As a lifeguard I would have also rescued mom first. Mom was unconscious and drowning. The kid was flailing so she was still breathing and already in a jacket. If the kid was thrashing, the kid was breathing, mom wasn't.
Most people in an emergency like that freeze up, it's worse when they just record their phones and get in the way. I worked as a ranger with a lake and did traffic and crowd controll whenever something like that came up.
Exactly! The more I think about it, the angrier I get for OP. How dare their family give OP any kind of crap of literally rescuing their mom while the rest of the family just stood around like morons!
That's exactly what I was going to say. In the emergency room, pediatricians have a saying that goes roughly "the screaming kid is not as sick as the quiet one". This story really hit home for me because I was once in a very similar drowning scenario. My sibling was the screaming one who everybody jumped in to rescue, and I was the quiet one because I had already slipped under. I only made it because I floated to the surface face up after they pulled my sibling off from on top of me. Afterwards, they yelled at me for failing to save my sibling, which was infuriating because I nearly gave up my life for them. Decades later I still get flashbacks. I also figured out the hard way that you can't expect people to figure out the right thing to do in an emergency.
@michaeltelson9798 exactly. It's like criticizing a fireman for rushing into a burning building and saving one person who was unconscious then getting angry because at him for not saving someone else who walked out on their own instead (idk) just makes zero sense. Not one of the family put any effort in, they just stood and watched so they could complain later. What a bunch of ungrateful morons 😐
Buying $300 worth of jewelry from WALMART of all places, and then laying the receipt out like that's some sort of flex is unironically one of the funniest things ive ever heard from a reddit story 💀
Right? He could have gotten the cheapest thing available at Tiffany's, and that would still be better than $300 worth of "Wally-World" jewelry that will most likely turn her skin green. I hope she keeps that hot Latin lover in her life.
This dude is so terrible in so many ways but the receipt thing killed me. I came to mention it too lol. Even if it was nice jewelry, who lays the fkn receipt out like that
The whole first part of the story is so irrelevant to the 2nd part and the 1st part is just totally forgotten. She said she found them months and months later and my thoughts was “you stayed with him”????
For the lake story: that family is gonna have a reality check when they realize how first responders choose who to save because in this situation if they were involved they would've done the same shit. A life that's in danger always take priority. Not the age of the one in distress. There are VERY few exceptions. That girl was the only person with sense knowing that if she didn't save her mom she would've DIED. She understood her sister was already safe. Like the only thing that could've been done more is if the brother, who could swim, tugged his sister along with him, but I don't blame his initial panic esp since he's also probably very young. Just a classic case of favoritism and stupid people.
@@mhimhi2754 I guess it is favoritism. But I hope there is an update one day. I want to know why the family wanted OP to save her sister who has flotation devices and not the mom. Honestly most of those people besides OP are stupid.
Oh God, the 3rd story...OP, good on you for actually saving the person drowning. Your sister was ok, in a life jacket and just scared. Your mom was actually dying! Wtf is wrong with your family
@@dracko158 Yeah that was messed up, even if the sister was in danger you'd think after knowing everything is ok the mom would be overjoyed to know their child loves you so much that they pick you over the sister, plus from what was described nobody else helped at all but put 100% blame on op, that whole family is toxic.
@dracko158 I think it's less about a golden child, and more that she was the youngest. Most moms will put the absolute safety of their baby above themselves. But mostly wanna say that OP's actions are the reason all three of them still have a mom at all.
Every time someone berates OP for this, she should say "and what were you doing while this was happening?". And if it's mom who says something, it should be "ok mom, I won't save you the next time".
The little sister was indeed the golden child in op's family's eyes. Op did the right choice for save the mom over the little sister with floatation device on
@@annika5893 I think it's a lose lose situation here. If OP saved the sister, everyone would berate him for not saving the mom first as "she wasn't moving". And if he saves the mom first, they get mad at him for saving her first. Like wtf do they want?!
@@dracko158 exactly this. OP needs to turn this on them. "What were you doing when you watched my mom start sinking? I actually did something and saved her life."
Yeah, if i was the mom and heard of all this I would be very disappointed in the amount of care the family showed me. I'd be questioning the importance of them in my life
I'm going to try to explain this insanity, lol. The mom passed out and put her toddler daughter in harm's way. It wasn't the mom's fault, but she feels guilty about it, and it's easier to project that guilt onto her own daughter than deal with it herself. The mother feels guilt, but she knows she rationally shouldn't, so this is how she reconciles that. She's adopted the completely brainless "My babies first" mentality, rather than the more logical stance of addressing the most severe and time-sensitive emergency first, because the "cult of motherhood" that exists in society favors this emotional response over a rational one. Their mantra is "My kids first", no matter what, like that's some kind of morally superior position. She's an indoctrinated buffoon, with as little self-awareness as she has situational awareness. Likewise the slack-jawed idiots waiting ashore who did nothing feel bad about their own inactions, but they can't accept accountability. How could THEY have done anything wrong, they didn't do anything at all, lol... that makes sense to them. So they too project their own feelings of inadequacy (which they rightly earned) onto someone else so they can feel better about themselves. And this is not unexpected, sadly. This is how MOST people act in an emergency, which is why people who respond to emergencies are trained extensively... to overcome this behavior. "Fight or Flight" is a false dichotomy. Most people actually freeze. It sounds counter-intuitive. You'd think natural selection would have weeded that trait out. But the reality is quite the opposite. Before the development of social constructs like monogamy and consent, breeding was more aggressive in humans and our primate ancestors. The cave-man with a hard-on would breed more readily with the female who froze rather than the ones who ran away or fought back. The "freeze" trait is embedded in our DNA. Her family, awful as they are, were simply following their nature. The repugnant part is not their lack of action, but instead the rationalizations they make after the fact. There are so few heroes in the world because it really is a thankless job. If you cured cancer tomorrow, most of the world would be pissed that you didn't do it sooner, so as to save their loved ones who had already passed. They'd sing your praises while choking back a quiet resentment. That's the other reason there are so few heroes, people for the most part are just really shitty. If you are the hero, all you will accomplish is revealing to everyone else that they, in the same situation, were not, and they will resent it. Your actions reveal their lack of actions, and show that whole they believe themselves to be heroic, they are not. You confront them with facts that challenge their own self-perception. So people have a choice to make: • Act anyway because doing so is objectively right, and disregard the hate you will get for it. • Don't act, let the bastards drown, lol. OP chose the former, albeit not knowing the likely consequences, but she still made the right choice where no one else did. For whatever little it's worth, I'm proud of her. But maybe it's time to put a little distance in those relationships and associate more with a better caliber of people.
did they think it was 2 live on a cliff ? there 2 ways 1 mom is dead because no reach for her only the baby and seocn the both alive but blame op for bein logical than emotionnal ? op might be out ot cut htme off if they juge him BUT mom passing episdoe need watching
It’s always the norm in situations like this that children’s lives are so much more important than adult lives. To be fair, yes, if the sister didn’t have a life jacket on, the rescuer SHOULD rescue the drowning child cuz she can’t swim and is a kid with so much more life to live for. But in this situation: *gasp* SHE HAD A LIFE JACKET ON! SHE WAS GONNA BE FINE! It sounds like the adrenaline of the situation has not worn off, but if this keeps up, OP will one day explode on them that their anger is misplaced, and then they’ll all wonder years later why she’s no contact with them.
For the drowning story, op should tell their mother and everyone else "thanks for making it clear saving your life was a mistake. Sorry I didn't know back then."
Story 1: Yeah…it's very easy for a misunderstanding to happen in situations like these, and because OP was unaware that his son was gay and letting his BF into the house without OP's knowledge, OP thought there was a dangerous intruder. I don't blame OP in this case, OP didn't know
Yeah, there’s not much else he could have done. This does offer a good chance for OP to let son know he supports his sexuality though, so that’s a silver lining if he takes the opportunity
I don’t blame OP for the initial incident but I do blame him for not talking to his son afterward. It’s no surprise the kid hasn’t initiated conversation- he’s probably terrified out of his fucking mind. If not that OP will hurt him, that OP will hurt his boyfriend. That terror is what caused this incident in the first place, it’s likely a hundred times worse now.
@@beebs4283 how do you know he hasn't spoken to him? You're making ridiculous assumptions. The dad could've pistol whipped that kid for breaking into his home, but not only did he not get violent, he didn't even say anything negative to his son about sneaking the guy in. That's a pretty good sign that he's okay with his son's sexuality, and a good reason for his son to be more at ease about it, not more fearful.
Story 4: The rest of the family just sucks, they didn't even bother to actually get in the lake and join OP *UNTIL* they noticed that OP was going for the drowning mom instead of the sister with a lifejacket that was just flailing. And yet OP's TA here. OP made the more logical choice, but I guess OP made the wrong choice for letting someone who was not in danger sit on water for a while longer.
I suspect their failure to act then is the reason for their anger against OP now. They have realized that they all almost let OP's mother drown by failing to take the situation seriously and to help. Now, it is easier to get angry and falsely put blame on OP for 'taking the wrong action' than to self reflect and know that their own wrong inactions almost allowed OP's mother to drown. And yeah, that means the family sucks on so many levels.
@@javaman7199 After seeing other replies and comments, I think they're projecting. Instead of accepting that they did nothing to help, they just throw their anger at the one person that DID help
Another story of a husband wanting to become poly because he wants to have a second partner yet gets pissed when his wife gets a new partner. He did not want to be poly, he wanted to be allowed to cheat.
I think it was a story of crappy people all around, although one literally. She said she was too sick in the marriage for intimacy but was healthy enough for a random guy. I'm betting her part in story got some of the sanitization that his pants needed.
@@flemardothat did seem a bit weird. Im guessing she was using her sickness so he would not have to be intimate with her husband. She never mentioned what happened after her date with bartender dude. I bet they are still together and didn’t break it off
@@flemardo Severe depression that lasts a long time can make you very sick actually, especially if it interferes with your sleep. It can even give you autoimmune disorders so your body basically starts to destroy itself.
