If you want to calm an aggressive person, use these 3 words

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  • Опубликовано: 20 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 1,3 тыс.

  • @TheKillingMachine-v4c
    @TheKillingMachine-v4c 2 года назад +3033

    Lex's communication skills are next level.
    Like how carefully he uses each and every word is really impressive.
    It simply shows that a person is kind and smart at the same time.

    • @CoolPapaJMagik
      @CoolPapaJMagik 2 года назад +60

      Nah... he may have seemed calm but he was very manipulative

    • @funincluded
      @funincluded 2 года назад

      He jumped down Yes throat every time he pointed out someone is Jewish, but is happy to categorize evil white men- in a way that indicates being white is powerful and that they are evil.

    • @lukeburas4271
      @lukeburas4271 2 года назад +6

      @@CoolPapaJMagik in what ways? I have not watched it

    • @resir9807
      @resir9807 2 года назад +37

      Agreed. It's hard talking to an adult with the mental faculties of a 6 year old

    • @CoolPapaJMagik
      @CoolPapaJMagik 2 года назад +44

      @@lukeburas4271 every time Kanye brings up a point he wants lex to address or even wants lex to understand why he would feel the way he does, lex brings up the h o l o c o s t to guilt him out of pursuing any further

  • @sultanmohammed4944
    @sultanmohammed4944 Год назад +216

    Summary:
    1-listen deeply and make the other person feel heard
    2-use a calm, slow voice
    3-criticise specific behaviour
    4-when you agree in something,tell them
    5-express empathy
    6-be vulnerable when you feel a negative emotion
    7-accept playful breaks
    8-give them a reputation they like and want to live up to

    • @danieljakistam9409
      @danieljakistam9409 Год назад

      Unless they're jewish. Then you can only praise them.

    • @kathrynhumphreys2467
      @kathrynhumphreys2467 Год назад +1

      This is super helpful thank you for taking the time to make this list

    • @ITMT.
      @ITMT. Год назад

      Don’t forget the constant referencing to the holocaust in order to shut down the conversation. Past tragedies can’t be used to restrict a discussion now. Especially those that are questionable in their finer details.

  • @tomtom21194
    @tomtom21194 2 года назад +1807

    Lex has repeatedly surprised and impressed me in a lot of his podcasts. I don't think his guests, especially the more volatile ones are used to such a calm, thoughtful interviewer who doesn't play with egos. He asks, he makes dry jokes but never mocks the one he is talking to. He finds things he agrees with and tells them and points out what he doesn't in a way that isn't seen as an attack. He is really impressive.

    • @alypha737
      @alypha737 2 года назад +6

      but why he mad at JM tho its fucken true

    • @aburoach9268
      @aburoach9268 2 года назад +25

      @@alypha737 🤦‍♂

    • @NotGilmore
      @NotGilmore 2 года назад +1

      Yeah it feels like he had training with Chris Voss 😂

    • @arottie4097
      @arottie4097 2 года назад

      Meh

    • @scottwillie6389
      @scottwillie6389 Год назад +1

      Ye broke him though. Totally caused Lex to lose his cool and throw off his mask.

  • @illyastheprof
    @illyastheprof 2 года назад +1677

    Man, Piers has become the gold standard on what NOT to do in a conversation lol. The man attempts "gotcha" moments in every single sentence.

    • @WanderTheNomad
      @WanderTheNomad 2 года назад +55

      It depends on what you want from the conversation. If you want to "win" and have the other person look bad and you look good, Piers' way might be better. If you want to "win" and come away from the conversation with a mutual understanding and a positive relationship, Lex's way is probably better.

    • @ethanstump
      @ethanstump 2 года назад +19

      @@WanderTheNomad but few people actually want to live like that, making people look bad, and generally they don't actually like it, coming from someone who has done that. that being said, i often do think it's a false dichotomy, to believe that it's either possible to foster positive relationship's, or to be correct. you can be both or neither at the same time, you can be correct and respectful, or correct and disrespectful, and generally i do believe that more people will examine their belief's when they don't feel disrespected. that being said, i do believe some people are too far gone, and even with being logical and respectful, there are some people you just won't reach. but if you have a decent mix of both, you will be far more effective than if you are just logical, or just loving.

    • @WanderTheNomad
      @WanderTheNomad 2 года назад +7

      @@ethanstump Yea I'm talking specifically when you have a conversation with someone while you have an audience. It would make little to no sense to talk like Piers Morgans does if you have no one else watching.

