you talked about. Finally I asked myself, "Why am I doing these open mics, anyway? I'm not all that good of a player. Mediocre, at best." It occurred to me that one of the reasons I often come away feeling disappointed in my performance is because I was playing for the wrong reason. I was playing to "show off" some "advanced" stuff I'd been practicing and basically saying "Hey, look what I can do!" But when I get in front of the audience I usually blow it. Not always badly but enough that it leaves me feeling unfulfilled and disappointed. So I finally decided to NOT try to impress anyone. There's an audience out there. What do THEY want? They want to be ENTERTAINED. I know from experience that when I stick to what I can do well (as opposed to trying to show off some tricky licks that are beyond by capability) I get lots of complements and I know people were entertained. The audience gets more enjoyment out of a performance that comes of without a hitch than they get by a performance that comes of awkwardly. Even a performance that may be "technically" mediocre -- but is done well -- is more satisfying to the audience than a performance that makes them feel as awkward as the performance itself. Anyway, that's just my 2-cents for what it might be worth. Of course, given inflation these days, it might no be worth much. LOL!
Not only do I forget when I'm jamming with others, I'll study one of your videos step by step, and then forget the entire concept a week later. Of course being a
geezer now doesn't help. Thanks for all you do Brian.
One thing i have learned over the years playing in bands is when you make a mistake or you think its not going great most people in the audience dont pick up on it anyway - i’ve lost count of the times when i ‘ve messed up and people have said well it sounded good to me - so don’t beat yourselves up people we all make mistakes even the greats - great topic by the way there should be more stuff like this - Great job.
Yes sir even if you mess up if you own it most won’t even notice unless it’s a really nasty interval and even then if you bring it home the listeners ears will accept it
that's a surefire way to be mediocre all your life.
criticize yourself. Hard
Totally agree with you. In fact, it happened to me a month ago. I was playing a Peter Green solo which I knew it perfectly. But I did mess up a few notes. I knew it but nobody else noticed it. And my audience was full of guitarists!. It was reassuring to know that you can mess up and most people don’t even noticed.
BB King was once asked if he ever listened to his own recordings and he said Heck No I would hear all the mistakes I made.
I played innumerable solos in many gigs. Some of my worst got the most compliments. I once played a 30-second solo flawlessly at a crowded club gig. I mean, it was freakin’ brilliant. I got off stage expecting to hear compliments. Only one guy said anything: the totally wasted guy who spent the entire solo doing the splits in his jeans. With a beer in one hand. The audience is not there for our guitar stylings (unless you are BB King), more for the songs and energy and show, and at jams people generally wait for others to finish so they can play. So at bottom, the pressure is in your head. You learn that in time.
I’ve been playing guitar over 55 years and this is the soundest advice I have ever heard. Agree that we are our own harshest critic. Chill and enjoy the ride…
I'm a beginner to intermediate guitar player but a 10 handicap golfer. In competition golf a very big key is: "Don't have too many swing thoughts. 2 - 3 at the most." I like what you said about not trying to do too many things at once on the guitar.
Big problem with jamming also is lack of warmup, often you are coming in cold and I find the difference huge. I’m twice as good after 10 to 15 mins of warming up with some scales or even just noodling to loosen your hands and engage your brain.
Warm up for an hr or two before you head to a session . It’s what I always try to do. And works ok. Your not smoking hot or anything . But your mentally ready .
I'm not a fast player by any means and I too find taking 10-15 minutes of warning up helps me tremendously, but to each their own.
Your so right Nick, you don't take walk in a gym and start pumping heavyweights or take a test without studying. Warmups go with everything we do. I always say I have good days and bad days on guitar but if I look back, most of those bad days I picked up the guitar and started playing instead of warming up first. Then on the other hand being put on the spot is a lot of nerves overtaking your brain, getting in the way. Happy warmups, lol.
This is one of the most reassuring videos I’ve ever watched. Practical suggestions too. Thank you.
