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History's Funkiest Duels
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- Published on Mar 6, 2026
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Wait wait, don't duel me yet, I have to tie my shoes first.
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Linlithgow Black Dog Story Video ► • Wikipedia's Deleted Ar...
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no, thanks
STOP BEING GREEDY IN EVERY SINGLE VIDEO NOW
so cringe thanks for the slop
can i kiss you, mr huggbees
There’s nothing more badass than naming your dog “Dragon”.
What about your dog named dragon winning a crown sanctiont duel to avenge your murder?
What about _being_ a dog named Dragon
I heard that and was like WHAT DO YOU MEAN IM NOT THE ONLY ONE TO NAME MY DOG DRAGON?
I mean, having a dragon named "Dog" is a flex if you think about it
Only problem is if he acts up have fun saying “Bad Dragon” in that context
damn, i might be a little gay for huggbees
Aren’t we all?
No just you guys
Everyone is. He is canonically the hottest man in the world
god hes just so fucking hot
Im gay, and gay for hugbees.
My favorite Andrew Jackson fact is that they had to remove his pet parrot from his funeral. Because of how excessively the parrot was cursing. It developed such fowl language (I'm not sorry for that pun) that it couldn't be inside for his funeral.
He also got so pissed at an attempted assassin, the crowd had to pull the president off the assassin before he beat the guy to death with his cane
Okay, one fact about the Lincoln duel thats hilarious.
Mary Todd apparently found Lincoln's letter so funny she wrote her own seperate attack on Shield's character
Get you a ride or die like Mrs Lincoln
11:47 fuck all that rational skepticism and historical analysis. I’m choosing to fully believe that Dragon was a real dog and Certified Good Boy who avenged his master’s death.
all dogs go to hell so no
Duels are the same as Twitter arguments. The best way to win is to not engage because you're not basing who's right and wrong on anything concrete anyways.
I wish twitter arguments were half as cool as a duel
Duels are just ritualized 🥷 moments
@seg162is it still ninja moments if the people involved are not ninjas?
@akbarindo8976"wait a minute... I'm white 😀"
also apparently lincoln and musashi were both pioneers of ragebait
The Hamilton Musical didn't even include one of the more batshit almost-duels of the man's life.
Specifically I'm thinking about the time he nearly got into a duel with James Monroe, the future fifth president of the United States to a Duel. This was a part of the whole Reynolds affair.
Basically in short: the three people who actually confronted Alexander Hamilton about his relationship with James Reynolds were Frederick Muhlenberg, the Speaker of the House of Representatives and a delegate from Pennsylvania, Abraham Venable, and James Monroe (both Venable and Monroe at the time being members of the House of Representatives from Virginia).
Anyways, after the trio confronted Hamilton about it and getting the records from him, Monroe decided to make a copy of the records before handing them back to Hamilton.
This all happened in 1792, during the Washington Administration.
Then in 1797, a journalist by the name of James Callendar decided to publish a sequence of pamphlets about the whole affair, including copies of the records. The Reynolds Pamphlet was Hamilton's response to the allegations published by Callendar in those pamphlets, instead of him coming clean to the Public on his own as implied in the Musical.
Hamilton confronted Monroe about it, Monroe denied providing Callendar any information, the situation escalated and Monroe essentially ended up challenging Hamilton to a duel for implying that he was a liar.
The only reason this duel didn't happen was Aaron Burr deciding to step in to calm things down. Yes the same Burr who would later kill Hamilton in a duel.
Seriously, what was Hamilton's deal with Virginians? Washington was the only member of the Virginia Dynasty of Presidents that Hamilton didn't have massive issues with to the point where I'm wondering if Hamilton had some sort of issue with the entire state.
This isn't the only thing that annoyed me with Hamilton. But if I was to go off about that it would be seriously off-topic.
All I'm going to say is Alexander Hamilton is nicknamed *the Father of American Capitalism.* His financial plan and the deal that enabled it to go through is considered one of the most impactful events in the history of America for a reason. And the Musical somehow missed everything interesting that was happening alongside it (including a scheme by Assistant Secretary of the Treasury William Duer with some Bankers to enrich themselves based on Duer's inside knowledge (which he only had because Hamilton got him appointed to the position in the first place), and which lead to a major bank panic and financial crash), as well as literally any implications that this event has for the modern day.
