How to deal with loneliness with Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche
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- Опубликовано: 25 авг 2024
- Speaking from personal experience during his four-and-a-half-year wandering retreat, Mingyur Rinpoche teaches us how to work with a sense of loneliness. Most importantly, he invites us to appreciate friends both near and far, extrinsic and intrinsic - as well as the very solitude itself.
This teaching is from Tergar’s Joy of Living online program. To learn more, click joy.tergar.org.
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I sometimes feel lonely, but not when I’m alone. It’s when I’m with other people but am not feeling the genuine connection that I desire. I wish joyfulness to all beings 🙏
Maybe because you are stuck in the idea no one understands me. If you try to understand yourself enough, communicate sincerely with yourself by writing you will find what he call above "your consciousness become your refuge".
Others aren't here to understand you in fact but they are the mirror to reflect what you don't see again within.
Namaste 🙏🏻
Same, but more from a feeling of suspicion and mistrust as our economic system encourages and rewards a slow crushing of one another, and any feeling of kinship or solidarity has been eroded. It is as though we shouldn't help others in need, but watch them wither so we might rifle through their pockets when they finally collapse. Material wealth has burned every other feeling down to ash in sacrifice to its false gods and fetishised idols. All I'm left with is a numbness inside where human connection used to be.
Yes! I find superficial engagements often leave me more hollow and drained than, if I was to stay at home and enjoy my own company.
I do get a bit sad I dont have the social life that others can enjoy but, I have learned to enjoy what I have and the few friends I know I can turn to when needed.
Many blessings to you.
@@oscartravis5740 ...yeah, I guess it's good to notice what's going on, and there's Also...Life doing its magic....I gotta stay open to that....and watch my view expand...the horizon is endless...loads of room for lovely changes...we are Not confined to Anyone's rules 🌞🌟🌞🌟🌞🌟🧡
Relatable! And then I feel what's wrong with me? And feel so down for days.
I really needed this after being rejected today. Thank you 🙏
How is it going my man 🖤🕉️
How it now?
I think about her from time to time but I'm sure I'll find someone like her one day
@@memelord5366 how old r u? The older u get the smaller those relationship rejection get. U gonna be fine
Hopefully Master Rinpoche ever reads this.... You have saved my life. Thank you for your teachings and sharing your wisdom to all of us!
❤
He said "mountain out of molehill" in the most asian way I can even imagine.
Love this guy.
My husband died very suddenly in april. I have come to see loneliness as a test of my endurance and an opportunity to define myself again after 27 years being so close to someone else. I cry and miss him every day but I chose to hope for a beautiful life despite everything.
I u OK⁹hi 9th I u
Hugging you ❤ You are always together in your hearts!
How have you been holding up? Any tips for dealing with loneliness?
Reflect on that. Be grateful that you had all that. Some of us do not have anything at all. We can all practice gratitude. I am grateful I am strong to endure a life alone. Like that. Life is a constant journey of self improvement and becoming aware.
I know ur pain.
Thank u to the whole Buddhist community for all your support . Love all of u and wish u all peace and joy in your life’s . Buddhism has really helped me throughout my life .
How r u feeling now?
I love my solitude and sometimes its a fight to have a chance to just be in my own company. My struggle is not actually loneliness but with approval. If I'm alone, I can't be disapproved and I am free to approve myself. But when I'm with people I have the chance to receive approval or disapproval and that often creates for me a lot of stress and a whole lot of disappointment. I realized that while watching this video so now I know what to work on. Thank you for the perspective!
Хорошо сказано 👍
I love to walk alone far away from people. However I am not alone !
I sit by the running stream and listen to the water flow , think about how inportant water is.
Then when the wind blows I feel the wind ,it's power !
The smell of the grass or the land I am on. I think about the small animals I see when walking and think about how they fit in to the world !!
Nature is wonderful ,all powerfull . Sometimes kind , sometimes not ..
