Hi Kev... I really appreciate your perspective bcuz I spend a lot of time developing myself from Spirituality to motherhood & education etc but not a lot of time defining what I want from relationships or friendships for that matter... watching Ur videos is like taking a refresher course in self love...thanks for sharing 😏 Many Blessings
that's nice with that being said you don't have to wait for him to come after you and chase you either you can keep on moving to be with next man just even be better than the one you thought about chasing or waiting for
I chased a guy for the first time and learned real quick. You feel so stupid and used by the end of it. Just pour that energy and love into people that deserve it. Such as your friends, family, yourself, or maybe even a homeless person. I didn’t need him anyway. I’m one semester away from receiving my bachelors in engineering. 🙌🏽💁🏽♀️
Yup, being through the same thing this year but you know what? It doesn't matter because you're the best. You go girl, I don't know you but I'm proud of you! Congrats on your bachelor diploma and keep slaying!
Sorry y’all I had finals. But thank you all for your support!!! I truly feel like I have an army of strong and self aware women supporting me. 🤗 Side note: he either never came back or I just wouldn’t know. I cut off all contact with him and ended up moving a few months after. No need to dwell on something that was toxic
I haven’t attracted anyone since I stopped entertaining bullshit from men, but that’s better than being abused. It’s far better to be alone than to wish you were alone.
When you know your worth, you don’t take rejection personally. Sometimes rejection is God’s protection. Keep it moving. You have plenty of options. You just need to get out of the house so you can meet them. Walk in your feminine energy, Queens!!
Rejection makes you forget how much of a blessing you can be to someone. You only see what YOU lost, and neglect to realize what they lost. And when you tip the scale, the only person losing, is them.
It's interesting, I'm 22 and it seems like a lot of guys my age want to be chased rather than chase. There's been a role reversal and as the generations go by, the more passive guys get about chasing women. That's because all you need these days is to slide in dms, no up front approaches. There's a big disparity between older generations and the generation of men today
I've dated men 30-50 years of age some behave no different than men in their 20s. Unfortunately technology & fathers(not all) not raising their sons to become men caused a huge issue in dating/relationships.
Unrequited love isn’t love. Chasing someone isn’t smart or necessary. Love yourself enough to believe that if someone doesn’t value you the way you deserve, it is best to move forward. No hard feelings.
Greetings! You're correct! Also, Chasing....the male isn't even seen amongst the females and males of the animal Kingdom. Consider the Eagle when chosing your mate. Chose wisely BW (Daughters of Zion). Also, make sure he's a brother that has "Submitted & Obey" The Commandments of his Heavenly Father. He shouldn't be asking you to "Submit or Obey" his Rules & Regulations when he is disobeying the 10 Commandments of his Heavenly Father. When a female eagle meets a male and they want to mate, she flies down to earth with the male pursuing her and she picks a twig. ... The female eagle grabs the twig and flies to a much higher altitude pursued by the male until she perceives it high enough, and then drops the twig for the male to chase. The female eagle has a unique way of choosing her mate. Both men and women can learn from the process the female eagle put the male eagle through to see if he is qualified to mate her. One of the key lessons you will discover ladies, is that an eagle NEVER SETTLE-NO MATTER WHAT. One of the essential teachings a man can learn from this story is that a man must be prepared to pursue what he wants, and be willing to prove he is worthy and qualify for the pursuit. When it comes time for the female eagle to choose her mate, she prepares herself for many suitors. She does not settle for the first male eagle who tries to get her attention. She does not settle because every other female eagle she knows has a mate. She practices self-control and wait while going through the process. Many male eagles will try to impress her. She will take her time and evaluate them over a period of time, make her decision based on her instincts and chooses a male Eagle to fly with for a while. This is equivalent to dating, just because someone takes you out on a date does not mean he or she is the right one for you. The reason for dating is to see if this person is the right fit for you. The female eagle does not allow herself to become emotionally connected to the male eagle, but rather stick with her plan without any distractions. Her focus is to make sure he fits the profile she has in mind. She does not have the time to be fooling around with male eagles that has no character and values. The male eagle she chooses will be her mate for the rest of her life. She will not mate with another male eagle unless her mate dies. It is important to her not to rush the process. If you learn to take your emotion out of the initial dating phase and focus on the knowing phase you will be fine. Relationships are too important and yet complicated to be rushed into because it takes time to get to know someone. Remember to put logic before emotions and allow the spirit of God to lead you. The female eagle will fly with the male eagle for a while and if she likes the way he flies, she will put him through a series of test. When you are dating or being pursued as a love interest and you are pleased and impressed with the way they are treating you, then you can move to what we called the Relationship Appraisal Process (RAP). This is where you ask the critical questions as it pertains to their intention of a relationship with you. This is similar to what the female eagle does. If the female eagle does not see the male eagle as a potential mate, they do not initiate the test but rather move on to the next male eagle trying to find a better fit. Few Key Tests A Male Eagle Must Pass TEST # 1 The female eagle picks up a piece of stick and flies high with it. At some point she will drop the stick to see if the male eagle can catch it. He is not qualified to be with her just by good looks he has to do some work. The male eagle has to show his proficiency in these tests and if he passes the first test she moves to the next. TEST # 2 The female eagle finds a larger stick and flies with it much higher the second time around. Each time the male catches the stick, she continues with the next process. Some of you say yes to a man just because he is Christian. Some of you say yes to a woman because of their anointing or their beauty. A man can be good to you and not necessarily good for you. A woman can be good to you and not good for you. If the man is not in a position to marry he should not be pursuing a serious relationship. TEST #3 Again, the female eagle picks up a larger piece of stick and even flies higher and drops it. If he wants her that bad, he must be willing to prove himself. If the male eagle drops the stick, he is automatically disqualified. There are no second or third chances. TEST #4 She then finds the largest stick that she can carry, and at this point the stick is the size of a small log! She can still fly very high with this large stick. At any time in this process, if the male fails to catch the stick, she flies away from him as her signal that the test is now over and she begins her search all over again. Her character and integrity will not allow her to settle, and she will not compromise her reputation for love. She will not lower her standard to fit the male eagle. Some of you are doing just that in your pursuit of love. ~Shalom~ 🕊 🌞 🤴🏾 🐏🐑🐏🕎🐏🐑🐏 👑 👸🏽 🌕
Like my Grandaddy said he rode the bike hours to see my grandma no shoes on. He held his shoes in his hand because my grandmother father told him he better not come over in dirty shoes. So the moral to the story is if a man want you he will do anything neccessary to be with you. You don't ever have to chase him. I hit that subscribe button many of us need to hear this.
I know this is an old comment but my first love we were teenagers swam across a lake cut down a hornets nest and ran to my house stung and all I because he “couldn’t afford flowers for my birthday” I don’t know how he did it 🤦🏼♀️ but he brought me a hornets nest a soda and a pop tart ( we were young and he was very poor) moral of the story if he wanted to he would !!
Shanell Pittman apparently not if they’re successful. To be successful you would have to invest a lot of time and attention into that and you wouldn’t be able to do that if your worried about chasing somebody
The more you DON'T chase men, the MORE he'll chase you, men like to chase and women liked to be pursued,.. never act NEEDY or CONTROLLING. Don't act B***** just be CONFIDENT and Happy, the KEY to a KEEPER of the man, also keep the some mystery about yourself and open up little by little
I know that’s right! I love that! Make a list of why you’re worth it! Awesome advice to women! I think I do a pretty good job at being the doormat, and that I SERIOUSLY need to work on! Thanks for the video!
So true Florida Girl about opening up lil by lil!!!!!! Don't give them too much about your past and why things didn't work out in other relationships.cause while you're talking he's taking notes on all your weak points!! Then BOOM!!! Wham bam thank you mam he's gone that damn quick and done with us!! I had to learn too!! Staying single for now... I'm gud! Lol
Yep and it'll repel the duds a hell of a lot faster! Even though I haven't gotten serious with anyone yet ALL guys I have dated have properly tried to pursue me, take me out and treated me well
I just don't give a F anymore. Now men don't even know what to do with me. I walk away so smooth, they get stuck between pride and stupidity, lost af. I know my worth. On to the Next. I'm not saving nobody but my damn self.
Hahaha 😂 I’m agree with you - the guy I like doesn’t chase me anymore and he became distant so next time we saw each other I just walk away after spending some time together. But he doesn’t knows my intention and he called me next day and I didn’t answer and I won’t answer to him anymore. He already told me that he doesn’t have time to offer to me a relationship - so there is not reason for me to answer him. Period!
