From someone who struggles with crippling anxiety and is extremely avoidant, the last part of the vid helped alot. I have no friends, never been in a relationship, and i am in my mid 20's, the only thing that keeps me grounded is my family. I hope things get better for you.
There’s an old saying that goes…”no man is an island”, and it basically means none of us can, are or meant to exist without interacting with others. That’s what I like about RUclips, even though it’s not as organic as it used to be, it can still serve as a means to connect people to each other. And even if it isn’t “real life”, it is still real in terms of energy exchange. Especially while you’re still a smaller creator, you can build a lil community of people that are interested in what you have to say! Might even make a pal or two. In any case, life ebbs and flows…some days will be good, and some not, but you can get where you’re going. One foot in front of the other.
I was nodding the whole way through. I’ve been isolated for over 2 years… no friends, family, etc. It’s soul destroying, maddening. Makes you think about death. Those who preach about individualism have never experienced extreme isolation or loneliness. You’re constantly in fight-or-flight desperately seeking connection, so there’s no way to self-actualise. Think Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. Thanks for being vulnerable, this was very relatable and helpful.
i fw that mirror analogy hella brahh. ive struggled w depression in the past and i only clicked on this video because the main reason i got depressed was because i isolated myself, pandemic also didnt help and it happened at the same time, i find it rly hard to socialize with anyone, unless they are extremely close to me or im on xans or i smoked a joint or sum i cant rly connect with strangers or family irl, i just started talking to my dad about shit and every single conversation we've had so far i cried like a river got connected to my eye sockets lmfao, because i havent been able to connect with him or anyone in my family so i decided to take the first step and its honestly the best thing ive ever done in my life. i fucking love this video you seem hella sweet and smart ash just from watching you speak for 20 minutes lol, cheers 🙏
u are not alone, i’m in my last year of highschool after moving from my hometown two years ago to where i am now, then working 3 full time jobs while doing online school, eventually forcing me to go back in person for college although i know the detriment it puts my health in-and im absent more than half the week due to schizophrenia, depression, social anxiety, autism, and ive lost all of my friends, my boyfriend, i live alone in an old shed i renovated to be an apartment, and have little to no familial support; this being said, it doesn’t get easier. we just get stronger. i believe in you, when u wake up every morning, the first gifts you get to open are your eyes. you radiate beauty sav, it glows from within you inside and out.
Isolation sucks, everyday is another scoop out the bottom of the pit leading further down. My anxiety led me to not even having the capability to have a conversation, just always thinking about what the other person was thinking. After awhile I just gave up, on caring. I realized that, was the first thing I Could Do. But that only came after I had accomplished some things and felt that I was worthy of that demeanor. Accomplish things that make you feel worthy, and the anxiety, turns into a cloud and blows away.
Baby girl as soon as I clicked on this video I just wanted to reach through the screen and hug you. I know that feeling when I see it. You're really battling through it. I know cuz I'm going through it as well. I'm not just saying that either.. every waking moment is exhausting in some way shape or form.. I hope you find peace beautiful, as well as myself because girl... I feel you.
Where to start? I just found your video on my feed. I have found a few like this recently. All of them have arrived at the right moment for me. The phrase “silence is deafening” is so very real for me. The rawness of depression and anxiety shaking my body uncontrollably. Its like a waking nightmare. Being a human is hard. Being in a world that makes no sense is hard. On behalf of the tens of millions that feel just like you, Thank you for having the courage to make this video. I sincerely wish you many more breaths to come. Sometimes that’s all we can do is just breathe.
This was wonderful, appeared randomly but i really needed to hear this. I watched your newest video and i'm really glad it's been getting better. Happy holidays from North AL!
Also everything that you described is exactly what ive experienced, the struggle with the anxiety of dealing with people vs the loneliness and depression of being alone, its a desperate situation
Thanks for making this video. I have felt like isolating myself since childhood. Had this dream of running away and building a hut in the middle of nowhere, but at one point I tried to convince another kid to escape school with me. Maybe what I really want is different people to connect with. Autism sucks because socializing is so stressful, but still necessary. Especially after the pain of making my ex cry by being a stupid jerk, heartbreak, sketchy friends I struggled to cut ties with. I feel unworthy, it's hard to find new people. I have a weird fear of the sky and big open spaces that's started to get better. Exposure therapy helps if you don't overdo it. Maybe you can join some kind of sport? A yoga class, mountain biking, a hiking group, something. Exercise is really good for mental health, and it doesn't have to be too strenuous and unpleasant. And if you hike somewhere with a lot of trees, maybe it'd be more relaxing than walking through open fields and cliffs/mountain sides?
