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I know so many women that are like "I was a lesbian but I met a good man and got over it" like.... So you're bisexual. Ugh so frustrating
I had a pastor’s wife come and talk to all the girls in Youth Group about attraction. She said that romantic feelings are just intense platonic feelings (no???). She also said it was “completely normal” for a woman to find another woman physically and/or romantically attractive, but it’s unacceptable and unnatural to cross the platonic/romantic line with another woman.
My aroace butt had to hold back from saying “NO?!?” Being attracted towards women is NOT something every woman experiences.
Oh yeah, btw. Her parents are lesbians. But she is extremely homophobic, and blame her super loving and supportive kind moms for making her childhood less complete by not having a father… not anything specific about that, just that she felt like her childhood would be better if she had a dad. Also, she runs a foundation that says it fights for children’s right!… children’s rights are to have a father and mother, so single parents shouldn’t have kids and a kid with no parents is better than one with gay parents. Also, parents have the right to control their kids. Yay!
@@The1stPurpleCatman I already don't respect her 😅 rather be shameless than plastic. I have more respect for the ppl who flash their tits in front of gay convert camps than whatever this woman does.
@@The1stPurpleCat The comeback, “Counterpoint: Your moms,” was literally RIGHT THERE! (I’m sorry it’s just too funny.)
@@thegrandxbunny2073 NOO! I couldn’t! 🤣 I should have tho!
I’m literally the pastors daughter… well… sorta? My dad’s been a pastor my whole life. At that church specifically, he was taking on the role of pastor’s right hand man, and youth pastor, and music director, and head musician. And my mom was the Sunday School teacher.
My parents are super homophobic, and everyone at the church was super homophobic. I was still a very scared child who didn’t wanna come out. Plus, being a pastor’s kid my whole life, it’s a very unique and terrible experience, and you have certain expectations from others.
However, if I could go back to that church, I really wanna hear that lady say something homophobic, so I can say, “counterpoint: your moms”.
I’m bisexual too but I only like women.
Fun story for positive vibes. My child yesterday told me her name was Julia not her birthname. She's 2 and liked the name from seseme Street and so i said "oh hi julia" she giggled and just kept saying Julia Julia Julia 😅 it was cute
I went to a school where we did something different each week. One week, we each adopted a new name. We chose all sorts of names, from Dragon" to "Amersand" to "Big Sam". Mine was "Tyger" (spelling taken from William Blake's poem). One girl chose "Meadow".
We all used our new names at school. We called each other by them. The teachers called us by them (they had new names, too). Some of us took our new names home and asked our families to call us by our new names, too.
When the week was over, everyone went back to our old names . . . except for Meadow. She went on calling herself Meadow for the rest of the year, when the school dissolved.
I met Meadow years later. She was married, and still went by Meadow. I told her that sometimes I wished I had stayed with Tyger.
@arcadiaberger9204 that's really sweet. It's not too late to use tyger if you're serious about regretting it
Aw
Both the stories in these comments are so cute! Omg
Reminds me of when I heard the name June from Little Einsteins and thought it was a pretty name and so when I was 7 I convinced a substitute teacher to call me June 😄
"Help! I indoctrinated my kid as hard as I could and it didn't work" is wild
We must protect kids from predatory perverts in the LGBTQ community
@@professorfoxtrot Being born lgbt does not make someone predatory or a pervert. Every single group of people has bad apples, but lgbt people don't have a higher percentage than other groups.
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I was one of those kids, can confirm I still ended up gay ahahahahaaahahahahahahhaahahahahhhahahahahhahahahhahhhhahahhhaaaahahaahhahhahahahah * *ptsd flashbacks* *
@@professorfoxtrot
We must protect kids from ACTUAL predators in churches, the clergy, and people of power
We must protect kids from the people who want to take others rights away and allow for discrimination and bullying that leads to depression and s*icidality
We must protect kids from potentially ab*sive parents (including unsupportive ones, which IS ab*se) and the potential of they being homeless if they happen to be kicked out for who they are
We must protect them from capital punishment, like hittings and "spankings" which have been proven to be ab*sive, ineffective, and have lasting trauma connected to them
We must protect them from people like you who don't know what they're talking about about and try to indicate them into cults or baby factories if they happen to not want kids of theif own
We must protect them from state higher-ups that vote to keep child marriage and ban abortions, who agree with forced birth, and ban proper education so they dont know when they're being s*xually ab*sed or a*sulted
We must protect them from parents who use their image online for profit and exploitative entertainment
There are so many ACTUAL problems we have to protect kids from, and LGBT people are not one of them
Just because someone is different from you doesn't make them predatory, just because YOU decide
The whole making a big fuss about pronouns was something my parents did with me. I've been out for almost three years now and I still get surprised at being gendered correctly because of how much my parents made me feel like a burden by being trans
character growth I guess? Maybe there's still hope
kurt pfp
Lol the pronoun thing is stupid. Guy straight up asked me ' what if they say their a bus or a duck?' Then their a bus or a duck, steve. I don't care, I'll call anybody anything they want. Doesn't effect me and makes them happy.
'But God says...' sounds like you got a pretty shitty God, Steve. Have you looked into Satanism? Their God sounds better. Lol
Steve avoids me and I got a warning from my manager on religious tolerance. Apparently calling someone's God shitty is rude.
