AS a dentist, I see many people who come in ashamed of their teeth. But I learn a long time ago that bad teeth do not equal bad people. And if you are in my chair now, you are on the right track, and should be commended not shamed. There is no point worry about what you did or didn't do before now, we can't change that, but what we can do is work on a plan to get you in the best shape we can moving forward.
Yeah I didn't go to a dentist for most of my adult life partly because of cost and partly because I was never in the habit of it to begin with. So one thing I was apprehensive about was getting a lecture from the dentist on the state of my teeth (very very very bad). But one of my front teeth broke recently and then that was the kick in the pants that I needed. Partly because I have a family member who keeps nagging at me to go to the dentist, and I do resent that because I'm an adult and it's not her business but I just didn't want to hear it from her so as soon as that tooth broke I called a dentist and made an appointment. Just so that if my family member started lecturing me again that I could tell her I am going to see the dentist lol
OMG, I am only just putting this together now at the age of 45. I have had struggles taking care of my teeth my entire life and I have just started going through the diagnosis for ADHD this year, but this video is the first time I have put these things together. Then this comment about being shamed at the dentist. This is one more barrier that I have had and never realised it. I'd eventually get my act together long enough to get to an appointment and every dentist I have had has shamed me about my teeth. Then I'd only make it to one or two appointments before I couldn't face them again and there'd be another 4, 5, 6 + years before I'd be able to get myself to search for another dentist. Not sure how I deal with it, but I wish you were my dentist. You sound amazing.
I have had great dentists who share your opinion. Unfortunately, dentists are also people... which means that some of them are... not so understanding. When one is suffering severe pain from teeth that need to be removed, being a condescending snit and telling me that I'll "be in dentures by the time you're 35"... is not going to encourage me to make regular appointments. (Incidentally, he was also wrong. I was over 50, and later learned there were additional medical issues involved - Sjogren's.) Thankfully, that was one of only two terrible dentists in my life, and the other one I only had to deal with once as an emergency measure.
For the sensory issues at the actual dentist, ask them if you can wear the lead vest the whole time. It is the BEST weighted blanket ever. It helps me so much!
As a dental assistant with ADHD MDD and anxiety I am so freaking proud of you for talking about this. It is hard to take care of your teeth when you are just trying to hold yourself together! I often have patients tell me they are scared when they come in and I say “that’s perfectly reasonable! Most people are, but you don’t have anything to be afraid of here. We are going to make this as comfortable as possible”. We let our patients make payments as big or small as they need to because we just want them comfortable. On my really bad weeks or months it is hard for me to take care of my teeth, but I have been lucky enough to have 2 years of education to learn what can happen along accommodations I can give myself to keep them healthy. Not everyone is so lucky and I know that, that’s why I try to educate people gently and with compassion. Again I’m so proud of you for talking about this
this might be the most important and helpful video to me on your channel. this is one of the hardest and most shameful things about my ADHD and it’s so relieving to know that other people struggle with this
I was so reluctant to even tell my therapist about my dental issues because of the shame I felt. It was such a relief to hear from her that it was actually a super common problem among adhders and I wasn’t her only client who struggled with that.
@@adhdcentral I reported your hundreds of spam messages and your channel for this behaviour. Don't hide behind the good intent of your spam messages, you are just seeking attention whilst adding nothing to the personal stories that are told by people. I suggest you stop this behaviour.
I'm a hygienist with ADHD and it's really helpful in having so much empathy for everyone not just neurodivergent people, I always say the past doesn't matter, you are here and you are doing something now that matters. It also gives me good perspective for strategies to help people with their oral health routine
I just had another round of finding out I need another $1000 of dental work so this is so appreciated. I feel the exact same way, and I’m always so ashamed to go to the dentist. Luckily my dentist is very accepting and supportive, so it does help but I’ve also been feeling so frustrated and hopeless about my dental health. Thank you for sharing and making me feel seen.
In the same boat - I started getting fillings last year but then a few unexpected expenses in a row and I’m halfway thru the bare minimum work done and not sure when I’ll be able to start again, and also got the RSD due to suddenly stopping halfway thru the treatment plan :/
This is so relatable! I never made the connection between my ADHD and poor dental hygiene habits. It is so frustrating to know you should be doing better or more and you’re just not doing it, over and over again. Thanks for sharing!
Me neither! I feel like it is so easy for me to get off track with taking care of my teeth. We used to go to a dentist when I was younger that was so awful about pushing expensive treatments on my family. I have had better times with other dentists after but yeah it can be difficult to complain about the taste of toothpaste or explain the tiredness at the end of the day. I've had so many things to try and remember to be a good adult and I just want to sleep. T he last thing I want to do is put minty fresh stuff on my teeth. These have been such great tips and it's just so nice that Jessica had been brave enough to talk about this cause I certainly have felt this shame too...
As a brain starting dental hygiene school this fall I’m glad you’re opening up about this specifically for adhd- it’s so important to know you’re not alone 💕 That’s what I love about this community 💝💝 Here’s some (..a lot of) tips that have helped me and others: • you don’t have to stay on one place (ex the bathroom) to brush/floss, moving from room to room IS allowed and more stimulating • something > nothing, if you’re so tired/overwhelmed you know you won’t brush your teeth that night- brush for less time or just mouthwash. It won’t clean your teeth but it will help to protect them a little and that counts for something! • play a video/song while you brush to time/motivate you • if you tend to forget, keep your toothbrush in an open, clean area where you’ll see it • if sensory issues are stopping you (depending on severity) reward yourself for doing hard things and find ways to make it easier like using yummy kids toothpaste instead of adult ones - don’t be too scared to talk to your hygienist about it they might have tips to help (or know someone who does) • have a pre/post/during dental visit ritual that helps keep you calm/motivated. Things like headphones, fidgets, comfy clothes, playing your favorite show/song help a lot. Don’t be afraid to tell the dental crew you’re nervous- trust me you’re far from alone and that small social support could help. • the best toothbrush/anything is the one you’ll actually use. Example: you always forget to charge the electric or have sensory sensitivity to it don’t feel forced to use something that’s not you-friendly. It’s job is to work for you, not the other way around.
I’ve habitually already done some of these (I pace from room to room or fidget with my other hand while brushing/flossing, and definitely prefer the “yummy kid’s toothpaste” + toothbrush I don’t have to charge, but I may as well try the others too. I agree with this comment and its definitely helpful, and I’d like to add to the list, but due to working memory problems I’ll think of it in a couple hours. Odds are I will be unable to add to the list as I’d have to find this video again when/if I do remember what I wanted to put here. Its on the tip of my tongue, but unfortunately its lost. PSA: Everybody reading this comment, go brush/floss while you’re thinking about it.
Ah, I finally remembered! Way sooner than I thought. You can get flavored/colored floss picks if it helps motivate any brains to floss. There’s probably something else I forgot, but at least its something
That's good, also don't forget about the autistic community, if you get good with our teeth and providing us with service that's tolerable, you'll likely never want for business. It's complete BS that dentists are allowed to get away with bullying and blaming patients in cases where the advice isn't working without bothering to look at other explanations other than insufficient brushing and flossing.
@@SmallSpoonBrigade yeah definitely - I’ve noticed a lot of neurodivergencies and mental illnesses aren’t taken into account other than for medication purposes. SO many people could be much healthier if we listened to what was bothering them instead of deciding they aren’t “trying hard enough”.
Oh, you are not alone in this! I haven't seen a dentist for probably a decade. I moved to a new city a year ago and finally picked a dentist and got an appointment scheduled. I'm not only fighting with my ADHD, but chronic migraines, depression, anxiety, panic attacks, and PTSD. Dental care is often so far down my list of things I give a rat's patootie about! But I'm trying to make the changes I need to. It's a process.
I am currently dealing with exactly the same dental issues and have had a "Make Dentist Appointment" alarm going off weekly in my phone for the last 2 years. As an adult, I often struggle to understand why it's so hard for me to be consistent with and/or give value to my own self-care. Thank you for speaking so openly about your own experiences and sharing the tips & tricks you've discovered along the way to help navigate the long, bumpy, and expensive road that is ADHD. Your channel has helped me realize I'm not broken, and am not failing at life.
You're doing your best and that's enough! Life is tough sometimes. You'll get to your dentist appointment when you're able. Maybe someone could help you book an appointment if you'd like to prioritise this more but don't have the capacity right now? You could perhaps ask a friend or family member?
If floss hurts your fingers but you don't want to use a bunch of disposable picks, there is a tool called Quip that grabs and holds the floss for you, and also comes with a portable case with a little mirror. There are a bunch of other non-disposable floss holders online, as well.
Thank you for mentioning that. It seems so obvious that someone must have thought of a sustainable solution to the floss-hurting-fingers-issue, but it somehow never crossed my mind to actually look for such a solution. 🤯 Wow!
I'm sooo grateful for this video! I've experienced real difficulty with this as well, mainly since I got old enough to be responsible for my dental hygiene. I've been thinking a lot lately about how I really need to see a dentist but know I can't afford the work that will need doing and feel ashamed. I've been seeing an ADHD coach for 8 months but was even too embarrassed to talk about it with her. Also, when I hear people say things like 'oh, it's just like brushing your teeth, you don't think about it, you just do it'! NO, not everyone! I'm at the beginning of learning to be an ADHD coach with ADDCA and in class today, someone mentioned the difficulty of helping ADHD kids clean their teeth. Then someone said adults also struggle and suddenly, a layer of shame, guilt and isolation started to life off my shoulders.... it wasn't just me! Then I saw this video, it's like now is the time for me to forgive myself, face my difficulties and accept help. Thank you so much Jessica for your honesty and courage to share your struggles and help others. I want to do that when I start coaching. I hope I find a compassionate dentist too!
I've said this so many times: your channel is such a safety net for us. I've also said "thank you" so many times -- but you deserve that and more. Thank you. That said, I'm having tooth issues. Just before the pandemic officially started in the US, I made my last visit to my dentist. I wasn't able to go back because I was so overwhelmed (I didn't understand at the time). When I finally was able to make a dental appointment, I found out my dentist no longer accepted my insurance. So now I need to make an appointment, but I need to find a new dentist first. And I*NEED* to see a dentist. I'm constantly under fear of a dental emergency...
Teeth stuff is still one of my biggest adhd challenges, and one of the areas I have the most shame around. I don’t know why everyone has a story about a dentist shaming them- maybe it works on neurotypical? Anyway, thank you so much for your vulnerability and openness about this, it’s very validating and I think it’ll help me
I am neurotypical (or at least I don't have a diagnosis saying otherwise) but dental care has always been jarring to me. Dentists shaming me since I was a kid for my teeth have always been extremely unhelpful and even traumatizing to an extent.
Thank you for this. Currently dealing with an abscess that could've been avoided had I just dealt with a broken tooth months ago. ADHD + early dental trauma really set me back. So thankful for your content.
Same here, I do think that it's time that the dental health industry was made to comply with scientific testing of the advice they hand out. I'm having a checkup next week after years of delays because I got so sick of being given the same brush my teeth and floss advice and being blamed for not doing it properly when I was doing what was asked of me and typical dentists have no idea why it doesn't always work. If they can't look at somebody's habits and predict who is and isn't going to get gum disease, then they need to stop pretending like those are the entirety of dental hygiene outside of regular in office cleanings.
Literally in the same boat. I finally found a dentist a few years ago and he was wonderful, helped me deal with childhood dental trauma… and then he retired and I haven’t wanted to go through that again
Oh I've been in that same boat as well. The (visible) abscess made me feel so aweful and ashamed. Sending you love, hope, bravery or anything else that you need! ❤
Oh my goodness your story is literally mine as well!!! The soft enamel, the broken teeth, the tons of cavities etc.... literally sounded like you were sharing my story. Ugh thank you so much for speaking on this and being vulnerable. It's comforting to know I'm not alone. That my ADHD also hit this area of my life too.
