@@zacka161 Oh, my dear human.….I imagine you feel this way because you skipped past a word I typed (“overall”). My comment was made with clear understanding that there’s nuance within each situation.
Right?? The girl who said that she doesn't consider it cheating when it's done intentionally drove me crazy lol. People are assholes and will not admit they're in the wrong when they actually are. What a bitch.
It seemed for this specific persons experience she was interfering that it was non-consensual… non-consensual = r@pe A similar thing happened to a family member in high school with their “best friend”. Family member and high school sweet heart broke up, but quickly got back together and have been together for 30 years.
It's such a shitty excuse fr. Like what would hurt more telling someone you want to break up with them or them learning you cheated on them. The obvious answer to cause the least hurt is just breaking up with them.
It's not logical. But not all humans can be logical at all times. I have done things out of pure emotion, it was not pretty. Still not okay to cheat, period.
@@ant__ant_ant If you’re in a relationship where trying to leave or break up the relationship might put you in physical danger, or at risk of losing your life. That’s the only legitimate reason I can think of where cheating is morally justified. Not to put it out there for people to use as a made up excuse when they want to cheat. If you want to mess around with others beyond the boundaries of your relationship, break it off first, or course. Anything else is cowardly and unjustifiable, even if it’s for revenge or whatever else excuse people use. But actual abusive relationships where your exit routes are fundamentally cut off for you, that is the one exception.
@@ZefParisoto how was he not proud when he smiled like that lmao. he was shameless about it not honest. he really thought that was a valid justification.
i understood her in a very different way. she could be saying that she was drinking with a trusted friend and when they kissed her, she did not have the right mind to pull away or set boundaries. If the kiss was not her idea, there is actually such a thing like "too drunk to consent" and she should not be shamed for a situation she did not want to have.
@@XHydroYGenZ technically yes. That's why in gym culture, there's a concept of "cheat days" when you deviate from your prescribed diet and eat whatever the fuck you want on these days.
"they weren't paying me enough attention." GIRL JUST BREAK UP 💀💀💀if you thought of being with another person while in a relationship, you guys are already over
@@BillHicks420 It really is that simple, and if you cant confide in your partner about insecurities like these - then truly, you gotta work on yourself first as well. Kinda crazy that common sense hops out the wazoo with some of these people though
@@Skyflairl2p Yeah, I think it also boils down to expectations and maturity. Adult relationships require work, dedication and communication. You can't break up with someone over small and workable things - you'll never be able to settle down with someone.
@@Skyflairl2p that's not really true though, I mean sometimes you'll talk to them about it and they won't listen, so it's better to just go to other routes
That girl is so damn beautiful. If I was dating her I swear I wouldn’t cheat, why would you ruin having her in your life. She has the looks, is a sweet heart, and seem chill af. She is picking insane men if she is getting cheated on. Just my 2 cents
I believe cheating should be established early on and shouldn't be just an assumption. As the one woman said micro cheating is following too many girls on social media. I would not consider that cheating, but if she clarified it beforehand and that is their boundaries for THEIR relationship and it was agreed upon, then it'd be consider cheating for them. The question "is it okay to ever cheat?". Is there any edge cases where it would be? Genuinely curious.
I made a separate comment on this but tell me what you think, because i know i get this a bit on Grindr (I'm not comfortable with it so i don't take part in it but its morally confusing to me.) but basically, old gay guys who married to fit in before homosexually became more accepted within society but have now committed to a 20+ year relationship and want a good upbringing for their children and still love their wife. Is it ok or do they tell their wife and risk the kid's growing up with divorced parents?
@Aaron I actually commented on your post too! I don't think it is okay for the husband to continue lying to their wife. They need to create and establish a new relationship to create a more fulfilling life. Divorced parents is not ideal by any means, but neither is lying, sneaking about, and hiding your true self. Co parenting is very possible, not ideal I am sure, but much more appropriate than cheating and everyone can create healthy boundaries. I am sure it is way more noticeable than they think it is and how much it affects their family.
I agree, I also wouldnt have considered following people cheating but if thats established and someone does that, yeah its cheating, you crossed the boundary you agreed to. I don’t think you should ever ASSUME certain boundaries, but at the same time I think a lot of times people KNOW they are cheating even if their partner didn’t explicitly state what they are doing as cheating. Like you going out to dinner every week with a co worker one on one outside of work not involving work and you don’t tell your partner and you HIDE it, even if nothing “happens” and its not against what you discussed as cheating, that still is cheating because you are hiding it because you know your partner wouldn’t like it and that intentional deceit is a form of cheating. People tend to know when they are doing something they shouldn’t be even if they are not breaking a “rule”. If you are thinking about it and having to justify it to yourself why its ok and why its “technically” allowed, you are already probably crossing some line, your justifiable actions shouldnt need a loop hole to be ok
I think an edge case would be one mentioned in the video where there’s abuse. I think people underestimate/downplay the toll that abuse can have whether it’s mental or physical. People say just leave that person but it’s not always that simple, and can even put your life in danger if they know you’re trying to leave. That being said, I personally don’t believe victims should be forced to live their lives void of intimacy and connection because they’re stuck in circumstances out of their control. An effort should be made to leave and get to a safe place, but until then I can understand why one would cheat and would go so far as to say it’s okay given that their partner isn’t showing actions of caring for their humanity themselves. Edit: Also wanted to add I 100% agree the terms should be discussed beforehand. I hate “cheating is cheating” because as you stated, that’s different depending on the person. I define cheating as “being intimate with another person in ways that cross the boundaries of your relationship.” This way, the boundaries themselves can be determined by the people in the relationship and they’re not just assumed.
@Bubby707 I completely agree! I think there is situations that can come up that the 2 partners have not established any boundaries on yet. That's when a discussion should be had to discuss what the other person's perspective on it is! Example: if I partner was offered to go get coffee with a coworker at his new job, and he said yes. Maybe he didn't get the chance to discuss it prior and made the decision he made then spoke about it with his partner. Come to find out the partner considered that cheating and is NOT comfortable with it. He didn't cheat since it was not established but if he did it again, it would be considered cheating ^this example to me is on the extreme side. I don't think people should be controlling their partners this way. BUT I do understand some people find this appropriate and that's how they might operate their relationship.
These be the type to accuse someone of r*** because they were too “drunk” to consent. You cheated. Take accountability. Be careful you guys! Her logic is dangerous! 1:24
This is not to the women/men who have really been taken advantage of in these types of situations. This is to the women/men who try to absolve themselves of accountability because they don’t want to lose their boyfriend/girlfriend, be looked at in a certain way, or just regret their decision.
Of course the man doesn't know anything about consent, especially under the influence. I'm sure we'll see your name in the court system for sexual assault one day, since your logic is that all drunken girls can consent.
@@DA-js7xzWhy is all responsibility on the man? Don’t get so drunk you black out. If a drunken girl is immune from liability of poor decisions of consent, than a drunken boy is also immune from their poor drunken decisions also. Both are responsible. Not one. Many ppl regret past sexual partners, but you can’t say you were raped bc you said yes but regretted it. We must accept responsibility for our behavior.
The only times it's "okay" or "not that bad" is when your partner is abusive and you are afraid of leaving. But honestly at that point he relationship is no longer considered a relationship and more of a hostage situation.
But I feel like that would make things worse wouldn’t it? Imagine you cheat on an abusive partner . I’d imagine you’d carry some sort of guilt and anxiety about both your partner finding out and just general morality. And think if your partner did find out than your safety is completely gone and things could get even more destructive. Sure it’s justifiable to cheat in a scenario like that but in the grand scheme of things it could put you in much more complicated and dangerous scenario
@lmao Sorry not sorry but it's still not okay. Like is it that important to get laid that while in an abusive relationship instead of planning to get out safely you'd rather find someone else and then depend on that person to get out? They can count on family, on friends and if they have none there's special numbers to call for people in abusive relationship that could help with an attorney.