    • @ethanstump
      @ethanstump 2 года назад +16

      @@WanderTheNomad but even with an audience, i do think even Lex's method is superior, maybe in not in term's of reaching the widest audience, but convincing the widest amount of people. but then, a lot of the TV personalities don't actually care about being convincing, as long as the paycheck is bigger than the other guys.

    • @kareandersson
      @kareandersson 2 года назад +6

      In his talk with Jordan Peterson he proudly announce himself as a clinical psychopath.

  • @MrHoofington
    @MrHoofington 2 года назад +772

    My best technique is the Socratic method aka just asking questions and letting them explore their own ideas. You can pick holes in their argument if you want by asking leading questions, but don't do this too much or they'll feel cornered, you need to make it clear that you're genuinely trying to learn their perspective.

    • @vermiliongourd4619
      @vermiliongourd4619 2 года назад +31

      This can be condescending if you’re the one who needs to reflect your thinking too

    • @noompsieOG
      @noompsieOG 2 года назад +3

      I agree with you. Although I have never needed to pick any holes , I ask 1 maybe 2 questions and people either retreat or use a common argument fallacy. So what you mean is be more careful with my questions ? That seems like work , and tbh I’d rather admit I’m wrong and they are right so I don’t have to waste any more time or energy

    • @vermiliongourd4619
      @vermiliongourd4619 2 года назад +9

      @@noompsieOG man, these are terrible responses. Are we just incapable of having dialogue? Why do you feel the need to “agree but actually disagree and walk away”?

    • @noompsieOG
      @noompsieOG 2 года назад +4

      @@vermiliongourd4619 easier 🤷‍♂️ I’m just lazy

    • @Gruso57
      @Gruso57 2 года назад +3

      This is a bit too close to machiavellianism. You shouldn't lead who you are talking to into traps. Are you talking to someone to "dismantle" their views or are you talking to someone to learn?

  • @calumcooper3295
    @calumcooper3295 2 месяца назад +2

    I had a massive argument with a friend today. Or rather, we had an argument last week but we met to talk it over today. When preparing what to say I thought of this video after watching it ages ago (probably when it first came out), and looked it up again to rewatch it.
    I genuinely think I used every single technique highlighted (not really through trying, but the right situations just kept coming up), and it fully turned the conversation from something that could have been pretty ugly into an amicable exchange. No advice was ever going to stop me and this person disagreeing with each other on some things, but I can say for sure that I feel like I came away having conducted myself with respect and integrity, while being able to listen and own up to the things I was guilty of.
    Thank you Charisma on Command. I know you're not making videos anymore but this one was a significant help to me regardless, and I'm very thankful.

  • @eyoelgashaw5089
    @eyoelgashaw5089 2 года назад +59

    As a person from Ethiopia, since you gave a colossal charity, I would love to say thank you for your generosity

  • @judylandry302
    @judylandry302 2 года назад +135

    When I'm feeling angry and hateful, I hate everyone and everyone hates me. But when I smile, even if I don't feel like it, and acknowledge people they smile back and are kind, and then I like them back. So simple, and I feel so much better, and so do they.

    • @petegasperson6309
      @petegasperson6309 2 года назад +9

      That might be the most valuable thing I have seen written in an online comment, anywhere, ever.

    • @luisman369
      @luisman369 2 года назад +2

      That's wholesome and all and it genuinely works at times depending of the gravity of our mental well being at the moment. But to do that as a kind of motto is a direct path to superficiality, shallowness and toxic positivity.

    • @Lyonessi
      @Lyonessi 2 года назад

      Thanks Judy I'm going to try this

  • @TakeBackYourMind997
    @TakeBackYourMind997 2 года назад +126

    Criticising specific behaviours and not the person as a whole is really good advice. Lex seems to always see the good in people and shine a light on that in conversation, that really helps with people being more receptive to criticism and less defensive.

    • @222taxation8
      @222taxation8 Год назад

      Have you watched it? Have Fr watched it? He was trynna hoe

  • @Chuby_ubesie
    @Chuby_ubesie 2 года назад +133

    This guy proves that it takes love to overcome hate

    • @akun10years10
      @akun10years10 2 года назад +2

      I prefer deception

    • @bryanutility9609
      @bryanutility9609 2 года назад +1

      He loves money and fame

    • @MattMussett
      @MattMussett Год назад +1

      Love is powerful.