I didn't go to the dentist for 10 years because I lost my insurance at 18 and didn't get it again for a long time. I feel like I went so often as a kid that it almost desensitized me and I was used to it. But because I hadn't gone in so long, I was terrified. I hate being touched, I'm so extra sensitive. But I had the most amazing dental hygienist who literally held my hand and talked me through everything as I had tears streaming down the sides of my face. I will never forget that woman and how much she helped me
I am SO glad you made this video! It is SO important to find a dental office that has a team that makes you feel comfortable, safe, and seen! So happy you found a great office. And so thankful you shared your story! It will help so many people! Also loved your tip about having multiple toothpaste flavor options available! Makes me happy!
Because of your channel and my very helpful wife, I have been diagnosed with ADHD and things are definitely improving. Dental neglect is probably the single biggest source of shame for me, I go through cycles of not going to the dentist, and I never knew how common it was for ADHD people. I really appreciate this video, it feels very timely. I was doing okay, had regular dental visits, and then COVID shut it down, and I need to get back on the schedule.
Same, I got thrown off the schedule and have been struggling to reboot it. We can do this! Also, I take long breaks to zone out, exercise, somehow process the stress in my body after dentist visits. On days I can afford to with my work schedule, that is. It's so helpful. Cuz the visits exhaust me even on good brain days.
I never thought that I'll cry together with someone about dental hygiene and yet here I am. Thank you for sharing and talking about this topic that's so important and yet so loaded with shame. I really feel this... I had quite the same story with a bite splint back in 2020 that really wasn't cheap but I didn't went back to adjust it.... And yeah, now 2023 is almost over.
I've been putting off making a dentist appointment for a cleaning for MONTHS. This is clearly a sign, I'm gonna make the appointment for right after I get back from my holiday. Thanks for being so honest about this Jessica. I feel really embarassed about the fact that flossing is so hard for me, simply because it's so boring. What you said about brushing after dinner and then having a snack is still better than not brushing at all, is maybe something I could apply to flossing in a way. Thanks so much!
Yes, nothing beats the boredom-score of flossing. I've gamified it for myself by doing a quick happy dance every time I can visually see debris on the floss, because that's a 👹 caught, who would otherwise have hurt my tooth.
This is spookily well-timed for me (just had a filling come out and need a root canal and am too scared to go to the dentist) and just, like… *thank you*. I didn’t know other people struggled like this with dental stuff. I thought it was just me and like you said, I’m scared to go to the dentist to start dealing with it because it’s embarrassing to have let it get this bad and so I’m avoiding it and that’s just making it worse. In terms of things that help, I discovered (literally within the last week!) that I don’t get bored brushing my teeth if I pace around the bathroom while I do it. And now that I know I won’t get bored, it’s easier to get started. I’m still not great at keeping a routine, but I’m getting better at it just because of that one little trick. Which feels a little weird.
I used to really struggle with dental care as a child (absolutely HATED the dentist & brushing my teeth) but I've gotten way better as I've gotten older
I don't have ADHD but I am neurodiverse and my mouth and my teeth are my biggest source of shame. I have the worst issues with this. Going to the dentist doesn't even bother me once I'm there, it's the shame from the care needed. Thank you for talking about this. Feeling alone in this sucks.
I forget to brush my teeth every day and my mom always gets on to me about how little I brush my teeth and when I was younger the first time I went to the dentist they had to give me a root canal. I have ADHD and this channel is help me out a lot with understanding how my brain works and how to get better at school and what I can do to improve myself and get through high school.
I'm not diagnosed with ADHD yet but I think I have enough symptoms to be diagnosed, and I almost never brushed my teeth when I was going to highschool, because whenever I was supposed to do it, I didn't remember, and when the time passed, I just never thought to do it again. Even if I remembered I didn't brush my teeth I would come up with excuses like "I have to do homework first", and then forget about brushing my teeth again. Now it's years since school and I'm married, so my partner nicely asks me if I want to brush my teeth. it makes a big difference when someone says "Hey did you want to do that?" vs "Hey you know you have to do that!". I think a lot of parents make the mistake of telling the kids they "have to do it", if you ask them "did you want to do it", it becomes your own decision, and makes you want to do it more, compared to feeling like they're making you do something,
As someone who is going through almost the same thing after struggling to keep up on my teeth and is now suffering the consequences, this is both very well timed and very appreciated.
I’ve honestly never felt so seen by a video. For years I’ve been ashamed of how hard it is for me to do basic dental care and am always embarrassed of my teeth. To know that my adhd had something to do with that makes me feel so much better and that all my attempts these last years to be better are monumental. Love your content❤.
I love this video- I never made the connection w adhd and teeth. I am awful at remembering to brush my teeth and floss and always feel shame. This is such a validating video. Thanks as always
THANK YOU for talking about this!!! I’ve had so much shame for at least 20 years because of the way I’ve neglected my teeth. I’m 42, and my adhd wasn’t diagnosed until about 5 years ago, and I’m just now beginning to come around to the idea of allowing myself to be vulnerable enough to get help with my teeth. I know I have tons of cavities, and I’m scared to even find out the extent of the work I’m going to need, but this video was incredibly encouraging to me.
You've got this! You deserve to get the dental treatment you need. Be assured that no dentist will judge you for the state of your teeth. They'll just be glad you're taking steps to take care of them now
I love that you allow yourself to show your emotions ❤ sometimes adhd/add is very hard, especially when other people just don’t get it how it feels like to have that “disability”. I got fired because I was too chaotic or slow in my work as a teenager. I had like 5 different jobs from age 14 to 19. I’m now 19 years old.
as someone with adhd and really bad teeth, thank you for your honesty about this. my teeth have been causing me a lot of anxiety lately and it's extremely reassuring to see someone who is so successful who struggles with the same things I do
as someone with ADHD I started to use an electric Oral B toothbrush 12 years ago and haven't looked back since. Electric toothbrush is the way to go. They are way more effective at brushing then regular toothbrush and it doesn't take us much thinking to just let the electric toothbrush do its work and then its over.
Don't forget to switch out your brush head regularly. I feel when it starts to brush less effective, but then I forget to switch it. So now I put it in my calendar as a three monthly reminder. Also... Don't get distracted... You don't know if you've brushed every part and before you know it, you have to brush a second or a third time.
Thanks to your comment Im looking at them. The fact that sone of them have a TIMER is a godsend. Seriously considering getting one, possibly a second one to keep in the shower too.
@@XxAmayaSanxX I'd recommend to stir away from the iO models, because the replacement heads are *way* too expensive and known for getting really filthy. I use a Genius X, which works with the standard heads and also has a pressure sensor and timer.
I had the exact same experience! I finally found a dentist that understood how hard it is for me with my ADHD, sensory and anxiety issues, and she treated me like a person who wasn't broken and also allowed me to use my noise cancelling headphones during treatment so that I can distract myself from the drill. I also make a daily reminder to brush my teeth and put in my mouthguard before heading to bed each night. It's been a struggle, but that has helped me. Thank you for posting videos that make me realize that i'm not alone in this struggle!❤
I was pleasantly surprised to see you release a video on this topic. I, too, struggle with dental hygiene--choosing to unwind over brushing my teeth at night, going years without a dental appointment, not following up with my dentist on whether my insurance approved my deep cleaning, etc. It hadn't crossed my mind that these issues might be connected with my ADHD. I'm generally too embarrassed to admit that I'm a middle-aged man who still has trouble with dental hygiene, something we were supposed to have nailed during childhood. It's comforting to know I'm not alone. For starters, I'll try brushing right after dinner, and I'll use my electric toothbrush since it has a built-in timer to help me spend 30 seconds per quadrant. Thank you!
Research suggests brushing directly after you eat is actually not the best thing, because it may damage your tooth enamel. My habit is brush just before bed - regardless of whether that is 9pm or 4am.
Oh how I wish there was a "LOVE" button!! I'm almost 60 and have lived my entire life not understanding why I cannot learn to function "normally" in life. Everyday tasks, that I see everyone else just do naturally and without even a ripple in their day, become noticeable chains that cripple every aspect of my day. The silliest, seemingly easiest things become crippling chains; I get frustrated, people get frustrated with me and I look like I am an idiot. It's so hard to not feel defeated... I'm never truly "ahead of the game" or "caught up." You have blessed me so many ways!! Thank you for being vulnerable before the world and helping so many start the healing process. Sending you a Texas sized Grandma hug!!!
It's very very difficult. I also had a terrible dentist when I was young and was traumatized by him. I am so happy to have found your channel. We are in this together. You have support.
I feel like you are speaking to me. I lost a parent in 2020 and am currently dealing with a mess with my teeth. I’m so embarrassed and nervous and worried about the financial piece. Thank you for sharing this. It’s amazing to know that I’m not alone.
I have ADHD and have always struggled with this and when you said to try different toothpaste or just try to make it more fun made me realize how how poorly I take care of myself so I wanted to say thank you for making these videos they help me so much more then you would know
Thank you for talking about this! Coincidentally, I had a dentist's appointment a week ago (which my neurotypical wife made for me), because two of my wisdom teeth had turned black! 😬 I have a childhood trauma (braces - tooth extraction - local anesthesia not working), so I dreaded this appointment, BUT … the wisdom teeth can most likely stay, because I went to the dentist early enough! He explained to me what led to the issue and that (with the time I will realistically invest in brushing my teeth) using an electrical toothbrush is the only way to go. He recommended a model that gets the job done well and told me where I could find it on offer (50%) that week. Needless to say … it works! After three days of sore gums (because switching to electronical is brutal at first), brushing my teeth is now easier, faster and (most importantly) sufficiently thorough! Special thanks to my wife for making that appointment (with zero room for discussion) and the best dentist I could wish for, who perfectly understood the impact of my trauma. And thank you, Jessica, for breaking the ice around the topic. Let's talk mental health and dental health!
Thanks for being brave and helping me understand this connection. You are a treasure to the ADHD community! I honestly thought that I was the only person who doesn't look forward to brushing my teeth, despite being very adamant about personal hygiene. Had no idea it was ADHD related.
This is AMAZING for me because literally yesterday afternoon I had several panic attacks/meltdowns over the state of my teeth. I switched to tooth tabs for environmental and sensory reasons, but it led to aggressive brushing and damaging my gums (I think). I booked an appointment to see a new dentist after years of not going to see one. It’s been a huge wall of awful for me and now I get to feel proud of what I’ve accomplished
Glide floss (or generic equivalent) is key for me! so much more enjoyable. I also use a 2-minute sand timer that dentists give kids (or that come in boardgames) to brush long enough! i also usually listen or watch something on my phone to make those endless 2 minutes go by faster 😅
It’s like you actually heard me crying this morning over this… the shame and disappointment of not being able to get over this, it’s so beyond hard. I’ve got multiple broken teeth and still can’t get myself to get to a dentist. I’ve tried 3 different dentists, but with my medical issues, none have been willing to help. The cost of pulling everything and the thought of full dentures in my 30s leaves me wanting to just hide under a rock though 😔
Thank you for being so vulnerable in how you feel. Ive been really struggling and seeing that other people with adhd struggle with everything too makes me not feel alone.
Something that has helped me immensely is knowing that a little bit is always better than nothing. And this can go for any task. But specifically for teeth cleaning, if i can only brush a little I do that. If i can't brush I use mouth wash instead. If I can only floss once a week, its better than nothing at all. If I remember to brush in the middle of the day I just do it at that time instead of waiting till later. Having this mentality has improved my teeth and honestly helped me get over the overwhelm multiple times. I've been having better dental visits because of it.