@lmao But cheating and leaving with someone else could literally still cause an abusive ex to still harass, stalk and harm you since you’re betraying their “trust” in warped minds. Cheating could make scenarios like that even more likely and worse for you and the person you cheated with IMO
@lmao me writing a lot doesn't mean i'm "mad". I wrote that to inform people that cheating on an abuser might not be the best idea out there, that's all.
Is it even cheating at that point? Like imo, if you're in a relationship - and it turns abusive.. Is that really a relationship anymore? I dont consider that to be true, its a hostage situation at most. You cheat on someone who loves you, even a little. But the second violence is part of the "partnership" its.. well, hardly much love left if im honest.
EXACTLY! Because they’re not sorry they cheated, they’re just sorry they were caught. What cheaters say behind their partners’ backs after said partners take them back-is sickening. There is no respect or constant fear of revenge-cheating and of course broken trust.
You don't get to have an opinion on other people's relationships. There are valid reasons to do so and the people who chose to stay should not be judge by people who know nothing about the situation.
Most people cheat. Of course it's easy to say "I'd never ever forgive that, so horrible!" but in the end, when you're already in that situation and you're in each other's lives, it's different.
@@May04bwunope 😅 Other like you, some of us are full of self confidence, love and pride. And we know for a fact that were 2 Good 2 settle For a lying, deceitful chicken coward.... If you deserve the bare minimum, then just say that, but I've been in that situation. Engaged a month before marriage and I walked away and I have 0 regrets.!!!!! Stay up
honestly, I think it's probably because they've cheated themselves and would want to be forgiven. Or just an extremely low sense of self worth. Accepting cheating in a relationship is NOT normal. Let's not normalize it.
My ex husband was actively trying to have sex with a girl much younger than him who was a friend of his little sister. She was a young mother and he told her what an amazing mom she is and how sexy she is meanwhile I was at home with our 2 month old. He claims he didn’t cheat because they didn’t physically have sex. Absolutely crazy to me for him to think that lol. Getting cheated on is absolutely shattering. I’m glad the general consensus is that cheating doesn’t always mean sex!
Nah, it’s never okay to cheat. I might be the bad guy here but I’ve dumped people over the mental realization that I’m attracted or fantasizing about someone else. That was enough for me to be like I need to be single. Sure they might feel blindsided at me just up and leaving but it’s better that way then betraying their trust and lying to them by cheating.
Nah, personally I’ve experienced both and I gotta say both hurt just as bad. Being ghosted with no explanation is even worse though because you’re left there with so many questions
I think it’s ok to experience attraction whilst in a relationship- like we’re only human ?? People experience attraction but the most important thing is that if you’re in a committed relationship, you don’t act on it( in regards to monogamy- ppl have different rules) overall it’s just about respecting your partner and communicating
Cheating is wrong. Shows the person’s lack of moral and lack of care towards you. Move on. Better to be single than be with some one who will disrespect you. I dumped someone who cheated on me. His excuse was, “well, it wasn’t like I was trying to replace you.” That’s one of the reasons people cheat, not to replace but to have fun while knowing you’re their stable person at home.
“That’s one of the reasons people cheat, not to replace but to have fun while knowing you’re their stable person at home.“ SO TRUE!!!! That’s the fact of the matter and it’s why you should never stay with a cheater.
The only time I excuse cheating is education and I'm talking about tests and stuff! ESPECIALLY if the teacher does a terrible job at teaching or actually doesn't teach at all! I would've agreed with you on all levels but high school made me run into some really "iffy" teachers
This video perfectly shows why you can't just have a generic, one-size-fits-all definition of cheating, and why each couple is different and needs to have that discussion early on. For example, "micro-cheating" may be a limit for some couples (such as the one gal saying its not okay to follow to many girls on instagram). But for other couples, such as me and my wife, even casual flirting is 100% okay because the intent isn't to actually take that other person home. As always, communication is key.
You make a strong point. Also, couples could talk early on about being swingers. Seen my friends, who are a swingers couple, and they discuss what is and isn’t allowed. Before they do anything they ask the other if they can. If they say yes, then cool. If they say no, then that’s that.
Not really, if you did something, and you kept it from your partner. And you know that they wouldn't like it. And you know that you wouldn't like it done to you is pretty basic knowledge. You learn that with making friends. So there's no excuse, you just like playing Stupid, or you are stupid, probably both😅.in The history of books of cheating 100% Of the time the person knew what they were doing was wrong, which is why they always fail to mention it to their partner. If you're that dumb, don't date, it's not a necessary in life.
Interesting. I noticed that most of the women cheaters justified it by saying they felt trapped in their relationships, but the men cheaters were like “yeah I just felt like it”.
Reasons may vary from person to person you know,it doesnt really justify anything from the woman's side. Its a commitment thing. Women cheating tend to blame the man for no reason most of the times. Men cheaters just act like nothing happened because they crave that sexual dopamine and its very impulsive. Both things are equally worse. Blaming your partner or feeling like nothing happened.
@@amukbir8777yes this, finally someone said it. I’m tired of seeing one gender justifying their reasons, saying “men can’t go their whole life only loving one woman, it’s their biology.” Or, women saying vice versa, whether it had to do with their self esteem or not. Both are equally as bad, and I hate the fact society tries to downplay one side
1:30. I hate this girl She's not only cheats, but then states "oh I wasn't even consenting" so how am I in the wrong? Alcohol is not an excuse, and beyond that you can't literally say you live in some fairy land world when drunk.. where reality doesn't still apply
your take is very unscientific alcohol affects the hippocampus (memory center), which is why we black out; the motor cortex, which is why we stumble; and the prefrontal cortex. the part of the brain most responsible for reasoning and judgment, It does not simply tear down our inhibitions and let loose dormant desires. It is an active chemical process, counter-intuitively fitting the definitions of “stimulant” and “depressant.” It changes nearly every part of our brain. Since our brain is who we are, alcohol does not simply let out our true, unchanged selves. It changes who we are. Alcohol makes us happy, woozy, enthusiastic, gregarious, and loud. In some cases, an affable friend may become a mean drunk. It is a complicated drug with all sorts of good and bad effects. But it does not make us genuine. It just makes us dumb.
Cheating is good. Cheating should be done worldwide. It's good to cheat on your partner and break her heart and make her feel like a piece of shit (I'm joking).
What if that's the thing - what if you don't have that empathy thing but you know cheating is wrong, would like to not, but it doesn't register because you do lack empathy?
Cheating is never ok. That sick feeling and pain in the chest when you find out, suddenly your world just falls apart. You’ll never forget that feeling 💔
I cheated and learned from it. And I’m a 25 year old male. Would never cheat again and would take it back if I could. One of the biggest lessons you learn as a young man.
It sounded like in this case she could have been taken advantage of. If someone is too intoxicated to consent, no one needs to be trying to hook up with them. That’s creepy!!
@@suhashareef6275 That's wrong imo. He's not recognising the impact he has and role he plays in disrespecting other people. That's selfishness and immaturity imo.
alcohol affects the hippocampus (memory center), which is why we black out; the motor cortex, which is why we stumble; and the prefrontal cortex. the part of the brain most responsible for reasoning and judgment, It does not simply tear down our inhibitions and let loose dormant desires. It is an active chemical process, counter-intuitively fitting the definitions of “stimulant” and “depressant.” It changes nearly every part of our brain. Since our brain is who we are, alcohol does not simply let out our true, unchanged selves. It changes who we are. Alcohol makes us happy, woozy, enthusiastic, gregarious, and loud. In some cases, an affable friend may become a mean drunk. It is a complicated drug with all sorts of good and bad effects. But it does not make us genuine. It just makes us dumb.
