Shut up pussy you think that girl was getting shit faced with some stranger at her hotel room because she didn't want to cheat? Get fucking real. "Oh my goooosh, I love my husband I caaaaaan't" said every fucking cheater in their life because they are too spineless to take responsibility for the act. Women are way smarter than that dude, you massively underestimate their social knowledge.
He’s not making this stuff up, he’s completely consists to and the stories intertwine when you listen to all of them. There’s a timeline it follows, lies don’t line up so neatly like that. Idk why people claim he lies just because he has good stories and did some crazy stuff in his day
Steven Jones, you’d have painfully less laughter in your life. I’m so glad I saw the clip of Tom Segura telling Rogan his Joey Diaz on an airplane story. I had to find out who they were talking about, and it was my initial introduction to him.
“Everybody’s scared because we buy into Greece when we young, like we have to sing to a b1tchh” that murdered me 😂😂 first time I ever heard uncle Joey say the same story. He told the Laurie jack story on the Joe Rogan podcast 😂
I tell people how wild the 80s were , even for Normal Guys , and these young kids do not believe it .. Smacking girls on the Ass at work , or going to a Party , with mostly people you work with, and there is Coke on the coffee table like its Candy or mints ..and no one cares .. getting pulled over by the NYPD , drunk as fuck ... flash you PBA card, some pleasant words to let them know you are going straight home, and within 5 seconds you are on your way , with just a warning to " take it easy , ok" try that shit today .
I went to school with this kid named Dj. And this dude would hang out by the gazebo right outside the dorms, play his acoustic guitar while all the friends are drinking and everytime random chicks came to hang out he would just ask em.. “ hey let’s go back to my room and _____ “ worked everytime. Dude was a legend..
"Picking up girls and stealing their money" Classic Uncle Joey XD. Lee still looks like a boiled egg hit a bong btw and still sounds like a kid hiding the fact he's a chronic masturbator xD love y'all
That’s why I love Joey. I have so many stories just like his and I’m afraid to tell anyone. It’s funny when I hear Joey tell those stories but it feels like he’s telling my own story! Hahaha
You should. Unless you're famous or hanging out with similar pieces of shit, you will lose friends left and right and people will talk shit behind your back. I've seen it happen to many guys that thought they were badass by talking about that shit. Fast forward a month later and no one talks to them unless they have to.
Where she'd go hunted in the bathroom lol when she really wants u doesnt matter where but if shes harrassed into shit still doesnt matter if she dont want u like if he doesnt want me not so so said or no cause they watchn 🤪🤑🤩🥰
@@KISS_MY_CONVERSE the shit actually works but if you don’t got drugs you gotta be a decently pretty good looking guy .. not trying to hype myself up or be cocky but I’m a pretty good looking dude and I get more success (at clubs at least) when im real firm about my intentions with girls and being a slight asshole (not to the extent Joey says in the video) .. all that nice guy shit goes out the window at clubs , those hoes are looking for a good time not fuckin Romeo
@@_JM- Joey said himself though that he looked like a bum and still got girls. When girls are horny and you can offer them resources (be it drugs) all the social hierarchies fall apart. In clubs girls are horny. You just gotta act like you're the shit and they can close their eyes when you're giving them good dick and good blow. You gotta go to clubs often though and understand the game and it's a shallow transnational way to have sex so you might as well hire an escort, or work on your physical appearance so to reduce the need to use transactions for sex.
It’s not being an addict that’s amazing, it’s being an addict and making it out and changing your life that is amazing, because some funny as hell things happen to you when your a addict, but being to look back and reflect on them is the funny part
“You’re in my lair , it’s over now” “Nowadays u can’t have tht kind of passion in the bedroom some people would call it rape” “JURREKKA” “U kinds friends on Facebook?” Fav quotes from the ep
![I.N "HALLUCINATION" | [Stray Kids : SKZ-PLAYER]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/n5B5q1Hwt_U/mqdefault.jpg)
Imagine having Joey D as ur dad. Id want bed time stories till I was 55.
I’d shower with him till 65
@@Tristen_Smith I'm ok 😂
Tommy Exler 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Hahahaha 😂
I'd never fuckin get to bed
Lee’s gonna catch a charge listening to uncle Joey lmao
Lmao
aleiterful 😂
Shut up pussy you think that girl was getting shit faced with some stranger at her hotel room because she didn't want to cheat? Get fucking real.
"Oh my goooosh, I love my husband I caaaaaan't" said every fucking cheater in their life because they are too spineless to take responsibility for the act. Women are way smarter than that dude, you massively underestimate their social knowledge.
What? Who are you talking to?
@@What-go8ng you're a dumbass
"Im respectful, im a Catholic, Dont Worry."
Black Sheep Prod. 😂
"'Bout eight minutes later I'm back on her like a Barracuda."
