My Filipino friends have told me, “If we invite people the night before, they will show up. If we invite a week in advance, they will probably not show up.”
What abt Guest need to do shopping, Do they come Wearing old clothes to a wedding? Some guests like cousin or family friends are expected to help the groom or Bride's parents (whichever side they are from ) in all important chores there or help bride n groom dress up n make up, etc. So they need to prepare to be responsible guests to work there too etc 😂 And also in our country we do have a ring ceremony or engagement which is not a private affair but an extended family event of showing that 'A love couple is officially bethroted, or promised by their parents, n their love is approved by elders' in front of all relatives, N the couple is introduced n declared as 'Officially an engaged couple' to all families n friends, So it's still not ppl fell in love n themselves decide when to get engaged or marry n privately wear rings in a Lover's point, it's instead asking permission from ur elders for ur approval then if they approve they engage u both with the help of a priest in front of extended family in a banquet hall or a temple, or such place
This is true if wedding is on a weekend, but for weekdays people need to file for leave. Only people in the entourage needs advanced notice to prep outfits. Most people just attend the reception.
if someone invites me the day before, they probably dont expect me to wear anything fancy just show up.. but invite me one week and i'd panic on what to wear 😂
I know you two guys really found each other, but unfortunately there are arrogant insufferable German men who think they can bribe girls to marry them because they think they can escape poverty. So I'm sorry it takes you so many documents, but as a German I'm happy that my country makes it difficult for the men I spoke of. It is a protection for vulnerable women
You can marry in Denmark. Way less documents needed, the certificate is accepted in Germany and no interpreter needed since they marry you in English. You can also issue a German marriage certificate based on the Danish one for like 45€. Just fyi.
"In Vietnam I can call them [guests] a night before the wedding and they'll show up" 💀 as a fellow asian, I think the same can be said for Filipinos as well. Hell, they might even arrive bringing drinks and lumpia/pancit noodles like it were a potluck to help the couple celebrate if it were that late 😂
Y'all guests are bringing food?? Damn, I guess I should have Filipinos as my wedding guest, in my country wedding catering is the most important thing coz some guests might bring their entire household and packed the food in the container to take away back home ☠️🤣🤣
@@Aristya8849 that's not true. no one's gonna show up with food. but if the wedding is in the province and the family is doing the cooking, the neighbors and relatives will help you prepare food.
Yep same as Chamorros. I love the potlucks but it sucks because many wedding venues in the states only allow approved vendors. Luckily my food was cooked and actually good. My friend's wedding hers was plated (had servers too) and food was undercooked.
You’re just so cute and charming! I’m part Vietnamese and you just make me smile every time I hear you talk or I see your clips and videos. Thank you for sharing your life and the differences between your and your soon-to-be husband’s two cultures. And especially, thank you for sharing Vietnam. I’ve never been though I have three half sisters there. Regarding weddings and in-laws, I find it hilarious and am happy to hear that my family honors the Vietnamese ways. My husband calls my mom “mom” and I know that if my mom called any of her friends for ANY reason, they would drop everything and come, just like that. Wedding, funeral, party, hospitalization, whatever. Her friends AND THEIR SPOUSES would all be there and would bring food with them. 🥰😂
in the Philippines, even if you don't invite them, they show up. People are already waiting for your wedding even before you decide to get married. They even ask you when you'll get married even though you don't have a boy/girlfriend...😂😂😂
Same in Bangladesh. We always prepare extra food. You invite a family then they decides to bring husband-wives family, neighbours or any guests staying at their place that day.
I think she is being sarcastic for saying , “inviting someone the night before”… As a Vietnamese, no one does this… In fact, it’s considered to be impolite and disrespectful to the guess and by vice versa… Usually invitation is given out 2 months earlier and a reply from the guest is sent back so to know how many people are expected to come… Often, the guest replies back with money and states the reason not to come (due to certain circumstances).
@@verumverba5711I think it applies for closest friends only. And they really show up. Some might find it rude. But some don't mind, as long as you invited them with your own mouth. Not someone mouth cause they think you just invited them insincerely. That's my own two cent only not everyone else.
@@thaqwacarpet3685 I’m Vietnamese…Trust me, I know my customs and cultures more than you would like to believe 😂 And it doesn’t work like what you said… Sorry mate but wedding has a long traditions and customs behind it… You should watch how the groom goes to the bride’s house and picks her up…that will tell you it takes a lot of effort from everyone around and no one has time for the night before to make any plans! Another thing, Uyen is from the north so her family is more strict on wedding than you want to believe otherwise…
@@verumverba5711 of course you're right. I never said that you're wrong. But it does happen. Just video call and voila they came. But like I said only closest family or friends only. Because there are some that piss that they got invited at last minutes.
@@thaqwacarpet3685 Of course how can I be wrong since I’m a Vietnamese that knows my culture and traditions… 😂 Seriously, the only thing that would work for 1 night notice and get a friend at your wedding is when that Vietnamese is eloping 🤫😂
My family would've been like this... Relative 1: Isn't it _____ wedding today? Relative 2: is it? Relative 1: yeah, I think so.... Relative 2: so.... Wanna go? Relative 1: sure, why not?... -leaves- -shows up at the wedding looking like they totally prepared 1 week in advance- 😭💀
Honestly, without having a plan to attend a wedding or birthday is the best thing you can get as a celebrant. 😂 You expect few visitors and then most of them will show up on your special day.
Dang. I hope it all works out. We got married for free on the courthouse steps on valentine's day. Just needed the marriage license 72hrs before the ceremony. $35. Got my dress at a thrift shop, $20. 25yrs later and I don't regret not having a huge expensive wedding.
Apparently there is a correlation between keeping costs low and having a long marriage. To make matters difficult there is also a correlation between the number of guests and the length of the marriage. Remember that correlation is not causation.
@@resourcedragon That's is very interesting! We decided we didn't need to go into debt feeding and boozing everyone. Which, let's be honest. Are there just for the free party. 🤷🏽♀️ They only people at our wedding were my mom and my paternal grandma. We went to Lubys cafeteria to celebrate afterwards. It was perfect. 🫶🏽
You can definitely keep it simple. People make life more expensive and more complicated for themselves. Rings range from 1 dollar to 20k , wine bottles between 10 dollar and 200 dollar. But they all do the same thing ....and are almost unnecessary to start with.
Same, I got the marriage license, we got married at a church where I was friends with the priest, we ordered lunch from a local restaurant that delivered, we brewed our own beer and wine, just 35 people and it was great. I got my dress for $35 from a thrift store. We saved our money to buy a house. No regrets at all!
In my hometown the longest distance to travel to a place takes 15 minutes so the wedding invitation comes on the very same day it happens ( usually 4 to 5 hours before is starts) . Since we are a closely packed community , everyone gets an invitation!
Does nobody work or go to school or have extracurriculars? Lol. Where I live if anyone gets an invitation anywhere last minute nobody is free because they already have other plans or commitments.
My mom once told me that where she is from the school owns the only cemetery next door so that whenever any one died in the area they got a free burial and the whole school showed up.
You don’t have to have a big wedding. You can have a small one. All that matters is that you both are happy with the wedding- it is about the two of you not everyone else. Congrats and wish you both a king and happy marriage ❤
I think it doesn’t work in that way in Vietnam. I’m in relation with Viet man, and as I know we should invite for our marriage all his Vietnamese familly from Vietnam and France. For Vietnamese it’s a union of two families.
Yeah, nowadays it's more common to have the signing with a few people and hold a separate celebration from my experience. Sometimes even multiple small ones depending on how involved you want to get with each social circle.
My cousin had the same problem about all the documents his fiance needed. They ended up getting married in Denmark. It's part of the EU and didn't require anywhere near the paperwork. They then had the reception in Germany.
I got married at the Copenhagen Opera House to my German husband because it was easier also 😂It was so straightforward and registering the marriage back in Munich was also surprisingly easy!
In Finland you call EVERYONE by their first name? Same as in America. I hate that familiarity by strangers or actually by anyone who isn't a close relative or close friend. That behavior hasn't become common in Europe has it? I've always admired the etiquette and formalness of Europeans.
@@sunshineandwarmth I think it's great, you don't need to worry about people's "statuses" at all! I can't speak for all europe, but at least the nordic countries works this way, and has since (I would guess) the 70tees-ish
@@sunshineandwarmth: Australia is a first name culture. The downside is that if you've been given a difficult or a stupid name, it can make life unpleasant. (I ended up deed-polling my difficult first name - one of the best moves I ever made.) Most European languages (although I suspect Finnish, Latvian and Hungarian may be different) have both familiar and formal second person pronouns. During the past 50 years the informal pronouns have gone back to being used as singular second person (which is what they were originally) and the formal pronouns are being reserved for use as plurals (or when you really can't get away with using a less formal form). I have to admit, I was a bit thrown the first time someone who wasn't family addressed me as "tú" in Spanish! (Also a bit thrown by the fact that they were using subject pronouns, the dialect I know generally leaves out the subject pronoun because the verb tells you what it is.) Now I'm trying to bring back singular second person pronouns into English (properly declined and used with the correct conjugations of verbs, of course).
During Covid time my brother kept on planning his wedding but had to move the date thrice due to multiple lockdowns in India. As my sister in law's family is from Mumbai & we are from South India, restrictions made it harder. Eventually when things opened up, they both decided to get married on the next auspicious date which was in 3 weeks. Our entire family & friends group of 200+ members showed up to the wedding in Mumbai in 3 weeks notice! It was a blast & indeed a great time, everyone pitched in & helped in arranging stuff too.
Do parents or a spiritual leader generally decide on what is an auspicious date? I am Chinese and loosely know there are some special calendars people believe in (my family doesn't) and I think a lot of South Eastern cultures are similar. Does it mean on say an arbitrary suspicious date, (just for example 5/6/2023 this year) a lottt of couples in India will get married -- the courthouse and wedding venues will be packed? Or are there more calculations that customize the wedding date based on the couples birthdates and similar astrological info? For context I grew up in a hyper modern country and my generation are mostly very eager to eschew any religious-backed logic in life planning. So I never got to see people take those things seriously, which is a pity because I think it's so fascinating how hundreds of generations before us built these traditional constructs to guide others in life before things like science and education came around.
@@p_roduct9211 Auspicious dates depend on the horoscope of the bride & groom & are different for different couples. But the priest gives you atleast 7-8 options in the next few months so that you can pick a suitable date ( falling on weekend etc)
I paid 75€ to get married, plus 2x20€ to the Geburtenregisterauszug for me and the Wife. We only married standesamtlich, no Church wedding. Purely the paperwork only,no fuss, done in 15 minutes at City Hall. We applied for the license 3 months earlier,my wife got pregnant and it's less of a hassle for tax and parenting reasons if you're married
It gets super complicated when a non-German or worse yet a non-EU-citizen is involved because all the necessary paperwork (passport, birth certificate, marriageability certificate, no objection certificate etc) needs to be verified by the German consulate/embassy in the country of origin of the non-German spouse. In many countries, there is no such thing as eg. a 'marriageability certificate' so you need to jump through some extra legal hoops to get something that approximates to it. And the local German consulates/embassies often take their sweet time doing that work. It's a very daunting experience. Both money and time-consuming. German administrative processes work great if it only involves two people who were born inside the system. The moment foreign papers are involved, it's a nightmare.
