This was the best video you've ever shot, Ash. Only a true gentleman would have the courage to share such an overcoming story with his audience. I love your channel. Greetings from Brazil!
This is absolute truth. Anyone that says different is deluding themselves. I give up bourbon 3 years ago. Lost 38lbs, and am in the best level of health in my life - and I just turned 61. The comment about poor judgement is spot on. Once I'd had a couple glasses of wine, I lost my self discipline and would eat food in a quality and quantity I never would otherwise. Thank you for this honest and accurate accounting Ash. Cheers.
I had a very similar experience as you Ash. I gave up drinking when I married my wife and we were expecting our first child. I didn’t want him to go through what I went through when my dad came home drunk. It cost me a lot of friends leaving that environment. But my life gradually improved for the better. I now prefer a cup of tea to be honest.
I absolutely love the fact that most of the channels I watch about men's wear also occasionally touch on mature living, manners, etiquette, etc. Also, opening up about issues we have lived through is difficult but also a sign of maturity. Thanks for this video.
Thanks for speaking up about this so openly, Ash. I've lost a close family member to alcohol and nearly lost others and I've often reflected on the need to reassess our relationship with alcohol in our culture. Talking openly like this is an important step
Wow, there’s so much to relate to here. At 30 I gained weight and decided to make a change. I actually stopped drinking alcohol. I realised that a some point I lived more for getting out on bars than my everyday live. It’s many years ago now (I’m 53), and I haven’t regretted it. Thank you Ash, for sharing this 🙏🏻
I quit heavy drinking 23 years ago. It’s what I gave my wife for Mother’s Day. Turns out it was a gift to me too. I’m a three tour Vietnam combat veteran. In the first 30 days my thought clarity cleared up to an amazing level. I have never regretted it. I’m 76 and health wise, mental and physical, in excellent shape.
Ash, that was a wonderful, honest video. I am in my 35th year in law enforcement having joined in 1988 and I can relate to all of what you spoke of. The drinking culture was rampant and my watershed moment was the loss of a close friend and colleague in a fatal road traffic collision after he had been drinking at the police mess. Moderation is key. Take care of yourself!
Beautiful story. Takes immense strength to ask hard questions and receive unpleasant answers. Going the extra mile and acting is the hardest choice to make. I personally tend to focus on the enjoyment of making alcoholic drinks and the history behind them. I’m well aware of the pitfalls of drinking without moderation due to family stories. Moderation is always key folks!
Dear Ash, What an excellent talk! Thank you! Like you, I am a Military Air Force Veteran and a retired American Policeman of 30 years. I'd say that 90% or more of our police calls involved the abuse of alcohol by someone. I found myself throughout the years with ups and downs with the consumption of alcohol. I decided a while back to greatly limit my consumption of alcohol to an occasional glass of wine or beer when having a meal at a restaurant. I decided to basically limit it to one and no more than two drinks. I stopped drinking at home as our 19 year old son has an addiction problem to alcohol and marijuana which made him suicidal and landed him in several mental health facilities. Thankfully, he is recovering and hasn't drank or used drugs in over 6 months. Out of love for him, I no longer drink at home or in his presence whatsoever. I greatly appreciate your show and I think it is the best of this type available for viewing. You are doing a great job! I now dress better, feel better and have a new purpose in my own life that centers around my faith in God. Thank you as someone who shares a common work experience with you. God richly bless you!
Thank you sir - when considered over the annals of time, it would be easy to declare that alcohol has been the most destructive drugs that humanity has been exposed to - if it was invented today the government would ban it!
Thank you for sharing this with us, Ash. It takes courage to own up to your own failings in such an open and honest way. But the real message here is that if you, our clean cut host and guide to chap nirvana, can turn your life around so magnificently after years of unhealthy excessive alcohol consumption, it sets the perfect example for the rest of us to follow. Well done!
Thoroughly enjoyed this video so much. Been sober for 1 year as of today at 33 years old and have a similar family history, and similar story to you. Thinking about and taking inventory with it, and looking into drinking in moderation again after a long period of overdoing it. This video is spot on.
Absolutely attest to this. I’ve experienced this addiction in mental health as a practitioner, and also personally in my family. An incidious destroyer on many fronts.. if not managed very, very, very ..carefully
Good topic! I'm like you in my 50s and moderated drinking a long time ago; I have followed a 'one and done' rule, per day and so while not having a drink each day, I have stopped at 1 on any day that I have had a drink. Lately, the Canadian government (I am in Canada) has just issued guidelines about alcohol that say ANY amount has an adverse health impact in terms of potential for cancer. The new guidelines say 1-2 drinks per week is a low risk, 3-6 drinks per week is a moderate risk, and more than 6 per week higher risk. That is a change from the guideline in place until now, which said have a max of 2 per day or 14 per week. I'm going to try to stick to a max of 2 per week, and follow that new guideline to help reduce a risk of cancer. Hope this is short update on the Canadian guideline is helpful to others as well.
Excellent video. I am 51 and currently trying to change my relationship with alcohol after 30 years of unhealthy drinking - your video is very informative and inspiring. Only one drink in the last 40 days, however its the long road ahead with minimal alcohol that feels difficult to comprehend. But you've showed it's possible to turn things around and control binge drinking. Thanks for posting, I am sure you have helped lots of people with this video.
When asked if I drink too much I always respond by 'Wine-o !' of course.. Cheers and you are quite right to be careful and know yourself with respect to alcohol and everything else for that matter.
Like the channel but this is perhaps your most important video. The UK's relationship with booze is very very deeply culturally ingrained...as much as any country in the world. As you get older though alcohol does indeed start to take more than it gives.
Have to say this reflects my life of late. The last 6 months following a breakup I’ve been drinking every night….new year new me though and I’ve confined alcohol to the weekend. Feel a lot better for it and more productive too.