My parents made a big enough fuss about my friend coming out that I’ve been out to everyone but them for years now. I’ll never tell them. It’s not worth it
I came out to my older sister as queer almost 4 years ago, and although she ‘accepted’ that part of me. When I asked her to start using ‘they/them’ pronouns, that was where she drew the line and refused to even try. She still misgenders me to this day.
Sidenote: I also came out to my dad because I thought he would accept me. Ended up cutting contact with him, because he kept saying I wouldn’t have turned out gay and queer if I had only gone to church more often. Or had a better ‘less’ traumatized childhood. Which fun fact HE CONTRIBUTED to??
When I asked him to start using my pronouns he said “Why do I have to use them if you’re so secure in your identity??”. It’s a long story…
But tldr please don’t be afraid to be who you truly are. I know there are some unsafe circumstances in which you can’t. Also know that there are people and friends out there who will love and accept you for who you are. For me at least. Found family has been the best.
The one about the trans cousin….. “oh no my child is starting to think for himself and evolve as a person!” The horror.
Parents need to step in and protect their children from becoming delusional
@professorfoxtrot the only delusional one is you
@professorfoxtrot being transgender isn't a delusional. It's just a thing that happens. Just like being intersex is a biological reality that can affect the development of organs, hormones, and chromosomes; so to is the intersexing of biological brains. You'll just have to learn to accept that it happens sometimes :)
@professorfoxtrot Yeah, or we’ll end up with more people spamming comment threads of videos they hate with dumb mumbo jumbo.
No offense.
@@KC-sd7nh thanks for the scientific explanation, which means absolutely nothing.
"Power tools" had me dying 😂. One of my friends is a transman and he was over one day and he's sitting on the couch hemming a pair of his pants. I (ciswoman) am putting up shelves and fixing a vacuum. He just bursts out laughing gesturing between us and i start laughing and we both agreed The Straights would NOT approve.
I'm straight and I would approve XD the whole gendering tasks stuff, and subsequently shaming people for not following sexist expectations is just... sooo tedious and exhausting. Especially when you look at certain things in a historical context.
Some activities considered "feminine" and thus, 'lesser' these days were, in some places/times in history, only allowed to be performed by men - including things like knitting and ballet dancing.
Bigots' ignorance would be hilarious if it wasn't sad.
@@ShintogaDeathAngel 🤣 I'm so glad this gave you a giggle. It was a great bonding experience for us and we got to have some awesome constructive conversations about hobbies triggering dysmorphia because of how 'gendered' they are in society.
Noooo you cant do that!!!!!!🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡!!!!!!! my holy book said you cant😡
@@TeaMollie11 🤣🤣💀 love this
These parents I feel would be the type that would freak out if their children came home after converting to different religion. I wonder if they would be more upset over Islam or Atheism?
Islam, u know y 😢
Being atheist isn't really a religion but it's "trans religious" from the point of those awful parents
Even just the “wrong kind” of Christian
i think they would be equal level upset over both
The knowledge there there's even infighting with different versions of Christianity is insane to me
My mother would SO have been one of these parents. She had a problem with me calling my boyfriend my "partner" instead of boyfriend because it sounded like I was dating a woman I guess.
The mother who couldn’t decide what name to put on their child’s christmas present reminds me of my own father. He refuses to call me by my chosen name, but has been told not to call me my given name by myself and other family members, so he has now landed on calling me nothing. It’s utterly ridiculous if you ask me 🙄
I have a story with a happier ending than these, if you need it:
Growing up, I attended a church that just... didn't talk about same-sex attraction. In support of or against, there weren't any sermons on it. There was a liiiittle bit of the purity thing I think in Youth group, but that's about it. Still, a lot of people who attended were more conservative, especially in the older bunch.
By the time I was in high school, my family had been attending the same church for years and my sister and I were generally known as "good girls" in the church amongst the older crowd. My sister sang solos and they loved her voice, and I was often confused for her and did volunteering. Even the older people who could tell us apart were very friendly and liked the fact that we, as teens, would actually talk with them.
One person who always spoke to me was an older man who had a grandson my age that went to my school. The grandson and his parents attended a different church. This man adored his grandson and was excited that I went to the same school, so I'd listen as he talked to me about his grandson's achievements (which I already knew from the morning announcements) and I'd give him the rundown of any big school events and how they worked as well as bits of "youth culture" so he could understand where his grandson was coming from a little better.
Now, the grandson was very popular in my school and I was pretty shy, so we never talked, but I knew who he was. The grandson was also out a little at school, but I didn't know if he was out to his family. I never said anything of course, as I had friends who were out to me but not out to their family as well and understood at least that much.
Like I said, I didn't know the grandson personally, but I did get an idea of when he came out to his family because suddenly a lot of my conversations with his grandfather would turn to what actually made a sin and how was it really our place to judge? I'll always remember the look of relief on his face when I broached the subject of how same-sex attraction isn't really addressed in the Bible, and how easily people can misinterpret things and maybe it's okay if we don't know for certain. He didn’t bring up his grandson's sexuality in so many words until a later conversation, but it was like he just needed a sounding board for how to process it.
This man grew up with the assumption that being gay was wrong and sinful, but when he learned about his grandson, his thought wasn't to have his grandson change. I don't believe for a second that his love for his grandson ever wavered. Although he struggled with processing it all to some degree, his absolute love for who his grandson was caused him to call over 50 years of faith into question. Not only did his faith come out stronger with the testing, but about a year later he was telling me with just as much excitement and pride as before about his grandson's new relationship with his boyfriend.
