A Male Perspective on Dating | + Career Fulfillment and "Selling Out"
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- Опубликовано: 26 сен 2024
- EP 71 - Hater Hour: Interrogating My Boyfriend + Career Fulfillment and Dating Crimes
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In this special edition of Caroline's alleged "solo" episode, she is joined by her boyfriend, Justin. Justin chimes in to share a male perspective on all your questions - including what it’s like to date our resident hater, his perspective on dating apps, when it might make a little sense to “sell out” in your career, and so much more. They also debate various “dating crimes and misdemeanors” and can’t help but end it on…forearm strengthening tips? Don’t miss all the nasty boi phrases Caroline made Justin say in this special edition episode!
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Not for Everyone is a podcast hosted by one hater (Caroline Winkler) and one lover (Jess DeBakey), with new episodes every Thursday.
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This episode was produced by none other than our prince, @abinewhouse.
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𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐂𝐋𝐀𝐈𝐌𝐄𝐑
All opinions are our own. We are not therapists or mental health professionals, or really professional of any kind. Please see your own professional or counselor for professional support. Do your research and be safe!
Intro Music: “Doja Dance” by PALA
#podcast #selfhelp #comedypodcast #bestfriends
Protect Justin by any means necessary because he is an endangered species.
😂😂😂 best comment!!
Justin needs his own podcast...his voice DEMANDS it!!! His voice is LOVELY 😍
I find Justin's energy and laugh to be deeply comforting.
Caroline, I couldn’t agree more! Men that don’t realize they are talking the entire time and essentially getting a free therapy session are the worst!!
He should be a regular on the podcast. It’s so refreshing to see so much common sense in one person nowadays. Very happy for you, guy! ❤
You seem made for each other. It’s such a rare honor to find someone you feel safe with and also have fun with. Enjoy it! All the best to both of you!
That's so fascinating that was Justin's experience on dating apps! As a woman on the dating apps, I almost always feel like I'm the one who has to do all of the question asking, unless I'm literally on eHarmony. It's always a good sign that I need to take a break from the dating apps when I start counting how many questions I've asked versus he's asked 😅
The guys you’re interested in aren’t interested in you. If they were more interested they’d carry the conversation
Love Justin! Well spoken, good insights, kind voice, thiccck forearms 😅 10/10!
I'm glad you put this up so I can comment! It was nice getting to know Justin! I feel like his personality didn't shine through as much in the videos, which is totally understandable. This time we got more of a feel of who he is as a person. Also, I was wondering which episode featured Jess' boyfriend? I've totally missed that one.
i think she was referring to a jess thoughts episode where jess got his advice on one question. i did think that short bit was profound and would love to hear a jess ft. her bf episode!!!
Episode 55 is the one w Jess’ bf!
@@potsnpaninis Thank you!
His voice is so cool & calming
Love this dialogue. Adult and so normal and informative!
OMG … The “Peace be with you” catcall … I’m laughing so hard I’m crying …. Ahh
Caroline & Justin ~ You two are absolutely adorable and so very well suited ... 💕
You guys sound like you've been doing this together for years. ❤😊 I loved this!
I think the tactic of "assume this person has an amazing personality" has led me to going on far too many dates with men I wasn't actually interested in because if I couldn't tell a guy was cute, I used that tactic, and once I met them, I realized "oh this person is less fascinating and funny and witty than I was hoping." It felt like I had to set the bar crazy high on personality and common interests because I wasn't physically attracted enough, and I don't think that's super fair. It made me view people as my personal entertainers rather than potential partners. It took me awhile to realize that it's actually possible to be shallow about things underneath the surface as well 😅 I don't think love can be formed based on calculations like, "Oh, he's a 7 physically, but..."
It gives me such a warm feeling deep inside to hear you two chatter on. More please. 💛
47:10 such a great point!! Someone i formerly dated would try to "help" me, by changing the subject or cutting me off to then "do something fun/entertaining " and for me, that does NOT WORK! Felt like he didn't care about my feelings/issues, and I would rather work through them in the moment. But evidently, he was only doing what HE would want in this situation (or he listened to someone's "1 fits all" advice).