I've found the following works for me. 1) I increased the number of times per year I visited the dentist. I think this is something everyone should do (I understand the cost involved), but once or twice a year is honestly too long. For one you get lazy between visits, that impending doom clock being shorter can help with motivating your care. Believe me the cost of the extra visits and even getting floried far outweighs that of a crown, fillings, and other dental surgeory needed in terms of lessoning cost. I'd also think Dental Insurance should re-orient themselves around at least encouraging this sort of frequent visit model to help save themselves money. This will help you better understand where you're getting lazy as your dentist will let you know. 2) This will help with the bordem in my opinion. A good electric tooth brush should be the start of your evening, but I've found that flossing is the most important. changing up the flossing routine with a water pick, string, and those weird finger gadgets can help change things up. Bare minimum floss with one of these things, but try to hit them all. Cahnge the side you start with each night or every couple of nights. You have 4 quandrants to work with. Even just over focusing on one quadrant and lazily working on the other 3 and rotating the starting order goes a long way based on my own visits. 3) Mouth wash in the mourning. ADHD in the morning especially if you're not a morning person can be rough. You're trying to get your brain together so it knows what's up. Mouth wash at a minmum even if you end up brushing again 15 to 20 min later goes a long way. Kills those night time germs, your teeth should be clean from the night before. At the very least you'll have a little something to at least help. 4) Don't brush before bed. Brush after dinner if possible. If you're out late, brush as soon as you get through the door. The same thing that gets you the morning will get you at night in reverse order. It's fine to hold off a bit for a desert or snack, but set a cut off time. When you're tired your brain is just going to lazy out on you while flossing or helping you hit those critical regions in your mouth such as hitting all the surface area, getting your gums, and of course your tongue. if you have a child with ADHD, I recommend getting them started on a similar routine. It'll haunt them once they are on their own.
For most people in the US, at least, (1) is often impossible. I didn't go to the dentist for the better part of 15 years because I couldn't afford insurance *and* couldn't afford the absolutely ludicrous fees, which led to a lot of really bad teeth. Everything else here is great advice.
@RvLeshrac You can always call local colleges and ask if they have dental students that do free cleanings for class credit. That's what my mom did for us when we were little. You can even call around to clinics and see if they do any "pro bono" cleanings. They get to write those off of taxes. I know it likely adds to the already building levels of embarrassment, but it could save some teeth!
I under this very well. I also have ADHD. I have spent $10,000 on dental work as well within last 3years - root canals, crowns, implants. What changed is that I married my wife 3yrs ago - and she is very encouraging and supportive. She wants me to take care of me.
So applicable. I just made a dentist appointment for a teeth cleaning for the first time in a year or two, then I saw this video! Thank you for undoing the shame I’ve been feeling recently!!
Thank you. Thank you thank you thank you. I had SO much dental and orthodontic work done on my teeth growing up and people used to always compliment how incredible my teeth are. But in my 20s/30s, I've really, REALLY let them go. Going years between cleanings, skipping basic care at home... and I'm dreading an upcoming appointment because (a) my lifelong family dentist passed away in 2021 so now I have to go somewhere new, and (b) I know for a fact I have a serious cavity (if not something worse) on a molar plus some gum recession. But the shame is so real. People who aren't neurodivergent (or "neurospicy" as my best friend calls it) don't understand just how hard it is for us to survive every day and be "normal".
Omg thank u for this! I've never been able to explain why it's hard. For me I believe it's a texture and taste thing. I use a sillacon toothbrush which works for me.
I have ADHD, chronic fatigue, and chronic pain. I’ve had braces and a retainer etc. my teeth have gon back a bit and it’s really frustrating. I only brush once, and I barley floss. However, I used to do none of it, and I’m proud of myself for getting where I have gotten. One thing that’s really helped me is an electric toothbrush. It’s a bit more expensive, but it helps get your teeth cleaner for the times you do clean your teeth. Thank you for making me feel think I’m not alone in my struggle!!
A couple things worth mentioning: One, we also are more likely to get dry mouth from stimulant medication, which can increase how quick cavities form. Second, a lot of the numbing agents used for dental procedures are made less effective by stimulant medications, so it's often wise to not take stimulants before a dental procedure so they can get you adequately numb. I'm extremely good about brushing and flossing and I still have to deal with a lot of dental problems, so sometimes it's not even our fault. Do the best you can and don't bully yourself for the problems you have with teeth; they may not even be your fault.
My best dental hack is just always scheduling my next dental appointment when I leave the current one. Some offices have you do this as a matter of standard prodecure, but if not, you can always just make sure you do it on your way out. Any time I've moved cities it's taken me a few years to get around to finding a new dentist, but once I've made that first appointment the system is foolproof. It probably does help that the dentist I saw growing up did it this way, so I associate leaving the dentist with making an appointment, so I never seem to forget on my way out, it's just part of the exiting procedure for me. But you could always add a reminder on your phone to remind you on your way out. I love the floss picks around the house idea! Will have to give that one a try
Ha, this one hits home. I'm currently having to drop a significant chunk of change to fix the mistakes of my young self. One thing my Dentist mentioned was that apparently for some people, Methylphenidate medications can cause gum swelling, which when paired with inconsistent dental care over the years leads to...really expensive and uncomfortable visits as an adult.
Within the past couple of months, I have finally started trying to get caught up with my teeth. I found an amazing dentist who is so non judgmental and kind. Unfortunately insurance sucks. I need wisdom teeth and a couple others pulled out and finding that location is proving difficult. I got my first root canal on one of my almost front teeth and then insurance denied the crown. Tomorrow I have to go see the dentist again because the entire tooth broke off in the front of my mouth. It's so shameful and so discouraging especially because I have been able to mostly hide it until now. Thank you for this. I hate that you are also struggling but thank you for your brave honesty. Thank you for letting us know we aren't alone.
Hey Jessica! I can't believe how much I can relate to your experience. I've also got (autism) an aversion to strong tastes like mint. Once I realised it was actually okay (and possible!) to get flavour free paste, I actually developed a habit. Never understood why I couldn't prior to diagnosis. Anyway, good teeth or bad, you're an invaluable, wonderful person. Carry on taking good care of yourself. PS. The flossing idea is genius!!! ❤
Oh, one of my people. I hate mint. (Also the smell of it.). It’s so hard to get non-menthol flouride toothpaste. It stopped me from cleaning my teeth as a kid, and it was only after my mother bought me fruit flavoured toothpaste that I got into the habit of cleaning. I’m grateful she realised!
I'm so glad this video came out today. I'm going to talk to a doctor about seeking an ADHD diagnosis in a couple hours (an appointment it took me three years to get around to making....) And I've been thinking a lot lately about why brushing my teeth is so arduous. My current dentist is really nice. I'm in my 30s but when I get into that horrid little chair I immediately turn into a crying little kid because I'm anticipating all the pain and discomfort that comes with dental visits. When I had to get a cavity filled, they gave me a pink blanky and one of those foam squishy toys that looked like a pair of dentures (which I promptly sqwoze the life out of) and they were so patient with me. A big barrier to brushing my teeth regularly for me is that I always ALWAYS gag or dry-heave and I haven't found a way to prevent this yet, and it just builds up dread. I like your idea for keeping floss picks around as a fidget, and I have about six million tiny mason jars, I think I'm going to try that. Thank you so much for all the work you do on these videos. I found your channel because I wanted to better understand a dear friend who had recently been diagnosed with very severe ADHD, and I've discovered so much about myself too along the way. Every new video you post comes with a sense of realization, and being seen and understood in a way I've never felt before. So even if my doctor's visit today doesn't go well, it's comforting to know that all these people are here discovering things about themselves together. Thank you for all your hard work.
Mint toothpaste makes me gag and dry heave. Have you tried a non-menthol toothpaste? Finding unflavoured toothpaste made things so much easier for me. I’m glad you’ve found a supportive dentist too. ❤
Something I really struggle with about cleaning my teeth is actually the taste of the toothpaste or the feel of the toothbrush. I have tried sooo many toothpastes and I only like 1. It’s even meant for 6 - 9 year olds. One thing I learned is that the age doesn’t even matter and it has the same amount of fluorine so it doesn’t matter that much. I also find that there are apps that are meant for little kids but they have fun things like a character and every few times you clean your teeth you will unlock some new backdrop or outfit piece and that really encourages me because I’m getting rewards for cleaning my teeth. They do like a funny dance that you can do with the character and it’s really fun and makes you less bored. There are loads of different ones to choose from and I would really recommend.
Jessica, I'd love to hear more about your bedtime wind down routine! I struggle with sleeping well and just found out about "delayed sleep phase syndrome". Thanks for all that you do!
Thank you for covering this. I so empathize with everything you've said here. My partner and I both have ADHD, and we're both having teeth issues that we're having trouble dealing with. He is on government dental insurance, which adds another row of bricks to the wall of awful for him. Only a handful of places will take government dental insurance in our city, and finding one can be a real challenge. It can take hours of calling around getting lots of negative results. It's really frustrating! Because of this, he has been putting off going to the dentist for literal years until the other day one of his teeth just fell out of his mouth. He couldn't put it off anymore. My heart went out to him as he called place to place trying to find anyone who could take him in. After two hours of looking, he finally found a dentist that would do a cleaning and would pull the tooth. No other dental work is really covered, so once that is finished, we will have to go through the process of shopping around for a different dentist or seeing if this one has an affordable payment plan to do the bridge out of pocket. My teeth need work too, but they aren't quite as bad. I have dental insurance but I haven't been to the dentist in more than 20 years so... I'm scared and ashamed. I still have 25 year old cement on the back of two of my teeth from a "permanent" retainer that fell off about a year after hey put it on.
Thank you SO MUCH for talking about this. I've felt shame for so long, far before I got my ADHD diagnosis. It's so hard to brush my teeth twice a day, much less doing anything else. And the assumption in almost every place is that you can easily brush twice a day, and if you're not, then it's your fault... and we're not going to tell you how to make it easier.
Something that was an eye opener for me a few years back was discovering that the whole "brush twice a day for 2 minutes" routine isn't backed by anywhere near as much research as you'd expect. Keeping a neutral pH in the mouth and a balance of good bacteria vs. bad is just as important as traditionally brushing. So instead of worrying about brushing when it's not convenient, keep a small bottle of mouthwash handy and you'll get a lot of the same benefits. I like the little 2oz travel spray bottles because you can easy spray a few times to get enough to rinse.
The most discouraging thing for me brushing my teeth is that, nowadays from chronic neglect, every time i try to brush them...they bleed. I actually floss more frequently than i brush because it's easier to floss the crud that stuck between the teeth than brush them.
I relate so deeply to your experiences, this video truly means more than I can say. No one has ever spoken about these types of dental health struggles, and I've felt so alone and ashamed of how badly I do. I also have genetically bad teeth, so the problem of not seeing clear results {still getting cavities} when I was able to keep up with my dental care has made it SO much harder to convince myself this is worth dealing with. I'm also in the beginning of trying to heal this part of my life, I actually have my second cavity filling in a few hours. I have the added fear of needles in my mouth, which also brings It's own form of shame to the table, that makes it even harder. But I'm trying, and so are you, and it's not easy for either of us. And that's okay. I'm sorry I sort of just started rambling lol, but it really is comforting to know that this is hard for other people too. We're in this together. And we've got this
I watched this yesterday actually and can’t get it out of my head. I was just officially diagnosed this summer I had been toying with testing sooner but I felt shame in it. I thought maybe I was too old to even think about it. I’ve been watching your videos for some time and every time I do, I go, oh wow it’s not just me. I watched this video in tears yesterday because this is me. I haven’t been to the dentist in around 10 years and before I stopped going I was always needing stuff fixed. Honestly I haven’t even went for a check up at the doctor in about that time too as I now feel like it’s been so long and that’s shameful too. Anyway, I just want to say thank you for being brave enough to talk about things like this because it really helps.