I'm not sure if the grandson ever knew exactly how much his grandfather loved him, but I will always remember those small conversations. I can only imagine that the grandson may have felt hurt if he knew how his grandfather struggled, but I hope that everything turned out alright for both of them. I suspect it did. What I do know for certain is that the grandson is thriving, and has what looks like a happy relationship with his partner and a strong bond with his mother. This, of course, is just what I've seen on Facebook, but it always brings a smile to my face.
I am definitely of the belief that God makes all sorts of people for a reason, and I'm not about to claim I know His Will. Christianity is not a religion based on certainties; all I know is that I am meant to love others. Who they love and how doesn't change that.
The grandfather really did love his grandson ❤️❤️❤️❤️
That’s so sweet. I’m so glad that boy and his family turned out okay. It can be so stressful to come out, even in a nonChristian family. I can’t imagine how scared he was :(, I’m happy his family loved him so much!
I also grew up in a Christian home and church environment, and I don’t know how the people around me felt. But my youth pastor tried very hard during one sermon to remove any hate and negative biases about homosexuality (since this was during the time when people were getting upset about churches donating to pride charities).
He said that if having a same sex relationship was a sin, then we can’t forget that lying was a sin as well. And if we don’t hold people hostage for lying, hating on them, and telling them they’ll burn in hell for it, then why should we do that for homosexuality? He ended the sermon with telling us that God’s greatest commandment was to love. And we can’t love others while judging and hating them (he also snuck in a few verses on how God deliberately says we have no place to judge others XD). I remember being so excited to tell my friend, who is gay, about that sermon. It seemed like a step in the right direction, and I wanted her to know the world was changing, and she might not be so rejected in the future.
I don’t believe in judging others and hating people simply for sinning. I will hold people accountable for hurting others, but if you’re not hurting anyone (regardless of whether or not the Bible says it’s a sin), then it’s not my place to judge. It’s between them and God, and I don’t need to butt my nose into it. Now I just wish more people would actually read the Bible, and not just skim it looking to confirm their biases. If you’re going to base your whole moral code off a book, then don’t cherry pick.
I was raised and was part of a Christian cult until my early 30s where they considered being queer a choice and were to be treated as 3rd class citizens to be converted or destroyed. This was in Canada btw.
It took the church closing down and me actually taking the time to listen to queer people and their experiences and a great deal of introspection to get me to accept the fact that I'm bisexual and a trans woman.
I'm way happier now than I ever was pretending to be a cishet man.
I was born bi and trans, and wouldn't change it for the world. Trying to cover it up and fit in gave me health issues physical, emotional, and mental that I'm still dealing with and probably still will for years to come.
Glad you got away. Can't imagine what horrible thing happened to close down the church. Cults are hard to get rid of and hide behind their "religion." I'm happy for you. 💜🖤💜🖤
Well, for the first woman, I feel comfortable assuring her that her child will indeed be transformed.
(Also, this group pisses me off in part because my mom is part of a fb parents' group for parents of children with a serious disease. Her group is full of parents asking each other about how to afford and administer their babies' medication and talking about organ transplants for their newborns, and these folks are over here like: *You guys...it's just so hard to have a gay child* 😢Unreal.)
I just imagine she's meets god in the afterlife and he's like, "I did transform her, who do you think invented hormones?"
i feel like most of facebook is either the daily wire but soft or absolute gibberish
Almost every social media app has rubbish.
My fb feed is literally just emo shit, queer shit, and furry shit
It’s barely even soft. It’s straight up far-rite daily wire rhetoric at this point
I mostly use it for selling shit.
My little brother came out as trans like 3 years ago. It coincided with the tail end of the pandemic and me moving out to college so it really stressed out my parents. They’ve never been transphobic or homophobic - they taught us the respect everyone. But when my brother came out their world turned 180. It was a rough few months as they reevaluated my brothers life, they were wondering if they missed signs, if they forced him to act like a girl by accident. Part of them did hope it was just a phase of gender exploration. It was a LOT of inner turmoil for them - especially my dad. But at the end of the day they always told my brother they loved him. That they did not think any less of him. I can’t say what my parents were feeling or thinking but they made sure my brother knew he was loved. Fast forward today - and my brother has legally changed his name and is almost 1 year on T! There are still days where my parents miss the little girl they raised, but then they see the young man they’ve had the privilege to see bloom and they’re happy as can be
The process of understanding and accepting your trans/gay child is not always easy. It can be really hard and can change the dynamic of the relationship. But what’s most important is that you love them unconditionally.
Not on the right side, kid......
@@chris135x talking about yourself, again I see.
@@ShintogaDeathAngel No. I'm talking about you "people".
@@chris135x
Wow. So edgy, we are litterally shaking in our boots, pants have been shidded and pissed, currently on the floor crying, cant believe the whole LGBT community was destroyed by someone acting like an ass on the internet.
Now if you will excuse us, we will go and have a life full of joy and happiness without you.
@@UsedToLikePKMN2416 Wow typical. You're offended by the word people but in quotes. That's about the only thing I said that you paid attention to. You liberals are not "happy".
I always find it interesting how some Christians refuse to use other than birth names, “because it’s against Bible” but at the same time Bible has multiple people who have changed their name and those same Christians are perfectly okay referring to those people from Bible with the new names (example: Saint Paul, formerly known as Saul of Tarsus)
I'm a cis and bi young adult. My parents were and are never scared of buying me things and clothes that are considered for males' only by the society because all they know is I have a taste for all things which are labelled for men, women and non binary people because I change my aesthetic almost everyday 😂 on top of everything I belong to a country where LGBTQ+ marriage is illegal but I'm very grateful that I have scientifically thinking, unconditionally loving parents ❤
My brother used to be an ally, and has slowly over the course of about six months become more and more like these people. it really is a pity to see.
