Yeah it’s kind of messed up to do that to a person especially if you got married, I’d probably see if I couldn’t find the recipes for the wedding costs and ask to be paid back for that. Which if she complains she always had the option of saying “NO”.
@@willtannerborja2189 You need to get a life. People listen to these stories and respond. that's how this works. how long ago it happened DOESN'T MATTER. You don't need to trawl the comment section and be a jerk to everyone you disagree with. just shut up and let people have their own opinions
@@willtannerborja2189 She cheated on him. It doesn't matter that it was with a woman, she cheated on him, plain and simple. And OP is devastated but is somehow trying to explain it away as OK because she was really gay all along. When in reality, she was really a cheater all along.
OP in the first story is stupid. Your wife lied with you for years, went into the relationship knowing she never liked you the same way you do. Lied to you for YEARS. AND Cheated on you multiple times with the same person. Why is he being so nice? She didn’t care for his feelings or feel bad for him one bit.
(F* off, RUclips!) Story 1: Do not let her stay there, and do not protect her. Out her to everyone. She used OP for years. Not cool. OP needs to stop being a wimp.
Like bro is seriously trying to play white knight for his wife who cheated and lied to you for pretty much your entire marriage and used you for her own selfish gains, just because she’s coming out of the closet
Op is trying to downplay his own emotions. I do hope his therapist can help him out and bring it to light. But I feel like his ex wife is a ahole and might be gaslighting him.
Story 2 reminds me of that crazy woman who wanted to name the kid she had with OP after her dead ex. Neither of the partners in these stories really loved the OPs, they just keep them around for convenience/ to get something from them
@@NoshiNoah exactly, they only want to see a op more upset and everything because that would make it more entertaining for them. It is really messed up huh? Gee this is a person who he has strong feelings for and came forward about being a lesbian on her own, yes she should have told him sooner bit people open up about this at there own pace and probably had a lot of built up inside homophobia.
I don't think she cared about him and wasted years of his life, however I think he was wise to remain calm and separate completely without complications. ... And she was more than a friend.
Story 1 sinopsis of the story Another doormat that bites the dust. Story 2 why do people dont work on themselves after a tragedy. Its been 10 years its enough time for him to move on
True, taking a calm approach to this is not "loosing a spine" it's called being an adult, and people should know that other people do divorce differently, especially if it was TWO YEARS OF MARRIAGE. The contrast between Reddit and RUclips comments is outstanding
Why would or should he feel guilt for throwing out and then divorcing hus cheating wife If he can't afford to live alone, rent out the extra room to a lodger
@@Olimar92empathy us for those who deserve it. People who use others for several years and keep massive life changing secrets or stuff about who they are do not deserve empathy
Bro should've went scorched earth. I had some similar shit happen to me but thank god me and my ex never got married. Most of her family are homophobic as well. Outed both her and the AP for that one.
It’s adorable when 30yr olds talk about their lives as mid-life, or the age at which they will have already peaked. Then they can just flow for another 50-60 years until they actually die.
@@willtannerborja2189 his wife used him, cheated and wasted 4/5 year of his life I would only show love and compassion AFTER I divorced her and threw her our of my home
They did do the Divorce ASAP. They just decided they would be better off not trying to be assholes to one another for no reason. No Lawyers, just two people that wanted to leave things without being the asshole.
1st storey this man is a better man than me she lied for years wasting his time, time where he could have spent looking for a wife that's not a lesbian that's f up, Time is the most important thing in once life,this man is a doormat.
I will say this until you voice runs dry: YOUR SEXUAL PREFERENCES ARE NOT A LICENSE FOR YOU TO CHEAT AND LIE TO YOUR PARTNER!! As controversial as this is gonna sound, oop should've outed her. Unless her parents have threatened physical harm or death, there was no reason for oop to help her keep her secret. He definitely shouldn't be acting so favorably towards her, because she'll likely try this shit again woth another poor sucker. I myself am asexual, but I would never hide my truth to trap someone into a loveless marriage.
Did you not get to the end where the Ex-wife is still dating her girlfriend? I feel you missed the part where the lesbian couple is still together and open. At least to the point the Ex's Mother still isn't aware.