When my brother and I were young, about 9 years old, our dad let us have beer because we kept nagging him. Some would say that it was a bad thing to do but I have despised all alcohol ever since. So I never had to battle with alcohol. My dad's method seem to work for my siblings as well because none of us drink much. Thanks for sharing this part of your life.
Your life sounds just like mine , I’m 58 and still drink a lot , alcohol just seems the normal in my life and people around me ever since I was 16 . Marriage broke up because of Alcohol , not from my side but my wife who turned into a alcoholic and was abusive with it . I now have a new partner who is 1 in a million . I answered 8 yes in that AA questions . Now is the time to get on top of it before it’s to late . Your best video you have made 👍Thanks
Booze is no real friend to any of us, it takes and never gives in the relationship. If my video has helped you in any way I am profoundly happy that I could have played a tiny part in your own journey. Let me know if I can help - but I suspect that you know what to do - there is huge help out there and AA is a great place to start.
Very good video. Today, majority of people drink because of social gatherings or mental health issues. Good advice and enjoying the Chaps Guide journey. Thank you 👍
Very relatable. I was a heavy drinker from around 16 years of age until my mid 30ies. I quit for 2 years because I wanted to lose weight, and then I found out that I didnt enjoy it as much anymore, and also that I would not only get much worse hangovers even from a single glass of wine, so I ended up quitting alcohol for good.
I can completely relate to this video Ash. I'm roughly the same age as you and in the the late 1980s as a young man going down the pub & getting hammered was seen as a cool thing to do. Hellraisers like Oliver Reed were heroes to us. At my most excessive I was knocking back 40+ pints a week, going out drinking 4-5 nights a week. I slowed down over the years and more or less completely gave up about 15 years ago. The last time I had a drink was 4 small bottles of beer on New Year's Eve, before that it was probably a couple of social pints after work in the summer. I really do not miss it - particularly the dreadful hangovers that seemed to get more debilitating as the years went by. I think your sons generation realise how stupid & reckless alcohol makes you and thankfully it appears that they take much better care of themselves than we ever did.
This was a really good one Ash!!! Growing up in a mixed European household myself (Welch mom/German dad), I started boozing at 14 and it never seemed out of the ordinary. It wasn’t till my mid thirties that I started to think about my relationship with booze and see it for what it really was. It’s extremely difficult to look at ourselves and our problems. I salute you sir l!
Al - Khul, is a demon to walk away from imho, I worked in defense, and indeed 98% drank, and always 2% didn't. Then I drank myself, and often a lot. I always looked a little jealous at those 2%. Always the fittest marines, and the coolest guys. So happy that .. at the age of 44 the penny finally dropped and now 5 months sober, and no intention of ever going back to drinking alcohol
Great admission Ash. I commend your candour. I suspect a lot of us men have a problem with alcohol. More than we’d like to admit. I am not a heavy drinker although like you, I do feel apart from the brief hit of dopamine alcohol only takes away from you. I have recently started alcohol free drinks to fool my senses and adapt my behaviour to less alcohol intake. Long may or continue! All the best Ash. Loving the new content.
Ash, I have learned much from The Chap’s Guide. Perhaps the most important thing I’ve learned is the journey to Chap Nirvana is more than outward appearance. I look forward to the other videos in this series.
Thanks Ash. Obviously the booze was taking its toll on you, to the point you were on the defense. But you sure found a way out and landed on a good place, fitting a good chap.
Wonderful article and sound advice. I used to have a couple of tactics to control the demon. The first was my 'Friday evening to Sunday lunchtime' policy with no driking outside of this period (excepting the very occasional celebration). The second was to buy very good wine and whisky, which works by limiting the amount I buy and (because I'm as tight as a duck's a**e) works the guilt centre in my brain so that I only have one or two glasses. However, I just took the AA self assessment (2/10) and the leftover half bottle of wine has gone into what I expect to be a nice beef stew. That's three tactics! Many thanks, Ash. 😃
Thank you for your honesty, Ash. I can relate to much of what you’ve said. I have been “on the wagon” for over 6 years now and my life has improved immensely as a result. Hearing the struggles and solutions of another is an important part of recovering from one’s own struggles. I think this video will be just that for many who view it.
Thanks for sharing this Ash. Your story sounds so familiar to me. I got into wine in my 30's. Loved the whole experience but drank more than I should have, and certainly more than was good for me. It became a counter balance to work pressures and my preferred form of relaxation. One day I caught myself in the mirror. I didn't like what saw. It was a wake up call for me. I changed my habits and started hitting the trails and going to the gym. The weight fell away pretty quickly without all the dead calories from my booze intake. I became fitter and my coping mechanisms improved. Today, 20+ years on I enjoy alcohol in moderation, but I'm not living for the next chance to have a drink. I'm in control, look better and feel that I'm in good shape for my age. It was a sliding doors moment for me, and I hate to think what life would look like now if I hadn't made the necessary changes. I'm not alone, and encourage others where I can to put down the glass and get some exercise. Cheers! Phil
Very good explanation about alcohol addiction Ash. It's never seen as a problem by the person at the centre. After a particularly hard tour of Bosnia in the early 90s I myself took to drink. This continued in Germany until I met my Girlfriend. And only then did I suddenly see what I was doing. I've also learned to take it or leave it. But I'm also conscious that the binge monster is always present waiting for an opportunity. A battle I'm happy to say I continue to win. Hats off to you on such a great video.
Congratulations on winning your battle with that demon. I hope to help others, who may be less accomplished at their own fight in my new job with a major UK veterans charity.
