I was my older brother's best man, and during my speech I had the thought, "What would happen if I said he molested me when we were younger?" It would've been a total lie, but I had the utter attention of well over 200 people, and I had the potential to ruin the entire event (not to mention my brother's reputation) for everyone with just a few choice words. I just enjoyed the potential power of changing the entire atmosphere of the situation at my own will. Everyone has that power, it just takes a psycho to follow through with it.
@@Ted_Sheckler Why is it a terrible story? I used to think I was a rare breed for having random and disturbing thoughts like that pop in my head. It's from reading and listening to so called "terrible stories" like that that I've come to realize it's more common than I thought. Those of us capable of controlling our worst impulses are just civilized beasts.
My ex girlfriend decided to ruin my brothers wedding day. At the reception she was getting drunk. She was only 20 years old and she went up to multiple people telling them that she was drinking for 2, knowing full well people would realize she was talking about me as I had just become sober after a DWI. Then she went up and told my 78 year old Catholic grandmother that I just asked her to marry me, my girlfriend was a Jew and my grandmother didn't approve of me leaving the catholic faith. Then told her that she was pregnant and then slammed 3 shots in front of her. She walked away and my grandmother fainted. My brother told me I need to leave with her because she had just went up in stage and told the whole party I had just proposed to her. I had to take her home but in the way she woke up from her drunken stupor and blew me all the way home and then we had sex in the car in front of the neighbors. I broke up with her. She was way too hot for me and at the time I didn't know how to handle her, especially with my low self esteemed and self worth. I blame myself for her actions because I didn't know how to man up. 10 years later she still hits me up and when I reject her she calls me a pussy and pathetic little man, like she used too. Now I just laugh at her and she asks why I couldn't have beg a real man when I was with her. She's just mad because I make 6 figures and my fiancee now gets to sit in her fat ass all night doing nothing.
"Faaaaaawk yeah, maaaaaan... I'll smash that shit, no problem. No fawkin' problem, man, no problem. Somebody get me something so I can break it YEAH... SOMEBODY GET SOMETHING TO BREAK... oh sorry, guys, I was just feelin' the moment (sniff)"
In HS the lazy teacher would turn on those old projectors that they would roll and place it in the middle of the aisle. Then turn off the light, stand in the hallway and crack the door. It was right there beside me and I said WTF, so I kicked it thinking it would roll. Instead the plug which could have held up a tank, did not pop out of the wall and instead the projector fell onto the floor smashing it. Lights turn on and here I am with my fucking leg stretched out both in horror and amazement. That event got brought up 10-15 yrs later during background checks and psy evaluations for certain positions.
I sometimes have a dream where I see myself standing in sort of sun-god robes on a pyramid with a thousand naked women screaming and throwing little pickles at me.
i did it once to my friend i thought "what if i just karate chopped his neck would he get knocked out?" i did it and he started crying asking me why i did that and i literally just stood there and wondered why did i do that to him...
I wanted to see how well I could throw a football so I threw it at my friend 30 yards away when he wasn’t looking and it drilled him in the face. I said I thought he would catch it and he said no I didn’t. He was right
In college we were at a sports bar talking about this kind of thing. On a dare I stood up emptied an entire pepper shaker on my head and yelled “I AM THE PEPPER MAN HEAR ME ROAR!!!” the worst thing is people barely looked up, and I was so embarrassed I had to leave and none of my friends would come with me.
Damn shows without Opie in the latter xm/serious years were loose, fluid, hilarious shows with honest, funny as F conversations that were organic. I've laughed the entire 28 minute clip.
I’ve heard the reason we do this is, similarly to everything else, evolutionary. We learn from mistakes, we work hard to make our situation better when it’s bad. Conversely, when things are good you just assume it will keep going. Our brains are evolved to a point where we don’t have to experience something to learn, we can imagine it. It’s good for us to think of the worst in a given situation so we are prepared. So we don’t do it basically.
I think about that stuff all the time. And it's almost never out of anger or anything. I'm just legitimately crazy. I think my mind just naturally goes to the worst things I could possibly do...or at least it goes to the last things that I'd actually WANT to do, if that makes any sense.
Oh my Jesus, that was fucking funny. To me, the best part is that they basically held a mirror up to their own fanbase, in the process. They were, more or less, describing a year-round Jocktober that involved very close to home situations, turned up past 11.
Its BECAUSE of this video that sometimes I get terrified in public situations that I'm going to do something and not realize it until after I have done it lol!! I never thought about that shit until I heard this. Like I do the cop's gun thing in the check out line and stuff. Or I think about the "veering into oncoming traffic" thing. But I never thought about the whole "screwing up my job" thing 😂😂😂
Sam, Anthony and Jim are truly what should have been . Sam is funnier than opie but not pushy with it and definitely knows when to let funnier people run with things
@@impalapoppa4414 No, that's literally what its called. A phenomenon when people have those kinds of thoughts. That was the name given to it. Patrice might have said it, but he didnt come up with that.
