Girls Gone Bible’s Extremely Toxic Relationship Advice
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- Опубликовано: 14 окт 2024
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The entire discussion between the three of them delved into new deeper levels of stupid, far beyond I what I could imagine is capable by human beings.
You seem like bitter people
Brainwash Western 😂😂😂feminist is talking
@@aureum7479 by pointing out hypocritical cultish mentality???
@hellsonly8908 Thank you!!!
"A man who acts like a man, who's manly" - me as a closet lesbian when asked what my type is
My mind just immediately went to Mulan "It's my name and it's a boy's name too."
Raymond Holt pretending to be straight
Oh no, my fanfic that Girls Gone Bible started through a romcom series of misunderstandings about their feelings for each other is seeming more likely
When women say they want something different, Christians assume there's something wrong with them and it usually leads to judgment.
😂
“i dont go to a cow and ask what an egg is like, its a totally different type of dairy” excuse me? 😭
🤦🏽♀️
Yes, eggs aren’t dairy. Additionally, farm animals cannot verbalize descriptions of anything. Lastly, when are people going to stop dehumanizing women? They’re people, not cars or chicken eggs or dairy cows or horses or plates or whatever animal/object that’s unnecessarily used to describe something about women.
Everything in the refrigerated section of the grocery store is dairy I guess.
EGGS ARE NOT A DAIRY PRODUCT
For some reason a lot of boomers and gen x were taught that eggs are a dairy products. Also at the store the dairy area usually has eggs. If I can remember right, it stems from before accurate chemistry and the fact people who have egg allergies usually can't eat milk as well.
People will say "I'm setting my boundaries" and then set those "boundaries" very far inside of the boundaries of another person. Saying "you have to submit to me" isn't a boundary, it's toxic levels of control
Yeah it's like the other boundaries that manosphere types say they set like, their girlfriend can't have male friends, have a career job, reject demands for s*x, question his authority etc.
Fundamentalist Christianity is the original manosphere gift.
Yep! Tired of the term 'boundary' being used to exert control rather than communicate wants and needs to keep yourself safe.
Its funny how they claim they want a man to do all the planning and thinking, but the reality of the division of labour in traditional households is that women have to plan, execute and make all the decisions that keep a household functioning 😅
yes household & man take care of the hard stuff like bills, trips, etc
@@eeeeeee-hm1mq yeah right... Usually its the women who have to plan trips, pack for the five kids AND THE MANCHILD because apparently those manly men can't handle that. The "hard stuff" for traditional men is to go to an office from 9 in the morning, clock out at five and then get a homecooked meal, spend time with their homies, get a beer or watch football. A woman never gets to clock out. Who really has it hard there 😂
They want the woman to do all the work but they want all the credit.
@@Dahlily yes those man aren’t really yk… but my man works long hours and always plans trips for me and romantic dates with pleasure in his heart and i get to relax at home ? idk maybe a biblical man yes follows these but other man no that’s what the girls are talking about
@@Dahlily I think a lot of conservative Christian men do work hard and not all of them want to be in charge all the time but feel pressured to be. I don't agree with the gender role division but I wouldn't say traditional men have it easy; patriarchal systems are hard on everyone.
I get the feeling that a lot of these women regularly feel overwhelmed and scared. They're essentially looking for a father figure who will do all the hard decision making for them and protect them. They're not looking for a partner. They're looking for the parent they never had.
Or just lazy and entitled.
I think this hit the nail on the head! Ive even found myself doing this in my relationships which is totally not fair to the other person, but it happened as a result of my inability to fulfill the need for protection typically received by a parent.
@@infinitedragonbellyx.x The feelings of fear are stated pretty clearly by all the women in the video. The redhead in particular shares how hyper aware she is in public without a man. The relationship dynamic between the couple does nothing but reinforce this sense of dependency (Guy host constantly making references to protecting his gf from mugging or assault, rambling on about how every woman that doesn’t want to be submissive will be unhappy in life).
It’s more likely these women are keen to enjoy the experience of existing in public without maintaining the hyper vigilance that women (especially young women) are forced to adopt as a result of men’s regular harassment of women and girls who “dare” to enter public spaces.
Men’s harassment of women and girls in public is a dehumanizing experience that’s ubiquitous as well as frequent-for some women, it can be an almost daily experience. It’s also a constant threat because men’s harassment can and does happen in all public spaces. Additionally, these men may choose to escalate their harassment if they’re unhappy with a woman’s response to a man’s initial form of harassment.
All these factors combine to force women to be hyper vigilant in public; this is exhausting and oppressive. It’s unsurprising that these women enjoy a reprieve from this hyper vigilance, which they experience when they’re accompanied by a man.
@@infinitedragonbellyx.x We’re all entitled to feel safe.
Well apparently I’m not very feminine. I want a man I can have intelligent conversations with but also the freedom to make my own decisions. It’s scary to think of putting everything on my partner.
I can understand wanting a partner you can trust so much that you could turn off your brain and trust that you'd end up in a safe and enjoyable place. As a hypothetical, not as an actual plan for the evening. "I trust you so much that I could do this. I am not doing it, though, because brain".
I don’t get how they desire to not want to make their own decisions. They’re literally advocating for their opinions to not be taken into account.
Right? It's fucking weird and scary. Like, I trusted my former boyfriend to make major decisions, and if it came down to it I was fine letting him decide things like where to eat or what to do that day, but it wasn't like, _necessary?_ He didn't have some kind of headship over me where I HAD to follow his "orders" on those things, I could make any decision I wanted myself. I understand wanting to be able to trust your partner with making decisions for you GENERALLY, as like a just in case thing or something, but wanting to literally turn your brain off and have a man dictate to you what your entire life has to be like is fucking bizarre. How do these women not want to have the most basic agency in their own lives??