Thanks very much for your honesty. Drinking is something always in the back of my mind too. My career has mirrored yours more or less here in America (first in the US navy, then in the local police). Unfortunately the drinking culture is alive and well both in the United States Navy and our local police forces too. It took me a few decades to decide this was just not the life for me. I now use running, cycling and exercise in general as an 'excuse' to avoid the booze. I think this is by far one of your most insightful videos and I want to thank you for being so candid.
Excellent video Ash! All it took for me was my first hangover and I stopped immediately. I consider myself as one of the lucky ones in that I was able to stop before the substance took over.
Great video. I think it is courageous of you to share past mistakes and admit that you had a problem, but I think it’s equally courageous to suggest to others that they take a hard look at their drinking. That’s not going to be a popular stance. But I think you’re absolutely right. Alcohol doesn’t make life better, and in many ways makes it worse. There will be many who are immediately defensive about it when you bring it up, but if they would just try the same experiment you did I think they would be blown away.
Non alcoholic beer fine in moderation? I try to do like one week yes one week no type of deal but it varies. I wanted to add a treat into my diet so hopefully it's okay as long as I don't drink it everyday. Thanks for your helpful insight as always whether it's about clothes or lifestyle in general you always come through good sir. By the way on my next trip to the thrift store a Linen Sport coat is definitely on the list:) I do have a Plaid Suit Jacket that I can also use as a Sport coat hopefully it wouldn't look bad with Chinos or Jeans since like I said it being a Suit Jacket which I got as a separate.
Like everyone else who has commented...I completely recognise this. The sleep issue, that was the oně that got to me. Also the judgement when far too drunk, you can do thinks that are competely out of character. Moderation is the key...I still enjoy having a drink every now and then...but I conciously avoid drinking to the extent of my judgement being darkened or being ill.....good advice
Ash Good advice to younger chaps. I am also able to attest this. I gave up alcohol over 5 years ago for health reasons. This is another reason to control you alcohol intake. It can couse liver problems along with many other health problems. With hindsight I would have not drank so much in my youth. Hopefully younger chaps will take advice from older more experienced chaps and learn from our mistakes. I too lost about 30 lbs after I stoped drinking. I miss the occasional pint or dram but it is worth not if it will prolong my life. Everything in moderation. Cheers Ron
Kudos to you for this video, Ash Not really about style - or even strictly about Chaps! - but a great relating of life experiences and how we can learn from them. I see so much of myself in what you've said - and expect many others will too. Hope many, many more people get to view this. Looking forward to the next in the series!
This video was like a playback of my own life almost word for word Ash. Whilst not a vodka on my breakfast cornflakes situation, too much of my life revolved around alcohol. I just don't bother with booze now, rarely touch the stuff. In my early 40's I am in the best shape of my life. From a 46 blazer and shortly needing to reach for a 48. Down to a 38 to 40. I have a thing called 'Sunday' back and just so much more energy overall. It's something I am delighted to live without👍
For me, it was like a mini rebirth and it sounds like the same came your way too - I feel so foolish when looking back, the words "what was I thinking?" often come into my head when I think of the hangovers, beer-gut and wasted money. But life is a journey and we have learned from that diversion. On to better things now!!!
@@TheChapsGuide Yes it is a rebirth for sure. Like being trapped in a fog. It is only afterwards you think wow, why did I do that all those years. Onwards and upwards now🙏👍
Great testimony of your journey with alcohol and how you recognized the potential problems with it. I never been one to have a problem with it, but I have lost several friends to it in my teens due to drunk driving. I never get behind the wheel of a vehicle, I've seen first hand the damage it can bring to friends and family. A good dram whisky will last me several hours of enjoyment and never have a second one to be honest. Have a great day Ash
Hey, this is amazing Ash and very vulnerable of you. From NZ and my background is very similar. Blue collar community growing up where the pub was king. 39 now and mostly a good relationship with the booze, a few beers during the week, and a cheeky negroni in the weekend, but it's taken me a while to get it within a healthy level. Feel so much better for understanding my limits and the value I get out of it. By the way, lovely peacoat, is it a Gloverall or something just as dapper?
Thank you Ash, I really enjoyed this very honest, frank, analytical (and also educational) video conversation. Fortunately, I have never really had too many problems associated with the demon drink (2/12 in the very useful AA online test). I am sure that in years gone by I was probably on/off touching a 3-4-5 but having witnessed in others the very negative affects that a 'drinking culture' imparts to peoples lives, managed to stay well clear of that loop. A few nice wines and the odd Bombay GnT are basically my thing. I also notice (in Australia), with its drinking culture, most people spend far more on their drinks than on their food when eating out at a restaurant - and that is not by virtue of choosing the most expensive of wines on the list.... I look forwards to your next video, an interesting change in perspective.... All the best.
Great vid; thanks. A good thing you got control before damaging your job or marriage. Me? All through grad school I worked in the bohemian saloons, tending bar and playing music. Wonderful times, but also horribly dangerous, in ways I’m now aware of. After the academic job market suddenly fell apart I was forced to take a job driving taxis - but I sobered up quick, and stayed that way until now. Will I go back? My heart and lungs are in great shape, so I’ll no doubt contract some exotic form of cancer eventually. When it happens I’ll stock up on my favorites - Heineken, Jameson, Glenfiddich - put on my headphones, play air guitar with Jimi, have a party, and go out in style.
So many comments attest to the prevalence of this issue in the male population Ash. I have just woken up on a Sunday morning without a hangover for the first time in a long time. Men should be more open about this issue and thank you for being the catalyst that may push the concern forward Ash.
I have just read the recent autobiography of Matthew Perry (recently deceased). It charts his addiction journey - well worth reading if you want to explore the depths of addiction further.