We could've been having a serious and interesting discussion about this incredibly foundational event and the trade-offs and concerns that lead to the creation of America's Economic System and how we can take that knowledge to better understand modern day economic circumstances and figure out what we want to do about it.
But nope, we're not doing that. And it bugs me to no end.
@lucyla99 One of the first things I learned about the events of Hamilton after watching Hamilton was that Aaron Burr was not at all distraught over killing Alexander Hamilton. Having learned more about the real Alexander Hamilton, I do not blame Burr. Guy was an asshole of the highest degree.
@lucyla99 "ough i wish there was more economic policy in my hiphop musical"
@Veilure It's completely reasonable to expect that a Musical centered on the guy known as the Father of American Capitalism actually confront his most impactful legacy.
Like, why make a Musical about the Father of American Capitalism if you're not going to be bothered to actually say anything about the subject?
@lucyla99 They certain explain the "what" of the matter, it's conception and execution, but no, not it's legacy. That's because this is a hip-hop musical, not a dissertation.
The thumbnail of this video being Boyfriend and Funky Kong in an epic standoff with full 18th-century cosplay is why I fucking love Huggbees.
The other thumbnail is Robert Mage vs a dog in a Victorian era boxing ring
Id honestly love to see an fnf mod like that
@Nintendofan1389 same
@Nintendofan1389someone needs to do that
@Wailermanthats what im saying
Nothing illustrates the difference between the two presidents more perfectly than Lincoln’s strategy being to take advantage of his massive stature and win a broadsword duel by being more of a chad vs AJ coming up with the most counterintuitive strategy known to man and then cheating for the kill when it inevitably failed
It's played up for laughs here, but the strategy actually existed and wasn't complete nonsense. Duels weren't prolonged, and you generally didn't get to line up your shot (under Anglo-Saxon traditions, others allowed for aiming prior), so firing second gave you (slightly) more time to aim your pistol. It wasn't just about nerves prior to a duel, but the actual sequence of a duel made it so that the second to fire had an advantage for aiming.
That's also why the recock and fire was seen as a break in etiquette; usually the seconds would intervene and they would have to decide how to handle it (both refiring, the second duelist being allowed to reload and fire on count, declaring the duel over, etc.). Recocking meant you had _already_ aimed.
Lincoln was a smart guy, he knew the only winning move is not to play, but that Nancy ain't raise no bitch and terror was the order of the day
To think the age of powdered wigs, refined debates, and careful discussion of every issue possible was the one who also had the "cmon bro 1v1 me out in that field" style of solving beef
Maybe we need to bring that back.
Imagine if that’s how elections went
Starts thinking about MGRR
That would be sick
read refined diabetes and was confused for a good second
22:52 my headcanon is that yes charles apologized but andrew jackson waggled his finger and used the ancient "no taksies backsies" rule in order to keep the duel on
In reality Jackson was a coward and sore loser.
@thecluelessoutdoorsman916there’s a lot of bad things you can say about Jackson, but coward isn’t one of them
HE FINALLY FUCKING POSTED AGAINN
For real
New Mush and new Huggbees within 48 hours. Its like the old bygone glory days of idk maybe 2 years ago.
bro its been only a month that is not that long
@LeastLikelyToSucceed-z3u3x and he has his gaming channel if y'all like that. I watch that sometimes too, and I don't play games.