@meej33 I think that protection thing is appealing to me as a small ELEMENT of a relationship, but not as an entire dynamic that influences how I act and the decisions I make
@@llynxfyremusic But is it about protection or is it about support. I would wager it is probably more about the latter. At least, when these Christian traditionalists talk about protecting women, it is in a very disempowering and infantilising manner. I'm a guy, and I would certainly hope that my partner would do her best to protect me just as I would do my best to protect her. But in the vast majority of cases, we as well adjusted and mature adults don't need protection. We need support.
They say: “We’re equal in God’s eyes, but different in role.” I hear: "All animals are equal, but some are more equal than others." 😑
Loved that book and also true
💀💀💀
Same!!
The whole "separate but equal" idea they would use during Jim Crow Era. Yeah. It's never equal.
@LucyMwangi-qg3dx Except that we're not a single body part with one clear job to do, or animals living only by their survival instincts. We're human beings. We are complex and we are individuals. There's no role in life that will fit every person of a certain gender. Our ability to understand things about ourselves and to make choices about who we want to be is one of the most amazing things about humanity.
Taylor's makeup always looks so good. It might be funny to give Drew a "biblical" makeover for a video one day.
Lol thank you!
@@theantibotincorporating it as a goof into a response would be killer 😭
Make sure to watch the Girl Defined video that teaches how to do it in a God honouring way 😂 "I am fiercer than thou, and holier than thou!" 😂
I second this!
I would love that video if Drew was down for it.
If I want to “turn my brain off,” I watch an episode of Emily in Paris. I’m not about to blindly follow whatever my husband says. That’s sad, imo
As a Christian I would like to also point out, that according to Christianity God is supposed to be on the top of the list of your authorities. Including for women. Husband is not supposed to be num.1. God is. So if the husband is going against God's rules she has a right (some would even say duty, but I understand that it's not always easy) to not listen to him.
I understand that people have different opinions about God, religion, etc., but it surprised me that the conservative believers are not talking about it. Because THIS IS part of religious life.
@@julkap4190religion is anti women nothing much
"I just want to turn my brain off". I think the key word is "Just" Imho she turned her brain off along time ago!
She is confusing her husband with a cult leader.
“Men are more organized and aware…” except when it’s house work, cooking, child care, or any other things women are expected to do as a christian wife
(edit: to be clear I don’t mean this in a gender essentialism way, I mean it in a “these traits are attributed to mean when it suits them, but actively unattributed when it’s time to do chores or help with the house” kind of way)
Then a lot of them become big goobers who need stuff done for them, so many of them that it's a sitcom trope
As a man who was raised by my parents to understand that when you're with someone, it is a partnership, I find it utterly bizarre that there are so many men who are phobic towards basic knowledge skills and aptitudes for self-sufficiency, home and household management and child rearing. Any grown men who seriously believe that those tasks are beneath them as a absolute matter of gender superiority, they are incredibly immature, ill developed adults. And I think each run the risk of being looked back upon as, "voted most likely to become an abuser".
Na habibi miss me with that I do work help in home with kids give her time oh and yes I married a Muslima I ditched my fellow Christian women because they didn’t want to help
@@llynxfyremusic☠️
Not all men are organized or responsible! My cousin was married to a guy who was terrible at money. Nothing ever got paid off.
I grew up in a Muslim family, and my father demanded submission, so I just left him and his religion behind and moved on. Now that I'm in charge of my life and being the "Alpha😂" of my own life, I've never felt better ❤.
Btw, is moaning on RUclips biblical?😅
Uhhh probably not
Probably depends on who is moaning and who or what they are moaning about. There's plenty of biblical RUclips channels that devote their time to moaning about various Culture War bogeyman they have constructed. Always got to be scared or furious about something. And the Bible and God is the solution. Not the reprieve, however; because the fear and the anger will only increase with belief.
As a Christian I'll say... No, definitely not, at least not on public and not like that 😅. I noticed that, too. It was so weird, fake and trying to sale Christianity like a porn 😅
By the way good for you. I'm a little bit upset that Muslimism, conservative Christianity (and probably some other religions) preach about submission to your partner THAT much, because religion is supposed to be about praising your God and being a good person, and they are ruining it... but I'm glad that you are doing well 🙂❤
I'll tell you why he brought them. He has three gorgeous woman saying "yes" to everything he says. Talk about a dopamine high. It was purely for his ego.
They didn't say yes to everything. They moaned it very s*xually 😉
I’m sorry. Him calling his wife a “bitch” is KILLING me! I would be humiliated if my partner called me a bitch and said they would leave me to die by an armed robber if I didn’t blindly submit to their orders.
"The devil can't take away something god has given you." Huh, Job might have something to say about that.
Mother friggers don’t read their book lol
The Lord blessed him with twice as much in the end- did you even read the whole book of Job?
@@hannahcorinne4188his stuff still got taken away, though.
@@hannahcorinne4188 you missed the point
@@hannahcorinne4188I mean ... Did he even undo killing Job's children?
"I don't go to a cow to ask HIM how eggs are. It's just, to me, it's a different dairy product." Wtf even was that entire statement. Cows are not HIMS, and eggs are not dairy products. Already any validity this guy may have had with me is thrown out the window with that one statement.
No it makes sense. The bovine is trans masc, and the eggs are actually young cows who haven’t come out as trans yet. But just because he’s trans doesn’t mean he can speak for all trans cows, because cows don’t speak, cows moo.
@@oceanmariep256 That's awesome! Got me to chuckle when I'm not supposed to be one my phone!
@@oceanmariep256 Your comment makes infinitely more sense than any right-wing rationalization.
@@oceanmariep256I'd also say that he shouldn't moo for all trans cows for the most part, since they're individuals
@@oceanmariep256So he's assigned cow at birth, but identifies as a bull. That's cool. Respect.
The whole "guy protects you, so you can turn your brain off and be subservient" reminds me a lot of what gangs used to do and often still do in some large cities. Where they force businesses to pay them "protection money." When the gangs themselves are the only thing the business needs to be protected from in the first place.
Extortion is such an encouragement comparison but as someone who escaped a fundamentalist cult, most women were brainwashed into believing they were not abused at all.