Oh, thank you so much for this. I used to think I was the only person in the world who could positively hate brushing their teeth and it embarrased me enormously, until I realised it was ADHD-related: an overwhelming sensory overload. Buying a toothpaste with salty flavour did wonders for me. I keep forgetting about flossing though. Using it as fidgeting could be the solution!
Thank you so much for sharing about this. Ive been struggling for years with shame about my teeth and just felt defeated. As a young adult I've struggled to make and keep up with appointments at the dentist and I could never explain why. I'm going to show this to my mom later and I so happy to be able to articulate what Im feeling.❤
I know that this video is spurred by your personal struggle with dental care, but as a neurodivergent licensed optician, an eye care video with tips on how to make that ADHD friendlier would be sublime! ❤❤
You are the absolute OG of ADHD! Your videos have extended my life by 5 years and counting. Talking about this stuff matters in ways that you can't imagine!!. Nightmares of dentist drills and blinding lights can linger for decades. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!
So this is a video i actually recently went looking for recently on your channel. I have adhd and so obviously routines like this are hard and so i actually appreciate this video because caring for my teeth usually goes on the back burner. this channel has genuinely helped me in so many ways :)
Thank you so much for speaking up about this! I have experienced a lot of shame from not being able to consistently do what seems so easy for others, ie brushing my teeth. It's good to know I'm not the only one. Maintenance is so hard when you can't executive function! And for the record, when I had my retainer I had to fish it out of the trash (or get it replaced entirely) more than a few times! 😅
Thank you so much for sharing this. It really helps a lot to feel less alone with this. I also really struggle with taking care of my teeth (among other things), and it really helps to know that I'm not the only person in the world struggling with this. I don't need to be ashamed, that only makes things worse. It is okay. Brushing teeth for 10s is still better than not brushing them at all :)
Thank you for talking about this! I’ve been procrastinating going to the dentist. I’ve hit a couple of bad ones that were pretty judgmental. It’s just hard to take care of your teeth sometimes.
OMG this was posted perfectly in time for me. Thank you for posting this. I struggle with taking care of my teeth, too. I'm super thankful and lucky that my parents took me to cleanings & fluoride treatments regularly when I was a kid. I've had no trauma around going to the dentist, and yet I struggle with going as an adult and I feel so dumb about it... Thank you again.
Having broken a wisdom tooth during a financial rock bottom, and having just found a suitable dentist right before moving countries to a place where 80% of the people do not speak a language I can properly express myself in I find this both very relatable and encouraging. I still have to make the flight back to have my wisdom teeth extracted in my home country because I 100% will not be able to do it without a autism friendly dentist I can actually communicate with and feel I can trust. I feel so bad it's been over a year but this makes me feel a lot better
I've had lots of issues with my teeth over the years. As a kid, even when I did everything right, a trip to the dentist could seriously screw me up. I had braces, was diligent about using my retainer, brushed and flossed, but still got cavities, chipped teeth, etc. The trauma I experienced at the dentist didn't help, especially since I am afraid of needles and, being allergic to sulfa medication, meant that instead of just one or two shots of numbing meds, it would be 5 or 6 shots, and they never actually waited long enough for it to start working before drilling. Did you know that most numbing agents take 15 minutes to start being effective? Yeah, they never wait, just stab you with the needle and start drilling, meanwhile I'm panicking, in pain, and crying. It's part of why whenever sedation was offered - such as for wisdom teeth extraction - I took them up on it. Put me under with just one needle? Yes please. Mint toothpaste wakes me up _and_ makes me hungry, so I hate brushing my teeth at night, but I had recently switched to bubblegum flavor toothpaste and that's been more helpful. I had been scared off other flavor toothpastes for a long time after trying this "orange flavor" toothpaste for adults like 20 years ago - it tasted like a dirty orange peel - but after trying different flavors I've found kid's toothpastes tend to work for me. For better hygiene, you should floss before brushing, but hey, at least flossing at some point during the day is a step in the right direction.
I love how you posted this because this is exactly what I’m going through I’m missing a tooth too ! I was open and honest with my dentist and they are so understanding! They always work with me too!
I really appreciate your channel and you talking about stuff like this and being so open and honest to us. It really helps me feel less alone and more understood and less like a bad person because of the sometimes negative consequences of my ADHD symptoms. I had braces for a long time too and have retainers now, but my teeth have shifted some because I didn't wear them as consistently as I should have and sometimes I feel guilty about that. I also struggle with flossing and brushing my teeth. I got an electric toothbrush recently and those flosser picks you showed and those have made a big difference in how often I'm able to care for my teeth. I also like water picks too. I am 19 and it has been insanely difficult for me to make progress towards being a self sufficient adult. School did a lot of damage to me. It lowered my self confidence, my confidence in my intelligence, it felt like cruel and unusual torture for neurodivergent people, and I was super sleep deprived and burned out for multiple years. I barely have any energy. I was diagnosed with ADHD a few months ago, although I've known I have it for years. I was hoping to be able to be treated with the classic ADHD medication(s) because I've seen how much of a difference it's made for other ADHD people, but because I have a very mild rare congenital heart defect, I am only allowed to have generic wellbutrin. It has made me feel less depressed, but it hasn't helped my ADHD and I feel like I'm dragging myself through tar to do anything productive, even something small like washing dishes. I still live with my parents, and I am trying I really am to make money on my own, but because of my sensory sensitivities ( I'm also autistic) and the fact that I learn more slowly, the typical teen/young adult entry level jobs are a nightmare for me. I am going to start a freelance work-from-home job soon which should be ideal for me, but it is hard to get started and it makes me nervous because it's new and more serious responsibility. I know logically that everyone makes mistakes and it's ok and that's how we learn, but my emotions won't listen to my logic and I feel pathetic every time I make a mistake or fail at something. My best hasn't been enough for so long, sometimes I feel like I'll never really be an adult, living on my own happily, with a job where I make enough money to sustain myself. My progress is so slow, it's just discouraging. It is nice to have RUclips channels like this that make me feel more normal, at least among neurodivergent people. Thank you, and I hope you do better too. ❤
Thank you so much for talking about this! I've also struggled taking care of my teeth consistently, which led to a cavity and now a broken tooth. Between finances and shame I still haven't gotten it taken care of yet. I'm going to try these ADHD-friendly tips to try to get back on track and hopefully see a dentist soon.
Don't know if I have ADHD for sure, but I definitely identify with everything here, and it's good to know I'm not the only person who struggles with this. Thanks for sharing!
Thank you for posting this vulnerable video! Dental care is something I really struggle with daily so knowing I’m not alone with this struggle is so helpful!! I’m not diagnosed but am quite certain I have adhd because of a lot of your content revealing the various struggles in my life that I thought was just me being rubbish at being a human. But I’m beginning the process of getting assessed at the end of the year!
This video made feel so heard! I’ve been struggling with it for years and it’s one of the main things I’m working on with my therapist. Alarms on my phone have helped some.
I subscribed in 2018 or 2019, and have really enjoyed that content this whole time. That said, I think this might be the most relatable one yet. It really seems like Jessica is able to give us more actionable tips and relate to us better than any other channel I have found so far. I preordered the book on kindle, and can’t wait to see what it is like. :)
Thank you so much for making this video… i finally made a dentist appointment today. I’m finally able to watch this because I’ve been avoiding this video like I was the dentist… no more!! We literally have the same issue, down to the missing filling with the tooth that needs pulled. It does feel embarrassing… but I feel so seen and supported because of this video! Thank you again
The problem for me is the disconnect between thinking "I should" and doing. I can literally go to the toilet, do my business, look at the sink and stuff on it, think "I should wash my teeth", and STILL walk away. Not even "can", it just happens. And I don't know how to break that disconnection.
I have pretty resilient teeth (thanks, Mom) but I've had such traumatic dentist experiences that I cannot get myself to the dentist. But I like your comment about enlisting friends and community to help. I think I might actually need to ask a friend to help me by sitting me down to make an appointment and then driving me to the dentist. It's that terrifying. Thank you for this validation. I have a morning routine now for dental hygiene but evenings are rough. I totally resonate with needing to go to bed when I'm tired and not waking myself back up with chores.
Thank you for talking about dental care and it's relationship to adhd. I have the same struggles. Having anxiety I grind my teeth and unfortunately didn't catch it early enough when I was younger now my teeth are ground down and I hate it; it is my number one insecrity. I feel overwhelmed by the cost and work that needs to be done not to mention finding a dentis. So thank you for addressing these issue plus I now feel like I am not the only one who struggles with these kind of issues. ❤
I'm 40 and I have struggled with my dental health my whole life. My most recent broken tooth happened on my wedding anniversary. I just got another permanent crown. I feel your pain. You are not alone. I'm glad you found such a good dentist. When you have a relationship with your dentist it makes it easier to want to go. I also try to make my next appointment while I'm still standing in the office and put it in my calendar with an alarm. Every time I move or change jobs I need to find a new dentist, which is the hardest thing.
Are crowns functional? Can you chew with them? I have two broken molars. It’s really nice hearing about this topic I’ve been really anxious about my teeth lately. I’m 28 and really want to prevent more damage.
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Can you do an episode where you're the Nega You?
Or is this you already?
We are actually on the brink of growing a third set of teeth during our later years of life on earth due to our longer life spans.
i found a safe place yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AS a dentist, I see many people who come in ashamed of their teeth. But I learn a long time ago that bad teeth do not equal bad people. And if you are in my chair now, you are on the right track, and should be commended not shamed. There is no point worry about what you did or didn't do before now, we can't change that, but what we can do is work on a plan to get you in the best shape we can moving forward.
Love this perspective, thank you for commenting!!
Yeah I didn't go to a dentist for most of my adult life partly because of cost and partly because I was never in the habit of it to begin with. So one thing I was apprehensive about was getting a lecture from the dentist on the state of my teeth (very very very bad). But one of my front teeth broke recently and then that was the kick in the pants that I needed. Partly because I have a family member who keeps nagging at me to go to the dentist, and I do resent that because I'm an adult and it's not her business but I just didn't want to hear it from her so as soon as that tooth broke I called a dentist and made an appointment. Just so that if my family member started lecturing me again that I could tell her I am going to see the dentist lol
This is exactly what needs to be said.
OMG, I am only just putting this together now at the age of 45. I have had struggles taking care of my teeth my entire life and I have just started going through the diagnosis for ADHD this year, but this video is the first time I have put these things together. Then this comment about being shamed at the dentist. This is one more barrier that I have had and never realised it. I'd eventually get my act together long enough to get to an appointment and every dentist I have had has shamed me about my teeth. Then I'd only make it to one or two appointments before I couldn't face them again and there'd be another 4, 5, 6 + years before I'd be able to get myself to search for another dentist. Not sure how I deal with it, but I wish you were my dentist. You sound amazing.
I have had great dentists who share your opinion. Unfortunately, dentists are also people... which means that some of them are... not so understanding. When one is suffering severe pain from teeth that need to be removed, being a condescending snit and telling me that I'll "be in dentures by the time you're 35"... is not going to encourage me to make regular appointments. (Incidentally, he was also wrong. I was over 50, and later learned there were additional medical issues involved - Sjogren's.)
Thankfully, that was one of only two terrible dentists in my life, and the other one I only had to deal with once as an emergency measure.
For the sensory issues at the actual dentist, ask them if you can wear the lead vest the whole time. It is the BEST weighted blanket ever. It helps me so much!
That is such a good idea!