13:39 triage. Any unconscious individual in a dangerous setting is one of the top priorities. A kid with perfect APGAR is a green, or lowest priority for care. Your family, op, is deeply misplaced in their anger. You made the right decision, but as it sounds, it might’ve been for the wrong people. I’m sorry they’re responding to you like this.
Story 4: Why is everyone mad at OP here?? The sister was in a lifejacket and is not sinking, while OP'S mom is literally not moving and sinking! Seriously, their anger is absolutely unjustified and they handled the situation poorly, judging by how SLOW they were moving. And the mom was mad at OP too, like what?! OP isn't the bad guy here! OP is the hero!
Probably because it's a child vs mother that needs to be saved. I hope it's not that people view it as the mom has lived a long life so she's not a priority over a child
My guess is their anger is actually deflection. They're ashamed of themselves and it's easier to be angry at OP than it is to take responsibility for their own inaction.
@@walterrebele3651 Yes, if not that as the reason then there seems to be something relevant left out of the story that could explain the families attitude.
@@glennrishton5679You do have to wonder about that. We usually only get one side. As it was told, though, it sounded like the right call to save the unconscious person who didn’t have a flotation device. I wish I could assume there had to be more to the story because people wouldn’t be so stupid as to think that choice was wrong, but we’ve all heard of families that are clueless.
@@glennrishton5679 Drowning is a silent killer. The sister was screaming and flailing, while the mom was unconscious and doing nothing. Likely the reason no one responded to the mom, was because no one paid attention or realized the mom was in trouble. Meanwhile, the sister was visibly and audibly in need of help, so she got all the attention. Realizing after the fact what was going on, the family should change their tune, but sometimes when you're so far up on your high horse, it hurts more to get down. As for the mom herself, probably prioritizing her daughter before herself. Parents tend to do that.
I agree with you Dabne. The sister was fine in a life vest. OP's mom was going to die if not rescued. Everyone except OP is wrong including their mom. WTF?
The family mad at OP for saving drowning mom, ask them every time "And what were you doing? Where were you?" I applaud OP for rightly evaluating who needed immediate help despite their own fear.
They'll just get angry at him for "talking back to adults". They've already decided he's at fault for everything as the scapegoat. You can't argue with entitled idiots.
The ironic thing is that if OP had "saved" her sister first (who didn't need saving anyway) it's likely her mom would've died, and then the family would've still been mad at her for NOT saving her mother first. It's a damned if you do, damned if you don't situation.
Lake story: Rslash said it best. Sister had a life vest. She wasn’t in real danger. Mom had no life vest and was unconscious. She was in real and immediate danger. Now, playing devil’s advocate, a frightened child screaming and flailing is going to attract more attention than an unconscious woman who people from a distance may be unable to know is unconscious. I could understand that knee jerk reaction, but to maintain the stance of sister is more important after learning the facts puts them firmly in the wrong
Story 4: OP’s family are idiots. The youngest was OK. She would just panicking because her mom passed out. And since there were several capable adults, I don’t see why OP needed to prioritize his sister when there were plenty of people that could go get her. Tell that ungrateful mom that next time you’ll just let her drown since that’s what she wanted.
Since everybody survived, they got the best possible outcome. What are they complaining about? At this point, remind them that they are complaining that the mother is still alive.
Story 1:OP you thought an adult intruder snuck into your home and was attacking your son. No one is going to call you a bad person for just trying to protect your family. Plus, it’s not like the boy was hurt. Also you do need to talk to him about it, let him know that it’s fine if he’s gay and that you’re sorry if he’s scared his BF. But he can’t be sneaking him in like that. It gave you the wrong idea and terrified his sister.
That father is a bad person... for not IMMEDIATELY clearing things up with the child he just pointed a gun at and threatened. Instead he says nothing to him or his son, and decides to ask the internet? Damage is done. Irrevocably.
I say this, as a gay man who came out in extremely similar circumstances. That relationship (with father) was permanently damaged and will never recover. Some situations (such as a gun pointed in your face as a teen, by your father), never leave you.
@@gabrielr.5937 No! If you allow some random teenager to sneak you into his home with a gun owning father, you're stupid (and horny)! And your partner is an asshole (and horny)! Seriously a 16 year old in the US should realise how stupid such an action was! And happy that he got away with his life!
@@gabrielr.5937at that moment I guarantee you neither of those kids would have heard anything there scared out of their minds anything OP says is going to go in 1 ear and out the other hes smart for waiting until his son calms down absolutely needs to talk to his son though
Drowning story: If I was in OP’s shoes, I would’ve done the same as they did. They got a hold of the situation, judged that their sister was fine and their mother was in need of help, and SAVED THEIR MOTHER’S LIFE! I 100% stand behind OP!
Story 4: OP chose to save the person in most immediate danger. Mom's life was in immediate risk, sister's was not. As an Eagle Scout with extensive water safety training THIS IS WHAT YOU DO. OP's emergency situation triage was flawless.
Since everybody survived, they got the best possible outcome. What are they complaining about? At this point, remind them that they are complaining that the mother is still alive.
It's insane & infuriating how often a person begs their spouse for an "open relationship" because they've become attracted to someone else. But then gets angry & jealous if the spouse decides to also take part in that open relationship. I've been through it twice!
Fourth story: I would be so pissed if I was OP. I just saved your LIFE, and you're yelling at me because the one person who had a LIFE JACKET almost pissed their pants!? Its absurd. If I saved my mom and she did that, I'd tell her then I'd rather she drowned. Harsh, sure, but no one in the family is listening with the nice words. NTA 0/5
Last story: take the camera go to the police, have them check for any other cameras. Get a restraining order, even if it just temporary. Keep your parents away from you as much as possible. Your fiancé is sweet, but is very naïve to want to give them a second chance after being a camera in your apartment. Especially when their reasoning is beyond creepy, and they think they still have authority over you to come over and talk about why what they did was okay.
Mom over sister: I also don't understand OP's family, but maybe there's some weird "reflex" in some people to go for little kids first if they are in distress. Recently there was an accident when a kid in a lifejacket fell overboard on a lake and panicked. Both parents jumped to save her, but they couldn't swim and both drowned. They weren't wearing lifejackets. The kid was completely safe all the time, some random people fished her out.
My pessimistic side is coming out in the story where OP saves her mother. Well I guess you would have drowned then I would say if I were OP. My confusion is why was everyone else just standing. Are there dumbstruck? That story makes me mad for OP.
@@hollytheanimalcrossingfan That is my exact feeling too. I think OP should confront her family. I have a feeling that there is more than just “oh you should saved your whiny sister.”
@@Maria_Miciano_5Right? If they’re this hateful when everyone lived, imagine their reaction if someone had died! Also shame on that mom. A good parent might have preferred to die if a child was at risk but if your kid saves you in a crisis where adults are doing almost nothing, you should have understanding for the difficult position your kid was placed in. Your mom should at least have your back in this. It sucks that this kid saved their mom and that mom won’t even be grateful or stick up for them.
@@BeeWhistler Exactly! Now I’m wondering, I know some Reddit posts are fake. But this one would be kind of a weird one to post. I don’t know why I thought about it. But it is just a hunch on my part. The mom should be grateful but what do I know about being ungrateful for my life.
The drowning mom story, that whole family should go to family therapy. The 3 year old is traumatized probably mostly from seeing her mom feint and drowning in front of her, the 10 year old is traumatized from it too but tried to help with only OP taking him seriously, then also the parents taking it out on OP for prioritizing the mom over the sister who wasn’t in immediate danger
I doubt they're trophies. Probably shame and not wanting anyone to know so he holds onto them till he can get a chance to throw them out, but keeps forgetting
The second story reminds me of something similar from a true crime story. I don't remember the names but here's what happened: The sister had a twin. Her BIL was married to her sister. They had 2 kids together. However her SIL hated her twin sister for whatever reason. And their relationship was bad. Long story short, the SIL (BIL sister) shot her twin sister while she was pregnant. I think they were able to save the baby (I could be wrong), but the twin sister died from her injuries. Her 4 year old son ran out and asked the neighbor to call the cops, saying, "My aunt shot my mom." The sister was there for the BIL and the whole trial. A year or two after her twin sister's death, the sister wound up with the brother in law. The sister said this in an interview, "At the time, we were both grieving and trying to stay strong for the kids. Over time we had a stronger friendship built over the grief and wound up falling for each other. Sometimes I wonder if my sister is okay with this, but knowing her, I'm pretty sure she's at ease knowing her husband and kids will be loved and protected always. I'm sure she's at peace with it." As for the SIL who shot her twin sister, she's in prison without parole and her brother disowned her as of right now. When asked if he'll ever see her, he responded, "Not right now. I can't forgive her. She killed my wife. While I still love my sister, I can't forgive her right now for what she did. Eventually if I do decide to see her, i want to know the truth of why she did it and why she took my wife away from everyone who loved her, including my kids. "
“I cant forgive her right now” RIGHT NOW!? the fuck is wrong with this guy! If someone MURDERED my wife, there’s no coming back from that! Literally nothing!
@@realrealwarpet I think those were the words. It was either right now or not at all. I'll need to find the interview video to clarify. But yeah since then, the sister in law isn't allowed to see the kids and I don't think the brother has visited his sister since.
1: OP reacting normally to a potential threat. Understandable. 2: OP is a victim of emotions and possibly of BIL. Either way, she shouldn't feel dirty or anything else, as it's not her fault. 3: Dude needs to see medical help. 4: Triage/prioritizing. Who can be saved and needs it the most urgently? Mom. OP made the right call. The rest of the family are just pissed because it meant they had to get off of their lazy rears and actually help. 5: OP should definitely file a police report. She should also have a chat with her fiance and get him to take her side with going NC with her parents. Maybe when they realize that they can and will lose full contact with their daughter, they'll agree to change their behavior towards her and her fiance. Especially when she points out that he's the reason she's even considered keeping any kind of contact with them.