Bingo. These women are expressing their desire to enjoy the reprieve from hyper vigilance which is induced by men’s harassment of women in public. Men tend to refrain from harassing a woman who’s accompanied by a man.
"I'm here to protect you."
"From what?"
"From what I'm gonna do to you if you don't submit to my demands."
@@AD-dg3zz Right?!? They make it sound like so much danger is out there to be protected from. In reality, THEY are the danger. lol
Ah, these gangs sound like regular messianic figures! How godly it is, to save innocent people from getting punished by you, as a free gift that only costs their life savings. (This is a satirical jab.)
I relate to Drew with the utter disbelief that there are people over the age of 12 who unironically use the word "alpha" to describe themselves.
Someone calling themselves an "alpha" usually means they cry the loudest, and accuse others of "cheating" when someone beats them at something.
Me too. Cringe
Me too in relation to the disbelief. That is a good point. The term 'alpha' is being used a lot by people I wouldn't want to be around. If someone really is a quality person they don't have to tell me who and what they are, it's in how they treat people.
As if getting home and having to manage the household, take care of kids, prepare meals is somehow "turning your brain off".
The idea is probably to be rich and pay other people to do that, so you can play house without doing the actual work.
Its privileged compared to trying to deal with the workforce
@@AWeeCuntfromLiverpoolHow so?
@@AWeeCuntfromLiverpool "Its privileged compared to trying to deal with the workforce": It's really not. For the women it's like betting to win the lottery but never actually winning it, because they set themselves up for poverty, especially when they are old and can't work anymore. Also they are exclusively dependent on the grace of their husband. If he ever leaves - which happens a lot, because men love replacing their wife with someone younger every once in a while - she is financially ruined instantly and she probably doesn't even have a skill or any work experience. She'll be lucky to have a high school diploma and a job at walmart or amazon after that.
@@AWeeCuntfromLiverpoolprobably depends on what kind of job you have, and whether you enjoy it… I love being home with my daughter and managing my home, but that drives a lot of other women nuts
"This sounds like a kink thing" exactly what it sounds like. As a consenting adult who participates in a power exchange relationship, that is exactly what she is describing without the boundaries and healthy limits.
Thank you both for enduring and dissecting problematic reasoning of people who want to lead others to the "cult" that I'm still trying to escape mentally.
Yeah that's what I'm saying its kink play without healthy guard rails mostly because they don't know that they're engaging in something that can huge those rails. And beyond that they're out there saying this is the right way everybody should live and the proper God ordained structure of a relationship. There's a parallel universe where somebody's on a podcast describing petplay and rope play saying that every man should be an obedient rope puppy and if they aren't they're making God cry without considering that people already do that for fun and don't build their spiritual identity around it and aren't enforcing it on others
That’s what I keep thinking. It’s giving “domestic discipline” rationale.
No, it is not kink, it's abuse. Doms don't tell their subs that God wants them to live this way and if they don't they might go to hell. As soon as you bring God into the picture, it becomes coercive.
@@sun1one1 of course it's actually abuse. Nobody's saying it's healthy kink even in traditional kink people can use it for abuse. As I said it feels like some people are saying this is a thing I'm into that everybody else should also be into but because they think it's a mandate from God and not just a fun pass time there aren't any guard rails like safe words or check ins.
The problem is that in most parts of the world this isn't just an individual kink, but a systemic problem.
Sounds like the women on that show have anxiety and unhealthy coping skills and the guy is insecure so has to externalize his fantasy to make himself feel strong.
The way this guy talks about providing blah blah for a woman reminds me of how one would treat an animal. Like when a dog runs into the street and the owner shouts for it to come back, expecting obedience for safety sake. That's not how to treat a whole adult human 🙄
Agreed? Also is the expectation that is she did the same thing in a dangerous scenario, he would not listen to her???
Thank you so much for talking about Girls gone bible. They make me so unconfortable, and they say dangerous things to a young and/or vulnerable audience.
I'd love to see another analysis about Ashley Hetherington (I know there's already a video about her on this channel), who was in GGB recently. Her content is quite disturbing and obsessive lately.
what have they said that’s dangerous? don’t settle? don’t be mean to those who are mean to you? be kind to everyone? read ur bible? what’s so dangerous
Oh, I wouldn't have anything to say against them if it was only about this.
No, they can say some worrying things about mental health for example. Generally speaking, I find that their videos lack intellectual rigor. It's often very emotional and binary, and lacks the perspective we need to talk about important subjects.
@eeeeeee-hm1mq I'm a Christian and I don't feel safe with the kind of rhetoric they spread, from the thought of "I need a man to be protected" can be true but it can also cause that man that you rely on to start abusing you and now you have no one to rely on apart from him. Many many talking points that seem to make sense can easily be exploited or debunked very quickly.
@@eeeeeee-hm1mqdid you watch the video? Are you serious?
@@katie8325 yes i watched the video 🙃 nun wrong w not supporting baby murdering, loving God, and gender roles
What women wants varies so drastically from woman to woman. However, a common thread is communication, safety, and a real partner.
Equal partner, not someone to submit to
They’ve been told this so many times by women and they just will not believe it. They prefer to hate women instead.
LucyMwangi-qg3dx ya good luck be his slave
LucyMwangi-qg3dx so u should quit u tube because real trad wives don't have utube they are fully submissive to their husbands
@LucyMwangi-qg3dx ya good luck slave
The soft “mhm’s” from girls gone bible while George is talking is so gross to me after learning about the baby talk in shiny happy people. ☹️
It was annoying me soo much haha. Had to skip those parts
Felt like chucking my phone out the window can't lie😅 every five seconds too😖
Sorry, baby talk? What’s that about?
yeah it was driving me crazy, he’s saying some of the most gross shit and they’re just like “mhm, mhm” and nodding along
Right.. it sounded so gross
I'm glad you reminded us that this man is supposed to be interviewing Girls Gone Bible, because I had honestly started thinking they were interviewing him and doing a great job of drawing a lot out of him.