Hi Savannah, you hit the nail right on its head. I have had a period where I was around other people, but just doing my own thing for the most part. I spent so many evenings alone in my room. What you said about us needing a mirror is so very true especially when you feel like you don't know yourself (anymore). The barrier to seek out connection can be high, but like you said, everyone needs a tribe. Luckily, I think I finally found mine. People need to hear this more often, so if you feel complied to, please continue doing this! My hope is that you find what you seek. ^Daan
Quite often (but a lot less recently) I imagine moving away from everyone I know and isolating myself completely. I think that if I have access to nature for walking I would be fine and would rather not see other people while I walk. I would still communicate online but ideally would just get groceries delivered. I feel a dissatisfaction with my family and friends (very ungrateful I know) which I would say is caused by a mix of anxiety, paranoia, frustration, and my mental illness. What you say makes sense to me right now because I'm not feeling too bad and I can see that we evolved as social animals. Isolation is used as a form of torture. However, part of me still holds on to that notion of moving away and being on my own and not interacting with humans again unless I chose to without some sense of obligation because that is why I currently see friends and family. Obligation. I tell myself that I should enjoy it but I generally don't. But I would say that is negativity bias speaking tbh. Thanks for making this video which has made me rethink my wishes. I can't say you've convinced me and maybe there will always be a part of me that wants to abandon everything but at the very least I won't be doing it tomorrow :)
Hi Savannah, I'm writing my comment partway through your video but it connected with me. I've had a habit of avoiding discomfort which has led to spending a lot of time alone in my apartment. I had a bit of a breakthrough in why I do this, I'm hoping it's just a matter of putting in the work for changing habits. Learning the why is relieving though, since it makes me feel like I'm responding to a situation rather than there being something wrong with you. I hope you heal well because knowing yourself makes it easier to forgive yourself where you stumble and give yourself credit for hanging in there, even if it doesn't feel like much in the moment.
Thank you for making this. It's comforting in a way to see that other people are dealing with the same thing as me, and gives me hope that I WILL find people I connect with authentically (we all will !)
I sincerely wish the best of luck to you. Stay strong. You WILL make it through, and get better if you keep pushing forward, regardless of how hard it might get.
I am isolated too. I have social anxiety disorder and avoidant personality disorder. It is rough. We as humans are social animals and need to have friends, family intimate partners and community. I hope you recover fully from your mental health problems and create the connections that you need with the people that you need.
I wanted to stay and acknowledge that you are brave. Most people won't understand that simply recording this video can cause tremendous anxiety. It takes a lot of courage to face the fear. You are doing great! I would argue with the idea, that to know yourself, you need the other. The mirror reflects only the circumference, let’s call it “the cultural look”. Different environments would reflect different images, but the real answer to “Who am I?” is within and it is not conditioned by any external circumstances. But I’m not trying to argue that we need connections to be fulfilled (though I would say a connection with nature or art also counts). But there is a tiny but dramatic difference between real connection and trying to use the other to escape from one’s suffering. You are isolated from people and feel lonely. But there are billions of people who have “friends”, go to parties, talk, gossip and so on, but they still feel lonely and isolated even surrounded by people. And those people also have tremendous anxiety, some of which is the result of the fact, that they define their “selves” through the lens of others and do not know themselves. But again, I fully support your idea that we need connection in life (life is all about connections after all). I guess humanity just needs to understand what true connection really means. Maybe you could record something with your take on that point? What true connection means to you? In any way, I’m just ranting. My message is simple - you are very strong and brave! Keep going! Life loves courage!
I wish I was your neighbor, we could go on walks. I am isolated too, most after effect from abuse, and being autistic on top doesn't help. Sending hugs from Ohio
I just wanna say, first of all things do get better. Things seem hopeless and like you’ll never get out but as long as you make small changes, eventually you’ll look back and you’ll be on a completely different path. My first piece of advice would be to start small. If going outside scares you, maybe you could try sitting outside for a while. 20 minutes. Anything to get your brain to recognize that there is no immediate danger. Logically you know you are safe. Your Nervous System does not. It only wants to protect you. But to retrain it you must do what you fear. That’s unfortunately the only way to teach it that things aren’t so scary. Another thing I will say as someone who has dealt with isolation is that you have to celebrate the small victories. Rumination is the enemy of progress. Exposure therapy really does work. Progress may be slow, but just know that as long as you are trying, you are progressing. Stagnation is defeat. I know you will make it through this. The world is not as cruel as your brain tells you it is. Stay strong ❤
Wow. Thanks for sharing all of that! I’ve actually been working on the agoraphobia for a while and am able to go to town and stuff. I also sit outside almost everyday! Recently, I took my first long trip (5 hours) with my family that I’ve taken in 7 years. So, I’m actually doing well on that part. Now it’s just more of the social aspect and allowing others into my life, which will need the same approach that you’re talking about-exposure. It’s just very hard, but I know I’ll get there. Thanks again for your comment. That was a lot to type out lol and I appreciate it very much. 🤍
This video showed up randomly in my suggestions at reality-shattering timing. My brief story: Grew up bullied, isolated, grew up in the desert isolated all my life. No friend, no community, no one to talk to, and I even moved to the concrete jungle. 22 and I struggle with intense paranoia every time I leave the house to get groceries. I struggle with gauging the distance between my perception and the consensus reality which is driving me crazy. I've truly lost touch with reality if I've ever had it. I've been hard at work with therapy, Im doing IOP after having to leave my job because, well, it's retail and people are horrible. IOP is the closest I have to community and the only time I'm getting real, reciprocated contact with other humans, but the isolation has done so much damage to my brain I still struggle and feel separated. I have no idea what it's like to be normal. Satre's Hell Is Other People highlights the importance of people's interpretation of yourself and how that (or it's absence) inescapably shapes who you are. We need healthy sources of affirmation and we can't know ourselves without socializing (unfortunately people who disagree don't know isolation, most dont. They only know what it's like from the pandemic but even then they still text friends which they take for granted). Socializing during key years of brain development is so important otherwise you're bound to have mental illness. Isolation critically damages the immune and central nervous system. Im also with you on solitude in nature. Im even a nature lover but I'll still find that I'm talking to myself in the woods or beach to keep me sane. I wish I knew what to say, but since Im in the same place I dont know what to say to myself or where to go from here. But this video was like the first breath of fresh air I've had in months and I think it's given me the strength to get through this upcoming hard week. Thank you so much for being brave and offering such a sincere discussion, and I hope you keep updating us on this path.