@@bremCZ Wedding = unnecessary responsibility, preparation, and money. I probably have a dumb opinion but as I see it it's a waste of money as you're most likely getting divorced anyway.
A tip for wedding planning is that if sth is branded as 'for weddings' it'll be wayyy more expensive because it's generally accepted that weddings are expensive. You can just say that you're preparing an event and you'll get the normal prices.
I’ve seen this “tip” said before but some people pointed out there that its more expensive to do weddings because of the higher expectations that usually come with a wedding. Imagine an event photoshoot vs. a wedding photoshoot. The first one is probably looser with the shots you expect to get and you probably only need to get the main events planned plus you could always call people over for a photo-op, but in a wedding, theres a lot more pressure to get those beautiful candid shots where you only have one chance to capture. Just be warned that if you do this, dont expect the services to be perfect nor expect them to cater to all your demands if they charge differently for a wedding but you only paid for a normal event. Also if you do do this, some people who’ve worked in services that were also tricked like this said that they hated the people who do this and I wouldn’t fault them for blacklisting people who do this after that.
What a terrible tip. Being honest with yourself and people around you is definitely better if you're planning a one in a lifetime event like the wedding. It's so disrespectful to the business to lie to them when you don't even know if their pricing for weddings really is different. Just find an honest business and tell them that you'd like to have a budget wedding. Be upfront and have at least the decency to not spread your ignorance around by giving out such terrible tips.
Wedding costs vary! A simple wedding (at the Einwohnermeldeamt) cost us only 120€ (if i remember correctly). What makes it expensive is if you have a big party with friends and family, if you have a special venue, expensive (we got ours on etsy for 120€😂) rings aso.
I thought so. People make things more expensive and they complain. For me, a 100 dollar ring looks exactly the same as a 5k ring. A 10 dollar wine tastes exactly the same as a 120 dollar wine. Etc😂
Yeah, and a divorce starts around 3000-5000 € up. Lol, so having a Rechtschutzversicherung could help. How do the guests dress at wedding in Vietnam? If they can show up the next they if you call them? Because Mexican women get an appointment at the hairdresser and Make up, plus need a new dress. Men can rent a siut.
Wedding costs are entirely dependent on the people holding the wedding. I've been to fancy, expensive weddings, but I've also been to weddings held in parks, (some with no chairs,) with some takeout, pot luck, or no food, and everybody just happily danced to a playlist on a Bluetooth speaker. Do what you want, be happy, and don't go into debt over it.
@@lalahana111 There's no way there's a country where full course dinner for multiple guests, a cake sitting in a fancy hall, and a music band for hire are cheaper than gathering some friends and relatives on a plot of grass with some fast food takeout or a grill to make things interesting.
I'm so happy for you two!!! I have a small tip: if you rent a room for the wedding area just say you're hosting a party, it's the same room just wayyyy less expensive. Wedding discrimination is real
So true, ordered 3 plain white cakes, but didn't say it was for a wedding, the bakery found out it was for a wedding and tripled the price, for the same darned cakes.
Or tell them it's an engagement party that's cheap like a birthday, but then you arrive and be like it's a surprise wedding! A friend did that for her 30th and the cake venue and food was cheaper as a birthday than if she had told them it was a surprise wedding.
Maybe you already know- but many of my friends who were Germans marrying internationals, come to Denmark (Copenhagen) for the wedding registration. It is a very simple process here. Then they go back and do a party back in Germany😊. Good luck!
My husband is german but we both live in Denmark. They offered for us to make it more simpler and do in DK, however, to pay for 65 peoples accommodation in Denmark would have been way too expensive. I only needed like 2 papers more for Germany, so it‘s not as complicated there either.
Oops just commented this as well. But we did this and it is waaaayyy easier. Also you get to have vacation in Denmark. An absolute bonus. We also visited the Lego House in Billund, where Lego was invented. Great fun.
wow seriously a year?😂 you're right, here in Indo we can also invite guests anytime we want, even friends would come anyway without invitations just for foods and messing around with the couple😁 by the way congratulations
A few months in advance are usually enough. My sister is getting married in June and invitations came at the end of February. Some people do a year but I personally think that is too long.
I have been to several weddings in Germany and none of those invited the guests a whole years prior to the actual event. Most couples will invite the guests about 6 months prior though. The main reason for this is that a wedding in germany usually is a whole day event with partying at night. So the couple wants to make sure that all of their loved ones can make time to spend their special day with them. Also, other than in a lot of Asian countries, guests often don't simply give money to the married couple but also prepare special gifts for the couple, they prepare speeches and often organize fun games that will be played at the wedding day. So yeah by inviting guests early everyone can make sure to have time on that special day and if they are close to the couple they also have time to prepare some special memorable gifts.
I think the most insane part is calling your spouse 's parents by their names 😂 in India we can't even call any middle aged man/woman by their names..we have to address them atleast uncle nd aunty 😍
If we did that in Germany the least we would get is a weird look or a scolding. It's like rude to call someone not related to you uncle or aunt. It either is seen as impolite or rude as you just called them old. And calling someone grandpa/grandma is an actual insult here if the person is not your actual grandpa or someone close.
@@xman7695 wow that so different from my country... Calling someone not uncle or aunty or grandpa or grandma even though they are strangers are rude... Calling them uncle/aunty is like respect to us, respect to the one older than you and even of they are just a year or two older we have honorifics for that too. Calling by name of someone who is older than you is straight up rude.. You only call people by name if you are the same age or they are younger than you. Honorifics are very important to us.. We are so opposite.
@@euchiii3596 in German, we just use different pronouns for people we are close with and people we don't know and adress more formally. Words like auntie would imply much more closeness to strangers than we actually feel and would feel wrong for us because of that. But by using the "formal you" instead of the "informal you" we might have a different but still comparable way of showing respect to people because especially elders (that are not family) are adressed formally until they ask you to switch to the "informal you" 😅 hope that explaination makes sense
We also adress strangers and people we are not familiar with (that includes collegues depending on the work environment) with their last name, friends with their first name and the closest family with their title. My actual uncle, aunt, grandma and grandpa would feel very weird if I didn't call them by that title as well. I think they would feel disrespected then. We just don't use these titles apart from our family. For family members like in laws and step parents, it depends more on personal preference. If I consider my step mom more of a real mom, I call her mom, if I don't, I call her by her first name. Its the same for the mother in law. But as we get to know them so late in our lives, most of us rather use their first name than calling them mom.
@@c.m.8972 Yes, of course... I understand 😊😊 we have very different cultures and have different way of expressing it. What shocking to me most are the people in the West who calls their parents by their names, if that ever happen in my culture, the slipper, wooden spoon or broom will be waiting for you or worst be disowned. 😂
My cousin (Australian) and his now wife (Irish) were the same. They lived in Australia but we're getting married in Ireland (where weddings are also ridiculously expensive.) They ended up having a three year engagement in order to be able to save as much money as possible, and the advanced notice also meant that those of us coming from Australia/overseas would have time to save for the travel as well.
Weddings are expensive in Australia too.. don't get ne wrong some people opt for a beach/park free public venue abd then a BBQ and piss up vut that is not a common Aussie wedding
i feel like thats part of the reason for the advanced notice now, is just that the planning can take so long with finding an available venue (or finding and open date if you wanna have it in a particular place) etc, and saving to reserve everything-
I@@samanthacook6803it should be. If I ever have a wedding it will literally be the two witnesses and the celebrant on a beach and like a super fancy dinner or something for just a few people.
@@samanthacook6803 my uncle and aunt threw a surprise wedding at their sons first birthday party (byo picnic in the park) 😅 halfway through they were like so yeah we're just gonna get married now since you're all here already 😂 it was a great super affordable option. They just celebrate their wedding anniversary on a different day.
My region of Germany is notoriously traditional and my home town may as well be stuck in the 1800s, so I can relate to a lot of these 😭 my dad calls my mum’s parents mum and dad and you usually invite wedding guests like two days before hand, mainly because we often just wear tracht or nice clothing to weddings so no one needs to go out and buy anything. Further more weddings are always in churches and it’s pretty much free to rent the local church so the wedding ends up being very inexpensive 😅
@@fangirlinneverland6335 I come from a region in Hesse, I won’t say exactly because it would literally give away my location because the region name is the same as the town but I’m from Hesse
@@Zenaidafromthemoon I'm from Germany too but not really from a rural area so I had no idea that you would actually invite the guests only 2 days before the wedding!
In Cameroon(Africa) we do not need invitations. we just show up uninvited on the day of the wedding, we eat, drink and make sure we have takeaways. I love Africa🌍
I saw a RUclips video about a Japanese wedding. It was brilliant. The couple went to a government office, took a queue number and managed to submit some papers to a civil servant who disappeared somewhere. Eventually he came back and said nothing. The couple got a bit confused and asked the civil servant: "Are we married?" The civil servant replied: "Yes, you are." The whole situation was fantastic. I don't want to get married in this life. However, if I need to go through that traumatising experience, I demand a Japanese urban wedding. During those you don't even find out if you are married unless you ask the civil servant. It is so relaxing. A superior way of doing things.
My wedding went down similarly here in Germany. It was on a Monday at 9am, we went to the local government office and were married in 15 minutes. Then we went to work 😅 We didn't want the stress of planning an expensive party for people who don't really care just to please our parents. We blamed it on.covid but honestly we always wanted it that way.
@@rrr441 Brilliant. And great strategy blaming it on Covid. But I think in Germany the civil servant tells you that you are now married? And there is a minimalist ceremony/routine? The Japanese version was like renewing your passport. Or even less than that.
@@LLNTMY Yes!!! I think they went to have a meal later. But the wedding was awesome. Especially the part of not finding out if you are married unless you ask. I can imagine some people going through that process and NOT ASKING anything. A few days later someone wants to know if they are married. The answer: "Er...it is possible." p.s. I think they are a tiny bit rebels. The woman is Japanese and the man is not. I don't think it is viewed well in Japan? They also had a baby. With an epidural! That is not common in Japan and there are very few clinics that offer it 24/7. I can imagine a European woman giving birth in Japan. European: "I'd like an epidural." Japanese doctor: "Hahahahaaaa... Dream on, oh noble patient! In Japan real mothers suffer pain. Please be kind and suffer pain. What kind of tea can I offer you?"
Yeah same thing with the guests. The more guests (particularly if they're not your immediate friends and family) you have the more notice you give so they can properly plan around your event. If it's immediate family, well calling them up the night before might ruffle some feathers, but just dropping "hey so we're thinking about getting married on Saturday two weeks for now, anyone wanna tag along?" to your immediate friends and family _could_ work out. If you're like me and don't have friends or family, it's even easier!
@@Straightastheycome "Stand" doesn't mean "stand" in the name of the office, but "status". Some changes in the official register are done by this office.
Yeah but doesn't stop someone from wanting it. I'd council my kids not to go crazy: it's just a party surrounded by a 5 minute ceremony ... but... yeah maybe it's good God doesn't make me rich. I'd do fireworks for my girls if I had Elon Musk $$$$.