Like you said, CHECK WITH YOUR PARTNER and then follow suit. I know my father ignores all of his emotions and I know I HAVE TO make a joke to lighten the mood. Everyone's different and eveyone should be aware. It can save lots of friendships and relationships.
I love this podcast, Caroline! 😊 Even MORE, I love how candid and forthcoming both you and Justin are regarding work, priorities, family, relationships, etc. Keep up the good work! 🎉🎉🎉
Already listened on spotify, loved this episode! And you’re right Caroline he sounds very intentional. Get this man a podcast! Happy for you two 😊
I would love to see you both do a first date scenario (obviously not what you guys did on yours as that’s private). It would be great for those of us who haven’t dated in 34yrs and I never went on a ‘date’ with my ex in the beginning and need a crash course. Having Justin’s input on this podcast was insightful and useful.
I enjoyed every moment!
What a smart, funny, thoughtful person! Caroline! Funny and soft hearted. Xxx
This was so much fun!! Thank you for sharing Justin with us! And thank you Justin for being brave and joining in on the fun! Caroline… I love your “lalalalala”!! You are just so darn funny and insightful 🎉 oh! And the candid photos were a fabulous touch!
2nd time listening to this and honestly y'all are just a delight. Peace be with you
Fantastic podcast! Love hearing about the thought processes behind big career decisions, it is so helpful to not get “advice” but to just hear someone’s personal story. Please tell Justin thank you for being so open, I hope you have him back soon to talk more about living life in the big city, dating crimes and misdemeanors, and how to navigate a career and find personal and creative fulfillment. Thanks for an awesome podcast 😎
Loved this episode! You, guys, are an amazingly sweet & fun couple! So happy for you both! Best regards from a regular listener from Ukraine! Hugs
"Are you mad at me?" 😂 love it
Guys, if you had a Patreon I would pay to hear this grounding advice.
Oooh thanks for talking about emotional coping styles and how to make space. Super important and can be v scary
Voices are HUGE for me
Such a great conversation. Thanks for sharing yourselves a bit with us! LOVE.
I absolutely loved this episode! Justin's really down to earth and thoughtful with his responses. I also loved the segment! It was hilarious! I have committed several misdemeanors (being late) to every date. Fashionably.
I’m convinced Alex Anele is gonna be a guest on the pod and I’m literally so stoked and will be so crushed if it isn’t true 😢
Love hearing your honest comments and discussion about “talking on a podcast “ very interesting
Loved this episode, you have to invite Justine again. Sorry I missed the episode with Ryan.
My husband works his forearms too. He calls them the calves of the arm. 😂
More Justin!!!
Thank you for "sharing" a little bit of Justin with us. He seems like a very kind and thoughtful person. I missed Jesses bf podcast? where how
Episode 55- it’s not on RUclips fyi :)
Awww the camping photo ☺️
This is so cute ❤️
You're right about the dating app thing. It can get overwhelming.
Unfortunately I rarely get matches 😭
This was a great episode :) I like listening to you both🎉
I was entertained the whole way through! You two are cute and fun. I'm down for part 2 if you ever want to do another Justoline collab again 😊
"Justin's health is very mental" 😂😂
🇿🇦
If you’re dating your manager….get a new job somewhere else immediately if not sooner!
IMO no new relationship is worth switching jobs for.
Pokemon cards analogy is great (and tragic) for dating apps
Yeah it's not like that for me but it's depressing and icky to remember that's what's usually happening with any given person I'm talking to
Really enjoyed this conversation! Would love more!!😊
OMG performing for the children!!! so TRUE! i used to teach children's yoga and its so exhausting!!! i switched to adults only and i love it so much more!
I'm actually interested in the forearm's exercise tips, I'm trying to gain som grip strength for climbing lol
Great! Interesting at a lot of levels… thank you!
Get married and have babies soon!