Greetings! You're correct! Also, Chasing....the male isn't even seen amongst the females and males of the animal Kingdom. Consider the Eagle when chosing your mate. Chose wisely BW (Daughters of Zion). Also, make sure he's a brother that has "Submitted & Obey" The Commandments of his Heavenly Father. He shouldn't be asking you to "Submit or Obey" his Rules & Regulations when he is disobeying the 10 Commandments of his Heavenly Father. When a female eagle meets a male and they want to mate, she flies down to earth with the male pursuing her and she picks a twig. ... The female eagle grabs the twig and flies to a much higher altitude pursued by the male until she perceives it high enough, and then drops the twig for the male to chase. The female eagle has a unique way of choosing her mate. Both men and women can learn from the process the female eagle put the male eagle through to see if he is qualified to mate her. One of the key lessons you will discover ladies, is that an eagle NEVER SETTLE-NO MATTER WHAT. One of the essential teachings a man can learn from this story is that a man must be prepared to pursue what he wants, and be willing to prove he is worthy and qualify for the pursuit. When it comes time for the female eagle to choose her mate, she prepares herself for many suitors. She does not settle for the first male eagle who tries to get her attention. She does not settle because every other female eagle she knows has a mate. She practices self-control and wait while going through the process. Many male eagles will try to impress her. She will take her time and evaluate them over a period of time, make her decision based on her instincts and chooses a male Eagle to fly with for a while. This is equivalent to dating, just because someone takes you out on a date does not mean he or she is the right one for you. The reason for dating is to see if this person is the right fit for you. The female eagle does not allow herself to become emotionally connected to the male eagle, but rather stick with her plan without any distractions. Her focus is to make sure he fits the profile she has in mind. She does not have the time to be fooling around with male eagles that has no character and values. The male eagle she chooses will be her mate for the rest of her life. She will not mate with another male eagle unless her mate dies. It is important to her not to rush the process. If you learn to take your emotion out of the initial dating phase and focus on the knowing phase you will be fine. Relationships are too important and yet complicated to be rushed into because it takes time to get to know someone. Remember to put logic before emotions and allow the spirit of God to lead you. The female eagle will fly with the male eagle for a while and if she likes the way he flies, she will put him through a series of test. When you are dating or being pursued as a love interest and you are pleased and impressed with the way they are treating you, then you can move to what we called the Relationship Appraisal Process (RAP). This is where you ask the critical questions as it pertains to their intention of a relationship with you. This is similar to what the female eagle does. If the female eagle does not see the male eagle as a potential mate, they do not initiate the test but rather move on to the next male eagle trying to find a better fit. Few Key Tests A Male Eagle Must Pass TEST # 1 The female eagle picks up a piece of stick and flies high with it. At some point she will drop the stick to see if the male eagle can catch it. He is not qualified to be with her just by good looks he has to do some work. The male eagle has to show his proficiency in these tests and if he passes the first test she moves to the next. TEST # 2 The female eagle finds a larger stick and flies with it much higher the second time around. Each time the male catches the stick, she continues with the next process. Some of you say yes to a man just because he is Christian. Some of you say yes to a woman because of their anointing or their beauty. A man can be good to you and not necessarily good for you. A woman can be good to you and not good for you. If the man is not in a position to marry he should not be pursuing a serious relationship. TEST #3 Again, the female eagle picks up a larger piece of stick and even flies higher and drops it. If he wants her that bad, he must be willing to prove himself. If the male eagle drops the stick, he is automatically disqualified. There are no second or third chances. TEST #4 She then finds the largest stick that she can carry, and at this point the stick is the size of a small log! She can still fly very high with this large stick. At any time in this process, if the male fails to catch the stick, she flies away from him as her signal that the test is now over and she begins her search all over again. Her character and integrity will not allow her to settle, and she will not compromise her reputation for love. She will not lower her standard to fit the male eagle. Some of you are doing just that in your pursuit of love. ~Shalom~ 🕊 🌞 🤴🏾 🐏🐑🐏🕎🐏🐑🐏 👑 👸🏽 🌕
AAAAAH I'm so glad I'm not the only one who sees it that way. Like its so much deciphering and investigative work, shit sounds fucking exhausting and my job already sucks the soul out of me, lol maybe thats why I''ve been on like 2 dates this entire year.
@bigjayking24 does it mean that you know too much about relationship dear 😂😂😂men like this men hate that all the time!! Am done with the fucking shit so called men to hell
It's so much better being ALONE and SINGLE...then WAITING for his Texts...his calls...his ATTENTION that is long gone and never coming Back. Your FREE! Find someone who will appreciate you! ❤️
A one sided relationship is my worst nightmare. You know deep in your heart that he can take you or leave you and so does anyone around you two. I deserve mutuality and reciprocation.
You can’t have any relationship without reciprocity. So take him or leave him as well. I’d been there with a guy recently who came on strong like urine in the beginning then slowed down because he felt ‘I wasn’t chasing back’. Then his attitude turned into take it or leave it. Well, being the queen of dumpville, that was no hard call for me. I think the problem with a lot of us women today is because we like the guy, we don’t want to hurt him.’ Hurt him. Cause him real pain because he won’t be afraid to do the same to you. Pull the trigger and mirror them. If he can take it or leave. You can too
@@MegaLadylove2012 its easy when they its obvious theyre not interested, cuz usually they stop calling or asking you out as much, so you dont even have to do anything, lol. but whats frustrating is when they keep contacting you and making it seem like they care, then after a while you realize its all shallow and theyre not even interested in you, just in keeping you around and keeping themselves entertained. that's what really pisses me off, wasting youre time on a needy ass chump.
This video made me cry. I noticed I'm always the one chasing men and what they usually do two of three things he mentioned in the video. Either the reject me or not put in half the effort I do when it comes to a realationship. I'm still learning to love myself and see my value. It's a uphill battle but I will get there
@@dani2959 girl it happens. But I honestly believes it comes down to your self worth and love you have for yourself. Its so important to ask if you truly loved yourself would you be chasing after someone? the men should be chasing after us
Yohonna Brewer keep going Yohanna, and don’t stop until you get there. I’m rooting for you❣️@Robin D, I absolutely love what you wrote to Yohonna. Godspeed Queen ❤️
I walk with an "aw hell no" if a man is mistreating, disrespecting, demeaning, belittling, or treating me with any sort of low value...it's nice hearing this coming from a man
Ladies believe me when I tell you this! By experience when I stand my ground and distance myself after disliking guy's behavior 99.9% of the time they contact me and I have the upper hand! *Great Video Kev! 👌
@@candacestone2211 def communicate in advance and calmly let him know what's NOT OK with you also let him know if he continues you will leave *definitely align your words with actions & leave if he fails to correct his behavior.
A famous person said, " Stop letting people who do so little for you control so much of your mind, feelings and emotions." You are so young to be so wise, you are my greatiest inspiration, thank you.
Many guys these days in REALITY...wants a woman to chase them...spend money on them...are ill-responsible and illogical!!! Narcissistic personality disorders EVERYWHERE! Always need a body pic 🙄...famous questions are..."you drink?...you smoke?" Always some one night stand situations...Staying single too messy out here....
Meisha G I get asked 2 months after “ are you a virgin” Dude dude.. i end the entire convo. Two gonna happen, Imma be lablee a target or walked away from. Ill take the walk away instead.
Was chasing and I let go of him. Now he chases back, and says Why'd I leave him. Like why are men like this. And the Willingness to walk Away has given Me Strength, thanks keV ✨✨✨✨
I needed this, thank-you kev. I made a list of all my good qualities just now because I’m getting the slow fade from a guy who suddenly lost interest after 3 dates. I tortured myself thinking of what I could have done better or what I shouldn't have said. In the end, i'm just going to accept it and know that I have a lot to offer-- it's his loss for not recognizing that.
I’m getting the “slow fade”, too, sis. We just gotta slow fade ‘em right on back. It’s called mirroring (Tony Gaskins just did a video on mirroring). Kev is making some strong points here. Another great video. 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽
Dee_V I’m getting the “slow fade”, too, sis. We just gotta slow fade ‘em right on back. It’s called mirroring (Tony Gaskins just did a video on mirroring). Kev is making some strong points here. Another great video, sir. 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽
@@HonestyLove85 yes they had or mind all crewed up, fake love us, to use us, then have us wanting them from being traumatized. Im just getting over one that replaced me for someone after 2 years i am walking away for life.
U don't chase them cuz they were clever at getting under your skin (they are dumb because they mostly follow the same moves in their perfectly stained book), but because you are trying to "fix" something Don't try to fix, and you win your sanity.