I think this is because in the West, like Germany, if somebody RSVPs a "yes" - it is a hard YES. Here in the US, people plan extremely small details including seating arrangements or food menu based on who is coming or not coming. So, guests also conversely want prior notification so they can block their calendars for a guaranteed attendance. In many Asian countries, it is more fluid. You invite a lot of people - like 5000 - some show up, some don't, but there won't be any planning changes because someone didn't show up or someone unexpected showed up. You couldn't find a seat? Well, stand and eat. Are you allergic to things? Bring food from home then. It is more like a public event - where you are responsible for yourself.
We did our civil wedding in Denmark to avoid the red tape in Germany. The location was super nice (definitely better than our city's courthouse). We invited our closest family members and friends to Denmark and spent the weekend there.
@@lauraj0205 In our case the proof of eligibility for marriage for my husband. The process of proving his eligibility would have been long and tedious as it involves different authorities in Germany and abroad (e.g. local foreign office, embassy, local court). Denmark does not require a proof of eligibility. Generally the process of getting married is much faster in Denmark. You can get married within four weeks of starting the process/formalities even as a non-national.
@@julezhu1893 For some reason, this step is more annoying than it needs to be. We had the most simple case (2 EU nationals, no prior marriage, no children, no divorce) but it still took a while. Travelling wasn't an option for us.
@@julezhu1893 You have to prove that you're not already married?? Is that what that certificate is? It makes me wonder what previous events caused there to be such a certificate.
One of the best weddings i have ever been to was hosted by the groom's mother in her front yard and backyard. Guests could camp out and sleep in a tent. They ordered a moving fridge for the beer and drinks. And food was bring a dish by all the guests. Entertainment wise, the bride had bought loads temporary tattoos, there was a guitar standing around and then there were children and Seifenblasen. And it was a whole weekend! The bride and groom were super chilled, didn't sweat the small stuff, nothing fancy. Just a bunch of people having a nice time :)
I am German and our engagement was just 6 months before the actual wedding so all of our guests where invited like 4 1/2 months before our wedding. I hate getting invitations a year in advance. I dont even know what to eat tonight so I have no clue if I want to go to a wedding in 12 months 😱
As a Chinese/Hongkonger, it is quite impossible to invite someone to a Chinese wedding just one night before. (While a western one, it is possible). As you have to prepare tables and foods for them. So at least several months in advance.
Many people merry abroad and just have the marriage recognized in Germany... you may want to look into that because it may be more efficient... you can always have a big party with friends and family when you are back... since you already have a residency permit, there will be no issue returning to Germany... Also the wedding itself will just be an admin fee at city hall.. what is expensive is the party, the dress, etc. and of course if you are not a citizen you need to submit a zillion docs in certified translation 😉
@A plus you clearly have no idea of all the bureaucracy involved in marrying in Germany as a foreigner and the paperwork you need to supply with certified translation.. it is a hassle which is why many people indeed marry abroad and my sister is eternally engaged... a colleague did it in the Caribbean and had a nice honeymoon to boot and then had a party with friends when backbin Germany as they were both non-citizens ... there is nothing patronizing about the suggestion ... something to consider unless they are set on marrying here for whatever reason... and heck it is their party and they can do it any which way they want ...
A hearty congratulations to you... I am no where near marraige age but as I am seeing my Mom struggle alot with her husband and his family even after 19yrs of marraige...I have always hoped nobody struggle like that...Have a Happy life from me and my Mom... we are a big fan of yours and wish you the best!!! "Imperfections makes things Perfect"!!! ❤❤❤
I'm also very happy to have a Chinese friend since she knows how to show up spontaneously. My old friends from Germany are all so "busy". I don't like to make endless time advance appointments with them so we don't meet. 😂
@@TheFren wedding is important so unless it’s a life and death situation OR work related or vacation related, then we go. Other commitments can be rearranged
@@Serena-or7sl It's a wedding not a game of Tennis. Europeans need to not take themselves so seriously. No one is going to be offended if it can be rearranged quickly, especially if it's just a chat over cake and coffee.
I've noticed Germany is very similar to the US in this way. Its cool hearing comparisons with Vietnam. And my goodness, they'd just come so soon! Love you videos, Happy wedding planning!
Usually you send out invitations about 5 weeks in advance of the wedding in the US, not a year. Weddings can be as cheap or as expensive as you want and all you have to have is a marriage license, so no it really not like Germany at all in the US. Thank God.
@@dalemoore8582 I know, I live in the US. You technically don't even need to get married on paper for a wedding (my parents did this for college purposes). To me it seems kinda similar, my parents sent out invitations at least a year in advance due to travel since my family is well spread out throughout the US.
My husband and I got married at home with only the people we wanted there. It was really special ❤️ Edit: I'm American and my in-laws are Bulgarian, husband was a citizen. Neither side was happy, but we literally didn't care... The date and taxes were more important. We also told people not to send us money or gifts 😁 Weddings in the SF Bay Area cost $20k-$40k+. We saved for a home instead. Edit: No, y'all. I got MARRIED at home, in my living room, with 15 witnesses, in California. It was a Wednesday: 12/12/12, why would we throw a big wedding on a Wednesday? We had more people over the following Saturday from out of town. Did we SAY we'd have a "big wedding" in a year? Yes. Did we? No... Again, we put a down payment on a house for a 1-year anniversary instead. The the US, Marriage licenses are just picked up at the county office and as long as you are officiated in that county it's perfectly legal.
@@CapHH i think you missunderstood, bet she meant she married in the "standesamt" but had the wedding party at home. I was also participating in such a wedding.
In Pakistan we invite people to our wedding at least 2 to 3 weeks earlier. If you invite them 1 day before wedding they will not come to wedding even they will near to your home . They think the wedding don't need them .
I might be misunderstanding your comment but if I got you correctly, if she were getting married to a vietnamese in Vietnam, i don't think she would need all those papers. I think she only needs those papers because of German legal requirements.
@@fejiroohanomah7453 No, you understood correctly, but I sometimes forget that my irony and sarcasm does not translate well in writing. Of course it is because she is living in Germany, but one year waiting because the Vietnamese bureaucracy, is the same like inviting Germans: the weeding will be in a year. How do I know that it is the Vietnamese bureaucracy. Friend of mine married someone from Iran and it took them also a year, and another friend of mine married in Australia and that took a few weeks for the papers.
@@fejiroohanomah7453 And the part that you have to invite Germans a year prior to the wedding is exaggerated, usually 2-3 month, exceptions can happen especially when you want to marry during summertime when many people are on vacation.
@@Vajshan ohhhhhh..... now I understand your comment perfectly. Thank you for clarifying even though you didn't need to. I can relate to the bureaucracy part because in my country, lots of official documentation take too long for the same reason.
Congratulations and good luck!🤞 We had our wedding last year in Prague and when we started looking for places they were booked 2 years in advance! 😂 I didnt even know my husband back then 😂😂😂
Why not? I mean, a normal guests would only need to put on a nice clothes and just went over to eat, drink, and congratulate the couples. No difference than "Hey, I crave some burger, wanna dine in our usual restaurant tomorrow?"
@@bluesapphire4262 In some countries especially if you are a close relative you should also bring a gift which is like a gold jewelry, or house item(this is after the wedding day) and it also requires money for guest to attend to a wedding that's why the owners of wedding are able to hold a huge wedding includes lots of relatives it's kind of paying-repaying process and whatever you bought as a gift is returning to you in your wedding like if you have bought a golden bracelet for your cousin that cousin needs to buy a similar value gift and I don't know the logic behind tbh but that's the tradition. Oh and you should be helping to owner's by going to their houses helping them with the food and other stuff at their house right before wedding starts because the bride first comes to her house and say goodbye to her parents and you should be saying good bye to her and if you are groomside then it's the same foods are made etc then you should go to bride house with groom greet her etc some dances and you should be there for them it's also lots of effort..
@@bluesapphire4262 a normal guest would have to prepare gifts (personal not monetary usually) get the day off and maybe even the next day if the party goes after midnight and if it's further away you need travel and accomodation
Weddings in Germany aren't more expensive than anywhere else in the world. You could simply go to registry office and sign the paper and would be legally married, just like in other countries. However if you want to celebrate with a big party, invite dozens of people, have a big buffet, expensive wedding venue etc. then of course it will be very expensive. But big wedding parties will also be expensive in all other countries. Long story short: my point is that a wedding is always just as expensive as you want it to be, in Germany as well as everywhere else 😊
@@danidejaneiro8378 Of course it doesn't cost the EXACT SAME amount of money everywhere, Genius 🙈 But a simple marriage registry at the registry office is pretty cheap everywhere around the world. For Germany it's 40 Euro if the couple both have German citizenship and 80 Euro if at least one of them is a foreigner. Considering the average income for a regular German household that's still pretty cheap. Planning a big wedding can easily get really expensive and planning the same kind of wedding in a different country might be cheaper price wise but also in those countries the families usually have a smaller average income per year. So you have to set costs and income for each country individually into relation. Fancy weddings in South East Asia can be just as expensive as fancy weddings in Europe. So my statement still stands. You can have a cheap wedding or an expensive wedding anywhere around the world.
Actually, that's not even possible everywhere in Australia! In many areas in Australia, you can't get married at town hall/registry office, you need to organise a celebrant. And the cheapest wedding you can do is still over 300$, even if you are allowed to marry at the registry office. It's such a rip off.
@Camille I think $350 sounds okay for what you get, a celebrant who can provide witnesses, the Lodgement of Notice of Intended Marriage submitted 1 month before the marriage so the Department of Births, Deaths and Marriages can check your aren't already married or trying to commit fraud. Registry Marriage Ceremony Fee to cover admin costs at the registry office and a Commonwealth Certified Marriage Certificate to change your name on your ID, etc, after. They can make you free copies they can notarise so you can post them off to change your superannuation and phone bill etc since some places won't accept a photo of the original. If you need a celebrant because there's no registry, then it costs about $420 incl tax and has all the above things too.
I'm American and my husband is British, we got married in the states. The amount of paperwork, costs, and insanity is insane. And I would do it all over again for him
Oh yeah me and my husband (both Americans) got married in Las Vegas. The amount of paperwork alone was crazy. Had we both been Catholic (he is, I am not) we would have been REQUIRED to take at least six weeks of Marriage Classes. His father tried to tell me I HAD to convert after the wedding. My husband and I both told him to shut up and that I am NOT converting.
It’s so good to hear your entire tale of moving to Germany , getting Germanised , finding the love of your life and then getting married to him. It’s amazing , congratulations you two
I don’t think so, other countries are not as strict as Germany, Denmark for example. Many germans who marry non-germans do so in Denmark when it‘s impossible for them to obtain all the necessary documents, for example when the person can‘t go back to their country to get the documents, so they are forced to go to Denmark. It‘s quite bitter and I am sad that we make it so hard for people to get married
Yeah and then have a party in Germany for the German relatives. You could even do a ceremony at the party, but it wouldn't have to be a legal ceremony, just file the paperwork from your Vietnamese wedding.
A wedding really isn't very expensive. It really depends on what you plan/want. My friend just spent EUR 500 for her wedding, and it could have been even less, but she had some special wishes. Good luck with your wedding!