    • @QWERTY-gp8fd
      @QWERTY-gp8fd Год назад

      @@MattMussett bravery, fear , hate is more powerful.

    • @alfredharrison597
      @alfredharrison597 Год назад +2

      If people will allow it, love will overcome hate every time. But people need to ALLOW this.

  • @RussellClausse
    @RussellClausse 2 года назад +526

    our enemy is not the person who we are arguing against, but our own ego lol
    shit's just so hard to put down and actually listen to the other person but its so important to push through and maintain that state of calm... lex is fantastic at that💯

    • @wellnesspathforme6236
      @wellnesspathforme6236 2 года назад

      Ego is code for deep internal Fe-ar and insecurity. What is called the ego is the response to thr deep Fe-ar and insecurity.
      Metallic iron filings rust out the nervous system, uoregulate the sympathetic nervous system, which then drains blood from the prefrontal cortex.
      And here we are.
      Put down the toxic metallic iron infused into the processed foold supply based on lies.
      Let me know if you more details...

    • @RussellClausse
      @RussellClausse 2 года назад +3

      @@wellnesspathforme6236 for now, but I am open to considerations, but I think that we do need a small amount of ego to achieve true confidence. In my opinion, one cannot exist without the other

    • @wellnesspathforme6236
      @wellnesspathforme6236 2 года назад +3

      @@RussellClausse You bring up a great point. There is probably a fair bit of nuance in this complex system. I have more ruminating to do. :-)
      BTW, your point is 100% true. Nothing I said was intended to undermine it. We often are our own worst enemy because of "ego" and all its dimensions.

    • @RussellClausse
      @RussellClausse 2 года назад +2

      @@wellnesspathforme6236 haha yes of course! Such a complex system that will take us many years to get a grasp of, maybe never in our lifetimes!
      Someone recommended i read the book the power of now to change my viewpoint on ego, i had already purchased it and im gonna give it a read sometime 🙏

    • @wellnesspathforme6236
      @wellnesspathforme6236 2 года назад +1

      @@RussellClausse It is an excellent book and worth the read. Tolle's appearance is over-the-top "fufu" to me, but the data in the book is good.
      There is a metabolic component, IMHO.
      Iron overload and hyperacidosis produce bad outcomes, but that's not to say the absence of those provides good outcomes. The Money Power Famikies are alkaline bloodline narcissists out to genocide all other bloodlines, so there is that. lol
      I recommend the following four books to prime your metabolism for a "high energy/vibration level." Literally, active and efficient mitochondrial energy production.
      1. Cure Your Fatigue
      2. The pH Miracle (revised and updated)
      3. The Soy Zone (Zone Diet, soy is relatively higher in copper and it is alkaline)
      4. Irritable Brain Syndrome (and how to go after acid producing and tissue damaging candida).
      ...
      The soy boy narrative is mostly nonsense. First, in general they don't eat soy. But they do eat metallic iron filings like they are a year end sale. The first book is by the creator of The Root Cause Protocol. He explains the iron overload stuck in the tissues where not measured dynamic. He probably has almost 200 interviews on RUclips.
      Biology of Belief is another good book that Kit Campbell covers in Irritable Brain Syndrome and in interviews.
      Also, toxic seed oil should be avoided.
      Udo's Oil and similar high quality oils are about the only option, but don't heat them. I vacuum seal them with wine vacuum seal systems.

  • @1LadyM7
    @1LadyM7 2 года назад +441

    Lex Friedman is probably one of the most impressive men I've seen in a while. I've been listening to him on his podcast for a while now and I am absolutely in love with his thought process and the way he handles himself and his guests. The Ye interview just took all of that to a whole new level.

    • @SiriusSphynx
      @SiriusSphynx 2 года назад

      @Black Lesbian Poet And you just like the security of an echo chamber

    • @lookatthisbizarre2940
      @lookatthisbizarre2940 2 года назад +16

      lex is a very weird guy, i feel like he cons people with his calm way of speaking but there is something going on with him. i dont trust him at all he seems fake