I finally have a dentist where I felt comfortable asking for this, and she enthusiastically agreed! It was a game changer!!! ❤❤❤❤
Genius thanks!😊
I noticed that last time I was there !!!! Wow great suggestion 😊
I don't personally need it, but next time I'm there I'm going to ask for it, just to help de-stigmatize it.
As a dental assistant with ADHD MDD and anxiety I am so freaking proud of you for talking about this. It is hard to take care of your teeth when you are just trying to hold yourself together! I often have patients tell me they are scared when they come in and I say “that’s perfectly reasonable! Most people are, but you don’t have anything to be afraid of here. We are going to make this as comfortable as possible”. We let our patients make payments as big or small as they need to because we just want them comfortable.
On my really bad weeks or months it is hard for me to take care of my teeth, but I have been lucky enough to have 2 years of education to learn what can happen along accommodations I can give myself to keep them healthy. Not everyone is so lucky and I know that, that’s why I try to educate people gently and with compassion. Again I’m so proud of you for talking about this
water reminder erinbailey
Thank you for this reassurance 😭❤️
What are the accommodations you use to keep your teeth healthy when it's a struggle
this might be the most important and helpful video to me on your channel. this is one of the hardest and most shameful things about my ADHD and it’s so relieving to know that other people struggle with this
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❤❤❤ I feel the same way! It feels good to know I'm not alone in this struggle.
It's the same for me. Really my whole family is struggling with this topic and since I'm freshly diagnosed I wonder if that's why...
I was so reluctant to even tell my therapist about my dental issues because of the shame I felt. It was such a relief to hear from her that it was actually a super common problem among adhders and I wasn’t her only client who struggled with that.
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@@adhdcentral I reported your hundreds of spam messages and your channel for this behaviour. Don't hide behind the good intent of your spam messages, you are just seeking attention whilst adding nothing to the personal stories that are told by people. I suggest you stop this behaviour.
I'm a hygienist with ADHD and it's really helpful in having so much empathy for everyone not just neurodivergent people, I always say the past doesn't matter, you are here and you are doing something now that matters. It also gives me good perspective for strategies to help people with their oral health routine
I just had another round of finding out I need another $1000 of dental work so this is so appreciated. I feel the exact same way, and I’m always so ashamed to go to the dentist. Luckily my dentist is very accepting and supportive, so it does help but I’ve also been feeling so frustrated and hopeless about my dental health. Thank you for sharing and making me feel seen.
Awwwwwww ugh yeah I feel that... I'm glad I could share and I'm glad it's helped a little
In the same boat - I started getting fillings last year but then a few unexpected expenses in a row and I’m halfway thru the bare minimum work done and not sure when I’ll be able to start again, and also got the RSD due to suddenly stopping halfway thru the treatment plan :/
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This is so relatable! I never made the connection between my ADHD and poor dental hygiene habits. It is so frustrating to know you should be doing better or more and you’re just not doing it, over and over again. Thanks for sharing!
friendly water reminder emilychurch6526
Me neither! I feel like it is so easy for me to get off track with taking care of my teeth. We used to go to a dentist when I was younger that was so awful about pushing expensive treatments on my family. I have had better times with other dentists after but yeah it can be difficult to complain about the taste of toothpaste or explain the tiredness at the end of the day. I've had so many things to try and remember to be a good adult and I just want to sleep. T he last thing I want to do is put minty fresh stuff on my teeth. These have been such great tips and it's just so nice that Jessica had been brave enough to talk about this cause I certainly have felt this shame too...
As a brain starting dental hygiene school this fall I’m glad you’re opening up about this specifically for adhd- it’s so important to know you’re not alone 💕
That’s what I love about this community 💝💝
Here’s some (..a lot of) tips that have helped me and others:
• you don’t have to stay on one place (ex the bathroom) to brush/floss, moving from room to room IS allowed and more stimulating
• something > nothing, if you’re so tired/overwhelmed you know you won’t brush your teeth that night- brush for less time or just mouthwash.
It won’t clean your teeth but it will help to protect them a little and that counts for something!
• play a video/song while you brush to time/motivate you
• if you tend to forget, keep your toothbrush in an open, clean area where you’ll see it
• if sensory issues are stopping you (depending on severity) reward yourself for doing hard things and find ways to make it easier like using yummy kids toothpaste instead of adult ones - don’t be too scared to talk to your hygienist about it they might have tips to help (or know someone who does)
• have a pre/post/during dental visit ritual that helps keep you calm/motivated. Things like headphones, fidgets, comfy clothes, playing your favorite show/song help a lot. Don’t be afraid to tell the dental crew you’re nervous- trust me you’re far from alone and that small social support could help.
• the best toothbrush/anything is the one you’ll actually use. Example: you always forget to charge the electric or have sensory sensitivity to it don’t feel forced to use something that’s not you-friendly.
It’s job is to work for you, not the other way around.
I’ve habitually already done some of these (I pace from room to room or fidget with my other hand while brushing/flossing, and definitely prefer the “yummy kid’s toothpaste” + toothbrush I don’t have to charge, but I may as well try the others too. I agree with this comment and its definitely helpful, and I’d like to add to the list, but due to working memory problems I’ll think of it in a couple hours. Odds are I will be unable to add to the list as I’d have to find this video again when/if I do remember what I wanted to put here. Its on the tip of my tongue, but unfortunately its lost. PSA: Everybody reading this comment, go brush/floss while you’re thinking about it.
Ah, I finally remembered! Way sooner than I thought. You can get flavored/colored floss picks if it helps motivate any brains to floss. There’s probably something else I forgot, but at least its something
+1 for keeping your toothbrush visible, if mine wasn't a visual reminder I'd never brush.
Walking about is also great!
That's good, also don't forget about the autistic community, if you get good with our teeth and providing us with service that's tolerable, you'll likely never want for business. It's complete BS that dentists are allowed to get away with bullying and blaming patients in cases where the advice isn't working without bothering to look at other explanations other than insufficient brushing and flossing.
@@SmallSpoonBrigade yeah definitely - I’ve noticed a lot of neurodivergencies and mental illnesses aren’t taken into account other than for medication purposes.
SO many people could be much healthier if we listened to what was bothering them instead of deciding they aren’t “trying hard enough”.
It is SO embarrassing that I struggle so much with just brushing my teeth. This is important to talk about in adha spaces
Oh, you are not alone in this! I haven't seen a dentist for probably a decade. I moved to a new city a year ago and finally picked a dentist and got an appointment scheduled. I'm not only fighting with my ADHD, but chronic migraines, depression, anxiety, panic attacks, and PTSD. Dental care is often so far down my list of things I give a rat's patootie about! But I'm trying to make the changes I need to. It's a process.
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@@adhdcentral As in drink a lot of it?
@@choklityum reminder to stay hydrated
@@adhdcentral I drink at least 8 glasses of water a day! Thanks for the nudge! ☺️
I am currently dealing with exactly the same dental issues and have had a "Make Dentist Appointment" alarm going off weekly in my phone for the last 2 years. As an adult, I often struggle to understand why it's so hard for me to be consistent with and/or give value to my own self-care. Thank you for speaking so openly about your own experiences and sharing the tips & tricks you've discovered along the way to help navigate the long, bumpy, and expensive road that is ADHD. Your channel has helped me realize I'm not broken, and am not failing at life.
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You're doing your best and that's enough!
Life is tough sometimes. You'll get to your dentist appointment when you're able.
Maybe someone could help you book an appointment if you'd like to prioritise this more but don't have the capacity right now? You could perhaps ask a friend or family member?
If floss hurts your fingers but you don't want to use a bunch of disposable picks, there is a tool called Quip that grabs and holds the floss for you, and also comes with a portable case with a little mirror. There are a bunch of other non-disposable floss holders online, as well.
Thank you for mentioning that. It seems so obvious that someone must have thought of a sustainable solution to the floss-hurting-fingers-issue, but it somehow never crossed my mind to actually look for such a solution. 🤯 Wow!
@@Knusperfunk There's so many times I've been like WHY ISNT THERE A SOLUTION TO- oh, there is.
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I'm sooo grateful for this video! I've experienced real difficulty with this as well, mainly since I got old enough to be responsible for my dental hygiene. I've been thinking a lot lately about how I really need to see a dentist but know I can't afford the work that will need doing and feel ashamed. I've been seeing an ADHD coach for 8 months but was even too embarrassed to talk about it with her. Also, when I hear people say things like 'oh, it's just like brushing your teeth, you don't think about it, you just do it'! NO, not everyone! I'm at the beginning of learning to be an ADHD coach with ADDCA and in class today, someone mentioned the difficulty of helping ADHD kids clean their teeth. Then someone said adults also struggle and suddenly, a layer of shame, guilt and isolation started to life off my shoulders.... it wasn't just me! Then I saw this video, it's like now is the time for me to forgive myself, face my difficulties and accept help. Thank you so much Jessica for your honesty and courage to share your struggles and help others. I want to do that when I start coaching. I hope I find a compassionate dentist too!
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Shame is the first thing we should throw out. It’s so harmful to us.
Self compassion is essential for making progress.
I've said this so many times: your channel is such a safety net for us. I've also said "thank you" so many times -- but you deserve that and more. Thank you. That said, I'm having tooth issues. Just before the pandemic officially started in the US, I made my last visit to my dentist. I wasn't able to go back because I was so overwhelmed (I didn't understand at the time). When I finally was able to make a dental appointment, I found out my dentist no longer accepted my insurance. So now I need to make an appointment, but I need to find a new dentist first. And I*NEED* to see a dentist. I'm constantly under fear of a dental emergency...
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Teeth stuff is still one of my biggest adhd challenges, and one of the areas I have the most shame around. I don’t know why everyone has a story about a dentist shaming them- maybe it works on neurotypical? Anyway, thank you so much for your vulnerability and openness about this, it’s very validating and I think it’ll help me
I am neurotypical (or at least I don't have a diagnosis saying otherwise) but dental care has always been jarring to me. Dentists shaming me since I was a kid for my teeth have always been extremely unhelpful and even traumatizing to an extent.
Thank you for this. Currently dealing with an abscess that could've been avoided had I just dealt with a broken tooth months ago. ADHD + early dental trauma really set me back. So thankful for your content.
Of course!
Same here, I do think that it's time that the dental health industry was made to comply with scientific testing of the advice they hand out. I'm having a checkup next week after years of delays because I got so sick of being given the same brush my teeth and floss advice and being blamed for not doing it properly when I was doing what was asked of me and typical dentists have no idea why it doesn't always work. If they can't look at somebody's habits and predict who is and isn't going to get gum disease, then they need to stop pretending like those are the entirety of dental hygiene outside of regular in office cleanings.
Literally in the same boat. I finally found a dentist a few years ago and he was wonderful, helped me deal with childhood dental trauma… and then he retired and I haven’t wanted to go through that again
Oh I've been in that same boat as well. The (visible) abscess made me feel so aweful and ashamed. Sending you love, hope, bravery or anything else that you need! ❤
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Oh my goodness your story is literally mine as well!!! The soft enamel, the broken teeth, the tons of cavities etc.... literally sounded like you were sharing my story. Ugh thank you so much for speaking on this and being vulnerable. It's comforting to know I'm not alone. That my ADHD also hit this area of my life too.
I didn't go to the dentist for 10 years because I lost my insurance at 18 and didn't get it again for a long time. I feel like I went so often as a kid that it almost desensitized me and I was used to it. But because I hadn't gone in so long, I was terrified. I hate being touched, I'm so extra sensitive. But I had the most amazing dental hygienist who literally held my hand and talked me through everything as I had tears streaming down the sides of my face. I will never forget that woman and how much she helped me
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I am SO glad you made this video! It is SO important to find a dental office that has a team that makes you feel comfortable, safe, and seen! So happy you found a great office. And so thankful you shared your story! It will help so many people! Also loved your tip about having multiple toothpaste flavor options available! Makes me happy!