From above comments, it seems like because she's a foreigner, there's alot more things they need to do before getting married. Not necessary expensive for the ceremony itself.
Honestly, it's the difference in their culture. Asians are close-knit big families especially for those in rural areas. According to what I read, some asian weddings can invite 300-500 guests at the same price for Germany's 50 guests.
@@notmyname3556 True. Also if you invite the entire neighborhood or village, they would call come over and help out. Westerners, for some reason think that's weird.
@@lylelaney8270 Not really Westerners, just city folk. Some of my German friends from rural areas have a similar close-knit community in their villages, but most people nowadays live in larger towns and cities where there is no such sense of community.
Some rural places in the Philippines they just anounce it, PA system style. Each small village (called barangay) has a PA system used to announce stuff like weddings, social gatherings, funerals and other such announcements.
Same here in Indonesia we invite people at least 1 or 2 weeks before the wedding. But if we invite them 1 day before, they also will show up at the wedding.😊
_Where_ do your guests come from? Are they people who live in your neighbourhood, or are they from the other side of the country? It's become increasingly common in the west for a lot of wedding guests to be from hundreds, even thousands of miles away, which is why they need so long to prepare.
@@vivida7160because a lot of us works in big cities like Jakarta, Surabaya, or Bandung. Or even different island 😅 you cant just calling them a night before the wedding. That's different story with your neighbors. Yes they gonna show up. They married in front their house not in building or a hotel. 😂😂😂
In Germany, you have a list to pick from where you wanna get married and it’s free because it’s through the state. Your marriage only counts if it’s officiated by a government official. I got married in a medieval church for free.
@mariakhan7986 I know what you mean, my wifes family is vietnamese christians. Her brother married a vietnamese wife at the courthouse here in Denmark for practical reasons, but the family dont rally consider it worth much. They will have a big christian wedding in Vietnam later. But sometimes you have to go with practicalities
Idk how I stumbled upon this page but I have literally fallen in love with y’all’s journey. From way over here in the western hemisphere in North Carolina ❤
Haha I feel the part about 'invitations one Year in advance' 😂 we thought six months were more than enough. Ten months in advance our relatives would start to ask 'when do you finally send out the invitations?!?!'
It's the same in documents and visas for me as a Canadian trying to marry my Scottish fiance. The amount of money I need and documents I need to do is through the roof. And there's a chance where they could reject the documents and I'd have to do it all over again. It's anxiety inducing.
@@KennethGangte Please explain to me why this is better. I find it quite shameful not to invite people that I respect and like in time so they can prepare. If I had to be at a wedding at a few hours' notice, I would most probably have to cancel another appointment at very short notice, and that is just rude and hurtful to the person I would have to do that to in order to attend the wedding. So why does this mean your social fabric is better than ours?
@@KennethGangte There's not a single country in the world more obsessed with materialism than China. Tell me again how that is a Western thing, please.
You don't always have to invite people a year early but it's handy because that way they can plan their vacation days accordingly. But at least a few months early is better
I’m proud of you for putting yourself out there the first video! I know ur a great person and are making a difference with other women who have similar culture issues, it’s not for nothing Congrats on the marriage and stay true (morally)to that first girl who posted! Much love from the west!
You can also just formally wed in Germany. Arrive at the registry office. Pay 60€ and tadah! you are now married. (For you it would be about 120€ though)
I got invited to my friend's wedding the same day at 7am while on my way home from work. Arrived at the church and became the coin bearer. A wedding I will never forget. 🤣🤣🤣
Lol just imagine wearing the same clothes you wore from work and suddenly you're a coin bearer at a wedding! Please don't tell me that's what happened I- 😆
@@rosaaan No, I was able to go back home and change. I finished work at 7 and the wedding was around 9 or 10 so I was able to change. Would have been funny if I was in work clothes.
And you still can't even find a real girl other than those e-girls that you SIMP hard and paying using your parent's credit cards and of course your own left hand. 😊
It was almost the same for my husband and me. We got married in Germany, but we both are from different countries. He is American and I am from Croatia. We both needed 500 documents each, it took us almost a year and half to get everything ready and finally get married. Plus afterwards we had to finish 500 documents. It was a CRAZY ride. 😂❤
It’s simple never EVER tell any vendor you are planning for a wedding. That’s what jacks prices up. Just say it’s a really big get together with family. Wedding just lets vendors know that they can increase prices more than it needs to be… unless it’s something custom. Then the price is usually worth it
Same thing in Poland. Weddings usually take place in holiday period (June to September) and if you won’t send invitations a year in advance people might book holidays and they will end up either having to postpone the trip or they won’t show up. It’s not because we don’t care enough to show up with short notice but rather because we want to respect everybody’s plans and time Edit: Also people like to get hair and makeup appointments before weddings and in period with lots of weddings it’s not easy to book appointment few days before. It’s all about respecting people’s time
Yeah, some commenters mentioned people not being family oriented enough in europe but to me it's a matter of respect as you said. If it's an emergency then I can drop everything but if you don't value me or my time by telling me in advance then you must not be very interested in having me there...
First of all, congratulations. But you don't need to do all that. I got married with 15 guests at a registry office in Germany and it wasn't expensive at all.
![Chlöe - Shake (Feat. Jeremih) [Official Visualizer]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/aDs_1ufpfv8/mqdefault.jpg)
“I can call them the night before the wedding and they show up” 😂😂😂 Love it.
🤣🤣
Love from MCGI💕
Well, i assume that would actually work anywhere in the world.
@@wombolino2343 yeah no. I work in shifts. How should I do that?
same xD
So true😂😂
My Filipino friends have told me, “If we invite people the night before, they will show up. If we invite a week in advance, they will probably not show up.”
What abt Guest need to do shopping, Do they come Wearing old clothes to a wedding?
Some guests like cousin or family friends are expected to help the groom or Bride's parents (whichever side they are from ) in all important chores there or help bride n groom dress up n make up, etc. So they need to prepare to be responsible guests to work there too etc 😂
And also in our country we do have a ring ceremony or engagement which is not a private affair but an extended family event of showing that 'A love couple is officially bethroted, or promised by their parents, n their love is approved by elders' in front of all relatives, N the couple is introduced n declared as 'Officially an engaged couple' to all families n friends, So it's still not ppl fell in love n themselves decide when to get engaged or marry n privately wear rings in a Lover's point, it's instead asking permission from ur elders for ur approval then if they approve they engage u both with the help of a priest in front of extended family in a banquet hall or a temple, or such place
This is true if wedding is on a weekend, but for weekdays people need to file for leave.
Only people in the entourage needs advanced notice to prep outfits.
Most people just attend the reception.
The same in Brazil.
Because the excitement already died down lmao 🤣
if someone invites me the day before, they probably dont expect me to wear anything fancy just show up.. but invite me one week and i'd panic on what to wear 😂
You guys are getting married!?!?! I'm genuinely so happy for you guys. Y'all are so wholesome.
Congratulations!
Lots of love
They already live together. Nothing change especially. They will just officialise their union infront of guests.
@@rijaldat7123 Maybe to you, but the ceremony means a lot to people and it typically does change things-even smaller things like expectations! :)
i would assume so , didn't she move to Germany to live with him 😭 ?
I was excited to hear that too!
@@rijaldat7123 marriage means alot to people actually
In Nigeria they just need to see a party going on and they'd branch even without knowing anyone 😂😂
Exactly how we do. AKA the mogbo moya 😂
What do you mean by branch?
Our style 😂
@@TheAayizebranch= stop over
@@TheAayizesuddenly become family maybe?😂
It's tough but I hope you live the rest of your life together
I know you two guys really found each other, but unfortunately there are arrogant insufferable German men who think they can bribe girls to marry them because they think they can escape poverty.
So I'm sorry it takes you so many documents, but as a German I'm happy that my country makes it difficult for the men I spoke of.
It is a protection for vulnerable women
Like everything for not doing that thing again 😂
You can marry in Denmark. Way less documents needed, the certificate is accepted in Germany and no interpreter needed since they marry you in English. You can also issue a German marriage certificate based on the Danish one for like 45€. Just fyi.
@@walle5667 u should probably comment this as a separate comment so she can see this
@@ConvictedFelon0 yeah
As an asian, it must be awkward to call his parents by name 😂
As an Asian it feels disrespectful to call my friend's parents by their name, don't even need to talk about my spouse's parents.
@@KoishiChan92 u call them aunti uncle
As an european it would feel so weird to have to say mom and dad to her parents.
@@jelle839yea same
It’s about mutual respect for different cultures when your not Marrying your own
"In Vietnam I can call them [guests] a night before the wedding and they'll show up" 💀 as a fellow asian, I think the same can be said for Filipinos as well. Hell, they might even arrive bringing drinks and lumpia/pancit noodles like it were a potluck to help the couple celebrate if it were that late 😂
Y'all guests are bringing food?? Damn, I guess I should have Filipinos as my wedding guest, in my country wedding catering is the most important thing coz some guests might bring their entire household and packed the food in the container to take away back home ☠️🤣🤣
@@Aristya8849 that's not true. no one's gonna show up with food. but if the wedding is in the province and the family is doing the cooking, the neighbors and relatives will help you prepare food.
@@sofia_calista yep. Many will arrive early. Or days in advance to help with prep.
I miss my coworker's pancit. Gift from the Gods. 😋
Yep same as Chamorros. I love the potlucks but it sucks because many wedding venues in the states only allow approved vendors. Luckily my food was cooked and actually good. My friend's wedding hers was plated (had servers too) and food was undercooked.
You’re just so cute and charming! I’m part Vietnamese and you just make me smile every time I hear you talk or I see your clips and videos. Thank you for sharing your life and the differences between your and your soon-to-be husband’s two cultures. And especially, thank you for sharing Vietnam. I’ve never been though I have three half sisters there.
Regarding weddings and in-laws, I find it hilarious and am happy to hear that my family honors the Vietnamese ways. My husband calls my mom “mom” and I know that if my mom called any of her friends for ANY reason, they would drop everything and come, just like that. Wedding, funeral, party, hospitalization, whatever. Her friends AND THEIR SPOUSES would all be there and would bring food with them. 🥰😂
The ultimate Asian culture ♥️♥️😂
in the Philippines, even if you don't invite them, they show up. People are already waiting for your wedding even before you decide to get married. They even ask you when you'll get married even though you don't have a boy/girlfriend...😂😂😂
As a Nigerian, I always prepare for uninvited guests regardless of how small the gathering.
Same in India
lol they always invite their friends or distant relatives. Each gathering I go to I meet someone new 🤣
Same in Bangladesh. We always prepare extra food. You invite a family then they decides to bring husband-wives family, neighbours or any guests staying at their place that day.
Ahaha in my country they try to find a spouse 😂 so you can get married faster. After marriage they ask when you're having a baby 😂
As an Indian, i can confirm that we do invite people 2-3 days before the wedding and most of them show up for all the celebrations😂
I think she is being sarcastic for saying , “inviting someone the night before”… As a Vietnamese, no one does this… In fact, it’s considered to be impolite and disrespectful to the guess and by vice versa… Usually invitation is given out 2 months earlier and a reply from the guest is sent back so to know how many people are expected to come… Often, the guest replies back with money and states the reason not to come (due to certain circumstances).