For those that rather cheat than just tell your partner you don’t want to be with them. Just tell them you don’t want to be in the relationship anymore rather than cheat because getting cheated on is scaring and hurts way worst.
But if you successfully cheat and they never know, it can be quite a fun and exhilarating experience while also having a loyal partner. Not everyone has morals.
There are few things more painful than finding out the person you trust the most in the world, the person you think has your back, the person you love more than anyone else cheats on you. It is never okay.
"I'm just a simple man." Yeah, ok, if you want to sleep with a lot of people, that's completely fine, but then don't get into a relationship. Cause if simple men cheat, I don't want a simple man.
For those who see it as a very easy question not worth asking, consider this. A problem highlighted by many of these answers is that different people have different definitions of cheating, and different expectations for their partners. Often people enter into relationships assuming they are on the same page about what is acceptable. Sometimes you can clear up all the confusion by talking things out early on, and sometimes you realize down the line after making mistakes that the best option for you is to re-establish the terms of your relationship and the promises you are making to each other. Nothing wrong with setting a zero tolerance boundary against cheating, far from it. But that's not for everyone, and it doesn't even mean the same thing to everyone.
Learn the difference between a monogamous and a polygamous relationship. You set boundaries when you first start the relationship to know if you’re on the same page; should be common sense but it sadly isn’t to many. This comment doesn’t make sense since you’re not referring to different relationship types, since you’re making up your own random opinion as if relationships don’t have structures and rules in the first place.
@@aus-li Relationship "types" are just generalizations. Labels like monogamous and polyamorous are useful shorthands, but partners can still have different understandings of what they mean and what's against the rules. Every relationship is a little bit unique and it's useful to discuss boundaries more specifically.
@@HenryZhaosTextbook I mean, those are the most common types, unless it gets into asexual or the hookup culture. And that’s what I mean, that the best strategy is to talk about what you’re looking for in a relationship, or if you’re looking for a friend that’ll eventually turn into a relationship.
@@HenryZhaosTextbookI dont get how someone in a monogamous relationship can be okay with cheating, this video isn't about what is considered cheating, it's starting from the point that the cheating was taken place and if there is a justification. So I don't get te point? Cheating can be different from couple to couple, but this video isn't about that.
This guy cheated on me and wanted me back. I had him sit on my couch and tell me every detail about it while he cried his pathetic eyes out. He thought he would win me over but I kicked his blubbering arse out the door. It was so unbelievably satisfying.
Highly disagree with that because that partner could be highly abusive and toxic and could abuse you in so many different ways that leaves you traumatized for the rest of your life. There's also abusive relaionships where you cannot leave in fear of that person tracking you down and killing you
@@zaksharman True, but if your so scared that this person is gonna hurt you or something, why cheat? If they find out they will get even more angry, mad, and sad. Cheating hurts someone a lot. So if your scared they are gonns hurt you and you cheat? If they find out they are gonna hurt you even more. It's better to get out of there and then find someone else instead of finding someone else while with someone even if they are toxic/abusive
@@Tomboysksksk To me they would hurt you just as badly regardless of wether cheating occured or not. I know mutiple girls that were abused by a former partner that badly to the point where all of them cheated on him because that was the only way they could finally escape the hell they had been put through for years
There are tons of psychological studies that show how cheating negatively effects both people, unless you’re trapped in an abusive relationship there is zero justification for cheating.
I haven't cheated on a single girl that I've dated. Even if I no longer have any feelings for her, I'm still degrading myself by lying and going back on my word. All the breakups have been civil as well, sat down and discussed why I felt we were just not working together anymore, or vice versa. None of that ghosting/blocking/etc crap that is so popular these days.
The lady at 4:59 has given out red Flags in like 3 different videos lmao, she has 3 kids with 3 different Men, got super defensive in the guess the body count video, has cheated and is now saying its okay to cheat? She does have crazy eyes
4:55 At that point your objective shouldn't be to get into another relationship, it should be to get out of the one you are currently in. Looking for emotional support to help you deal with or get out of a bad situation is one thing, but it's another thing to go and look for a romantic relationship to get out of the one you are currently in. It's like trying to pay off debt with more debt.
Cheating happens in both monogamous and polyamorous relationships so just be very clear and communicative about what you and the other party want prior committing to avoid reaching point cheat and breakup.
I was in a long distance relationship for 2 years. Never cheated but my boyfriend, at the time, and I talked about opening the relationship while we were long distance. The plan was to have multiple partners but then go back to being monogamous when we move in together. In the end, we didn’t pursue multiple partners. We broke up. Would have had to hold it together for another 2 years and I couldn’t do it. Either way, neither of us cheated. Long distance is NOT an excuse to cheat.
advice to everyone--> if someone cheats on you... grab your bags and leave period. and don't look back. yea yea its hard blah blah. easier said than done blah blah --> leave anyways. I promise you that you'll figure something out and you'll find someone who respects you and loves you more than that person ever has and will. it doesn't matter if you guys got kids, if they provide everything for you blah blah., forget the excuses grab your bags and go.
If you genuinely care for and love your significant other, then the least you could do is respect their boundaries in regards to what they may consider cheating. If you can’t do that, then maybe an open(swingers, polyamorous) relationship is better for you but even in those cases there is still a level of respect required.
NEVER stay with someone that cheated on you cause you will NEVER look at them the same. They might beg and ask for forgiveness even pledging to do whatever it takes to get u back but after they see the boundaries that are put in place it’s suddenly too hard and then they start to gaslight you and to even go as far as them now wanting to leave you which can indeed make you feel crazy. Ive seen and heard way too many stories about this for it to be a coincidence. One thing about men their habits become very predictable. It will hurt alot to let them go but I promise you’re better off for it. You will be better than ever trust me when that period is over with
04:50 she says it's "'okay'' to cheat if you're in a bad relationship that's hard to get out of...! Lady, you have kids and are pregnant, so I hope that's not the ''wisdom'' you wish to impart on your children.
There’s never an excuse for cheating, and I stayed with someone for a couple months after they cheated. It’s literally soul crushing. I could never ever do it again.
well its clear that the girl in the opening shot was cheated on and then stayed with the cheater 😆 and now she is going through some cognitive dissonance
They value thrilling experiences and sex over morality their relationship. Cheaters are just inherently more selfish and weaker people than non-cheaters.
It amazes me what some people already call cheating and on the other hand some other people's "limits" for what is "still fine" for them. The difference is HUGE
staying with someone who cheated on you makes it clear to everyone that you have ZERO self-respect. allowing your partner to disrespect you in such a vile way AND continuing to stay with them? incredibly embarrassing and sad.
Cheating is cheap and eazy to do thats why so many people doing it these days Cheating shows weakness and insecurities about the human who is doing it... Having the options to cheat but saying No in the temptation is so valuable/powerful
I don't believe I would stay if someone cheated on me it just shows they really couldn't care less about how I'd feel if they did and it shows they do not care about me the same way, if they can't even bring themselves to do the bare minimum and not cheat it is not too much to ask.
My parents defined cheating as talking to someone of the opposite persuasion outside of a necessary business or social transaction. By that standard I have cheated by having long time women friends without any romance or sex involved. The decision to be not sober in a situation where a hookup is likely is a choice to likely have sex. That's cheating.
The girl at 1:26 sounds like a huge cheater that does not want to admit it. Lmao you cheating while alcohol still means you cheated. I got faded and now i’m not a cheater, like wtf.