hey i got recommended this video through listening to music of all things and i just want to say as much as i hate to admit it to myself (bc i am quite intolerant of many people's ignorance and blind hatred and arrogance, and maybe avoid easy connection with others for those reasons) i wholly relate to this video i just so badly want to meet more people that believe in the things i do but unfortunately many of the ones i see online or in real life do anything but that so i isolate myself from even most of the people i know and i hate to do that but in the past i always thought it was a necessity for me for self-preservation i'm now realizing as the years go on it's anything but and i'm severely hurting and it's affecting my mentality and my productivity in general it's not so much physical isolation or even a whole lot of lack of connection on the internet (if someone reaches out to me i'll likely respond as soon as i catch notice of it) it's the lack of motivation to put any effort forth to maintain relationships with those i don't know everything about and therefore am not so willing to fully trust as far as their intentions go right away and the issue is i understand how important not giving power or a space to those with harmful ideals is as far as self-protection goes but i've now lost the ability to let new people in as easy as i should and it's kept me trapped with isolating myself from the same people i violently disagree with i gladly needed to hear this kind of messaging y'know "get yourself out there" and "we need connection in order to exist" idk it's a balance i'll have to find with time and i should learn to become more open to new people as i see them bc maybe i've blocked a lot of great people out i shouldn't have in the past and i need to start leaving the window more open now i hope you continue to succeed in improving your life the same way i am trying for mine take care savannah and have a happy new year
I can relate. I’ve also been in a rut socially and suffer from anxiety and depression. You mentioned taking a class as a suggestion and that definitely helped me. I took a photography class and met some great people. I’m trying to focus on the small victories and be patient with myself. Best of luck with everything. You seem like an interesting and thoughtful person.
I isolate myself because people have hurt me so much, for almost the entirety of my life. I'm 21. Most memories i have is of being abused. And i also recognize as you say, that it's not healthy to self isolate. We are a social animal, we have social needs. Thank you for this video, you're motivating me to get in contact with people before this develops into a deeper wound. Take care of yourself, stay safe. :) (Subbed)
once you've been alone for a long long long time it becomes peaceful for me I've gotten used to being alone when im alone i can just be me i dont really need connection im stuck in a survival mind set i can only rely on myself i cant trust anyone that part i know is a lil unhealthy
Ive been almost totally isolated since i left school at 16. Had no friends since then, went to university but avoided any interaction with anyone else, have struggled even to talk to people. Isolation definitely takes its toll, I've pretty much been desperately lonely and depressed throughout that time, even worse than school which i hated, but at least i was around other people.
it definitely feels suffocating, especially if you dont find your home life connections dont fulfill you. be really careful when making friends again as you are in a very fragile state, i made the mistake of thinking anyone that is nice to me is my friend
I recognize the social anxiety/depression problem so much lol, spent large parts of my 20s isolated because of it. You’re so correct about relationships too. I think part of it is that people are so hooked on freedom as the ideal. A relationship is a type of bond and I think some people view every type of bond as a chain tying them down because being connected does restrict freedom in a way, and relationships can be very painful too. In reality though, relationships aren’t chains but roots. It’s a bond but it also gives nurishment and without them, both plants and people die. I’m sorry about your situation and nothing I write will help much but I just wanted to let you know I connected a lot with what you spoke about. Subscribed!