I've played guitar and performed in bands for many years and aside from the predictable jitters at big gigs or whatever I've been able to pull things together. Then about a year ago i decided to get very dedicated to playing walking bass and began taking lessons from a very capable and accomplished teacher. I practice, get prepared, feel confident between lessons (on Zoom, usually once a month) but I have yet to play without a total train wreck when it's time for me to play the assigned material for my teacher. He's really gracious about it, understanding, has told me this happens to just about everyone, and that he knows I can play. He "knows" because I have video recorded myself and sent him stuff after getting the assignments under my fingers. At my lessons it's as though amnesia sets in and I can't find my way around the fretboard, which of course is really disappointing and embarrassing. I'm not going to give up because I really like what we're working on and I like my teacher and his great attitude. But wow! It's pretty sucky and I'd sure like to just get over it. I've heard the same from others who are accomplished musicians but get really nervous when put on the spot with their teachers or an audience. That doesn't make it any easier to handle, but I guess it is what it is. Thanks for addressing this, Brian.
Thanks Brian. This very thing happened to me yesterday. I had some spare time and was located right next door to a local music shop, so I walked in and started messing around with some of the guitars, but when I sat down to play I forgot just about everything. I'm glad to hear that I'm normal; it's quite encouraging.🙂
I, too, suffer from "guitar shop amnesia."
Same here.
I would say music shops are the worst place to try and showcase any skills. Not least because none of the equipment is your own and it is intimidating to be surrounded by the seasoned musicians who work in them.
Yeah especially when your as crap on the guitar as most youtube guitarlearners...Nothing wrong with learning though .@@geoffguitars
You are spot on with keeping it simple. I’ve been going to a jazz jam night for a couple months and have found that when I play one or two pentatonic boxes, kept the phrasing simple, repeat or do call and response lines, I walk away feeling better and hearing compliments than when I try to run up and down the neck.
Also, it’s good to reference the melody or head of the song in your solo. So many great solos are just embellishments on the melody with trials and passing notes thrown in.
Glad you are talking about this Brian!
Fantastic video Brian, thank you, it definitely hit home with a lot of us by the looks of the comments.
Many years ago I took a public speaking course, first thing was know your topic, second was breath, 3rd was practice with a mirror. All these things relate to guitar playing in public. Play what you know, take a breath (pause), and your idea record yourself (mirror). Great video Brian, I am going to do it.
Also spend time playing in front of a mirror. It helps take your eyes off the guitar while playing, let's you check posture and, most importantly, you can practice guitar faces.
Your very wise sir, you nailed it, l like your ideas on how to combat the inevitable times we are asked to "play something", but more so hearing you talk on it is knowing others struggle at this as well
Can't tell you how much I appreciate your lessons and suggestions. I have been playing guitar for over 50 years and this video is a must see for a problem everyone wrestles with. Thanks for your dedication and for being there. MB
Amen, Brian! Very encouraging. I usually fall apart like a cheap watch, but now I feel a little more empowered! Way to go!
I'm forever the rookie, but with ME, I KNOW IT'S ALL ABOUT fear of blowing it WHICH CAUSES ME TO BLOW IT, even being among a couple friends, UNLESS I've picked around on the guitar in front of the same people prior, now knowing they DON'T expect anything special from me, then I can only do good, better then last time. Same reason I choke at any kind of public speaking....turn red, fear fear fear..stage fright etc....the brain / emotions turn into a mush of fear and forgetfulness.
Thanks for this.
I'm in the middle of recording an audition video and it's hard to not get frustrated when it seems like I've somehow forgotten everything I've been practicing for the past 6 months.
I'll definitely these things into account for when I practice and then for when I record or perform.
I only play at home, alone.
I hope to play with others soon, and I'm glad for this video, because I am concerned that I might forgot everything.
Here's my mind strategy that I plan on employing to sidestep that potential disaster ...
1. Most other players will be more wrapped up in how THEY sound, than how I sound...so I need not worry that they'll be hyper focused on micro analyzing me.
2. Rest in the musical basics...in tune, steady rhythm (like the video said, "keep it simple")
Enjoy letting them shine, rather than worry over trying to prove myself
This might not be the right approach for everybody, but knowing myself, I think it'll work for me
Just want to say I take more out of your lessons than any other teacher on RUclips thank u for what u do. I hope to be able to buy your lessons soon thank u again
This is so true. It is just like not knowing what to say to a pretty girl, I think. If you're really excited, thinking gets hard. I would say that feeling this way is a great reason to keep after it! Make that pretty girl smile! Ya just gotta try to relax, and remember being able to play at all is magic to a lot of people.