Cheating is never ok. My now ex husband cheated on me when he was drunk. You absolutely do know what you are doing when absolutely stinking drunk. My now partner got so drunk he phoned me in the middle of the night and cried down the phone to tell me he loved and missed me. It just shows what’s on peoples minds more when they are drunk.
Cheating is never okay but I always live by the rule that loyalty doesn't depend on the other person and you should be loyal because that's just who you are. It also shows inner strength and willingness to forgive and makes you a million times more attractive and strong(saying this as someone who's been cheated on). Also, shout out to the people in this video who are so forgiving. Stand-up people💯
Unless you’re being abused or fear for your life there’s no such thing as being “stuck” you can always end a relationship If you just grow up and stop being selfish.
5:00 not an excuse lady. Sure the relationship could end but so could someone’s life. I was very unpredictable in my 20s and very lucky. I threw my GF AP from a 3rd story balcony. He dropped the charges and soon all charges were dropped. Her AP had 2 warrants out for him, he was a child predator.
I have a zero tolerance policy on cheating. But it seems like other people are more forgiving of cheating. I mean, if you're gonna forgive me when I cheat then what's the incentive for not cheating? Besides not wanting to hurt your significant other.
Nah people that cheat have a lack of empathy for sure, they cant think ahead to consider what they are doing will hurt their partner. Which is why a zero tolerance policy should be standard imo, odds are they wont learn at all from it and you'll be left hurting in the end.
@@Skyflairl2p I think he's trying to say that people make excuses for cheating when they are the ones doing the cheating. When a cheater is asked if it's okay to cheat, they think back to their experiences as a cheater. And rather than admit their wrongdoing, they make excuses for their behavior.
@@TheCoolestGeekEver My dumbass read "people that aren't forgiving" rather than "people arent forgiving" .. Which made his sentence have a.. different meaning😅😅 Well, not it makes more sense. I do think that it's only true to an extent though, I mean the net is cast wide here - some people who are cheated ON defend cheating because they delude themselves into thinking it wont happen again (which is like.. 1/1000th chance lets be honest). I.E, they are too good for their own sake (kindly put) Cheaters that say its ok or try to justify themselves in their actions are just egoists who failed to grow up.
"I don't think that being very intoxicated is consensual" that has to be the dumbest shit I've ever heard. My sister in christ. YOU intoxicated YOURSELF
Crazy how many ppl try to justify cheating. the leaps in logic ppl will make to try and say they were right to do that is generally fucked. Ik it’s hard to end shit but you’re just opening another can of worms emotionally or physically cheating
I'm not sure if that one lady who talks about being drunk is trying to imply that she was raped, OR if she's trying to justify her actions by saying she was drunk. Lots of cheaters try to say it's not their fault, or they didn't mean it, or it wasn't a big deal.
“Relying on somebody else for something that we exclusively rely on each other for.” is THEE cleanest overall definition of cheating I’ve ever heard.
Same thought
ABSOLUTELY TERRIBLE EXPLANATION. TERRIBLE TERRIBLE TERRIBLE.
@@zacka161why do you say that?
@@zacka161 Oh, my dear human.….I imagine you feel this way because you skipped past a word I typed (“overall”). My comment was made with clear understanding that there’s nuance within each situation.
@@andreaus. It doesn't matter the situation. Cheating is cheating and never justified.
Alcohol is NOT an excuse lol.
Right?? The girl who said that she doesn't consider it cheating when it's done intentionally drove me crazy lol. People are assholes and will not admit they're in the wrong when they actually are. What a bitch.
What if they were drunk and did it by accident?
@@kittycutetastic you don’t kiss someone by accident.
@@kittycutetastic what if they were driving drunk and killed someone by accident?
It seemed for this specific persons experience she was interfering that it was non-consensual… non-consensual = r@pe
A similar thing happened to a family member in high school with their “best friend”. Family member and high school sweet heart broke up, but quickly got back together and have been together for 30 years.
cheating just because you want the relationship to end is the dumbest thing ever
It's such a shitty excuse fr. Like what would hurt more telling someone you want to break up with them or them learning you cheated on them. The obvious answer to cause the least hurt is just breaking up with them.
It sends a message apparently
It's not logical. But not all humans can be logical at all times. I have done things out of pure emotion, it was not pretty. Still not okay to cheat, period.
If someone cheats on me and I find out, I consider it now an open relationship. I would get even and then dump them afterwards.
True. I would just ruin their reputation. Instead of a clean breakup.
Cheating is never ok....people will move mountains and defy both logic and reason to try and justify it though 😂
I wish we could understand it😂
depends on the circumstance
@@urbanzs what circumstances makes it better to cheat than leave the person you are with and then do your business?
@@urbanzs oh for sure, saying something is harder than doing it
@@ant__ant_ant If you’re in a relationship where trying to leave or break up the relationship might put you in physical danger, or at risk of losing your life.
That’s the only legitimate reason I can think of where cheating is morally justified.
Not to put it out there for people to use as a made up excuse when they want to cheat. If you want to mess around with others beyond the boundaries of your relationship, break it off first, or course. Anything else is cowardly and unjustifiable, even if it’s for revenge or whatever else excuse people use. But actual abusive relationships where your exit routes are fundamentally cut off for you, that is the one exception.
'it feels good, im a simple man' is ASTONISHING
Right?! I was shocked that he could easily say something like that. On camera too.
@@ashleigh6192 Let a woman say that openly and she'd be called out instantly
Well they asked him, why. It doesn't mean he's proud of it, just honest.
@@ZefParisoto how was he not proud when he smiled like that lmao. he was shameless about it not honest. he really thought that was a valid justification.
i was looking for this comment. was shocked by the openness, but i respect that he responded to the question truthfully
Her understanding of self-responsibility with intoxication and consent is concerning.
Very.
for real if you can’t control yourself when drunk or trust the people around you, don’t drink. that simple.
Yes, don't get drunk around strangers
@@BonShula wasn't even with a stranger it was a mutual friend lmao
i understood her in a very different way. she could be saying that she was drinking with a trusted friend and when they kissed her, she did not have the right mind to pull away or set boundaries. If the kiss was not her idea, there is actually such a thing like "too drunk to consent" and she should not be shamed for a situation she did not want to have.
"Cheating is relying on somebody else for something we exclusively rely on each other for"... That's all the definition we need. Well said 💯
Inherently, ‘cheating’ implies you’re doing something dishonest. So whatever you consider is cheating, is cheating. 🤷♀️
haha what.
So lying I ate an extra donut is cheating? I guess I am cheating my body.
stop trying to sound smart
@@XHydroYGenZ technically yes. That's why in gym culture, there's a concept of "cheat days" when you deviate from your prescribed diet and eat whatever the fuck you want on these days.
@@priyamtolani1480 So are you justifying cheat days on partners? I am so confused.
"they weren't paying me enough attention." GIRL JUST BREAK UP 💀💀💀if you thought of being with another person while in a relationship, you guys are already over
Well, not instantly. TALK ABOUT it first. If you value the relationship and partner, communicate your needs.
@@BillHicks420 It really is that simple, and if you cant confide in your partner about insecurities like these - then truly, you gotta work on yourself first as well.
Kinda crazy that common sense hops out the wazoo with some of these people though
@@Skyflairl2p Yeah, I think it also boils down to expectations and maturity. Adult relationships require work, dedication and communication.
You can't break up with someone over small and workable things - you'll never be able to settle down with someone.
@@BillHicks420 Perfectly put.
@@Skyflairl2p that's not really true though, I mean sometimes you'll talk to them about it and they won't listen, so it's better to just go to other routes
I feel bad for the girl in the opening. She is very forgiving and that's why she'll continue to be cheated on. They know she'll just forgive them.
