See, if SHE had said something to that cashier, she would not only have been called an angry black woman stereotype, but keep in mind her claims and complaints would most likely be ignored because she'd be """pulling out the race card""". When people of color such as myself point out racial problems in our society, white people tell us we're pulling the race card. But when white people (or white-passing, in this case) do it for us, they are often listened to, and referred to as noble. Which isn't to say Cathleen (Kathleen?) didn't do a good thing! It's just that we must keep in mind what would have happened if it were the speaker who had said something.
I'm Canadian Cree First Nation. I remember when I was in Safeway, and my children and I were followed around by the security guard. I had my phone on vibrate and it went off in my purse so I opened the purse. At the checkout counter infront of all those people...he took me aside and asked to look in my purse. He had seen me open it. My children were devastated as we were dragged to the back of the store to security. He found my wallet and my phone...then I returned all the groceries.
I've often felt that privilege (and the discrimination it comes from) will only change when the people who benefit from the privilege make the change, when the people who can only lose from changing the status quo make the change.
This makes me want to cry, but I am also loving how she is encouraging people to make changes and step up. She is wonderful and I am sorry this happened to her, but wow how strong she is. I want to be like her.
Bystanders can do this in a variety of situations. Racism, sexism, ageism... We all have a responsibility to hold each other accountable in the face of all of these forms of harassment.
It's all about having a sense of awareness. Being aware of your surroundings, aware of the possible mindsets of those that you encounter and being sympathetic to the subjectivity of things. Speaking up rather than remaining silent makes all the difference. I love that your level of awareness has been raised. Kudos and the best of wishes to you!
I am in tears as someone speaks about what unfortunately is nearly a daily experience for me sometimes. When I talk about it few people seem to get what I am talking about. At least with you and your accomplishments someone might hear you because you become privilidged.in another way. I on the other hand am in University trying to get some credentials so that perhaps someone will listen to me an attribute a little validity to my experiences.
My husband, who is African-American, and I have similar experiences on a fairly regular basis. I will be treated in an entirely different and more favorable manner than he. When Christopher is standing ahead of me in a line, staff will often offer to help me first, or restaurant staff, assuming that we are not together, will offer to seat me rather than him. The such racism, even today, so deeply pervades our society is disgraceful.
Even though she "can't know for sure" what would have happened if she spoke up it's pretty clear what would have happened. She would have been the "angry black woman" and she would be dismissed or accused of being irate and oversensitive. Just like I am often cast as the "angry lesbian" or "angry feminist" when I speak up about injustices. When you stereotype a group of people as angry and overly sensitive it becomes much easier to dismiss their concerns. It's a clever trick of oppression, no?
I've only recently become aware that white privilege exists and that I've benefited from it, but I wasn't sure what to do if I come across a situation like this. I've worried that I'd be taking authority or autonomy from the person of color, not letting them solve the problem. But now that I've seen this, I know what to do. Thank you so much for this video.
As the grandmother of a half black (African) half white little boy, I am now very much aware of this now and slowly feeling my way. How can I use my white privilege to stand up against bigotry without offending the very people I want to stand up for?
Beautiful. This is the way to use privilege. I dream of a day where no one of any cultural group will have to go through this just because of their skin colour.
It breaks my heart that we live in a world like this. But I am incredibly grateful for people like Joy and her sister who encourage others and speak up against the ignorance and wrong doing of others.
Brilliant! We can't undo our white privilege but we can find ways of using it to create justice and better understanding! We don't lose privilege by extending it to others. Thanks to Joy DeGruy for this terrific story. And to Shakti Butler once again for bringing truth through her films.
also a good thing to note in addition to what the OP said, is that with your white privilege be aware that you have it and that sometimes even white people with good intentions tend to try to put in a voice that overshadows the voices of POC or those without the privilege your possess (male privililge/hetero privilige/etc).
Sometimes I forget I have white privilege, because I would never think of being prejudiced to someone just because of someone's skin colour. I can't believe people are still so close minded. We're all people
I don't like this story. Do we need to depend on white or interracial people to stand up for us? Black people should be owning their own stores everywhere and secondly using our economic power to decide where we spend our money. Finally I would have just waited until the cashier was finished and moved on.