Both times you've featured Girls Gone Bible, I just laugh the whole time at the second woman who sounds stoned out of her mind and just adds, Mmmmm" and "Yeaaaaah" every now and then 😂
The pensive “mmmm”s at the supposed mic drop moments (but actually idiotic takes) drives me insane
To be fair, if I was on that podcast I'd pregame to get through it.
"Yeahhh, right, totally..."
*imagines cracks in the ceiling are constellations*
When they talked about being “heightened” when they’re more “masculine,” I immediately thought of the hyper vigilance you touched on later in the video. So if your two modes for your nervous system are activated and hyper vigilant OR completely turned off…that sounds like a trauma response to me. And exhausting.
As a person with mental disabilities like autism, adhd, ocd, and really bad anxiety, it sounds the exact same to me. These women need serious mental health help not a man.
Their entire ideology is based on fear, so it’s not very surprising.
Blaming everything on demons is so convenient.
Exactly. That way they never have to take responsibility for their (in)actions.
You’re the problem
@@ItsOnPaper it's like saying criticism is demonic lol.
7:21
"We want a man who acts like a man, who's manly, who takes care of things. I don't need you to kill an alligator with your hands, but I need to feel so feminine around you because you are so masculine that I can turn my brain off because I know you've got it. I trust you. I trust your intellect. I trust your character. I trust that I can close my eyes and follow you blindly and I'm gonna be happy about where I end up."
So feeling "feminine" means dumping all responsibility for your life decisions and direction on someone else?
What. The. FLICK.
You're not a little girl any more; grow up.
She is too rich to grow ever up.
I almost feel grateful that they're saying the quiet part out loud, even though it's horrifying they think that.
"Equal in value, different in role". I'm so sick of that statement.
"All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others"
Right? Especially when it's so blatantly obvious some "roles" are given more importance than others. Like the pastors and secretary they were talking about; the the pastors are considered more important but the secretary is the one making their job even possible!
Separate but equal was always clearly a lie
@@AkiAbel-wb8qh To add to this point that those roles are not equal, is that its fairly easy to replace a secretary without it being an issue, but to replace a church LEADER is a whole different story. At least in the Lutheran faith, it requires a "calling" from the parent organization and both the congregation and the new pastor need to agree.
Listening to him spew word salad to a chorus of worshipful “hmm hmms” is a special kind of hell, lol. I can’t believe that this is him interviewing them!!!
It’s infuriating to watch these women bow down and stroke this toxic man’s ego. 🤮It’s so sad because I remember being like this when I was a young evangelical. Even then I was cringing inside, but it’s how I was trained from birth to act. However, even though I was a homeschooled, preacher’s daughter, and so “sheltered “ I started asking questions about the ways the Bible sees women, and figuring out the problems with this, as a teenager! These grown women are honestly being so stupid.
I would literally rather die alone than be with a woman whose main desire in her relationship with me is to completely shut her brain off.
One of the greatest joys in my relationships is seeing my partners succeed at what they want in life, even better if I can help facilitate that. "Oh, whatever you want will make me happy"? Big 'ol nope on that one, thanks.
You can be a traditional man without being a prick
sure dont make fun of someone that fits here wants and needs or whatever you think she wants to me in my life right now i see where i can fit with this type of women but to me you guys dont raise an eyebrow to teach women like this dating nonetheless marrying so what gives what are you even talking if shes not even your type>?
@@marieeraccareiram-gk4pb @marie : Please use punctuations. Your sentence doesn't make any sense.
psychology is also talking about the effects of extreme versions of behaviors on people around you. Including extreme dominance and extreme submission. Both of them are making people angry. Extreme dominance because people don't have a space to voice their needs and opinions... and extreme submission because people want to know your opinion or what you need/makes you happy (imagine if you would be in the restaurant and you would keep saying to waiter "I'll have whatever is easy for you". Sounds annoying.).
@marieeraccareiram-gk4pb after a few read throughs I think I got your intent. To your last point, keep in mind that these content creators aren't talking about types or changing needs in phases of life. They're pretty much universally saying this is the way it should be for everyone. This is God's plan, not just their preference, and the fact that they're happy living this way is a sign they're living according to that plan. If it was just about types, yeah, sure, I'd just move on to the next person. And I do, in fact. That is very clearly not the intent, however.
I am an elderly woman who is really sad about what my generation has left to the younger generations. But when I see and hear people like you, I think, OK, things are going to be fine. These young people are intelligent, have great critical thinking skills, and are quite articulate. Bravo. Glad I ran across your podcast.
In one of the churches I went to as a kid, there was a guy we found out was a convicted child molester. He was constantly working with the youth group, and when my parents brought it up to the pastor our of concern, the pastor said they were gossiping because this man had repented and been delivered from his 'sin.' 🤦🏻♀️
Sheesh. "HE" had been delivered from his sin, but had his victims? Why ever put someone like him in a leadership role over minors again... but never let a woman youth pastor lead. Smh
Those two always sound like they only received a 5th grade education. They literally lack an adult vocabulary and have a lot of difficulty expressing themselves. I feel like I am losing intelligence when I listen to them speak.
Yes, watching them feels like looking at the personification of a man's fantasy, including the childlike brainless and high pitched voices, it truly disturbs me that these women take on these roles and think they're girl bossing.
Which two qare you talking about?
fundamentalists employ a “baby voice” for girls. it’s really wild.
@@JGarner511 Girls Gone Bible.
The thing is, I am always careful about how much blame to put upon people like that. When you are in a system, even if you weren't born into it, you become part of that system, and thus everything you do upholds that system, even if it seems that you are against it. That's how the system maintains itself and its domination over all of its respective components.
So yeah, your summation appears accurate, but at the same time those women are in a machine that will thoroughly exploit their ignorance, lack of knowledge and naivety and seek only to make those weaknesses greater.
In that respect, they are victims of the same machine that they uphold in order to victimise even more others. It is the tragedy of this situation.
It's about damn time George gets called out for his antics. What a weird dude.