Kyabsuche 🙏🙏🙏 Rinpoche chog❤️🙏
You admire Rinpoche. Same here. Please allow me to interrupt. I do research on how Buddhism disappeared in Bihar. I realized it never disappeared from Bihar. Buddhists simply failed to research Indian Buddhism. They looked at Buddhism through the sphere of their own cultures searching for only the Buddha. Buddha had a myriad of names in different villages according to his teachings there. Example. His favorite teaching was 'Lust and desire causes pain. Remove lust and desire, and pain is removed'. Translated into Bihari (where the Buddha story took place) it is DHUKH HARAN meaning to remove dukha. Three dozen villages pray to DUKH HARAN Baba. Its clear that DUKH HARAN Baba is none other than the Buddha. Problem is Buddhists are searching only for the Buddha. In the real Vaishali the Buddha begged for alms. The locals there pray to 'BHIKHAINI' Baba (Beggar Baba). Bhikhaini was mispronounced by Buddhists as Bhikshu. Who is BHIKHAINI Baba. The Buddha no doubt. But people are searching for a man called Buddha. In the real Vaishali, in Beluha the Buddha suffered a sickness and felt he had grown old. The locals pray to 'BURHA' Baba (Old Baba). Who is BURHA Baba. The Buddha no doubt. In the real Vaishali the Lichavies pressurized Buddha not to die. They trailed him to Bandagawan pressurizing him not to die. To put pressure in Hindi is DABESHWAR. Three dozen villages around the stupa where Buddha gave the Lichavies his patra, the villagers pray to Baba 'DABESHWAR NATH' meaning the man who won the pressurizing game. It was the the Buddha no doubt as he gave the Lichavies his patra and succeded in sending them back. But Buddhists are searching for the Buddha. In Pidhauli (Vaishali) the local deity is Bardiha Baba. Bardiha means the Baba who didn't allow us to stay where he was staying. Bardiha Baba is the Buddha no doubt because he didn't allow the crowd of Lichavies to stay with him in Bandagama. Forgive me for commenting out of the topic. I just wanted to impart this information to Buddhists. Thanks.
WOW talk about perfect timing, i could use this talk right now, i was feeling very alone, but this helped alot.
This has come just when it needed to, been struggling with a lot and this really helped, thank you 🙏
like ur smile in between.lots of regards
I also like his smile and simple way of preaching. Please allow me to interrupt. I do research on how Buddhism disappeared in Bihar. I realized it never disappeared from Bihar. Buddhists simply failed to research Indian Buddhism. They looked at Buddhism through the sphere of their own cultures searching for only the Buddha. Buddha had a myriad of names in different villages according to his teachings there. Example. His favorite teaching was 'Lust and desire causes pain. Remove lust and desire, and pain is removed'. Translated into Bihari (where the Buddha story took place) it is DHUKH HARAN meaning to remove dukha. Three dozen villages pray to DUKH HARAN Baba. Its clear that DUKH HARAN Baba is none other than the Buddha. Problem is Buddhists are searching only for the Buddha. In the real Vaishali the Buddha begged for alms. The locals there pray to 'BHIKHAINI' Baba (Beggar Baba). Bhikhaini was mispronounced by Buddhists as Bhikshu. Who is BHIKHAINI Baba. The Buddha no doubt. But people are searching for a man called Buddha. In the real Vaishali, in Beluha the Buddha suffered a sickness and felt he had grown old. The locals pray to 'BURHA' Baba (Old Baba). Who is BURHA Baba. The Buddha no doubt. In the real Vaishali the Lichavies pressurized Buddha not to die. They trailed him to Bandagawan pressurizing him not to die. To put pressure in Hindi is DABESHWAR. Three dozen villages around the stupa where Buddha gave the Lichavies his patra, the villagers pray to Baba 'DABESHWAR NATH' meaning the man who won the pressurizing game. It was the the Buddha no doubt as he gave the Lichavies his patra and succeded in sending them back. But Buddhists are searching for the Buddha. In Pidhauli (Vaishali) the local deity is Bardiha Baba. Bardiha means the Baba who didn't allow us to stay where he was staying. Bardiha Baba is the Buddha no doubt because he didn't allow the crowd of Lichavies to stay with him in Bandagama. Forgive me for commenting out of the topic. I just wanted to impart this information to Buddhists. Thanks.