@@verumverba5711I think it applies for closest friends only. And they really show up. Some might find it rude. But some don't mind, as long as you invited them with your own mouth. Not someone mouth cause they think you just invited them insincerely. That's my own two cent only not everyone else.
@@thaqwacarpet3685 I’m Vietnamese…Trust me, I know my customs and cultures more than you would like to believe 😂 And it doesn’t work like what you said… Sorry mate but wedding has a long traditions and customs behind it… You should watch how the groom goes to the bride’s house and picks her up…that will tell you it takes a lot of effort from everyone around and no one has time for the night before to make any plans! Another thing, Uyen is from the north so her family is more strict on wedding than you want to believe otherwise…
@@verumverba5711 of course you're right. I never said that you're wrong. But it does happen. Just video call and voila they came. But like I said only closest family or friends only. Because there are some that piss that they got invited at last minutes.
@@thaqwacarpet3685 Of course how can I be wrong since I’m a Vietnamese that knows my culture and traditions… 😂 Seriously, the only thing that would work for 1 night notice and get a friend at your wedding is when that Vietnamese is eloping 🤫😂
My family would've been like this...
Relative 1: Isn't it _____ wedding today?
Relative 2: is it?
Relative 1: yeah, I think so....
Relative 2: so.... Wanna go?
Relative 1: sure, why not?...
-leaves-
-shows up at the wedding looking like they totally prepared 1 week in advance-
😭💀
Most of the world's population are fuckups
= /
Same situation here
Honestly, without having a plan to attend a wedding or birthday is the best thing you can get as a celebrant. 😂
You expect few visitors and then most of them will show up on your special day.
I think Southeast Asians just love weddings and they don't even have to fancy
Dang. I hope it all works out. We got married for free on the courthouse steps on valentine's day. Just needed the marriage license 72hrs before the ceremony. $35. Got my dress at a thrift shop, $20. 25yrs later and I don't regret not having a huge expensive wedding.
Apparently there is a correlation between keeping costs low and having a long marriage. To make matters difficult there is also a correlation between the number of guests and the length of the marriage.
Remember that correlation is not causation.
@@resourcedragon That's is very interesting! We decided we didn't need to go into debt feeding and boozing everyone. Which, let's be honest. Are there just for the free party. 🤷🏽♀️ They only people at our wedding were my mom and my paternal grandma. We went to Lubys cafeteria to celebrate afterwards. It was perfect. 🫶🏽
You can definitely keep it simple. People make life more expensive and more complicated for themselves. Rings range from 1 dollar to 20k , wine bottles between 10 dollar and 200 dollar. But they all do the same thing ....and are almost unnecessary to start with.
You can do that here in Germany, too.
It's kinda "old school" what she's describing.
Same, I got the marriage license, we got married at a church where I was friends with the priest, we ordered lunch from a local restaurant that delivered, we brewed our own beer and wine, just 35 people and it was great. I got my dress for $35 from a thrift store. We saved our money to buy a house. No regrets at all!
In my hometown the longest distance to travel to a place takes 15 minutes so the wedding invitation comes on the very same day it happens ( usually 4 to 5 hours before is starts) . Since we are a closely packed community , everyone gets an invitation!
Cool! And where is that?
Does nobody work or go to school or have extracurriculars? Lol. Where I live if anyone gets an invitation anywhere last minute nobody is free because they already have other plans or commitments.
Probably an Asian country
My mom once told me that where she is from the school owns the only cemetery next door so that whenever any one died in the area they got a free burial and the whole school showed up.
@@thycauldron it's an inhabitant island of Maldives. The lands are a bit smaller so you basically know everyone in the community!
You don’t have to have a big wedding. You can have a small one. All that matters is that you both are happy with the wedding- it is about the two of you not everyone else. Congrats and wish you both a king and happy marriage ❤
I think it doesn’t work in that way in Vietnam. I’m in relation with Viet man, and as I know we should invite for our marriage all his Vietnamese familly from Vietnam and France. For Vietnamese it’s a union of two families.
Big weddings can be a blast too
Asians weddings are big fat weddings, we spend money like water
Yeah, nowadays it's more common to have the signing with a few people and hold a separate celebration from my experience. Sometimes even multiple small ones depending on how involved you want to get with each social circle.
@@ruru-1993 I'm half Vietnamese and I got married at the county courthouse, only my sister was there.
My cousin had the same problem about all the documents his fiance needed. They ended up getting married in Denmark. It's part of the EU and didn't require anywhere near the paperwork. They then had the reception in Germany.
Same here - we are Canadian living in Germany. The Danish "wedding planer" arranged everything. Denmark is the Las Vegas of weddings.
Me and my ex gf( my now wife) got married there too ..but then after going back to germany we need to register our self there which took 8 months 🥲
I got married at the Copenhagen Opera House to my German husband because it was easier also 😂It was so straightforward and registering the marriage back in Munich was also surprisingly easy!
Same here 😂
Such a life hack. Good to know.
In Finland, we call EVERYBODY by their first name. The boss, teacher, doctor, relatives, friends....
In Finland you call EVERYONE by their first name? Same as in America. I hate that familiarity by strangers or actually by anyone who isn't a close relative or close friend.
That behavior hasn't become common in Europe has it? I've always admired the etiquette and formalness of Europeans.
@@sunshineandwarmth I think it's great, you don't need to worry about people's "statuses" at all! I can't speak for all europe, but at least the nordic countries works this way, and has since (I would guess) the 70tees-ish
@@sunshineandwarmth and we don't have any form of "ms/sir/miss", which I also like. Why would you need to be defined by your marriage status in 2023 😅
@@sunshineandwarmth: Australia is a first name culture. The downside is that if you've been given a difficult or a stupid name, it can make life unpleasant. (I ended up deed-polling my difficult first name - one of the best moves I ever made.)
Most European languages (although I suspect Finnish, Latvian and Hungarian may be different) have both familiar and formal second person pronouns. During the past 50 years the informal pronouns have gone back to being used as singular second person (which is what they were originally) and the formal pronouns are being reserved for use as plurals (or when you really can't get away with using a less formal form).
I have to admit, I was a bit thrown the first time someone who wasn't family addressed me as "tú" in Spanish! (Also a bit thrown by the fact that they were using subject pronouns, the dialect I know generally leaves out the subject pronoun because the verb tells you what it is.)
Now I'm trying to bring back singular second person pronouns into English (properly declined and used with the correct conjugations of verbs, of course).
@@sunshineandwarmthIn the US? We certainly call teachers and doctors by their titles
During Covid time my brother kept on planning his wedding but had to move the date thrice due to multiple lockdowns in India. As my sister in law's family is from Mumbai & we are from South India, restrictions made it harder. Eventually when things opened up, they both decided to get married on the next auspicious date which was in 3 weeks. Our entire family & friends group of 200+ members showed up to the wedding in Mumbai in 3 weeks notice! It was a blast & indeed a great time, everyone pitched in & helped in arranging stuff too.
Do parents or a spiritual leader generally decide on what is an auspicious date? I am Chinese and loosely know there are some special calendars people believe in (my family doesn't) and I think a lot of South Eastern cultures are similar. Does it mean on say an arbitrary suspicious date, (just for example 5/6/2023 this year) a lottt of couples in India will get married -- the courthouse and wedding venues will be packed? Or are there more calculations that customize the wedding date based on the couples birthdates and similar astrological info?
For context I grew up in a hyper modern country and my generation are mostly very eager to eschew any religious-backed logic in life planning. So I never got to see people take those things seriously, which is a pity because I think it's so fascinating how hundreds of generations before us built these traditional constructs to guide others in life before things like science and education came around.
@@p_roduct9211The auspicious date is decided based on the bride & groom's birth charts. It's not a general date that's auspicious for everyone.
@@p_roduct9211 Auspicious dates depend on the horoscope of the bride & groom & are different for different couples. But the priest gives you atleast 7-8 options in the next few months so that you can pick a suitable date ( falling on weekend etc)
@@VK_BeautifulLife interesting! Thank you for the reply.
Bruh. Covid isn't over. Only the counting of cases ended. It's not during covid past tense. It's the ongoing pandemic present tense
As a German I can confirm that a wedding is very expensive and complicated...
Why is that? Is it the wedding license that is expensive? Or the event itself? How much is a license?
I paid 75€ to get married, plus 2x20€ to the Geburtenregisterauszug for me and the Wife. We only married standesamtlich, no Church wedding.
Purely the paperwork only,no fuss, done in 15 minutes at City Hall.
We applied for the license 3 months earlier,my wife got pregnant and it's less of a hassle for tax and parenting reasons if you're married
A wedding is as expensive and as complicated as you make it.
It gets super complicated when a non-German or worse yet a non-EU-citizen is involved because all the necessary paperwork (passport, birth certificate, marriageability certificate, no objection certificate etc) needs to be verified by the German consulate/embassy in the country of origin of the non-German spouse. In many countries, there is no such thing as eg. a 'marriageability certificate' so you need to jump through some extra legal hoops to get something that approximates to it. And the local German consulates/embassies often take their sweet time doing that work. It's a very daunting experience. Both money and time-consuming.
German administrative processes work great if it only involves two people who were born inside the system. The moment foreign papers are involved, it's a nightmare.
@@bremCZ Wedding = unnecessary responsibility, preparation, and money. I probably have a dumb opinion but as I see it it's a waste of money as you're most likely getting divorced anyway.
A tip for wedding planning is that if sth is branded as 'for weddings' it'll be wayyy more expensive because it's generally accepted that weddings are expensive. You can just say that you're preparing an event and you'll get the normal prices.
I’ve seen this “tip” said before but some people pointed out there that its more expensive to do weddings because of the higher expectations that usually come with a wedding. Imagine an event photoshoot vs. a wedding photoshoot. The first one is probably looser with the shots you expect to get and you probably only need to get the main events planned plus you could always call people over for a photo-op, but in a wedding, theres a lot more pressure to get those beautiful candid shots where you only have one chance to capture.
Just be warned that if you do this, dont expect the services to be perfect nor expect them to cater to all your demands if they charge differently for a wedding but you only paid for a normal event.
Also if you do do this, some people who’ve worked in services that were also tricked like this said that they hated the people who do this and I wouldn’t fault them for blacklisting people who do this after that.
@@kristine5582blacklist me all you want
i only need a single marriage
jokes on them😂😂
@@kristine5582ehhh I expect a hundred percent no matter what event it is. Those ppl are just lazy.
What a terrible tip. Being honest with yourself and people around you is definitely better if you're planning a one in a lifetime event like the wedding. It's so disrespectful to the business to lie to them when you don't even know if their pricing for weddings really is different. Just find an honest business and tell them that you'd like to have a budget wedding. Be upfront and have at least the decency to not spread your ignorance around by giving out such terrible tips.
@@divx1001Sounds defensive. You a part of the wedding industry?
Wedding costs vary! A simple wedding (at the Einwohnermeldeamt) cost us only 120€ (if i remember correctly). What makes it expensive is if you have a big party with friends and family, if you have a special venue, expensive (we got ours on etsy for 120€😂) rings aso.