2: I don’t even think she’s a victim. Or rather, they’re both victims in different ways. She doesn’t have anything to feel guilty about, death is hard. Grief is hard. At least he doesn’t seem to want her to replace her sister, I’ve seen that one before in these situations.
While you can still cheat in a poly relationship. This was her only partner. I see nothing wrong with what she did. Husband just wanted to cheat and his wife to stay home and got mad when she was getting attention while he was led on.
Story 4: OP's family is crazy! The sister was wearing a life jacket, so she was not in immediate danger of drowning. "How could you abandon your sister like that?" "What? You mean 'thanks for saving my life'! I'm a hero!" There should be laws requiring people to side with the hero, every time.
Since everybody survived, they got the best possible outcome. What are they complaining about? At this point, remind them that they are complaining that the mother is still alive.
"He said we shouldn't tell anyone about it & _I don't plan to_ " - except for right now, where I tell millions of strangers (& probably some people who know me) on the internet.
Oh god this dude I knew in college, first and last time I ever went over to his place I saw the kitchen sink with a pile of shitty boxers soaking in bleach. The kitchen reeked like a combination of raw unflushed sewage and what must've been a whole jug of bleach. And he just walked right past it like it was nothing.
Story 4: If I was in OPs shoes here, I'd be asking which one of them poisoned my mom or if it was a group effort. It feels suspicious that she just randomly fainted with no known cause, and everyone is angry that OP saved her. I know something so dramatic is probably not true, but at least I would hope the question would shut them up about it.
Saving an unconscious person is definitely more critical than saving a child who is wearing a life jacket! The unconscious person will drown quickly. An awake, alert, and flailing person in a life jacket will be okay for a lot longer. Hell, depending on the life jacket, the sister might not have been capable of drowning.
Mom over sister: I wanna know OP’s age during the save. No matter the age, OP was in the right and the rest of the family did those kids wrong. But I still want to know the age of OP, because what age person are they abusing over SAVING SONEONE’S LIFE?
Story one.... OP did exactly right, defending his family and home. NTA. 😮 Mom vs. Sister story.... OP again did exactly right! Mom was DYING! Sis was not in immediate danger. All those Flying Monkeys are total AHs. Why were THEY doing NOTHING!? 😡
S1: As someone who had prior lifeguard and CPR training, what OP did was right. The mom who passed out while swimming was in more danger cause of a lack of flotation device, her safety comes first. If OP had saved his sister who had a life vest on, then his little brother would have been in Danger cause he was trying to keep mom afloat but was losing strength. It would have led to a tragic loss of two lives. OP needs to write them a letter saying what he did was the correct path and albeit give what would have happened if he went after the sister first then say he will not be contacting them for a while(no given date or time frame) and sincerely hopes that once they have gone through therapy and have had the time to process the events, they are free to reach out to him to discuss it in a neutral location of his choosing. He should further add that regardless if they choose to forgive him and themselves or continue to hate him, that he still and always love them. Perhaps being served with a dish of reality might make them come around after they realize that they have no way to spit at him cause he ain't reaching out.
The Soiling Pants story: Coughing can evoke muscles to work that shouldn't. I've known people that puke, urinate or defecate themselves if they cough too hard. Anyone who has coughed with a full bladder and leaked a bit knows how this is. It's just something weird the body does when coughing sometimes. The husband was likely embarrassed about it and didn't want OP knowing, hence why he kept them (probably for later disposal but keeps getting caught before he fills the bag and gets rid of them or does the load of laundry himself alone). It's not exactly incontinence, just something that is triggered specifically by coughing and isn't his fault at all.
Story five: OP should visit the parents and sneak a nanny cam or two in. Let them feel violated and see if that changes their attitude. Also, ask them if they ever expect to hold a grandchild with that kind of thinking.
1st story, man this isnt on you, their sneaking around is what caused this, you thought it was a home intruder and by the noise being made you thought someone was hurting your son. Sit down with him and explain that and apologise, ask your son to invite his friend over so you can also apologise to him. Maybe here set up some ground rules, like no sneaking into the house in the middle of the night. Knock on the front door, he is welcome. Exactly how you would treat it if he was a girl sneaking into your sons room. Dont point out they are gay, its just the same as a hetero relationship. If you are uncomfortable with them having sex under your roof say so, thats within your rights, just treat them like the couple they are. You just want them to stop sneaking around. You can talk about their relationship, be supportive etc, just make sure its clear that the incident was a home intruder and fearing your son was in danger and the huge relief that he wasnt.
I agree with everything you said, except the first sentence. I would agree, if the father had stopped and explained everything immediately. By going to the internet and letting the boy run out, he's letting the two teens create their own narrative based on events. Based on events, and the father not talking to him for a while... damage is already done at this point.
Op's family is nuts. Its basic rescue procedure to help the person who is in the most danger first. The sister had a flotation device so she was in the least danger. The mom was passed out, drowning, and the brother could have drowned to trying to save his mother alone. So yeah this OP shouldnt worry about what their family says.
I think the mom in the almost-drowning story might be somewhat in denial. Like, it's so much easier to insist "I was fine, your sister needed you" than to admit "you saved my life and this might happen again because no one knows what's going on". The mom is probably more scared than she's letting on. But the rest of the family don't have that excuse, even if they're scared that someone they love might be in serious danger. I've been the family in a situation where someone was in a medical emergency, and yeah, I didn't want to admit that my mom was probably dying (she did), but when the doctors needed me to make a godsdamned decision, I set aside my fear of losing her and made the best choice for her in that moment because that's what you HAVE to do. Honestly, I used to think I was bad in a crisis because I can get overly-emotional, but it genuinely feels like I have more sense than most people because I can minorly compartmentalize. Sure, I can't stop myself from crying, but I can say "you (pointing at a specific person at random who I'm confident has a phone) call 911, NOW" while crying, and can generally figure out priorities based on actual risk and not who's the most upset or the youngest or most vulnerable in general but not at this specific moment.
Drowning mom story weirds me out. You have 1 person active and 3 people who potentially could be in distress and needing help. Drowning Mom, who is in most urgent need, AND with little kids, so it would be really great for her to not die... Youngish son, who can swim, but can't save mom. Very young daughter who is wearing a life jacket. Obviously panicking, but unless you're in the ocean (or her lifejacket is way too small to be useful) is in no actual danger. Yeah, deal with the dying person first. Deal with the panicking person second. Anyone who disagrees is literally an imbecile.
Story about pants pooper: I’m the pants pooper in my family, but I’ve been radiated down there for rectal cancer. Control isn’t perfect, but after accidents things are washed or thrown away. Also wear Depends often.
Poop man story: I think you're asking the wrong question. If OP's husband has known for over 12 years that he has poop accidents when he coughs, why would he not wear adult diapers? Keeping soiled clothing is pretty common for children & teens. They somehow think it's safer for them to hide it in their bedroom or car than to throw it out. I haven't heard of an adult doing that, but maybe? If you want to go down a dark (but very improbable) path...Teen boys who are being SA'd will either refuse to wipe themselves or start having accidents. Maybe the hubby has repressed the memories and/or that happening caused OP's hubby to stop mentally and/or emotionally maturing. More likely, his depression from his obsession caused him to be depressed enough that throwing them out felt like too much work. Or, he has trophies from his fetish. Or he's keeping them to show the stripper that he's so dedicated to showing her he loves her, that he's giving himself accidents (obsessions can be SUPER weird and nonsensical)
Last Story - Spying Parents I have to admit, I'm a little disappointed in OP. While her parents needed to be confronted about the hidden camera in her apartment, she jumped the gun a bit. This was a golden opportunity for low-comedy. If they want to make sure she's not having sex in her own home, that's just daring them to have the weirdest sex imaginable first, right in front of the camera. ...And I mean "WEIRD", like 6-foot party sub, a promiscuous armadillo, and sock puppets... lots and lots of sock puppets. Why send them to court for a day when you can send them into therapy for the rest of their lives? And this would have been a boon to her relationship with her boyfriend, rather thana strain. The sexiest women in the world are those you can best describe with the term "Whimsically Mischievous"... imagining all that might have been just makes me sad for this couple.
Mom over sister story: unfortunately OP is learning the hard way that his sister os the golden child who's comfort is more important than the lives of others, and he is the scapegoat who is somehow at fault for every single problem.
Lake story:So her family would prefer the three of them lose their mother than her sister be uncomfortable for a little bit while she saved her mom’s life? Truly I would get angry. I’m sure OP is going through the guilt stage and I hope she goes to therapy to talk about her thought process when saving her mom and how her family failed to help in a emergency and then shamed her. I hope she takes what she feels and turns that into motivation to stick up for herself and do what she thinks is right in every situation. Imagine how hard it is for her to trust herself in emergencies now. Her family should feel ashamed of themselves but they don’t seem like the kind of people who take accountability.
The story where OP saved her mother sounded like a 'Damned if you do, damned if you don't' scenario. If she had saved the sister, they'd still be mad at her. Op is clearly a scapegoat and her family is mega toxic. OP, you did a good thing, don't beat yourself up.
Did everyone just miss the statement that after The Opie saved The Mother, even *The Mother* was angry at him? _"Sorry mum, I should've just let you drownd."_
Since everybody survived, they got the best possible outcome. What are they complaining about? At this point, remind them that they are complaining that the mother is still alive.
@@javaman7199maybe secretly they wanted the mother to kick the bucket 🤣 would not be surprised if that was the case, she sounds insufferable for blaming OP too
Repeatedly* It's not technically breaking in, since he was invited. Teenagers sneaking in & out of houses is pretty common, unfortunately. Always has been.