I get those unspeakably stupid and downright mean things that I could do play in my head, knowing good and god damn well that they would change my life in an exceptionally dramatic way. Then, I realize how stupid it would be to actually do them.
Opie would've drove this right in the ditch. You ever uhh try to uhh do uhh uhh uhh uh idk a uhh, then somebody saves him. Opie: yehesss! Exactly you ever think of doing that?
I've had these my whole life. Just thinking about how there is nothing stopping me from just randomly walking up to my boss and making a long drawn out noise while twitching my arms around, imagining the moment after it stops being worse than actually doing it and how I would never be able to undo it. What type of crazy people are we to think this kind of stuff?
"I have this fantasy about getting drunk in my 60's and then assaulting the daughter of a comedy club owner. Even after that happening I refuse to change my lifestyle in any way".
Michael M. If you listen to a bunch of the O&A's Louis was on you realise the germ of ideas for a lot of his bits were from the show. The Boston 'retahded' bit was a woman calling in and the boys making her say the word over and over. "Maybe he's what miss? Your phone is breaking up." "Maybe he's re-tah-ded."
@@morganyu3838 I'm from Boston and my aunt worked at Paul A Dever School for the Retarded. She would bring these people home sometimes. Ritahded meant something different to me than most people. It was actually quite scary sometimes. Whenever I hear Louis' bit, I think of those days and how ritahded those people were. Some were very much like Louis... just masturbating furiously in front of you and not giving a fuck! lol
I think it connects to the whole idea that "Humor Is Pain" and how the first caveman laughed when his caveman buddy stubbed his toe -- he didn't mean to do it, and that's why it's funny. "Haha, you idiot!" The unexpected just makes you laugh and it's often accompanied by pain.
BeatsNBassNRhymes actually it isn't. We go month,day,year. It kind of makes sense because when you say what day it is in America most people phrase it as "may 6th" and not "the 6th of May".
As I get older, mine have become more tame. But when I was younger, I'd get the one they mentioned about like touching a cop's gun, or like attacking people or something. I wouldn't be angry or dislike the person. It would just be a complete stranger and I'd wonder what would happen if I harmed someone. But as I get older, they seem to have tamed for me. I still get them, but it's always something more social than violent. Like sometimes I get the urge to say something really disrespectful or angry to a supervisor or something. Or like if I have a female friend with absolutely NO attraction to whatsoever, sometimes I wonder "what if I said something really disgusting to her right now?" 😂 And just like Jim mentioned, sometimes I get like a pang of fear that it might just blurt out without me thinking of it. I have a very religious nice lady that I have become good friends with through work. No attraction or anything. Just a kinda cool person. And sometimes I might be texting or chatting on the phone. And without even thinking about it, I just think to myself "what if I ask her if I could do XYZ to her", and then I feel embarrassed by merely having the thought 😂😂
Haha I love how they’re crapping all over the opie cakestomp thing in the first 3 minutes
I was my older brother's best man, and during my speech I had the thought, "What would happen if I said he molested me when we were younger?" It would've been a total lie, but I had the utter attention of well over 200 people, and I had the potential to ruin the entire event (not to mention my brother's reputation) for everyone with just a few choice words. I just enjoyed the potential power of changing the entire atmosphere of the situation at my own will. Everyone has that power, it just takes a psycho to follow through with it.
Hey Bobo
@@-Twotonepony- he's not lawying alright, he really could have ruined that weddingk
What a terrible story. So you thought about doing something, but didn't. Like every single person in the world.
@@Ted_Sheckler Why is it a terrible story? I used to think I was a rare breed for having random and disturbing thoughts like that pop in my head. It's from reading and listening to so called "terrible stories" like that that I've come to realize it's more common than I thought. Those of us capable of controlling our worst impulses are just civilized beasts.
My ex girlfriend decided to ruin my brothers wedding day. At the reception she was getting drunk. She was only 20 years old and she went up to multiple people telling them that she was drinking for 2, knowing full well people would realize she was talking about me as I had just become sober after a DWI. Then she went up and told my 78 year old Catholic grandmother that I just asked her to marry me, my girlfriend was a Jew and my grandmother didn't approve of me leaving the catholic faith. Then told her that she was pregnant and then slammed 3 shots in front of her. She walked away and my grandmother fainted. My brother told me I need to leave with her because she had just went up in stage and told the whole party I had just proposed to her.
I had to take her home but in the way she woke up from her drunken stupor and blew me all the way home and then we had sex in the car in front of the neighbors.