😅
I thought so. People make things more expensive and they complain. For me, a 100 dollar ring looks exactly the same as a 5k ring. A 10 dollar wine tastes exactly the same as a 120 dollar wine. Etc😂
Bruh in India a very average wedding will be 5k dollars. Thats without considering the jewelries and clothing expenses.
@@Huuuuuuuuuuuu107 Damn, thats 4 year salary over there
Yeah, and a divorce starts around 3000-5000 € up. Lol, so having a Rechtschutzversicherung could help.
How do the guests dress at wedding in Vietnam? If they can show up the next they if you call them? Because Mexican women get an appointment at the hairdresser and Make up, plus need a new dress. Men can rent a siut.
Wedding costs are entirely dependent on the people holding the wedding. I've been to fancy, expensive weddings, but I've also been to weddings held in parks, (some with no chairs,) with some takeout, pot luck, or no food, and everybody just happily danced to a playlist on a Bluetooth speaker. Do what you want, be happy, and don't go into debt over it.
Depends on country.
@@lalahana111 There's no way there's a country where full course dinner for multiple guests, a cake sitting in a fancy hall, and a music band for hire are cheaper than gathering some friends and relatives on a plot of grass with some fast food takeout or a grill to make things interesting.
The pot luck wedding is the sort of wedding I would have loved to have.
False. Just the certification here is €200. And that's only if both of you are Irish. If not its €500.
@@irishdancr8 I'm pretty sure that people were just discussing the cost of the ceremony and party, not the paperwork?
I'm so happy for you two!!! I have a small tip: if you rent a room for the wedding area just say you're hosting a party, it's the same room just wayyyy less expensive. Wedding discrimination is real
Oh really. How unfair. But thanks for the tip
So true, ordered 3 plain white cakes, but didn't say it was for a wedding, the bakery found out it was for a wedding and tripled the price, for the same darned cakes.
Or tell them it's an engagement party that's cheap like a birthday, but then you arrive and be like it's a surprise wedding! A friend did that for her 30th and the cake venue and food was cheaper as a birthday than if she had told them it was a surprise wedding.
Maybe you already know- but many of my friends who were Germans marrying internationals, come to Denmark (Copenhagen) for the wedding registration. It is a very simple process here. Then they go back and do a party back in Germany😊. Good luck!
My husband is german but we both live in Denmark. They offered for us to make it more simpler and do in DK, however, to pay for 65 peoples accommodation in Denmark would have been way too expensive. I only needed like 2 papers more for Germany, so it‘s not as complicated there either.
thats what i was about to say :)
How much international?! Even for a Vietnamese with a EU person?
That was a good option up to 2021 or so, but not anymore afaik.
Oops just commented this as well. But we did this and it is waaaayyy easier. Also you get to have vacation in Denmark. An absolute bonus. We also visited the Lego House in Billund, where Lego was invented. Great fun.
the heartstopper art on the wall!! 🥺❤️
OMG I WAS FRIKIN LOOKINGV FOR THIS COMMENT 😂
Legit question: heartstopper art? Is that the name of it or a way to say that you really like it or...?
@@queenesreina7424It's art based on a series of graphic novels called hartstopper!
YES I WAS LOOKING FOR THIS
"In Vietnam we can call them the night before the wedding and they show up" was so wholesome out of nowhere lmao they gotchu ❤
We did this with some of my guest during my sister wedding and they came too😂
Tbf if there was any way humanly possible and someone i liked asked me to come to their wedding, im 100% making a way@@Kk-rc5dl
wow seriously a year?😂
you're right, here in Indo we can also invite guests anytime we want, even friends would come anyway without invitations just for foods and messing around with the couple😁
by the way congratulations
A few months in advance are usually enough. My sister is getting married in June and invitations came at the end of February.
Some people do a year but I personally think that is too long.
I think it's the general concept in Europe. I'm inviting my guests 6 months before
also the invitation card is sent around two weeks before the wedding. unless they are family, kita udah tau duluan kapan nikahnya
I have been to several weddings in Germany and none of those invited the guests a whole years prior to the actual event. Most couples will invite the guests about 6 months prior though. The main reason for this is that a wedding in germany usually is a whole day event with partying at night. So the couple wants to make sure that all of their loved ones can make time to spend their special day with them. Also, other than in a lot of Asian countries, guests often don't simply give money to the married couple but also prepare special gifts for the couple, they prepare speeches and often organize fun games that will be played at the wedding day. So yeah by inviting guests early everyone can make sure to have time on that special day and if they are close to the couple they also have time to prepare some special memorable gifts.
Hai...
You're such an enrichment for germany
😂😂😂😂😂
It's really nothing against you but i can't stand immigrants being primarly valued as enrichment or loss to europeans.
I mean she's cute and all but how is she an enrichment for the country? Like seriously lmao
That's so badass to be able to call people the day before and be like "we doing this, come at 2pm!" and people show up.
And guess what, my family will arrive at 8 am
I think the most insane part is calling your spouse 's parents by their names 😂 in India we can't even call any middle aged man/woman by their names..we have to address them atleast uncle nd aunty 😍
If we did that in Germany the least we would get is a weird look or a scolding.
It's like rude to call someone not related to you uncle or aunt. It either is seen as impolite or rude as you just called them old.
And calling someone grandpa/grandma is an actual insult here if the person is not your actual grandpa or someone close.
@@xman7695 wow that so different from my country... Calling someone not uncle or aunty or grandpa or grandma even though they are strangers are rude... Calling them uncle/aunty is like respect to us, respect to the one older than you and even of they are just a year or two older we have honorifics for that too. Calling by name of someone who is older than you is straight up rude.. You only call people by name if you are the same age or they are younger than you. Honorifics are very important to us.. We are so opposite.
@@euchiii3596 in German, we just use different pronouns for people we are close with and people we don't know and adress more formally. Words like auntie would imply much more closeness to strangers than we actually feel and would feel wrong for us because of that. But by using the "formal you" instead of the "informal you" we might have a different but still comparable way of showing respect to people because especially elders (that are not family) are adressed formally until they ask you to switch to the "informal you" 😅 hope that explaination makes sense
We also adress strangers and people we are not familiar with (that includes collegues depending on the work environment) with their last name, friends with their first name and the closest family with their title. My actual uncle, aunt, grandma and grandpa would feel very weird if I didn't call them by that title as well. I think they would feel disrespected then. We just don't use these titles apart from our family. For family members like in laws and step parents, it depends more on personal preference. If I consider my step mom more of a real mom, I call her mom, if I don't, I call her by her first name. Its the same for the mother in law. But as we get to know them so late in our lives, most of us rather use their first name than calling them mom.
@@c.m.8972 Yes, of course... I understand 😊😊 we have very different cultures and have different way of expressing it. What shocking to me most are the people in the West who calls their parents by their names, if that ever happen in my culture, the slipper, wooden spoon or broom will be waiting for you or worst be disowned. 😂
My cousin (Australian) and his now wife (Irish) were the same. They lived in Australia but we're getting married in Ireland (where weddings are also ridiculously expensive.) They ended up having a three year engagement in order to be able to save as much money as possible, and the advanced notice also meant that those of us coming from Australia/overseas would have time to save for the travel as well.
Weddings are expensive in Australia too.. don't get ne wrong some people opt for a beach/park free public venue abd then a BBQ and piss up vut that is not a common Aussie wedding
i feel like thats part of the reason for the advanced notice now, is just that the planning can take so long with finding an available venue (or finding and open date if you wanna have it in a particular place) etc, and saving to reserve everything-
I@@samanthacook6803it should be. If I ever have a wedding it will literally be the two witnesses and the celebrant on a beach and like a super fancy dinner or something for just a few people.
@@samanthacook6803 my uncle and aunt threw a surprise wedding at their sons first birthday party (byo picnic in the park) 😅 halfway through they were like so yeah we're just gonna get married now since you're all here already 😂 it was a great super affordable option. They just celebrate their wedding anniversary on a different day.
@@XxMCRroxnonstopxX that is awesome! That is something I would definitely do.
My region of Germany is notoriously traditional and my home town may as well be stuck in the 1800s, so I can relate to a lot of these 😭 my dad calls my mum’s parents mum and dad and you usually invite wedding guests like two days before hand, mainly because we often just wear tracht or nice clothing to weddings so no one needs to go out and buy anything. Further more weddings are always in churches and it’s pretty much free to rent the local church so the wedding ends up being very inexpensive 😅
which region is that?
Every rural area.
@@fangirlinneverland6335 I come from a region in Hesse, I won’t say exactly because it would literally give away my location because the region name is the same as the town but I’m from Hesse
@@Foatizenknechtl yeah lmao, pretty much anywhere in Germany that is rural or traditional operates like this
@@Zenaidafromthemoon I'm from Germany too but not really from a rural area so I had no idea that you would actually invite the guests only 2 days before the wedding!
IS THAT A HEARTSTOPPER POSTER IN THE BACKGROUND???.
I love that the Vietnamese aspect sounds like ' I say party they say- already here'
Lol yes
Congratulations to both of you. Love from India ❤️.
Congratulations to them!
Love from MCGI💕🥰
In Cameroon(Africa) we do not need invitations. we just show up uninvited on the day of the wedding, we eat, drink and make sure we have takeaways. I love Africa🌍
Haha! That's fun.
😂
I hope I may visit ya'll some day in your places 👰
That’s what I’m talking about!
@Maja Anytime. I live in the USA, but it has never felt like home. I am looking forward to returning soon.
You two are gonna be the most cutest little married couple ever❤🎉
I saw a RUclips video about a Japanese wedding. It was brilliant. The couple went to a government office, took a queue number and managed to submit some papers to a civil servant who disappeared somewhere. Eventually he came back and said nothing. The couple got a bit confused and asked the civil servant: "Are we married?" The civil servant replied: "Yes, you are."
The whole situation was fantastic. I don't want to get married in this life. However, if I need to go through that traumatising experience, I demand a Japanese urban wedding. During those you don't even find out if you are married unless you ask the civil servant. It is so relaxing. A superior way of doing things.
My wedding went down similarly here in Germany. It was on a Monday at 9am, we went to the local government office and were married in 15 minutes. Then we went to work 😅
We didn't want the stress of planning an expensive party for people who don't really care just to please our parents. We blamed it on.covid but honestly we always wanted it that way.
Was that Paolo?
@@rrr441 Brilliant. And great strategy blaming it on Covid. But I think in Germany the civil servant tells you that you are now married? And there is a minimalist ceremony/routine? The Japanese version was like renewing your passport. Or even less than that.
@@LLNTMY Yes!!!
I think they went to have a meal later. But the wedding was awesome. Especially the part of not finding out if you are married unless you ask.
I can imagine some people going through that process and NOT ASKING anything.
A few days later someone wants to know if they are married. The answer:
"Er...it is possible."
p.s. I think they are a tiny bit rebels. The woman is Japanese and the man is not. I don't think it is viewed well in Japan? They also had a baby. With an epidural! That is not common in Japan and there are very few clinics that offer it 24/7. I can imagine a European woman giving birth in Japan. European: "I'd like an epidural." Japanese doctor: "Hahahahaaaa... Dream on, oh noble patient! In Japan real mothers suffer pain. Please be kind and suffer pain. What kind of tea can I offer you?"
That’s the registration of the marriage. Usually they might have a ceremony later on at a hotel or restaurant.