I’m 50. I have some of the same symptoms. You need to make sure your vitamin D levels are in the normal range. Look at allergies and anything that may be causing inflammation. Exercise is helpful. Antidepressants like Prozac and Lithium are powerful anti inflammatory drugs. The food we eat can also have a major effect. Psychology and Biology go hand in hand.
As an autistic guy it's so hard to not get into the spiral of isolating myself because of anxiety with being around other people and not knowing what to say, being awkward, not understood and sometimes not being able to communicate. I struggle to make friends and live in a small place
Ok so this is going to sound unhinged but I found great community that started 8 years ago in online women's spaces. Born female, I grew up and live with dysphoria, always felt "like a guy" or "othered" from women, but when I actually started interacting with them online (there's a small site where literally no men tread), I realized they felt the same way, too. I started making a conscious effort to talk more to women when I'm out, instead of the usual response of "I'm good, you?" I'll say "thank you for your kindness" or "I like your whatever". Somehow these things help, like I feel as if I have at least a tenuous grasp on reality now.
I have built walls -- a fortress, deep and mighty, that none may penetrate. I have no need of friendship, friendship causes pain; it's laughter and loving I disdain. I am a rock, I am an island.
I’m sorry you feel this way my friend. I think maybe it’s no so much that friendship in general causes pain, but definitely having the wrong people as friends causes pain. I don’t believe friendship in itself is the source. Sounds like maybe you have had experiences with people who aren’t the right match for you. And, honestly any relationship you have has the potential to cause pain, no matter how perfect it is. That was the whole point of me sharing this video, relationships of any kind require vulnerability and with vulnerability comes potential for you to be hurt. It’s an inevitable part of being human and relating with others. It’s sounds like you have been deeply hurt and for that I am sorry, but I hope that one day you can open your heart back up to people.
id like to think that you´ve separated yourself from bad people in your life too and now you can find and be arround people who love you love is god and the devil is fear
Hey Savannah, I'm not sure how I got to this video, but I watched the whole thing. I feel for what you are saying. We definitely need people. I'm with you. If you want to exchange emails, we can. Wishing you well.
Thank you for your comment and offering your email. I am feeling much better now as I’ve taken some action steps to help myself. Wishing you all the best as well. 🤍
@sizzledrizzle I have an iPhone 11. I don’t know if the quality looks bad to others or not, but it looks bad on my end when I watch it back. However, I also watched a video today that I know is good quality and filmed with studio cameras and the quality was the same. So, it might just be my settings on my phone or my internet connection.🤷🏻♀️
@@savannahmasters Hey! The quality of your camera is actually great! It is the lighting that is making it look bad. Buy a ring lamp to place in front of you while recording or try facing the natural light source to remove the shadows on you. It will make a night and day difference. Thank you for sharing this btw! It is good to find space to be alone and introspect, but we are such social creatures; never isolate for extended periods of time. My mental health has taken the piss this year too after a bad breakup. Depression/anxiety just builds upon the seemingly impossible task of breaking the isolation, like a spiral almost. Sending lots of love your way; we got this!
@@savannahmasters there is a right way or a wrong way. Isolation can be a religious/monastic way to divine whats within you, but you need tools of self awareness and a true desire, however tiny, to grow and change away from it as habit or cope. Sometimes being alone is safer than anything. It is an open path one can get lost in is all. Walk to the light, or crawl if you have to.
I’m not going diagnose you nor give you advice. You selflessly give viewers a cautionary story to not repeat your steps but yet you can fully identify you’re predicament with clarity.You may feel as though you are in a abyss but you do have self reflection(that’s huge),age & a natural beauty going for you. I will only add that solitary confinement is used in the correctional system for a reason,you’ve committed no crime so I hope you find the happiness you deserve & thank you for sharing
I love isolation and being alone. When your programming dies, you won't want to be around a bunch of people anymore. You will crave solitude and isolation. 🌗🪞🌓
From someone who struggles with crippling anxiety and is extremely avoidant, the last part of the vid helped alot. I have no friends, never been in a relationship, and i am in my mid 20's, the only thing that keeps me grounded is my family. I hope things get better for you.
i felt like i wrote that comment, i am sorry that you are going through this
There’s an old saying that goes…”no man is an island”, and it basically means none of us can, are or meant to exist without interacting with others. That’s what I like about RUclips, even though it’s not as organic as it used to be, it can still serve as a means to connect people to each other. And even if it isn’t “real life”, it is still real in terms of energy exchange. Especially while you’re still a smaller creator, you can build a lil community of people that are interested in what you have to say! Might even make a pal or two. In any case, life ebbs and flows…some days will be good, and some not, but you can get where you’re going.
One foot in front of the other.