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Because of your channel and my very helpful wife, I have been diagnosed with ADHD and things are definitely improving. Dental neglect is probably the single biggest source of shame for me, I go through cycles of not going to the dentist, and I never knew how common it was for ADHD people. I really appreciate this video, it feels very timely. I was doing okay, had regular dental visits, and then COVID shut it down, and I need to get back on the schedule.
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Same, I got thrown off the schedule and have been struggling to reboot it. We can do this!
Also, I take long breaks to zone out, exercise, somehow process the stress in my body after dentist visits. On days I can afford to with my work schedule, that is. It's so helpful. Cuz the visits exhaust me even on good brain days.
I never thought that I'll cry together with someone about dental hygiene and yet here I am. Thank you for sharing and talking about this topic that's so important and yet so loaded with shame. I really feel this... I had quite the same story with a bite splint back in 2020 that really wasn't cheap but I didn't went back to adjust it.... And yeah, now 2023 is almost over.
I've been putting off making a dentist appointment for a cleaning for MONTHS. This is clearly a sign, I'm gonna make the appointment for right after I get back from my holiday. Thanks for being so honest about this Jessica. I feel really embarassed about the fact that flossing is so hard for me, simply because it's so boring. What you said about brushing after dinner and then having a snack is still better than not brushing at all, is maybe something I could apply to flossing in a way. Thanks so much!
Yes, nothing beats the boredom-score of flossing. I've gamified it for myself by doing a quick happy dance every time I can visually see debris on the floss, because that's a 👹 caught, who would otherwise have hurt my tooth.
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This is spookily well-timed for me (just had a filling come out and need a root canal and am too scared to go to the dentist) and just, like… *thank you*. I didn’t know other people struggled like this with dental stuff. I thought it was just me and like you said, I’m scared to go to the dentist to start dealing with it because it’s embarrassing to have let it get this bad and so I’m avoiding it and that’s just making it worse.
In terms of things that help, I discovered (literally within the last week!) that I don’t get bored brushing my teeth if I pace around the bathroom while I do it. And now that I know I won’t get bored, it’s easier to get started. I’m still not great at keeping a routine, but I’m getting better at it just because of that one little trick. Which feels a little weird.
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Ditto
I used to really struggle with dental care as a child (absolutely HATED the dentist & brushing my teeth) but I've gotten way better as I've gotten older
That's great to hear!
Same
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I don't have ADHD but I am neurodiverse and my mouth and my teeth are my biggest source of shame. I have the worst issues with this. Going to the dentist doesn't even bother me once I'm there, it's the shame from the care needed.
Thank you for talking about this. Feeling alone in this sucks.
I forget to brush my teeth every day and my mom always gets on to me about how little I brush my teeth and when I was younger the first time I went to the dentist they had to give me a root canal. I have ADHD and this channel is help me out a lot with understanding how my brain works and how to get better at school and what I can do to improve myself and get through high school.
Oooof yeah rough previous experience really can add to the wall of awful. You're definitely not alone in the struggle
I'm not diagnosed with ADHD yet but I think I have enough symptoms to be diagnosed, and I almost never brushed my teeth when I was going to highschool, because whenever I was supposed to do it, I didn't remember, and when the time passed, I just never thought to do it again. Even if I remembered I didn't brush my teeth I would come up with excuses like "I have to do homework first", and then forget about brushing my teeth again. Now it's years since school and I'm married, so my partner nicely asks me if I want to brush my teeth. it makes a big difference when someone says "Hey did you want to do that?" vs "Hey you know you have to do that!". I think a lot of parents make the mistake of telling the kids they "have to do it", if you ask them "did you want to do it", it becomes your own decision, and makes you want to do it more, compared to feeling like they're making you do something,
@@baileescott401Those are the gestures great relationships are built on. ❤
If the forgetting is a matter of boredom, I find having something to read or an idle game that can be played one handed helps a lot for that.
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Jess, I just want to say, I'm proud of you for overcoming the wall of awful AND for being vulnerable in public. Thank you. ❤
As someone who is going through almost the same thing after struggling to keep up on my teeth and is now suffering the consequences, this is both very well timed and very appreciated.
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Same
Same!
I’ve honestly never felt so seen by a video. For years I’ve been ashamed of how hard it is for me to do basic dental care and am always embarrassed of my teeth. To know that my adhd had something to do with that makes me feel so much better and that all my attempts these last years to be better are monumental. Love your content❤.
I love this video- I never made the connection w adhd and teeth. I am awful at remembering to brush my teeth and floss and always feel shame. This is such a validating video. Thanks as always
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THANK YOU for talking about this!!! I’ve had so much shame for at least 20 years because of the way I’ve neglected my teeth. I’m 42, and my adhd wasn’t diagnosed until about 5 years ago, and I’m just now beginning to come around to the idea of allowing myself to be vulnerable enough to get help with my teeth. I know I have tons of cavities, and I’m scared to even find out the extent of the work I’m going to need, but this video was incredibly encouraging to me.
You've got this!
You deserve to get the dental treatment you need.
Be assured that no dentist will judge you for the state of your teeth. They'll just be glad you're taking steps to take care of them now
I love that you allow yourself to show your emotions ❤ sometimes adhd/add is very hard, especially when other people just don’t get it how it feels like to have that “disability”. I got fired because I was too chaotic or slow in my work as a teenager. I had like 5 different jobs from age 14 to 19. I’m now 19 years old.
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You keep showing me things that make me feel validated as a human with ADHD.
Thanks for all you do.
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Thank you! So many people don't understand why certain issues are so hard for people with ADHD - things that other people just do. Shame is too true.
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as someone with adhd and really bad teeth, thank you for your honesty about this. my teeth have been causing me a lot of anxiety lately and it's extremely reassuring to see someone who is so successful who struggles with the same things I do
as someone with ADHD I started to use an electric Oral B toothbrush 12 years ago and haven't looked back since. Electric toothbrush is the way to go. They are way more effective at brushing then regular toothbrush and it doesn't take us much thinking to just let the electric toothbrush do its work and then its over.
The app with the newer Oral B models really helps in my opinion as well, because it gamifies the process.
Don't forget to switch out your brush head regularly. I feel when it starts to brush less effective, but then I forget to switch it. So now I put it in my calendar as a three monthly reminder. Also... Don't get distracted... You don't know if you've brushed every part and before you know it, you have to brush a second or a third time.
Until you forget to charge it 💀
Thanks to your comment Im looking at them. The fact that sone of them have a TIMER is a godsend. Seriously considering getting one, possibly a second one to keep in the shower too.
@@XxAmayaSanxX I'd recommend to stir away from the iO models, because the replacement heads are *way* too expensive and known for getting really filthy.
I use a Genius X, which works with the standard heads and also has a pressure sensor and timer.
I had the exact same experience! I finally found a dentist that understood how hard it is for me with my ADHD, sensory and anxiety issues, and she treated me like a person who wasn't broken and also allowed me to use my noise cancelling headphones during treatment so that I can distract myself from the drill. I also make a daily reminder to brush my teeth and put in my mouthguard before heading to bed each night. It's been a struggle, but that has helped me. Thank you for posting videos that make me realize that i'm not alone in this struggle!❤
I was pleasantly surprised to see you release a video on this topic. I, too, struggle with dental hygiene--choosing to unwind over brushing my teeth at night, going years without a dental appointment, not following up with my dentist on whether my insurance approved my deep cleaning, etc. It hadn't crossed my mind that these issues might be connected with my ADHD. I'm generally too embarrassed to admit that I'm a middle-aged man who still has trouble with dental hygiene, something we were supposed to have nailed during childhood. It's comforting to know I'm not alone.
For starters, I'll try brushing right after dinner, and I'll use my electric toothbrush since it has a built-in timer to help me spend 30 seconds per quadrant. Thank you!
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Research suggests brushing directly after you eat is actually not the best thing, because it may damage your tooth enamel. My habit is brush just before bed - regardless of whether that is 9pm or 4am.
Oh how I wish there was a "LOVE" button!! I'm almost 60 and have lived my entire life not understanding why I cannot learn to function "normally" in life. Everyday tasks, that I see everyone else just do naturally and without even a ripple in their day, become noticeable chains that cripple every aspect of my day. The silliest, seemingly easiest things become crippling chains; I get frustrated, people get frustrated with me and I look like I am an idiot. It's so hard to not feel defeated... I'm never truly "ahead of the game" or "caught up." You have blessed me so many ways!! Thank you for being vulnerable before the world and helping so many start the healing process. Sending you a Texas sized Grandma hug!!!
It's very very difficult. I also had a terrible dentist when I was young and was traumatized by him. I am so happy to have found your channel. We are in this together. You have support.
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I feel like you are speaking to me. I lost a parent in 2020 and am currently dealing with a mess with my teeth. I’m so embarrassed and nervous and worried about the financial piece. Thank you for sharing this. It’s amazing to know that I’m not alone.
I have ADHD and have always struggled with this and when you said to try different toothpaste or just try to make it more fun made me realize how how poorly I take care of myself so I wanted to say thank you for making these videos they help me so much more then you would know
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Thank you for talking about this! Coincidentally, I had a dentist's appointment a week ago (which my neurotypical wife made for me), because two of my wisdom teeth had turned black! 😬 I have a childhood trauma (braces - tooth extraction - local anesthesia not working), so I dreaded this appointment, BUT … the wisdom teeth can most likely stay, because I went to the dentist early enough! He explained to me what led to the issue and that (with the time I will realistically invest in brushing my teeth) using an electrical toothbrush is the only way to go. He recommended a model that gets the job done well and told me where I could find it on offer (50%) that week. Needless to say … it works! After three days of sore gums (because switching to electronical is brutal at first), brushing my teeth is now easier, faster and (most importantly) sufficiently thorough! Special thanks to my wife for making that appointment (with zero room for discussion) and the best dentist I could wish for, who perfectly understood the impact of my trauma. And thank you, Jessica, for breaking the ice around the topic.
Let's talk mental health and dental health!
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@@adhdcentral Thank you! 😁
I love this happy ending for you! Thank goodness for supportive partners. ❤
I am literally sobbing right now. Thank you so much for making me feel less alone in this
Thanks for being brave and helping me understand this connection. You are a treasure to the ADHD community! I honestly thought that I was the only person who doesn't look forward to brushing my teeth, despite being very adamant about personal hygiene. Had no idea it was ADHD related.
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This is AMAZING for me because literally yesterday afternoon I had several panic attacks/meltdowns over the state of my teeth. I switched to tooth tabs for environmental and sensory reasons, but it led to aggressive brushing and damaging my gums (I think). I booked an appointment to see a new dentist after years of not going to see one. It’s been a huge wall of awful for me and now I get to feel proud of what I’ve accomplished
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4:12 "and if we succeed, it's at the expense of something else"
Oh my gosh. Yes!!! I feel this so much.
Glide floss (or generic equivalent) is key for me! so much more enjoyable. I also use a 2-minute sand timer that dentists give kids (or that come in boardgames) to brush long enough! i also usually listen or watch something on my phone to make those endless 2 minutes go by faster 😅
Same! I have about 40 packs in the cupboard in case they ever get rid of it 😂
It’s like you actually heard me crying this morning over this… the shame and disappointment of not being able to get over this, it’s so beyond hard. I’ve got multiple broken teeth and still can’t get myself to get to a dentist. I’ve tried 3 different dentists, but with my medical issues, none have been willing to help. The cost of pulling everything and the thought of full dentures in my 30s leaves me wanting to just hide under a rock though 😔
You got this!!! 💙
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Thank you for being so vulnerable in how you feel. Ive been really struggling and seeing that other people with adhd struggle with everything too makes me not feel alone.