Wow, just wow. So much not what I see in my reality (life experience) being part of the "privileged." For lack of a better term, facing it really sucks. I am a west coast transplant from the Bay Area to Alabama. Lots of things different out here. I am sure I understand the dynamics, but I also surely don't want to accept it. I am also sorry that some of the few have predisposed bias on more of the many.
this is a sad reality that I wish didn't exist. God forgive me if I have ever made anyone (whatever their race) feel this way. I was in years watching that. what right does ANYONE have to make another human being feel like that? it shouldn't happen. ever.
See, if SHE had said something to that cashier, she would not only have been called an angry black woman stereotype, but keep in mind her claims and complaints would most likely be ignored because she'd be """pulling out the race card""". When people of color such as myself point out racial problems in our society, white people tell us we're pulling the race card. But when white people (or white-passing, in this case) do it for us, they are often listened to, and referred to as noble.
Which isn't to say Cathleen (Kathleen?) didn't do a good thing! It's just that we must keep in mind what would have happened if it were the speaker who had said something.
This woman's voice is beautiful and she used it to make a great point.
instead of being ashamed you have privilege and others don't, do this
I'm Canadian Cree First Nation. I remember when I was in Safeway, and my children and I were followed around by the security guard. I had my phone on vibrate and it went off in my purse so I opened the purse. At the checkout counter infront of all those people...he took me aside and asked to look in my purse. He had seen me open it. My children were devastated as we were dragged to the back of the store to security. He found my wallet and my phone...then I returned all the groceries.
I've often felt that privilege (and the discrimination it comes from) will only change when the people who benefit from the privilege make the change, when the people who can only lose from changing the status quo make the change.
This makes me want to cry, but I am also loving how she is encouraging people to make changes and step up. She is wonderful and I am sorry this happened to her, but wow how strong she is. I want to be like her.
Joy is so eloquent. Amazing!
Bystanders can do this in a variety of situations. Racism, sexism, ageism... We all have a responsibility to hold each other accountable in the face of all of these forms of harassment.
It's all about having a sense of awareness. Being aware of your surroundings, aware of the possible mindsets of those that you encounter and being sympathetic to the subjectivity of things. Speaking up rather than remaining silent makes all the difference. I love that your level of awareness has been raised. Kudos and the best of wishes to you!
I love this.
Whenever I see anything like this happening, I'm going to have to step in.
What a powerful message - and yet it's sad this is still an issue.
Thank you for uploading this beautiful video.
Why are we calling her Joy? Isn't it customary to show some respect? Her name is DR. Joy DeGruy.
Great video, I wish more people would use their white privilege to expose racial bias! Kathleen is a great woman!!
I am in tears as someone speaks about what unfortunately is nearly a daily experience for me sometimes. When I talk about it few people seem to get what I am talking about. At least with you and your accomplishments someone might hear you because you become privilidged.in another way. I on the other hand am in University trying to get some credentials so that perhaps someone will listen to me an attribute a little validity to my experiences.
My husband, who is African-American, and I have similar experiences on a fairly regular basis. I will be treated in an entirely different and more favorable manner than he. When Christopher is standing ahead of me in a line, staff will often offer to help me first, or restaurant staff, assuming that we are not together, will offer to seat me rather than him. The such racism, even today, so deeply pervades our society is disgraceful.
Very eye opening and done with grace.
Even though she "can't know for sure" what would have happened if she spoke up it's pretty clear what would have happened. She would have been the "angry black woman" and she would be dismissed or accused of being irate and oversensitive. Just like I am often cast as the "angry lesbian" or "angry feminist" when I speak up about injustices. When you stereotype a group of people as angry and overly sensitive it becomes much easier to dismiss their concerns. It's a clever trick of oppression, no?
I've only recently become aware that white privilege exists and that I've benefited from it, but I wasn't sure what to do if I come across a situation like this. I've worried that I'd be taking authority or autonomy from the person of color, not letting them solve the problem. But now that I've seen this, I know what to do. Thank you so much for this video.
