How to Decide What to Do With Your Life
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- Опубликовано: 7 сен 2024
- In which we answer the popular question, "What should I do with my life?" Along the way, we bust some dangerous adulthood myths and discuss choosing career paths, joy, dreams, time travel, and the meaning of life and stuff.
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20-SOMETHING MANIFESTO: amzn.to/1LmRK44
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I am still pretty busted up over the fact that I couldn't monetize my childhood dream of becoming a shark.
No, no, no!!!
Here:
1.Go to ocean
2. wear shark fin
3. learn shark jumping tricks
4. charge onlookers
5. Don't quit your day job
Mine was to become a SPD power ranger but your one is way more hilarious🤣
Well, this was a timely video... I mean, it helped calm my nerves for six and a half minutes, but I'm going to resume freaking out about not knowing what to do with my life now.
But really, great video guys :)
Also, your college major doesn't define you. I spent a good deal of college (and high school come to think of it) defining myself by what I studied, like your college major was a window into your soul or something. I distracted me from the very real question of "So, what are you going to do with that once you graduate?"
Take a good long look at your strengths (and no I don't mean that Strengths Finder test however much I enjoyed taking it). I mean your real strengths. Make a list of the things you're good at. That's where I like to start. They can be things that logically lead into a career, or not, just write down a lot of them. Sooner or later you'll notice a pattern.
Find that one friend. You know the one I mean, the one who knows you incredibly well and is brutally honest with you. It might annoy you otherwise, but this is the question your friendship with them was made for. Have a nice long talk with them about it.
"That, my friends, means you're an adult." That would be a great catchphrase.
“you won’t do one thing with your life. you’ll do many things with your life.” that made me feel so much better. i’m 22 and ive got no clue what i wanna do and i’m scared to do anything because i’m not sure if i’ll wanna do it forever. it’s nice to remember i’ll do more than just one thing.
Thank you so much for busting myth #2. I think millennials especially have this idea that our money must come from something super creative and passionate that we LOVE. In reality, that's super rare. Sometimes there are jobs you are good at but not passionate about, and that's perfectly okay as long as you know how to work those other values into the rest of your life. It doesn't ALL have to focus on the career.
I so needed this. I've always been known as the focused person who knew what she wanted and lately that did a complete 180 when I realized I don't enjoy what I do anymore. Now I need to get my but into gear fast so I don't stay undecided forever!
I genuinely believe that if there's something you're really meant to do, you'll get there eventually, and the twists and turns in the journey enrich your life as well as contributing to the end destination. E.g. When I was little, I wanted to be Alexander Fleming when I grew up, which gradually worked its way into the more plausible goal "biological or biochemical research". However, my dad, though lovely, doesn't believe that women should have jobs outside the home or, at the most, the caring professions, so I let him convince me to become a nurse instead. Whilst doing my nursing training, I met some of my favourite people, moved to a city I really love, and grew hugely as a person. For example I'm extremely socially awkward, and my training taught me lots about how to interpret and react to social cues that I probably would never have picked up unless I was being formally taught it.
I'm still working as a nurse at the moment--it's paying for my PhD, which is the first step towards a career in healthcare research. I love my PhD, but I'm also a good nurse. Those skills will serve me well throughout the rest of my life--for example, I've developed skills in managing staff and dealing with complex, difficult situations that would have taken me years otherwise--both inside and outside my career. Nursing would never have been my first choice, but I got here and now I'm glad.
I also totally agree about your career not having to be your passion--I have a book blog under a pseudonym, because I am passionate about books and reading. That provides no income, but I can still pursue it for pleasure, and it does give me a lot of joy.
(This doesn't mean people should necessarily let their parents force them into jobs based on outdated beliefs about gender, it just means that there's always something else round the corner that you can't see coming).
Hannah Lou I really enjoyed reading your story, and I think its great advice. I think it's also a great way of pointing out that career decisions you make when younger are not foolish, even if you change your mind later on. Best of luck with your PhD!