To be honest, the power is in YOUR hands. They cant make you chase. They cant. They can try to control the situation in their favour so that you get the message you're supposed to chase but if you remove yourself from the power play, they lose. And you need to do is DO NOTHING. I know what I'm talking about. Had SO many of these types. In fact, I met one last weekend who tried to do this. The minute I sense games I.e. not replying texts, ignoring, silent treatment, mean comments, I shield it with self love ( I remind myself I am worthy ) and back off and block them. People cannot make you chase if you do not want to. They only seek out people who are devoid of self-love. People who think they need to chase the minute they stop chasing. No lovebombing in the world can move me. I already know I am beautiful. Self love is the ONLY repellant. Also, MIRROR their treatment. If they pull back, you pull back. They reply, you reply. They disappear, you disappear. They demean, you demean. HOLD THE MIRROR UP TO THEM. God bless you.
I think it’s a bigger problem and affects both sexes. I don’t think people are begging for love so much as they are begging to be treated respectfully and lovingly. You can’t receive love and respect from people who cannot or will not give it. There’s the rub. It’s not that the person doesn’t want your love and the benefits attached to it. It’s not that the person doesn’t love you (or wish he could love you.). It’s that many people don’t have it to give. It’s important to recognize the difference because it prevents unnecessary drama and self questioning. If someone is simply incapable of expressing love in the way you need it, it’s nothing on you. The reasons don’t matter.
"Oh, [he] clearly doesn't know who I am, but I do." This is the kind of positive energy and self-assurance I hope to cultivate. I'm on the way. Thank you for your great videos!
Yes chasing don't work at all always be in your female energy no matter what I learned this a long time ago at age 18 the men that have came into my life all went after me the only thing I'm chasing is money right now so relationships isn't a priority right now
I walked away from my last ex he didn't want to make positive changes to do better he didn't care or take me seriously he always sorry with excuses no consistency, broken words so i got tried and i moved on. Im glad i walked away and of course he want me back no way im not going back. Im not chasing no men and im not wasting my time on someone who don't care about me its not worth it. i deserve better i know my values and worth and im happy focusing on God and myself. God will bless me with the right husband one day. Thank you for this great message right on time.👏👏👍👍
I didn't chase, i told him i felt distant energy so said goodbye. He agreed, he hadn't chased and neither will i.. Its painful but clearly he wasn't into me. And i know my worth 👏 No longer will i doubt myself. Im trying to see it now that i dodged a bullet.. Blessing in disguise 👏
"Too many queens are chasing peasants for love" - Kev Hicks ... These words are so profound!!! Thanks Kev, keep doing what you are doing. We need you and your stellar advice even though some of us don't know it!!!
As a single black woman in 2019 I stand by every last one of these sentiments and rules I've been weeding them out one by one by taking alot of these smilar approaches thanks for the confirmation Kev 🤞♥️
i’ve only watched the first 20 sec. and already i COMPLETELY agree with him “losing self interests” , i became so mentally occupied with a guy i really lost myself ... he was the sweetest at first giving me more than enough attention , always saying the right things , really smooth and great in the sack then he faded away , i was doing almost EVERYTHING to get his attention again , i even tried ignoring him for days ... i was so lost because i became obsessed with getting him back , i forgot to take care of myself i was only concerned with getting him back nothing else , i stopped being happy , i was always frustrated , sad , mad and miserable and my social skills went out the window because i lost interest in all other guys my mind was always on him ... it was f*cked up but the guy making this video knows what he’s talking about , ok ima watch the rest of the video now
I went through almost the same thing... I hope ur doing better now and not talking to him. I'm going to take my advice and not talk to mine as well. It's the first time he doesn't text me for 3 consecutive days... He usually texts everyday........
Sam StarMuffin I hope your in a better head space darling don’t worry you will get over him it just takes them grieve the relationship and try to love yourself in his time. You also need to stop listening to love songs and start watching more comedy films and shows also spend time with family and friends.
I think the biggest mistake I ever made was falling in love with a man's potential. It was a fool's game and I never came to fruition!! Now, I if I don't see a man in the complete package that he should be, where his walk matches his talk, I just smile and walk away. 😉 Thank you for putting out your good advice by the way!! I hope young and older women are listening!!
I've always had men come back me and guess what, I never had sex with any of them!! I was celibate for 4 yrs before I got into another committed relationship. They all tell me the same thing, I respect you, you're creative, you're kind, I just dig you! The more you hold off, the easier saying no will become. Also your energy will show, I'm not about games, but if you genuinely want to have a great date, let's get it boo! Trust me, it works like a charm and you'll become the girlfriend if you want to be. You'll feel great bcz you've controlled your story.
I worked so hard at keeping a “ relationship “ together until I started watching your videos and other videos like this!! I offered way more than I received.. I dropped him and blocked him twice and finally a third time today!!! What a jerk but most of all what a waste of my valuable time and effort! I am amazing and I truly value myself.... come on ladies !! No more wasting time on unworthy men in 20/20!!! You are beautiful ❤️
I absolutely love this! I did the same smh I am still learning to love and accept myself and my flaws. I’m so happy for you to because it’s not easy especially when they keep trying to come back!
“Too many Queens on they knees begging peasants for love” You always telling the truth Kev. You’re te best. I’m going to put that quote on my fridge so I’ll never ever ever again chase an ignorant and indifferent guy who doesn’t deserve my love. Never again.
Kev you’re the truth. I never beg men, you’re either all in or all out and when out go and never come back. I know what I have to offer so it’s their loss. That’s why I’ve been single for a long ass time. I absolutely love it
It comes from self-love first, if you don’t have the same intentions but are desperate you may be vunerable to mistreatment. It all starts from having a healthy self esteem and knowing yourself before knowing someone else.
Many of us suffer from abandonment wounds (primarily women), which leads to limited or no boundaries. When you have have no boundaries, you will allow yourself to suffer all kinds of humiliation...in order not to be abandoned! It's a vicious cycle. But once you're made aware of it, you can do something about it. You'll know you're healed when you start to feel like it's a chase, and (fine as he is!), cut the cord.
after focusing on a guy I like so much. I had a Huge crush on him, and I made the mistake of chasing him and being super nice. So, he asked for my number and we barely text. I was the one always texting and he only showed me some attention at work, but never text to hang out or anything.. Watching these videos helped because it literally boosted my self esteem. I finally realised I'm to good for him, I'm not going to chase and I stopped texting him cold Turkey. stopped focusing on him and put his butt in the friend zone. After the boost of self confidence, I attracted a really cute nice guy who makes a effort to see me and have lunch with me..I'm taking it really slow and enjoying my confidence. Thank you for all the videos you put out
Love this!!!! I learned this lesson in 2019 it took ten months for me to value myself and your videos played a big part on the ongoing journey. I made a list last month and making sure I'm up to what I expect and accept from dudes is what I ask of myself too is key
Yes finally. I made a list a few months ago but it wasn’t until I really took in all the videos kev has made over this year and took time to build up my self worth that I’ve learned
Love that list.....I had to do that one. I must say it works... More than anything I had to decide that I was not going to let anybody define my worth. I had to do that for myself. Great video...
This was a very helpful. I am right at the "I have to walk away point". Never liking to chase a man, because you cant make a person interested in you that is not. Thanks for this message.
I walked away from my last dude. I felt like I was on top of the world. Even though I get my sad moments and think about him still...i still have a sense of self
I honestly don't think many women who are chasing them even know that they are. They are justifying or have trained themselves to not see it clearly. They think oh, "it's just a harmless text, who cares if he doesn't text back? it doesn't bother me." But, it MATTERS. And yes, a simple "wyd" text to him out of the blue IS chasing him!
Dang..God bless you and your family...thank u for this wonderful sermon..I FINALLY LEFT the narcissist after 11 months..but the last 2 I chased him it almost killed me in real life..I prayed and working on me exercising....DONT CHASE A MAN WHO WANTS YOU....IF HE SERIOUS U WON'T HAVE TO..
My story. Drawing boundaries and cutting my losses and investing alot more time in self preservation. Dont throw pearls to the swine. They dont want it. It's all or nothing...
This was hard to watch. Just broke up with some one who under valued me for years. Never had the guts to move on till I realized the relationship was toxic. It’s almost like, enough was enough 🙄. SUX I waited so long... you spoke the truth with this. It feels good to walk away actually. He didn’t even fight for it. I wanted change and he said ✌🏾😭😪. Been a roller coaster ride of emotions but like you said, “I was too fly for his ish” 🥰 thanks
Gabriela Rose I went through the same thing with my ex I finally let it go...I wasn’t about to keep going on with it when clearly there was no change on her part! So I been single every since I grew up
You videos have helped me out so much. I used to think that I was confident by knowing what I wanted from men and being the one to make the first move or making myself too available. I have stopped this behavior and the guys that I used to talk to suddenly disappeared, at first I couldn’t believe no guy was continuing to talk to me. Now I know that I was wrong and those guys were also wrong for me, I am now at peace and working on myself before I decide that a man is worth my time and energy again!