The discourse of "You should pray for your man to change instead of talking to him" is so toxic because then of course it's your fault if he doesn't change. You probably weren't praying enough, or you weren't "right with God", or you aren't submissive enough, or whatever else. It's a toxic cycle where the woman beats herself up for not being a good enough Christian and the man gets off the hook again.
And if it seems like it isn’t working, you just haven’t prayed long enough and you need to be patient, because of course, God’s timing is perfect. A book I read over and over as a young Christian wife was, “The Power of a Praying Wife,” by Stormy O’Martian, and she literally says in the very first chapter, “Sometimes you have to shut up and pray.” So I did. It took me 14 years to realize my marriage was abusive.
genuinely, deeply, THANK YOU for touching a moment on the 'if you don't respect yourself' thing - It has never made sense to me that people automatically equate promiscuity with a lack of self-respect.. it's a complete lack of understanding of people's motivations and just bothers me so much when people say it
A smart man wants a woman who can handle things & isn’t basically just another child.
The impossible paradox of the Christian wife. You are diminished and treated like one of the children, but also expected to mother him.
@@Ticket2theMoonya 🤮🤮
I think the reason why so many of their points directly contradict and conflict is because, like they said at the beginning, they can speak “biblically, spiritually, and practically.” They pick and choose their advice based on what “thought category” they are currently in. Being 100% consistent in only one category would be practically inconvenient for them so they jump around to make it fit their lifestyle and personal preferences.
One of my favorite aspects of your videos is watching how you two interact. Your love is so palpable through the screen ❤
Absolutely! Love them so much 🫶🏼
Funny I noticed the same thing.
It is awful to hear men spout this stuff. Worse is how these women will go along with it. Keep shining this spotlight.
So we got men that are surveying the area constantly thinking they will be under attack, women that are so tired doing the same, thinking since they are weaker they are always under threat. SOUNDS LIKE WE GOT SOME ANXIETY FOLKS. sounds like we need to talk to a therapist and maybe get on some medication. I just feel like the church is filled with incredibly anxious people that either don’t know, or are purposely not got getting the mental help they need. Growing up in the church, this was my mom, someone who definitely was suffering from anxiety, and KNEW that because she started college with a psychology degree, but was sucked into religion, just like I assume these women, because it promised freedom from worry.
Wow that guy loves to hear the sound of his own voice
It is so validating to hear your reactions to this. My parents are super evangelical and I grew up in this culture. It helps me to hear you guys say what I’m thinking when I hear this stuff! My dad always gets triggered when one of us “questions” him. I can’t even.
I CANT WITH THE “MMMM”S
My misophonia has me in need of a rage room now for real😖😅
She's like Kristen from Girl Defined, while the guy is more like Bethy, who talks over everyone and doesn't give their co-host a chance to breathe, let alone talk.
"Turn your brain off" -- yeah, definitely a great approach to anything important.
IKR LMAO
46:07 Imagine being such a bad leader that it's a problem for you if the person you're leading questions you. That is 100% terrible leader. Leadership 101 is be able to take advice and feedback and process criticism calmly and rationally and reasonably with an open mind.
I have so many things to say but I had a visceral reaction to when you said these men fantasize about having to defend “their woman” against a violent attack. My very fundamentalist husband fantasizes about dying to protect us in “the end times.” He also glorifies dying for Christ. I’m a closet de-convert and while I can understand how you get that mentality it terrifies me now.
Thanks Taylor & Drew!
for covering so many terrible people I have never heard about!
Really personal gripe, but geez that sounds like the most lazy person in a relationship. "Oh you should do and decide everything and I'll just be here. I'm not going to participate because thats the man's role". Like nah, this is both of us. Also if masculinity is being organized, boyyyyy my ADHD has screwed me over lol
Edit: Also for the guy, bud. Do you want to a relationship partner or a doll. They're all goofballs lol
I know they come across as very lazy and expecting someone else to be responsible for every decision in their lives but I would also consider how low their self image must be if there’s so little trust in their ability to choose.
It also doesn’t help that controlling individuals will seek out partners like this and exploit the weakness, reinforcing in any way they can the dependency. The girl shares how hyper aware she is in a public environment without a man that protects her and the guy continuously rambles on about how a woman needs a man to protect her and how unhappy women that choose a different type of relationship are.
I know they come across as very lazy and expecting someone else to be responsible for every decision in their lives but I would also consider how low their self image must be if there’s so little trust in their ability to choose.
It also doesn’t help that controlling individuals will seek out partners like this and exploit the weakness, reinforcing in any way they can the dependency. The girl shares how hyper aware she is in a public environment without a man that protects her and the guy continuously rambles on about how a woman needs a man to protect her and how unhappy women that choose a different type of relationship are.
The most feminine I've ever been was during surgery... the general anesthetic totally turned my brain off !
😂
😂😂😂
you deserve way more recognition. my favorite videos on RUclips. your guys’ chemistry is so nice to see
If it’s not the person who does horrible things, it’s the demon, then what is Christ saving us from? If it’s the demon doing dark shit, and not us, those aren’t our sins, are they?
I love my brain, and I want to use it in a relationship. If a man made me feel like my brain (a.k.a my personhood) doesn't matter, I would leave.
For the love of life 🥴 who wants to “turn their brain off”. Her example of I want him to order for me, just irritates me because if my husband tried to order for me (so I could turn my brain off 🙄) I’d speak up real fast, I’m not a toddler. Especially since the type of men these gals are likely dating would probably order something yummy for themselves and get the girl a side salad and water 💀 There’s nothing cute (or freaking feminine) about playing dumb ladies! We have brains for a reason, don’t be afraid to proudly use it. Sadly the young girls seeing this, is what I worry about the most, will take much of what they say to heart.
The only part of their sentiment that is perfectly valid is their desire to feel a reprieve from the hyper vigilance women are forced to adopt as a result of men’s persistent harassment of women in public. Men tend to refrain from harassing a woman who is accompanied by a man.