"I'm laying pipe and this shit is insulated!" that's gold 😅
33:40 anyone else remembers the channel that used to microwave random objects to see what would happen
"Is it a Good Idea to Microwave This?" I loved that channel
yeah, makes me feel ancient
They had the coolest custom background on their channel page ever, a full list of every episode by number and season down the side.
personally i prefer the version of the fight of Musashi and Kojiro where Musashi didn't make a wooden sword out of the oar, but instead just grabbed the entire oar, got off the boat and suddenly hit Kojiro on the head with it. No one would expect a sudden OAR ATTACK in a sword fight
Good but making a sword out of it very epic and very thematic and insulting
Correction: While Miyamoto Musashi absolutely was a real person, his rival Sasaki Kojiro's existence is far more disputed -- there's no real timeline of his life that doesn't come from fiction -- and he might just have been a made up ultimate adversary in Musashi's life story, or maybe he was real but all the things associated with him, like his super long sword, ultimate technique Tsubame Gaeshi, etc, might be made up
nerd… nerd… nerd… Nerd… NErd… NERd… NERD… NERD,NERD,NERDNERDNERDNERDNERDNERDNERDNERD.
But yes, the best RUclipsr on RUclips hugbees should be accurate as any person perusing greatly fantasized and hyperbolic versions of duels in history.
Also Tsubame Gaeshi’s description in a lot of sources does just sound like an anime technique.
@AshleyoftheSwiftspear-pb8cs Almost certainly, that's a case of "other way around"
@AshleyoftheSwiftspear-pb8cs Tsubami Gaeshi sounds like anime bullshit normally, but that's because it's often romanticized. It basically comes down to
"in one motion, swing your sword down, then turn it & swing back up. If the first strike didn't hit then they think you missed, not expecting the second, return strike. You either hit them, or take them off guard, opening them up for your next attack."
Which is a fairly solid idea in theory. It's even used in Hanachirasu, a Visual Novel that was written by a kendo master who uses real techniques in his stories' weapon play. It's definitely not the super duper perfect anime insta kill move it's made out to be, but a move as deceptive & fluid as Tsubami Gaeshi definitely has teeth, even if there's no timeline where it's flawless
@Fanimati0nI fully get that it’s a very realistic move, and that’s awesome as hell, but you’d get why even your description sounds like something that comes out of a sword battling manga trying to be realistic while not actually pulling from any irl swordplay because the author is rule of cooling sword combat.
It’s very cool that this historically anime ass technique is very grounded in reality outside of romanticism, but holy shit does that romanticism exist for a reason.
Huggbees is the next Funkin’ collab.
This MIGHT be peak
Let's appreciate this man's refusal to film without sunglasses on. Honestly, they've kinda melded with his character by now.
I can imagine a 3D model of him that looks just like him, but the sunglasses can be animated like cartoony eyes. Someone here has probably seen the TF2 pyro model where the gas mask does that. The existence of this would enrich the SFM animation community
One thing I love about medieval duels between knights was that they were often described to have a set progression:
Horseback -> on foot and armed -> both dudes are so fucking tired from swinging heavy weapons in full plate armor for hours on end that they just drop their weapons and throw haymakers at each other until one keels over from exhaustion
That's some professional wrestling "Next time in a cage" bullshit.
2:29 I think Huggbees knows his audience too well.
A little bit gay? I’m straight but I’m fully gay for Huggbees
Friday Night Funkin finally made it to a Huggbees thumbnail yall are never reaching this peak again
Why is the thumbnail different for me?
@CUMBRO-whizzit got updated
Aaaaaand it's gone
"Why is it that if I want to legally kill someone these days, I have to be rich, famous, or a cop?"
I love youtubers that hold no punches.
Well, 58% of all violent crime goes unsolved in the US - and that's the ones we know about.
@Khornecussionokay bootlicker
How brave to make a nonspecific joke about something that isn't all that controversial.
@altKingCarrotNever did I once say the word brave in my comment. Quit being negative towards everything in your life and maybe a grain of happiness will finally find its way to you.
@altKingCarrot and you can't even grow a pair to just admit that you don't agree with the point. bRaAaVe.
How long have his glasses been that reflective?
Ive been trying to look at the reflection for the past 15 mins, i can see the script but i cannot figure out whats on the 2nd monitor
They've always been, but it's hard to look away from his perfect being.
Lol
It changes. At around 12:50 you can see it's a live feed of what he's recording.
Oh, there's 3 monitors! So there's gunna be a bunch of stuff.