Did he become religious? Or maybe more religious than before?
Homophobia is learned. So someone or something in his life is teaching him to be this way.
@@midnightsan9917 yeah my mom. I live in an insanely bigoted house
@@minachernobog we were both raised religious, then both stopped for a while. I don't know what happened but he's a certified bible thumper now.
That’s so sad to hear
I definitely won’t (and y’all shouldn’t) but I’m sorely tempted to create a burner FB account and get into these communities. Not to be a nuisance or troll, just spread a bit of positivity and see how others react if I give people good advice to live with their LGBTQ+ children.
I’m just wondering what would happen if the members were told to accept and love their trans/gay/etc kids - whether if a ban would be issued or if members throw hate and/or bible verses in response. Once again nobody should do this, but I’m kinda tempted.
In case you do, i wanna know what happens
So if ic it's not to hate which I would approve as well ur also just helpinf
@@thecrazygooseofyourdreams4785I can’t because I don’t use Facebook, plus I feel like I’d lose more hope in humanity if I spent 10 minutes looking at parents disapproving of their queer children.
Chances are people get banned fast
@@PansyPops i get that, feel the same tbh
I came out as trans in 2020 in the mist of covid. I also started taking anti-depressants at the time. I told my parents I was s**cidal. They told me that meds are just a crutch. I am following trends online. How do you as a parent sit there and hear that from your child completely invalidate your child's experience and feelings? As a parent, I would be scared shitless to hear my child say something like that to me.
"Meds are just a crutch."
They....are aware what crutches are for, right? They are aware that walking on a broken leg is bad for you, right??
@@salemcrow5078Yeah meds are literally just to support you, they aren't a 100% cure
This is the thing - if you have XYZ experiences in life, e.g. autism, that you can't explain the symptoms of, and come across people talking about experiences that do fit what you've experienced, and you can start putting names/labels on it, then it's likely you are going to start looking more into those things.
They can look like "trends", but it's literally people raising awareness and talking about their own struggles in the hope they can help others and maybe find support for themselves, too.
28:25 WOE IS ME, WHATEVER WILL I DO! My child is actually acting Christ like, my long lineage of hypocrites gone just like that.
i'm still just super impressed at you going undercover as a wasp mom tbh
I was raised catholic and sheltered from the internet and queerness. I didn't even learn that gay people existed until I was around 10 years old. I realized I was queer when I was 15 and started transitioning when I was 20. If I had the power, I would have started transitioning before 18.
Catholicism and the abrahamic religions never were a big part of my life even though I was steeped in the culture from birth and I quickly tore away from religion as I grew older as I saw them for what they are. Tools to keep people ignorant and in line.
Coming out to my mother at 35 took multiple drawn out and traumatizing conversations…. coming out to just about everyone else in my life felt natural and was almost a side note in a conversation about something else….
As a Southerner who has read the Bible (KJV, NLT, and Apologetics) the devil won when hate and judgement got into the church, especially capitalism. As a queer it pisses me off how egotistical parents can be.
Mad respect, I see it too.
We assumed places of worship could not be encroached by the VESTIGES of capital.
The places of worship will only be free. Once we are all free, no chains can be left bound!
Thank you for not making this anti-Christian. It’s so hard for me as a queer Christian to find not only Christians who are ok with me being queer, but also queer people who are ok with being Christian. I know that many queer people have been hurt by Christians and this causes them to distrust God, and it doesn’t feel good to be around people who have said negative things about something that is very important to me.
I went into this thinking you would be making it about them being Christian, but you made it about the root problem, them not loving their kids. So thank you for that. This is the first video I’ve watched from you, but you’ve already made me feel welcome.
Im dying inside because you picked Austin, which is like the most liberal city in Texas. 😂
PraegerU does that intentionally, they target their ads for queer and trans-positive channels. It's such a pain.
people shouldnt have children if theyre not going to support them through everything i s2g
As a Christian, I find it awfully interesting that the same God whose said His most important doctrine was "Love one another, as I have loved you" apparently also really cares about 1950s, American, middle class, white values
What does skin color have to do with it?
I've heard the "if this lifestyle were right this wouldn't be the result" before; it came from someone who claimed that the gay lifestyle fundamentally included risky behaviors, drugs, etc. (from their own observations). No thought at all that the roots of some of those behaviors might come from the way they were/are treated as LGBTQ+ people in their families and communities (in the midwest, in religious communities no less). Not a drop of nuance.
Yeah, as if straight cishet people never do drugs and participate in risky behaviour.
I wonder if that woman will ever know that you stole her face lol
Imagine someone seeing this comment without context.
My mind went straight to game of thrones 😂
@@reklessbravo2129 My first thought was Avatar: the last airbender.
The one who went back into the closet and then is complaining about hand holding doesn't actually get much sympathy from me. At a certain point your internalized homophobia becomes not only your own issue but something you weaponize to hurt others, as shown by this post. If you know how painful that type of rejection is and you inflict that upon your child then you're not a good parent.
The thing is, the same parents probably think Pascal's wager is still accurate. "If you believe in god and he doesn't exist, you lost nothing.", except a relationship with your children. You know that doesn't seem like nothing to me. Just say'n.