Your teaching have, over time, changed me I. So many positive ways ... It's been incredible... So keep up the good work and I like forward to your next teachings. Bye Stuart 😊
I really relate to what u say about feeling connected to ur path. I pursue art as a career and that means being solitary for large periods of time where it's just me and the page I'm drawing on and the subject I draw. The skills I gain are with me for the remainder of my life wherever I go
I love drawing in groups, with music 😁🌈or yeah, alone in a big city, but then that illusion disappears and inner-sight kicks in, people come and chat if I'm open to that friendly connection💫 and also alone in peaceful places, so I can bring thAt into wherever I go, too, it's a fascinating journey, isn't it! 🎉I trust this generation feels free to express themselves freely, safely and in turn, tune into their own inner senses, and souls heritage, authentically, with no more conditioning or constraints, to create the inspiration we love to thrive on for future Joyfilled communities everywhere, rock on🎉🌈🎨
谢谢仁波切如此全面的分享，能在一周结束之前听到上师如此智慧的开示，让我现在就要做感恩的实践！
thank you Rinpoche,
I have not had a friend since high school. I think most of my friends happened due to that forced socialisation, being at the back of the classroom same group of guys day in day out, bound to be at least one dude to get on with. But ever since working it’s not the same, sure you work with the same colleges every day, but it’s work, miserable and drab, people are really only their for the pay check, it’s less about making friend and more about just getting through the day. I do sometimes worry I may never have a friend again, I am friendly with people but just don’t have the time to form a real connection with another person. Doesn’t help I don’t drink, do drugs or use social media.. so in many ways that isolates me from my generation.
Can try and be nice to strangers help them
Thank you for this. Much of life is walking the path alone. Being alone and being lonely are different concepts. Enjoy the journey.
Thank you so much sir and thank you God for bringing me here, I have all that I need walk my path... God bless us all with his presence as our soul and may all of walk our path in love and harmony with the creator... 🙏🏽🌞
Beautiful. Thank you very much Yongey Mingyur
My heart bleeding, my body shaking and crying when I listen to this teaching. Feeling guilty as my mind creates this speechless isolation in loneliness, which I can fully feel that it is myself creating this type of life threatening reality. Full of shame that I am not able to reach out or connect. Not to a person. Not to a concept such as compassion, love, awareness, wisdom. This is only a word, written in books. Only a sound coming out of the computer speaker. Nothing that would be there for me to be felt or experienced. Traumatic breakdown, dissociation, disassembly of my very being, there is nobody left, no I, no Me, no part of my being that would be capable to feel anything or reach out to anybody or anything. Remembering previous breakdowns, after having reached out to people being rejected by those people who tell me I should please understand that my reactions are too much for them. Stunned. I should please not contact them any more. They send me a link to a YoutTube video and wish me well as they end the friendship. My reactions are too much for me as well. Overwhelmed. Suicidal thoughts, feeling close to those who took their lives, lonely...
Loneliness is not what we tend to think it is. Instead, it is much deeper than that. What is loneliness, then?
Are we lonely? Or are we ourselves the loneliness? Is loneliness different from what we really are, consciousness/awareness?
Now from surface level, what we usually call loneliness is our mind is scared of losing its existence; that's why it always wants to be occupied by one thing or the other. If it doesn't happen, it gets scared and craves for it, causing loneliness.