@@Richard_Nickersonthe rest of the family had no idea what was going on. For the daughter, it does appear some random dude is repeatedly break in for an unknown reason. For the dad to see what he saw, his reasoning for what he did is justified. Glad he asked questions first. The son was a horny moron.
It's rich that everyone is attacking Op for saving the one in immediate danger yet none of them bothered to jump into action until they saw Op going for the mom. I can only imagine the mom being upset due to not knowing the actual true series of events. With how nasty everyone is being, I wouldn't put it past them to conveniently leave out that the sister was safe in her floaters and not drowning. However, I do think it's most likely coming from a protective mother's pov of "save my baby first".
Mom over sister: when I heard the title of this one I was angry at OP. But the moment we got to "mom suddenly passed out" and "sister had on a swim vest" I was completely on OPs side. The sister is conscious, moving, and not at risk of going under. She is not the immediate priority.
I'm not sure what's wrong with poopy pants, but that DOES sound like a medical condition to me. It's probably something he doesn't want to get checked out because he's too embarrassed.
story 4: op did the smartest thing in the situation. save the person drowning. everyone else were safe already. you can panic all you want while strapped to a flotation device, you will not drown.
Anyone who has done any kind of emergency training will know... always help the unconscious first. If they're screaming, they're alive. The three-year-old, despite being traumatised, was safe because she was in a life jacket. The mother was unconscious and slipping under the water. Honestly, untrained friends and family in hysterics are the worst because they don't want people they don't know rescuing their loved ones and the like. During emergencies, you need cold logic... or perfectly correct instincts in this case.
MOS- mom was drowning and sister was in a life jacket. This family makes no sense at all. She should be mad at everyone else who wasnt rushing to the rescue not to the one person who did.
Since everybody survived, they got the best possible outcome. What are they complaining about? At this point, remind them that they are complaining that the mother is still alive.
I remember when I was at a theme park. Me, my mom, my sister, and my sister's boyfriend were walking toward a roller coaster. The path we took was blocked. I see my mom climbing over the rail to get to the other side that wasn't blocked off. I told her we could just walk around, but she was, in her words, "too lazy". One of her legs fell through the gaps between the wooden rails, and she panicked. I pulled her; she said I was hurting her. My sister and her boyfriend joined in, with the same result. I tell the two of them to hold her while I go to the other side to push. They told me to keep pulling; I told them nothing was working and ran to the other side. Either my mom decided to finally push herself up, or they got the right angle to pull her because as soon as I was on the other side, she was free. She then gave me the silent treatment for "abandoning" her. As a teenager at the time, I felt bad but thinking back on it, this was her fault. Plus, the gap was so small, that you could squeeze a limb in there but not your body, so she was fine.
And/or it's them bashing the fiance for his religion. Based on the fact that they're obsessed with their daughter's 'purity', I'm willing to bet they're a very religious family, and a lot of extremists not only look down on other religions, but actually insinuate that any religion other than their own is evil
OP didn't "choose her mom" over her sister, she rescued the person that was actually in danger! Her sister had a life jacket on, she wasn't in danger! If she had waited to rescue her mom, the woman could have died! And for what? A child that wasn't in any danger?
I miss fresh, bumfris, and cuestar, but that doesn't mean I don't love waking up and getting ready to an Rslash video. I've subbed pre the Illuminaughty bs and always knew she was sus. I hope you're family is doing well.
Honestly op made the correct decision. The mom was unconscious and unable to keep herself afloat. The kid had a life vest. If you can stay afloat, you're more likely to survive longer than if you can't
Omg the drowning story. OP if you see this, I promise you that you 100% did the correct thing. Your sister had a life jacket on, your mom did not and was about to die. If you love anywhere near Ohio, you can be a part of my family. We are all kind and love each other. Its rare I know, but true.
every water safety class i've taken would have you go to the mom first, on top of that they would have you not go to the sister unless she falls unconscious, someone who is struggling and panicking is likely to push you under, because they are no longer in control, that flailing is a reflex that doesn't care if you're the president of the united states, it will grab you, recognize something in the water that floats, and tries to climb on top, someone who is panicking is to be handled by a trained professional, or tossed something they can hold onto to keep them afloat
Story 4: Jeez, this one is frustrating to hear. Honestly, if pushed to the point of no contact, I genuinely would've been the kind of person to look my mom in the eye and say "I should've helped my sister and left you." That response would genuinely shake her and drive the point home
Idk why but i want to hear an update about the life jacket story. Have op confront their family on their thought process. Though in a wise way of course
13:28 I went to look and sadly the story was removed and Op's account was suspended so there's no update but I really hope the family pulls their heads out of there assses. THE MOTHER WAS DROWNING!! and it all happened so fast so op was just running and acting and knew her sis had a life jacket! I really hope op knows they did the right thing and that things will maybe turn around.
The mom over sister story, I would’ve done the same thing op did. Especially considering while op tended to the mother who was literally drowning, there were other family members who could have rushed to help either the sister or the mom. Apparently none of the family did that until things escalated. Op absolutely did the right thing.
Story 2: I’m going to try and believe that the guy made a mistake out of unprocessed grieve, and didn’t really think about what he was doing. OP needs to take some time away from this guy who knew her since she was a child. Also if it’s bothering her that much even if she doesn’t feel comfortable telling her parents, I think she does need to talk to someone about it.
I would be checking to make sure they don't have a life insurance policy on your mom that pays out to them. That would be right there all the explanation needed
It's not even like there was cheating involved. The guy's a widow. It sounded consensual (although I am concerned that she just sorta... Went limp? That's not right) and they're both single. All is good as far as I can see
Devil's Advocate: Save the mother first. The mother can provide, the child cannot. Not sure if there's a dad in the family, but if there's not, saving the child will make them orphans.
As a person in the medical field, A life saver, people who are drowning do not flail and splash about like in the movies. They just sink below. The others were in life jackets and flailing and splashing so not drowning. It was a Triage situation and OP correctly evaluated the situation and saved mom from drowning first. The family are completely ignorant and uneducated about crisis situations and water crisis situations. Well done OP. If you didn't do the correct thing this would be a story about a mom passing away because no one knew better.
Mom over sister: i saw the comments saying 'flotation device' and thought like, water wings. Still, unconscious vs conscious, etc. But no, OP says life jacket. Good grief, yeah the sister is going to stay above the water for the short amount of time needed, almost like that was probably the logic behind putting her in one to begin with. The little sister is probably terrified of water at the moment because every other family member acted and is still acting like she was about to visit Davy Jones' locker while her brother is screaming and her mom just went under the water
Story 4: I think the mother was mad because (good) parents would rather have their children safe than themselves safe. Also flailing baby is probably more noticeable, so the family was focused on her. Doesn’t mean they shouldn’t have helped, though.
True, many parents would rather die than let their child die. But OP is not a parent. He has a much deeper bond with his mother than his baby sister. It's expected honestly, so his family should have been more understanding.
Ya saving an activly drowning person is way more important than someone with a flotation device. The only thing i can think is that the sister was also in some lesser danger. At 3 i doubt they bought a perfectly fitting life jacket so she probably was bobbing and getting water in her nose and mouth, just not to a dangerous extent. The fact shes terrified of water and started flailing at all tells me she probably did have something happen. OP still did make the correct decision. Unfortunatly OP is going to have to live with this bs harrassment even from her own mom.
As a lifeguard I would have also rescued mom first. Mom was unconscious and drowning. The kid was flailing so she was still breathing and already in a jacket. If the kid was thrashing, the kid was breathing, mom wasn't.
Why didn’t other family members assist? That’s what I question. OP reacted to the situation and the sheep stood there going Baa!
Most people in an emergency like that freeze up, it's worse when they just record their phones and get in the way. I worked as a ranger with a lake and did traffic and crowd controll whenever something like that came up.
Exactly! The more I think about it, the angrier I get for OP. How dare their family give OP any kind of crap of literally rescuing their mom while the rest of the family just stood around like morons!
That's exactly what I was going to say. In the emergency room, pediatricians have a saying that goes roughly "the screaming kid is not as sick as the quiet one".
This story really hit home for me because I was once in a very similar drowning scenario. My sibling was the screaming one who everybody jumped in to rescue, and I was the quiet one because I had already slipped under. I only made it because I floated to the surface face up after they pulled my sibling off from on top of me. Afterwards, they yelled at me for failing to save my sibling, which was infuriating because I nearly gave up my life for them. Decades later I still get flashbacks. I also figured out the hard way that you can't expect people to figure out the right thing to do in an emergency.
@michaeltelson9798 exactly. It's like criticizing a fireman for rushing into a burning building and saving one person who was unconscious then getting angry because at him for not saving someone else who walked out on their own instead (idk) just makes zero sense. Not one of the family put any effort in, they just stood and watched so they could complain later. What a bunch of ungrateful morons 😐
Buying $300 worth of jewelry from WALMART of all places, and then laying the receipt out like that's some sort of flex is unironically one of the funniest things ive ever heard from a reddit story 💀
Right? He could have gotten the cheapest thing available at Tiffany's, and that would still be better than $300 worth of "Wally-World" jewelry that will most likely turn her skin green. I hope she keeps that hot Latin lover in her life.
Yeah the whole poopy pants thing is totally irrelevant. Even without that, this guy is a PoS and she needs to end this.
This dude is so terrible in so many ways but the receipt thing killed me. I came to mention it too lol. Even if it was nice jewelry, who lays the fkn receipt out like that
@@lucascornelisse6896 someone who wants you to know and feel indebted for the gift.
The whole first part of the story is so irrelevant to the 2nd part and the 1st part is just totally forgotten. She said she found them months and months later and my thoughts was “you stayed with him”????
For the lake story: that family is gonna have a reality check when they realize how first responders choose who to save because in this situation if they were involved they would've done the same shit. A life that's in danger always take priority. Not the age of the one in distress. There are VERY few exceptions. That girl was the only person with sense knowing that if she didn't save her mom she would've DIED. She understood her sister was already safe. Like the only thing that could've been done more is if the brother, who could swim, tugged his sister along with him, but I don't blame his initial panic esp since he's also probably very young.