Unfortunately what I’ve seen alot is that statistically more women are becoming feminists and going left whereas a lot of men are now going right. There are a lot of census and demographic studies on this. And young women are growing up in this environment where men are very viscerally reactive to feminism and so a lot of these right wing grifter ultra religious anti feminists are now seeing this and catering to these young impressionable women and saying “see? Feminism is the problem” and getting these young women to denounce feminism and reinforce patriarchy. I know a lot of young women who use this kind of language about femininity and masculinity and social roles within their life because they see these types of podcasts.
There are certainly times I decide that I don't have the bandwidth to make further decisions and ask my husband to decide dinner, etc but equally he often decides to abdicate decision to me for a time.
As someone who overthinks, I'd love to turn my brain off. But obviously these girls don't mean that in the same context that I do, and the way that they mean it, is a major ick.
Also, my mom has always played dumb too. Like, she plays up her airheaded-ness and pretends not to understand things and asks for an explanation of the most simple things (and then giggles like "hehehe I'm so clueless") because for some reason she thinks it's cute/attractive to act stupid. It's actually very cringe to witness, because she's mostly done this while talking to men
😐
I have a firm precept of mine being that if you're not assessing, be it situations, individuals, objects, actions, at any given moment, you can become an EASY target.
It's more intense when you're poor, but it can reach anyone. If I wanted to scam someone, I'd want to try it on someone who is adverse to thinking.
No wonder women in these camps are *afraid* of not landing a husband. They think that _thinking_ is unnatural for them, or even challenges in general.
lol those moans and concurring noises lol😂
If I was the one talking, I wouldn't even believe it's genuine agreement, but just yes-manning
That think about men protection sounds a lot like how mob operates 😂
When you listen to xtian apologists explain that you better love god, or you're inviting the consequences, it sounds exactly like a mafia protection racket. So, I'm not surprised that they extend that type of mafia protection style thinking to their relationship with their man.
Like: "Hey, you have a nice SELF. It would be a shame if something happened to it. That's why you need us guys around, just to make sure your pretty little self comes to no harm.
... That kind of protection doesn't come for free though. Got a few jobs for you in the meantime."
@@UberNoodle exactly!
her little “mhmhmm” every single time she speeks in in That Specific Tone has me white knuckling my phone in rage. girll try not to sound like a tradwife wojack
Ephesians 4:31-32
Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: and be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.
@@LordoftheWings-fp1wn okay and. i love a little dollop of rage. i reccomend
@@starsweepurr Ohh I thought I was speaking to a Christian. nvm! Rage away if thats your thing
@@LordoftheWings-fp1wn Welcome to the internet are you new here?
I am 50 now and a Christian. I watch your channel a lot and love both of you. You are speaking truth in a lot of ways and are respectful.
When I was younger I wanted a man who was masculine and I wanted to be submissive. When you have no real life experience, its a bit of a fantasy to think of being very submissive and feminine. As I started having some life experience and I married a man who was not a good husband and I became a single mom of a newborn, I had to be the head of the house and the idea of a non equal partner scared me to death. It made me fear marrying a godly man. Most Christian men want to be the head of the family and by my mid 30s, I couldn't imagine it anymore.
It is so so important for a woman to know their worth and to be able to be your own boss
Part of what started my questioning of Christianity was this "men are the leaders, women are the followers" shtick. I was looking around at the guys around me and they didn't seem all that more suited to leadership than the gals were. I thought, Why should I have to turn my brain off to let some guy lead?
Ugh! I hate how these girls describe femininity! I'm very intelligent and would be pissed to no end if some man tried to dumb me down, wouldn't have it! I also hated everything about being a child when I was a child and I most certainly hated anyone treating me like one as an adult. I think this is one huge issue I have with church relationship advice, when women are supposed to be infantized. My marriage is very much 50/50 sometimes I take the lead, sometimes he does, and it's all based on our own strengths.
I watched an in depth video about how basically in Christianity everyone is taught to infantalize themselves for God. I suspect this manifests in men feeling a lack of agency in that dynamic and demand submission from women and women are taught it's holy to be infantalized by everyone.
@@Ojo10 I mean that totally makes sense, even in the Bible we are to be called "Children of God". I can see how there's kind of a chain of command - pastors use the bible to control the church and it's members, men need someone to control, so their partners and kids as easy targets and women control their children - like my mom and dad did to us.
Wow. I can't believe she'd rather turn off her brain and following a man blindly than have any thoughts or opinions. Yikes!!!
No one should be submitting to anyone and the confident ignorance is insufferable.
Starting gagging at "i want to turn my brain off"
I also want to turn my brain off, but I have severe anxiety and related ADHD. So.
@@infinitedragonbellyx.x for me being able to turn my brain off around someone is being able to just quietly be in someone's company without worrying about it being "awkward"
sometimes I'll get halfway through a session with my therapist and have run out of things i want to talk about, so we both just silently draw for 30mins and it's really nice
That and the whole alpha male thing.
So many non Christian women say this tho
I'm trying to charitable: I think what they mean is they want to feel safe and not have to be hypervigilant all the time.
Like Drew said, they don't seem to have the words to express how they feel because they only know how to express themselves through patriarchy.
My husband had Alzheimer's. It's a good thing we didn't have the type of relationship that they are describing, I would have been up the creek. Women wake up! You can't assume that life will go smoothly and your partner will always be there.
💯
That's the reason why trad wife lifestyles are so dangerous. If that is what makes you happy it's great, but if the sole provider dies or just gets a illness for too long you and your kids are screwed. And if you need to get a job with a decade+ blank spot on your resume it's going to be extremely hard.
their moans and groans of approval in the video sounded so gross. this is definitely a kink thing
That's very unlikely. But that awkward moan towards the end of the video was really something 😬
Every time they played a clip and one of the women on the podcast went “mmmm…”, “yeahh”, “uhhhhm..” I got physically uncomfortable.
@@panickedshears like it's drawn out and elongated deliberately. you don't need a doctorate in subtext to understand what's going on here. this is just fetish content where a guy rambles on about being a big strong leader and the girls fawn over him.