Thanks :-)
great advice yet again, I feel I may need it again soon... (I have set my hopes on an academic career, but it's very very competitive, and I may need a back up plan)
Last year Hank Green did a talk at XOXO festival in which he gave some great advice. He basically said you don't owe your past self anything, you don't need to fulfill the dreams you once had. At the time, I had started my masters degree in communication, and it had nothing to do with my degree in Chinese. I felt almost obligated to keep up my Chinese because "it would be a shame" to lose it (everyone else was telling me this too), even though I knew the chance I would find a job that allowed me to use my Chinese and at the same time not make me completely miserable was very very slim. It really took the pressure off when I realized what I was trying to do was just unnecessary. I still practice my Chinese sometimes, but I now really do it for myself :)
I'm a senior, time is running out, have to decide on a major, don't know what I'm good at, facing an identity crisis, completely and utterly undecided! Anyone else been there? How did you end up choosing a major?
As an anxiety ridden senior in college, this helped me feel better about making decisions about my future. Thanks guys!
I have two college degrees ... and after a year out of graduating and not quite halfway through grad school, I've decided there isn't just one thing I want to do. There are a lot of smaller things I want to accomplish that require the skills and knowledge I've gained in school and through volunteering, internships, etc. Just do what you really enjoy, and some of the stuff you don't love so much, and it will always pay off eventually. Though probably not in the way you expect it to. :)
I cried while watching this video.
I just turned twenty, am working at a job I never thought I could do, and am living at home again because traditional college didn't agree with me. I have been beating my mental self to "decide what I'm doing for the rest of my life" and whether or not I will be able to pursue my passions or if I have to continue in the field that my parents and others around me think I should.
Thank you for reminding me that there are so many roads ahead of me and so much time to traverse them. Much love!
Wonderful video! I have a request for a future video, if I may. Could you do one on voting? Tell us where we should go, what do we do when we get there, what we need to have on us, what kind of things we'll be voting on, how should we prepare, and stuff like that. It would also help if you could give us some tips on how to decide what to vote on. For instance, what should we keep in mind while looking at presidential candidates?
Brittany Burrow YES PLEASE
Brittany Burrow I second this idea! It was really scary the first time, and I was totally confused.
+Brittany Burrow YES. And also how to do the awkward voting thing when you're a student in a state different from the one where you live...
no joke I have been struggling the past week with inner conflict of my purpose in life. And I really think that me stumbling on this video was planned. I thought I wanted to be an Accountant/Auditor (I know it sounds boring) but now I am considering majoring in some business field and minoring in a missions or religious field and going to third world countries to help people. I have decided recently not to choose a career path based on what makes the most money, but to choose one that I can help other people and be happy everyday. Thank you for making this video! It is helping me with my thought process
So, 4 years later - what did you decide?
I think another really important consideration you should take into account is what things are feasible as self-taught hobbies and what things need to be done in a more formal environment. For an example, in high school I was torn between pursuing a music degree or an engineering/science degree. I finally came to the conclusion that music is something I can continue as a hobby, but science is something that requires a bit more formal dedication. Now, it could be the other way around- I could be in a symphony and read books about physics and evolutionary biology in my spare time- but that kind of thinking can help you to determine which path makes the most sense to you.
Future Video Request: How to Stay Informed (basically, what are some good sources to stay informed on global and national politics that are relatively unbiased, and actually put out meaningful content, not articles like "How to Get Kylie Jenner's Killer Lips!").
I'm fifteen and I was doing an art assignment with my friend yesterday and we were both commenting on the fact that we don't know what we want to do nor how to decide. This timing could not have been more perfect. Thank you!
I am becoming increasingly more ok with the Chronocopter™ use on this channel.
I don't know if it's because it's growing on me, or someone's doing time shenanigans.
+Ado Spike I don't know, it seems a little tachyon this channel.
My first published poem.
One
He stood at the foot of her grave.
Motionless, consumed in thought.
Only one single tear crawled
From the depths of his sadness,
But the impact as it fell from his face
Shook his world to pieces.
I am in my late 20s and literally, at a breaking point in my career. I have a full time job which makes me miserable all day. I really want to break out, but I am always confused and scared about what to pursue next. This video really gave me a boost. (Adult, not a failure!) Great video guys. I do hope I can come to a decision soon!
+Pinky Borah Mid twenties and in the same boat. Good luck to you!