@brookedoesstuff Same here, even at 4k resolution I cant figure it out
I hate that I had to double check Marigny's Wiki page because Andrew would 100% both lie and not lie about someone having a fart fetish
DAMN YOU, YOU HILARIOUS AND HUMBLE LIARMAN lolol
Was it a lie?
Yes, yes it was the lie
That has got to have been the coolest dog that has ever lived.
44:29 I, as a blacksmith, confirm this. Most of us are thieves, crooks and cowards.
The version of the Andrew Jackson I heard is:
By dueling etiquette at the time, you weren’t allowed to reload until both people had fired their shot.
Jackson let the other guy fire first, was subsequently hit an inch from his heart. And by etiquette, Jackson was allowed to take as much time as he wanted.
So Jackson walked up to the man and proceeded to shoot him in the stomach. The man surrendered immediately from the pain, but would go on to die 11 days later from infection.
The bullet would remain by Jackson’s heart for the rest of his life, but in exchange gave a man the most agonizing 11 days of their life.
I looked up a .gov version of the duel and it showcases an illustration with the two duelists a few feet from one another m. Perhaps that came from a literal interpretation of this drawing ?
FNF Boyfriend in a Huggbees thumbnail, idk how to feel
Edit: unfortunately aged like milk
Aged like milk after one day is crazy
How dare they gatekeep this for 29 seconds
Boredom being dangerous is hilariously accurate.
Never duel a giant with greatswords.
1:33
Why did this unlock a core memory??
*There better be air balloons and a stab fight in the back of a carriage in this video*
My favorite duel in fiction comes from the count of monte cristo where Fernand is challenged to a duel by the husband of the wife he slept with, and fernand wins and murders him. It’s so depressing but also kinda funny
Yo Sydney payday 2
@Channel9iNEyo max payne 3
It's also one of the *three* duels that weren't in the novel and that were added in just that one movie.
No hate towards the film though, it really knows what it wants to be.
I'd have to go for Duel of the Fates in Star Wars. Epic fight. Even more epic soundtrack.
@RedPineaplleStudiooh I didn’t know that. I haven’t read the book yet but that movie is one of my absolute favorites. Adds so much to what a POS his character is. Does he still cheat in the Novel too?
8:49 Wait! No seed oils? no refined sugars? AND NO ARTIFICIAL COLORS! Holy cow hugbees! Thank you for the warning! I can’t believe I was almost considering signing up for Factor, before watching this video.
Thank you for your public service in warning people away from this company’s evil food.
Why are Factor a bunch of seed haters???
Ah yes my favorite historical duel, Andrew Graves vs Marth from Smash Melee
Does anyone else recognize the hot air balloon story from bluejay’s video?
Who?
@Bacxaber ruclips.net/video/SFPeTVLpmgQ/video.htmlsi=ci1HIn4pzmHamkcW
2:35 I mean you got that bear build
10:29 isn't defenestrate mean to throw someone out of a window? I don't see how that works in this context
You’re correct, and it doesn’t work in that context
10:27
I'm guessing he either forgot what it means or knows what it actually means and is just joking
He might’ve meant ventilate?
It has more than one meaning, including being used just to mean the removal of one's adversary, in fact, it is used more for this meaning than the window meaning, by a significant margin 🤦 such a large margin in fact, that I'm legitimately surprised that the window thing is even labeled as the first definition on Google, because it is almost never used in its literal Latin translation meaning, because no one is murdered via being thrown out a window often enough for it to warrant having a single word that means killing someone by throwing them out a window, nor has that ever been something that was very common in history 🤦 yes it is something that has happened, and yes the word was coined because of that happening, but it has never been a common enough occurrence to warrant having a single word to define that act, the Latin were just really fucking weird and liked making up words for things that didn't need single words for that meaning, there's a reason Latin is a dead language 💀 and the people being who used it being that excessive and ludicrous definitely didn't help, also probably didn't help that they seemed to have enough people being murdered via being thrown out a window to warrant having a single word to reference it 🤦 but no, literally no one uses the word to mean someone was thrown out a window, the word would literally never get used if people only used it to refer to someone being thrown out a window. Hugbees did in fact use the word correctly and in its most contemporary usage
There is decent evidence that the wall behind huggbees' monitors is covered with green screen and if so I must applaud the attention to detail
Dang, I might be a little straight for Huggbees.