I am so glad you touched on this Brian. I was playing the other night and completely forgot about 75 percent of everything I knew for about a minute. Felt terrible. This video really helps! Thank you.
You speak how I feel. Just needed to be reminded of it. Less is more. Thanks man. Love and peace x
It’s a tough topic and what you said was so good. Egos are very fragile when it comes to performing and it’s never easy to take criticism. There are musicians unfortunately that enjoy pointing out your flaws/mistakes at any given point and it takes resolve and commitment to keep on pushing forward in your playing. You find out early how much you love playing guitar when your discouraged from recording/peoples comments, but you keep on picking it up and playing. That’s what separates the love for the instrument and just the passing interest. Thank you Brian for your contributions to all us that are at different levels but love the guitar
As always, thanks for another great lesson
Thanks for covering this. Mistakes are bound to happen... even the greats talk about this... but they all just move on. Pat Metheny talked about this in one of his interviews. He says he's always striving for that perfect night when everything falls together as planned and even he says it's rare .... but he always strives for it. That's what makes him so amazing. Don't sweat the mistakes. It's part of being human and the audience rarely notices.
This used to haunt me all the time but these days I don't even let it be a thing. It basically doesn't exist for me anymore. I just sink into the song and do my thing. It's like a meditation.
Always amazing how different something sounds when you wait and go back to listen to it. I find I am a lot more objective when I listen the next day. Good tip!
Thank you for your insight Brian
Dear Brian, as you know I have been going to blues jams for about a year and this happens to me so much. Thank you so much for your advice. The beauty of learning from you is how relatable your guidance is. Everything you say in this video is so accurate the situation and the proposed solutions. Thank you and grateful for your teachings always
Awesome topic, great advice. And timely for me. Seems timely for a lot of people here, actually :). I go to Bluegrass jams and have hardly ever taken an instrumental break. Last time I was there I joked that I'd host the next jam in my bedroom. Cause I'm amazing when I play there :)
The only thing I'd add, that has worked at times for me, is to really REALLY know the song (songs) I think I'm going to play. Educators call it "over learning". I've heard musicians say, you're not ready to play it on stage until you're sick of playing it.
Thanks for this Brian. Your teaching is just excellent, btw, and this video is a real shot in the arm for many of us.
That's a good point I will play a song I'm learning over and over for a couple of weeks until the next song strikes a chord
Finally someone has taken the time to explain this feeling and you just mess up when you play with others. Thanks Brian
Ron
Some great advice Brian, thank you. This has happened to me a lot, and still does. For some reason, mostly when trying out guitars in shops. Everything I've ever learnt just goes out of the window. My only way of saving my embarrassment is to not mention that I've actually been learning the guitar for many years. I walk out thinking it's better that people think I'm a complete novice than I'm not very good.
Thanks so much for addressing this and for your advice. I’ve played for 45 years and I’ve never heard anyone really talk about this issue. Very helpful 👍🏼
You’re exactly right Brian forgetting is a stumbling block for all of us.
Loved this video. I can absolutely relate to it. I’m 65 and have been playing guitar for 45 years and still growing as a musician. Thank you for sharing. Will be watching and learning from West Virginia. ❤️🎸
Wow, I thought this only happened to me. I love these "chat lessons." They accomplish much more than a new improv. Reality just hit me in the face. When I play simple, people tell me I was really great tonight, but I always feel like there is a guitar player in the crowd saying "he is a fraud." That's when I start forcing one of my hot licks, and it sounds terrible. I don't play it right, and it sounds forced. Keep it simple!
This is a great topic that has affected my self esteem as a musician many times. Thanks for addressing it and reinforcing that we all get this.
Nailed it, Brian. In a jam, or as the next commenter said, in a guitar shop, one can forget everything. But you gotta do it!
You’re right about recording - it usually does sound better an hour later.
Great post.
Bruce D.
When I think I've mastered a song, I record myself and generally, it takes me many takes before I manage to complete the performance. It tells me, I need to practice more. A former guitar teacher told me, to progress, you have to perform - and to perform you have to know that you'll get it right first time at least most of the time. The three most important things to getting good enough are 1. Practice 2. Practice 3. Practice.