Okay I decided to wait for the full post to give the commenters the benefit of the doubt. Yall need to get your anger in check. Op is a better man than many of you. Many of you likely commented before the info that this was in 2014. That greatly changed the issue. In 2024, yeah a beard might be unecessary. But in 2014, this was a wildly different story. As OP said, what was the benefit of outting and being angry? Im actually ashamed of some of yall.
No but actually, OP himself said that he could scream, break things, and lash out but he doesn’t see where it’d get him in the long run because it wouldn’t help him or change anything. It’s almost like the concept that people being able to solve and get through troubling situations in life in a healthy, calm, and level headed manner is impossible for them to understand or something.
My dude, she kept this guy in relationship limbo. I would give her more grace if she was in the same boat as him but no, she was creating her own life at the expense of someone else's because she was too much of a coward. I'm not saying this guy shouldve nuked her life and I respect him for moving on, however it's a bit much to be like "I guess we were better off as friends."
@rorrim0 easy to say nowadays with how more accepting we are of homosexuality. But this woman became an adult on the 2000s. In a highly conservative and likely religious household. This story is told in 2014, around the time when homosexuality was becoming way more accepted. Should she have been open and not married? Sure. But let's not pretend it's just that easy. The point of my comment and as you pointed out, is that many people in the comments wanted nuclear hellfire upon this woman. This "cheater". That Op is a wimp. A doormat. A weakling. My comment was about how OP was way better than many of us and correctly identified that his best course of action was a calm and quick resolution. Hell, they went for breakfast after divorce. If that's not a sign of maturity I honestly don't know what is anymore.
@@austinfowler2707 I'm not saying she should've opened up, I'm saying she shouldn't have married under false pretense's. I'm saying that it was wrong to keep this guy in a relationship she wasn't committed to while at the same time she was moving her life forward with a different relationship at the expense of putting this guy on hold. She didn't have to do that and it was immoral for her to do so.
This comment section really shows how people can't comprehend that MAYBE people are caring, even to cheating exes. These people really are shameful. The commenters are the one who needs to grow a spine and a pair, not OP.
People are allowed to have their opinions, and not everyone needs to be nice and a pushover to everyone. She lied to him, wasted 2 years of his life, made him pay for a wedding that was all a sham that he could have put into a wedding with someone who ACTUALLY loved him, took advantage of all of his love, care and support. Most people wouldn't be so nice, and that's a normal reaction to basically being lied to and used for 2 years. You have no place to criticize other people when what she did is also pretty heavily frowned on even among the LGBTQ+ community. It's not fair to the person being used as a beard, it's manipulation, and it's not ok. It is perfectly normal for people to look at this, and look at OP's reaction as spineless. Most people would be furious in the same situation. You going into the comments and attacking people for reasonable, normal opinions is entirely undeserved and frankly incredibly rude. Nobody is obligated to be so nice to someone who has treated them so badly, and acting like it's spineless and those who don't see it your way need to grow a pair just tells me that YOU need to grow up and learn how the world works.
@@raeishimura Your comment could be flipped in both directions. The man ended up happy with his decision. And they are attacking the person for his actions, his choice wasn't spineless. It was the most rational decision for him. It's completely fair for those people to say their own opinions, but at the same time they are insulting someone for a decision that they ended up being happy with. Is she in the wrong? Yes. Could he have done more? Absolutely. Why didn't he? Because he didn't see a purpose in hurting her, and he chose to be a much better person than she was. Even if he had good reason to kick her to the curb. He's not spineless, he's reasonable and fair.
@@raeishimura The guy divorced as soon as he could, and they went their separate ways. The guy was ready to kill himself, and likely took on this "spineless" attitude to be more positive and not end up in the dirt before his ex became his ex. Everyone wanted him to be furious, to throw her out right when she said it and to go on a Social Media Crusade to out her. They want him to be the royal asshole they would be, and make her life a living hell. They divorced real quick after the whole thing, went through the legal process, and parted ways. No one has to be a raging dick. I also fail to see how he's a pushover. His ex didn't demand anything, and it seems they had a good relationship outside of a few issues. His wife spent years living with a Religious Trauma of a Homophobic Christian Mother.
First story is so fucking fake. "I'm a super hot rich guy and everyone loves me, my life is so good and I'm so perfect I can't even be bothered feeling bad, who cares that my wife has been abusing me for years!"