To quote hit video game Pizza Tower: "Ya'll ready to get funky?"
0:06 mutual combat is a thing in Texas and Washington (state), it’s as close to a duel as you can legally get nowadays.
2:35 im not just a little gay im alot gay
Same
Weiner is my favorite vegitable
He said that right while I was staring at the subtle bulge in his adidas track pants.
thank you for your service 🏳️🌈🫡
Pingas
Someone’s already done an Abraham Lincoln playthrough of Skyrim with just a wood axe, but good to know that long swords are also on the table!
51:34 no i mainly know only miyamoto because of sabaton
Man im hoping for the dual between Rinsing Machine and Filling Machine
40:13 my favorite part of the Abraham Lincoln movie was when Lincoln started hamming it until he Linced all over the place
In the duel with the participants of “Bob Vs. Dragon”… there’s really only one way that was ever gonna end 😂
I fully believe the Hamilton slander exists to both drive up engagement and provide him with people to duel (mostly the latter)
3:22 bro was trying to unlock the mangekyo sharingan
52:56 There are historians who question if Kojiro Sasaki was a real person, but Musashi Miyamoto absolutely was.
I think this is the issue. It’s due to the amount of history on Sasaki due to his low matches.
Being fair to this story, something people don’t talk about is experienced samurai died everyday.
Sword fighting isn’t always so cut and dry.
Yeah was gonna say this - Musashi was ABSOLUTELY real, but Kojiro's authenticity as a real person ranges from "there was, in fact, a real guy called Sasaki Kojiro" to "his name wasn't Sasaki Kojiro but he was real" to "he's a bunch of different samurai that got merged into one guy called Sasaki Kojiro by historians".
The final duel did actually happen, though.
Évariste Galois was a brilliant mathematician who proved at a young age that there are no general algebraic solutions to polynomial equations of degree 5 or greater. (Remember the quadratic formula? Well there's also the cubic formula and the quartic formula, but Galois proved that the quintic formula and so on don't exist.)
He died in a duel in his early twenties. It's not clear what the duel was even about or who it was with. But it's sad and funny to wonder what else he might have contributed to the world if his life hadn't ended so senselessly.
We should build a time machine to invent rock, paper, scissors earlier so people have a way to solve disputes based off arbitrary results without resorting to murder.
Hamilton the musical, in this new universe, ends with Hamilton throwing Rock and Burr still shooting him because guns shoot rocks with the use paper wadding
Or better yet,
*holds up a deck of Yu-Gi-Oh cards.
We show them what real dueling looks like.
IT’S TIME TO DUDU-DU-DU-DUDUDUDUDUEL!
"I'm off to France."
I was so confused at the thumbnail bro
Interestingly, Otto von Bismarck was in fact a fairly prolific duelist during his student years, though these weren't to the death.
Allegedly, the only time he ever got wounded in one was when his opponents rapier snapped and Bismarck was hit by one of the fragments.
He also was shot and completely tanked it, and used to announce his presence during his younger years by firing a gun into the ceiling
Not a dueling historian, but by definition, a misfire is not a shot. A trigger pull is not a shot. For a firearm to shoot, it goes bang, and a projectile is fired.
Also, if one of the participants is Andrew Jackson, the rules don't apply, he's just gonna fuckin' kill ya.
42:26
If you’re curious, he had been dead for like a decade by 1878. Making it pretty hard for him to do anything.
I can’t find anyone saying anything similar online besides the Quora question so I’m not even sure where they even got that information from in the first place, as it doesn’t seem to be a commonly spread myth or something of the sort.
i love staring at your room through your indoor sunglasses
I literally was just wondering about the possibility that there was a new Huggbees post, and luckily for me this just got uploaded 12 minutes ago.
The place at the 30 second mark is called Sovereign hill, it's this tourist thing that still has all of the old stuff from the Aussie western days.