I think practice is extremely important but, one can never practice enough. Sometimes, you just have to take the bull by the horns and wing it and be willing to look like a fool - being fearless is at least as important in my opinion. Easier said than done of course :)
You hit the nail on the head. This is golden advice for all, even seasoned players. Thank you so much for spelling it out!
Excellent video that touches on an important topic. One should always differentiate between practice and live playing and view them as totally different things. In my experience, when you try and specifically play something that you’ve been practicing during a session or live gig, it rarely works. Why? Because it is too fresh and has not been truly internalized. If you just play in the moment without thinking, sometimes years later, what you practiced will manifest itself in some form that you probably didn’t expect. So what I do when I’m practicing something and I think it’s really cool, I say to myself “yeah, that sounds really cool. It will be awesome when it comes out in my real playing in a couple of months or years.” I’m not even going to try to work it into my real playing because I know it will just happen and when it does, it will be my own.
Brian...thank you for this. You are definitely the best guitar guy online by far. I am in Ireland and I am a premium member..
Great subject.I’ve gone to the same blues jam three times. The first time, I came away feeling pretty good about myself. Got compliments, some positive attention, etc. The second time was not so good. During jams you don’t know who or what you’re going to be paired with, not that I’m blaming. The third time started out ok, but when the volume started to increase, I couldn’t hear myself.When this happens, instinct kicks in, and you start hitting the strings harder. At this point all subtlety and control is gone. Like you mentioned, I’ve put way too much time and effort to ever coming away from a situation like that feeling like an amateur, especially since I know what I’m capable of. Fortunately, I’ve been playing a long time, and I’ve had periods when I couldn’t play with any inspiration even at home under ideal circumstances, but I know this happens, and it’ll come around again. Thanks for a great and usually un mentioned topic.
Well Brian - you,ve singled out the issue that we all have. I feel that there is a link with self-confidence. Always wishing that your performance were as polished as the practice. Very helpful. Thanks.
Sometimes the performance is better than the practice..... especially if you play with some good people ☺️
I have had these "bonne head me" moments. So I'm glad you made this clip and intend to use it in details because I have confidence in you Brian. As they saying goes the devil is in the details and us guitarists are well aware of that. Thanks
Brian, ALWAYS great, useful advice. You come across personally as a modest and vulnerable EVERYMAN, and yet your guitar skills are phenomenal, and where EVERYMAN strives to reach. Thank you for yet another thoughtful, insightful, and really helpful video.
My original playing nemesis was the record button. Feel good, sound good, hit record, fall apart. Performance anxiety. It plagued me in gymnastics in my youth (until it didn't), it plagued me as a performing juggler--always--and it plagued me recording (until it didn't). But as soon as I think about it, I'm certain to make a mistake...and yet nobody I let hear it notices, even the worst egregious errors. I know anyone musical would. But the bottom line--you gotta have fun and keep plugging away. Good topic--and I always love your honesty. Stay Well Groovy One!
I feel like this too and when im in a guitar store i dont like playing infront of people because im insecure about my playing i dont think im a good enough player.
You nailed it! Thanks, I play guitar, drums, keyboard, vocals I have experienced that scenario on all of these instruments!
The perfect subject Brian but that happens to myself too. Alot of it is mood and stress and anxiety makes you forget because you can't think straight. So now I want to hear you, thanks 🙏 Brian.
Spot on. I started playing in a band only recently, one gig so far. But this is exactly what I did and went great. Keep it simple, do your homework (know the songs) and just follow along. Actually, in a band settings I found the less you play the better it sounds. Thanks Brian for all the tips, I'll try the recording one for the next gig!
I'm so glad this was brought up. It is totally depressing when this happens! I didn't touch my guitar for three weeks after one of these situations.
Thank you for this, Brian (paid subscriber!). I've gotten a lot from your lessons, but every time I face the mic at the club I go to, I invariably forget chords and/or lyrics, and then I try to hurry up and get through it, which just adds to the mess I'm making. I've been trying to find ways to "calm it down," without much success. Your ideas are terrific, and I'll take them to heart!
100% on point. I’ve been there. Great video
I didn't think a video like this existed, eventually I don't feel alone and like a dufus. I think my problem is trying to "silently" impress, then I go out on a limb and things just fade into the ether, forgetting riffs and basic things. What I learnt from this video and comments is, self talk before playing, remind myself ... Keep it simple, don't impress... Thanks for sharing this video.