As a straight, white, male I strive to be as good a person as this woman's sister in law.
Very insightful. I wonder how many times this has happened to me without even noticing.
This is the first time I have ever come across the term White Privilege used in a constructive way. Thank you.
That's quite a story. I would pay good money to see the look on that cashier's face.
As the grandmother of a half black (African) half white little boy, I am now very much aware of this now and slowly feeling my way. How can I use my white privilege to stand up against bigotry without offending the very people I want to stand up for?
Beautiful. This is the way to use privilege. I dream of a day where no one of any cultural group will have to go through this just because of their skin colour.
Beautiful, truly.
This is inspiring. If I ever get the opportunity, I'm going to put my white skin and my voice to good use
This almost makes me cry
Beautiful!
It breaks my heart that we live in a world like this. But I am incredibly grateful for people like Joy and her sister who encourage others and speak up against the ignorance and wrong doing of others.
I love this, keep speaking out!
I'm glad your in-law stepped in and defended you!
That's an amazing story :) and Joy tells it so well!
That was amazing. Thank you for sharing!
This was really interesting!
Incredible
I am in love with the way she talks. I wish was my great aunt of something.
I very much enjoyed this video thank you
Brilliant! We can't undo our white privilege but we can find ways of using it to create justice and better understanding! We don't lose privilege by extending it to others.
Thanks to Joy DeGruy for this terrific story. And to Shakti Butler once again for bringing truth through her films.
this is fascinating.
And I endeavor to do so. Thank you for such an eloquent reminder.
Good story.
Wonderful friend (sister in law)
great video!!!
This is something to make us all think
I love this story!
This is beautiful
So amazing!
this nearly brought me to tears. I love this.
Loving! This is real courage, that most don't posses .
thanks for this!
AMEN.
yes gurl. PREACH.
also a good thing to note in addition to what the OP said, is that with your white privilege be aware that you have it and that sometimes even white people with good intentions tend to try to put in a voice that overshadows the voices of POC or those without the privilege your possess (male privililge/hetero privilige/etc).
I didn't even know racism like this existed anymore? Wow...guess I have a lot to learn.
woow. this is brilliant
beautiful
Well said respect
Love this.
This definitely helped me understand a bit better how to use my privilege in a positive way.
ohhh it's so happening
Yes!!!!
Yes!
amazing
Sometimes I forget I have white privilege, because I would never think of being prejudiced to someone just because of someone's skin colour. I can't believe people are still so close minded. We're all people
Insightful. Thank you.
This is great
Well!
Sharing with others at STATE OF THE BLACK PARENT!
what an awesome story, thanks for sharing! :D
You nailed it.
AMAZING! Wow, so powerful :)
I love this! It's a good and positive video that shows what "whites" can do to help!
I hope that cashier got fired.
I applaud her. That was absolutely great.
This is beautiful, I have yet to witness this where I live but I'm doing this every time I see some dumb crap like this happening
Wonderful, I guess that's why there are whites out there who care, that's what you can do
Dammn that was an awesome story. Favorited.
wow.....
I don't like this story.
Do we need to depend on white or interracial people to stand up for us?
Black people should be owning their own stores everywhere and secondly using our economic power to decide where we spend our money.
Finally I would have just waited until the cashier was finished and moved on.
damn this makes me angry
woww!
Wow, just wow. So much not what I see in my reality (life experience) being part of the "privileged." For lack of a better term, facing it really sucks. I am a west coast transplant from the Bay Area to Alabama. Lots of things different out here. I am sure I understand the dynamics, but I also surely don't want to accept it. I am also sorry that some of the few have predisposed bias on more of the many.
This is awesomeb
*Round of applause.*
Sad to say but it really helps to have white friends at times lol
Clapssssss, claps, claps...
this is a sad reality that I wish didn't exist. God forgive me if I have ever made anyone (whatever their race) feel this way. I was in years watching that. what right does ANYONE have to make another human being feel like that? it shouldn't happen. ever.
*claps* :)
dat white privilege.
*slow claps*
great video!
Yes!