I love this! This is so true. I used to always try and please others. Now , I remind myself that I’m a great catch, good person and have a ton to offer. If you don’t invest in me, I’m not investing in you and wasting my time!
Very good young lady...... Now that's the truth there..... Good luck
5 лет назад+48
Damn this came right on time. Think im putting too much energy into this situationship, so starting today Im putting all my energy into me & if he is meant for me then he will be, other than that, i'm done trying 🤷🏽♀️
I can not say I am so glad I found your videos. I have been watching your videos for 3 days straight! Repeating over and over until I understood. I put a guy to the test that I have known(thought I knew) for 4 years. I always got mixed signals and I was tired of feeling this way. Turns out, the moment Im ready to confront him about his feelings about him and if we were going anywhere. He chooses to say," this is too much drama for me. I wish you luck in life". The moment I knew I needed to NOT BE AFRAID TO WALK AWAY. I have 4 years of experience now to know what red flags are from a guy. Thank you so much!
6:49 mark is always my attitude💯....if you don’t remind a man of WHO YOU ARE and what you bring to the table, they will surely and certainly take you for granted. Know your worth....always
I just wanted to point out one thing. If you don't want to chase then don't expect to be chased too. Just like some women here mentioned that they feel rejected, crushed and used at the end of chasing...it exactly how guy's feel after such an experience too. So it's quite justified for them to not focus on chasing you but instead on building themselves. If you two really like each other then there is no need for any games from either sides. Just a genuine expression of feelings. Now that we have ushered in this modern era of equality then we shall live as equals.
Again, your videos are always on point. I've been for the first time in my life on a situation when I was the one who was genuinely interested in a man and I proved it to him because there's no shame about having feelings for someone. But once I've done that, he changed his behavior. I felt he wasn't comfortable around me like he used to. I was always the one proposing activities, going dinner and he always found a way to skip me. Recently, I've confronted him about it and he told me he really liked me but was too afraid to go further because he's not used for a woman to like him and that I was too good for him...maybe he was right or was making excuses. I never asked him to be my boyfriend but his explanation was enough for me to just let it go and stop talking to him. It's been 2 weeks and I'm alright. But never again.. I feel stupid enough.
Women have to learn to set higher standards ! Don't date out of desperation ! Date because the man treats you well. Know your worth girls !! Stop having sex on first dates! Stop having coffee dates !
I'm making my list right now!!! Thank you for reminding me, how great, I really am!!! I tend to forget and allow the manipulators in. No more, I got this! You are a ""class act""!
I agree. They're adults by age but not in their thinking and actions. They want to be chased and taken care of, do everything for them with little or nothing in return. And most of them seem to be on games. The worst part is if you only realize this after getting married and/or had children with a man like this.
ruclips.net/channel/UCdpV_Xk8BoE99-LHS9GF8Jg New channel!!! Please subscribe!
He's Back. The homie Kev!Your content is sooo needed and necessary.
Thanks for posting... I needed this today.
Never have and never will. I am the lady. I will give you attention if I am interested but I will not Chase after a man.
Handsome 😍😩
Hi Kev... I really appreciate your perspective bcuz I spend a lot of time developing myself from Spirituality to motherhood & education etc but not a lot of time defining what I want from relationships or friendships for that matter... watching Ur videos is like taking a refresher course in self love...thanks for sharing 😏 Many Blessings
a wise person once told me “If you ain’t heard from him, he ain’t trying to hear from you. Keep it moving”
Word
😳AIN'T "THAT" THE TRUTH!!😂😂😂
Ms. A yes ! 💯🙌🏻🙌🏻
Lol...😅😂🤣
Facts 💯
Always remember : if he wanted to, HE WOULD
Right!! ruclips.net/channel/UCdpV_Xk8BoE99-LHS9GF8Jg
Love you for saying that Martha!!
Preach!!!
Same thing to the opposite side you fool...
Pzlsi Koleia obviously ?? but this video is about why you shouldn’t chase HIM
Women work too much on their relationships and not enough on themselves !! Y'all learn to be a little selfish or life will hit you !
Facts
Cant argue with you
FAXXXXX
Bel Bb Exactly!!
Amen!
My daddy told me to never chase a man. That a man knows, who he wants to be with & if they want me, then I won't have to chase him. He will come to me
Your dad was right ruclips.net/channel/UCdpV_Xk8BoE99-LHS9GF8Jg
Damn this was deep
Preach! It took me so long to understand that part. But it's so true!!!
True. If he saw it in me, then I don’t have to convince him to choose me . Simple as that
that's nice with that being said you don't have to wait for him to come after you and chase you either you can keep on moving to be with next man just even be better than the one you thought about chasing or waiting for
"Too many Queens on their knees begging peasants for love" .... Damn. You need to put that on a T-shirt.
✅ done! Coming tonight!
I could never under a woman that get on her knees. Girl get up and allow him to propose.
@@rickytanner3 😂😂😂😂😂😂🙈dead
@@KevHick YES ORDER FORM POST PLZ... HA HA !!
Is faaaaaaacts!!!!!!
I chased a guy for the first time and learned real quick. You feel so stupid and used by the end of it. Just pour that energy and love into people that deserve it. Such as your friends, family, yourself, or maybe even a homeless person. I didn’t need him anyway. I’m one semester away from receiving my bachelors in engineering. 🙌🏽💁🏽♀️
Yup, being through the same thing this year but you know what? It doesn't matter because you're the best. You go girl, I don't know you but I'm proud of you! Congrats on your bachelor diploma and keep slaying!
I am so proud of you!!!!! Congrats!!!!!
Did he come back?
Sorry y’all I had finals. But thank you all for your support!!! I truly feel like I have an army of strong and self aware women supporting me. 🤗 Side note: he either never came back or I just wouldn’t know. I cut off all contact with him and ended up moving a few months after. No need to dwell on something that was toxic
So proud of you
Don’t you hate when you had to learn this the hard way and here he is giving free game without the hurt 😩
😂😂😂👸🏽👸🏽💪🏾
Same...like literally today
Gurllll yes!😔
Jaz R 😫
Um yesssss. I say this all the time!
I haven’t attracted anyone since I stopped entertaining bullshit from men, but that’s better than being abused. It’s far better to be alone than to wish you were alone.
T jaxx life is surprisingly nice without a man in it making me cry. 🤷♀️
Facts... facts...
Omg this!!!❤❤❤
It's better to be single and alone than married and alone.
Your right
“Don't lose yourself trying to hold onto someone who doesn't care about losing you”. I absolutely live by this quote in all types of relationships.❤️
Belinda jacques 🙌🏽
❤
Well said.
🙌
Belinda jacques ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️ Noted‼️
"Men measure self confidence in women not by how you treat them, but by how you let them treat you" Aint that the damn truth. Absolute GOLD 🙌
💯%👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
When you know your worth, you don’t take rejection personally. Sometimes rejection is God’s protection. Keep it moving. You have plenty of options. You just need to get out of the house so you can meet them. Walk in your feminine energy, Queens!!
👌🏻👏🏻
That’s right!! God’s protection definitely!! 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
" *Stop* *settling* *for* *crumbs* *on* *the* *floor* *when* *you* *should* *be* *feasting* *at* *lifes* *table* "
Absolutely!! ruclips.net/channel/UCdpV_Xk8BoE99-LHS9GF8Jg
@@KevHick need a tattoo of that!!
Rejection makes you forget how much of a blessing you can be to someone. You only see what YOU lost, and neglect to realize what they lost. And when you tip the scale, the only person losing, is them.
yes. reminds you to be the dumper, not the dumpee. lol
Thanks, l needed to be reminded od this.
Right on time
"Always be willing to walk away from a bad investment"
Now that's the truth there
I stop doing that if your not feeling me or take interest in me and I don’t see it’s been reciprocated then I’m moving on not wasting my time!!
You crazy. I stay and become a problem until they notice me.
You shouldn't chase them in the first place
chelsie romero exactly
InnerRise 😂
@@InnerRise 🤣
It's interesting, I'm 22 and it seems like a lot of guys my age want to be chased rather than chase. There's been a role reversal and as the generations go by, the more passive guys get about chasing women. That's because all you need these days is to slide in dms, no up front approaches. There's a big disparity between older generations and the generation of men today
Well lets elaborate on these FACTS!...??????
SO TRUE!! alot of men think they are the prize and Women must chase them!!🙄🙄
They want to be chased!! Idk what is wrong with them
I've dated men 30-50 years of age some behave no different than men in their 20s. Unfortunately technology & fathers(not all) not raising their sons to become men caused a huge issue in dating/relationships.