18:28 Unironically the "No hand holding before marriage!" stereotype 😭
Someone needs to show these parents the movie "Prayers For Bobby." It's about a Christian family who learns their son is gay, and has to come to terms with it.
Trigger warning: s**cide
Bobby offs himself, and his very homophobic mom (maybe the most homophobic member of their family) goes on a whole journey of soul searching as she tries to understand where her faith fits into everything...
And it's a true story, this *actually* happened to a family in I think the 70's, and Bobby's mom is the biggest ally now. The mom is played by Sigourney Weaver btw. It's such a good movie, I bawl every time.
Is it on Netflix or Amazon?
@@GachaAracne Amazon
I have family of half brotgers and sisters. One brother who i lost about six months ago. Him and his wife church twice a week loved their family unconditionally. About 8 years ago at Thanksgiving his wife asked her granddaughter, my wonderful niece why sge bever brings anyone to family dinners. She just blushed a little and said tgere was bo onw to bring. Her grandmother goes bull****, theres Millie. Our jaws just dropped as she continues to tell her "what, you didn't think we knew"? She gave her grandmother the biggest hug ever. My point. Even with a loving family its terrifying to come out. I cant imagine the hell these parents are putting their children through.
So I’m Trans and Christian. Most of my friends who are also Christian and part of the LGBTQ+ community told me that realizing that they were Queer actually brought them closer to God and it’s true for me too 🫶
I’m also a trans Christian :D. I had to completely leave the church, live as an atheist for a bit, and finally lose my fear of God in order to actually learn more about the scripture, because all the years before then, I was terrified of questioning anything cause I was told that that was apparently some hORRIBLE sin or whatever, so I never thought to look for answers. I learned that the original scripture is a lot more accepting than I had been taught, I was slowly pulled back in. Like, it felt like an actual physical tug or something.
Someday I want to study the original languages of scripture and make my own direct translation.
I love when I get PragerU ads on this channel.😂
I think one of them may be my mum. I recently stopped talking to a "firend" and told my mum he was homophobic and that I didn't want to see him anymore and my mum still hangs out with his mum. his mum is right next door too. my step-dad is a bit of a conservative and my mum doesn't really understand our community. bit of a long shot but it could be my mum. she's always on facebook group stuff.
idk why but the comment at 6:46 reminded me of when my mom (who’s trying her best) was asking me about about my trans sister and her gf at the time (also trans) and i when i explained that my sister does in fact identify as a lesbian her response was a very matter of fact “but they can’t scissor!” and i was so shocked 😭 like why is that the first thing she thought of 😭😭
edit to add: she didn’t say it in a “but they can’t scissor how can they be lesbians??” way but in a “yes. they are lesbians. but they cannot scissor and that’s just how it is.” way lmaoo
I didn't realise orientation was based on the positions you and partner(s) could get into in the bedroom (joke)!
These parent groups seem like a really bad things, letting bigots find a community to tell them that their bigotry is okay.
Water finds its own level, fortunately some of them are capable of changing, too.
U mean like this RUclipsrs echo chamber, like those religious parents she bigoted and a loser
“Pumpkin sausage” is the CUTEST nickname a mom could give haha omg
i'm endlessly grateful that i went no contact with my mother without ever coming out to her, cause she would have made it about her, like she does with everything
The fact that group exists on Facebook is a total yikes but on the otherhand, it is Facebook so I'm not surprised its now turned into a place where Karens can be racist and biggoted
If the group existed to help parents un-learn bigotry, that would be great, but it is uhhh.... not that.
The one at 15:49 is insane to me. You don't want your kid to be happy? Wtf, why have kids
Also, I came out to my parents, and they were chill and invited my partner and I on a cruise w/ them. We held hands on the cruise, and my father tore our hands apart and told us he didn't need the whole damn world knowing I was a lesbian. We avoided them for the rest of the week-long cruise, and I went no contact for 3 years until they got their act together and apologized for going too fast and not taking time to properly process and educate themselves. We're in a better place now, 8 years later, but I don't think I'll ever forget that.
The crazy thing is my “agnostic” mom managed to become even more transphobic than this from Facebook groups without ANY religious influence. Highly recommend investigating more of these parent groups because they are a big problem.
I can’t get over the plushies falling over in the background
GOD GIVING Y'ALL AN LGBT CHILD IS NOT A "PUNISHMENT", IT'S A LESSON IN FUCKING LOVE PEOPLE HOLY SHIT
and also, no, god doesn't make mistakes. if your child tells you their trans/nonbinary/genderfluid GOD GAVE YOU THAT BEAUTIFUL BUTTERFLY OF A CHILD
The post about the son cutting of connections due to bigotry putting strain on their relationships seems fine to me. Sounds like they are supporting their son in life and doing what they can for them regardless of the effects its having on them. They said that they are just venting about the aquwardness it causes with their own support network, and by doing it here, they aren't making it their sons problem. Yes, the post was all about them, they were venting, releasing preassure. Getting it out so they could focus on their sons wellbeing. At least that was the read I got from it.
Facebook is now a mix of boomer memes, bigotry, and for some reason, adult content 😭
I use it for theater purposes, and if I don’t sign on for a week I get FLOODED with recommendations of women in bikinis, hate, etc etc, I was so confused.