I think it's always good to realize it is never too late to change your mind. Lots of good meaning friends made it seem to me like I had to choose a major as a freshman, get that degree in 4 years, and never look back. But the truth is, the plenty of people change majors and career paths all the time. You can even transfer colleges if you find out the program you're interested in isn't offered at your current one(or isn't that great). That's what I did.
And it is possible to go back to school. Some might say it's impossible when you get married or have kids, but there are people defying that statement as I type this.
Sorry, I am very passionate about this. It is never too late to change your mind. You're never too old to learn something new. There are so many experiences out there for you. You are never stuck.
How I wish this video had been around five years ago. All anyone has ever told me about this before is some variation on "Do what you would do if money were no object".
To which I always say "Reading about cool s**t all day in an office full of puppies is not a viable career path."
I think my biggest learning (as a freshly minted adult) is that setting too-broad of timelines for my life is a really, really bad idea, i.e. "I need to decide what I'll be doing ten years from now RIGHT THIS MOMENT!!!!!". I'm trying to focus more on what I enjoy doing right now and setting regular check-in-and-see-if-this-still-feels-right points.
Also, job shadowing is awesome because you learn about jobs you might never have even thought of. I want to go to med school and through shadowing doctors (which I loved) I learned a lot about other really awesome jobs like medical social work. Made me realize that there's not just one career than I could excel at.
Thank you for making this video; I really needed this today.
Keep up the great work!
+Stuart Mackintosh this
I work in IT and do my art on the side... I'm a pretty happy cookie. Art was really my major focus in high school, but IT gives me that critical thinking outlet and a stable schedule/paycheck for me to go gallivanting out to waterfalls or mountains in my spare time and do some fun photography/painting stuffs :)
I grew up my whole life thinking I was going to be a primary care pediatrician, but in my third year of college I took an MCAT prep course and got so burned out I realized it was just not for me. I then thought to become an NP (and even got accepted to grad school, yay!) but then couldn't start when I wanted to because money. During that time I then realized that I didn't need a masters to do what I wanted, So I'm saving up and am hoping to go back to school to become an RN. It's been a crazy trip and now it's just a matter of actually DOING the thing.
i only wish there were more comments. I'm really enjoying hearing everyones stories. the only thing that could be more calming than actually figuring out my future path is knowing that everyone else is or has been there to :)
That was honestly really good advice! It's important to think about all aspects of life that you value and look for an overlap when it comes to a job/career/whatever you're going to do with your life. Even if you wanted to be a stay at home mom or a volunteer firefighter which aren't typical "careers" it can be rewarding and exactly what you want to do with yourself. It all depends on your individual wants and needs.
I decided what I wanted to do through a mix of passion, pressure, and realism. When I was little I wanted to be an aerospace engineer because my dad kinda planted it in my head and I thought it was cool. Then as I got older I wanted to be in business. I took an accounting class in highschool and loved it. So I started college with an accounting degree. Over time I lost interest and found that economics and finance were much more interesting to me. Now I'm getting a finance degree with a minor in economics. But that isn't even where my plan ends! My dream is to have my own restaurant and to run the finances of it. And who knows if that will even come to be in the next 5-10 years. Plans change. Just gotta go with the flow and check in with yourself sometimes.
The catchphrase oughta be Wrap It In a Blanket and Smack It On The Bottom. ;)
True. I went from psychology to engineering to english education majors in college. I'm actually only a freshman and it'll probably change another 7 times.
I'm literally crying because I needed this so much and have been struggling with this for so long. While this doesn't solve all my issues thank you so very much!
i really needed this right now! I feel a bit like I've cheated, because I've just finished an art-based degree, and yet I feel totally happy and at peace taking on a semi-management role at my retail job. I feel bad for not feeling bad that I'm not getting any art jobs right away, but honestly I think I'd be happy just....working and making art on my days off.
But I don't think I'd ever tell my parents that.
If you're completely stuck, I would suggest interest/career inventories. Even better if you have a career counselor at school that can provide you with them and help you interpret them (and where to go from there).
Also, a professor once asked me: if you had 1 million to spare, to what organization would you give it to? While it seems very unrelated to a career, it actually helped me realize what was important to me. I always knew whatever job I chose had to help me get a good sense of purpose in my life.