I love this commenter, they must have ignored 60% of the population to think that divorce=angry man with raaaggggggeeee, they must be the 40% who thinks violence and revenge is always the answer
@@NoshiNoah I love this commenter, has no respect for the fact others are allowed their own opinions and decides they need to trawl the comment section being a giant asshole to anyone who doesn't agree with their point of view.
How disgusting when people lime her use others as their beard.
Yeah it’s kind of messed up to do that to a person especially if you got married, I’d probably see if I couldn’t find the recipes for the wedding costs and ask to be paid back for that. Which if she complains she always had the option of saying “NO”.
You should be able to sue people for this. Emotional distress and fraud comes to mind.
Meh he’s such a wimp I can’t feel bad for him
OP needs to grow a pair.
Shoukd have kicked her out and put her on blast for being a cheater.
You need to get a life
Should've left his life be instead of ranging at his TEN YEAR OLD ACTIONS
@@willtannerborja2189 You need to get a life. People listen to these stories and respond. that's how this works. how long ago it happened DOESN'T MATTER. You don't need to trawl the comment section and be a jerk to everyone you disagree with. just shut up and let people have their own opinions
@@willtannerborja2189 She cheated on him. It doesn't matter that it was with a woman, she cheated on him, plain and simple.
And OP is devastated but is somehow trying to explain it away as OK because she was really gay all along. When in reality, she was really a cheater all along.
OP in the first story is stupid. Your wife lied with you for years, went into the relationship knowing she never liked you the same way you do. Lied to you for YEARS. AND Cheated on you multiple times with the same person. Why is he being so nice? She didn’t care for his feelings or feel bad for him one bit.
Probably because the wife slept with another woman and not a man
💯👍🏿
He at least remained calm and didn't do anything rash.
First off, he's a civil man unlike you. Second, this was 10 years ago, it's done and gone.
@@willtannerborja2189still a wimp.
Weird that the wife searched outside of her marriage since the op clearly isn’t a man.
He might still have a shot
(F* off, RUclips!) Story 1: Do not let her stay there, and do not protect her. Out her to everyone. She used OP for years. Not cool. OP needs to stop being a wimp.
Like bro is seriously trying to play white knight for his wife who cheated and lied to you for pretty much your entire marriage and used you for her own selfish gains, just because she’s coming out of the closet
At least he didn't act stupid and blow up on her, she could have used that. This way there's no alimony and he never has to interact with her again.
@@georgeprchal3924he could have skewered her in the divorce as she cheated and he could have said the wedding was a fraud
OP's kind of a pushover
Kind of? He is a full on pushover. This is scorched earth territory
@@MikeSVZ okay child
@@MikeSVZexactly I'm not one to stay calm when someone I loved used me
@@MikeSVZ yall really think humans are black and white and it shows how young all of you actually are.
@classicrockkid345 it is black and white when it comes to whether you're a doormat or not, you either are or you aren't and this guy simply is
Op is trying to downplay his own emotions. I do hope his therapist can help him out and bring it to light. But I feel like his ex wife is a ahole and might be gaslighting him.
Story one has serious friend vibes and you never knew she was a lesbian
Story 1: Grow a pair. File for divorce and kick her out.
Story 2 reminds me of that crazy woman who wanted to name the kid she had with OP after her dead ex. Neither of the partners in these stories really loved the OPs, they just keep them around for convenience/ to get something from them
wow. i hate people who uses others. he wasted years
s1 My wife used me as cover for four years, cheating on me the entire time and I'm okay with that.
OP is a fine example of a spineless pushover without balls
This commenter is a fine example of never fucking growing up
@@NoshiNoah And you are a fine example of needless rudeness and immaturity. People are allowed their opinions. get lost.
@NoshiNoah you sir are a fine example of a doormat. The mentality you imply OP should have leads to drawn out divorces and being taken advantage of
@@NoshiNoah exactly, they only want to see a op more upset and everything because that would make it more entertaining for them. It is really messed up huh?
Gee this is a person who he has strong feelings for and came forward about being a lesbian on her own, yes she should have told him sooner bit people open up about this at there own pace and probably had a lot of built up inside homophobia.