I broke up with her. She was way too hot for me and at the time I didn't know how to handle her, especially with my low self esteemed and self worth. I blame myself for her actions because I didn't know how to man up. 10 years later she still hits me up and when I reject her she calls me a pussy and pathetic little man, like she used too. Now I just laugh at her and she asks why I couldn't have beg a real man when I was with her. She's just mad because I make 6 figures and my fiancee now gets to sit in her fat ass all night doing nothing.
Opie would have ended this three minutes in and ruined a good conversation.
Or derail it with something "Alright, Bob from Newark has a good one".... No he doesn't Opie, no he doesn't
He wasn’t even there and you can’t stop licking that mans hog. Smh.
"Faaaaaawk yeah, maaaaaan... I'll smash that shit, no problem. No fawkin' problem, man, no problem. Somebody get me something so I can break it YEAH... SOMEBODY GET SOMETHING TO BREAK... oh sorry, guys, I was just feelin' the moment (sniff)"
Jimmy won the “most prophetic adorable boy” award at Sirius.
Chip was already doing Opie bits in 2012. "How come I don't get invited to parties."
This one of my favorite segments
In HS the lazy teacher would turn on those old projectors that they would roll and place it in the middle of the aisle. Then turn off the light, stand in the hallway and crack the door. It was right there beside me and I said WTF, so I kicked it thinking it would roll. Instead the plug which could have held up a tank, did not pop out of the wall and instead the projector fell onto the floor smashing it. Lights turn on and here I am with my fucking leg stretched out both in horror and amazement. That event got brought up 10-15 yrs later during background checks and psy evaluations for certain positions.
Oh, so he put that in your permanent record.
Danny forgot about the other bill burr bit when he asked does anyone else have thoughts about driving through a crowd of people
I dont know why but I also create these awkward cringy moments in my head all the time
I sometimes have a dream where I see myself standing in sort of sun-god robes on a pyramid with a thousand naked women screaming and throwing little pickles at me.
I would love to just drop a fat log right in the middle of the aisle during a wedding while the bride is walking down.
We have the Ringbearer, the flower girl, and now the Shit boy
A tubular greasy one, like a labrador would shit in the yard.
i did it once to my friend i thought "what if i just karate chopped his neck would he get knocked out?"
i did it and he started crying asking me why i did that and i literally just stood there and wondered why did i do that to him...
😂😂😂 How old were you? Like was this some playground stuff, or were you like in your 20s lol
@@WaldoBagelTopper i was in second grade
I wanted to see how well I could throw a football so I threw it at my friend 30 yards away when he wasn’t looking and it drilled him in the face. I said I thought he would catch it and he said no I didn’t. He was right
In college we were at a sports bar talking about this kind of thing. On a dare I stood up emptied an entire pepper shaker on my head and yelled “I AM THE PEPPER MAN HEAR ME ROAR!!!” the worst thing is people barely looked up, and I was so embarrassed I had to leave and none of my friends would come with me.
14:58 Jimmy "or a racist tweet"
_A blah blah dah dah! My stupid wooden shoes! A blah dah dah!_
Damn shows without Opie in the latter xm/serious years were loose, fluid, hilarious shows with honest, funny as F conversations that were organic. I've laughed the entire 28 minute clip.
It’s only 21 minutes you motherless cuck
I’ve heard the reason we do this is, similarly to everything else, evolutionary. We learn from mistakes, we work hard to make our situation better when it’s bad. Conversely, when things are good you just assume it will keep going. Our brains are evolved to a point where we don’t have to experience something to learn, we can imagine it. It’s good for us to think of the worst in a given situation so we are prepared. So we don’t do it basically.
And people keep voting Democrat because it's funny to watch the world burn. This must be why The Joker is The Joker.
I've been looking for this bit on youtube for 2+ years, thank you SO MUCH
4:30 I've had that exact same feeling. Like you think you're doing it in your head but you did it in real life.
or when our driving down the highway with an urge to swerve into oncoming traffic
I think about that stuff all the time. And it's almost never out of anger or anything. I'm just legitimately crazy. I think my mind just naturally goes to the worst things I could possibly do...or at least it goes to the last things that I'd actually WANT to do, if that makes any sense.
Wow awesome segment, and a little tie-in at the end, to something that RELATES to what they're talking about.
I've though about pushing a cop and running for my life just to test my speed in full Adrenaline mode
Oh my Jesus, that was fucking funny. To me, the best part is that they basically held a mirror up to their own fanbase, in the process. They were, more or less, describing a year-round Jocktober that involved very close to home situations, turned up past 11.
Ahhhhhh....Sans Opie. Beautiful.