Thank you guys so much for making this video. I'm graduating college in a few months, and I have been freaking out about what to do afterwards. It helps to know that I won't necessarily be stuck in whatever field I find a job in post-graduation. :)
Yeah, you guys got it. I went to college and learned how to build theatrical set pieces; a fantastic job market! (Sarcasm is abundant in that last statement..) A year and three months later, I'm a part time employee at a designer shoe store. While I don't see myself selling shoes as a carreer for the rest of my life, I have strong opinions on what I think is fun (e.g. building props, reading, and plenty of other silly stuff). Hopefully with that, I can find a new carreer path when the time is right.
This is really good advice. When I was young I wanted to be a comic book artist but I didn't have the money to go to art school so I "gave up" and got into baking and kitchen work but I kept drawing and then once I was more stable and experienced I started chasing down illustration gigs and now I'm doing comics full time. It was a long winding path to get there but I found my way to my dream job and I learned a lot of other things along the way by would other jobs to pay the rent.
And then there are people like Ninja Brian of the comedy band Ninja Sex Party who just quit his job as a physics professor (!!) to work full time on a band that makes songs comprised mostly of sexual puns and funny videos to go with them. That is the biggest case of "you never know where life will take you" I can think of.
2:45
Haha I think "wrap it in a blanket and slap it on the bottom" might be becoming a sort of catchphrase. Great video! It's very good to be doing things that relate to the field you want to go into for fun, so you get good experience.
the timing for this video couldnt be better. with my junior year of college about to start in a few days, the thought has been in the back of mind giving me a lot of anxiety. now i've finally calmed down a bit.
i also really like John's video "What To Do With Your Life" that he posted about two years ago on vlogbrothers I find myself going back to it every time I'm starting to panic.
I recently had an existential crisis with what to do with my future. I have been attending my college for three years now majoring in biomedical sciences preparing for med school because I decided I wanted to be a doctor when I was in ninth grade. But I have been struggling in school, and I know that med school is going to be near impossible and I've been doubting myself and wondering if I'm even cut out for it. And also, very recently, I realized that I want to fly planes. I'm very passionate about it. I've only wanted one other thing this badly in my life. I've researched it extensively. Whether it's commercially, privately, or just as a personal hobby. But I'd really like to make a career out of it somehow. But I'm very scared to tell my parents and I also fear that I've gone down my current path too far now and that it's too late to stop or turn back. I'm lost.
This video was super helpful! I basically went through most of these steps recently, but I think I will revisit. Thanks for making this!
Super helpful; even though I'm in grad school, there are times where I'm not sure if I've made the right choice. This helped calm some of that anxiety. Thanks!!
It's difficult to know if a job is going to be in line with your personal values and is a subject difficult to research, short of just going out and trying the job. I think part of the problem is that some values are discouraged and thought of as being lazy by society as we live in a world where a high value is placed on work, work, work. So, going into a job interview, from what I have been taught anyway, you're not supposed to ask about pay or time off. It's really hard to find work one might enjoy, so often the solution to just to work at different jobs just to keep life from getting stale. That's something else that's been discouraged-going from job to job. But who wants to do the same thing day after day, all their lives anyway? It's odd how it's also encouraged that you make efforts to grow yourself, but somehow you're supposed to manage this within a single job?
My problem is that I love everything! Right now, im studying mechanical engineering, but i love things like biology, computer science and creative stuff (like drawing and sculpting). It's hard choosing between them or finding something that touches everything.
imarockstarification Sounds like you might enjoy creating prosthetic limbs...
THANK YOU!!!!!!
Emma, Emma, Emma!! It is so cool to FINALLY see another SNAP IMPAIRED individual. If I had a nickel for every time I've faced ridicule because of it (mostly because one of my passions in life is music) my bank balance would be far larger. I am also in full support of the PT Program that will not accept applicants until they've volunteered time in the field. I worked most of my life in health care and the number of people who were in it and shouldn't be is astronomical. Truly seeing what the job entails is vital to choosing a career. Far too many THINK they know what the reality will be. Experiencing it before choosing several years of study would be invaluable.
That was awesome, guys! And in good time too. Some friends were freaking out about this just yesterday because it's our last semester in university and we don't know what to do. I linked them here, hopefully they'll feel better. hahaha
Thanks for a great video and I hope you have a nice weekend :D
I'm a surgeon in the streets but a mime in the sheets.