I was nodding the whole way through. I’ve been isolated for over 2 years… no friends, family, etc. It’s soul destroying, maddening. Makes you think about death. Those who preach about individualism have never experienced extreme isolation or loneliness. You’re constantly in fight-or-flight desperately seeking connection, so there’s no way to self-actualise. Think Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. Thanks for being vulnerable, this was very relatable and helpful.
i fw that mirror analogy hella brahh. ive struggled w depression in the past and i only clicked on this video because the main reason i got depressed was because i isolated myself, pandemic also didnt help and it happened at the same time, i find it rly hard to socialize with anyone, unless they are extremely close to me or im on xans or i smoked a joint or sum i cant rly connect with strangers or family irl, i just started talking to my dad about shit and every single conversation we've had so far i cried like a river got connected to my eye sockets lmfao, because i havent been able to connect with him or anyone in my family so i decided to take the first step and its honestly the best thing ive ever done in my life.
i fucking love this video you seem hella sweet and smart ash just from watching you speak for 20 minutes lol, cheers 🙏
u are not alone, i’m in my last year of highschool after moving from my hometown two years ago to where i am now, then working 3 full time jobs while doing online school, eventually forcing me to go back in person for college although i know the detriment it puts my health in-and im absent more than half the week due to schizophrenia, depression, social anxiety, autism, and ive lost all of my friends, my boyfriend, i live alone in an old shed i renovated to be an apartment, and have little to no familial support; this being said, it doesn’t get easier. we just get stronger. i believe in you, when u wake up every morning, the first gifts you get to open are your eyes. you radiate beauty sav, it glows from within you inside and out.
Isolation sucks, everyday is another scoop out the bottom of the pit leading further down. My anxiety led me to not even having the capability to have a conversation, just always thinking about what the other person was thinking. After awhile I just gave up, on caring. I realized that, was the first thing I Could Do. But that only came after I had accomplished some things and felt that I was worthy of that demeanor. Accomplish things that make you feel worthy, and the anxiety, turns into a cloud and blows away.
Baby girl as soon as I clicked on this video I just wanted to reach through the screen and hug you. I know that feeling when I see it. You're really battling through it. I know cuz I'm going through it as well. I'm not just saying that either.. every waking moment is exhausting in some way shape or form.. I hope you find peace beautiful, as well as myself because girl... I feel you.
Where to start? I just found your video on my feed. I have found a few like this recently. All of them have arrived at the right moment for me. The phrase “silence is deafening” is so very real for me. The rawness of depression and anxiety shaking my body uncontrollably. Its like a waking nightmare.
Being a human is hard. Being in a world that makes no sense is hard.
On behalf of the tens of millions that feel just like you, Thank you for having the courage to make this video. I sincerely wish you many more breaths to come.
Sometimes that’s all we can do is just breathe.
This was wonderful, appeared randomly but i really needed to hear this. I watched your newest video and i'm really glad it's been getting better. Happy holidays from North AL!
Also everything that you described is exactly what ive experienced, the struggle with the anxiety of dealing with people vs the loneliness and depression of being alone, its a desperate situation
I’m sorry to hear about your struggles. You are not alone in them. Wishing you well.🤍
Thanks for making this video. I have felt like isolating myself since childhood. Had this dream of running away and building a hut in the middle of nowhere, but at one point I tried to convince another kid to escape school with me. Maybe what I really want is different people to connect with.
Autism sucks because socializing is so stressful, but still necessary. Especially after the pain of making my ex cry by being a stupid jerk, heartbreak, sketchy friends I struggled to cut ties with. I feel unworthy, it's hard to find new people.
I have a weird fear of the sky and big open spaces that's started to get better. Exposure therapy helps if you don't overdo it.
Maybe you can join some kind of sport? A yoga class, mountain biking, a hiking group, something. Exercise is really good for mental health, and it doesn't have to be too strenuous and unpleasant. And if you hike somewhere with a lot of trees, maybe it'd be more relaxing than walking through open fields and cliffs/mountain sides?
Hi Savannah, you hit the nail right on its head. I have had a period where I was around other people, but just doing my own thing for the most part. I spent so many evenings alone in my room. What you said about us needing a mirror is so very true especially when you feel like you don't know yourself (anymore). The barrier to seek out connection can be high, but like you said, everyone needs a tribe. Luckily, I think I finally found mine.
People need to hear this more often, so if you feel complied to, please continue doing this! My hope is that you find what you seek.
^Daan
Thank you so much for sharing and for the encouragement! 🤍
Quite often (but a lot less recently) I imagine moving away from everyone I know and isolating myself completely. I think that if I have access to nature for walking I would be fine and would rather not see other people while I walk. I would still communicate online but ideally would just get groceries delivered. I feel a dissatisfaction with my family and friends (very ungrateful I know) which I would say is caused by a mix of anxiety, paranoia, frustration, and my mental illness.
What you say makes sense to me right now because I'm not feeling too bad and I can see that we evolved as social animals. Isolation is used as a form of torture. However, part of me still holds on to that notion of moving away and being on my own and not interacting with humans again unless I chose to without some sense of obligation because that is why I currently see friends and family. Obligation. I tell myself that I should enjoy it but I generally don't. But I would say that is negativity bias speaking tbh.