@@kaoshi_kutie Men are the prize because they're the provider and protecter.Women only bring sex to the table and nothing else.
Unrequited love isn’t love. Chasing someone isn’t smart or necessary. Love yourself enough to believe that if someone doesn’t value you the way you deserve, it is best to move forward. No hard feelings.
Nothing is personal, nothing is perfect and nothing is permanent!
Greetings!
You're correct!
Also, Chasing....the male isn't even seen amongst the females and males of the animal Kingdom.
Consider the Eagle when chosing your mate.
Chose wisely BW (Daughters of Zion).
Also, make sure he's a brother that has "Submitted & Obey" The Commandments of his Heavenly Father.
He shouldn't be asking you to "Submit or Obey" his Rules & Regulations when he is disobeying the 10 Commandments of his Heavenly Father.
When a female eagle meets a male and they want to mate, she flies down to earth with the male pursuing her and she picks a twig. ... The female eagle grabs the twig and flies to a much higher altitude pursued by the male until she perceives it high enough, and then drops the twig for the male to chase.
The female eagle has a unique way of choosing her mate. Both men and women can learn from the process the female eagle put the male eagle through to see if he is qualified to mate her. One of the key lessons you will discover ladies, is that an eagle NEVER SETTLE-NO MATTER WHAT. One of the essential teachings a man can learn from this story is that a man must be prepared to pursue what he wants, and be willing to prove he is worthy and qualify for the pursuit.
When it comes time for the female eagle to choose her mate, she prepares herself for many suitors. She does not settle for the first male eagle who tries to get her attention. She does not settle because every other female eagle she knows has a mate. She practices self-control and wait while going through the process. Many male eagles will try to impress her. She will take her time and evaluate them over a period of time, make her decision based on her instincts and chooses a male Eagle to fly with for a while.
This is equivalent to dating, just because someone takes you out on a date does not mean he or she is the right one for you. The reason for dating is to see if this person is the right fit for you. The female eagle does not allow herself to become emotionally connected to the male eagle, but rather stick with her plan without any distractions. Her focus is to make sure he fits the profile she has in mind. She does not have the time to be fooling around with male eagles that has no character and values. The male eagle she chooses will be her mate for the rest of her life. She will not mate with another male eagle unless her mate dies. It is important to her not to rush the process. If you learn to take your emotion out of the initial dating phase and focus on the knowing phase you will be fine. Relationships are too important and yet complicated to be rushed into because it takes time to get to know someone. Remember to put logic before emotions and allow the spirit of God to lead you.
The female eagle will fly with the male eagle for a while and if she likes the way he flies, she will put him through a series of test. When you are dating or being pursued as a love interest and you are pleased and impressed with the way they are treating you, then you can move to what we called the Relationship Appraisal Process (RAP). This is where you ask the critical questions as it pertains to their intention of a relationship with you. This is similar to what the female eagle does. If the female eagle does not see the male eagle as a potential mate, they do not initiate the test but rather move on to the next male eagle trying to find a better fit.
Few Key Tests A Male Eagle Must Pass
TEST # 1
The female eagle picks up a piece of stick and flies high with it. At some point she will drop the stick to see if the male eagle can catch it. He is not qualified to be with her just by good looks he has to do some work. The male eagle has to show his proficiency in these tests and if he passes the first test she moves to the next.
TEST # 2
The female eagle finds a larger stick and flies with it much higher the second time around. Each time the male catches the stick, she continues with the next process. Some of you say yes to a man just because he is Christian. Some of you say yes to a woman because of their anointing or their beauty. A man can be good to you and not necessarily good for you. A woman can be good to you and not good for you. If the man is not in a position to marry he should not be pursuing a serious relationship.
TEST #3
Again, the female eagle picks up a larger piece of stick and even flies higher and drops it. If he wants her that bad, he must be willing to prove himself. If the male eagle drops the stick, he is automatically disqualified. There are no second or third chances.
TEST #4
She then finds the largest stick that she can carry, and at this point the stick is the size of a small log! She can still fly very high with this large stick. At any time in this process, if the male fails to catch the stick, she flies away from him as her signal that the test is now over and she begins her search all over again. Her character and integrity will not allow her to settle, and she will not compromise her reputation for love. She will not lower her standard to fit the male eagle. Some of you are doing just that in your pursuit of love.
~Shalom~
🕊
🌞
🤴🏾
🐏🐑🐏🕎🐏🐑🐏
👑
👸🏽
🌕
Well said
🙏💯
Like my Grandaddy said he rode the bike hours to see my grandma no shoes on. He held his shoes in his hand because my grandmother father told him he better not come over in dirty shoes. So the moral to the story is if a man want you he will do anything neccessary to be with you. You don't ever have to chase him. I hit that subscribe button many of us need to hear this.
I know this is an old comment but my first love we were teenagers swam across a lake cut down a hornets nest and ran to my house stung and all I because he “couldn’t afford flowers for my birthday” I don’t know how he did it 🤦🏼♀️ but he brought me a hornets nest a soda and a pop tart ( we were young and he was very poor) moral of the story if he wanted to he would !!
We as women, have to be the prize !!
bigjayking24 lol no!
Amennnnnnn
bigjayking24 I see
If me as a woman ain't the prize, then there is no prize !
Bel Bb Period
When a woman gets more interested in herself improvement and her money the right type of men will FIND HER no woman with wisdom goes looking for a man
Shanell Pittman okay well explain why there are so many beautiful successful women still single 🤔 since the right man just comes along naturally???
Janay Nikki Because they more worried about trying to catch a man. Why are women so hard up to show what she got to offer
Shanell Pittman apparently not if they’re successful. To be successful you would have to invest a lot of time and attention into that and you wouldn’t be able to do that if your worried about chasing somebody
Janay Nikki you would think but to many women are trying to convince a man
C'mon now!! Well stated and duly noted!!
The more you DON'T chase men, the MORE he'll chase you, men like to chase and women liked to be pursued,.. never act NEEDY or CONTROLLING. Don't act B***** just be CONFIDENT and Happy, the KEY to a KEEPER of the man, also keep the some mystery about yourself and open up little by little
I know that’s right! I love that! Make a list of why you’re worth it! Awesome advice to women! I think I do a pretty good job at being the doormat, and that I SERIOUSLY need to work on! Thanks for the video!
well said, this was right on point
So true Florida Girl about opening up lil by lil!!!!!! Don't give them too much about your past and why things didn't work out in other relationships.cause while you're talking he's taking notes on all your weak points!! Then BOOM!!! Wham bam thank you mam he's gone that damn quick and done with us!! I had to learn too!! Staying single for now... I'm gud! Lol
Yep and it'll repel the duds a hell of a lot faster! Even though I haven't gotten serious with anyone yet ALL guys I have dated have properly tried to pursue me, take me out and treated me well
@@aprilsunshine7565 well sometimes it's the guy that blabs endlessly about his ex and makes himself look like an idiot and a turn off.
I just don't give a F anymore.
Now men don't even know what to do with me. I walk away so smooth, they get stuck between pride and stupidity, lost af. I know my worth. On to the Next.
I'm not saving nobody but my damn self.
Hahaha 😂 I’m agree with you - the guy I like doesn’t chase me anymore and he became distant so next time we saw each other I just walk away after spending some time together. But he doesn’t knows my intention and he called me next day and I didn’t answer and I won’t answer to him anymore. He already told me that he doesn’t have time to offer to me a relationship - so there is not reason for me to answer him. Period!
Me soon! 💪💪💪💪
Yep. Bravo 👏🏽 not giving a A is a definite game changer
I heard that queen!!!! Me too!!! And then they call you crazy or stuck up because you value yourself!!! Lol oh well so be it!!!
Greetings!
You're correct!
Also, Chasing....the male isn't even seen amongst the females and males of the animal Kingdom.
Consider the Eagle when chosing your mate.
Chose wisely BW (Daughters of Zion).
Also, make sure he's a brother that has "Submitted & Obey" The Commandments of his Heavenly Father.
He shouldn't be asking you to "Submit or Obey" his Rules & Regulations when he is disobeying the 10 Commandments of his Heavenly Father.
When a female eagle meets a male and they want to mate, she flies down to earth with the male pursuing her and she picks a twig. ... The female eagle grabs the twig and flies to a much higher altitude pursued by the male until she perceives it high enough, and then drops the twig for the male to chase.
The female eagle has a unique way of choosing her mate. Both men and women can learn from the process the female eagle put the male eagle through to see if he is qualified to mate her. One of the key lessons you will discover ladies, is that an eagle NEVER SETTLE-NO MATTER WHAT. One of the essential teachings a man can learn from this story is that a man must be prepared to pursue what he wants, and be willing to prove he is worthy and qualify for the pursuit.