The wedding itself is purely for indulgence. All you need is to sign the certificate at the Standesamt. Done in an hour.
Yep. That's what my mom did for her 2nd marriage. Got there, just the 2 of them, no guests, done in 30mins.
Do they have to 'stand' there for an hour.
Yeah same thing with the guests. The more guests (particularly if they're not your immediate friends and family) you have the more notice you give so they can properly plan around your event.
If it's immediate family, well calling them up the night before might ruffle some feathers, but just dropping "hey so we're thinking about getting married on Saturday two weeks for now, anyone wanna tag along?" to your immediate friends and family _could_ work out.
If you're like me and don't have friends or family, it's even easier!
@@Straightastheycome "Stand" doesn't mean "stand" in the name of the office, but "status". Some changes in the official register are done by this office.
Yeah but doesn't stop someone from wanting it. I'd council my kids not to go crazy: it's just a party surrounded by a 5 minute ceremony ... but... yeah maybe it's good God doesn't make me rich. I'd do fireworks for my girls if I had Elon Musk $$$$.
I think this is because in the West, like Germany, if somebody RSVPs a "yes" - it is a hard YES. Here in the US, people plan extremely small details including seating arrangements or food menu based on who is coming or not coming. So, guests also conversely want prior notification so they can block their calendars for a guaranteed attendance.
In many Asian countries, it is more fluid. You invite a lot of people - like 5000 - some show up, some don't, but there won't be any planning changes because someone didn't show up or someone unexpected showed up. You couldn't find a seat? Well, stand and eat. Are you allergic to things? Bring food from home then. It is more like a public event - where you are responsible for yourself.
i love the heart stopper poster in the background 🥹🥹
We did our civil wedding in Denmark to avoid the red tape in Germany. The location was super nice (definitely better than our city's courthouse). We invited our closest family members and friends to Denmark and spent the weekend there.
I’m curious, what’s the 'red tape'?
@@lauraj0205 In our case the proof of eligibility for marriage for my husband. The process of proving his eligibility would have been long and tedious as it involves different authorities in Germany and abroad (e.g. local foreign office, embassy, local court). Denmark does not require a proof of eligibility. Generally the process of getting married is much faster in Denmark. You can get married within four weeks of starting the process/formalities even as a non-national.
@@julezhu1893 For some reason, this step is more annoying than it needs to be. We had the most simple case (2 EU nationals, no prior marriage, no children, no divorce) but it still took a while. Travelling wasn't an option for us.
@@intrepidtomato So you went through the process in Germany? Did you need a "Ledigkeitsbescheinigung" and if so how did you get it?
@@julezhu1893 You have to prove that you're not already married?? Is that what that certificate is? It makes me wonder what previous events caused there to be such a certificate.
One of the best weddings i have ever been to was hosted by the groom's mother in her front yard and backyard. Guests could camp out and sleep in a tent. They ordered a moving fridge for the beer and drinks. And food was bring a dish by all the guests. Entertainment wise, the bride had bought loads temporary tattoos, there was a guitar standing around and then there were children and Seifenblasen. And it was a whole weekend! The bride and groom were super chilled, didn't sweat the small stuff, nothing fancy. Just a bunch of people having a nice time :)
That's awesome
Das klingt echt schön :)
It's gonna go from German boyfriend to German husband now hehe.
Lots of love to you guys ⚘
They have already reached the German fiancé phase.
I am German and our engagement was just 6 months before the actual wedding so all of our guests where invited like 4 1/2 months before our wedding. I hate getting invitations a year in advance. I dont even know what to eat tonight so I have no clue if I want to go to a wedding in 12 months 😱
I always wished you guys to be married, from what we see, you guys are perfect for each other! Congratulations!
The true Vietnamese wedding experience: ppl u dont even know showing up
I would love that, German weddings are so boring
Vietnamese weddings sound like Egyptian weddings! 💖 Congratulations. I'm so happy for you.
"Ah Ya Albi" by Hakim plays at ear-drum shattering volume.
OMG is it heart stopper in the background?!😍😍😍
Awww congrats!! Yall are the most wholesome couple on RUclips ❤️
As a Chinese/Hongkonger, it is quite impossible to invite someone to a Chinese wedding just one night before. (While a western one, it is possible). As you have to prepare tables and foods for them. So at least several months in advance.
Many people merry abroad and just have the marriage recognized in Germany... you may want to look into that because it may be more efficient... you can always have a big party with friends and family when you are back... since you already have a residency permit, there will be no issue returning to Germany...
Also the wedding itself will just be an admin fee at city hall.. what is expensive is the party, the dress, etc. and of course if you are not a citizen you need to submit a zillion docs in certified translation 😉
Why are you people so patronizing? she clearly knows what to do and is expressing HER opinion on it. Get tougher skin or stop watching I recommend 😉
@A plus you clearly have no idea of all the bureaucracy involved in marrying in Germany as a foreigner and the paperwork you need to supply with certified translation.. it is a hassle which is why many people indeed marry abroad and my sister is eternally engaged... a colleague did it in the Caribbean and had a nice honeymoon to boot and then had a party with friends when backbin Germany as they were both non-citizens ... there is nothing patronizing about the suggestion ... something to consider unless they are set on marrying here for whatever reason... and heck it is their party and they can do it any which way they want ...
i am LIVING with the Heartstopper's HI framed IN THE BACH 😭😍
A hearty congratulations to you...
I am no where near marraige age but as I am seeing my Mom struggle alot with her husband and his family even after 19yrs of marraige...I have always hoped nobody struggle like that...Have a Happy life from me and my Mom... we are a big fan of yours and wish you the best!!!
"Imperfections makes things Perfect"!!!
❤❤❤
Congrats girl, hope everything turns out well for you guys ^^
I'm also very happy to have a Chinese friend since she knows how to show up spontaneously. My old friends from Germany are all so "busy". I don't like to make endless time advance appointments with them so we don't meet. 😂
You don't think it's unreasonable to expect your friends to be available all the time despite having their own lives and responsibilities?
So, how do Asians manage to just be free that night? Do they not have hobbies?
@@TheFren wedding is important so unless it’s a life and death situation OR work related or vacation related, then we go. Other commitments can be rearranged
@@AT-lp8qgin most European countries it's seen badly to cancel a commitment because something else came up
@@Serena-or7sl It's a wedding not a game of Tennis. Europeans need to not take themselves so seriously. No one is going to be offended if it can be rearranged quickly, especially if it's just a chat over cake and coffee.
I've noticed Germany is very similar to the US in this way. Its cool hearing comparisons with Vietnam. And my goodness, they'd just come so soon! Love you videos, Happy wedding planning!
Usually you send out invitations about 5 weeks in advance of the wedding in the US, not a year. Weddings can be as cheap or as expensive as you want and all you have to have is a marriage license, so no it really not like Germany at all in the US. Thank God.
@@dalemoore8582 I know, I live in the US. You technically don't even need to get married on paper for a wedding (my parents did this for college purposes). To me it seems kinda similar, my parents sent out invitations at least a year in advance due to travel since my family is well spread out throughout the US.
My husband and I got married at home with only the people we wanted there. It was really special ❤️
Edit: I'm American and my in-laws are Bulgarian, husband was a citizen. Neither side was happy, but we literally didn't care... The date and taxes were more important. We also told people not to send us money or gifts 😁 Weddings in the SF Bay Area cost $20k-$40k+. We saved for a home instead.
Edit: No, y'all. I got MARRIED at home, in my living room, with 15 witnesses, in California. It was a Wednesday: 12/12/12, why would we throw a big wedding on a Wednesday? We had more people over the following Saturday from out of town. Did we SAY we'd have a "big wedding" in a year? Yes. Did we? No...
Again, we put a down payment on a house for a 1-year anniversary instead.
The the US, Marriage licenses are just picked up at the county office and as long as you are officiated in that county it's perfectly legal.
All of my family members who were forced to be married in weddings with like 2000 plus people envy you so much lol
At home in Germany? Never.
@@CapHH Maybe in Lockdown-Times?
@@JuleSan_jk nope. Definitely not. It's not allowed.
@@CapHH i think you missunderstood, bet she meant she married in the "standesamt" but had the wedding party at home. I was also participating in such a wedding.
Im so happy for you guys. Have a good life.
Congratulations sis!!
May god bless you both 💖
In Pakistan we invite people to our wedding at least 2 to 3 weeks earlier.
If you invite them 1 day before wedding they will not come to wedding even they will near to your home .
They think the wedding don't need them .
I want to marry.
German: Time to invite the guests.
Vietnamese : Time to order my papers.
Sounds like the same to me.
I might be misunderstanding your comment but if I got you correctly, if she were getting married to a vietnamese in Vietnam, i don't think she would need all those papers. I think she only needs those papers because of German legal requirements.
@@fejiroohanomah7453 No, you understood correctly, but I sometimes forget that my irony and sarcasm does not translate well in writing. Of course it is because she is living in Germany, but one year waiting because the Vietnamese bureaucracy, is the same like inviting Germans: the weeding will be in a year.
How do I know that it is the Vietnamese bureaucracy. Friend of mine married someone from Iran and it took them also a year, and another friend of mine married in Australia and that took a few weeks for the papers.
@@fejiroohanomah7453 And the part that you have to invite Germans a year prior to the wedding is exaggerated, usually 2-3 month, exceptions can happen especially when you want to marry during summertime when many people are on vacation.
@@Vajshan ohhhhhh..... now I understand your comment perfectly. Thank you for clarifying even though you didn't need to. I can relate to the bureaucracy part because in my country, lots of official documentation take too long for the same reason.
Congratulations and good luck!🤞 We had our wedding last year in Prague and when we started looking for places they were booked 2 years in advance! 😂 I didnt even know my husband back then 😂😂😂
Omg imagine getting ready for bed and someone calling you like "hey in getting married tomorrow, you coming?"
why ? getting married is very easy. You just pay for the license and sign the marriage certificate. Takes 15 minutes and $50 to get married.
@@anastasia10017 getting married isn't easy in every country
Why not?
I mean, a normal guests would only need to put on a nice clothes and just went over to eat, drink, and congratulate the couples.
No difference than "Hey, I crave some burger, wanna dine in our usual restaurant tomorrow?"
@@bluesapphire4262 In some countries especially if you are a close relative you should also bring a gift which is like a gold jewelry, or house item(this is after the wedding day) and it also requires money for guest to attend to a wedding that's why the owners of wedding are able to hold a huge wedding includes lots of relatives it's kind of paying-repaying process and whatever you bought as a gift is returning to you in your wedding like if you have bought a golden bracelet for your cousin that cousin needs to buy a similar value gift and I don't know the logic behind tbh but that's the tradition. Oh and you should be helping to owner's by going to their houses helping them with the food and other stuff at their house right before wedding starts because the bride first comes to her house and say goodbye to her parents and you should be saying good bye to her and if you are groomside then it's the same foods are made etc then you should go to bride house with groom greet her etc some dances and you should be there for them it's also lots of effort..
@@bluesapphire4262 a normal guest would have to prepare gifts (personal not monetary usually) get the day off and maybe even the next day if the party goes after midnight and if it's further away you need travel and accomodation
DO I SEE THE HEARTSTOPPER "Hi"
THINGS ON THE WALL BEHIND YOU?