Just a classic case of favoritism and stupid people.
Highly unlikely they will ever have that reality check. They will just keep on blaming OP for their own failings.
@@mhimhi2754 I guess it is favoritism. But I hope there is an update one day. I want to know why the family wanted OP to save her sister who has flotation devices and not the mom. Honestly most of those people besides OP are stupid.
Oh God, the 3rd story...OP, good on you for actually saving the person drowning. Your sister was ok, in a life jacket and just scared. Your mom was actually dying! Wtf is wrong with your family
The fact the mom also got mad at OP spoke volumes here. The sister was clearly the golden child, and OP is the black sheep in their eyes.
3rd story was the poop story which makes the drowning comment sound really bad out of context
@@dracko158 Yeah that was messed up, even if the sister was in danger you'd think after knowing everything is ok the mom would be overjoyed to know their child loves you so much that they pick you over the sister, plus from what was described nobody else helped at all but put 100% blame on op, that whole family is toxic.
@@dracko158 plus they are ignoring the brother as 'he could swim'
@dracko158 I think it's less about a golden child, and more that she was the youngest. Most moms will put the absolute safety of their baby above themselves.
But mostly wanna say that OP's actions are the reason all three of them still have a mom at all.
The sister didn’t need immediate saving; the mom did!!! She had a floatation device. She could have waited a few minutes.
Every time someone berates OP for this, she should say "and what were you doing while this was happening?". And if it's mom who says something, it should be "ok mom, I won't save you the next time".
The little sister was indeed the golden child in op's family's eyes. Op did the right choice for save the mom over the little sister with floatation device on
@@annika5893 I think it's a lose lose situation here. If OP saved the sister, everyone would berate him for not saving the mom first as "she wasn't moving". And if he saves the mom first, they get mad at him for saving her first. Like wtf do they want?!
@@dracko158 exactly this. OP needs to turn this on them. "What were you doing when you watched my mom start sinking? I actually did something and saved her life."
What really got me was that they don't care about the brother because he wasn't injured. NEITHER WAS THE SISTER!
Mom over sister: OP is absolutely in the right. The family is so unreasonable. Mixing time and water is so dangerous
Yeah, if i was the mom and heard of all this I would be very disappointed in the amount of care the family showed me. I'd be questioning the importance of them in my life
I'm going to try to explain this insanity, lol.
The mom passed out and put her toddler daughter in harm's way. It wasn't the mom's fault, but she feels guilty about it, and it's easier to project that guilt onto her own daughter than deal with it herself. The mother feels guilt, but she knows she rationally shouldn't, so this is how she reconciles that. She's adopted the completely brainless "My babies first" mentality, rather than the more logical stance of addressing the most severe and time-sensitive emergency first, because the "cult of motherhood" that exists in society favors this emotional response over a rational one. Their mantra is "My kids first", no matter what, like that's some kind of morally superior position. She's an indoctrinated buffoon, with as little self-awareness as she has situational awareness.
Likewise the slack-jawed idiots waiting ashore who did nothing feel bad about their own inactions, but they can't accept accountability. How could THEY have done anything wrong, they didn't do anything at all, lol... that makes sense to them. So they too project their own feelings of inadequacy (which they rightly earned) onto someone else so they can feel better about themselves.
And this is not unexpected, sadly. This is how MOST people act in an emergency, which is why people who respond to emergencies are trained extensively... to overcome this behavior.
"Fight or Flight" is a false dichotomy. Most people actually freeze. It sounds counter-intuitive. You'd think natural selection would have weeded that trait out. But the reality is quite the opposite. Before the development of social constructs like monogamy and consent, breeding was more aggressive in humans and our primate ancestors. The cave-man with a hard-on would breed more readily with the female who froze rather than the ones who ran away or fought back. The "freeze" trait is embedded in our DNA. Her family, awful as they are, were simply following their nature. The repugnant part is not their lack of action, but instead the rationalizations they make after the fact.
There are so few heroes in the world because it really is a thankless job. If you cured cancer tomorrow, most of the world would be pissed that you didn't do it sooner, so as to save their loved ones who had already passed. They'd sing your praises while choking back a quiet resentment. That's the other reason there are so few heroes, people for the most part are just really shitty. If you are the hero, all you will accomplish is revealing to everyone else that they, in the same situation, were not, and they will resent it. Your actions reveal their lack of actions, and show that whole they believe themselves to be heroic, they are not. You confront them with facts that challenge their own self-perception.
So people have a choice to make:
• Act anyway because doing so is objectively right, and disregard the hate you will get for it.
• Don't act, let the bastards drown, lol.
OP chose the former, albeit not knowing the likely consequences, but she still made the right choice where no one else did. For whatever little it's worth, I'm proud of her. But maybe it's time to put a little distance in those relationships and associate more with a better caliber of people.
Agreed. OP was the hero. Heroes should have the right to be appreciated.
did they think it was 2 live on a cliff ? there 2 ways 1 mom is dead because no reach for her only the baby and seocn the both alive but blame op for bein logical than emotionnal ? op might be out ot cut htme off if they juge him BUT mom passing episdoe need watching
It’s always the norm in situations like this that children’s lives are so much more important than adult lives. To be fair, yes, if the sister didn’t have a life jacket on, the rescuer SHOULD rescue the drowning child cuz she can’t swim and is a kid with so much more life to live for. But in this situation: *gasp* SHE HAD A LIFE JACKET ON! SHE WAS GONNA BE FINE! It sounds like the adrenaline of the situation has not worn off, but if this keeps up, OP will one day explode on them that their anger is misplaced, and then they’ll all wonder years later why she’s no contact with them.
For the drowning story, op should tell their mother and everyone else "thanks for making it clear saving your life was a mistake. Sorry I didn't know back then."
"Next time you pass out from your mystery condition, I'll be sure to do nothing to help you."
"Glad to know you don't fuckin matter, mom. I'll remember that when you need help in the future."
Story 1: Yeah…it's very easy for a misunderstanding to happen in situations like these, and because OP was unaware that his son was gay and letting his BF into the house without OP's knowledge, OP thought there was a dangerous intruder.
I don't blame OP in this case, OP didn't know
Yeah, OP clearly did the right thing by trying to protect his family from an intruder.
I'm glad that this did not have a tragic ending.
Yeah, there’s not much else he could have done. This does offer a good chance for OP to let son know he supports his sexuality though, so that’s a silver lining if he takes the opportunity
I don’t blame OP for the initial incident but I do blame him for not talking to his son afterward. It’s no surprise the kid hasn’t initiated conversation- he’s probably terrified out of his fucking mind. If not that OP will hurt him, that OP will hurt his boyfriend. That terror is what caused this incident in the first place, it’s likely a hundred times worse now.
@@beebs4283 how do you know he hasn't spoken to him? You're making ridiculous assumptions. The dad could've pistol whipped that kid for breaking into his home, but not only did he not get violent, he didn't even say anything negative to his son about sneaking the guy in. That's a pretty good sign that he's okay with his son's sexuality, and a good reason for his son to be more at ease about it, not more fearful.
Story 4: The rest of the family just sucks, they didn't even bother to actually get in the lake and join OP *UNTIL* they noticed that OP was going for the drowning mom instead of the sister with a lifejacket that was just flailing. And yet OP's TA here.
OP made the more logical choice, but I guess OP made the wrong choice for letting someone who was not in danger sit on water for a while longer.
I think their backlashing is actually projection and it comes out in the form of emotional abuse. These people suck.
I suspect their failure to act then is the reason for their anger against OP now.
They have realized that they all almost let OP's mother drown by failing to take the situation seriously and to help.
Now, it is easier to get angry and falsely put blame on OP for 'taking the wrong action' than to self reflect and know that their own wrong inactions almost allowed OP's mother to drown.
And yeah, that means the family sucks on so many levels.
If everyone survived, then what are they complaining about? They got the best possible outcome.
@@javaman7199 After seeing other replies and comments, I think they're projecting. Instead of accepting that they did nothing to help, they just throw their anger at the one person that DID help
Another story of a husband wanting to become poly because he wants to have a second partner yet gets pissed when his wife gets a new partner. He did not want to be poly, he wanted to be allowed to cheat.
I think it was a story of crappy people all around, although one literally. She said she was too sick in the marriage for intimacy but was healthy enough for a random guy. I'm betting her part in story got some of the sanitization that his pants needed.
Yep. They’re never truly poly it’s just a way to get the blessing to treat
@@flemardothat did seem a bit weird. Im guessing she was using her sickness so he would not have to be intimate with her husband. She never mentioned what happened after her date with bartender dude. I bet they are still together and didn’t break it off
@@flemardo Severe depression that lasts a long time can make you very sick actually, especially if it interferes with your sleep. It can even give you autoimmune disorders so your body basically starts to destroy itself.
Yeah, that's what "poly" is. Cheating.
13:39 triage. Any unconscious individual in a dangerous setting is one of the top priorities. A kid with perfect APGAR is a green, or lowest priority for care. Your family, op, is deeply misplaced in their anger. You made the right decision, but as it sounds, it might’ve been for the wrong people. I’m sorry they’re responding to you like this.
Story 4: Why is everyone mad at OP here?? The sister was in a lifejacket and is not sinking, while OP'S mom is literally not moving and sinking! Seriously, their anger is absolutely unjustified and they handled the situation poorly, judging by how SLOW they were moving. And the mom was mad at OP too, like what?! OP isn't the bad guy here! OP is the hero!
Probably because it's a child vs mother that needs to be saved. I hope it's not that people view it as the mom has lived a long life so she's not a priority over a child
My guess is their anger is actually deflection. They're ashamed of themselves and it's easier to be angry at OP than it is to take responsibility for their own inaction.
@@walterrebele3651 Yes, if not that as the reason then there seems to be something relevant left out of the story that could explain the families attitude.