When it comes time for the female eagle to choose her mate, she prepares herself for many suitors. She does not settle for the first male eagle who tries to get her attention. She does not settle because every other female eagle she knows has a mate. She practices self-control and wait while going through the process. Many male eagles will try to impress her. She will take her time and evaluate them over a period of time, make her decision based on her instincts and chooses a male Eagle to fly with for a while.
This is equivalent to dating, just because someone takes you out on a date does not mean he or she is the right one for you. The reason for dating is to see if this person is the right fit for you. The female eagle does not allow herself to become emotionally connected to the male eagle, but rather stick with her plan without any distractions. Her focus is to make sure he fits the profile she has in mind. She does not have the time to be fooling around with male eagles that has no character and values. The male eagle she chooses will be her mate for the rest of her life. She will not mate with another male eagle unless her mate dies. It is important to her not to rush the process. If you learn to take your emotion out of the initial dating phase and focus on the knowing phase you will be fine. Relationships are too important and yet complicated to be rushed into because it takes time to get to know someone. Remember to put logic before emotions and allow the spirit of God to lead you.
The female eagle will fly with the male eagle for a while and if she likes the way he flies, she will put him through a series of test. When you are dating or being pursued as a love interest and you are pleased and impressed with the way they are treating you, then you can move to what we called the Relationship Appraisal Process (RAP). This is where you ask the critical questions as it pertains to their intention of a relationship with you. This is similar to what the female eagle does. If the female eagle does not see the male eagle as a potential mate, they do not initiate the test but rather move on to the next male eagle trying to find a better fit.
Few Key Tests A Male Eagle Must Pass
TEST # 1
The female eagle picks up a piece of stick and flies high with it. At some point she will drop the stick to see if the male eagle can catch it. He is not qualified to be with her just by good looks he has to do some work. The male eagle has to show his proficiency in these tests and if he passes the first test she moves to the next.
TEST # 2
The female eagle finds a larger stick and flies with it much higher the second time around. Each time the male catches the stick, she continues with the next process. Some of you say yes to a man just because he is Christian. Some of you say yes to a woman because of their anointing or their beauty. A man can be good to you and not necessarily good for you. A woman can be good to you and not good for you. If the man is not in a position to marry he should not be pursuing a serious relationship.
TEST #3
Again, the female eagle picks up a larger piece of stick and even flies higher and drops it. If he wants her that bad, he must be willing to prove himself. If the male eagle drops the stick, he is automatically disqualified. There are no second or third chances.
TEST #4
She then finds the largest stick that she can carry, and at this point the stick is the size of a small log! She can still fly very high with this large stick. At any time in this process, if the male fails to catch the stick, she flies away from him as her signal that the test is now over and she begins her search all over again. Her character and integrity will not allow her to settle, and she will not compromise her reputation for love. She will not lower her standard to fit the male eagle. Some of you are doing just that in your pursuit of love.
~Shalom~
🕊
🌞
🤴🏾
🐏🐑🐏🕎🐏🐑🐏
👑
👸🏽
🌕
I gave up long time ago lol. Too many rules of dating. Its's like a second job and not even fun anymore.
You're right it's like a work to hell with men
AAAAAH I'm so glad I'm not the only one who sees it that way. Like its so much deciphering and investigative work, shit sounds fucking exhausting and my job already sucks the soul out of me, lol maybe thats why I''ve been on like 2 dates this entire year.
💯💯💯💯💯!!!!
@bigjayking24 does it mean that you know too much about relationship dear 😂😂😂men like this men hate that all the time!! Am done with the fucking shit so called men to hell
bigjayking24 not that easy lol
It's so much better being ALONE and SINGLE...then WAITING for his Texts...his calls...his ATTENTION that is long gone and never coming Back. Your FREE! Find someone who will appreciate you! ❤️
🙌🏾😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
A one sided relationship is my worst nightmare. You know deep in your heart that he can take you or leave you and so does anyone around you two. I deserve mutuality and reciprocation.
Absolutely right!! ruclips.net/channel/UCdpV_Xk8BoE99-LHS9GF8Jg
You can’t have any relationship without reciprocity. So take him or leave him as well. I’d been there with a guy recently who came on strong like urine in the beginning then slowed down because he felt ‘I wasn’t chasing back’. Then his attitude turned into take it or leave it. Well, being the queen of dumpville, that was no hard call for me. I think the problem with a lot of us women today is because we like the guy, we don’t want to hurt him.’ Hurt him. Cause him real pain because he won’t be afraid to do the same to you. Pull the trigger and mirror them. If he can take it or leave. You can too
Lisa Quaye So true. Nice for what! And that guy was trying to get you to chase him. He thinks he’s the prize. Ha! Glad you set him straight.
Yeah one sided love is one of the most painful experiences ever. Nowadays, people just want your body but not your genuinely loving heart and soul .
@@MegaLadylove2012 its easy when they its obvious theyre not interested, cuz usually they stop calling or asking you out as much, so you dont even have to do anything, lol. but whats frustrating is when they keep contacting you and making it seem like they care, then after a while you realize its all shallow and theyre not even interested in you, just in keeping you around and keeping themselves entertained. that's what really pisses me off, wasting youre time on a needy ass chump.
I don’t even have the energy to chase men
girl this is facts and same here 😩
Same here
Lol I really don’t
This video made me cry. I noticed I'm always the one chasing men and what they usually do two of three things he mentioned in the video. Either the reject me or not put in half the effort I do when it comes to a realationship. I'm still learning to love myself and see my value. It's a uphill battle but I will get there
Same girl
You got this! Keep working on YOU.
I used to chase guys too, I’m feeling so stupid right now.
@@dani2959 girl it happens. But I honestly believes it comes down to your self worth and love you have for yourself. Its so important to ask if you truly loved yourself would you be chasing after someone? the men should be chasing after us
Yohonna Brewer keep going Yohanna, and don’t stop until you get there. I’m rooting for you❣️@Robin D, I absolutely love what you wrote to Yohonna. Godspeed Queen ❤️
Don’t chase men...Willing to walk away to any toxicity is a courageous act and respect to yourself. As usual, great message Kev!💕 Thank you!
Absolutely and thank you!
Sky Dream I admire you! I know it wasn’t easy.
Great point. Now I understand why you should chase bags instead. lol
RIGHT!!!!
Preach lol
Haha foreal tho👌
AMEN To that!!! 💯💯💯
Better Late Than Broke period
Yes. The egg does not chase the sperm!!
Point blank!!
Period pooh
❤😂🤸♂️🤸♀️
Facts👌
Best comment ever
I walk with an "aw hell no" if a man is mistreating, disrespecting, demeaning, belittling, or treating me with any sort of low value...it's nice hearing this coming from a man
Ladies believe me when I tell you this! By experience when I stand my ground and distance myself after disliking guy's behavior 99.9% of the time they contact me and I have the upper hand!
*Great Video Kev! 👌
Most of the time they do. By that time I am no longer interested.
Do you tell them or bring up what's bothering you?
@@candacestone2211 def communicate in advance and calmly let him know what's NOT OK with you also let him know if he continues you will leave *definitely align your words with actions & leave if he fails to correct his behavior.
❤❤Please don't chase a guy.... ever! Love yourself
A famous person said, " Stop letting people who do so little for you control so much of your mind, feelings and emotions." You are so young to be so wise, you are my greatiest inspiration, thank you.
Many guys these days in REALITY...wants a woman to chase them...spend money on them...are ill-responsible and illogical!!! Narcissistic personality disorders EVERYWHERE! Always need a body pic 🙄...famous questions are..."you drink?...you smoke?" Always some one night stand situations...Staying single too messy out here....
Agreed.
I just said why is the first question they ask is if you smoke or drink👀
Tell me why i thought that was a Detroit male thing....🙄 all the time
@@AnonymousLioness_97 No I'm in North Carolina. Its everywhere 😏
Meisha G
I get asked 2 months after “ are you a virgin”
Dude dude.. i end the entire convo. Two gonna happen, Imma be lablee a target or walked away from. Ill take the walk away instead.
Was chasing and I let go of him.
Now he chases back, and says Why'd I leave him. Like why are men like this.
And the Willingness to walk Away has given Me Strength, thanks keV ✨✨✨✨
I needed this, thank-you kev. I made a list of all my good qualities just now because I’m getting the slow fade from a guy who suddenly lost interest after 3 dates. I tortured myself thinking of what I could have done better or what I shouldn't have said. In the end, i'm just going to accept it and know that I have a lot to offer-- it's his loss for not recognizing that.