Dear Brian, you're a genius with both words and music. Thanks for this reassuring and practical reflection.
I'm that guy! I can feel fluent and capable when playing alone, but if asked to play for or with someone I just stiffen up and blank out.
I'm learning from golf that when out on the course with buddies is the time to play within myself and NOT try to impress anyone (including myself!). Keep it simple, allow the time, don't rush, trust myself and my learning.
I'll definitely give your one shot exercise a go.
You are so sympathic and so encouraging towards a regular problem, thanks
Great point especially at my age when forgetting things becomes a modus operandi.
For sure I've had more bad nights than good, but both the bad and the good keep me working at it.
Good advice, I've gone back to recordings I did months/years ago that I never listened to and say, "hey, I did real good there" but of course forgot it all and can't reproduce most of it because I am always moving to new ideas. It is all part of the journey though and it all contributes to the collective progression of my skill set.
Absolutely fantastic video. Hits home for me!! Thank you!
Hey, I can so identify with your description in begining of this video. It's exactly my experience. I'm only able to do something with a guitar when I'm on my own.
Thanks Brian, good advice. You’re so honest and sincere in all you do. Appreciate it.
Really love your chill attitude and your videos. You got a great voice for commentating. Thanks. ProfBlue
I've always said that BB King could play ONE NOTE and you'd know, "That's BB King."
Great content. Here's another thing that helps me out: lower your standards. That is, practice to a higher level than you actually expect to be able to perform. Kind of like saying shoot for the moon, you will be a lot happier wherever you end up.
Great video here. I was just curious to see what you said, but I guess I figured some of this out once I started playing in public. I was gonna second another post that talks about being comfortable making mistakes, but not stopping! Maybe the crowd picked up, maybe they didn’t, but as long as you don’t stop, it’s never too bad lol. Good pointers, thanks!
Perfect timing Brian. I was starting to believe after all the time and practice I have done, that maybe I'm just not the guitarist that I thought I was. I've been pretty down about it to the point of giving up. Even though I get positive comments about my playing . Truthfully I think They're being nice at times? Anyway you have given me a 2nd wind! I was a member of Active Melody for a few years and learned a lot from you. I'm going to rejoin because your a great teacher and can read minds too! lol Jim
Those were great suggestions. I'm going to put at least some of them into practice. But I have one more: Practice loud. As loud as you think you can get away with. Too often when we're doing our "bedroom" practice or jamming to songs or whatever, we're playing at a low enough volume that our own, shall we say, less-than-stellar playing is politely almost in the background. We can be easy on ourselves. "That didn't sound too bad." Then you show up at a jam or gig and you're loud and up front and distracted by all the stuff going on that you're not used to and maybe you've got a bit of stage fright going on and *_POW!!!_* You forget how to play. Practicing loud will accustom you to the sound pressure level you're going to be dealing with when it's for real.
Thanks for that, Brian! It’s good to know that I’m not the only one feeling like a moron at jams! 😊🤪🎸
The good thing is your actually going to jams 🤩
@@kane6529 you’re right, at least I’m trying ☺️
Not the only one, I’m with you.
This happens to me during my lessons with my tutor. He asks me to demonstrate what I learned last week and even though I practice at home all week I just lose it.
Such a nice supportive subject to tackle. And great advice- thanks!!
Thank you very much for that insight. I always thought it just me because I haven't played live very much over the years but just started in the last few years.
I’ve re-discovered songs I wrote and recorded from years ago. Some impress me as how good they are and others don’t impress me at all. Thing is, we’re musicians and are far more critical of ourselves and the music we listen to. Have mercy.
Had an acoustic gig two weeks back and had to drop my fingerpicking and just strum out. But now I have my own personal psychiatrist, this is so awesome. Your advice, so simple but so effective. Thanks from Devon, UK.
How did you find a good therapist?
I can relate to this - I don't jam with others or play in public at all, but I once had the opportunity to record a solo in a proper recording studio, where my son works as a recording engineer and producer. I chose a solo I already knew and could play well, but it took me over 40 takes to get something I was even remotely happy with, and even then we ended up splicing two takes together for the final video!