I don't think she cared about him and wasted years of his life, however I think he was wise to remain calm and separate completely without complications.
...
And she was more than a friend.
This could have been a fairly easy annulment I believe, based on fraud. Less messy than a divorce and usually faster. But whatever.
Story 1 sinopsis of the story
Another doormat that bites the dust. Story 2 why do people dont work on themselves after a tragedy. Its been 10 years its enough time for him to move on
I hate passive people like op in story 1
I hate people like this commenter
To all the people hating on OP, he made his decision, whats done is done at least he can be guilt free about not kicking her to the curb
True, taking a calm approach to this is not "loosing a spine" it's called being an adult, and people should know that other people do divorce differently, especially if it was TWO YEARS OF MARRIAGE. The contrast between Reddit and RUclips comments is outstanding
Why would or should he feel guilt for throwing out and then divorcing hus cheating wife
If he can't afford to live alone, rent out the extra room to a lodger
@@lilykhandker6716 Because he's an empathetic person.
@@Olimar92empathy us for those who deserve it. People who use others for several years and keep massive life changing secrets or stuff about who they are do not deserve empathy
Bro should've went scorched earth. I had some similar shit happen to me but thank god me and my ex never got married. Most of her family are homophobic as well. Outed both her and the AP for that one.
It’s adorable when 30yr olds talk about their lives as mid-life, or the age at which they will have already peaked. Then they can just flow for another 50-60 years until they actually die.
Agree OP is stupid
His stbe should not be a factor on any of his decisions
He should have just started divorce proceedings immediately
💯👍🏿
OP has a heart and actually cares for people unlike you
@@willtannerborja2189 his wife used him, cheated and wasted 4/5 year of his life
I would only show love and compassion AFTER I divorced her and threw her our of my home
@@willtannerborja2189too bad he has no balls to go with it
They did do the Divorce ASAP. They just decided they would be better off not trying to be assholes to one another for no reason. No Lawyers, just two people that wanted to leave things without being the asshole.
He isn't ready for a relationship, Nta
1st storey this man is a better man than me she lied for years wasting his time, time where he could have spent looking for a wife that's not a lesbian that's f up, Time is the most important thing in once life,this man is a doormat.
I will say this until you voice runs dry: YOUR SEXUAL PREFERENCES ARE NOT A LICENSE FOR YOU TO CHEAT AND LIE TO YOUR PARTNER!! As controversial as this is gonna sound, oop should've outed her. Unless her parents have threatened physical harm or death, there was no reason for oop to help her keep her secret. He definitely shouldn't be acting so favorably towards her, because she'll likely try this shit again woth another poor sucker. I myself am asexual, but I would never hide my truth to trap someone into a loveless marriage.
Did you not get to the end where the Ex-wife is still dating her girlfriend? I feel you missed the part where the lesbian couple is still together and open. At least to the point the Ex's Mother still isn't aware.
These FadsHave Made the Society hell for Normal peoples
"Gay since 8"
Okay I decided to wait for the full post to give the commenters the benefit of the doubt.
Yall need to get your anger in check.
Op is a better man than many of you. Many of you likely commented before the info that this was in 2014.
That greatly changed the issue. In 2024, yeah a beard might be unecessary. But in 2014, this was a wildly different story.
As OP said, what was the benefit of outting and being angry? Im actually ashamed of some of yall.
No but actually, OP himself said that he could scream, break things, and lash out but he doesn’t see where it’d get him in the long run because it wouldn’t help him or change anything. It’s almost like the concept that people being able to solve and get through troubling situations in life in a healthy, calm, and level headed manner is impossible for them to understand or something.
My dude, she kept this guy in relationship limbo. I would give her more grace if she was in the same boat as him but no, she was creating her own life at the expense of someone else's because she was too much of a coward.
I'm not saying this guy shouldve nuked her life and I respect him for moving on, however it's a bit much to be like "I guess we were better off as friends."
@rorrim0 easy to say nowadays with how more accepting we are of homosexuality.
But this woman became an adult on the 2000s. In a highly conservative and likely religious household.
This story is told in 2014, around the time when homosexuality was becoming way more accepted.
Should she have been open and not married? Sure. But let's not pretend it's just that easy.