I LOVE it Sis!!👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Dee_V yes you probably saved yourself 👏🏼 or he’s stuck on an ex
🙌🏾🙌🏾👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
I’m getting the “slow fade”, too, sis. We just gotta slow fade ‘em right on back. It’s called mirroring (Tony Gaskins just did a video on mirroring). Kev is making some strong points here. Another great video. 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽
Dee_V I’m getting the “slow fade”, too, sis. We just gotta slow fade ‘em right on back. It’s called mirroring (Tony Gaskins just did a video on mirroring). Kev is making some strong points here. Another great video, sir. 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽
“See what he is, not what you make him or what he can become” best advice I used throughout 2019 ! 🙌🏽😅
ruclips.net/channel/UCdpV_Xk8BoE99-LHS9GF8Jg
“ Men measure self belief in women Not by how you treat them, but by how you let them treat you “ Ameen 🙌🏽
You need to do a video on how narcissists start out love bombing and somehow manipulate the situation that you start chasing them and how to avoid it.
Yes! Omg my current situation. I'm the prize but somehow the tables turned. Real life sociopath and narcissist
@@HonestyLove85 yes they had or mind all crewed up, fake love us, to use us, then have us wanting them from being traumatized. Im just getting over one that replaced me for someone after 2 years i am walking away for life.
U don't chase them cuz they were clever at getting under your skin (they are dumb because they mostly follow the same moves in their perfectly stained book), but because you are trying to "fix" something
Don't try to fix, and you win your sanity.
To be honest, the power is in YOUR hands. They cant make you chase. They cant. They can try to control the situation in their favour so that you get the message you're supposed to chase but if you remove yourself from the power play, they lose.
And you need to do is DO NOTHING.
I know what I'm talking about.
Had SO many of these types. In fact, I met one last weekend who tried to do this.
The minute I sense games I.e. not replying texts, ignoring, silent treatment, mean comments, I shield it with self love ( I remind myself I am worthy ) and back off and block them.
People cannot make you chase if you do not want to.
They only seek out people who are devoid of self-love.
People who think they need to chase the minute they stop chasing.
No lovebombing in the world can move me.
I already know I am beautiful.
Self love is the ONLY repellant.
Also, MIRROR their treatment.
If they pull back, you pull back.
They reply, you reply.
They disappear, you disappear.
They demean, you demean.
HOLD THE MIRROR UP TO THEM.
God bless you.
@@givegodthanks good for you stay strong. Relationships are very challenging. Although they should not be.
*Too Many Queens On Their Knees Begging Peasants For Love*
*Talk Up Di Tings Dem Mi G 👀*
💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾
BOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!! Now that is the statement of the century! You must know your worth!!!!
Facts
I think it’s a bigger problem and affects both sexes. I don’t think people are begging for love so much as they are begging to be treated respectfully and lovingly.
You can’t receive love and respect from people who cannot or will not give it. There’s the rub. It’s not that the person doesn’t want your love and the benefits attached to it. It’s not that the person doesn’t love you (or wish he could love you.). It’s that many people don’t have it to give.
It’s important to recognize the difference because it prevents unnecessary drama and self questioning. If someone is simply incapable of expressing love in the way you need it, it’s nothing on you. The reasons don’t matter.
A Masion Sooo true. Just facts on top of facts. You smart❤️
"Oh, [he] clearly doesn't know who I am, but I do." This is the kind of positive energy and self-assurance I hope to cultivate. I'm on the way. Thank you for your great videos!
My pleasure 😇
I loved this too
Basically dating is like a job interview you either get valued or rejected
Spot on!
Yes chasing don't work at all always be in your female energy no matter what I learned this a long time ago at age 18 the men that have came into my life all went after me the only thing I'm chasing is money right now so relationships isn't a priority right now
Chasing a man is a waste of time. If there not intrested, their not going intrested. Learn that hard way
You are correct. I've done it before. Forgetting who I was and what I stood for. Until a friend snapped me out of it and reminded me of who I am.
I walked away from my last ex he didn't want to make positive changes to do better he didn't care or take me seriously he always sorry with excuses no consistency, broken words so i got tried and i moved on. Im glad i walked away and of course he want me back no way im not going back. Im not chasing no men and im not wasting my time on someone who don't care about me its not worth it. i deserve better i know my values and worth and im happy focusing on God and myself. God will bless me with the right husband one day. Thank you for this great message right on time.👏👏👍👍
"Ppl will believe what you appear to believe about yourself"...that resonated!
I didn't chase, i told him i felt distant energy so said goodbye. He agreed, he hadn't chased and neither will i.. Its painful but clearly he wasn't into me. And i know my worth 👏
No longer will i doubt myself. Im trying to see it now that i dodged a bullet.. Blessing in disguise 👏
"Too many queens are chasing peasants for love" - Kev Hicks ... These words are so profound!!! Thanks Kev, keep doing what you are doing. We need you and your stellar advice even though some of us don't know it!!!
Exactly caught him cheating just yesterday and Im done. I love me too much and deserve too be loved and respected.
Oh no 🤦🏽♂️. Don’t go back
@@KevHick It's hard but I know I deserve better. He's a narcissist and a sociopath. Frfr
As a single black woman in 2019 I stand by every last one of these sentiments and rules I've been weeding them out one by one by taking alot of these smilar approaches thanks for the confirmation Kev 🤞♥️
Yes girl. He said it all.
You are the best thing for women on RUclips 👍🏼
Margarita M. And BREENY Lee . Visit her channel and thank me later hun
I don’t like Kev cause he always talking about me 😩 but I come back for him to bully me every single time.. #truthhurts
Kkkkkkkk I see you
i’ve only watched the first 20 sec. and already i COMPLETELY agree with him “losing self interests” , i became so mentally occupied with a guy i really lost myself ... he was the sweetest at first giving me more than enough attention , always saying the right things , really smooth and great in the sack then he faded away , i was doing almost EVERYTHING to get his attention again , i even tried ignoring him for days ... i was so lost because i became obsessed with getting him back , i forgot to take care of myself i was only concerned with getting him back nothing else , i stopped being happy , i was always frustrated , sad , mad and miserable and my social skills went out the window because i lost interest in all other guys my mind was always on him ... it was f*cked up but the guy making this video knows what he’s talking about , ok ima watch the rest of the video now
Sam StarMuffin have you gotten over the guy??
I hope everything is better for you
I went through almost the same thing... I hope ur doing better now and not talking to him. I'm going to take my advice and not talk to mine as well. It's the first time he doesn't text me for 3 consecutive days... He usually texts everyday........
Sam StarMuffin I hope your in a better head space darling don’t worry you will get over him it just takes them grieve the relationship and try to love yourself in his time. You also need to stop listening to love songs and start watching more comedy films and shows also spend time with family and friends.
I think the biggest mistake I ever made was falling in love with a man's potential. It was a fool's game and I never came to fruition!! Now, I if I don't see a man in the complete package that he should be, where his walk matches his talk, I just smile and walk away. 😉 Thank you for putting out your good advice by the way!! I hope young and older women are listening!!
I've always had men come back me and guess what, I never had sex with any of them!! I was celibate for 4 yrs before I got into another committed relationship. They all tell me the same thing, I respect you, you're creative, you're kind, I just dig you! The more you hold off, the easier saying no will become. Also your energy will show, I'm not about games, but if you genuinely want to have a great date, let's get it boo! Trust me, it works like a charm and you'll become the girlfriend if you want to be. You'll feel great bcz you've controlled your story.
I’ve noticed this too since I’ve stopped having sex with them, it drives them crazy and they keep coming back
Love this video. I used to struggle with low self esteem but once I realized my worth, no man walked over me again! 🌼
I worked so hard at keeping a “ relationship “ together until I started watching your videos and other videos like this!! I offered way more than I received.. I dropped him and blocked him twice and finally a third time today!!! What a jerk but most of all what a waste of my valuable time and effort!
I am amazing and I truly value myself.... come on ladies !! No more wasting time on unworthy men in 20/20!!!
You are beautiful ❤️
Jodian great! You?
I absolutely love this! I did the same smh I am still learning to love and accept myself and my flaws. I’m so happy for you to because it’s not easy especially when they keep trying to come back!
I just did this today. thanks
"The
SECRET
To being
Taken
Seriously"
*DON'T*
*CHASE*
*MEN* 👈👏
“Don’t chase men.” I needed to hear this. Thank you.
“Too many Queens on they knees begging peasants for love” You always telling the truth Kev. You’re te best. I’m going to put that quote on my fridge so I’ll never ever ever again chase an ignorant and indifferent guy who doesn’t deserve my love. Never again.
Kev you’re the truth. I never beg men, you’re either all in or all out and when out go and never come back. I know what I have to offer so it’s their loss. That’s why I’ve been single for a long ass time. I absolutely love it
It comes from self-love first, if you don’t have the same intentions but are desperate you may be vunerable to mistreatment. It all starts from having a healthy self esteem and knowing yourself before knowing someone else.