@@De_Selby Oh they would be horrified to hear it called kink, but I do think that the reasons it appeals to them are some of the same reasons that people engage in kink. The problem is that in kink, context and consent are key, and everyone knows what they’re engaging in and when. But GGB want to take some of those same “giving up your power and putting your trust in someone else” ideas and impose it on all women, all the time.
"It's still a dictatorship, even if you're not a dick"
best quote ever.
Also "hey! we need food!" is a mood lmao
Edit: it's funny how he's talking about the women not listening and that one girl's just repeatedly saying "mhm. mhm. mhm."
like that's how I respond when I genuinely don't give af what someone is telling me, but I think for her, that's her way of expressing agreement 😅
Edit 2: I thought I heard bro say "regagitating". I was questioning if he really said that and then you confirmed that he did in fact say that. Lmao in the words of Alonzo Lerone, "get a dictionary!" 🤣
58:46 “Is she regagitating what she heard fro- no, no, no” No she’s not regagitating anything because regagitatinng is not a word.
the way they nonstop "mmm-" makes me wanna pull my hair out
I can’t with the endless MOANING from these Bible ladies.
The word submission is a trigger word for so many women who have been abused. The discussion of what masculine vs feminine is is very toxic bc it leaves no room for diversity or authenticity
The way he speaks about their relationship is hurtful. It makes it sound like she is easily disposable to him when I think a good husband truly values his wife and really doesnt want to lose her
They are in for a rude awakening when children come into the mix because women simply cannot be good mothers if they are passive and submissive. Women are leaders In the home, always have been and can also be amazing leaders in other aspects.
My partner would never order food for me even if I wanted him To. He's always said it is disrespectful to speak for a woman.
I love how knowledgeable you guys are about things. It makes me want to learn more about culture history and religion ❤
But I'm gay. I'm married to a man. So who submits? Do we draw straws? Take turns? Do we have an alpha battle?
Me and my partner (he’s gay im bi ) have Mario kart and Pokémon battles personally lol 😂
@@A1crevelee "You used COMMUNICATION on RELATIONSHIP!"
"It's super effective!"
An alpha battle sounds like a brilliant idea. But what happens when a Sigma goes against an Alpha?
Gotta team up with a lesbian couple, I guess
When I was evangelical dropping an F bomb was something only unsaved people do. Have things changed?
Yeah that kind of startled me too. This was supposed to be a Christian podcast right? And the guy dropped the f-bomb and no one was taken aback by it? When I was a Christian saying the F word was a huge no-no.
@@Octoberfurst he's just so manly that they can't say anything about it! LOL
The girls gone Bible did tell him and did question him why he cussed so much. They got him to watch his tongue. He isn’t cussing much.
i think it's a clue that this whole thing is a parody sketch
@@mariaconiramirez6686what?? A woman told a man what to do? 😰😰 lol
im so sick of the word "provide", i feel like im about to break into hives every time i hear it
At one point he tried to say that his girlfriend felt like she couldn’t “confide” in him but he accidentally said “confined” and I find that so ironic. Such a subtle difference in the words but such a huge difference in their meaning. The belief that she can’t confide in him about her concerns and should take them to only god is what keeps her confined. A Freudian slip maybe.
It’s not a Freudian slip. He’s just fucking stupid.
If I was not allowed to have divorced my wasband, I would have run away to a different country or taken actions to not be not around anymore, if you catch my drift. It was such an abusive toxic situation and I was sooooo depressed and miserable. It was the worst experience of my life and if anyone finds themselves in that situation they should be ab,e to leave! Im thinking that if no-fault divorce is removed, way less people will get married in the first place.
BRO WILL NOT STOP YAPPING. And the women just mhming the entire time… actually painful to listen to.
Janko really said "i can fix him" about hitler
17:28 Another point on this discussion of needing male protection - what are those men protecting you from? In this modern age, it's other men.
Toxic guys will tell you you need them for protection instead of reflecting how men could change their behavior so women don't feel endangered 24/7 for just existing.
You think calling their podcast a ministry is bad? I was at a church once and they started talking about "the ministry" the heritage foundation. That's not a ministry. That's a conservative political organization.
This was well into my deconstruction, but I let my parents drag me to church. (It wasn't their local church. I met them for vacation in Colorado.) They also endorsed a candidate in their local election from the stage, and several people were openly carrying guns. It was a weird experience. I grew up in church, but that one was significantly more vocally politically Conservative than the one I was used to.
My mom constantly plays their videos and its making me wanna rip my ears off
@47:21 it's so self-contradictory. Here he says he's going to be "super vulnerable" and describe "very bad habits" he used to have. Habits are of course internalised behaviours that a person develops, and they can be positive or negative. Negative habits not only affect other people but also can be severely harmful for the person who has the habit.
But then he goes on to describe these "very bad habits" in a completely externalised way that absolves him of responsibility and puts it onto others (later clarified as his previous girlfriends and other women) instead.
It's a very strange way for him to say that he has developed a habit of poor self-reflection and communication about his feelings which results him unhealthily bottling those feelings up and then exploding, thereby hurting people he cares about and ultimately causing HIMSELF harm and suffering.
Maybe if he actually did make himself vulnerable, he might realise this. His habit is about himself, not about how much He supposedly took all of the "sh*t" from women such as his previous girlfriends.
Weirdly it's like a kind of when someone says something like, "my greatest weakness is needing to be so strong all the time". He's basically saying "My worst habit is how the things you do make me angry". It's almost a bit of abuser talk: "Look what you made me do!"
I think their statement about feeling more feminine when they dont have to worry about planning or taking care of things, and that a masculine man does that everything for them is actually super interesting because the opposite typically happens (especially in more conservative homes). If something is being planned, it's typically the woman doing it. Are you going on vacation/moving? The woman is typically going to be the one planning the logistics and doing the packing. Are you getting together with friends/family? The woman is usually the one to put it on the calendar and organize with the other parties involved. Unless I'm missing something, it sounds like she expects a masculine man to be doing all these things instead of her. In which case, it would actually be a reversal of what typically happens. So I would like her to be more specific in exactly what she expects a man to take care of so she can "turn off her brain" because what she seems to be describing is the opposite of the conservative norm.