This is the best. O&a is the best thing to happen in the 20th century. This and family guy
How many people just completely ruined their lives the day this aired lol
Its BECAUSE of this video that sometimes I get terrified in public situations that I'm going to do something and not realize it until after I have done it lol!! I never thought about that shit until I heard this. Like I do the cop's gun thing in the check out line and stuff. Or I think about the "veering into oncoming traffic" thing. But I never thought about the whole "screwing up my job" thing 😂😂😂
Sam, Anthony and Jim are truly what should have been . Sam is funnier than opie but not pushy with it and definitely knows when to let funnier people run with things
Nah. Ant, Jimmy, and a good guest/guests
Opie stinks but so does Sam the half breed he is
@Robert nah otherwise it's just another podcast, believe it or not that shaven bear cub actually adds something
Shut up Sam
God I love this. Can totally relate
Sam’s awkward moment is when he blew his way into WWE and absolutely bombed.
That's crazy. How many days did YOU last in WWE?
I don’t know man they should’ve went to mike from Buffalo.
Or see what Mongo the trucker had to add to the conversation
Snowy from michigan.. SNOWAYY
Instead they went to Danny from Anthony's lap and Sam from Weaseltown
16:20, ant, i think "really rude" would've been an understatement
14:45 Just described Anthony's demise.
Drunk Sloppy
It's damn near eerie
It’s called the “Call from the Void”
Patrice's words?
@@impalapoppa4414 No, that's literally what its called. A phenomenon when people have those kinds of thoughts. That was the name given to it. Patrice might have said it, but he didnt come up with that.
I get those unspeakably stupid and downright mean things that I could do play in my head, knowing good and god damn well that they would change my life in an exceptionally dramatic way. Then, I realize how stupid it would be to actually do them.
Opie would've drove this right in the ditch. You ever uhh try to uhh do uhh uhh uhh uh idk a uhh, then somebody saves him. Opie: yehesss! Exactly you ever think of doing that?
For Sam this is "moments that would NEVER happen."
I've had these my whole life. Just thinking about how there is nothing stopping me from just randomly walking up to my boss and making a long drawn out noise while twitching my arms around, imagining the moment after it stops being worse than actually doing it and how I would never be able to undo it. What type of crazy people are we to think this kind of stuff?
Chris Farley?
What *would* happen if you just asked the cop for his gun?!
I've done this too and have no idea where it comes from.
good shit
A great segment, despite the two anchors
No Opie, good. Danny, not good.
Danny (and Sam) were tolerable in this one, where normally they're snide little shitheads.
"I have this fantasy about getting drunk in my 60's and then assaulting the daughter of a comedy club owner. Even after that happening I refuse to change my lifestyle in any way".
But you don't act on it. Just a fantasy.
Wow, Louis C.K. totally stole his joke about bringing a plane to the ground from Jimmy.
Michael M. If you listen to a bunch of the O&A's Louis was on you realise the germ of ideas for a lot of his bits were from the show. The Boston 'retahded' bit was a woman calling in and the boys making her say the word over and over.
"Maybe he's what miss? Your phone is breaking up."
"Maybe he's re-tah-ded."
@@morganyu3838 I'm from Boston and my aunt worked at Paul A Dever School for the Retarded. She would bring these people home sometimes. Ritahded meant something different to me than most people. It was actually quite scary sometimes. Whenever I hear Louis' bit, I think of those days and how ritahded those people were. Some were very much like Louis... just masturbating furiously in front of you and not giving a fuck! lol
I think it connects to the whole idea that "Humor Is Pain" and how the first caveman laughed when his caveman buddy stubbed his toe -- he didn't mean to do it, and that's why it's funny. "Haha, you idiot!" The unexpected just makes you laugh and it's often accompanied by pain.
1:34 11:50 14:14 19:00
is that how americans write dates? you crazy colonials!
no
5/23/12
BeatsNBassNRhymes actually it isn't. We go month,day,year. It kind of makes sense because when you say what day it is in America most people phrase it as "may 6th" and not "the 6th of May".
This is how the show should have been. Sam in opie's place is absolutely perfect because Sam is a smart-ass and is funny and he's not a narcissist
As I get older, mine have become more tame. But when I was younger, I'd get the one they mentioned about like touching a cop's gun, or like attacking people or something. I wouldn't be angry or dislike the person. It would just be a complete stranger and I'd wonder what would happen if I harmed someone.
But as I get older, they seem to have tamed for me. I still get them, but it's always something more social than violent. Like sometimes I get the urge to say something really disrespectful or angry to a supervisor or something. Or like if I have a female friend with absolutely NO attraction to whatsoever, sometimes I wonder "what if I said something really disgusting to her right now?" 😂 And just like Jim mentioned, sometimes I get like a pang of fear that it might just blurt out without me thinking of it.
I have a very religious nice lady that I have become good friends with through work. No attraction or anything. Just a kinda cool person. And sometimes I might be texting or chatting on the phone. And without even thinking about it, I just think to myself "what if I ask her if I could do XYZ to her", and then I feel embarrassed by merely having the thought 😂😂