Thank you Ash for having the courage to talk about it so openly. That takes courage, and I salute you for that. I need one hand to count the glasses of beer or wine I drink in a year. In my young adulthood life, I was the weird guy who would not drink much, like you have described it. People laughed at me. Especially during my service in the Swiss Army. Today, I hear from people that I am a responsible person because of my non-drinking habit. I wish that would have been acknowledged the same way 25 years ago.
Thanks for your open and brave account of your experience with alcohol. I too grew up in a town where I was able to celebrate my 16th birthday in a bar. Not a good thing even if I undoubtedly thought so at the time. Looking forward to more in this series on habits.
I often go to bars just to have sodas (and tip 75% or so). One of the most annoying kinds of people is the "let me buy you a drink" guy. I once had a very twitchy guy insist on buying me a drink, which I sheepishly accepted as a one-drink thing. He insisted I sit down (I was pacing because I have ADHD) and then brought his female something over and sat down without even asking. She proceeded to ask me my horoscope, which snapped my social patience, and I just went on a diatribe about how horoscopes are abject pseudoscience and that the premise doesn't even make basic sense. It wasn't my proudest moment, but the lesson of the day is to not force yourself on people by insisting on buying them drinks and inserting yourself into their evening. Some people just want to sit on their phone and have a Roy Rogers.
i stopped drinking in the pubs really in my early 30s (52 now) but then drank a bit in the house- mainly wine, but it's strictly a fri and saturday night now...friday after work i do some exercise then relax to some tunes... saturday is normally is based around food - whether it be a pub or restaurant, or during lockdown a takeway etc... :) it's just finding that balance...
Billy Connally, speaking of Scotland specifically, but actually including most Celtic cultures, said in contrast to most over cultures where alcohol is an adjacent aspect, for the Celts alcohol is the central focus, especially among men, and combined with a personal dysfunctional backgrounds, leads to very dysfunctional current lives.
Me: gets home from work, cracks a beer. Oh look Chaps Guide New video Cooking diner watching Ash Finishing beer about to pour a G&T 😳 But hey I live in Australia and I have just been able to get my hands on a bottle of silent pool haha Thank you for the video quite right! I've barely touched a drop in 2022 but after a heavy few weeks it was turning around and Ash to the rescue!
I started to drink and eat too much during the first lock down. I was knocking back the rum and cokes every night with my evening meal, I think it was because apathy, worry and boredom had set in. I have always been active and enjoy lots of walking and days out in the countryside and because I was unable to do this I took solace from food and drink which caused me to put on more than a stone in weight. I have gradually reduced my drink and trying to eat healthier, it's difficult but I know I will get there. This video has helped to boost my motivation a little bit more. Thank you.
Well said, and thank you for saying it! I am of Native American heritage and I must be very careful with my relationship with alcohol. I appreciate you sharing your history with us.
Other than the fact that my family comes from a long line of factory workers, watching this video was like listening to my own autobiography! As a Marine, alcohol was a large part of the culture and traditions of the Corps. As a young copper, the stress of the job and the things you witnessed take there toll and it was just expected that a drink or two after your shift was the way to cope. 24 years ago, I woke up to the fact that alcohol was not the proper go-to solution. 24 years sober, never once looked back. I cannot express how much I enjoy your videos, and your advice.
Wonderful video. I'm new to the channel, but this is the sort of thing that a lot of gentlemen's channels don't mention (much). Thank you for your openness. It makes me want to see the rest of this kind of content. I can definitely relate to much of what you said, though on a much lighter scale.
What a heartfelt episode Ash, it certainly fleshed out the man behind the Chap! I spent many years in research as a young man where nights in the pub were part of the culture and Saturdays were merely recovery days. When I turned 40 I opted to start running and have now run a number of races up to half marathon. I abandoned alcohol entirely a few years back as a result of a migraine diagnosis and don’t it’s it at all. In fact there a many great alternatives out there if you look. I am now fitter and more accomplished than I have ever been and it allows everyday to be a pleasure as I watch my teenage daughter grow up and learn team up with my wife to run our businesses together. Hats off to you once again sir! Mark
This was the best video you've ever shot, Ash. Only a true gentleman would have the courage to share such an overcoming story with his audience. I love your channel. Greetings from Brazil!
This is absolute truth. Anyone that says different is deluding themselves. I give up bourbon 3 years ago. Lost 38lbs, and am in the best level of health in my life - and I just turned 61.
The comment about poor judgement is spot on. Once I'd had a couple glasses of wine, I lost my self discipline and would eat food in a quality and quantity I never would otherwise. Thank you for this honest and accurate accounting Ash. Cheers.
I had a very similar experience as you Ash. I gave up drinking when I married my wife and we were expecting our first child. I didn’t want him to go through what I went through when my dad came home drunk.
It cost me a lot of friends leaving that environment. But my life gradually improved for the better. I now prefer a cup of tea to be honest.
I absolutely love the fact that most of the channels I watch about men's wear also occasionally touch on mature living, manners, etiquette, etc.
Also, opening up about issues we have lived through is difficult but also a sign of maturity. Thanks for this video.
I totally get this I was also a 80s youth and the way we mistreated alcohol was staggering. Well done for this Ash 👍
Thanks for speaking up about this so openly, Ash. I've lost a close family member to alcohol and nearly lost others and I've often reflected on the need to reassess our relationship with alcohol in our culture. Talking openly like this is an important step
Wow, there’s so much to relate to here. At 30 I gained weight and decided to make a change. I actually stopped drinking alcohol. I realised that a some point I lived more for getting out on bars than my everyday live. It’s many years ago now (I’m 53), and I haven’t regretted it.
Thank you Ash, for sharing this 🙏🏻
I quit heavy drinking 23 years ago. It’s what I gave my wife for Mother’s Day. Turns out it was a gift to me too. I’m a three tour Vietnam combat veteran. In the first 30 days my thought clarity cleared up to an amazing level. I have never regretted it. I’m 76 and health wise, mental and physical, in excellent shape.