. I love his videos. Please allow me to interrupt. I do research on how Buddhism disappeared in Bihar. I realized it never disappeared from Bihar. Buddhists simply failed to research Indian Buddhism. They looked at Buddhism through the sphere of their own cultures searching for only the Buddha. Buddha had a myriad of names in different villages according to his teachings there. Example. His favorite teaching was 'Lust and desire causes pain. Remove lust and desire, and pain is removed'. Translated into Bihari (where the Buddha story took place) it is DHUKH HARAN meaning to remove dukha. Three dozen villages pray to DUKH HARAN Baba. Its clear that DUKH HARAN Baba is none other than the Buddha. Problem is Buddhists are searching only for the Buddha. In the real Vaishali the Buddha begged for alms. The locals there pray to 'BHIKHAINI' Baba (Beggar Baba). Bhikhaini was mispronounced by Buddhists as Bhikshu. Who is BHIKHAINI Baba. The Buddha no doubt. But people are searching for a man called Buddha. In the real Vaishali, in Beluha the Buddha suffered a sickness and felt he had grown old. The locals pray to 'BURHA' Baba (Old Baba). Who is BURHA Baba. The Buddha no doubt. In the real Vaishali the Lichavies pressurized Buddha not to die. They trailed him to Bandagawan pressurizing him not to die. To put pressure in Hindi is DABESHWAR. Three dozen villages around the stupa where Buddha gave the Lichavies his patra, the villagers pray to Baba 'DABESHWAR NATH' meaning the man who won the pressurizing game. It was the the Buddha no doubt as he gave the Lichavies his patra and succeded in sending them back. But Buddhists are searching for the Buddha. In Pidhauli (Vaishali) the local deity is Bardiha Baba. Bardiha means the Baba who didn't allow us to stay where he was staying. Bardiha Baba is the Buddha no doubt because he didn't allow the crowd of Lichavies to stay with him in Bandagama. Forgive me for commenting out of the topic. I just wanted to impart this information to Buddhists.
Have a great day my friend, this was another great piece of wisdom🌞
💖at the best time for me🙏🙏🙏
When the primary nature is realized, "loneliness" is no longer experienced. It is dissolved and revealed to have never existed in the first place by experiencing the inseparability of all consciousness. Motivation to practice. .:)
Namo Buddhaya, 🙏🙏🙏
Thank you my friend I appreciate you. 🙏
❤️🤗Beautiful 🎉🎁🌻thank you dear Rinpoche and lovely greetings from Germany 🏵️🌼
Its amazing how much I can learn just with one of your videos. Please always be safe and healthy
You do not know how much you have helped keep me sane since I found your chanell
ALL IS THINKING AGAIN WHAT YOU SAID AND RELATE.
Thank you 🤗🙏🌷✨✨✨
Great advice from a very pure mind 🙏
Thank you, Rinpoche, appreciation and gratitude help me a lot but of course sometimes I forget. Your reminder was very timely today though I feel depressed rather than lonely. I think this will help both though.
I'm 21 years old i would like to say thank you to you master i can deal now my loneliness because i'm all alone because my father died and my brother have an own life and my mother was on the other guy.
Thank you friend. I appreciate it. This video is very helpful. Namaste
The practice described by Yongey works « to appreciate something everyday, and to change the thing that is appreciated everyday »
I have no doubt about it for you working too.
You have a big heart and a great mind !
It's very helpful, thank you Rinpoche.
Some people do not feel lonely, and retreat for the rest of their life, like the wholy brother Klaus in Switzerland, because the wholy teachings where his best friend.
Hey Friends, I know that feeling lonely can be tough. But remember that you're never truly alone. Reach out to friends and family, or try joining a club or group that interests you. Volunteering or doing something kind for others can also help boost your mood and connect you with new people. Take time for self-care, too. Do things you enjoy and focus on your own well-being. You're a valuable and amazing person, and you deserve to feel loved and supported.
Feeling lonely can definitely be tough. Please allow me to interrupt. I do research on how Buddhism disappeared in Bihar. I realized it never disappeared from Bihar. Buddhists simply failed to research Indian Buddhism. They looked at Buddhism through the sphere of their own cultures searching for only the Buddha. Buddha had a myriad of names in different villages according to his teachings there. Example. His favorite teaching was 'Lust and desire causes pain. Remove lust and desire, and pain is removed'. Translated into Bihari (where the Buddha story took place) it is DHUKH HARAN meaning to remove dukha. Three dozen villages pray to DUKH HARAN Baba. Its clear that DUKH HARAN Baba is none other than the Buddha. Problem is Buddhists are searching only for the Buddha. In the real Vaishali the Buddha begged for alms. The locals there pray to 'BHIKHAINI' Baba (Beggar Baba). Bhikhaini was mispronounced by Buddhists as Bhikshu. Who is BHIKHAINI Baba. The Buddha no doubt. But people are searching for a man called Buddha. In the real Vaishali, in Beluha the Buddha suffered a sickness and felt he had grown old. The locals pray to 'BURHA' Baba (Old Baba). Who is BURHA Baba. The Buddha no doubt. In the real Vaishali the Lichavies pressurized Buddha not to die. They trailed him to Bandagawan pressurizing him not to die. To put pressure in Hindi is DABESHWAR. Three dozen villages around the stupa where Buddha gave the Lichavies his patra, the villagers pray to Baba 'DABESHWAR NATH' meaning the man who won the pressurizing game. It was the the Buddha no doubt as he gave the Lichavies his patra and succeded in sending them back. But Buddhists are searching for the Buddha. In Pidhauli (Vaishali) the local deity is Bardiha Baba. Bardiha means the Baba who didn't allow us to stay where he was staying. Bardiha Baba is the Buddha no doubt because he didn't allow the crowd of Lichavies to stay with him in Bandagama. Forgive me for commenting out of the topic. I just wanted to impart this information to Buddhists.