I was away from fb for about 18 moths because I locked myselfnout of my account.i missed when things shifted and my poor mum (in her 70s) kept complaining about these people posting on her page (she's been on fb 10 years and still can't grasp that people post on their own pages and you see it if you are their friends). It turned out to be a bunch of things like gossip posts, stuff like "Royals UK", "William & Kate", mixed with competitions for motor homes and stuff. I told her she must have liked their pages or followed them. It was only when I got back in my account that I discovered while I had been off it, it had turned into quite the hellscape of (adlutish) adverts, paid content, and scams.
And when I do see posts from people I'm friends with, it's like every 3rd post or something. And those friends posts don't even show in any kind of chronological order...I'll get a post from a week ago then one from 3 hours ago, then one from 3 days ago, then a month ago...same person, all out of order on my feed and interspersed with dodgy ads & gossipy crap like you would see in a tabloid.
If it wasn't my only connection with old uni friends and distant relatives then I'd probably ditch it completely.
And Star Trek memes. And cats. Both worth hanging around for.
It's crazy how the boomers and disinformation spreaders took over facebook
Don't forget about MLMs (not the gay kind)
These parents don't actually love their kids; they love the concept of what they think their kids should be
My entire family treats my name change as though it's a huge burden *on them*. I'm not trans, but I had to change my name in 2018, which was a long time coming because I've had debilitating name dysphoria for as long as I can remember. I tried to make that change as convenient as I possibly could by using my middle name, which I'd already been using since I was a little kid with unrestricted access to the Internet - and as such, most people my age who knew me knew about, since we were all on Facebook or Instagram at the time. No one really cared about my attempt, though, and I have had a lot of difficulty in getting people to accept that I'd changed my name. To this day, my family largely deadnames me except for a very few exceptions. My mom, who is the closest person to me, has made a lot of strides and has long stopped deadnaming me in public (it still comes out by accident - which I understand is just an accident - but it's been 6 years so I'd really like it to happen less and less), but she has tried to argue in the past that I should be understanding that it's difficult for her.
I understand that changing your habits is a challenge in and of itself. However, I shouldn't have to fight as much as I did to be called a name that I'd already been using almost my entire life, by people who claim to care about my feelings. I shouldn't have been as invalidated as I have been over the years. But your family will always tend to think that it's about them and their feelings - it's like you belong to them, even if you're not close, rather than you are your own individual.
I feel like that's exactly what would happen if I tried to change my name because it was my dad's name and his great uncles name and like I would rather not still have financial identity verification issues all the time because of this guys c'mon.
@@FalcodrinFor context, this is about my first name. But I understand that choosing to change (or even keep!) your last name can be a messy story too...
Edit: I just realised you might have been talking about your first name too. My family also has a tradition of giving the first son the name of his father, which also comes with its own politics.
@@jadziajan that's such an annoying tradition. My family thinks it's a way of honoring each other but like just let your kids be unique (maybe not to the point of some modern names)
Mom and dad: sweetie please dont put us in a home we want to live on our own"
daugter/son/ofspring: "I don't approve of that lifestyle"
The parent who can't figure out what presents to buy their daughter is so stupid. The kid has an apartment. Buy her a tool kit, kitchen stuff, nice bath towels. Any of these would say ' I want you to be comfortable and able to take care of yourself." That's how you show love. Why make it so complicated?!
Why can't the "strong independent woman" buy her own things?
@@chris135x Parents buy presents for their kids.
OMG GIRL WHERE DID YOU GET THAT SHIRT?!?
Ugh yeah this hit, my parents, two non-Christian who are generally accepting, told me that me asking them to say daughter or kid instead of son was the “hardest thing I could have ever asked them to do” like straight up direct quote I have it in writing and ugh
Wild to see parents pretend to have compassion while actively being the reason for their children’s struggles. I’m catholic, and call me crazy but this behavior is revolting to me as a Christian. Jesus taught us to love, to accept, and to give of ourselves. people who weaponize his teachings and use their religion as justification for their own internalized hatred are only destroying their own relationship with God.
"Learn to live with what god gave you..." And then they proceed to (TW: SURGERY AND TRANSPHOBIA)
Performing surgeries on intersex BABIES. BABIES. Make it make sense, please. I'm a trans dude who follows Christ, and you can definitely come to terms with all of that. I've tried to repress it. I've tried to stick to the values I've been taught. But it doesn't work. You have to embrace every aspect of you. PLEASE... take care of yourselves. I wish you all the best ❤
Trans was(and still isn’t) in the Bible, gay was only added in the last century or so in passages about p3dophilia(not saying they’re the same, but someone decided being gay was a problem and not the other)
Exactly! If God doesn't make mistakes, how is that not one? Science proves the existence of both, and I do believe that there is a connection between science and god. I'm not saying this to offend anyone, just expressing my personal opinion. Yeah, they definitely are not the same. Especially given how some people who call themselves Christians act...@@jariahymn3028
That, and circumcision for non-medical reasons.
i think the xmas mom is mine mom
Sorry to hear
I’m really sorry to hear that :(
I hope things turn around for you and that your relationship with her improves and she becomes more accepting
@@fionafiona1146 thanks
I’m sorry about that, ml
💗
I feel like all the anti lgbt or transphobic or bigots (especially mothers) need to hear and understand this quote from Princess Bubblegum: People get built different. We don’t need to figure it out. We just need to respect it.
There is no hate like Christian love.