Congratulations sir.
Ash, that was a wonderful, honest video. I am in my 35th year in law enforcement having joined in 1988 and I can relate to all of what you spoke of. The drinking culture was rampant and my watershed moment was the loss of a close friend and colleague in a fatal road traffic collision after he had been drinking at the police mess. Moderation is key. Take care of yourself!
Retired cop here, if you’ve been in the job for 35 years no wonder you drink!
Beautiful story. Takes immense strength to ask hard questions and receive unpleasant answers. Going the extra mile and acting is the hardest choice to make. I personally tend to focus on the enjoyment of making alcoholic drinks and the history behind them. I’m well aware of the pitfalls of drinking without moderation due to family stories. Moderation is always key folks!
Dear Ash, What an excellent talk! Thank you! Like you, I am a Military Air Force Veteran and a retired American Policeman of 30 years. I'd say that 90% or more of our police calls involved the abuse of alcohol by someone. I found myself throughout the years with ups and downs with the consumption of alcohol. I decided a while back to greatly limit my consumption of alcohol to an occasional glass of wine or beer when having a meal at a restaurant. I decided to basically limit it to one and no more than two drinks. I stopped drinking at home as our 19 year old son has an addiction problem to alcohol and marijuana which made him suicidal and landed him in several mental health facilities. Thankfully, he is recovering and hasn't drank or used drugs in over 6 months. Out of love for him, I no longer drink at home or in his presence whatsoever. I greatly appreciate your show and I think it is the best of this type available for viewing. You are doing a great job! I now dress better, feel better and have a new purpose in my own life that centers around my faith in God. Thank you as someone who shares a common work experience with you. God richly bless you!
Thank you sir - when considered over the annals of time, it would be easy to declare that alcohol has been the most destructive drugs that humanity has been exposed to - if it was invented today the government would ban it!
Thank you for sharing this with us, Ash. It takes courage to own up to your own failings in such an open and honest way. But the real message here is that if you, our clean cut host and guide to chap nirvana, can turn your life around so magnificently after years of unhealthy excessive alcohol consumption, it sets the perfect example for the rest of us to follow. Well done!
Thoroughly enjoyed this video so much. Been sober for 1 year as of today at 33 years old and have a similar family history, and similar story to you. Thinking about and taking inventory with it, and looking into drinking in moderation again after a long period of overdoing it. This video is spot on.
Absolutely attest to this. I’ve experienced this addiction in mental health as a practitioner, and also personally in my family. An incidious destroyer on many fronts.. if not managed very, very, very ..carefully
All the more respect to you sir for overcoming these issues.
The time you lose through hangovers is quite scary when you tot it up. It's a very good point you raise.
Good topic! I'm like you in my 50s and moderated drinking a long time ago; I have followed a 'one and done' rule, per day and so while not having a drink each day, I have stopped at 1 on any day that I have had a drink. Lately, the Canadian government (I am in Canada) has just issued guidelines about alcohol that say ANY amount has an adverse health impact in terms of potential for cancer. The new guidelines say 1-2 drinks per week is a low risk, 3-6 drinks per week is a moderate risk, and more than 6 per week higher risk. That is a change from the guideline in place until now, which said have a max of 2 per day or 14 per week. I'm going to try to stick to a max of 2 per week, and follow that new guideline to help reduce a risk of cancer. Hope this is short update on the Canadian guideline is helpful to others as well.
Yet now you can smell Marijuana on every corner everywhere you go. Yay Canada.
Excellent video. I am 51 and currently trying to change my relationship with alcohol after 30 years of unhealthy drinking - your video is very informative and inspiring. Only one drink in the last 40 days, however its the long road ahead with minimal alcohol that feels difficult to comprehend. But you've showed it's possible to turn things around and control binge drinking.
Thanks for posting, I am sure you have helped lots of people with this video.
Stay strong. You will overcome sir!
Ash you're a gentleman's superhero, you've inspired me
Powerfull !
As a former Sailor I will reaming silent on this topic 😅
When asked if I drink too much I always respond by 'Wine-o !' of course.. Cheers and you are quite right to be careful and know yourself with respect to alcohol and everything else for that matter.
Three good decisions...... Obviously get booze under control......... Military pension.........police pension.......... Savvy.
Like the channel but this is perhaps your most important video. The UK's relationship with booze is very very deeply culturally ingrained...as much as any country in the world. As you get older though alcohol does indeed start to take more than it gives.
Fantastic and thought provoking in an area that is very close to home.
Thanks Ash.
I'm 3 years completely sober. Which is how I ended up working towards chap Nirvana.
Thanks for your video, I enjoy the content immensely.
Congratulations sir, a mighty achievement. Do doubt you are reaping the benefits of that choice every day.
Have to say this reflects my life of late. The last 6 months following a breakup I’ve been drinking every night….new year new me though and I’ve confined alcohol to the weekend. Feel a lot better for it and more productive too.
Good luck to you sir - a new horizon beckons - just reach for it!
When my brother and I were young, about 9 years old, our dad let us have beer because we kept nagging him. Some would say that it was a bad thing to do but I have despised all alcohol ever since. So I never had to battle with alcohol. My dad's method seem to work for my siblings as well because none of us drink much. Thanks for sharing this part of your life.
Your life sounds just like mine , I’m 58 and still drink a lot , alcohol just seems the normal in my life and people around me ever since I was 16 . Marriage broke up because of Alcohol , not from my side but my wife who turned into a alcoholic and was abusive with it .
I now have a new partner who is 1 in a million . I answered 8 yes in that AA questions . Now is the time to get on top of it before it’s to late .