I’m an empath I can’t help it 😩🥹
Don't feel bad. Learn from her experience and don't be like her. That way, her experience isn't taken in vain, even if she may take the fall.
@Kristiana Holladay I'm an empath and I would never forgive a cheater
That girl is so damn beautiful. If I was dating her I swear I wouldn’t cheat, why would you ruin having her in your life. She has the looks, is a sweet heart, and seem chill af. She is picking insane men if she is getting cheated on. Just my 2 cents
@@kristianaholladay6399 It’s not being an empath, it’s having no self respect.
The man I’ve loved the most in my life turned out to be married the entire time. What a timely video!!
😮I am so sorry. Karma will come his way.
😔😔😔
😶💙
I hope you are telling the wife.
@@leilabarese7908 most of the time the wife knows and will blame the other woman.
I believe cheating should be established early on and shouldn't be just an assumption.
As the one woman said micro cheating is following too many girls on social media.
I would not consider that cheating, but if she clarified it beforehand and that is their boundaries for THEIR relationship and it was agreed upon, then it'd be consider cheating for them.
The question "is it okay to ever cheat?". Is there any edge cases where it would be? Genuinely curious.
I made a separate comment on this but tell me what you think, because i know i get this a bit on Grindr (I'm not comfortable with it so i don't take part in it but its morally confusing to me.) but basically, old gay guys who married to fit in before homosexually became more accepted within society but have now committed to a 20+ year relationship and want a good upbringing for their children and still love their wife. Is it ok or do they tell their wife and risk the kid's growing up with divorced parents?
@Aaron I actually commented on your post too!
I don't think it is okay for the husband to continue lying to their wife. They need to create and establish a new relationship to create a more fulfilling life.
Divorced parents is not ideal by any means, but neither is lying, sneaking about, and hiding your true self.
Co parenting is very possible, not ideal I am sure, but much more appropriate than cheating and everyone can create healthy boundaries.
I am sure it is way more noticeable than they think it is and how much it affects their family.
I agree, I also wouldnt have considered following people cheating but if thats established and someone does that, yeah its cheating, you crossed the boundary you agreed to. I don’t think you should ever ASSUME certain boundaries, but at the same time I think a lot of times people KNOW they are cheating even if their partner didn’t explicitly state what they are doing as cheating. Like you going out to dinner every week with a co worker one on one outside of work not involving work and you don’t tell your partner and you HIDE it, even if nothing “happens” and its not against what you discussed as cheating, that still is cheating because you are hiding it because you know your partner wouldn’t like it and that intentional deceit is a form of cheating. People tend to know when they are doing something they shouldn’t be even if they are not breaking a “rule”. If you are thinking about it and having to justify it to yourself why its ok and why its “technically” allowed, you are already probably crossing some line, your justifiable actions shouldnt need a loop hole to be ok
I think an edge case would be one mentioned in the video where there’s abuse. I think people underestimate/downplay the toll that abuse can have whether it’s mental or physical. People say just leave that person but it’s not always that simple, and can even put your life in danger if they know you’re trying to leave. That being said, I personally don’t believe victims should be forced to live their lives void of intimacy and connection because they’re stuck in circumstances out of their control. An effort should be made to leave and get to a safe place, but until then I can understand why one would cheat and would go so far as to say it’s okay given that their partner isn’t showing actions of caring for their humanity themselves.
Edit: Also wanted to add I 100% agree the terms should be discussed beforehand. I hate “cheating is cheating” because as you stated, that’s different depending on the person. I define cheating as “being intimate with another person in ways that cross the boundaries of your relationship.” This way, the boundaries themselves can be determined by the people in the relationship and they’re not just assumed.
@Bubby707 I completely agree!
I think there is situations that can come up that the 2 partners have not established any boundaries on yet. That's when a discussion should be had to discuss what the other person's perspective on it is!
Example: if I partner was offered to go get coffee with a coworker at his new job, and he said yes. Maybe he didn't get the chance to discuss it prior and made the decision he made then spoke about it with his partner. Come to find out the partner considered that cheating and is NOT comfortable with it.
He didn't cheat since it was not established but if he did it again, it would be considered cheating
^this example to me is on the extreme side. I don't think people should be controlling their partners this way. BUT I do understand some people find this appropriate and that's how they might operate their relationship.
Drunk cheating is still cheating lady😑
These be the type to accuse someone of r*** because they were too “drunk” to consent. You cheated. Take accountability. Be careful you guys! Her logic is dangerous! 1:24
This is not to the women/men who have really been taken advantage of in these types of situations.
This is to the women/men who try to absolve themselves of accountability because they don’t want to lose their boyfriend/girlfriend, be looked at in a certain way, or just regret their decision.
Of course the man doesn't know anything about consent, especially under the influence. I'm sure we'll see your name in the court system for sexual assault one day, since your logic is that all drunken girls can consent.
@@coopd97 found the r*pist...yikes dude.
@@DA-js7xzWhy is all responsibility on the man? Don’t get so drunk you black out. If a drunken girl is immune from liability of poor decisions of consent, than a drunken boy is also immune from their poor drunken decisions also. Both are responsible. Not one. Many ppl regret past sexual partners, but you can’t say you were raped bc you said yes but regretted it. We must accept responsibility for our behavior.
The only times it's "okay" or "not that bad" is when your partner is abusive and you are afraid of leaving. But honestly at that point he relationship is no longer considered a relationship and more of a hostage situation.
But I feel like that would make things worse wouldn’t it? Imagine you cheat on an abusive partner . I’d imagine you’d carry some sort of guilt and anxiety about both your partner finding out and just general morality. And think if your partner did find out than your safety is completely gone and things could get even more destructive. Sure it’s justifiable to cheat in a scenario like that but in the grand scheme of things it could put you in much more complicated and dangerous scenario
@lmao Sorry not sorry but it's still not okay. Like is it that important to get laid that while in an abusive relationship instead of planning to get out safely you'd rather find someone else and then depend on that person to get out? They can count on family, on friends and if they have none there's special numbers to call for people in abusive relationship that could help with an attorney.
@lmao But cheating and leaving with someone else could literally still cause an abusive ex to still harass, stalk and harm you since you’re betraying their “trust” in warped minds. Cheating could make scenarios like that even more likely and worse for you and the person you cheated with IMO
@lmao me writing a lot doesn't mean i'm "mad".
I wrote that to inform people that cheating on an abuser might not be the best idea out there, that's all.
Is it even cheating at that point? Like imo, if you're in a relationship - and it turns abusive.. Is that really a relationship anymore? I dont consider that to be true, its a hostage situation at most.
You cheat on someone who loves you, even a little. But the second violence is part of the "partnership" its.. well, hardly much love left if im honest.
Never stay with someone who cheated on you. You’re just gonna get played all your life
EXACTLY! Because they’re not sorry they cheated, they’re just sorry they were caught.
What cheaters say behind their partners’ backs after said partners take them back-is sickening. There is no respect or constant fear of revenge-cheating and of course broken trust.
Most people don't get women who stay with cheaters are more than likely doing dirt themselves.
@@claff4573 NO, most have no self-esteem or the benefit of staying outweighs leaving, like financially or for the kids.
Yea the relationship will never be the same you don't cheat on someone you TRULY love
@@heavyhead2k139Says the pump dumpster
The way so many people said they would forgive their partner for cheating is insane to me.
You don't get to have an opinion on other people's relationships. There are valid reasons to do so and the people who chose to stay should not be judge by people who know nothing about the situation.
Most people cheat. Of course it's easy to say "I'd never ever forgive that, so horrible!" but in the end, when you're already in that situation and you're in each other's lives, it's different.