6:43 my mom gets so confused about nonbindary people lol she says that "there's too many people" because the pronouns they/them can often refer to multiple people lmao it's ridiculous
I know I’m late here, but I honestly wouldn’t be surprised to find out that my mother is in one of these groups. These posts remind me a lot of my (rather cold) relationship with her. I came out as trans to my parents, but they haven’t even showed the slightest interest in actually getting to know the real me, so I just don’t give them the chance to do so.
Also I admitted that I didn’t believe in God at the same time, which probably upset my parents even more than me being trans, which is saying something.
My adoptive mum got huffy with me when I told her I didn't share her religious beliefs (that she and a-grandmother were trying to force on me as a teenager). I'm not LGBTQ, but I suspect she would have been upset somehow if I also had been a lesbian or something.
Off topic , as a STAY , I immediately noticed your Dwaekki doll in the background >>>>
These parents fail to realize that loving your neighbor and treating people the way we want to be treated is our primary instruction from Jesus…homophobia and all these parents are completely missing the mark and when you research historical bible’s homosexuality isn’t in the Bible.
I think God may well answer her prayer that her child will be transformed completely by God…but not in the way she wants. Seems like her child may well become the woman she has always known herself to be. This is a blessing, and a gift from God. The mother did her best to quash God’s gift to her of a daughter, and she did all she could to make sure she had a son…but God is stronger than the will of people. I rejoice that this woman managed to find a supportive wife to help her become herself.❤️
(When one believes God has a plan which is not necessarily the same as our plan, one must accept that their children, who they have always thought of as a blessing, are part of that plan. If these self proclaimed Christians cannot see that a child being a member of the LGBTQ+ community in any way? Well, I find it difficult NOT to question their faith.)
9:10 In the words of Velvette (Hazbin Hotel); "You've got it twisted, I'm not the one who needs a new attitude"
u should use this person doesn’t exist next time for a pfp
Good advice, especially when it isn't searchable as stock footage
I doubt Facebook moms are gonna reverse image search anyway
As someone who grew up around super religious people they often dont do nicknames for kids either. They take that as an insult. Even something like saying matt instead of Matthew. Doesnt surprise me they cant handle a full name change for transpeople
They say happiness is fleeting or just a feeling or whatever, but then they wonder why their child is suic*dal and blame it on their 'lifestyle'. Like, why are they missing the connection??
W homophobia
W transphobia
@@robin-hr7tc Wow you're so "cool" and "edgy" for saying that Robin.
@@heronekineko5386 yes we do cause cause i "hate" those "creatures"
I have a negative amount of empathy for these parents. So insanely narcissistic ppl almost unfathomable.
Prayer is the ultimate "I want to speak to the manager", it's all weak ppl whining bc they don't get what they want.
Did nobody see the bunny cuddling up to the duck??
I’m a closeted pan and I’m wondering if this is how my parents will be
I came out to one of my brothers and he makes a lot of “frying pan” jokes whenever the topic comes up when we’re alone. All of my brothers were making fun of it the other day, and I’m not out to them. We get along for the most part but moments like those are just… eugh.
As a trans pan sister, I gotchu
I'm only out as trans in my house, and my parents - specifically my fatger - despise me for that
I feel you ❤
Stay strong and keep being the best you
💗💙💛
P.S. have you told your siblings that you don't like those jokes? In my experience with cishet friends they often make jokes to try and relate to you, if they actually love you they'll stop when ask or explain their thinking ❤
As a fellow pan I would recommend maybe somehow try and figure out how your parents feel about these kinds of things and if they seem accepting then wait maybe a day or two and then come out (of course that doesn’t always mean they would be accepting unfortunately) and if they don’t seem accepting then I’m very sorry. I can say that if you are able to come out you’re probably going to have to explain what that means and that can be a pain.
@@JosilyneTwigg only one of my brothers knows I’m pan, I don’t know if he’s told the rest or if it just came to mind. He doesn’t usually take me very seriously and doesn’t stop doing things when I ask him to, the others might be more considerate though. (But I still don’t know if they know… so that’s also a problem…)
@@JosilyneTwigg I think it's a mixed bag - in my own experience, people use jokes like that to be mean and telling them you don't like it made them do it more. But you're right, some people do joke to relate to others and it's fine when both people enjoy it.
Isn’t pan the same as bi
“Pumpkin Sausage” such a stinking cute little nickname
you should slowly convert them into allies by convincing them it's a trial from god to see whether they are able to accept a child their god gave them to see how strong their faith is and if they can overcome this to prove they will always accept the will of god or whatever
Can we just take a moment to appreciate earnings that can transform from face to pug to egg to toast in any possible order?
I'm completely straight and I wouldn't hang out with a homophobic 'friend'.
Depends if it just nice banta then people should be fine since not everything is homephobic at heart
This is why I’m kind of happy my parents are no longer around, I knew I was bi when they were, but explaining enby to them? FFS my mum was shocked when I wasn’t surprised when my great uncles got married as they were ‘friends who lived together’. Even as a kid I picked up on the vibes, and cliche as much they both worked in theatre, also Uncle John was camper than a row of tents.
What really blows me way is the fact they have the capacity to accept an all powerful god with a mysterious holy plan for us all that mortals can't understand but aren't willing to accept and love their children for who they are despite also not understanding them.
They can suspend their disbelief for a religion or god but not for the sake of their own child?!
The thing I don’t get is even if u don’t necessarily love them half of these people’s arguments for why everyone should have one is “what about when you’re old? Who’ll take care of you?”