I was listening to " the uncomfortable truth about your period" -that episode
3hours ago and the song you guys were guessing,you guys, I guess it's kids by OneRepublic..
Back to this one
So cute together btw🥰
Sad that it’s becoming socially acceptable for anyone to show up for a date late! 😮
Caroline, Justin looks like the actor Tate Donovan. A younger Tate Donovan. He was in several movies and a few episodes of FRIENDS if you remember that show. Check him out.
Welp. This was quite enjoyable! Thanks:)
I'm someone who wants and needs alone time and I have a really hard time communicating that to my husband. He has an anxious attachment style so I'm always having to find a way to tell him I want to be alone without him feeling rejected by that. We're so different in attachment and love language styles that it presents some challenges for the both of us.
My partner is more social than I am, and we have found it helpful for him to pursue a strong network of friends outside of our relationship.
The hardest for us, early on, was that he would get anxious on my behalf and worry about leaving me at home all by myself; he felt like a bad boyfriend. It took some effort to reassure him that I find solitude rejuvenating. I find that it helps to work on some kind of project or do some activity while he is gone, so that I can gush about it to him when he gets back and he can rest assured that I’ve had a good time, too.
Maybe you can try something like that?
Giving a thumbs up and just started listening lol but know it's gonna be good. He gives me Elon vibes 😅
I just comment as I listen, but I've given up on online dating. Found it too exhausting. I like three person approach. I was just getting all my likes and then making a decision which was not the right way at all. I've decided to just join activities and try to meet people in person for now.
Also, loving the take on work life balance. I'm trying to figure out what kind of job to take now. I freelance as a writer and teacher and iit means the pay is low and I have to share an apartment with two guys. I'm ready for my own place and some spending money for sure.
Loving your dynamic by the way. You two give me hope for dating. Wishing the best for both of you.
My college is 50% online and it's basically impossible to make friends in those classes
I agree with the voice thing. It's why I watch or don't watch a RUclipsr for example.
Not three bad at all. Definitely need to work on the wings & lippy & brows. Love the choice of colors. 👏👍
Around 30 minutes in regarding "selling out." I appreciate your thoughts on this. I never thought of it that way...a vocation. Like people who work for a church. Your life is not your own and the pay usually sucks. (Speaking from experience).
I love you two together
salt life is slut life, will never not see it (and prefer it)
Would love Jess thots also on here when y'all have the time ❤
Already on it! Will be up next week!
Yessssssssss
Your bf is getting a lot of airtime
Such a great idea - thanks for including us YT-ers as I only access your content thru YT: I have become a mega fan (from boring/lame PDX with Paige & only bookstores, haha). I am already sporting a hat trying to spread the love (and pepper some hate)!! ~Linz 🩷
You should explore attachmemt styles and strategies. Sounds as if Caroline is more on the Avoidant side and he's on the Anxious side. It makes it easier to understand why we behave the way we do when under stress in relationship.
The part about how you can train your forearms was actually something that I really needed to hear, so thanks!
Justin is lovelyyyy
Fabulous. 👏
I understand both of you guys views on « selling out », and I admit many self-proclaimed anticapitalists often romanticize struggle, especially financial struggle, as a proof of commitment to your values over other things in life. But I think the view of many anti capitalists, including myself as more or less a democratic socialist, is that there SHOULD NOT be such a huge compromise to make between comfort and doing a meaningful job. Rather than pointing out individuals who sell out, understanding how the system creates the choice rather than criticizing the person making it. Capitalism values high profit, high margin, low quality and fast ways to production. So, in order to have money, you’ll have to work in these adjacent job. On the other hand, job whose value is not fast or very computable do not get compensated the same or fairly at all. And that shouldn’t be the case, these positions should not be occupied by people for whom we glamorize the « sacrifice ». And that’s why being anti capitalists sometimes makes you think outside these very closed doors of capitalism.
“Long time listener, first time podcaster”. Heh heh I like this guy already.
1:17:24 haha soooooo fking accurate
I lost a friend from swiping right on her older brother