@@May04bwunope 😅 Other like you, some of us are full of self confidence, love and pride. And we know for a fact that were 2 Good 2 settle For a lying, deceitful chicken coward.... If you deserve the bare minimum, then just say that, but I've been in that situation. Engaged a month before marriage and I walked away and I have 0 regrets.!!!!! Stay up
honestly, I think it's probably because they've cheated themselves and would want to be forgiven. Or just an extremely low sense of self worth. Accepting cheating in a relationship is NOT normal. Let's not normalize it.
@@hypnoteapotthe person doesn’t respect you or care about you. And you lack self respect.
My ex husband was actively trying to have sex with a girl much younger than him who was a friend of his little sister. She was a young mother and he told her what an amazing mom she is and how sexy she is meanwhile I was at home with our 2 month old. He claims he didn’t cheat because they didn’t physically have sex. Absolutely crazy to me for him to think that lol. Getting cheated on is absolutely shattering. I’m glad the general consensus is that cheating doesn’t always mean sex!
Nah, it’s never okay to cheat. I might be the bad guy here but I’ve dumped people over the mental realization that I’m attracted or fantasizing about someone else. That was enough for me to be like I need to be single. Sure they might feel blindsided at me just up and leaving but it’s better that way then betraying their trust and lying to them by cheating.
Nah, personally I’ve experienced both and I gotta say both hurt just as bad. Being ghosted with no explanation is even worse though because you’re left there with so many questions
I think it’s ok to experience attraction whilst in a relationship- like we’re only human ?? People experience attraction but the most important thing is that if you’re in a committed relationship, you don’t act on it( in regards to monogamy- ppl have different rules) overall it’s just about respecting your partner and communicating
@@lilbeanladdy5511 no
Being in a relationship doesn't make you BLIND. You can find other people attractive and be faithful. 😂
@@ESWilliams09 no
Cheating is wrong. Shows the person’s lack of moral and lack of care towards you. Move on.
Better to be single than be with some one who will disrespect you.
I dumped someone who cheated on me.
His excuse was, “well, it wasn’t like I was trying to replace you.”
That’s one of the reasons people cheat, not to replace but to have fun while knowing you’re their stable person at home.
wow, what an asshole thing to say. Good on you for walking away from that
“That’s one of the reasons people cheat, not to replace but to have fun while knowing you’re their stable person at home.“
SO TRUE!!!! That’s the fact of the matter and it’s why you should never stay with a cheater.
thats the most coldblooded and coldhearted excuse i've heard.
NOOOOO! Cheating is NEVER ok! Doesn't matter if it's relationships, taxes or board games. No one actually desires a cheater.
"no one actually desires a cheater". Really? As far as I can see cheaters desire cheaters. It takes two to Tango.
The only time I excuse cheating is education and I'm talking about tests and stuff! ESPECIALLY if the teacher does a terrible job at teaching or actually doesn't teach at all! I would've agreed with you on all levels but high school made me run into some really "iffy" teachers
I will definitely cheat taxes, fuck taxes
Never okay to cheat!! Wouldn’t stay with them either.
Unless they cheated first imo.
@@XHydroYGenZ That's an immature opinion tbh
@@XHydroYGenZ don't put yourself down because of others .
Don’t be naive.
@@LungaMasilela I will be - not staying with someone who cheats tf
This video perfectly shows why you can't just have a generic, one-size-fits-all definition of cheating, and why each couple is different and needs to have that discussion early on. For example, "micro-cheating" may be a limit for some couples (such as the one gal saying its not okay to follow to many girls on instagram). But for other couples, such as me and my wife, even casual flirting is 100% okay because the intent isn't to actually take that other person home. As always, communication is key.
You make a strong point. Also, couples could talk early on about being swingers. Seen my friends, who are a swingers couple, and they discuss what is and isn’t allowed. Before they do anything they ask the other if they can. If they say yes, then cool. If they say no, then that’s that.
Isn't it common sense that the human experience is subjective to one's culture and individuality? I don't get your point.
"micro-cheating" people literally making things up just bc they don't like something 🤣
@@XHydroYGenZ Common sense is not that common.
Not really, if you did something, and you kept it from your partner. And you know that they wouldn't like it. And you know that you wouldn't like it done to you is pretty basic knowledge. You learn that with making friends. So there's no excuse, you just like playing Stupid, or you are stupid, probably both😅.in The history of books of cheating 100% Of the time the person knew what they were doing was wrong, which is why they always fail to mention it to their partner. If you're that dumb, don't date, it's not a necessary in life.
Interesting. I noticed that most of the women cheaters justified it by saying they felt trapped in their relationships, but the men cheaters were like “yeah I just felt like it”.
Reasons may vary from person to person you know,it doesnt really justify anything from the woman's side.
Its a commitment thing. Women cheating tend to blame the man for no reason most of the times. Men cheaters just act like nothing happened because they crave that sexual dopamine and its very impulsive. Both things are equally worse. Blaming your partner or feeling like nothing happened.
@@amukbir8777yes this, finally someone said it. I’m tired of seeing one gender justifying their reasons, saying “men can’t go their whole life only loving one woman, it’s their biology.” Or, women saying vice versa, whether it had to do with their self esteem or not. Both are equally as bad, and I hate the fact society tries to downplay one side
1:30. I hate this girl
She's not only cheats, but then states "oh I wasn't even consenting" so how am I in the wrong? Alcohol is not an excuse, and beyond that you can't literally say you live in some fairy land world when drunk.. where reality doesn't still apply
your take is very unscientific alcohol affects the hippocampus (memory center), which is why we black out; the motor cortex, which is why we stumble; and the prefrontal cortex. the part of the brain most responsible for reasoning and judgment, It does not simply tear down our inhibitions and let loose dormant desires. It is an active chemical process, counter-intuitively fitting the definitions of “stimulant” and “depressant.” It changes nearly every part of our brain. Since our brain is who we are, alcohol does not simply let out our true, unchanged selves. It changes who we are.
Alcohol makes us happy, woozy, enthusiastic, gregarious, and loud. In some cases, an affable friend may become a mean drunk. It is a complicated drug with all sorts of good and bad effects. But it does not make us genuine. It just makes us dumb.
@@houseofactionthis was a great comment thanks 😊
@@houseofaction Mimimi
@@houseofaction i ain't reading all that ☠️️
08:41 lmao that's actually sad. But impressive self awareness though
Cheating is never okay. If you're a cheater you don't have basic empathy for others.
Cheating is good. Cheating should be done worldwide. It's good to cheat on your partner and break her heart and make her feel like a piece of shit (I'm joking).
What if that's the thing - what if you don't have that empathy thing but you know cheating is wrong, would like to not, but it doesn't register because you do lack empathy?
Cheating is never ok. That sick feeling and pain in the chest when you find out, suddenly your world just falls apart. You’ll never forget that feeling 💔
I cheated and learned from it. And I’m a 25 year old male. Would never cheat again and would take it back if I could. One of the biggest lessons you learn as a young man.
Dumbass
A male taking accountability and not blaming women I seen it all well done 👏
@@missandry2669 hahaha thank you 🙏🏽
Most stand up men take accountability for all their actions. It's unfortunate if you've not met any men like that.
Facts.
any sort of cheating is a huge no, but personally I think emotional cheating is the worst.
Wasn't cheating because she was intoxicated? She needs to take responsibility for her actions, intoxicated or not.
I felt like she was talking about being sexually assaulted or raped .
It sounded like in this case she could have been taken advantage of. If someone is too intoxicated to consent, no one needs to be trying to hook up with them. That’s creepy!!