Great advice - I have had to go through this process recently, and you have provided some useful reflection points.
This was well needed as I just got my GCSE results! Thank you!
Best how to adult video by far! Hit home!
Hah, that's what I call good timing; I'm literally sitting down writing a list of pros and cons of different potential (life) options at the moment, wondering *what to do with my life* :D
..and now I'm going to actually watch the video x)
I volunteer to guest host an episode of How To Adult: Snapping. This is an imperative life skill Emma!
This video is so well-timed. Thank you!
that helicopter always cracks me up
Thank you for this. You really cleared the doubts I had on the only-one-pathway ideology.
Awesome! I need to send this to my little brother...
This was pretty much my process for deciding I want to teach computer science.
I love that @ 1:41 one of the roads hs a dead end sign... :D
Thank you! Lots of good tips, inspiration and hope presented in this video. Take care!
This video literally came at the perfect time for me. I got my degree and realized I don't want to do psychology at all so I've been trying to decide what I want. Aaaand it's a lot of the stuff my fiance was telling me so I guess I've learned I'm a bad listener too.
Thanks for making this video, it came at the perfect time for me! I'm currently going through this exact life crisis of what to do and which path to take, and there were some really helpful tips in here
It is so interesting to read other people's stories, we can all be uncertain yet hopeful together ;)
I'm currently studying environmental science and completely love it - and will probably end up going into consultancy because I think I'd enjoy it. But I almost chose to study psychology! People fascinate me and I love helping others to think in new ways which they might not have done. Now I'm thinking I could be a life coach too.
Also a #lifegoal / #dream of mine would be to do a Ted talk, an amazing platform where I would be able to show my message to the world.
But hey if I end up being a cattle farmer in Ireland and absolutely love it then hey, go future me. Do you boo.
Thanks for this video! I needed to hear these things.
A really good video! Thanks! :) Makes me think and feel alot clearer with my life!
Well I changed what I wanted to do with my life. I thought I wanted to be a translator and now I'm working in social work, and working with kids which I never thought I would
These are really great videos.. Thank you for making them
I'm going to 10th grade and I have to decide which uni I want to go so I know which subjects should i take up. Till now i had no idea how to decide what i want to do with my life. I want to thank you for the great tips, it helped so I kinda have something in my mind what i want to do with my life. :)
Great video guys. And Emma's hair is wonderfully curly! :P
So, the average person changes careers like 7 times... i dont know if this could make an episode or maybe just a short blog post or part of a Q&A, but how do you emotionally navigate THAT? sometimes it happens by chance or by lateral promotiona, but sometimes you have to look at the thing youve spent months or years preparing to do and decide, "hey.. this isn't working out. I need to do something else." How do you recognize when you're at that point and take that step?
One thing that i would say is don't get bogged down with negatives like I Can't they could color your perspective and make thing seem like they won't work out when they probably will.
At 43 I still have no idea what I "want to do with my life." And I don't think I ever will. Nor should I.
I've found it best to instead think about what you want to do with the next five to ten years. Then work towards doing that. Beyond ten years you are going to be a different person than you are now and will probably want to be doing something else anyway. So don't spend all your time now making sure that your future self is going to be locked into dong something he or she no longer wants to do.
4:25, Yeah, that's not the best way to enter the water, though. Enter the water quickly and get used to it. It's much faster and you'll have to experience the uncomfortably cold water for a lesser amount of time. However, don't do that with careers.
thank god this account exists...
This is just what I need. Thanks!
OMG I LOVE YOU GUYS I hope you guys are doing great
this is so helpful! thank you guys so much :)
I would love to be a tattoo artist, and a teacher, but knowing it doesn't pay much and I plan on living in a rather expensive area, so im going to be trying to become an RN and then working on my crafts passions later. I'll probably be a tattoo artist part time and maybe just teach classes for recreational things (bc I have a menagerie of weird skills like welding to sewing to knitting to fighting with medieval weapons) and thats ok bc ill still be happy.
Did anyone else see the "This episode was brought to you in part by viewers like you" screen from Arthur (the PBS show) as he said that? 0.o
thank you very much i feel better now, i mean it
thank you, guys !