Your best video you have made 👍Thanks
Booze is no real friend to any of us, it takes and never gives in the relationship. If my video has helped you in any way I am profoundly happy that I could have played a tiny part in your own journey. Let me know if I can help - but I suspect that you know what to do - there is huge help out there and AA is a great place to start.
Very good video. Today, majority of people drink because of social gatherings or mental health issues. Good advice and enjoying the Chaps Guide journey. Thank you 👍
Very relatable. I was a heavy drinker from around 16 years of age until my mid 30ies. I quit for 2 years because I wanted to lose weight, and then I found out that I didnt enjoy it as much anymore, and also that I would not only get much worse hangovers even from a single glass of wine, so I ended up quitting alcohol for good.
I can completely relate to this video Ash. I'm roughly the same age as you and in the the late 1980s as a young man going down the pub & getting hammered was seen as a cool thing to do. Hellraisers like Oliver Reed were heroes to us. At my most excessive I was knocking back 40+ pints a week, going out drinking 4-5 nights a week. I slowed down over the years and more or less completely gave up about 15 years ago. The last time I had a drink was 4 small bottles of beer on New Year's Eve, before that it was probably a couple of social pints after work in the summer. I really do not miss it - particularly the dreadful hangovers that seemed to get more debilitating as the years went by. I think your sons generation realise how stupid & reckless alcohol makes you and thankfully it appears that they take much better care of themselves than we ever did.
Inspiring gentleman
It takes a brave man to bare his soul to the world. Salute to you Ash.
This was a really good one Ash!!! Growing up in a mixed European household myself (Welch mom/German dad), I started boozing at 14 and it never seemed out of the ordinary. It wasn’t till my mid thirties that I started to think about my relationship with booze and see it for what it really was. It’s extremely difficult to look at ourselves and our problems. I salute you sir l!
Al - Khul, is a demon to walk away from imho, I worked in defense, and indeed 98% drank, and always 2% didn't. Then I drank myself, and often a lot. I always looked a little jealous at those 2%. Always the fittest marines, and the coolest guys. So happy that .. at the age of 44 the penny finally dropped and now 5 months sober, and no intention of ever going back to drinking alcohol
Great admission Ash. I commend your candour. I suspect a lot of us men have a problem with alcohol. More than we’d like to admit.
I am not a heavy drinker although like you, I do feel apart from the brief hit of dopamine alcohol only takes away from you.
I have recently started alcohol free drinks to fool my senses and adapt my behaviour to less alcohol intake. Long may or continue!
All the best Ash. Loving the new content.
Genuinely thought the follow-on to 'I spent more than half of my service in the military...' was going be '...down the pub', can't stop laughing.
Ash, I have learned much from The Chap’s Guide. Perhaps the most important thing I’ve learned is the journey to Chap Nirvana is more than outward appearance. I look forward to the other videos in this series.
Excellent and very important video. Thank you for speaking about this.
Glad you enjoyed it!
Thanks Ash. Obviously the booze was taking its toll on you, to the point you were on the defense. But you sure found a way out and landed on a good place, fitting a good chap.
Wonderful article and sound advice.
I used to have a couple of tactics to control the demon. The first was my 'Friday evening to Sunday lunchtime' policy with no driking outside of this period (excepting the very occasional celebration). The second was to buy very good wine and whisky, which works by limiting the amount I buy and (because I'm as tight as a duck's a**e) works the guilt centre in my brain so that I only have one or two glasses.
However, I just took the AA self assessment (2/10) and the leftover half bottle of wine has gone into what I expect to be a nice beef stew. That's three tactics!
Many thanks, Ash.
😃
Well spoken
you are a wise and brave man, Ash. Im glad that i started to watch your channel some time ago. all the best to you !
NoFap Monk Mode for me
Videos like these are appreciated alot. Learning from real life lessons is the key to self-improvement, thanks for sharing!
Thank you for your honesty, Ash. I can relate to much of what you’ve said. I have been “on the wagon” for over 6 years now and my life has improved immensely as a result. Hearing the struggles and solutions of another is an important part of recovering from one’s own struggles. I think this video will be just that for many who view it.
Thumbs up! Great video 👍
Thank you 👍
I said yes to two questions
Thanks Ash. Took the test. 1/12 yes. Always wondered because my father had issues with alcohol.
Very inspiring Ash.
Thanks for sharing this Ash. Your story sounds so familiar to me. I got into wine in my 30's. Loved the whole experience but drank more than I should have, and certainly more than was good for me. It became a counter balance to work pressures and my preferred form of relaxation. One day I caught myself in the mirror. I didn't like what saw. It was a wake up call for me. I changed my habits and started hitting the trails and going to the gym. The weight fell away pretty quickly without all the dead calories from my booze intake. I became fitter and my coping mechanisms improved. Today, 20+ years on I enjoy alcohol in moderation, but I'm not living for the next chance to have a drink. I'm in control, look better and feel that I'm in good shape for my age. It was a sliding doors moment for me, and I hate to think what life would look like now if I hadn't made the necessary changes. I'm not alone, and encourage others where I can to put down the glass and get some exercise. Cheers! Phil
Bravo sir.
Very good explanation about alcohol addiction Ash. It's never seen as a problem by the person at the centre. After a particularly hard tour of Bosnia in the early 90s I myself took to drink. This continued in Germany until I met my Girlfriend. And only then did I suddenly see what I was doing. I've also learned to take it or leave it. But I'm also conscious that the binge monster is always present waiting for an opportunity. A battle I'm happy to say I continue to win. Hats off to you on such a great video.
Congratulations on winning your battle with that demon. I hope to help others, who may be less accomplished at their own fight in my new job with a major UK veterans charity.