Ooo what about the guy who said “I like cheating, I am a simple man”
@@suhashareef6275 That's wrong imo. He's not recognising the impact he has and role he plays in disrespecting other people. That's selfishness and immaturity imo.
alcohol affects the hippocampus (memory center), which is why we black out; the motor cortex, which is why we stumble; and the prefrontal cortex. the part of the brain most responsible for reasoning and judgment, It does not simply tear down our inhibitions and let loose dormant desires. It is an active chemical process, counter-intuitively fitting the definitions of “stimulant” and “depressant.” It changes nearly every part of our brain. Since our brain is who we are, alcohol does not simply let out our true, unchanged selves. It changes who we are.
Alcohol makes us happy, woozy, enthusiastic, gregarious, and loud. In some cases, an affable friend may become a mean drunk. It is a complicated drug with all sorts of good and bad effects. But it does not make us genuine. It just makes us dumb.
For those that rather cheat than just tell your partner you don’t want to be with them. Just tell them you don’t want to be in the relationship anymore rather than cheat because getting cheated on is scaring and hurts way worst.
But if you successfully cheat and they never know, it can be quite a fun and exhilarating experience while also having a loyal partner. Not everyone has morals.
@@XHydroYGenZ i just physically recoiled at your comment. how disgusting
@@XHydroYGenZ yeah sadly we live in a world full of cheaters, grapest and edp’s just a bunch of weirdo out there 🤷🏾♂️
@@jadesampson9493 it's not disgusting lol I agree with them, depending on the conditions
@@divine555So? You're a nobody, why would anyone here care if you agree or not
There are few things more painful than finding out the person you trust the most in the world, the person you think has your back, the person you love more than anyone else cheats on you. It is never okay.
"I'm just a simple man." Yeah, ok, if you want to sleep with a lot of people, that's completely fine, but then don't get into a relationship. Cause if simple men cheat, I don't want a simple man.
*into a monogamous and not open relationship
Simple good men don’t cheat that was just a bad guy
Damn this was way more intense than i expected
For those who see it as a very easy question not worth asking, consider this. A problem highlighted by many of these answers is that different people have different definitions of cheating, and different expectations for their partners. Often people enter into relationships assuming they are on the same page about what is acceptable. Sometimes you can clear up all the confusion by talking things out early on, and sometimes you realize down the line after making mistakes that the best option for you is to re-establish the terms of your relationship and the promises you are making to each other.
Nothing wrong with setting a zero tolerance boundary against cheating, far from it. But that's not for everyone, and it doesn't even mean the same thing to everyone.
Learn the difference between a monogamous and a polygamous relationship.
You set boundaries when you first start the relationship to know if you’re on the same page; should be common sense but it sadly isn’t to many.
This comment doesn’t make sense since you’re not referring to different relationship types, since you’re making up your own random opinion as if relationships don’t have structures and rules in the first place.
@@aus-li Relationship "types" are just generalizations. Labels like monogamous and polyamorous are useful shorthands, but partners can still have different understandings of what they mean and what's against the rules. Every relationship is a little bit unique and it's useful to discuss boundaries more specifically.
@@HenryZhaosTextbook I mean, those are the most common types, unless it gets into asexual or the hookup culture.
And that’s what I mean, that the best strategy is to talk about what you’re looking for in a relationship, or if you’re looking for a friend that’ll eventually turn into a relationship.
@@HenryZhaosTextbookI dont get how someone in a monogamous relationship can be okay with cheating, this video isn't about what is considered cheating, it's starting from the point that the cheating was taken place and if there is a justification.
So I don't get te point?
Cheating can be different from couple to couple, but this video isn't about that.
This guy cheated on me and wanted me back. I had him sit on my couch and tell me every detail about it while he cried his pathetic eyes out. He thought he would win me over but I kicked his blubbering arse out the door. It was so unbelievably satisfying.
Reading this was unbelievably satisfying as well lol. You absolutely deserve better
W
Wow, who's more evil between you two?
Well, you are a rattlesnake after all, and rattlesnakes don't mess around!
It's never ok to cheat Idc how badly your partner treats you if you don't wanna be with them break up with them/Divorce them. Never cheat on someone
Highly disagree with that because that partner could be highly abusive and toxic and could abuse you in so many different ways that leaves you traumatized for the rest of your life. There's also abusive relaionships where you cannot leave in fear of that person tracking you down and killing you
@@zaksharman ^agree 100% doesn’t make it necessary ok but makes it justifiable. Leaving an abusive relationship it a lot easier said than done
@@zaksharman True, but if your so scared that this person is gonna hurt you or something, why cheat? If they find out they will get even more angry, mad, and sad. Cheating hurts someone a lot. So if your scared they are gonns hurt you and you cheat? If they find out they are gonna hurt you even more. It's better to get out of there and then find someone else instead of finding someone else while with someone even if they are toxic/abusive
@@Tomboysksksk To me they would hurt you just as badly regardless of wether cheating occured or not. I know mutiple girls that were abused by a former partner that badly to the point where all of them cheated on him because that was the only way they could finally escape the hell they had been put through for years
I feel you on all that but also how the other comments are saying unless there abusive then that’s a whole other level!
There are tons of psychological studies that show how cheating negatively effects both people, unless you’re trapped in an abusive relationship there is zero justification for cheating.
I haven't cheated on a single girl that I've dated. Even if I no longer have any feelings for her, I'm still degrading myself by lying and going back on my word. All the breakups have been civil as well, sat down and discussed why I felt we were just not working together anymore, or vice versa. None of that ghosting/blocking/etc crap that is so popular these days.
The lady at 4:59 has given out red Flags in like 3 different videos lmao, she has 3 kids with 3 different Men, got super defensive in the guess the body count video, has cheated and is now saying its okay to cheat? She does have crazy eyes
That "I'm just a simple man" answer infuriates me the most.
Well he is free to have sex with who he want and if you don’t respect that than you don’t have respect
4:55 At that point your objective shouldn't be to get into another relationship, it should be to get out of the one you are currently in. Looking for emotional support to help you deal with or get out of a bad situation is one thing, but it's another thing to go and look for a romantic relationship to get out of the one you are currently in. It's like trying to pay off debt with more debt.
REGARDLESS of the "excuse" for cheating, cheating is never "ok"....period!
How is it easier to cheat rather than breaking up…they’re gonna be upset either way
the people saying it’s not okay to cheat and then saying they would stay with someone who cheated are telling the other person it’s okay lol
Cheating happens in both monogamous and polyamorous relationships so just be very clear and communicative about what you and the other party want prior committing to avoid reaching point cheat and breakup.
I was in a long distance relationship for 2 years. Never cheated but my boyfriend, at the time, and I talked about opening the relationship while we were long distance. The plan was to have multiple partners but then go back to being monogamous when we move in together. In the end, we didn’t pursue multiple partners. We broke up. Would have had to hold it together for another 2 years and I couldn’t do it. Either way, neither of us cheated. Long distance is NOT an excuse to cheat.
0:19 With that reaction he totally told on himself lol he looked like he felt attacked 💀
advice to everyone--> if someone cheats on you... grab your bags and leave period. and don't look back.
yea yea its hard blah blah. easier said than done blah blah --> leave anyways. I promise you that you'll figure something out and you'll find someone who respects you and loves you more than that person ever has and will.
it doesn't matter if you guys got kids, if they provide everything for you blah blah., forget the excuses grab your bags and go.
it’s never ok to cheat lol
6:18 ewwww both of these men 💀💀💀
If you genuinely care for and love your significant other, then the least you could do is respect their boundaries in regards to what they may consider cheating. If you can’t do that, then maybe an open(swingers, polyamorous) relationship is better for you but even in those cases there is still a level of respect required.