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Something that has helped me immensely is knowing that a little bit is always better than nothing. And this can go for any task. But specifically for teeth cleaning, if i can only brush a little I do that. If i can't brush I use mouth wash instead. If I can only floss once a week, its better than nothing at all. If I remember to brush in the middle of the day I just do it at that time instead of waiting till later. Having this mentality has improved my teeth and honestly helped me get over the overwhelm multiple times. I've been having better dental visits because of it.
I've found the following works for me.
1) I increased the number of times per year I visited the dentist. I think this is something everyone should do (I understand the cost involved), but once or twice a year is honestly too long. For one you get lazy between visits, that impending doom clock being shorter can help with motivating your care. Believe me the cost of the extra visits and even getting floried far outweighs that of a crown, fillings, and other dental surgeory needed in terms of lessoning cost. I'd also think Dental Insurance should re-orient themselves around at least encouraging this sort of frequent visit model to help save themselves money. This will help you better understand where you're getting lazy as your dentist will let you know.
2) This will help with the bordem in my opinion. A good electric tooth brush should be the start of your evening, but I've found that flossing is the most important. changing up the flossing routine with a water pick, string, and those weird finger gadgets can help change things up. Bare minimum floss with one of these things, but try to hit them all. Cahnge the side you start with each night or every couple of nights. You have 4 quandrants to work with. Even just over focusing on one quadrant and lazily working on the other 3 and rotating the starting order goes a long way based on my own visits.
3) Mouth wash in the mourning. ADHD in the morning especially if you're not a morning person can be rough. You're trying to get your brain together so it knows what's up. Mouth wash at a minmum even if you end up brushing again 15 to 20 min later goes a long way. Kills those night time germs, your teeth should be clean from the night before. At the very least you'll have a little something to at least help.
4) Don't brush before bed. Brush after dinner if possible. If you're out late, brush as soon as you get through the door. The same thing that gets you the morning will get you at night in reverse order. It's fine to hold off a bit for a desert or snack, but set a cut off time. When you're tired your brain is just going to lazy out on you while flossing or helping you hit those critical regions in your mouth such as hitting all the surface area, getting your gums, and of course your tongue.
if you have a child with ADHD, I recommend getting them started on a similar routine. It'll haunt them once they are on their own.
For most people in the US, at least, (1) is often impossible. I didn't go to the dentist for the better part of 15 years because I couldn't afford insurance *and* couldn't afford the absolutely ludicrous fees, which led to a lot of really bad teeth.
Everything else here is great advice.
@RvLeshrac You can always call local colleges and ask if they have dental students that do free cleanings for class credit. That's what my mom did for us when we were little. You can even call around to clinics and see if they do any "pro bono" cleanings. They get to write those off of taxes. I know it likely adds to the already building levels of embarrassment, but it could save some teeth!
I under this very well. I also have ADHD. I have spent $10,000 on dental work as well within last 3years - root canals, crowns, implants. What changed is that I married my wife 3yrs ago - and she is very encouraging and supportive. She wants me to take care of me.
So applicable. I just made a dentist appointment for a teeth cleaning for the first time in a year or two, then I saw this video! Thank you for undoing the shame I’ve been feeling recently!!
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Thank you. Thank you thank you thank you. I had SO much dental and orthodontic work done on my teeth growing up and people used to always compliment how incredible my teeth are. But in my 20s/30s, I've really, REALLY let them go. Going years between cleanings, skipping basic care at home... and I'm dreading an upcoming appointment because (a) my lifelong family dentist passed away in 2021 so now I have to go somewhere new, and (b) I know for a fact I have a serious cavity (if not something worse) on a molar plus some gum recession.
But the shame is so real. People who aren't neurodivergent (or "neurospicy" as my best friend calls it) don't understand just how hard it is for us to survive every day and be "normal".
Omg thank u for this! I've never been able to explain why it's hard. For me I believe it's a texture and taste thing. I use a sillacon toothbrush which works for me.
Yessssss! Texture and taste is such a common thing I see mentioned, it's awesome you found something that works for you!
@@HowtoADHD somewhat works 😂. Better than other stuff but still not ideal.
I have ADHD, chronic fatigue, and chronic pain. I’ve had braces and a retainer etc. my teeth have gon back a bit and it’s really frustrating. I only brush once, and I barley floss. However, I used to do none of it, and I’m proud of myself for getting where I have gotten. One thing that’s really helped me is an electric toothbrush. It’s a bit more expensive, but it helps get your teeth cleaner for the times you do clean your teeth. Thank you for making me feel think I’m not alone in my struggle!!
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A couple things worth mentioning: One, we also are more likely to get dry mouth from stimulant medication, which can increase how quick cavities form. Second, a lot of the numbing agents used for dental procedures are made less effective by stimulant medications, so it's often wise to not take stimulants before a dental procedure so they can get you adequately numb.
I'm extremely good about brushing and flossing and I still have to deal with a lot of dental problems, so sometimes it's not even our fault. Do the best you can and don't bully yourself for the problems you have with teeth; they may not even be your fault.
My best dental hack is just always scheduling my next dental appointment when I leave the current one. Some offices have you do this as a matter of standard prodecure, but if not, you can always just make sure you do it on your way out. Any time I've moved cities it's taken me a few years to get around to finding a new dentist, but once I've made that first appointment the system is foolproof. It probably does help that the dentist I saw growing up did it this way, so I associate leaving the dentist with making an appointment, so I never seem to forget on my way out, it's just part of the exiting procedure for me. But you could always add a reminder on your phone to remind you on your way out.
I love the floss picks around the house idea! Will have to give that one a try
Ha, this one hits home. I'm currently having to drop a significant chunk of change to fix the mistakes of my young self. One thing my Dentist mentioned was that apparently for some people, Methylphenidate medications can cause gum swelling, which when paired with inconsistent dental care over the years leads to...really expensive and uncomfortable visits as an adult.
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Within the past couple of months, I have finally started trying to get caught up with my teeth. I found an amazing dentist who is so non judgmental and kind. Unfortunately insurance sucks. I need wisdom teeth and a couple others pulled out and finding that location is proving difficult. I got my first root canal on one of my almost front teeth and then insurance denied the crown. Tomorrow I have to go see the dentist again because the entire tooth broke off in the front of my mouth. It's so shameful and so discouraging especially because I have been able to mostly hide it until now.
Thank you for this. I hate that you are also struggling but thank you for your brave honesty. Thank you for letting us know we aren't alone.
Hey Jessica! I can't believe how much I can relate to your experience. I've also got (autism) an aversion to strong tastes like mint. Once I realised it was actually okay (and possible!) to get flavour free paste, I actually developed a habit. Never understood why I couldn't prior to diagnosis. Anyway, good teeth or bad, you're an invaluable, wonderful person. Carry on taking good care of yourself. PS. The flossing idea is genius!!! ❤
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@@adhdcentral ???
@@AH-auDHD reminder to stay hydrated
@@adhdcentral 😅😅😅🤣🤣🤣🤣 thank you!
Oh, one of my people. I hate mint. (Also the smell of it.). It’s so hard to get non-menthol flouride toothpaste. It stopped me from cleaning my teeth as a kid, and it was only after my mother bought me fruit flavoured toothpaste that I got into the habit of cleaning. I’m grateful she realised!
I struggle with a lot of shame around this subject too, and I really appreciate your vulnerability and encouragement!
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I'm so glad this video came out today. I'm going to talk to a doctor about seeking an ADHD diagnosis in a couple hours (an appointment it took me three years to get around to making....) And I've been thinking a lot lately about why brushing my teeth is so arduous. My current dentist is really nice. I'm in my 30s but when I get into that horrid little chair I immediately turn into a crying little kid because I'm anticipating all the pain and discomfort that comes with dental visits. When I had to get a cavity filled, they gave me a pink blanky and one of those foam squishy toys that looked like a pair of dentures (which I promptly sqwoze the life out of) and they were so patient with me. A big barrier to brushing my teeth regularly for me is that I always ALWAYS gag or dry-heave and I haven't found a way to prevent this yet, and it just builds up dread. I like your idea for keeping floss picks around as a fidget, and I have about six million tiny mason jars, I think I'm going to try that. Thank you so much for all the work you do on these videos. I found your channel because I wanted to better understand a dear friend who had recently been diagnosed with very severe ADHD, and I've discovered so much about myself too along the way. Every new video you post comes with a sense of realization, and being seen and understood in a way I've never felt before. So even if my doctor's visit today doesn't go well, it's comforting to know that all these people are here discovering things about themselves together. Thank you for all your hard work.
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Mint toothpaste makes me gag and dry heave. Have you tried a non-menthol toothpaste? Finding unflavoured toothpaste made things so much easier for me.
I’m glad you’ve found a supportive dentist too. ❤
Thanks for modelling how to speak about something that 'ought' to be easy and just isn't. Helpful beyond dentistry!
Something I really struggle with about cleaning my teeth is actually the taste of the toothpaste or the feel of the toothbrush. I have tried sooo many toothpastes and I only like 1. It’s even meant for 6 - 9 year olds. One thing I learned is that the age doesn’t even matter and it has the same amount of fluorine so it doesn’t matter that much. I also find that there are apps that are meant for little kids but they have fun things like a character and every few times you clean your teeth you will unlock some new backdrop or outfit piece and that really encourages me because I’m getting rewards for cleaning my teeth. They do like a funny dance that you can do with the character and it’s really fun and makes you less bored. There are loads of different ones to choose from and I would really recommend.
Fidgeting with the floss IS THE MOST GENIUS IDEA I'VE HEARD THIS WEEK!!!!
Jessica, I'd love to hear more about your bedtime wind down routine! I struggle with sleeping well and just found out about "delayed sleep phase syndrome". Thanks for all that you do!
Thank you for covering this. I so empathize with everything you've said here. My partner and I both have ADHD, and we're both having teeth issues that we're having trouble dealing with. He is on government dental insurance, which adds another row of bricks to the wall of awful for him. Only a handful of places will take government dental insurance in our city, and finding one can be a real challenge. It can take hours of calling around getting lots of negative results. It's really frustrating! Because of this, he has been putting off going to the dentist for literal years until the other day one of his teeth just fell out of his mouth. He couldn't put it off anymore. My heart went out to him as he called place to place trying to find anyone who could take him in. After two hours of looking, he finally found a dentist that would do a cleaning and would pull the tooth. No other dental work is really covered, so once that is finished, we will have to go through the process of shopping around for a different dentist or seeing if this one has an affordable payment plan to do the bridge out of pocket. My teeth need work too, but they aren't quite as bad. I have dental insurance but I haven't been to the dentist in more than 20 years so... I'm scared and ashamed. I still have 25 year old cement on the back of two of my teeth from a "permanent" retainer that fell off about a year after hey put it on.
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Thank you SO MUCH for talking about this. I've felt shame for so long, far before I got my ADHD diagnosis. It's so hard to brush my teeth twice a day, much less doing anything else. And the assumption in almost every place is that you can easily brush twice a day, and if you're not, then it's your fault... and we're not going to tell you how to make it easier.
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@@adhdcentralPosting the same thing on every comment is spam and overly obsessive.
@@Myrrdin12 its a reminder for people individually
Something that was an eye opener for me a few years back was discovering that the whole "brush twice a day for 2 minutes" routine isn't backed by anywhere near as much research as you'd expect.
Keeping a neutral pH in the mouth and a balance of good bacteria vs. bad is just as important as traditionally brushing.