@@glennrishton5679You do have to wonder about that. We usually only get one side. As it was told, though, it sounded like the right call to save the unconscious person who didn’t have a flotation device. I wish I could assume there had to be more to the story because people wouldn’t be so stupid as to think that choice was wrong, but we’ve all heard of families that are clueless.
@@glennrishton5679 Drowning is a silent killer. The sister was screaming and flailing, while the mom was unconscious and doing nothing. Likely the reason no one responded to the mom, was because no one paid attention or realized the mom was in trouble. Meanwhile, the sister was visibly and audibly in need of help, so she got all the attention. Realizing after the fact what was going on, the family should change their tune, but sometimes when you're so far up on your high horse, it hurts more to get down. As for the mom herself, probably prioritizing her daughter before herself. Parents tend to do that.
I agree with you Dabne. The sister was fine in a life vest. OP's mom was going to die if not rescued. Everyone except OP is wrong including their mom. WTF?
Keep in mind, the mom got mad at OP too. She is essentially being ungrateful that she was saved.
@@dracko158
They literally mentioned that, no need to remind them.
The family mad at OP for saving drowning mom, ask them every time "And what were you doing? Where were you?"
I applaud OP for rightly evaluating who needed immediate help despite their own fear.
They'll just get angry at him for "talking back to adults". They've already decided he's at fault for everything as the scapegoat. You can't argue with entitled idiots.
The ironic thing is that if OP had "saved" her sister first (who didn't need saving anyway) it's likely her mom would've died, and then the family would've still been mad at her for NOT saving her mother first. It's a damned if you do, damned if you don't situation.
Lake story: Rslash said it best. Sister had a life vest. She wasn’t in real danger. Mom had no life vest and was unconscious. She was in real and immediate danger. Now, playing devil’s advocate, a frightened child screaming and flailing is going to attract more attention than an unconscious woman who people from a distance may be unable to know is unconscious. I could understand that knee jerk reaction, but to maintain the stance of sister is more important after learning the facts puts them firmly in the wrong
The first one is literally the one asdfmovie skit:
“Come out with your hands up!”
“I’m gay!”
Story 4: OP’s family are idiots. The youngest was OK. She would just panicking because her mom passed out. And since there were several capable adults, I don’t see why OP needed to prioritize his sister when there were plenty of people that could go get her. Tell that ungrateful mom that next time you’ll just let her drown since that’s what she wanted.
Since everybody survived, they got the best possible outcome. What are they complaining about? At this point, remind them that they are complaining that the mother is still alive.
Story 1:OP you thought an adult intruder snuck into your home and was attacking your son. No one is going to call you a bad person for just trying to protect your family. Plus, it’s not like the boy was hurt.
Also you do need to talk to him about it, let him know that it’s fine if he’s gay and that you’re sorry if he’s scared his BF. But he can’t be sneaking him in like that. It gave you the wrong idea and terrified his sister.
That father is a bad person... for not IMMEDIATELY clearing things up with the child he just pointed a gun at and threatened. Instead he says nothing to him or his son, and decides to ask the internet? Damage is done. Irrevocably.
I say this, as a gay man who came out in extremely similar circumstances. That relationship (with father) was permanently damaged and will never recover. Some situations (such as a gun pointed in your face as a teen, by your father), never leave you.
@@gabrielr.5937 No!
If you allow some random teenager to sneak you into his home with a gun owning father, you're stupid (and horny)!
And your partner is an asshole (and horny)!
Seriously a 16 year old in the US should realise how stupid such an action was! And happy that he got away with his life!
@@gabrielr.5937at that moment I guarantee you neither of those kids would have heard anything there scared out of their minds anything OP says is going to go in 1 ear and out the other hes smart for waiting until his son calms down absolutely needs to talk to his son though
11:52- I only see a damned if you do, damned if you don't situation here. Backlash if mother, backlash if sister.
Ya the only response op should give is “why didn’t you help”
I think the entire reason they are taking it out on her is to simply deflect from their own inability to make decisions to help!!
@@IFBBProYeobig facts
Drowning story: If I was in OP’s shoes, I would’ve done the same as they did. They got a hold of the situation, judged that their sister was fine and their mother was in need of help, and SAVED THEIR MOTHER’S LIFE!
I 100% stand behind OP!
Story 4: OP chose to save the person in most immediate danger. Mom's life was in immediate risk, sister's was not. As an Eagle Scout with extensive water safety training THIS IS WHAT YOU DO. OP's emergency situation triage was flawless.
Since everybody survived, they got the best possible outcome. What are they complaining about? At this point, remind them that they are complaining that the mother is still alive.
Story 2:
OP: I'm so worried someone will find out!
Also OP: *Tells the entire internet
It's insane & infuriating how often a person begs their spouse for an "open relationship" because they've become attracted to someone else. But then gets angry & jealous if the spouse decides to also take part in that open relationship. I've been through it twice!
Fourth story: I would be so pissed if I was OP. I just saved your LIFE, and you're yelling at me because the one person who had a LIFE JACKET almost pissed their pants!? Its absurd. If I saved my mom and she did that, I'd tell her then I'd rather she drowned. Harsh, sure, but no one in the family is listening with the nice words. NTA 0/5
Last story: take the camera go to the police, have them check for any other cameras. Get a restraining order, even if it just temporary. Keep your parents away from you as much as possible. Your fiancé is sweet, but is very naïve to want to give them a second chance after being a camera in your apartment. Especially when their reasoning is beyond creepy, and they think they still have authority over you to come over and talk about why what they did was okay.
Mom over sister: I also don't understand OP's family, but maybe there's some weird "reflex" in some people to go for little kids first if they are in distress. Recently there was an accident when a kid in a lifejacket fell overboard on a lake and panicked. Both parents jumped to save her, but they couldn't swim and both drowned. They weren't wearing lifejackets. The kid was completely safe all the time, some random people fished her out.
Wow, these people were so fucking stupid, they even failed getting a Darwin Award for that..
My pessimistic side is coming out in the story where OP saves her mother. Well I guess you would have drowned then I would say if I were OP. My confusion is why was everyone else just standing. Are there dumbstruck? That story makes me mad for OP.
Why do I get the feeling that if op did save the little sister, the mom would have lost her life and then the family would blame op for that.
@@hollytheanimalcrossingfan That is my exact feeling too. I think OP should confront her family. I have a feeling that there is more than just “oh you should saved your whiny sister.”
@@Maria_Miciano_5Right? If they’re this hateful when everyone lived, imagine their reaction if someone had died! Also shame on that mom. A good parent might have preferred to die if a child was at risk but if your kid saves you in a crisis where adults are doing almost nothing, you should have understanding for the difficult position your kid was placed in. Your mom should at least have your back in this. It sucks that this kid saved their mom and that mom won’t even be grateful or stick up for them.
@@BeeWhistler Exactly! Now I’m wondering, I know some Reddit posts are fake. But this one would be kind of a weird one to post. I don’t know why I thought about it. But it is just a hunch on my part. The mom should be grateful but what do I know about being ungrateful for my life.
The drowning mom story, that whole family should go to family therapy. The 3 year old is traumatized probably mostly from seeing her mom feint and drowning in front of her, the 10 year old is traumatized from it too but tried to help with only OP taking him seriously, then also the parents taking it out on OP for prioritizing the mom over the sister who wasn’t in immediate danger
Wait- he's keeping his poopy pants as trophies??? WHO DOES THAT?
I doubt they're trophies. Probably shame and not wanting anyone to know so he holds onto them till he can get a chance to throw them out, but keeps forgetting
I say he's doing this as a disgusting control tactic.
The second story reminds me of something similar from a true crime story.
I don't remember the names but here's what happened:
The sister had a twin. Her BIL was married to her sister. They had 2 kids together. However her SIL hated her twin sister for whatever reason. And their relationship was bad.
Long story short, the SIL (BIL sister) shot her twin sister while she was pregnant. I think they were able to save the baby (I could be wrong), but the twin sister died from her injuries.
Her 4 year old son ran out and asked the neighbor to call the cops, saying,
"My aunt shot my mom."
The sister was there for the BIL and the whole trial. A year or two after her twin sister's death, the sister wound up with the brother in law.
The sister said this in an interview,
"At the time, we were both grieving and trying to stay strong for the kids. Over time we had a stronger friendship built over the grief and wound up falling for each other. Sometimes I wonder if my sister is okay with this, but knowing her, I'm pretty sure she's at ease knowing her husband and kids will be loved and protected always. I'm sure she's at peace with it."
As for the SIL who shot her twin sister, she's in prison without parole and her brother disowned her as of right now. When asked if he'll ever see her, he responded,
"Not right now. I can't forgive her. She killed my wife. While I still love my sister, I can't forgive her right now for what she did. Eventually if I do decide to see her, i want to know the truth of why she did it and why she took my wife away from everyone who loved her, including my kids. "
“I cant forgive her right now”
RIGHT NOW!? the fuck is wrong with this guy! If someone MURDERED my wife, there’s no coming back from that! Literally nothing!
@@realrealwarpet I think those were the words. It was either right now or not at all. I'll need to find the interview video to clarify. But yeah since then, the sister in law isn't allowed to see the kids and I don't think the brother has visited his sister since.
That is all kinds of messed up
1: OP reacting normally to a potential threat. Understandable.
2: OP is a victim of emotions and possibly of BIL. Either way, she shouldn't feel dirty or anything else, as it's not her fault.
3: Dude needs to see medical help.
4: Triage/prioritizing. Who can be saved and needs it the most urgently? Mom. OP made the right call. The rest of the family are just pissed because it meant they had to get off of their lazy rears and actually help.
5: OP should definitely file a police report. She should also have a chat with her fiance and get him to take her side with going NC with her parents. Maybe when they realize that they can and will lose full contact with their daughter, they'll agree to change their behavior towards her and her fiance. Especially when she points out that he's the reason she's even considered keeping any kind of contact with them.