Nothing says American like blowing away your rival with the full power of a black powder firearm
Hey justin
Now is not the time to be saying this, Justin Y.
Justin Y tells no lie
We need to go back to using the dignified rapiers
My patriotism is swelling from that mental image
Seeing the Musashi and Kojiro duel get brought up was so fun.
2:35 Every day man, every day
been a bit! i almost forgot how much i loved when run on sentences that are usually fine as people can read them only for it to be read back later in front of a camera and be an absurdly long winded thing to say in a single breath man
2:35
God damnit man stop reading my mind! I thought this was a RUclips video, not a psychoanalysis...but yeah he's little bit very handsome
Tararre would never fight Charles Domery. The 2 would rather team up and eat everything and everyone in sight, just to satisfy their never ending hunger
Huggbees just casually admitting he doesn't like Hamilton? Okay, okay I'll allow this. As a musical fan, you can say this huggbees 😂
Is it just me or did huggbees go more unhinged hence more entertaining
i just want to say: i was not biting my lower lip because im gay for huggbees. it was itchy. but i do feel called out
So THATS how Chunky kong died
Dragon is a real one.
I’ve also wished for the legalization of duels to return
I caught myself saying "yooo this is just like that duel video" *twice* in the same day. i think you've altered my brain chemistry, sir
12:11 Worst part is, I’m pretty sure only Juliet was a teenager while Romeo was a young adult.
I paused the video to look this up. It's never actually stated in the text. Based on context clues and what we know of the historical period, the general consensus is that Romeo is 15-16 and that Juliet is 13 almost 14. So both still teenagers.
They were both young adults in their culture.
Why are you injecting modern day moral values to a 400 year old story..?
Genuinely had fun subjecting unsuspecting individuals to 1 hour of Huggbees talking, and appreciate the laughter at the end.
Do you prefer to fill the dishwasher or to empty a dishwasher?
Empty. 100%.
Holy shit your glasses are so fucking shiny
20:00 Tbh Jackson was worse cuz he caused The Trail of Tears
He’s morally ambiguous
I wonder what is being reflected in his red sunglasses
7:53 FUCK FACTOR_! Those bastards accused me of intentionally stealing food from their cafeteria despite the fact I worked 7 straight days as a security guard and it was nearly 2 in the morning!
Sounds like you stole food
@kuroneko334 I’ll have you know I did not and the unemployment insurance people agreed with me!
nothing worse than a food thief. glad they cut you off
@AnAverageGoblin I would agree with you, except I didn’t steal the food. They just accused me and fired me, despite evidence I didn’t.
@CharizardMaster69 Suure.
Huggbees is to the RUclips landscape what Groucho Marx was to Hollywood comedies. That means no matter how many times you watch his videos, they'll age like fine wine.
Damn, I might be a little gay for Huggbees. (I'm normally a lot gay so this is surprising for comedic reasons.)
And just when the world needed him most, he returned
Lets starts dueling.
*pulls out my duel monster's deck.*
Unfortunate for you I already have exodia
I remember reading this fantasy book as a kid where they had a duel with billiard balls and I thought it was really funny back then, turns out it was a reference
I love men
Me too, men are very handsome :3
The exodia in the glasses reflection is great
i would love to duel someone
Damn, Huggbees going Kaioken x10 is one of the most intimidating things I’ve seen of all time.
Thanks for having me on the podcast
Proot
@natetheavali Hi
I love these kinds of videos, they're the best
0:06 what a way to start a video.
Don’t forget ICE
Can already tell this is gonna be a masterpiece
given i am a woman, "damn i might be a little gay for hugbees" implies that you are too. congrats on your transition! (/silly)
Huggbees being bi and genderqueer tracks
You should make a video about the goodest boys throughout history and include Dragon
The Bible joke at 10:00 makes me giggle even though it’s so obvious.
Even the birthday of Jesus is up for debate
@A@Anaverageplant342h as a former Protestant trust me I know that brother.
I’m pretty jaded by religion but I respect others personal beliefs as long as they don’t yap about it with me, also they should be able to make fun of themselves cuz that shows atleast a little humility.
Lincoln out here really being a Grate Champion