Like, if that’s the whole reason behind having children…why would you care about their pronouns, sexuality, gender, etc? You’re just ruining the very purpose you had them for..
Not you using my first name to go undercover as a white Christian woman 😭
Seriously, this shit is why I am so glad I abandoned my religion at 14.
20:40 I have the theory that if you think you were "converted back to being straight" that you are actually bisexual and think that because you like men (as a guy) and choose to date and marry a woman and like her too, then you're "cured" of your homosexuality when in reality you're still bisexual you just have a happy relationship with the opposite gender and don't date someone of the same gender... They think that conversion therapy works BECAUSE they are happy in a "straight relationship" so now they're straight, when he's still bisexual, he's just not dating or married to someone of the same gender
15:04 This “terrible, awful” movement that has helped save lives and help people be themselves, making sure that those who fall under the category of “transgender” don’t feel burdensome because they’re not excepted. It’s almost like they’re human beings who want to be treated as such by the people who cause them harm.
Normally, I can block out these kinds of people but somedays it hurts so bad.
Your hair is so cool
Personal opinion but I think it’s ugly, probs why she gets dissed by everyone who don’t buy her bullshit
That’s terrible. Never trust clown hair
17:50 literally just realized the title doesn't say "bigTOED" 😢
Most of these people seem like parents who just found out and are trying to understand and learn to accept it . I don't think that just because they are asking advice and venting in a group of people with similar situations means they are trying to to make it all about them or that they only care about themselves and not thier kid
"I need you to start letting me live my life, to play basketball and to hang out with my friends, to stay out too late and make mistakes. I know you're scared, and I'm sorry it's so scary being parents of a trans kid. But you've got to get over it, because your fear is not my responsibility. Thank you for letting me be myself." - Gia, Quantum Leap Season 1 Episode 12, "Let Them Play"
This makes me cringe so hard. I'm a Christian and an ally. I'm so so so sorry for the harm coming from my fellow believers. I believe you are the way you were created to be, and are loved by God no matter what anyone else says. You are wonderful and unique human beings.
Great video. It’s crazy to see what the other side thinks.
?
I didn't watch this intro like 15 times because it makes me feel so freaking valid, no you did-
29:53 not only that, he knows the Bible inside and out, which is why he knows there’s nothing wrong with being trans!!!!
As someone who’s been in “the church” I translate the phrasing as less “I’m being punished by God” and more, “my child’s sexuality is somehow my cross to bear, its how I’m being tested by God/ tempted by the devil to give into sin/ being politically liberal” bc that’s somehow synonymous
It’s so funny, they call us snowflakes and over sensitive and such but it’s really them getting so bent out of shape 😂 Let us exist
I love that shirt so much
Idk about the mom who feels she cant see her best friend, sounds like she doesn't have anywhere to vent or anyone to vent to except for this group. She should find a better group but she also has feelings she needs to process.
Parents don't cease to have inconvenient human emotions when they have children. Why are parents expected to be perfect, repress their feelings, and just be smiling and encouraging?
I tried to do that, unconditionally affirming my friends and family, never addressing my own feelings and needs. Never actually confronting them. It nearly killed me.
So yeah.
It's not so much that parents are expected to be 'perfect', but 'accepting' of their children, because they made the choice to have them and nobody consents to being conceived/born, but most people do better with supportive, loving and accepting parents.
It's OK to still have those complicated feelings, and maybe to have conversations with your children about them as long as it's with the aim of finding mutual understanding, not to express disappointment that they didn't turn out to be the people you wanted.
Except "supportive and loving and accepting," the way you've defined it, that is 'perfect.'
No one wants to explain anything, that's a huge burden on the person explaining, emotional and otherwise. Parents who are uncertain CAN'T communicate this, even slightly, to their children - I just have to look at the comments to see people eviscerating parents who dare to express even the slightest bit of uncertainty or frustration. At best, people are just tolerant of the "ignorant people" they have to be related to.
So no. You CAN'T communicate to the people you are supporting - as a supportive person, your job is to shut up and smile and support completely. Anything else would hurt the person you are supporting. No questions really asked, because that would go against complete and total acceptance and trigger them - certainly not if you are asking real questions anyway.
And before you say "People aren't that delicate," again, comments in and on this very video say otherwise. People coming out are in a vulnerable state, at a vulnerable time, and it's clear that even the slightest human flaw from the person that they turn to for support will hurt them.
There is nowhere for parents to safely process feelings of disappointment, confusion, frustration, or any sort of discordance (like 'I just cannot associate my love for you with this new name') because, from the moment their child comes out to them as LGBTQ+ of any sort, they aren't allowed to have any feelings whatsoever. Doing the research, even and ESPECIALLY with the advocacy groups, says pretty much the very things that I have said here.
Hence Stepford parents.
If parents have to be superhuman, that's an unreasonable expectation. Mothers are already held to an immensely high bar, with a gendered double standard already in play. See, this one can't even be upset about not being able to see her friend so often without getting jumped. As she was in this video, where she is called selfish for posting to probably the only support group she could find. Since, you know, she can't really talk to her best friend anymore.
I do note, I'm not speaking as a parent, but the same is true for friends and allies.
@@ShintogaDeathAngel
I'm keeping my post up, but I shouldn't have replied so aggressively to a comment that was only intending to help. I'm sorry. @@ShintogaDeathAngel
Thank you! You don't have to understand your queer kid, y'all. You just have to love and respect them.
Could definitely see my mother in a group like this
Young doesn’t mean stupid