Killed me
It always works lol
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
hahahaha awesome
"I ran home and almost cried"
I love how Joey doesn't try to make himself seem like the baddest dude but is still the best story teller ever.
hahahaha fantastic comment
BEST STORY TELLER EVER.
Yeah,lies.....
@@caroleejohnson1553 your name is carolee you’ve clearly never amounted to anything in life
@@Respondifyourbadattrolling HAHAHA DAMN
Joey "I didn't mug her completely" Diaz
this would fukn be a great t shirt hahaha
hahaa
@@StuartFuckingLittle I N I I
I n
i concur. _100%_ true!!
"So I took her shoe off and she started crying again..." -Diaz
“She started crying again so I gave her some space…8 mins later I was back on her like a barracuda.”. 🤣🤣🤣
Classic 😂😂😂😂
This is the only podcast that the host just tells his guests stories about himself and it's brilliant every time. Gotta love Joey Diaz!
Stingray Bdub it’s fucking funny ass shit 😂😂😂😂👍
😅😅😅😅😅🤣🤣🤣
Lmaooo true!
Hes got a good imagination anyway
He’s not making this stuff up, he’s completely consists to and the stories intertwine when you listen to all of them. There’s a timeline it follows, lies don’t line up so neatly like that. Idk why people claim he lies just because he has good stories and did some crazy stuff in his day
Joeys life sounds like a fever dream
Steve Hunt it’s actually not Thomas the train it’s that giant ornate egg from pawn stars
For real man
totally dude. 1000% right dude
Lmao
Coke is basically a fever dream after a certain point lmao
“They’re orange, close enough” cheers Joey 🤣
You already told this story with a girl but you changed it
On joe rogan he said they were green ,but who cares
Hairy Asshole dawg he’s a life long hardcore drug addict and this story was like 30 years ago I’m sure orange and green is such a small detail cmon
Jobje Rabbeljee nigga wut
That doesn’t confirm anything, it was eons ago.
“Lou was a pervert, he said he had a connection with the Yankees.” Wtf do those have to do with each other 😂
Bro I’m crying 😂😂😂
It means he catches and pitches, swings both ways
LOL its like some reference from 1987 that he invented while he was high on cocaine
@@magneticdragon1517 you just make that up or is that actually what it means? Cuz I believe you lol
@@CoachCarter102 I made it up 😂😂 but knowing uncle Joey he could mean that
7:36 Joey: “This is Friday night from maybe 4 to 7 in the morning”
Lee: *gasps*
That got me
seriously dude, how did you notice that. so fucking hilarious I'm crying
oh mah gawd 💦
@@psusteelersfan good speakers I guess? haha
@@psusteelersfan he has luxury beats, they're made by doctor dre
This is the most Joey Diaz title ever
michael bobadilla I swear 😂😂😂
Joey ”i had a friend growing up, stinky” Diaz
As soon as I heard that I knew it was going to be a good story
@@JorgeLopez-yf3ys lol
Seriously i dont know what i would do without Joey diaz and his stories.
Steven Jones, you’d have painfully less laughter in your life. I’m so glad I saw the clip of Tom Segura telling Rogan his Joey Diaz on an airplane story. I had to find out who they were talking about, and it was my initial introduction to him.
Get a life and makes your brain healthy
"she starts to cry" - Lee laughs hysterically
“I take the shoe off she starts to cry again”
🏃♂️🏃♂️🏃♂️☠️
When lee repeated “gave her a bump to soften her up” I was done 😂😂😭
Joey's use of the phrase "it's over" is absolutely tremendous
It smelled like a gyro LMAO
🤢🤣
Ew, joeys
@@FullMetalAtheist he pronounced it wrong but it's a Greek sandwich
I spit out my drink when he said that
Funniest part of story imo
GOAT words for $800 Alex
“Nobody goes out, to go home alone”
- Joey Días
“Don’t worry I’m a catholic” 💀🤣
"I let the tequila kick in and back off" "I'm respectful I'm a Catholic" 😂😂😂😂😂. My new fav. Story...another awesome one is What Turns You On The Most
“Everybody’s scared because we buy into Greece when we young, like we have to sing to a b1tchh” that murdered me 😂😂 first time I ever heard uncle Joey say the same story. He told the Laurie jack story on the Joe Rogan podcast 😂
Got me good too 🤣
Grease not Greece you momo
@@bobbypugachev6425 🤣
Name a Joey Diaz story that doesn't involve coke 😂😂
The time he was selling microdot LSD tabs😁
Hospital tales
@@Ambientgram he was doing coke then too
That time he got revenge on a nun
wb the short story of him when he ate a 500mg thc chocolate bar
When Gomez tells his story, he's a scumbag..