Does that g.f get any say in anything? He talks like she isnt there. I didnt realize sge was there, until Taylor pointed it out. That George guy is so gross😖
I can't say that I've ever had a time when I was standing in like a store or something and thinking "oh, I'm so scared, I wish I had a man with me >_
As someone who's never been in actual danger either, and who's from a statistically Safe country and even neighbourhood (i grew Up in the Most boring small town imaginable, in a middle-aged, middle class neighbourhood)...
... Gaslighting. The answer is gaslighting. My dad wouldnt Let me Go Out by myself after dark, because i might be "attacked". I Had to call him to Pick me Up, even at 7pm on a tuesday If it was dark outside. I was expected to get a cab If He couldnt. When i went anywhere near the train Station, i was warned because that area is "dodgy". That area isnt dodgy, it's Just full of immigrants, so... Thats a whole other Level of yikes. When i went to Uni and told Stories of Parties, her assumed that i Always took a cab everywhere (as If id have Money for that), because a girl on her own would be attacked in the dark. To this day, i get paranoid when i Walk Home after dark, because its been drilled into my Skull that there MUST be a stranger in an alley Just waiting to jump me.
If i Look at statistics, thats completely Out of Proportion. Where im from, women typically get attacked by someone they know. But instead, the Focus is Put on Stranger danger and it really messes you Up and makes you Look See every man you Encounter as a Potential threat. It's exhausting
I’ve been binge watching both your channel and your husband’s . Both of you are such good communicators on top of being knowledgeable and quite thoughtful how you present facts, opinions, experience and so forth. Thank you both so much for the fantastic work!
I would never be able to watch this sort of video without the filter of review like you. Their mindset is so hard to deal with. I appreciate your spoons (or spell slots, however you view them!).
George: "Submit to men...blah blah blah... obey men...blah blah blah...let men dictate...blah blah blah...or you are most likely gonna die alone (aka without a big strong Alpha-man)..."
Me-- happily single, asexual, and gay: "Do you promise?! WAHOOOOO! Okeydokey then, I'm off to read my next favorite book and feed my cats!" 💙😽
Exactly, lol.
Her talking about being table to turn her brain off and not think about what’s going on is probably the most accurate thing I’ve ever heard her say
love to se what I consider to be an example of a loving caring couple (from what we see ofc, but I'd bet on it) dissect the stupidity of a toxic couple is great ❤ I always love your content and also seeing you two interact it just so cute to me lmao
"This [message that women shouldn't complain and should just pray and let the man be accountable to God] is just magic to get away with what the men want, which is no accountability." Well said, Drew
The whole "Man provides everything in every conceivable way" thing raises definite red flags. I've known women in abusive relationships where the man had control of the finances, bank accounts, ownership of the car, etc. and used it as a way of ensuring that she would find it really hard to leave, as to do so would mean essentially leaving with nothing. And in all honesty, this kind of culture/philosophy is going to attract abusive personalities because it is tailor-made for them.
I feel very sad for these women. Robots. They want to be robots. And I feel bad for the men in their lives, how much pressure is on them to do EVERYTHING so the women can close their eyes and do just follow commands. Guessing they are raising their children to follow these rule sets for men and women. So sad.
*Well...I get the feeling of wanting to turn your brain off;* I'm usually under so much stress and have so many responsibilities that I used to daydream about a man whisking me away like a Damsel in Distress and taking care of all the major responsibilities that may come our way.
It cost me some of my life savings, but I just went to an all-inclusive resort in Mexico for 4 days and I *FINALLY* got to turn my brain off (well, for half of the time because I was a bridesmaid in a wedding). 🤗
Yep - some days the freedom to not 'adult' - to be free of the stresses of life - is attractive whatever your day to day usual role is. As a single childless person I have a bunch less of those stresses; but then can't divide costs in any way. Every combination of adult life has issues, the trick in relationships is how can we together lessen that; or together take on eg parenthood in a way that affirms everyone's contributions, whether the responsibilities are defined in 21st century flexibility or a 1950s middle class tradition (the poorer folk have always needed two incomes, and in some contexts getting home and handing over your full paypacket from the mine etc to Mam to wife was very much the power balance)
My parents were very traditional without it being a big issue, just what was normal culturally for them. Dad as provider; Mum as carer of children and making the budget work, that was challenged in the years in 80s that Dad was made redundant and struggled to find a new job (although he studied for exams during that time to improve the odds). Then the budget was squeezed and it was absolutely Mum whose choices in the grocery store, or school uniform shop, got us through.
They are still traditional in their 80s. If Mum dies first Dad would need how to cook support; if Dad goes first Mum claims she has no idea about how to manage the various financial stuff - though I think I quick lesson on online banking and billing would set her up .
At around the 21, 22 minute mark, one of the women is talking about how she has to be on and in control all the time when she is by herself, and what she wants is to be able to turn that off when she is with her partner. Girlfriend, this is why I am a sub. It's not feminine or masculine, it's kink. 🤷♀️😅
It sounds like her desire to have a reprieve from the hyper vigilance that women are forced to adopt as a result of men’s persistent harassment of women in public. Men tend to refrain from harassing a woman who is accompanied by a man.
Anytime someone says "I'm the boss, I'm in charge, I'm the man" I can't help but laugh and say "yeah, ok buddy." Even if that man turned around and beat me afterward. And he did. And I still laughed.
Let me first say: I’m sorry that happened to you. No one should have ever put their hands on you.
And: it’s always giving „women are all gold diggers“ energy when they don’t even have a couch energy 😂
@@lilianmorgenstern2123 right!? How are we supposed to hear that and not snort laugh?
@@Biiku_ yes it always feels like a 3 year old throwing a tantrum that no they’re on charge of when they go to sleep😂
Drew is in a mood, this video, and I'm here for it!