Very good video on a very pertinent subject - Thanks! As an additional advice, if I may, I would say that analyzing your playing on the spot is another way to just fall apart because you are being over careful....and then you trip.
Hi Brian. From Spain i'd like to thank you for your channel.For me Is the best i know by far. You touch not only my favourite playing style but also my inner questions like the one you address in this video. Flawless job!! Congrats!!
I'm watching this video just after getting home from band practice, and you nailed it. Today was one of those days, where everything clicked and sounded amazing. But then, at other times, I also feel defeated because I feel I have no idea what I'm doing. I'll try this one-shot exercise.
"go back in an hour and listen to what you recorded, and it is likely to sound better than you thought" - Nope. After listening to myself I b like: "Keep trying, slow way down, do it over and over."
Great topic and advice! I don't think I've seen anyone post a video saying it happens to the best of us!
Thanks Brian, good clip. I'm still just a home studio player, but I know exactly what you mean. Any time I have sat down with another musician, my mind almost goes blank, especially if they start riffing in a genre I don't normally play in. So I think it's important (at least in the beginning) to a) play with someone who's into the same style and b) stick with a few standards in that style.
great great advice...and we're mostly setting a very high bar for our playing and we forget that it's supposed to be fun...thanks Brian
I have been recording myself and I do get little surprises at my playing like you said; I think you have to hear yourself the way others do, because while doing it you can't be fully conscious of what you are doing. THE SAME THING APPLIES TO EVERYTHING YOU DO, THE PERSON WHO IS LOOKING ON, ALWAYS SEES THINGS THAT THE DOER DOES'NT SEE; so when you record yourself ,you become the one who is looking on.
Thanks Brian. These talking sessions are always useful and moreover constructive.
You hit the nail on the head. When it happens to me is I try to slow it down in my mind. But it doesn't always work.
Brian, great subject presentation. Thank you. I can relate. I think keeping the song simple for a performance is a good start. When I am alone working on an original or a cover sometimes I pay to much attention to the details of every part of it's structure. Sometimes this can actually over complicate my ability to perform it smoothly especially in front of people. So, probably its better for me to start out with a simple arrangement and build the details I invision into the composition after creating a foundation that works.
Every Sunday playing lead for a large church. Performance then posted for the world to see. Its overwhelming at times. Practice builds confidence and with some prayer and help from the Holy Spirit doesn't hurt either... :-)
Great topic Brian. I've had that happen when I go to my local guitar shop to pick up one of my guitars that I'd dropped off to have some work done. The guy says to play it some to make sure I'm satisfied with the work he's done. I sit there and nothing comes to mind. I can't play two chords together. lol
Sounds like me.
Not only do I forget what I know, I tend to fumble through what I do know when I play with others. When I was taking private lessons, I could become pretty efficient with an assignment but when I went to play it for my teacher it was sloppy. It’s frustrating to be able to play something but then it doesn’t go well when it’s time to showcase your talent. I once had the same problem with a trumpet solo, rehearsal went very well but I was disappointed in the performance.
Wow.... you said what I would never tell anyone else....most other listeners would say good job,,,,but I say thanks and slink away in a walk of shame knowing I totally blew it, lol. Thanks for the confidence booster, and a good tip to be better.
Good topic to discuss.
We all can relate to this.
Thanks Brian, this is super helpful and encouraging. I have been wrestling with this for 3 years. Your approach is super helpful
great explanation and practice technique to better upstand what is happening.
Great advice Brian!
In most cases, less can be better. Simple phrasing with accuracy is very pleasing to those listening. Mistakes many times are not noticed, at least that I s what my wife says 😉👍
This is me, so thanks for trying to make me feel better Brian, however I'm not sure that I believe that you experience the same. I believe that the only way to overcome this, is to play with others until the self awareness disappears and your natural playing comes through..... this however is easier said than done and I am in awe of you players who have achieved this.
Every dang time. It's stupid frustrating. Thanks for just talking about this!
Hey Brian, that was encouraging!! Although I'm not at the stage of trying out with a band, definitely good advice you put up!! 👍
Thanks Brian. You're a great teacher and your lessons really resonate with me.
That was a good talk Brian about real stuff. Thanks.
Thank you for this video, I thought about just giving up may times because of this scenario, comforting knowing it's not just me.