2: I don’t even think she’s a victim. Or rather, they’re both victims in different ways. She doesn’t have anything to feel guilty about, death is hard. Grief is hard. At least he doesn’t seem to want her to replace her sister, I’ve seen that one before in these situations.
@@Janjones7735 I get the impression that he knew what he was doing. That and his being older means that he should have had more self control.
Wait the husband decided to be poly, but he was upset that OP found a bartender to hook up with... sounds like a personal problem
Sounds like he wanted to have his cake and eat it to.
I had to rewind and double check that part because I was confused lol. Especially when OP said “I know it was wrong” why is it wrong lol?
While you can still cheat in a poly relationship. This was her only partner. I see nothing wrong with what she did. Husband just wanted to cheat and his wife to stay home and got mad when she was getting attention while he was led on.
That's because the guy wasn't actually poly
Story 4: OP's family is crazy! The sister was wearing a life jacket, so she was not in immediate danger of drowning.
"How could you abandon your sister like that?"
"What? You mean 'thanks for saving my life'! I'm a hero!"
There should be laws requiring people to side with the hero, every time.
Since everybody survived, they got the best possible outcome. What are they complaining about? At this point, remind them that they are complaining that the mother is still alive.
"He said we shouldn't tell anyone about it & _I don't plan to_ " - except for right now, where I tell millions of strangers (& probably some people who know me) on the internet.
In the story with the near drowning, the family wanted the mom to drown, based on how they are treating the OP.
6:04 sounds like a crappy situation
You little turd😂😂😂
Girl you put it on Reddit, a ton of people have found out about your passionate hugging with your brother-in-law
Oh god this dude I knew in college, first and last time I ever went over to his place I saw the kitchen sink with a pile of shitty boxers soaking in bleach. The kitchen reeked like a combination of raw unflushed sewage and what must've been a whole jug of bleach. And he just walked right past it like it was nothing.
As someone with a weak stomach, that's a dealer breaker.
The first story can be salvaged with an apology, who knows, maybe in 30 years this'll be a hilarious story to tell the adopted grandchildren
Story 4: If I was in OPs shoes here, I'd be asking which one of them poisoned my mom or if it was a group effort. It feels suspicious that she just randomly fainted with no known cause, and everyone is angry that OP saved her. I know something so dramatic is probably not true, but at least I would hope the question would shut them up about it.
The water story. One of the key things we're taught in first aid, is help the quiet ones first. If they're noisy, they're breathing. NTA!
Saving an unconscious person is definitely more critical than saving a child who is wearing a life jacket! The unconscious person will drown quickly. An awake, alert, and flailing person in a life jacket will be okay for a lot longer. Hell, depending on the life jacket, the sister might not have been capable of drowning.
Mom over sister easy. The sister had a life jacket the mother didn't
Mom over sister: I wanna know OP’s age during the save. No matter the age, OP was in the right and the rest of the family did those kids wrong. But I still want to know the age of OP, because what age person are they abusing over SAVING SONEONE’S LIFE?
Story one.... OP did exactly right, defending his family and home. NTA. 😮
Mom vs. Sister story.... OP again did exactly right! Mom was DYING! Sis was not in immediate danger. All those Flying Monkeys are total AHs. Why were THEY doing NOTHING!? 😡
S1: As someone who had prior lifeguard and CPR training, what OP did was right. The mom who passed out while swimming was in more danger cause of a lack of flotation device, her safety comes first. If OP had saved his sister who had a life vest on, then his little brother would have been in Danger cause he was trying to keep mom afloat but was losing strength. It would have led to a tragic loss of two lives. OP needs to write them a letter saying what he did was the correct path and albeit give what would have happened if he went after the sister first then say he will not be contacting them for a while(no given date or time frame) and sincerely hopes that once they have gone through therapy and have had the time to process the events, they are free to reach out to him to discuss it in a neutral location of his choosing. He should further add that regardless if they choose to forgive him and themselves or continue to hate him, that he still and always love them.
Perhaps being served with a dish of reality might make them come around after they realize that they have no way to spit at him cause he ain't reaching out.
The Soiling Pants story: Coughing can evoke muscles to work that shouldn't. I've known people that puke, urinate or defecate themselves if they cough too hard. Anyone who has coughed with a full bladder and leaked a bit knows how this is. It's just something weird the body does when coughing sometimes. The husband was likely embarrassed about it and didn't want OP knowing, hence why he kept them (probably for later disposal but keeps getting caught before he fills the bag and gets rid of them or does the load of laundry himself alone). It's not exactly incontinence, just something that is triggered specifically by coughing and isn't his fault at all.
Story five: OP should visit the parents and sneak a nanny cam or two in. Let them feel violated and see if that changes their attitude. Also, ask them if they ever expect to hold a grandchild with that kind of thinking.
1st story, man this isnt on you, their sneaking around is what caused this, you thought it was a home intruder and by the noise being made you thought someone was hurting your son. Sit down with him and explain that and apologise, ask your son to invite his friend over so you can also apologise to him. Maybe here set up some ground rules, like no sneaking into the house in the middle of the night. Knock on the front door, he is welcome. Exactly how you would treat it if he was a girl sneaking into your sons room. Dont point out they are gay, its just the same as a hetero relationship. If you are uncomfortable with them having sex under your roof say so, thats within your rights, just treat them like the couple they are. You just want them to stop sneaking around. You can talk about their relationship, be supportive etc, just make sure its clear that the incident was a home intruder and fearing your son was in danger and the huge relief that he wasnt.
I agree with everything you said, except the first sentence. I would agree, if the father had stopped and explained everything immediately. By going to the internet and letting the boy run out, he's letting the two teens create their own narrative based on events. Based on events, and the father not talking to him for a while... damage is already done at this point.
Op's family is nuts. Its basic rescue procedure to help the person who is in the most danger first. The sister had a flotation device so she was in the least danger. The mom was passed out, drowning, and the brother could have drowned to trying to save his mother alone. So yeah this OP shouldnt worry about what their family says.
The sister wasn't in danger, she was just scared. she wasn't literally dying, THE MOM WAS.
Story 3: all I can think about is how bad that car must smell with those bags, especially in the summer.
I think the mom in the almost-drowning story might be somewhat in denial. Like, it's so much easier to insist "I was fine, your sister needed you" than to admit "you saved my life and this might happen again because no one knows what's going on". The mom is probably more scared than she's letting on. But the rest of the family don't have that excuse, even if they're scared that someone they love might be in serious danger. I've been the family in a situation where someone was in a medical emergency, and yeah, I didn't want to admit that my mom was probably dying (she did), but when the doctors needed me to make a godsdamned decision, I set aside my fear of losing her and made the best choice for her in that moment because that's what you HAVE to do. Honestly, I used to think I was bad in a crisis because I can get overly-emotional, but it genuinely feels like I have more sense than most people because I can minorly compartmentalize. Sure, I can't stop myself from crying, but I can say "you (pointing at a specific person at random who I'm confident has a phone) call 911, NOW" while crying, and can generally figure out priorities based on actual risk and not who's the most upset or the youngest or most vulnerable in general but not at this specific moment.
Drowning mom story weirds me out. You have 1 person active and 3 people who potentially could be in distress and needing help.
Drowning Mom, who is in most urgent need, AND with little kids, so it would be really great for her to not die...
Youngish son, who can swim, but can't save mom.
Very young daughter who is wearing a life jacket. Obviously panicking, but unless you're in the ocean (or her lifejacket is way too small to be useful) is in no actual danger.
Yeah, deal with the dying person first. Deal with the panicking person second. Anyone who disagrees is literally an imbecile.
Story about pants pooper: I’m the pants pooper in my family, but I’ve been radiated down there for rectal cancer. Control isn’t perfect, but after accidents things are washed or thrown away. Also wear Depends often.
Poop man story: I think you're asking the wrong question. If OP's husband has known for over 12 years that he has poop accidents when he coughs, why would he not wear adult diapers?
Keeping soiled clothing is pretty common for children & teens. They somehow think it's safer for them to hide it in their bedroom or car than to throw it out. I haven't heard of an adult doing that, but maybe?
If you want to go down a dark (but very improbable) path...Teen boys who are being SA'd will either refuse to wipe themselves or start having accidents. Maybe the hubby has repressed the memories and/or that happening caused OP's hubby to stop mentally and/or emotionally maturing.
More likely, his depression from his obsession caused him to be depressed enough that throwing them out felt like too much work.
Or, he has trophies from his fetish.
Or he's keeping them to show the stripper that he's so dedicated to showing her he loves her, that he's giving himself accidents (obsessions can be SUPER weird and nonsensical)
Last Story - Spying Parents
I have to admit, I'm a little disappointed in OP. While her parents needed to be confronted about the hidden camera in her apartment, she jumped the gun a bit.
This was a golden opportunity for low-comedy. If they want to make sure she's not having sex in her own home, that's just daring them to have the weirdest sex imaginable first, right in front of the camera.
...And I mean "WEIRD", like 6-foot party sub, a promiscuous armadillo, and sock puppets... lots and lots of sock puppets.
Why send them to court for a day when you can send them into therapy for the rest of their lives? And this would have been a boon to her relationship with her boyfriend, rather thana strain. The sexiest women in the world are those you can best describe with the term "Whimsically Mischievous"... imagining all that might have been just makes me sad for this couple.
I like the cut of your jib. Promiscuous armadillo, LOL
Mom over sister story: unfortunately OP is learning the hard way that his sister os the golden child who's comfort is more important than the lives of others, and he is the scapegoat who is somehow at fault for every single problem.
Gosh darn! That is one hell of a coming out story.
rslash saying “new reddit episodes” instead of “new reddit videos” in the outro literally changed the course of my day.
A lifeguard always goes for the person more in trouble. The mum was unconscious... So would have been picked first in that situation.
