How a Gay Man Became a Conversion Therapist
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- Опубликовано: 10 фев 2025
- Shortly after getting saved as a gay youth, John Smid buried his sexuality and joined the leadership team in a conversion therapy program at Love in Action. After years leading the program, he finally comes to terms with the fact that no one was finding any success changing their sexuality, and starts asking big questions about what they're doing in the program.
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I’m just starting to deal with my anger from being lied to by the overzealousness of being told I can change and being judged by them and being judged by myself. I learned to hate myself and to not trust what I knew about myself. I’ve been in therapy for 30 years and still struggle with this message. The conservative literalist Christians and the vileness of their scripture bashing mindset have ripped my heart apart. Somehow I still see Christ through it all. I cannot stand the evangelical movement. I still hurt so bad. I’m now fully out. Thanks for sharing your story. I need someone to talk to who understands. I love your podcasts.
🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉YAY!! YOUR BACK!!
GREAT START TO THE 2ND SEASON!! WOOT WOOT😊
Im so glad that you guys are back.
The depth of John's experience really gives weight to his testimony that being gay is NOT something that can be or needs to be changed. I also really appreciate his forthright criticism of the attitude that we shouldn't be trusting our own hearts! Obviously we need to develop and heal and mature, but our essence is something worth expressing through the way we live our uniquenesses 💎
So excited to have you guys back! What a GREAT episode. My partner, who was involved in an ex gay ministry for over a decade, draws the conclusions as your guest did. It's nice to hear there are other people that made the best out of being in something so harmful.
That quote from his daughter at the end - powerful. Great interview.
This is an interesting story. John has been through a lot. Thanks for sharing your story.
This is such a powerful episode. So many people should listen to this!
I really appreciate his vulnerability, but at the same time, I don’t think this interview addresses just how devastating people’s experience with John’s “ministries” was and is.
exactly... it stops at "they didn't come back". knowing the depths of despair under evangelical psychological torture, i can only hope they were able to recover
Thank you for sharing. Wish this man showed a lot more remorse and refrained from defending the conversion therapy organizations. The way he talks makes me feel sick to my stomach.
I’m glad you’re back. I was your age yesterday and now I’m 67.
Wow, this is brave stuff yo
I never really ever want to go back to a charismatic church, again.😢
A " charismatic " church sounds almost like any cult I have ever heard of, they sure take advantage of people who are in a vulnerable place
@@willistaylor4077 me neither. Nor to an evangelical church.
@@massagewerks1734 Yep.
Powerful story
Wow. John was a key exodus player. I’ve read his book.
Mmm I think the daughters' message of "I hope you stop hurting people" was too harsh. He was the victim and that's why he spread the message he did.
Please have Greg Johnson on from St. Louis. He is a celebrate gay pastor in an evangelical community. He has a new book out this summer called there is still time to care. It is an amazing story.
I've seen several of your episodes with a certain morbid fascination. I really don't get that religion thing. For me it's something like heterosexuality - I grew up with both being the strongly encouraged norm but I never understood the fascination of others with it. Could it be religion has a genetic component just like sexual orientation?
Yet I know plenty of people who have been helped by this sort of therapy and now live satisfying straight lives, or contented celibate ones.
You seem to only show one side of the story. You seem to want to make people believe that this sort of therapy can only be a torturous experience, or at least a greatly disappointing one, when I know personally people who have been able to attain considerable change, and resolve much of their traumas and gender identity issues.
How are you ever going to change anyone's mind if the only people you ever converse with are people who already agree with you in every respect?
Being celibate does not change your sexual orientation. You just stopped being sexually active, gay or straight. There is no such thing as gay to straight reorientation.
There isn't another side. Like the other commenter said. Just bc they are celibate doesn't mean they don't experience those same sex feelings. And the other people who are living "satisfying straight lives" well I got news for ya. They are either bisexual or very unhappy gay people. Just bc they say it works does not mean it did.
Stop lying dude, you’ll never change your mind no matter what anyone does or says