Thanks very much for your honesty. Drinking is something always in the back of my mind too. My career has mirrored yours more or less here in America (first in the US navy, then in the local police). Unfortunately the drinking culture is alive and well both in the United States Navy and our local police forces too. It took me a few decades to decide this was just not the life for me. I now use running, cycling and exercise in general as an 'excuse' to avoid the booze. I think this is by far one of your most insightful videos and I want to thank you for being so candid.
Look forward to the series Ash. This is a great way to start.
Starlight
Excellent video Ash! All it took for me was my first hangover and I stopped immediately. I consider myself as one of the lucky ones in that I was able to stop before the substance took over.
Great, inspiring and brave video Ash. Thanks for the honesty and great story / outcome.
My pleasure!
👏👏👏👏👏No words needed.
Thank you for this, sir.
Thank you, sir, what an inspiring talk.
Great video. I think it is courageous of you to share past mistakes and admit that you had a problem, but I think it’s equally courageous to suggest to others that they take a hard look at their drinking. That’s not going to be a popular stance. But I think you’re absolutely right. Alcohol doesn’t make life better, and in many ways makes it worse. There will be many who are immediately defensive about it when you bring it up, but if they would just try the same experiment you did I think they would be blown away.
Non alcoholic beer fine in moderation? I try to do like one week yes one week no type of deal but it varies. I wanted to add a treat into my diet so hopefully it's okay as long as I don't drink it everyday. Thanks for your helpful insight as always whether it's about clothes or lifestyle in general you always come through good sir. By the way on my next trip to the thrift store a Linen Sport coat is definitely on the list:) I do have a Plaid Suit Jacket that I can also use as a Sport coat hopefully it wouldn't look bad with Chinos or Jeans since like I said it being a Suit Jacket which I got as a separate.
Great advice!
Glad it was helpful!
Like everyone else who has commented...I completely recognise this. The sleep issue, that was the oně that got to me. Also the judgement when far too drunk, you can do thinks that are competely out of character. Moderation is the key...I still enjoy having a drink every now and then...but I conciously avoid drinking to the extent of my judgement being darkened or being ill.....good advice
Great start to what will no doubt be a great series.
This is exactly the advice I’ve been looking for
Thanks Ash
Happy to help!
Brave video, Ash. Great message. Thank you, sir.
Thank You Ash!!!!
Ash Good advice to younger chaps. I am also able to attest this. I gave up alcohol over 5 years ago for health reasons. This is another reason to control you alcohol intake. It can couse liver problems along with many other health problems. With hindsight I would have not drank so much in my youth. Hopefully younger chaps will take advice from older more experienced chaps and learn from our mistakes. I too lost about 30 lbs after I stoped drinking. I miss the occasional pint or dram but it is worth not if it will prolong my life. Everything in moderation. Cheers Ron
Really good video, thank you.
Glad you liked it!
I am female, but it was really nice to hear your life advice! Thank you from Tokyo🥰💝
You're so welcome!
Great stuff as always. Thank you!
You're a long way from home
Welcome to the Pleasuredome
Kudos to you for this video, Ash
Not really about style - or even strictly about Chaps! - but a great relating of life experiences and how we can learn from them.
I see so much of myself in what you've said - and expect many others will too.
Hope many, many more people get to view this.
Looking forward to the next in the series!
Glad you enjoyed it!
Great video thanks Ash.
My pleasure!
An important message Ash, many thanks.
This video was like a playback of my own life almost word for word Ash. Whilst not a vodka on my breakfast cornflakes situation, too much of my life revolved around alcohol. I just don't bother with booze now, rarely touch the stuff. In my early 40's I am in the best shape of my life. From a 46 blazer and shortly needing to reach for a 48. Down to a 38 to 40. I have a thing called 'Sunday' back and just so much more energy overall. It's something I am delighted to live without👍
For me, it was like a mini rebirth and it sounds like the same came your way too - I feel so foolish when looking back, the words "what was I thinking?" often come into my head when I think of the hangovers, beer-gut and wasted money. But life is a journey and we have learned from that diversion. On to better things now!!!
@@TheChapsGuide Yes it is a rebirth for sure. Like being trapped in a fog. It is only afterwards you think wow, why did I do that all those years. Onwards and upwards now🙏👍
I came across your channel tonight looking for a review of Sanders shoes and ended up watching this video as well. I'm pleased I did. Cheers.
Great testimony of your journey with alcohol and how you recognized the potential problems with it. I never been one to have a problem with it, but I have lost several friends to it in my teens due to drunk driving. I never get behind the wheel of a vehicle, I've seen first hand the damage it can bring to friends and family. A good dram whisky will last me several hours of enjoyment and never have a second one to be honest.
Have a great day Ash
Hey, this is amazing Ash and very vulnerable of you. From NZ and my background is very similar. Blue collar community growing up where the pub was king. 39 now and mostly a good relationship with the booze, a few beers during the week, and a cheeky negroni in the weekend, but it's taken me a while to get it within a healthy level. Feel so much better for understanding my limits and the value I get out of it. By the way, lovely peacoat, is it a Gloverall or something just as dapper?
Genuine US Navy issue - £22 from Ebay
@@TheChapsGuide Military surplus has some of the best stuff.
Thank you Ash, I really enjoyed this very honest, frank, analytical (and also educational) video conversation. Fortunately, I have never really had too many problems associated with the demon drink (2/12 in the very useful AA online test). I am sure that in years gone by I was probably on/off touching a 3-4-5 but having witnessed in others the very negative affects that a 'drinking culture' imparts to peoples lives, managed to stay well clear of that loop.
A few nice wines and the odd Bombay GnT are basically my thing. I also notice (in Australia), with its drinking culture, most people spend far more on their drinks than on their food when eating out at a restaurant - and that is not by virtue of choosing the most expensive of wines on the list.... I look forwards to your next video, an interesting change in perspective.... All the best.