The sister was safe enough. The mom was actively drowning. Kid's got good instincts. Oughta be a combat medic.
Lake story:So her family would prefer the three of them lose their mother than her sister be uncomfortable for a little bit while she saved her mom’s life? Truly I would get angry. I’m sure OP is going through the guilt stage and I hope she goes to therapy to talk about her thought process when saving her mom and how her family failed to help in a emergency and then shamed her. I hope she takes what she feels and turns that into motivation to stick up for herself and do what she thinks is right in every situation. Imagine how hard it is for her to trust herself in emergencies now. Her family should feel ashamed of themselves but they don’t seem like the kind of people who take accountability.
The story where OP saved her mother sounded like a 'Damned if you do, damned if you don't' scenario. If she had saved the sister, they'd still be mad at her. Op is clearly a scapegoat and her family is mega toxic. OP, you did a good thing, don't beat yourself up.
Did everyone just miss the statement that after The Opie saved The Mother, even *The Mother* was angry at him?
_"Sorry mum, I should've just let you drownd."_
"You saved the wrong person!"
-People who did literally nothing
Since everybody survived, they got the best possible outcome. What are they complaining about? At this point, remind them that they are complaining that the mother is still alive.
@@javaman7199
Right? That's what I'd do.
@@javaman7199maybe secretly they wanted the mother to kick the bucket 🤣 would not be surprised if that was the case, she sounds insufferable for blaming OP too
"his entry points would be different every time" - RSLASH 9/7/2024
The son is a moron for having someone repetedly break into the house at night.
Repeatedly*
It's not technically breaking in, since he was invited. Teenagers sneaking in & out of houses is pretty common, unfortunately. Always has been.
He's a teenager trying to hide sex stuff. Of course he's a moron. lol
@@Richard_Nickersonthe rest of the family had no idea what was going on. For the daughter, it does appear some random dude is repeatedly break in for an unknown reason. For the dad to see what he saw, his reasoning for what he did is justified. Glad he asked questions first. The son was a horny moron.
The mom was the one in danger, I applaud OP for rescuing their mom since all the other adults were practicing their slack jawed gawker act.
The kid was in a life jacket! The mom was not!
It's rich that everyone is attacking Op for saving the one in immediate danger yet none of them bothered to jump into action until they saw Op going for the mom. I can only imagine the mom being upset due to not knowing the actual true series of events. With how nasty everyone is being, I wouldn't put it past them to conveniently leave out that the sister was safe in her floaters and not drowning. However, I do think it's most likely coming from a protective mother's pov of "save my baby first".
Mom over sister: when I heard the title of this one I was angry at OP. But the moment we got to "mom suddenly passed out" and "sister had on a swim vest" I was completely on OPs side.
The sister is conscious, moving, and not at risk of going under. She is not the immediate priority.
I'm not sure what's wrong with poopy pants, but that DOES sound like a medical condition to me. It's probably something he doesn't want to get checked out because he's too embarrassed.
story 4:
op did the smartest thing in the situation. save the person drowning. everyone else were safe already. you can panic all you want while strapped to a flotation device, you will not drown.
Brother-in-law giving passionate hugging advice to sister is a major red flag
Anyone who has done any kind of emergency training will know... always help the unconscious first. If they're screaming, they're alive. The three-year-old, despite being traumatised, was safe because she was in a life jacket. The mother was unconscious and slipping under the water.
Honestly, untrained friends and family in hysterics are the worst because they don't want people they don't know rescuing their loved ones and the like. During emergencies, you need cold logic... or perfectly correct instincts in this case.
4th story: Wow OP's family is ungrateful. Thanks to OP's actions, nobody died that day. OP had to make a call, and it was the right call.
MOS- mom was drowning and sister was in a life jacket. This family makes no sense at all. She should be mad at everyone else who wasnt rushing to the rescue not to the one person who did.
Since everybody survived, they got the best possible outcome. What are they complaining about? At this point, remind them that they are complaining that the mother is still alive.
I remember when I was at a theme park. Me, my mom, my sister, and my sister's boyfriend were walking toward a roller coaster. The path we took was blocked. I see my mom climbing over the rail to get to the other side that wasn't blocked off. I told her we could just walk around, but she was, in her words, "too lazy".
One of her legs fell through the gaps between the wooden rails, and she panicked.
I pulled her; she said I was hurting her. My sister and her boyfriend joined in, with the same result.
I tell the two of them to hold her while I go to the other side to push. They told me to keep pulling; I told them nothing was working and ran to the other side.
Either my mom decided to finally push herself up, or they got the right angle to pull her because as soon as I was on the other side, she was free.
She then gave me the silent treatment for "abandoning" her. As a teenager at the time, I felt bad but thinking back on it, this was her fault. Plus, the gap was so small, that you could squeeze a limb in there but not your body, so she was fine.
My cat took the most horrendous shit during the pants pooping story, so I got to not only hear the story, but smell it too.
Last story gave us a hint, they insult his culture..... it's just racism.
And/or it's them bashing the fiance for his religion. Based on the fact that they're obsessed with their daughter's 'purity', I'm willing to bet they're a very religious family, and a lot of extremists not only look down on other religions, but actually insinuate that any religion other than their own is evil
OP didn't "choose her mom" over her sister, she rescued the person that was actually in danger! Her sister had a life jacket on, she wasn't in danger! If she had waited to rescue her mom, the woman could have died! And for what? A child that wasn't in any danger?
Bro really said "I pooped my pants and now it's runny I go unt unt you think that's funny"
I miss fresh, bumfris, and cuestar, but that doesn't mean I don't love waking up and getting ready to an Rslash video. I've subbed pre the Illuminaughty bs and always knew she was sus. I hope you're family is doing well.
OMG I FORGOT AVOUT FRESH
Op saving his drowning mom first is the right decision. Sis had a life jacket, mom was actively dying. Your family is wrong.
Honestly op made the correct decision. The mom was unconscious and unable to keep herself afloat. The kid had a life vest. If you can stay afloat, you're more likely to survive longer than if you can't
Omg the drowning story. OP if you see this, I promise you that you 100% did the correct thing. Your sister had a life jacket on, your mom did not and was about to die.
If you love anywhere near Ohio, you can be a part of my family. We are all kind and love each other. Its rare I know, but true.
every water safety class i've taken would have you go to the mom first, on top of that they would have you not go to the sister unless she falls unconscious, someone who is struggling and panicking is likely to push you under, because they are no longer in control, that flailing is a reflex that doesn't care if you're the president of the united states, it will grab you, recognize something in the water that floats, and tries to climb on top, someone who is panicking is to be handled by a trained professional, or tossed something they can hold onto to keep them afloat
Story 4: Jeez, this one is frustrating to hear. Honestly, if pushed to the point of no contact, I genuinely would've been the kind of person to look my mom in the eye and say "I should've helped my sister and left you." That response would genuinely shake her and drive the point home
Idk why but i want to hear an update about the life jacket story. Have op confront their family on their thought process. Though in a wise way of course
13:28 I went to look and sadly the story was removed and Op's account was suspended so there's no update but I really hope the family pulls their heads out of there assses. THE MOTHER WAS DROWNING!! and it all happened so fast so op was just running and acting and knew her sis had a life jacket! I really hope op knows they did the right thing and that things will maybe turn around.
The mom over sister story, I would’ve done the same thing op did. Especially considering while op tended to the mother who was literally drowning, there were other family members who could have rushed to help either the sister or the mom. Apparently none of the family did that until things escalated. Op absolutely did the right thing.
Story 2: I’m going to try and believe that the guy made a mistake out of unprocessed grieve, and didn’t really think about what he was doing. OP needs to take some time away from this guy who knew her since she was a child. Also if it’s bothering her that much even if she doesn’t feel comfortable telling her parents, I think she does need to talk to someone about it.
I would be checking to make sure they don't have a life insurance policy on your mom that pays out to them. That would be right there all the explanation needed
2nd story: People are so stupid. “It was so wrong”…”I feel so dirty…”
Please.
It's not even like there was cheating involved. The guy's a widow. It sounded consensual (although I am concerned that she just sorta... Went limp? That's not right) and they're both single. All is good as far as I can see
Devil's Advocate: Save the mother first. The mother can provide, the child cannot. Not sure if there's a dad in the family, but if there's not, saving the child will make them orphans.
As a person in the medical field, A life saver, people who are drowning do not flail and splash about like in the movies. They just sink below. The others were in life jackets and flailing and splashing so not drowning. It was a Triage situation and OP correctly evaluated the situation and saved mom from drowning first. The family are completely ignorant and uneducated about crisis situations and water crisis situations. Well done OP. If you didn't do the correct thing this would be a story about a mom passing away because no one knew better.
Mom over sister: i saw the comments saying 'flotation device' and thought like, water wings. Still, unconscious vs conscious, etc.
But no, OP says life jacket. Good grief, yeah the sister is going to stay above the water for the short amount of time needed, almost like that was probably the logic behind putting her in one to begin with.
The little sister is probably terrified of water at the moment because every other family member acted and is still acting like she was about to visit Davy Jones' locker while her brother is screaming and her mom just went under the water
Story 4: I think the mother was mad because (good) parents would rather have their children safe than themselves safe. Also flailing baby is probably more noticeable, so the family was focused on her. Doesn’t mean they shouldn’t have helped, though.
True, many parents would rather die than let their child die. But OP is not a parent. He has a much deeper bond with his mother than his baby sister. It's expected honestly, so his family should have been more understanding.
Ya saving an activly drowning person is way more important than someone with a flotation device.
The only thing i can think is that the sister was also in some lesser danger. At 3 i doubt they bought a perfectly fitting life jacket so she probably was bobbing and getting water in her nose and mouth, just not to a dangerous extent. The fact shes terrified of water and started flailing at all tells me she probably did have something happen.
OP still did make the correct decision. Unfortunatly OP is going to have to live with this bs harrassment even from her own mom.