But when Joey tells his stories, he's a fkn legend 🙌🏼😂
If Gomez is the douche with the DEAD hat on he is a scumbag. Simple as that
“Your in my lair it’s over”😭😭
Guys just remember this ain't the 80's you'll get attested saying 2% of what uncle J says🤣 love the guy
I tell people how wild the 80s were , even for Normal Guys , and these young kids do not believe it .. Smacking girls on the Ass at work , or going to a Party , with mostly people you work with, and there is Coke on the coffee table like its Candy or mints ..and no one cares .. getting pulled over by the NYPD , drunk as fuck ... flash you PBA card, some pleasant words to let them know you are going straight home, and within 5 seconds you are on your way , with just a warning to " take it easy , ok" try that shit today .
@@jefffromjersey52 must've been nice
I still talk like that NOW.........FUCK YOUR FEELINGS. My balls dropped when I was 5. Bitches..........on my rim. Jajajjajajajajaja😎
those were better times
"There's a ratio, it's predetermined by the universe" lol
EDIT: ohh shit thats alotta likes damnn
you’re a stupid man
Its true if u don’t believe it thats on you lol
Man get the fuck out of here just going up to a girl and say can I fuck won't work unless you do it to street walkers
It true but beta males won't know that
ruclips.net/video/jjR9F9tPNhc/видео.html universal truth this is not true
Joey "Statute of Limitations" Diaz
Joeys stories always reminds me of my dads stories. The same way they deliver and how they jump all over the place with stories hahaha
"Leave the car there, its over" 😂
I went to school with this kid named Dj. And this dude would hang out by the gazebo right outside the dorms, play his acoustic guitar while all the friends are drinking and everytime random chicks came to hang out he would just ask em.. “ hey let’s go back to my room and _____ “ worked everytime. Dude was a legend..
Joey grew up with Italians. Pretty obvious. I was a NY coke head. I have similar stories.
Tremendous!
Uhhh tell one
@@TEAMGETHELP It would be great to hear something like Joey's "Lucy Snorebush" story! Tremendous!
Once you are into those all night parties with people, shit really goes down with everyone on 5 drugs.
No Newfriends Good, let them OD, more normal girls for the rest of us.
“8 min later I’m back on her like a barracuda, This time I take her shoes off, she starts to cry again.”😂😂😂
I love how much of a fucking savage Uncle Joey is 😂
When he gets Lee going I always lose it 😂
"Picking up girls and stealing their money" Classic Uncle Joey XD.
Lee still looks like a boiled egg hit a bong btw and still sounds like a kid hiding the fact he's a chronic masturbator xD love y'all
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
"We buy into Grease - they can sing"
😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣😭😭😭😭☠☠☠
“Smelled like a gyro” I almost passed out
"I'm on the floor with the octopus hand, trying to reach her jeans."🤣😭😭⚰️💀⚰️💀
"it's 11:30 and my coke dealer closes at 1" 😂😂😂 love ya uncle joey 💯💯
Joey "I'm back on her like a barracuda" Diaz
“One night I was fucked up...” is the opening to almost every Joey Diaz story.
batman has a batcave Joey diaz has a coke lair
Lol
your in my lair
Batmans got a batcave Joeys got a Fat Rock
😂😂😂🤣🤣
Joey “ I had an Italian American Indian friend” Diaz
That’s why I love Joey. I have so many stories just like his and I’m afraid to tell anyone. It’s funny when I hear Joey tell those stories but it feels like he’s telling my own story! Hahaha
You should. Unless you're famous or hanging out with similar pieces of shit, you will lose friends left and right and people will talk shit behind your back.
I've seen it happen to many guys that thought they were badass by talking about that shit. Fast forward a month later and no one talks to them unless they have to.
Where she'd go hunted in the bathroom lol when she really wants u doesnt matter where but if shes harrassed into shit still doesnt matter if she dont want u like if he doesnt want me not so so said or no cause they watchn 🤪🤑🤩🥰
That story about the Fairview chick needs to be animated 🤣
Joey diaz knows How to make Morally incorrect shit like robbing and stealing sound so funny and entertaining.
3:40 Joey got that drip 💧 in his throat 😂😂
Everything you need to know about Joey Diaz in one short video 🤣🤣🤣 I love this man
Joey Diaz is my fucking hero
thanks Joey for the advice. I will try all this out this weekend at the club.
how'd it go?