Weddings in Germany aren't more expensive than anywhere else in the world. You could simply go to registry office and sign the paper and would be legally married, just like in other countries. However if you want to celebrate with a big party, invite dozens of people, have a big buffet, expensive wedding venue etc. then of course it will be very expensive. But big wedding parties will also be expensive in all other countries. Long story short: my point is that a wedding is always just as expensive as you want it to be, in Germany as well as everywhere else 😊
Yes because goods and services cost exactly the same everywhere in the world.
@@danidejaneiro8378 Of course it doesn't cost the EXACT SAME amount of money everywhere, Genius 🙈 But a simple marriage registry at the registry office is pretty cheap everywhere around the world. For Germany it's 40 Euro if the couple both have German citizenship and 80 Euro if at least one of them is a foreigner. Considering the average income for a regular German household that's still pretty cheap. Planning a big wedding can easily get really expensive and planning the same kind of wedding in a different country might be cheaper price wise but also in those countries the families usually have a smaller average income per year. So you have to set costs and income for each country individually into relation. Fancy weddings in South East Asia can be just as expensive as fancy weddings in Europe. So my statement still stands. You can have a cheap wedding or an expensive wedding anywhere around the world.
Actually, that's not even possible everywhere in Australia! In many areas in Australia, you can't get married at town hall/registry office, you need to organise a celebrant.
And the cheapest wedding you can do is still over 300$, even if you are allowed to marry at the registry office. It's such a rip off.
@Camille I think $350 sounds okay for what you get, a celebrant who can provide witnesses, the Lodgement of Notice of Intended Marriage submitted 1 month before the marriage so the Department of Births, Deaths and Marriages can check your aren't already married or trying to commit fraud.
Registry Marriage Ceremony Fee to cover admin costs at the registry office and a Commonwealth Certified Marriage Certificate to change your name on your ID, etc, after.
They can make you free copies they can notarise so you can post them off to change your superannuation and phone bill etc since some places won't accept a photo of the original.
If you need a celebrant because there's no registry, then it costs about $420 incl tax and has all the above things too.
I'm American and my husband is British, we got married in the states. The amount of paperwork, costs, and insanity is insane.
And I would do it all over again for him
Oh yeah me and my husband (both Americans) got married in Las Vegas. The amount of paperwork alone was crazy. Had we both been Catholic (he is, I am not) we would have been REQUIRED to take at least six weeks of Marriage Classes. His father tried to tell me I HAD to convert after the wedding. My husband and I both told him to shut up and that I am NOT converting.
Which America are you from?
I would assume people on either America continent are going to vary.
@@thisistheaccountname I like your username
Congrats 🥺🥺🥺🤍🤍🤍so happy for u two!
It’s so good to hear your entire tale of moving to Germany , getting Germanised , finding the love of your life and then getting married to him. It’s amazing , congratulations you two
Congratulations!! Endless happiness to the both of you 💕😊
Well, if you would marry in Vietnam, he would be the one to bring in the 500 documents
I don’t think so, other countries are not as strict as Germany, Denmark for example. Many germans who marry non-germans do so in Denmark when it‘s impossible for them to obtain all the necessary documents, for example when the person can‘t go back to their country to get the documents, so they are forced to go to Denmark. It‘s quite bitter and I am sad that we make it so hard for people to get married
Nah, the goverment would not care much. Passport, health check document, and most importantly his marriage status certificate.
2nd and third world countries dont care as much about citizen-immigrant marriages. in fact, they encourage it.
@@domdomtran so cant they go marry in Vietnam instead? Do a wedding with allll theeeee folkssss and beeee happierrr?
Yeah and then have a party in Germany for the German relatives. You could even do a ceremony at the party, but it wouldn't have to be a legal ceremony, just file the paperwork from your Vietnamese wedding.
A wedding really isn't very expensive. It really depends on what you plan/want.
My friend just spent EUR 500 for her wedding, and it could have been even less, but she had some special wishes.
Good luck with your wedding!
do i see.. HEARTSTOPPER IN THE BACKGROUND?! ASGDASGDHFJK THIS CANT JUST BE ME
YOO I NEVER EVEN CAUGHT ON THAT WAS HEARTSTOPPER
I’m South African and just got married to my German husband and I feel this in my soul 😂
A wedding is only expensive when you make it expensive.
From above comments, it seems like because she's a foreigner, there's alot more things they need to do before getting married. Not necessary expensive for the ceremony itself.
@@sleepyearth No more than 100€.
Honestly, it's the difference in their culture. Asians are close-knit big families especially for those in rural areas.
According to what I read, some asian weddings can invite 300-500 guests at the same price for Germany's 50 guests.
@@notmyname3556 True. Also if you invite the entire neighborhood or village, they would call come over and help out. Westerners, for some reason think that's weird.
@@lylelaney8270 Not really Westerners, just city folk. Some of my German friends from rural areas have a similar close-knit community in their villages, but most people nowadays live in larger towns and cities where there is no such sense of community.
Can confirm - I was once invited to a Vietnamese wedding, literally the day before. Were like 400+ people there.
Some rural places in the Philippines they just anounce it, PA system style. Each small village (called barangay) has a PA system used to announce stuff like weddings, social gatherings, funerals and other such announcements.
Same here in Indonesia we invite people at least 1 or 2 weeks before the wedding. But if we invite them 1 day before, they also will show up at the wedding.😊
_Where_ do your guests come from? Are they people who live in your neighbourhood, or are they from the other side of the country?
It's become increasingly common in the west for a lot of wedding guests to be from hundreds, even thousands of miles away, which is why they need so long to prepare.
@@resourcedragonYou don't need a year. Do your wedding guests travel on donkeys?
@@vivida7160because a lot of us works in big cities like Jakarta, Surabaya, or Bandung. Or even different island 😅 you cant just calling them a night before the wedding. That's different story with your neighbors. Yes they gonna show up. They married in front their house not in building or a hotel. 😂😂😂
Girl, someone calls me the night before their wedding you best believe I’m showing up! I love seeing others happy and food + dancing?! Helllll yeah
You could just get married at the courthouse, then have a small dinner party.
In Germany, you have a list to pick from where you wanna get married and it’s free because it’s through the state. Your marriage only counts if it’s officiated by a government official. I got married in a medieval church for free.
Exactly. Many people do this and then get a big wedding later on if they like
The expensive stuff and the headaches are the 500 documents for the marriage.
Many cultures wouldn't allow for that. If someone did that in my culture they'd be ostracised by our community.
@mariakhan7986 I know what you mean, my wifes family is vietnamese christians. Her brother married a vietnamese wife at the courthouse here in Denmark for practical reasons, but the family dont rally consider it worth much. They will have a big christian wedding in Vietnam later. But sometimes you have to go with practicalities
Idk how I stumbled upon this page but I have literally fallen in love with y’all’s journey. From way over here in the western hemisphere in North Carolina ❤
Haha I feel the part about 'invitations one Year in advance' 😂 we thought six months were more than enough. Ten months in advance our relatives would start to ask 'when do you finally send out the invitations?!?!'
Same! It does work if you mostly consider your family's needs and then see whoever of your friends can make it (as it turns out, most of them).
It's the same in documents and visas for me as a Canadian trying to marry my Scottish fiance. The amount of money I need and documents I need to do is through the roof. And there's a chance where they could reject the documents and I'd have to do it all over again. It's anxiety inducing.
If you think a wedding is expensive in Germany you don't want to know the cost of a divorce.
Based!!!!!! 🤍
Not an issue if you don't divorce
Is it biased like in America?
Congratulations you both! Must admit that you shorts are oberwhelmingly funny, looking forward for whats to come!
a year, I remember my friend calling an evening saying "Hey macha tomorrow is my wedding, dont worry its in bangalore itself" and I went 😐
Yes Asia may be lesser to the West in terms of materialism. But our culture and society fabric is better than the West
@@KennethGangte Please explain to me why this is better. I find it quite shameful not to invite people that I respect and like in time so they can prepare. If I had to be at a wedding at a few hours' notice, I would most probably have to cancel another appointment at very short notice, and that is just rude and hurtful to the person I would have to do that to in order to attend the wedding. So why does this mean your social fabric is better than ours?
@@KennethGangte There's not a single country in the world more obsessed with materialism than China. Tell me again how that is a Western thing, please.
So happy for you!!! Been watching this woman and seen most of her shorts, I really admire her!!!
Congratulations Unie!!! 🥹🥰😘💜🫶
You don't always have to invite people a year early but it's handy because that way they can plan their vacation days accordingly. But at least a few months early is better
I’m proud of you for putting yourself out there the first video!
I know ur a great person and are making a difference with other women who have similar culture issues, it’s not for nothing
Congrats on the marriage and stay true (morally)to that first girl who posted!
Much love from the west!
You can also just formally wed in Germany. Arrive at the registry office. Pay 60€ and tadah! you are now married. (For you it would be about 120€ though)
I got invited to my friend's wedding the same day at 7am while on my way home from work. Arrived at the church and became the coin bearer. A wedding I will never forget. 🤣🤣🤣
Lol just imagine wearing the same clothes you wore from work and suddenly you're a coin bearer at a wedding! Please don't tell me that's what happened I- 😆
@@rosaaan No, I was able to go back home and change. I finished work at 7 and the wedding was around 9 or 10 so I was able to change. Would have been funny if I was in work clothes.
CONGRATS TO YOU
Congratulations! Wish you a world of happiness and joy.
My ideal wedding would be me, my wife-to-be, the officiant and the required number of witnesses!
And you still can't even find a real girl other than those e-girls that you SIMP hard and paying using your parent's credit cards and of course your own left hand. 😊
@@kanalkosongAre you ok ?
It was almost the same for my husband and me. We got married in Germany, but we both are from different countries. He is American and I am from Croatia. We both needed 500 documents each, it took us almost a year and half to get everything ready and finally get married. Plus afterwards we had to finish 500 documents. It was a CRAZY ride. 😂❤
It’s simple never EVER tell any vendor you are planning for a wedding. That’s what jacks prices up. Just say it’s a really big get together with family. Wedding just lets vendors know that they can increase prices more than it needs to be… unless it’s something custom. Then the price is usually worth it
Congratulations! I’m so happy y’all are getting married. Every blessing to you. ❤
“I can call them the night before the wedding and they show up” 😂 so true
Same thing in Poland. Weddings usually take place in holiday period (June to September) and if you won’t send invitations a year in advance people might book holidays and they will end up either having to postpone the trip or they won’t show up. It’s not because we don’t care enough to show up with short notice but rather because we want to respect everybody’s plans and time
Edit: Also people like to get hair and makeup appointments before weddings and in period with lots of weddings it’s not easy to book appointment few days before. It’s all about respecting people’s time
Yeah, some commenters mentioned people not being family oriented enough in europe but to me it's a matter of respect as you said. If it's an emergency then I can drop everything but if you don't value me or my time by telling me in advance then you must not be very interested in having me there...
First of all, congratulations. But you don't need to do all that. I got married with 15 guests at a registry office in Germany and it wasn't expensive at all.
IS THAT THE HEARTSTOPPER PICTURE ON WALL? 😍🤣🤣