Cut really had me wondering if this guy 7:10 was the legendary astronaut, plumber, doctor and mechanic.
Girl
@@oranjebeer6637 The guy after her
NEVER stay with someone that cheated on you cause you will NEVER look at them the same. They might beg and ask for forgiveness even pledging to do whatever it takes to get u back but after they see the boundaries that are put in place it’s suddenly too hard and then they start to gaslight you and to even go as far as them now wanting to leave you which can indeed make you feel crazy. Ive seen and heard way too many stories about this for it to be a coincidence. One thing about men their habits become very predictable. It will hurt alot to let them go but I promise you’re better off for it. You will be better than ever trust me when that period is over with
It’s never ok to cheat .. if someone does they have no self control and a problem with themselves they need to work on
Wow, finally a sensible comment
It concerns me the amount of people who said they would stay if they were cheated on
1:36 you cheated, thats it dont go around it dont try to justify with stupid reasons, it is what it is, own it and let her heal.
4:16 she really unintentionally shat on concept of open relationships 😂😂😂
2:28 is 100% another version of Ray William Johnson
THE MICHEAL B JORDAN PART LMFAOO😭😭
she is for the streets!
04:50 she says it's "'okay'' to cheat if you're in a bad relationship that's hard to get out of...! Lady, you have kids and are pregnant, so I hope that's not the ''wisdom'' you wish to impart on your children.
There’s never an excuse for cheating, and I stayed with someone for a couple months after they cheated. It’s literally soul crushing. I could never ever do it again.
1:23 some solid mental gymnastics on display here
cheating only in an extreme situation like you’re in an abusive relationship
2:58 even though she cheated she took full responsibilty and regrets it, W move
4:04 - your Amy Winehouse tattoo is legit!
The lady at 2:00 really hit the nail on the head 🙌🏼
Fr
Wow a keep it 💯 video over 10min long!!🙌 I am here for this!! I like hearing longer explanations of answers
Probably the first time where everyone agrees. Maybe not concerning the nuances, but generally everyone agrees.
That's not really saying much. You'd have to be a sociopath to think cheating is okay.
well its clear that the girl in the opening shot was cheated on and then stayed with the cheater 😆 and now she is going through some cognitive dissonance
Some cheaters have deeper roots other than not being “satisfied” or “unhappy.”
They value thrilling experiences and sex over morality their relationship. Cheaters are just inherently more selfish and weaker people than non-cheaters.
It amazes me what some people already call cheating and on the other hand some other people's "limits" for what is "still fine" for them. The difference is HUGE
Cheating: doing something you wouldn’t do in front of your partner or wouldn’t want them to find out about.
That's not cheating that's flirting 0:49
staying with someone who cheated on you makes it clear to everyone that you have ZERO self-respect. allowing your partner to disrespect you in such a vile way AND continuing to stay with them? incredibly embarrassing and sad.
you're so right
As I once heard, staying with a cheater is giving them permission to do it again
ik I’m a clown🥲🥲
Exactly, you give away all the power by doing that.
It means you're willing to look passed it for love. Get over yourself
Not me, a elementary teacher, assuming they are talking about homework…
Cheating is not a mistake its a choice. DONE PERIODT
Cheating is cheap and eazy to do thats why so many people doing it these days
Cheating shows weakness and insecurities about the human who is doing it...
Having the options to cheat but saying No in the temptation is so valuable/powerful
9:38 She described it so perfectly
8:35 A very emotionally intelligent perspective (a 2nd chance, willingness to reconnect and reconcile)
I don't believe I would stay if someone cheated on me it just shows they really couldn't care less about how I'd feel if they did and it shows they do not care about me the same way, if they can't even bring themselves to do the bare minimum and not cheat it is not too much to ask.
I don't understand how anybody could do such a thing like cheating, it's incredibly immature.
Its evil
My parents defined cheating as talking to someone of the opposite persuasion outside of a necessary business or social transaction.
By that standard I have cheated by having long time women friends without any romance or sex involved.
The decision to be not sober in a situation where a hookup is likely is a choice to likely have sex. That's cheating.
The girl at 1:26 sounds like a huge cheater that does not want to admit it. Lmao you cheating while alcohol still means you cheated. I got faded and now i’m not a cheater, like wtf.
Cheating is never ok. My now ex husband cheated on me when he was drunk. You absolutely do know what you are doing when absolutely stinking drunk. My now partner got so drunk he phoned me in the middle of the night and cried down the phone to tell me he loved and missed me. It just shows what’s on peoples minds more when they are drunk.
Wow, that girl doesn't want to admit she cheated so she's trying to make out she got raped? That's quite a serious accusation!
Cheating is never okay but I always live by the rule that loyalty doesn't depend on the other person and you should be loyal because that's just who you are. It also shows inner strength and willingness to forgive and makes you a million times more attractive and strong(saying this as someone who's been cheated on). Also, shout out to the people in this video who are so forgiving. Stand-up people💯
denial and insecurity is insane in this video.
Unless you’re being abused or fear for your life there’s no such thing as being “stuck” you can always end a relationship If you just grow up and stop being selfish.
Good to know you can just whatever you want when intoxicated
It’s never OK to cheat and if someone says it is, don’t date that person they’re going to cheat.
5:00 not an excuse lady. Sure the relationship could end but so could someone’s life. I was very unpredictable in my 20s and very lucky. I threw my GF AP from a 3rd story balcony. He dropped the charges and soon all charges were dropped. Her AP had 2 warrants out for him, he was a child predator.
I have a zero tolerance policy on cheating. But it seems like other people are more forgiving of cheating. I mean, if you're gonna forgive me when I cheat then what's the incentive for not cheating? Besides not wanting to hurt your significant other.
Nah people that cheat have a lack of empathy for sure, they cant think ahead to consider what they are doing will hurt their partner. Which is why a zero tolerance policy should be standard imo, odds are they wont learn at all from it and you'll be left hurting in the end.
People aren't forgiving, they're just doing dirt themselves
@@claff4573 genuinely tf you talking about
@@Skyflairl2p
I think he's trying to say that people make excuses for cheating when they are the ones doing the cheating.
When a cheater is asked if it's okay to cheat, they think back to their experiences as a cheater. And rather than admit their wrongdoing, they make excuses for their behavior.
@@TheCoolestGeekEver My dumbass read "people that aren't forgiving" rather than "people arent forgiving" .. Which made his sentence have a.. different meaning😅😅
Well, not it makes more sense.
I do think that it's only true to an extent though, I mean the net is cast wide here - some people who are cheated ON defend cheating because they delude themselves into thinking it wont happen again (which is like.. 1/1000th chance lets be honest). I.E, they are too good for their own sake (kindly put)
Cheaters that say its ok or try to justify themselves in their actions are just egoists who failed to grow up.
"I don't think that being very intoxicated is consensual"
that has to be the dumbest shit I've ever heard. My sister in christ. YOU intoxicated YOURSELF
The way he said 'do you regret it' - I heard the button right there! 😂
Why is it so hard to just break up with someone before you sleep with someone else??
Or get engaged to someone to else. Which happened in my case
Perfect way to end the video, with my guy with the red bucket hat spittin fire.
Crazy how many ppl try to justify cheating. the leaps in logic ppl will make to try and say they were right to do that is generally fucked. Ik it’s hard to end shit but you’re just opening another can of worms emotionally or physically cheating
Oh god i can't with the extreme ass excuses...
I'm not sure if that one lady who talks about being drunk is trying to imply that she was raped, OR if she's trying to justify her actions by saying she was drunk. Lots of cheaters try to say it's not their fault, or they didn't mean it, or it wasn't a big deal.