Many of us suffer from abandonment wounds (primarily women), which leads to limited or no boundaries. When you have have no boundaries, you will allow yourself to suffer all kinds of humiliation...in order not to be abandoned! It's a vicious cycle. But once you're made aware of it, you can do something about it.
You'll know you're healed when you start to feel like it's a chase, and (fine as he is!), cut the cord.
🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
You hit the nail on the head right there!!! 👏👏👏👏
Well said I literally just cut off the cord
after focusing on a guy I like so much. I had a Huge crush on him, and I made the mistake of chasing him and being super nice. So, he asked for my number and we barely text. I was the one always texting and he only showed me some attention at work, but never text to hang out or anything..
Watching these videos helped because it literally boosted my self esteem. I finally realised I'm to good for him, I'm not going to chase and I stopped texting him cold Turkey. stopped focusing on him and put his butt in the friend zone. After the boost of self confidence, I attracted a really cute nice guy who makes a effort to see me and have lunch with me..I'm taking it really slow and enjoying my confidence.
Thank you for all the videos you put out
Love this!!!! I learned this lesson in 2019 it took ten months for me to value myself and your videos played a big part on the ongoing journey. I made a list last month and making sure I'm up to what I expect and accept from dudes is what I ask of myself too is key
💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾👸🏽👸🏽👸🏽👸🏽
@Alisha Guide...... yeeees girl good for you! And I’m starting my list now!!!!!! Took me 8 months to learn the hard way also.
Yes finally. I made a list a few months ago but it wasn’t until I really took in all the videos kev has made over this year and took time to build up my self worth that I’ve learned
"Not how you treat them but how you let them treat you". Eye opener.
I think this is my favorite advice video .
Those things are do able.
Thanks so much for this good advices !! Women have to learn to be in touch with their femininity ! Stop chasing men, work on yourselves !
🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾
i keep forgetting how it’s better to be single than to be with someone who treats you like trash
Amen amen amen
I have been single for a long time. I not about to settle for a man with a line and no job or income. I took care of a boy who is now a man my son
Love that list.....I had to do that one. I must say it works... More than anything I had to decide that I was not going to let anybody define my worth. I had to do that for myself. Great video...
Thank you 😊
This was a very helpful. I am right at the "I have to walk away point". Never liking to chase a man, because you cant make a person interested in you that is not. Thanks for this message.
Me too I literally just blocked him and I’m walking away
You’re the best. No more selling myself short, and no more settling for boys who can’t “see” me.
I walked away from my last dude. I felt like I was on top of the world. Even though I get my sad moments and think about him still...i still have a sense of self
"He clearly doesn't know who I am but I do. I ain't gonna take this shxt!" Thank you Kevin
I honestly don't think many women who are chasing them even know that they are. They are justifying or have trained themselves to not see it clearly. They think oh, "it's just a harmless text, who cares if he doesn't text back? it doesn't bother me." But, it MATTERS. And yes, a simple "wyd" text to him out of the blue IS chasing him!
💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾
persona non grata yess I was once like this and had to examine my actions and realize I was chasing once I figured that out I was done with chasing
Yes. Many are also being manipulated. Alot of these guys are players and extremely manipulative.
This advice is priceless & a great reminder of who I am and why I should not tolerate poor treatment from anybody.
Thank you!
Self esteem is a great asset.
Kev, has this really smooth and comforting voice. Like he can say something mean and it would still sound nice. Yikes love you kev.
Dang..God bless you and your family...thank u for this wonderful sermon..I FINALLY LEFT the narcissist after 11 months..but the last 2 I chased him it almost killed me in real life..I prayed and working on me exercising....DONT CHASE A MAN WHO WANTS YOU....IF HE SERIOUS U WON'T HAVE TO..
“People will believe about you what you believe about yourself so believe that you worth it!”
My story. Drawing boundaries and cutting my losses and investing alot more time in self preservation. Dont throw pearls to the swine. They dont want it. It's all or nothing...
You so good 😆. The man is supposed to take the lead.. If he doesn't, he doesn't want, care or value you enough.
This was hard to watch. Just broke up with some one who under valued me for years. Never had the guts to move on till I realized the relationship was toxic. It’s almost like, enough was enough 🙄. SUX I waited so long... you spoke the truth with this. It feels good to walk away actually. He didn’t even fight for it. I wanted change and he said ✌🏾😭😪. Been a roller coaster ride of emotions but like you said, “I was too fly for his ish” 🥰 thanks
Better late than never 😉
Gabriela Rose I went through the same thing with my ex I finally let it go...I wasn’t about to keep going on with it when clearly there was no change on her part! So I been single every since I grew up
This is pure truth you just summed up here. This is what every woman needs to know!!!You deserve a standing ovation for this. Thanks
Thank you 😊 If you like this channel you may enjoy my other channel Kev Hick Talks Life ruclips.net/channel/UCQjRFZEvlsdkxgV_dq_kAqw
6:45 - 6:49 😂😂😂 LOL. "I ain't about to take this s*#t." Perfect timing, Kev. Thank you. 🤣
"he doesn t know you but you do.."
It says it all.
You videos have helped me out so much. I used to think that I was confident by knowing what I wanted from men and being the one to make the first move or making myself too available. I have stopped this behavior and the guys that I used to talk to suddenly disappeared, at first I couldn’t believe no guy was continuing to talk to me. Now I know that I was wrong and those guys were also wrong for me, I am now at peace and working on myself before I decide that a man is worth my time and energy again!
I love this! This is so true. I used to always try and please others. Now , I remind myself that I’m a great catch, good person and have a ton to offer. If you don’t invest in me, I’m not investing in you and wasting my time!
Very good young lady...... Now that's the truth there..... Good luck
Damn this came right on time. Think im putting too much energy into this situationship, so starting today Im putting all my energy into me & if he is meant for me then he will be, other than that, i'm done trying 🤷🏽♀️
Brí Akílah 💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾♥️♥️ I hope you’ve seen a change babygirl 💯🙏🏾
If he wanted you to be his girlfriend you would have been. It’s better off that you cut your losses now
How did things go with him?
I can not say I am so glad I found your videos. I have been watching your videos for 3 days straight! Repeating over and over until I understood. I put a guy to the test that I have known(thought I knew) for 4 years. I always got mixed signals and I was tired of feeling this way. Turns out, the moment Im ready to confront him about his feelings about him and if we were going anywhere. He chooses to say," this is too much drama for me. I wish you luck in life". The moment I knew I needed to NOT BE AFRAID TO WALK AWAY. I have 4 years of experience now to know what red flags are from a guy. Thank you so much!
6:49 mark is always my attitude💯....if you don’t remind a man of WHO YOU ARE and what you bring to the table, they will surely and certainly take you for granted. Know your worth....always
I just wanted to point out one thing. If you don't want to chase then don't expect to be chased too. Just like some women here mentioned that they feel rejected, crushed and used at the end of chasing...it exactly how guy's feel after such an experience too. So it's quite justified for them to not focus on chasing you but instead on building themselves. If you two really like each other then there is no need for any games from either sides. Just a genuine expression of feelings. Now that we have ushered in this modern era of equality then we shall live as equals.
Again, your videos are always on point. I've been for the first time in my life on a situation when I was the one who was genuinely interested in a man and I proved it to him because there's no shame about having feelings for someone. But once I've done that, he changed his behavior. I felt he wasn't comfortable around me like he used to. I was always the one proposing activities, going dinner and he always found a way to skip me. Recently, I've confronted him about it and he told me he really liked me but was too afraid to go further because he's not used for a woman to like him and that I was too good for him...maybe he was right or was making excuses. I never asked him to be my boyfriend but his explanation was enough for me to just let it go and stop talking to him. It's been 2 weeks and I'm alright. But never again.. I feel stupid enough.
Same situation right here girl 😭 never again
Women have to learn to set higher standards ! Don't date out of desperation ! Date because the man treats you well. Know your worth girls !! Stop having sex on first dates! Stop having coffee dates !
You're so good!!! I walked away a few days ago and you gave me exactly what I needed to never go back
I'm making my list right now!!! Thank you for reminding me, how great, I really am!!! I tend to forget and allow the manipulators in. No more, I got this! You are a ""class act""!
Why the heck does it feel like it is so much work to deal with males ? 🤦😒
I agree. They're adults by age but not in their thinking and actions. They want to be chased and taken care of, do everything for them with little or nothing in return. And most of them seem to be on games. The worst part is if you only realize this after getting married and/or had children with a man like this.
Cuz it unfortunately is
Exactly!! I’m at the point where I don’t care anymore
Because it IS