The point of my comment and as you pointed out, is that many people in the comments wanted nuclear hellfire upon this woman. This "cheater". That Op is a wimp. A doormat. A weakling.
My comment was about how OP was way better than many of us and correctly identified that his best course of action was a calm and quick resolution.
Hell, they went for breakfast after divorce. If that's not a sign of maturity I honestly don't know what is anymore.
@@austinfowler2707 I'm not saying she should've opened up, I'm saying she shouldn't have married under false pretense's.
I'm saying that it was wrong to keep this guy in a relationship she wasn't committed to while at the same time she was moving her life forward with a different relationship at the expense of putting this guy on hold.
She didn't have to do that and it was immoral for her to do so.
@@rorrim0 She only started dating at the tail end of their marriage. She didn't create her own life until after they started the Divorce.
OP in story 1 is just so nice
He's too nice. Must be Canadian.
To his own detriment
Op should.go into comedy cause he's an absolute clown.
Grow a spine dude.
Get a life dude
@@willtannerborja2189 Why don't you, jerk?
Imagine hanging out with someone that literally used you for a idiotic reason
Don't attend the ceremony I doubt anyone will notice. You are only a place-keeper.
Why is she looking outside her wedding.
Clearly op still has a chance since that’s no man
This comment section really shows how people can't comprehend that MAYBE people are caring, even to cheating exes. These people really are shameful.
The commenters are the one who needs to grow a spine and a pair, not OP.
People are allowed to have their opinions, and not everyone needs to be nice and a pushover to everyone. She lied to him, wasted 2 years of his life, made him pay for a wedding that was all a sham that he could have put into a wedding with someone who ACTUALLY loved him, took advantage of all of his love, care and support. Most people wouldn't be so nice, and that's a normal reaction to basically being lied to and used for 2 years. You have no place to criticize other people when what she did is also pretty heavily frowned on even among the LGBTQ+ community. It's not fair to the person being used as a beard, it's manipulation, and it's not ok. It is perfectly normal for people to look at this, and look at OP's reaction as spineless. Most people would be furious in the same situation. You going into the comments and attacking people for reasonable, normal opinions is entirely undeserved and frankly incredibly rude. Nobody is obligated to be so nice to someone who has treated them so badly, and acting like it's spineless and those who don't see it your way need to grow a pair just tells me that YOU need to grow up and learn how the world works.
@@raeishimura Your comment could be flipped in both directions. The man ended up happy with his decision. And they are attacking the person for his actions, his choice wasn't spineless. It was the most rational decision for him.
It's completely fair for those people to say their own opinions, but at the same time they are insulting someone for a decision that they ended up being happy with.
Is she in the wrong? Yes. Could he have done more? Absolutely. Why didn't he? Because he didn't see a purpose in hurting her, and he chose to be a much better person than she was. Even if he had good reason to kick her to the curb. He's not spineless, he's reasonable and fair.
@@raeishimura The guy divorced as soon as he could, and they went their separate ways. The guy was ready to kill himself, and likely took on this "spineless" attitude to be more positive and not end up in the dirt before his ex became his ex.
Everyone wanted him to be furious, to throw her out right when she said it and to go on a Social Media Crusade to out her. They want him to be the royal asshole they would be, and make her life a living hell.
They divorced real quick after the whole thing, went through the legal process, and parted ways. No one has to be a raging dick.
I also fail to see how he's a pushover. His ex didn't demand anything, and it seems they had a good relationship outside of a few issues. His wife spent years living with a Religious Trauma of a Homophobic Christian Mother.
First story is so fucking fake. "I'm a super hot rich guy and everyone loves me, my life is so good and I'm so perfect I can't even be bothered feeling bad, who cares that my wife has been abusing me for years!"
You think so?
I love living in the 21st century first story was sooooo fake, not only would i sue her for the fake marriage but her girlfriend aswell
Soft ah boy
Dude I love this first story man must have ignored 99.999999999999% of people on Reddit to keep being such a push over idiot
I love this commenter, they must have ignored 60% of the population to think that divorce=angry man with raaaggggggeeee, they must be the 40% who thinks violence and revenge is always the answer
@@NoshiNoah I love this commenter, has no respect for the fact others are allowed their own opinions and decides they need to trawl the comment section being a giant asshole to anyone who doesn't agree with their point of view.