    • @trey9775
      @trey9775 2 года назад +11

      The devil is known for smooth words. Lex is gaslighting tf outa Ye

    • @scottv8124
      @scottv8124 2 года назад

      @@chiccavaquita the music and film industry is primarily run by Jewish people. That's provable fact. Kanye is in the music business and is an artist, his art is owned by people who aren't creative. Creative people tend to suffer more from mental illness because they question things and want to see things from a different angle and unless you're either highly connected and willing to do what you're told or highly creative you cant make a living in the arts. Book smart, rich kids fit into society very well because they're accepting and will get the well paying jobs, lay on top of their wives, have kids, make money, believe the news, vote and go on nice vacations. Lex, and the like would never question why wtc7 randomly collapsed, why a group of Israeli art students were having an 'art' project on the 91st floor of the wtc or why we went to Vietnam after jfk was murdered. Those people are good at managing life, accepting it for what it is and for the most part being at minimum, content

    • @ebonix33
      @ebonix33 2 года назад

      No he is not.... lex didn't give af what ye was saying... he just cared about the Jewish BS

  • @zoeythewhitelioness
    @zoeythewhitelioness Год назад +18

    This might be one of the most important videos I've ever seen regarding my own life and how to deal with conflict.

  • @JKNACK3
    @JKNACK3 2 года назад +92

    This interview was THE FIRST time I heard of Lex. I was IMPRESSED and found the whole interview great to watch and see how both handled it. Lex has incredible control and can easily steer the convo in the ways he wants. He gained a sub that day, and really helped me see that I needed to calm down while dealing with people I disagree with, and really HEAR them more than I already am. Thanks for not painting Ye in such a bad light either, He's not crazy, just not taught well in how to speak or react like Lex or one of your subscribers. Love the video gang, thanks for informing others!

    • @MrFrussel
      @MrFrussel 2 года назад +3

      If you want to listen more of his more 'human' conversations, I would highly recommend the following episodes.
      317 , 312, 311, 310, 301 ( highly recommended) , 288, 278 , 276, 272 ,255 , 228, 196 , 169 , 140
      Not to say the others aren't great, but they tend to be a bit more technical.

    • @davidbrook9686
      @davidbrook9686 2 года назад

      This point is Lex level and articulated my exact experience as well. Especially the point about calming down when dealing with people I disagree with.

    • @teovu5557
      @teovu5557 2 года назад +4

      Lex a respected computer scientist, artificial intelligence researcher and a professor at M.I.T. As well as a BJJ black belt who competed against BJJ legends like Gary Tonon, musician and a successful Podcaster at 39 years old
      He also has an IQ of 180(Einstein had an IQ of 200) . lex is a beast and super chill guy all once.

  • @Ben.Stevenson
    @Ben.Stevenson 2 года назад +53

    Lex has really built a next level podcast and next level interviewing skills

  • @matthewr7593
    @matthewr7593 2 года назад +254

    I loved this video, thank you for it. I loved how at the end Ye and Lex were closer and more open about their desire to spread love than ever before. And Ye apologized to him, not that that matters in itself, but it just shows he wanted to express to Lex that he cared about him and wouldn't want to hurt him. That's powerful.

    • @RodrigoOswego
      @RodrigoOswego 2 года назад +2

      Lex seemed angry and his tolerance seemed forced throughout the entire interview. At the end he said something along the lines of "nothing is promised but death" which seemed like a thinly veiled threat or prophecy.

    • @N1rOx
      @N1rOx 2 года назад +6

      @@RodrigoOswego 😂😂😂 comedy gold

    • @marceelino
      @marceelino Год назад +3

      @@RodrigoOswego "nothing is promised but death", it just means you do not know what the future holds, we only know that our lives end in death.

  • @RyanMfRodriguez
    @RyanMfRodriguez Год назад +80

    Notice Lex’s slow low sounding demeanor? It’s brilliant tactic

    • @sijenkai3928
      @sijenkai3928 Год назад +4

      Lowkey sounds like me when i pulled an all nighter, its better for me to think so slow

    • @kimlarso
      @kimlarso 4 месяца назад +1

      It’s called weed speed

  • @brendenbowers
    @brendenbowers 2 года назад +97

    Lex is a champion. A true role model. His varied guests and exceptionally long form podcast are a great way to get into a subject.

    • @silvermoneydude2044
      @silvermoneydude2044 2 года назад +2

      He's definitely good at playing the victim and talking down to people.

    • @LinkEX
      @LinkEX 2 года назад +12

      @@silvermoneydude2044 Where did Lex talk down to people?
      That is true for some podcast hosts on some topics.
      But of all the interviews I've heard of him, he's actually always been very humble and never tried to push his opinions.

