When to Turn Friendship into Romance
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- Опубликовано: 26 сен 2024
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Is it worth risking a friendship for the possibility of LOVE? Some important things to consider before taking that big step!
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• When to Turn Friendshi...
I would like for my future relationship to start as a friendship first. I hope the universe hears me out. 🙏
Thanks for sharing, Cari Baez🙏❤
I did try moving from friendship to love a couple of times with good female friends and they wanted to remain only friends. It actually deepened all these friendships. There was no harm.
Thank you for sharing!
really? I did that twice and it always fell apart
My guy friend has always said specific things to me over the last twenty years(we’ve known each other since 1969 we met when we were kids) that gives me impression he has feelings for me. We’re both married. Neither one of us is happy. I’m getting my ducks in a row so to speak to get divorced. He believes his wife is getting ready to divorce him. He has that “it’s cheaper to keep her “ mentality he would loose everything .Anyway I refuse to allow our friendship to change into a physical thing as I truly believe he’s more emotionally fragile than me. I know that sounds crazy but I know him well enough that he would become to attached to me as he’s always said we married the wrong people. His emotional health is my main concern right now. I would never want to hurt him. If at some point we’re both single then I would move forward with him if it’s what we both want.
Yep I would stay patient until the dust settles for both of you emotionally and legally, then if you still want to pursue a relationship start exploring it. Right now the friendship you share is important to both of you for this turbulent time!
Shame that you didnt actually answer the question. Yes, you brought up a good point that it is very important to consider the "why", but suppose this is someone who has already thought about that and still decided it was something that they were wanting to do, and were wondering how to go about it, what cues to look for, and how something like that has a tendency to develop? There was no info on that.
Thanks for sharing!
I let my friends at the beginning know from the start that I fall in love with friends. I own it. I love my female friends but they friendzone guys because they know men will usually be physically attracted to them as they get to know them.
I don’t know why I’m this way but I tried the physical romance route and I never seem to fall in love fast but once I learn and get to know their character and their soul.
I stayed friends with a woman that became part of our young group of friends, she dated and had relationships with two of the guys in the group of friends, I had feelings for her but it seems she preferred other type of men, I respect that, I wasn't her type, later in life she separated from the group of friends, got married, formed a family, and we remained friends thru the decades, the brother/sister kind of friendship, lately we talked about it, her marriage ended, and if only we would have made the right choice, we would have been in a relationship and get married, we would have prevented all those heartbreaks and suffering. I agreed, I love her, and she loves me, and we are looking to move forward.
AMAZING love that share!!:)
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its a great time!
My why is because I truly see him as a potential life partner.
wonderful thank you for that feedback!!
A guy friend (26) told me that he had a crush on me (26) 2 years ago but he was in a relationship so we decided just be friends, nothing more. He broke up with his girlfriend 3 months ago and now that we start to hang out more again, I find myself having feelings for him. The sad part is that he's moving out the city soon so I am torn between telling my feelings and just keeping to myself. If I should confess, what would be the right way to express it? I sense that he still cares about me from every little thing he does.
tralalajuhu thank you for this wonderful share! I think there is a lot of beauty and bravery in sharing your feelings with him - all that matters is that you are gentle and open and honest about what you are experiencing regarding him, while at the same time being deliberate about letting him know that you have no agenda or expectations about your relationship moving into a romantic direction (provided that your dominant intention is to maintain the friendship!)
tralalajuhu as long as you don’t bring a lot of pressure and expectation to the conversation it will allow you two to discuss the feelings you have for each other in a safe and stable way, which will allow you to figure out how you BOTH want to move forward with them ❤️🤗
@@Mat_Shaffer Thank you for your heartfelt and considerate advice. I am glad I stopped by at your youtube channel! I think I am gonna let him know what I feel because he did it 2 years ago. If this will lead to something more, great. But if it doesn't, I know I still can continue the friendship I have with him. I am totally going to share your videos to my people!!!
AMAZING I love hearing that!! share away and keep letting me know what you would like to hear more about
@@Mat_Shaffer Hello Mat, I came here again to give you an update after confessing to him. So yesterday I decided to confess to him when I was sending him off to the airport (sigh). I told him that "I think always have a soft spot for you" he replied with "Well, it's not like I can do anything about that" so I took it as a rejection or that he no longer has a feeling for me. When we parted, our faces were so close that we almost kissed but he told me he can't do it.Which is a shame because he wanted to spend his last 5 days with me and in the end he only saw me as a friend. But thank you for giving me the courage to say it, otherwise I'd be beating up myself with regret. Also as much as sad how he doesn't have feelings towards me anymore, I am not upset about it. We're living separate ways in the end. I was just naively thinking if he still had the same feelings, I'd gladly do an LDR with him. Oh well
Thank you so much, Mat .. !! Incredibly informative & yes, I think situations like this should be handled carefully, great help... Btw, I'm a listener/viewer from Denmark. So, your words are spreading ... !! ... 😄👍❤️
Kim Marie Herborg so glad it resonated with you, thank you for suggesting it! Would
Love for you to share with your network on Facebook :):):) any other questions/suggestions you would like me to speak into?
@@Mat_Shaffer I'll share, definitely ... !! 😄
Kim Marie Herborg appreciate that!
Ive met a truly wonderful man who makes me feel aluve again, im 70 yrs young and hes 58. I feel so attracted to him its so hard, but we"re best friends and i think thats how it will always be. I struggle and i told hin but it makes no difference he seems to like spending time with me hes told me he doesnt want marriage, (neither do i but a cuddle would be sooo good lol) what you said is really true, what cost would it be to go further, i would hate to lose his friendship, so i guess that answers my concerns ❤
I’m so happy for you my dear!