So instead of worrying about brushing when it's not convenient, keep a small bottle of mouthwash handy and you'll get a lot of the same benefits. I like the little 2oz travel spray bottles because you can easy spray a few times to get enough to rinse.
The most discouraging thing for me brushing my teeth is that, nowadays from chronic neglect, every time i try to brush them...they bleed.
I actually floss more frequently than i brush because it's easier to floss the crud that stuck between the teeth than brush them.
I relate so deeply to your experiences, this video truly means more than I can say. No one has ever spoken about these types of dental health struggles, and I've felt so alone and ashamed of how badly I do. I also have genetically bad teeth, so the problem of not seeing clear results {still getting cavities} when I was able to keep up with my dental care has made it SO much harder to convince myself this is worth dealing with. I'm also in the beginning of trying to heal this part of my life, I actually have my second cavity filling in a few hours. I have the added fear of needles in my mouth, which also brings It's own form of shame to the table, that makes it even harder.
But I'm trying, and so are you, and it's not easy for either of us. And that's okay.
I'm sorry I sort of just started rambling lol, but it really is comforting to know that this is hard for other people too. We're in this together. And we've got this
I watched this yesterday actually and can’t get it out of my head. I was just officially diagnosed this summer I had been toying with testing sooner but I felt shame in it. I thought maybe I was too old to even think about it.
I’ve been watching your videos for some time and every time I do, I go, oh wow it’s not just me.
I watched this video in tears yesterday because this is me. I haven’t been to the dentist in around 10 years and before I stopped going I was always needing stuff fixed. Honestly I haven’t even went for a check up at the doctor in about that time too as I now feel like it’s been so long and that’s shameful too.
Anyway, I just want to say thank you for being brave enough to talk about things like this because it really helps.
Oh, thank you so much for this. I used to think I was the only person in the world who could positively hate brushing their teeth and it embarrased me enormously, until I realised it was ADHD-related: an overwhelming sensory overload. Buying a toothpaste with salty flavour did wonders for me. I keep forgetting about flossing though. Using it as fidgeting could be the solution!
water reminder patrichalosapedero
Thank you so much for sharing about this. Ive been struggling for years with shame about my teeth and just felt defeated. As a young adult I've struggled to make and keep up with appointments at the dentist and I could never explain why. I'm going to show this to my mom later and I so happy to be able to articulate what Im feeling.❤
I know that this video is spurred by your personal struggle with dental care, but as a neurodivergent licensed optician, an eye care video with tips on how to make that ADHD friendlier would be sublime! ❤❤
You are the absolute OG of ADHD! Your videos have extended my life by 5 years and counting. Talking about this stuff matters in ways that you can't imagine!!. Nightmares of dentist drills and blinding lights can linger for decades. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!
water reminder johnarnold
So this is a video i actually recently went looking for recently on your channel. I have adhd and so obviously routines like this are hard and so i actually appreciate this video because caring for my teeth usually goes on the back burner. this channel has genuinely helped me in so many ways :)
Thank you so much for speaking up about this! I have experienced a lot of shame from not being able to consistently do what seems so easy for others, ie brushing my teeth. It's good to know I'm not the only one. Maintenance is so hard when you can't executive function! And for the record, when I had my retainer I had to fish it out of the trash (or get it replaced entirely) more than a few times! 😅
Thank you so much for sharing this. It really helps a lot to feel less alone with this. I also really struggle with taking care of my teeth (among other things), and it really helps to know that I'm not the only person in the world struggling with this. I don't need to be ashamed, that only makes things worse. It is okay. Brushing teeth for 10s is still better than not brushing them at all :)
water reminder ree-inventing
Thank you for talking about this! I’ve been procrastinating going to the dentist. I’ve hit a couple of bad ones that were pretty judgmental. It’s just hard to take care of your teeth sometimes.
water reminder ghostcat
OMG this was posted perfectly in time for me. Thank you for posting this. I struggle with taking care of my teeth, too. I'm super thankful and lucky that my parents took me to cleanings & fluoride treatments regularly when I was a kid. I've had no trauma around going to the dentist, and yet I struggle with going as an adult and I feel so dumb about it... Thank you again.
water reminder
@@adhdcentral Ooo, a hydro-homie! Thank youuuu!
@@missunderstoodmaniac hydrohomie .. i like that
Having broken a wisdom tooth during a financial rock bottom, and having just found a suitable dentist right before moving countries to a place where 80% of the people do not speak a language I can properly express myself in I find this both very relatable and encouraging. I still have to make the flight back to have my wisdom teeth extracted in my home country because I 100% will not be able to do it without a autism friendly dentist I can actually communicate with and feel I can trust. I feel so bad it's been over a year but this makes me feel a lot better
I've had lots of issues with my teeth over the years. As a kid, even when I did everything right, a trip to the dentist could seriously screw me up. I had braces, was diligent about using my retainer, brushed and flossed, but still got cavities, chipped teeth, etc. The trauma I experienced at the dentist didn't help, especially since I am afraid of needles and, being allergic to sulfa medication, meant that instead of just one or two shots of numbing meds, it would be 5 or 6 shots, and they never actually waited long enough for it to start working before drilling. Did you know that most numbing agents take 15 minutes to start being effective? Yeah, they never wait, just stab you with the needle and start drilling, meanwhile I'm panicking, in pain, and crying.
It's part of why whenever sedation was offered - such as for wisdom teeth extraction - I took them up on it. Put me under with just one needle? Yes please.
Mint toothpaste wakes me up _and_ makes me hungry, so I hate brushing my teeth at night, but I had recently switched to bubblegum flavor toothpaste and that's been more helpful. I had been scared off other flavor toothpastes for a long time after trying this "orange flavor" toothpaste for adults like 20 years ago - it tasted like a dirty orange peel - but after trying different flavors I've found kid's toothpastes tend to work for me. For better hygiene, you should floss before brushing, but hey, at least flossing at some point during the day is a step in the right direction.
water reminder erischaos
I love how you posted this because this is exactly what I’m going through I’m missing a tooth too ! I was open and honest with my dentist and they are so understanding! They always work with me too!
I really appreciate your channel and you talking about stuff like this and being so open and honest to us. It really helps me feel less alone and more understood and less like a bad person because of the sometimes negative consequences of my ADHD symptoms. I had braces for a long time too and have retainers now, but my teeth have shifted some because I didn't wear them as consistently as I should have and sometimes I feel guilty about that. I also struggle with flossing and brushing my teeth. I got an electric toothbrush recently and those flosser picks you showed and those have made a big difference in how often I'm able to care for my teeth. I also like water picks too. I am 19 and it has been insanely difficult for me to make progress towards being a self sufficient adult. School did a lot of damage to me. It lowered my self confidence, my confidence in my intelligence, it felt like cruel and unusual torture for neurodivergent people, and I was super sleep deprived and burned out for multiple years. I barely have any energy. I was diagnosed with ADHD a few months ago, although I've known I have it for years. I was hoping to be able to be treated with the classic ADHD medication(s) because I've seen how much of a difference it's made for other ADHD people, but because I have a very mild rare congenital heart defect, I am only allowed to have generic wellbutrin. It has made me feel less depressed, but it hasn't helped my ADHD and I feel like I'm dragging myself through tar to do anything productive, even something small like washing dishes. I still live with my parents, and I am trying I really am to make money on my own, but because of my sensory sensitivities ( I'm also autistic) and the fact that I learn more slowly, the typical teen/young adult entry level jobs are a nightmare for me. I am going to start a freelance work-from-home job soon which should be ideal for me, but it is hard to get started and it makes me nervous because it's new and more serious responsibility. I know logically that everyone makes mistakes and it's ok and that's how we learn, but my emotions won't listen to my logic and I feel pathetic every time I make a mistake or fail at something. My best hasn't been enough for so long, sometimes I feel like I'll never really be an adult, living on my own happily, with a job where I make enough money to sustain myself. My progress is so slow, it's just discouraging. It is nice to have RUclips channels like this that make me feel more normal, at least among neurodivergent people. Thank you, and I hope you do better too. ❤
Thank you so much for talking about this!
I've also struggled taking care of my teeth consistently, which led to a cavity and now a broken tooth. Between finances and shame I still haven't gotten it taken care of yet. I'm going to try these ADHD-friendly tips to try to get back on track and hopefully see a dentist soon.
Don't know if I have ADHD for sure, but I definitely identify with everything here, and it's good to know I'm not the only person who struggles with this. Thanks for sharing!
daily water reminder
@@adhdcentral Can't stand water.
@@martineyles rip
@@martineylesI used to have trouble with water. I now drink it chilled and I can’t get enough. I hope you find what works for you!
The Water Pic is amazing. It’s been a blessing for me to buy this three years ago.
Thank you for posting this vulnerable video! Dental care is something I really struggle with daily so knowing I’m not alone with this struggle is so helpful!! I’m not diagnosed but am quite certain I have adhd because of a lot of your content revealing the various struggles in my life that I thought was just me being rubbish at being a human. But I’m beginning the process of getting assessed at the end of the year!
water reminder findinglauren
This video made feel so heard! I’ve been struggling with it for years and it’s one of the main things I’m working on with my therapist. Alarms on my phone have helped some.
I subscribed in 2018 or 2019, and have really enjoyed that content this whole time.
That said, I think this might be the most relatable one yet. It really seems like Jessica is able to give us more actionable tips and relate to us better than any other channel I have found so far.
I preordered the book on kindle, and can’t wait to see what it is like. :)
Thank you so much for making this video… i finally made a dentist appointment today. I’m finally able to watch this because I’ve been avoiding this video like I was the dentist… no more!! We literally have the same issue, down to the missing filling with the tooth that needs pulled. It does feel embarrassing… but I feel so seen and supported because of this video! Thank you again
Wow. This is 1000% my experience. Thanks for sharing. Also super floss works for the permanent retainer too!
The problem for me is the disconnect between thinking "I should" and doing. I can literally go to the toilet, do my business, look at the sink and stuff on it, think "I should wash my teeth", and STILL walk away. Not even "can", it just happens. And I don't know how to break that disconnection.
water reminder for ihmislehma
@@adhdcentral I am admittedly confused now.
@@ihmislehma reminder for you to stay hydrated
@@adhdcentral Why? I never said drinking water is an issue.
@@ihmislehma completely unrelated to the comment .. i remind people to drink water
I have pretty resilient teeth (thanks, Mom) but I've had such traumatic dentist experiences that I cannot get myself to the dentist. But I like your comment about enlisting friends and community to help. I think I might actually need to ask a friend to help me by sitting me down to make an appointment and then driving me to the dentist. It's that terrifying.
Thank you for this validation. I have a morning routine now for dental hygiene but evenings are rough. I totally resonate with needing to go to bed when I'm tired and not waking myself back up with chores.
Thank you for talking about dental care and it's relationship to adhd. I have the same struggles. Having anxiety I grind my teeth and unfortunately didn't catch it early enough when I was younger now my teeth are ground down and I hate it; it is my number one insecrity. I feel overwhelmed by the cost and work that needs to be done not to mention finding a dentis. So thank you for addressing these issue plus I now feel like I am not the only one who struggles with these kind of issues. ❤
I'm 40 and I have struggled with my dental health my whole life. My most recent broken tooth happened on my wedding anniversary. I just got another permanent crown. I feel your pain. You are not alone. I'm glad you found such a good dentist. When you have a relationship with your dentist it makes it easier to want to go. I also try to make my next appointment while I'm still standing in the office and put it in my calendar with an alarm. Every time I move or change jobs I need to find a new dentist, which is the hardest thing.
Are crowns functional? Can you chew with them? I have two broken molars. It’s really nice hearing about this topic I’ve been really anxious about my teeth lately. I’m 28 and really want to prevent more damage.