This video is a video I have needed for 3 years lol. But, I am still scared :( being in college sort of forces you to commit to a certain area of study by being expensive and taking years. I don't know if I want to stay in college if I'm not sure what I want to do, but leaving college feels like its less of a solution and more of just... running away.
That Mickey Mouse in the background made me happy. Thanks for this video!
nice video. thanks so much for the tips.
There are people in the world that are not very hard workers and getting a job takes along time .
Emma, how do you get involved in bio-medical research? It sounds like an awesome career.
This is totally unrelated, but Emma, your curly hair is beautiful
This is exactly what i needed
Maybe "wrap it up in a blanket and smack it on the bottom" could be the closing catchphrase? XD
I hereby declare this video to be useful, b/c I've been feeling like a lazy bum of a failure for STILL not having a full-time job two years after graduation. (why hello there, masters degree required for all useful jobs in my desired field when I have no money to pay the undergraduate loans!)
What is your advice for when you've gone through the process to find a career you love but are finding it hard to break into that career because no one is hiring in said career? I'm torn between following what I'm passionate about and trying to figure out when to look for a different career so I can make money and feel like an adult (and not live with my parents).
I would seek out a volunteer opportunity or internship in a closely related field. Your dream field may not be hiring for paid staff but may be willing to take on an apprentice. This is a win-win because you will learn more about the job responsibilities and get a head start when a paid position opens due to your experience and new networking connections. It also doesn't hurt to still send in a resume. You never know if they really are hiring (or will be soon) but not advertising.
+Ja'Neil Jackson now what advice would you give if said person cannot afford to be volunteering so they have another job which leaves them little time...but they really want to get into a field that it seems no one is hiring for? generally speaking.
+Μέλ Μέλ. If reducing your paid hours is not a possibility, there are many virtual internships, depending on the field, that you can complete in your spare time, from anywhere. There are also volunteer opportunities that require as little as four hours a week. The key is to plan ahead. Where there is a will, there is a way (when you want it bad enough).
MsLazyllama101 This is something I'm struggling with right now (museum studies grad, woot woot). I know I want to do this forever (or as far forward as I can see), but I've been in temporary positions for three years (with several years of internships before that), and I know that if I want a full-time permanent position I am going to have to move somewhere "random" (i.e. no family/connections/real desire to live there). There are some jobs, just not in my ideal locations. This isn't necessarily a problem (I like my career enough to live most anywhere), but I have a partner to think about (who has a job where we currently live) and family members I want to be close to (including aging relatives I want quality time with). So I'm struggling with whether to take something non-career-related in my current area to maintain stability (and because I love living here), or to drag my partner with me to a new faraway place so I can stay with my career (which I'm really passionate about and makes me really happy).
Obviously I have no answer to your question...just wanted you to know I feel similarly. I wish you tons and tons of luck!
great video, it's an excellent summary of what one should do before committing to a career (o two, or three).
One thing that I recommend that was shown to me when I started the process of figuring out what to do with my life is Chapter 38 of Steve Chandler's book "Wealth Warrior". You can google it or search for it on youtube, cause Michelle Akin once read the whole thing on a video. It'll help, believe me.
make an impact
I inadvertently made a short video series about myth #2 on my other channel (StuffWeDig ). Also when are we getting a "How to Snap" episode for elmify ? Can you tell that I just learned how to tag?
I kinda wanna do what Phillip DeFranco does mixed with social activism
4:33 Hunter College! haha!
My first thing published was also a haiku, Mike. *high-fives*
"And remember, the future isn't written yet..."
I thought FOR SURE you were going to say "and neither is the catch phrase."
What a missed opportunity!
Is that a Rhett and Link shirt?
i have yet to decide what i want to do with my life so peeps keep asking me what do i like to do. and i generally tell them nothing, but that isnt true. i just dont like doing anything which is helpful in deciding a career.
i like learning, debating and strategy. but i would hate to be a scholar, or a teacher, and i failed college cause i hated learning that way. as for debating well... proper organized debates are meh to me. and i am not all that good at strategy, although not sure that is the best word to describe what i like doing, just the best one i could think of.
so... easiest to just go with i dont like doing anything, because for all practical purposes that is true.
+Firaro Sounds like you'd make a good lawyer
So what did you decide to do? I need help and I'm in the same situation(at first when I saw your comment I was trying to remember when I wrote it).