Thanks for making this video which has made me rethink my wishes. I can't say you've convinced me and maybe there will always be a part of me that wants to abandon everything but at the very least I won't be doing it tomorrow :)
Hi Savannah, I'm writing my comment partway through your video but it connected with me. I've had a habit of avoiding discomfort which has led to spending a lot of time alone in my apartment. I had a bit of a breakthrough in why I do this, I'm hoping it's just a matter of putting in the work for changing habits. Learning the why is relieving though, since it makes me feel like I'm responding to a situation rather than there being something wrong with you. I hope you heal well because knowing yourself makes it easier to forgive yourself where you stumble and give yourself credit for hanging in there, even if it doesn't feel like much in the moment.
Thank you for making this. It's comforting in a way to see that other people are dealing with the same thing as me, and gives me hope that I WILL find people I connect with authentically (we all will !)
I sincerely wish the best of luck to you. Stay strong. You WILL make it through, and get better if you keep pushing forward, regardless of how hard it might get.
I can relate I’ve been working on this lately great vid
Thanks for watching! 😊
Thank you for posting this video. It really spoke to me
🤍🤍🤍
I am isolated too. I have social anxiety disorder and avoidant personality disorder. It is rough. We as humans are social animals and need to have friends, family intimate partners and community. I hope you recover fully from your mental health problems and create the connections that you need with the people that you need.
Thank you so much for sharing this. Sending love to you.🤍
I wanted to stay and acknowledge that you are brave. Most people won't understand that simply recording this video can cause tremendous anxiety. It takes a lot of courage to face the fear. You are doing great!
I would argue with the idea, that to know yourself, you need the other. The mirror reflects only the circumference, let’s call it “the cultural look”. Different environments would reflect different images, but the real answer to “Who am I?” is within and it is not conditioned by any external circumstances. But I’m not trying to argue that we need connections to be fulfilled (though I would say a connection with nature or art also counts). But there is a tiny but dramatic difference between real connection and trying to use the other to escape from one’s suffering. You are isolated from people and feel lonely. But there are billions of people who have “friends”, go to parties, talk, gossip and so on, but they still feel lonely and isolated even surrounded by people. And those people also have tremendous anxiety, some of which is the result of the fact, that they define their “selves” through the lens of others and do not know themselves. But again, I fully support your idea that we need connection in life (life is all about connections after all). I guess humanity just needs to understand what true connection really means. Maybe you could record something with your take on that point? What true connection means to you?
In any way, I’m just ranting. My message is simple - you are very strong and brave! Keep going! Life loves courage!
I wish I was your neighbor, we could go on walks. I am isolated too, most after effect from abuse, and being autistic on top doesn't help. Sending hugs from Ohio
I just wanna say, first of all things do get better. Things seem hopeless and like you’ll never get out but as long as you make small changes, eventually you’ll look back and you’ll be on a completely different path. My first piece of advice would be to start small. If going outside scares you, maybe you could try sitting outside for a while. 20 minutes. Anything to get your brain to recognize that there is no immediate danger. Logically you know you are safe. Your Nervous System does not. It only wants to protect you. But to retrain it you must do what you fear. That’s unfortunately the only way to teach it that things aren’t so scary. Another thing I will say as someone who has dealt with isolation is that you have to celebrate the small victories. Rumination is the enemy of progress. Exposure therapy really does work. Progress may be slow, but just know that as long as you are trying, you are progressing. Stagnation is defeat. I know you will make it through this. The world is not as cruel as your brain tells you it is. Stay strong ❤
Wow. Thanks for sharing all of that! I’ve actually been working on the agoraphobia for a while and am able to go to town and stuff. I also sit outside almost everyday! Recently, I took my first long trip (5 hours) with my family that I’ve taken in 7 years. So, I’m actually doing well on that part. Now it’s just more of the social aspect and allowing others into my life, which will need the same approach that you’re talking about-exposure. It’s just very hard, but I know I’ll get there. Thanks again for your comment. That was a lot to type out lol and I appreciate it very much. 🤍
This video showed up randomly in my suggestions at reality-shattering timing. My brief story: Grew up bullied, isolated, grew up in the desert isolated all my life. No friend, no community, no one to talk to, and I even moved to the concrete jungle. 22 and I struggle with intense paranoia every time I leave the house to get groceries. I struggle with gauging the distance between my perception and the consensus reality which is driving me crazy. I've truly lost touch with reality if I've ever had it.
I've been hard at work with therapy, Im doing IOP after having to leave my job because, well, it's retail and people are horrible. IOP is the closest I have to community and the only time I'm getting real, reciprocated contact with other humans, but the isolation has done so much damage to my brain I still struggle and feel separated. I have no idea what it's like to be normal.