Great vid; thanks. A good thing you got control before damaging your job or marriage. Me? All through grad school I worked in the bohemian saloons, tending bar and playing music. Wonderful times, but also horribly dangerous, in ways I’m now aware of. After the academic job market suddenly fell apart I was forced to take a job driving taxis - but I sobered up quick, and stayed that way until now.
Will I go back? My heart and lungs are in great shape, so I’ll no doubt contract some exotic form of cancer eventually. When it happens I’ll stock up on my favorites - Heineken, Jameson, Glenfiddich - put on my headphones, play air guitar with Jimi, have a party, and go out in style.
Bravo sir, bravo
So many comments attest to the prevalence of this issue in the male population Ash.
I have just woken up on a Sunday morning without a hangover for the first time in a long time.
Men should be more open about this issue and thank you for being the catalyst that may push the concern forward Ash.
I have just read the recent autobiography of Matthew Perry (recently deceased). It charts his addiction journey - well worth reading if you want to explore the depths of addiction further.
Thank you Ash for having the courage to talk about it so openly. That takes courage, and I salute you for that. I need one hand to count the glasses of beer or wine I drink in a year. In my young adulthood life, I was the weird guy who would not drink much, like you have described it. People laughed at me. Especially during my service in the Swiss Army. Today, I hear from people that I am a responsible person because of my non-drinking habit. I wish that would have been acknowledged the same way 25 years ago.
Thanks for your open and brave account of your experience with alcohol. I too grew up in a town where I was able to celebrate my 16th birthday in a bar. Not a good thing even if I undoubtedly thought so at the time. Looking forward to more in this series on habits.
Excellent advice, well done Sir!
Glad it was helpful!
I often go to bars just to have sodas (and tip 75% or so). One of the most annoying kinds of people is the "let me buy you a drink" guy. I once had a very twitchy guy insist on buying me a drink, which I sheepishly accepted as a one-drink thing. He insisted I sit down (I was pacing because I have ADHD) and then brought his female something over and sat down without even asking. She proceeded to ask me my horoscope, which snapped my social patience, and I just went on a diatribe about how horoscopes are abject pseudoscience and that the premise doesn't even make basic sense. It wasn't my proudest moment, but the lesson of the day is to not force yourself on people by insisting on buying them drinks and inserting yourself into their evening. Some people just want to sit on their phone and have a Roy Rogers.
i stopped drinking in the pubs really in my early 30s (52 now) but then drank a bit in the house- mainly wine, but it's strictly a fri and saturday night now...friday after work i do some exercise then relax to some tunes... saturday is normally is based around food - whether it be a pub or restaurant, or during lockdown a takeway etc... :)
it's just finding that balance...
wow...did some typos there haha..! edited now..
What a great video, fantastic message.
Billy Connally, speaking of Scotland specifically, but actually including most Celtic cultures, said in contrast to most over cultures where alcohol is an adjacent aspect, for the Celts alcohol is the central focus, especially among men, and combined with a personal dysfunctional backgrounds, leads to very dysfunctional current lives.
Tea total for almost 13 years. Best thing I ever did .
Me: gets home from work, cracks a beer.
Oh look Chaps Guide New video
Cooking diner watching Ash
Finishing beer about to pour a G&T 😳
But hey I live in Australia and I have just been able to get my hands on a bottle of silent pool haha
Thank you for the video quite right!
I've barely touched a drop in 2022 but after a heavy few weeks it was turning around and Ash to the rescue!
As Oscar Wilde said Everything in moderation,including moderation!
Valuable video. I admire your coat. Reminds me of my pea coat. Is that molten wool?
Genuine US Issue.
Beer is very fattening, but it don't half taste good,
Try being a witty chap on coffe and fizzy water!
I started to drink and eat too much during the first lock down. I was knocking back the rum and cokes every night with my evening meal, I think it was because apathy, worry and boredom had set in. I have always been active and enjoy lots of walking and days out in the countryside and because I was unable to do this I took solace from food and drink which caused me to put on more than a stone in weight. I have gradually reduced my drink and trying to eat healthier, it's difficult but I know I will get there.
This video has helped to boost my motivation a little bit more. Thank you.
Good luck sir - you will achieve your goals!!
Well said, and thank you for saying it! I am of Native American heritage and I must be very careful with my relationship with alcohol. I appreciate you sharing your history with us.
Other than the fact that my family comes from a long line of factory workers, watching this video was like listening to my own autobiography! As a Marine, alcohol was a large part of the culture and traditions of the Corps. As a young copper, the stress of the job and the things you witnessed take there toll and it was just expected that a drink or two after your shift was the way to cope. 24 years ago, I woke up to the fact that alcohol was not the proper go-to solution. 24 years sober, never once looked back. I cannot express how much I enjoy your videos, and your advice.
Wonderful video. I'm new to the channel, but this is the sort of thing that a lot of gentlemen's channels don't mention (much). Thank you for your openness. It makes me want to see the rest of this kind of content. I can definitely relate to much of what you said, though on a much lighter scale.
Glad you enjoyed it!
What a heartfelt episode Ash, it certainly fleshed out the man behind the Chap! I spent many years in research as a young man where nights in the pub were part of the culture and Saturdays were merely recovery days. When I turned 40 I opted to start running and have now run a number of races up to half marathon. I abandoned alcohol entirely a few years back as a result of a migraine diagnosis and don’t it’s it at all. In fact there a many great alternatives out there if you look. I am now fitter and more accomplished than I have ever been and it allows everyday to be a pleasure as I watch my teenage daughter grow up and learn team up with my wife to run our businesses together. Hats off to you once again sir! Mark
Thanks Mark.