Thank you! 🙏🏼❤️
Learn that you connect outward to all things... then draw your real power in and to your brain and let it build. create your thoughts that make you smile. create the Quantum wave.
Thank you for this Guruji. I was going through exactly what you explained, your guidance means a lot.
Please put out more videos, more frequently on such topics.. thanks.
So great advice and thank you so much.
Thank you, Guru.
As a grown kid with an attachment trauma I struggle a lot with a sense of loneliness and get caught into “zoomed in” state very often. Reminder that it is just a mind play helps not to surrender to this feeling completely
i felt this
i felt you
Only your soul can give you the close connection you desire. No one else will see or feel exactly what you do. 🙂 compassion for you, friend.
Love , compassion, wisdom, awareness❤
Good reminder. Thanks 🙂🙏
Thank You.
This guy knows , bless you brother❤
He is true 😊..amazing 😍...
Love.
Thank you!
Thankyou for the help
thank you ❤
I think to combat loneliness we have to love ourselves very much, pamper ourselves and embrace and accept every part deeply. Only then u can heal.
Is it my love and compassion that's my best friend? Or is it the Love and Compassion of the All? 🧡
You are never alone because you are always there.
Honestly i wouldn't give my solitude for anything it's Soo peaceful and blissful. 🙂
@Solace Creat you can by pass a lot of it with technology now listening to podcasts for example. Don't You think? I think it is possible and i legitimately believe i have developed genetic mutations or brain changes that let me deal with solutide different from someone born before me. Due to my use of technology i am physically alone but i don't feel alone. I think new research needs to be done with how technology affects the brain. Especially the developing brain. A new type of human is being created.
@Solace Creat the internet is kind of like a mycelium Network and we are all connected we are never alone and it's going to give fruit. The transcendental object at the end of time is close.
Aloneness is beautiful. Loneliness is negative. Aloneness is peaceful. Loneliness is misery. There is a difference between aloneness and loneliness🙏
In long run, Aloneless becomes LONELINESS...
@@vishalnirwan7 n if yu can't be alone, den yu r bound to react instead of act
As what i experience, a person in regular daily meditation he/she no chance to feel loneliness.
Rested sir, love is a maditiion..
People should learn the difference between solitude being alone and loneliness those are 2 different things one is good one is bad
we come alone and we leave alone. try to learn to be mature, face it , accept it , it is normal. I see monks and nuns in china , they are all alone and they are the happiness people. I got many people around but i feel not connected, feel alone.. so just meditate .. and see thing as it is. if you are feel lonely, just use the mantra such as loneline, loneline, loneline.. keep repeat this or recite this word.. it will goes away.. feeling alone is just a feel or a mind object.. it is an illusion, it is temporary, so no need to attach to it. thanks for sharing.
Sadhu sadhu sadhu
Being alone is a superpower
Doing something alone is different from loneliness. Loneliness is really the feeling that there is nobody you can connect to. Nobody understands you, so you are truly alone.
🙏🙏🙏
Dear Rinpoche, can you please give advice on how to deal with deep invalidation? Tashi Delek !!!
*Loneliness Only exists, when one is NOT Self-Aware, of "LIFE The Real Self" !*
*"LIFE The Real Self", is NOT the human body, nor even the human entity...*
♥️
Loneliness is in need of company. Solitary is being at ease with oneself.
🙏
May be bold of me to say this but I don't think he understands what is usually meant by loneliness.