@@djxkoxxf6898 it didn't work at all. I guess I'm not gangsta enough
@@KISS_MY_CONVERSE the shit actually works but if you don’t got drugs you gotta be a decently pretty good looking guy .. not trying to hype myself up or be cocky but I’m a pretty good looking dude and I get more success (at clubs at least) when im real firm about my intentions with girls and being a slight asshole (not to the extent Joey says in the video) .. all that nice guy shit goes out the window at clubs , those hoes are looking for a good time not fuckin Romeo
@@_JM- Joey said himself though that he looked like a bum and still got girls. When girls are horny and you can offer them resources (be it drugs) all the social hierarchies fall apart. In clubs girls are horny. You just gotta act like you're the shit and they can close their eyes when you're giving them good dick and good blow. You gotta go to clubs often though and understand the game and it's a shallow transnational way to have sex so you might as well hire an escort, or work on your physical appearance so to reduce the need to use transactions for sex.
Lee giggling like a schoolgirl makes it that much better
15:02 that sound he makes....😂😂😂😂
That muffler nearly stunk I ate it... straight savage
"You can't even be passionate like this anymore, they call it rape today" yup lmao
cause it was….
i love joey but fuck man it’s a lil disturbing how many people find that story funny. but maybe that’s just me.
@@Ace.Yvonneit's definitely fucked up but it was just a different time, as they say...
3:41 Joey enjoying 'the drip' off the blow
And this is why God gave Joey daughters. God had to show him with his own visual aids that u are to treat woman with respect. Lol. Hilarious story.
That's called karma. Not GAWD
@@robinsharkey6658 oh whoops. Didnt mean to offend u. 😂
Imagine if Joey had a Joey Jr oh god
Pretty sure his wife gave him daughters
@@chriscraven9335 it's even commitment in both parties
Joey "You're in my lair" Diaz // Joey "I'm back on her like a barracuda" Diaz lmaooo
"Just show her the rock. Ya give her a taste.."
Joey Diaz could make a story about going to buy some milk sound epic.
Joey “Can I smell em’?” Diaz
This is depraved even by uncle joeys standard
LIKE A BARRACUDA
This guy makes being a drug addict sound amazing
That's funny
it’s not
From knowing drug addicts some dead Id say the great thing is to be clean and alive being able to laugh at the misery of being an addict
it's great if you got money
It’s not being an addict that’s amazing, it’s being an addict and making it out and changing your life that is amazing, because some funny as hell things happen to you when your a addict, but being to look back and reflect on them is the funny part
Uncle Joey's the one you want to party with! He's full of great stories and he's definitely the one to have your back!
“Sometimes you gotta beat the clock dawg, know what am sayin” 😂😂😂
The gift that keeps on giving, we love you uncle Joey!
The way he said "Coconut Grove" I thought he said "Coke and a grope".
15:06 “I hit the Ja-Reeka”😭
They didn't come to see Disney characters..lol.
They came to snort & fuck!
“I hate condoms”
Says the guy who looks like he has kids that barely know him
That dude looks like a grade A douchebag .
@@jamesroboyle yeah haha
@@jamesroboyle he really isnt lol
Where are his eyes
He actually has an adult daughter that he doesn't talk to.
Having a bad day? Listen to Uncle Joey! Great story I laughed my ass off.
"Sometimes you gotta beat the clock, you know what I'm sayin" Best Joey line of all time.
It's a ratio!
"I gave her a bump, to soften her up"😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣
☑️ Give her a taste.... show her the rock 😂
2:12 we’ll then they owe you 😂😂😂😂wtf
"the ratio is predetermined by the universe" 😂
“You’re in my lair , it’s over now”
“Nowadays u can’t have tht kind of passion in the bedroom some people would call it rape”
“JURREKKA”
“U kinds friends on Facebook?”
Fav quotes from the ep
He said they were green panties when he was on Joe Rogan... Close enough!
Joey "steal's your girl for a night he doesn't remember" Diaz
Uncle Joey breathing haha
"if I'm the one being hunted, it fucks my game up" 🤣 I felt that
9:15 and on is such a tremendous story. Uncle Joey can spin one hell of a yarn I haven’t laughed so hard in a while
I spit my water at 15:03 LMFAOOOO
14:49 Octopus hand I'm dying😂
“It smelled like a gyro.” That would be a first.
“I go, this is my victim for the night “ 😂😂
It's hilarious because I remember Joey's stories better then he does.
Like saying the panties were green in a different podcast, then again knowing Joey it could have been a different chick.
Joey "you're in my lair, it's over" Diaz
Joey a OG. Respect to those who dont give af and tell it like it is💯
"It smells like a gyro" LMAO
I backed off give er air 😂😂😂😂
I cry laughing at Joey diaz's stories EVERY time omg 😂😂😂
He’s preaching
Its true..being Friends on Facebook makes everything better. 😂
'i take the shoe off, she starts to cry again.' DEAD
RIP Pops.Yo If we ever lose Joey im done.
DUDE! BEST TITTLE EVEAAAA! Much love!
Nobody:
Joey: so this one night i had a bunch of coke..
13:48 “again” 🤣💀