Great video very imformative helpful tips.
wonderful glad yu liked it!
i've had it happen a couple times when a friendship deveoloped to love and I've also had happen a friendship that never developed to love those really hurt in the end but it's normal every guy gets rejected in life and every guy can get Girl's if they put enough time and effort into it
It’s 100% possible to heal and create something new🙂
Don't go down that path. You will get burned and it will hurt a lot, much much more than plain 'ole rejection. You have been warned.
AMAZING love that share!!:)
Hello Matt.. I just wanna thank you for this video. I hope you're doing great nowadays. I just really these kinds for a topic. I need to hear from a masculine perspective because I don't have many male friends.. just only 2. thank you!
I appreciate that!
Why, is the most important question!
And if you are WILLING to pay the price, of whatever comes next for this shot you taking? Calculated risks🥰
Thanks so much for your feedback!
Sorry but you didn't answer the question! Some people have thought it through and want to understand subtle ways to approach it....!!
Thanks for sharing!
I’m confused about what exactly the deal is because he hasn’t told me yes or no but we do have a really special,unique bond and connection and we were already physically intimate. My reason though is because I do love him and have something for him I’ve never had for anyone else, and I do see myself being with him Long term
You got this Hon!
Too late. You already gave him the draws before the relationship. Just being honest. He got what he needed from you why bother with a relationship..
My guy, best friend and I, whom I have fallen for, have been friends for nearly 5 years. Lately, however, I have been feeling as though maybe our friendship is one-sided. When we do hang out, I always do the cooking, cleaning, and help with a lot of the major chores. How do I know if the friendship is genuine, or if the only reason he wants the friendship with me is because of the things I do for him?
Sorry to hear that
Thank you!
My why is because I feel like we’re a great match. But he’s going through something mentally right now. Preventing him from growing closer. But he is scared he’ll disappoint both of us, which I’m not that worried about personally. I feel a deep connection but feel a bit stuck
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Your feelings are valid, and I’m here to support you. 💔
But can it end just like any other relationship with a person you met and started hanging out with and break up within a year or so? even if you have known them for 17 years and just started dating for a little while now not long and instead of being platonic friends and start to become boyfriend and girlfriend. Will that relationship last forever? or can they split just like any other relationship?
Thanks for sharing!
I have never had a friendship which we have had sex servive.... It did not matter how long we waited or if it was him or me but the common factor was we met because we were looking for a relationship, or at least I thought they were... Not that we weren't friends at all but it faded... Also I have not been able to turn a romantic connection into a friendship that blossoms into a relationship.... Ugh
it is possible my dear I promise!!
its possible for some poeple, but for others, a friendship doesnt blossom into romance because eitehr lack of mutual atraction, or one person doesnt want risk the friendship, and then that can just keeep on happening with other friends you meet too, like a repeating pattern, or sometimes both those reasons, sometimes friendship leads to more friendship until you have to learn to either uncondiotnally love without expecting those feelings to go, or try to let go of those feelings, (which might not be able to happen)
Can you help me? I mean i love her for like 1.5yrs now but she never wants to leave me and she thinks me just as a friend whom she never wants to leave … but i love her too much too much , i cant watch her beside anyone, do you think we will ever be together??her frnds my frnds just tell me to hang on stay frnds for now and one day you both will get together everyone just says me just hang on and I believe to that let us be friends , but I’m just concerned about the future
It’s 100% possible to heal and create something new
Bro im going through this now. She even sent me a social media request. Would you say 4 weeks is a good timeframe to ask for a date for a friend?
Thanks for your comment! If you're unsure about whether it's the right time to start dating again, try our 'Are You Ready to Date Again?' quiz. It can offer some clarity! 😊 mat-nlcmdzyq.scoreapp.com/
@@Mat_Shaffer thanks sir
@@Mat_Shaffer I did your quiz, this didn't provide any clarity on timelines. But, thanks
You are so welcome!
I personally don't believe in friendship between a heterosexual man and woman. At least one of them has feelings for the other one who has NO clue about it. I had a crush on a friend of mine for SIX long years. When I finally gathered all the courage to tell him, he was just shocked to hear it. Long story short, he didn't share the same feelings. Then a friend of mine told ME he has had feelings for me for the longest time and was hoping for us to be in a relationship. I had NO clue. I was so shocked that I kept my distance from him and our friendship slowly faded away.
Today, I have had this crush on one of my clients for almost a year now. We're both divorced. We have these looong weekly talks (6 to 7 hour long). He tells me what a great woman I am. I am this close to tell him how I feel about him but I am too afraid of both rejection and of losing him as a friend and a confident. So I keep it to myself and it hurts so bad...😢
I’m in the same boat with a female friend of mines. Should I speak up or keep my feelings to myself. If I do say something, there’s no coming back and our friendship will be forever changed , good or bad the outcome.
@@Cuzndr3w I think that you shouldn't tell her UNLESS she sends you hints that she likes you more than a friend. If she keeps saying how great of a friend you are then that's all you are.
Update about the client I had a crush on : some of his behaviors clearly showed that he saw me as just a friend/confident. I am over him now and I am SO glad I didn't tell him how I felt about him !
I wish you well solitaire, I know how painful it is to be in that situation 😢
@@missaysa thanks 🙏🏾
@@Cuzndr3w 🙏💜
No I have Friends just Friends
I like her. Im leaving. Wtf is wrong with me
Don’t give up on love!
❤
😍😍😍
Nowadays, there's so much tips techniques and tricks that it's sometimes hard to relate. But it's not that hard to get your man shivering with ecstasy just by changing the way you talk. As intense as this sounds, maybe try escalating it a step at a time, go’ogle something like everything by Celestine Dessike to sneakily crawl into his mind and let it build on from that.
I appreciate your opinion on this!