I can feel lonely even when around people. It can be a sense of being cut off, not belonging, or feelings of lovelessness.
Often i feel more lonely when I'm around people because of some fundamental differences that lead to communication or acceptance problems.
Although I love being alone, it can make me feel pretty bad if i do it for too long or if i have nobody to share things with when there is stuff worth sharing.
Also personally, I have let go of the past, that doesn't necessarily mean reinstating more connection with my family.
But I am definitely going to give that appreciation exercise a shot.
Every so called "scientist" that does not see that the universe is a living thing is just a mechanic. His mind can only process the obvious parts of life before his eyes.
Everything is alive. Life does not end at the other side of a cell's membrane. A city is an organism too. There is no isolated system in the universe. It's systems within systems, overlapping each other.
God is life itself. Everything in life is connected. We are part of a greater being. Religions are just different languages, they are an attempt to communicate this insight to other humans. With science getting more and more of the picture (macrocosm, microcosm), and people getting educated about it, it will be easier and easier for everyone to understand it.
For that:☮️, you have to see this:☯️.
I feel bored today that's why I'm lonely and I stumble to this video
Now I m alone after my mother's death. Very upset
700th like, yay 👌
The monkey mind is not the trouble... don't avoid thinking... become more aware... the monkey mind is a higher level of awareness...
Hi master, may I know how to get to meet up with you? I’m diagnosed with early stage Parkinson’s. Sometimes I met up with people saying that it’s not Parkinson’s. It’s about my past and able to cure. I’m very confused. How can I get your advice from you personally?
I walk alone in the company of many
🌹🌹🌹🙏🙏🙏💐💐💐
Rinpoche what if we are lonely and have no one but ourselves? What do we do when we have no one but ourselves to keep us company?
1sam
❤❤❤❤❤❤🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
. I love your videos. Please allow me to interrupt. I do research on how Buddhism disappeared in Bihar. I realized it never disappeared from Bihar. Buddhists simply failed to research Indian Buddhism. They looked at Buddhism through the sphere of their own cultures searching for only the Buddha. Buddha had a myriad of names in different villages according to his teachings there. Example. His favorite teaching was 'Lust and desire causes pain. Remove lust and desire, and pain is removed'. Translated into Bihari (where the Buddha story took place) it is DHUKH HARAN meaning to remove dukha. Three dozen villages pray to DUKH HARAN Baba. Its clear that DUKH HARAN Baba is none other than the Buddha. Problem is Buddhists are searching only for the Buddha. In the real Vaishali the Buddha begged for alms. The locals there pray to 'BHIKHAINI' Baba (Beggar Baba). Bhikhaini was mispronounced by Buddhists as Bhikshu. Who is BHIKHAINI Baba. The Buddha no doubt. But people are searching for a man called Buddha. In the real Vaishali, in Beluha the Buddha suffered a sickness and felt he had grown old. The locals pray to 'BURHA' Baba (Old Baba). Who is BURHA Baba. The Buddha no doubt. In the real Vaishali the Lichavies pressurized Buddha not to die. They trailed him to Bandagawan pressurizing him not to die. To put pressure in Hindi is DABESHWAR. Three dozen villages around the stupa where Buddha gave the Lichavies his patra, the villagers pray to Baba 'DABESHWAR NATH' meaning the man who won the pressurizing game. It was the the Buddha no doubt as he gave the Lichavies his patra and succeded in sending them back. But Buddhists are searching for the Buddha. In Pidhauli (Vaishali) the local deity is Bardiha Baba. Bardiha means the Baba who didn't allow us to stay where he was staying. Bardiha Baba is the Buddha no doubt because he didn't allow the crowd of Lichavies to stay with him in Bandagama. Forgive me for commenting out of the topic. I just wanted to impart this information to you and other Buddhists.
Beter a lone wolf than a follower of the herd.
When you realize that this whole experience is all You yes I understand. I wonder if you really really do know what I mean??✌️💖&💡
Your teaching have, over time, changed me I. So many positive ways ... It's been incredible... So keep up the good work and I like forward to your next teachings. Bye Stuart 😊
Love.
🙏🙏🙏
❤
❤
🙏🙏🙏