Satre's Hell Is Other People highlights the importance of people's interpretation of yourself and how that (or it's absence) inescapably shapes who you are. We need healthy sources of affirmation and we can't know ourselves without socializing (unfortunately people who disagree don't know isolation, most dont. They only know what it's like from the pandemic but even then they still text friends which they take for granted). Socializing during key years of brain development is so important otherwise you're bound to have mental illness. Isolation critically damages the immune and central nervous system.
Im also with you on solitude in nature. Im even a nature lover but I'll still find that I'm talking to myself in the woods or beach to keep me sane.
I wish I knew what to say, but since Im in the same place I dont know what to say to myself or where to go from here. But this video was like the first breath of fresh air I've had in months and I think it's given me the strength to get through this upcoming hard week. Thank you so much for being brave and offering such a sincere discussion, and I hope you keep updating us on this path.
Thank you so much for this video.
hey i got recommended this video through listening to music of all things and i just want to say as much as i hate to admit it to myself (bc i am quite intolerant of many people's ignorance and blind hatred and arrogance, and maybe avoid easy connection with others for those reasons) i wholly relate to this video
i just so badly want to meet more people that believe in the things i do but unfortunately many of the ones i see online or in real life do anything but that
so i isolate myself from even most of the people i know
and i hate to do that but in the past i always thought it was a necessity for me for self-preservation
i'm now realizing as the years go on it's anything but and i'm severely hurting and it's affecting my mentality and my productivity in general
it's not so much physical isolation or even a whole lot of lack of connection on the internet (if someone reaches out to me i'll likely respond as soon as i catch notice of it)
it's the lack of motivation to put any effort forth to maintain relationships with those i don't know everything about and therefore am not so willing to fully trust as far as their intentions go right away
and the issue is i understand how important not giving power or a space to those with harmful ideals is as far as self-protection goes
but i've now lost the ability to let new people in as easy as i should and it's kept me trapped with isolating myself from the same people i violently disagree with
i gladly needed to hear this kind of messaging
y'know
"get yourself out there" and "we need connection in order to exist"
idk it's a balance i'll have to find with time and i should learn to become more open to new people as i see them bc maybe i've blocked a lot of great people out i shouldn't have in the past and i need to start leaving the window more open now
i hope you continue to succeed in improving your life the same way i am trying for mine
take care savannah and have a happy new year
I can relate. I’ve also been in a rut socially and suffer from anxiety and depression. You mentioned taking a class as a suggestion and that definitely helped me. I took a photography class and met some great people. I’m trying to focus on the small victories and be patient with myself. Best of luck with everything. You seem like an interesting and thoughtful person.
Thanks so much for sharing and for the encouragement!
I isolate myself because people have hurt me so much, for almost the entirety of my life. I'm 21. Most memories i have is of being abused.
And i also recognize as you say, that it's not healthy to self isolate. We are a social animal, we have social needs.
Thank you for this video, you're motivating me to get in contact with people before this develops into a deeper wound.
Take care of yourself, stay safe. :) (Subbed)
once you've been alone for a long long long time it becomes peaceful for me I've gotten used to being alone when im alone i can just be me i dont really need connection im stuck in a survival mind set i can only rely on myself i cant trust anyone that part i know is a lil unhealthy
Ive been almost totally isolated since i left school at 16. Had no friends since then, went to university but avoided any interaction with anyone else, have struggled even to talk to people. Isolation definitely takes its toll, I've pretty much been desperately lonely and depressed throughout that time, even worse than school which i hated, but at least i was around other people.
I understand you 100 percent!
You are spot on with other people acting as a mirror. I'm isolated, too, a stay-at-home mom living in the woods. I get you.
I absolutely feel the same. Even to the point of understanding people as mirrors. It’s hard trying to find people that understand and are awakened.
it definitely feels suffocating, especially if you dont find your home life connections dont fulfill you. be really careful when making friends again as you are in a very fragile state, i made the mistake of thinking anyone that is nice to me is my friend
I recognize the social anxiety/depression problem so much lol, spent large parts of my 20s isolated because of it. You’re so correct about relationships too.
I think part of it is that people are so hooked on freedom as the ideal. A relationship is a type of bond and I think some people view every type of bond as a chain tying them down because being connected does restrict freedom in a way, and relationships can be very painful too. In reality though, relationships aren’t chains but roots. It’s a bond but it also gives nurishment and without them, both plants and people die.
I’m sorry about your situation and nothing I write will help much but I just wanted to let you know I connected a lot with what you spoke about. Subscribed!
Yes! There is a big fixation on hyperindependence and going through everything alone. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and for the support!
I’m 50. I have some of the same symptoms. You need to make sure your vitamin D levels are in the normal range. Look at allergies and anything that may be causing inflammation. Exercise is helpful. Antidepressants like Prozac and Lithium are powerful anti inflammatory drugs. The food we eat can also have a major effect. Psychology and Biology go hand in hand.
You are super amazing and super beautiful, and I love the sound of your voice!!!!! I hope you are having an amazing day!!!!
Aw, thank you so much! You are too kind! 💖
I've lived in isolation since my teens and it's nice for it's own reasons but it's okay to take breaks.
Its a volatile situation. We feel better some days but it never heals.
Ty for this video
As an autistic guy it's so hard to not get into the spiral of isolating myself because of anxiety with being around other people and not knowing what to say, being awkward, not understood and sometimes not being able to communicate. I struggle to make friends and live in a small place
I have the same .. try to get a pet to start with. I am isolated, too. You speak very wisely ... you just need company and I think this will help
Thank you for the suggestion! I was actually thinking the same thing about needing a pet. I’m currently looking at bunnies or maybe a dog.
Ok so this is going to sound unhinged but I found great community that started 8 years ago in online women's spaces. Born female, I grew up and live with dysphoria, always felt "like a guy" or "othered" from women, but when I actually started interacting with them online (there's a small site where literally no men tread), I realized they felt the same way, too. I started making a conscious effort to talk more to women when I'm out, instead of the usual response of "I'm good, you?" I'll say "thank you for your kindness" or "I like your whatever". Somehow these things help, like I feel as if I have at least a tenuous grasp on reality now.
Thanks Savannah for your vulnerability.
I have built walls -- a fortress, deep and mighty, that none may penetrate. I have no need of friendship, friendship causes pain; it's laughter and loving I disdain. I am a rock, I am an island.
I’m sorry you feel this way my friend. I think maybe it’s no so much that friendship in general causes pain, but definitely having the wrong people as friends causes pain. I don’t believe friendship in itself is the source. Sounds like maybe you have had experiences with people who aren’t the right match for you. And, honestly any relationship you have has the potential to cause pain, no matter how perfect it is. That was the whole point of me sharing this video, relationships of any kind require vulnerability and with vulnerability comes potential for you to be hurt. It’s an inevitable part of being human and relating with others. It’s sounds like you have been deeply hurt and for that I am sorry, but I hope that one day you can open your heart back up to people.
id like to think that you´ve separated yourself from bad people in your life too and now you can find and be arround people who love you
love is god and the devil is fear
Hey Savannah, I'm not sure how I got to this video, but I watched the whole thing. I feel for what you are saying. We definitely need people. I'm with you. If you want to exchange emails, we can. Wishing you well.
Thank you for your comment and offering your email. I am feeling much better now as I’ve taken some action steps to help myself. Wishing you all the best as well. 🤍
@@savannahmasters That's great to hear.
My problems arent a problem if Im alone
But then being alone is a problem
Why is the quality so fucking bad? Does someone know how to make the quality better on iPhone?
What iphone do you have?
@sizzledrizzle I have an iPhone 11. I don’t know if the quality looks bad to others or not, but it looks bad on my end when I watch it back. However, I also watched a video today that I know is good quality and filmed with studio cameras and the quality was the same. So, it might just be my settings on my phone or my internet connection.🤷🏻♀️
@@savannahmasters maybe but I would mess around with the settings more and try different lenses if possible. I followed you on IG btw
Looks perfectly normal and fine to me?? ❤❤ Your cuter
@@savannahmasters Hey! The quality of your camera is actually great! It is the lighting that is making it look bad. Buy a ring lamp to place in front of you while recording or try facing the natural light source to remove the shadows on you. It will make a night and day difference.
Thank you for sharing this btw! It is good to find space to be alone and introspect, but we are such social creatures; never isolate for extended periods of time. My mental health has taken the piss this year too after a bad breakup. Depression/anxiety just builds upon the seemingly impossible task of breaking the isolation, like a spiral almost. Sending lots of love your way; we got this!
Isolation is ruining your mental health
Yes, this is kind of obvious lol. 😂
@@savannahmasters there is a right way or a wrong way. Isolation can be a religious/monastic way to divine whats within you, but you need tools of self awareness and a true desire, however tiny, to grow and change away from it as habit or cope.
Sometimes being alone is safer than anything. It is an open path one can get lost in is all. Walk to the light, or crawl if you have to.
Savannah, I think the fact that you think others reflects you as a mirror is not really accurate and may be being harmful...i root for you, take care.
I’m not going diagnose you nor give you advice. You selflessly give viewers a cautionary story to not repeat your steps but yet you can fully identify you’re predicament with clarity.You may feel as though you are in a abyss but you do have self reflection(that’s huge),age & a natural beauty going for you. I will only add that solitary confinement is used in the correctional system for a reason,you’ve committed no crime so I hope you find the happiness you deserve & thank you for sharing
I love isolation and being alone. When your programming dies, you won't want to be around a bunch of people anymore. You will crave solitude and isolation.
🌗🪞🌓