    • @Digger-Nick
      @Digger-Nick Год назад +1

      @@silvermoneydude2044 I don't watch much of him but I'd like to see some examples.

    • @aarorissanen930
      @aarorissanen930 Год назад +1

      @@silvermoneydude2044 "boohoo boohoo babababab" - you

    • @elbowblock6962
      @elbowblock6962 Год назад

      @@silvermoneydude2044 example?

  • @huxleyginsberg13
    @huxleyginsberg13 2 года назад +40

    Well done on this video. Haven’t seen a breakdown as nuanced as this one on this whole mess of a topic.

  • @kinggchile
    @kinggchile Год назад +18

    Thank you for this vid. I just experienced a break up w/ a woman who I thought was going to be my wife, over the most trivial argument, that has still left me dumbfounded. I tried very hard to keep my cool over the course of what was like 2 hrs of nonsense drama, but I eventually wore out and folded. I will practice what was demonstrated in this video and never let anyone get my goat again.

    • @stacys8729
      @stacys8729 Год назад +5

      I don't want to say anything negative about your gf, of course I don't know her. But I think a long term commitment , like a marriage, takes BOTH people working hard to communicate and respect one another. I don't know you, but chin up - we all learn and grow, bit it takes two. Took me a long time to understand that communicating about how we comminicate, as silly as that sounds, is vital.

    • @kinggchile
      @kinggchile Год назад +1

      @@stacys8729 Thank you for the kind words. ❤️

  • @t.b.cont.
    @t.b.cont. 2 года назад +17

    One thing to keep in mind is that hate isn’t a lack of love. It’s not like a void of it, that’s what apathy is. He might be lashing out hatefully, but it’s coming from a point of passion. Even if his hate is fixated on the wrong things.
    You cannot truly win an argument against a person you don’t understand. Having the capacity to empathize where your opponent is coming from is one of the strongest tools you can have in a debate. Your goal in an argument isn’t to crush your opponent but to lift them to your understanding, because you can’t win someone over by alienating them.

    • @dustinpetersen1183
      @dustinpetersen1183 Год назад

      Very well said. Love it.

    • @kimlarso
      @kimlarso 4 месяца назад

      Yep; The opposite of love is indifference…..lack of understanding/care/concern of the other persons stance

  • @noaheye3428
    @noaheye3428 2 года назад +8

    Lex is an emotional genius. He seems slow sometimes but he's really just taking his time to think it through. I would love to give that guy a hug.

  • @golu_badbola
    @golu_badbola Год назад +2155

    Lex looks 25, has intellectual level of 55 while having patience and stoicity of a 75 year old.

    • @tigre9271
      @tigre9271 Год назад +127

      He's Russian. Stoicism is in his DNA

    • @AustenSummers
      @AustenSummers Год назад +5

      Stoicism*

    • @reddogbrew6895
      @reddogbrew6895 Год назад +30

      no. lex friedman said black people can be a group, whites, hispanics and so on can be a group. but as soon as you call out the J team they arent a group and youre a nazi...

    • @scottwillie6389
      @scottwillie6389 Год назад +5

      @@tigre9271 He is most certainly not Russian.

    • @tigre9271
      @tigre9271 Год назад +16

      @@scottwillie6389 Are you sure? Did you research his background?
      Lex Fridman
      Russian-American computer scientist
      Lex Fridman is a Russian-American computer scientist, artificial intelligence researcher, and podcaster. He is known for hosting a podcast and RUclips series, the Lex Fridman Podcast in which he interviews a wide variety of guests.

  • @bryanharrison3889
    @bryanharrison3889 Год назад +38

    Lex is the most underrated host and interviewer probably in human history... There's very few people who are on this gentleman's level.

    • @H0m3r_Simpson
      @H0m3r_Simpson Год назад +3

      Yeah, I like him, and agree with your general praise, but come on... "human history"? That part does the opposite of what you intend to do - it is so ridiculous over the top, that people will try to find flaws in his way of interviewing just to prove your point wrong. So what are you gaining by so bluntly overselling him? I really do not get it.

  • @seth462
    @seth462 2 года назад +183

    Wow!! It was difficult to watch, as I had preconceived notions, but made it to the end and was absolutely stunned by the result. Definitely made me consider the way I will interact. I want to be as good as Lex and bring out the best in myself and others.

    • @MisterWealth
      @MisterWealth 2 года назад +6

      Lex was far from stoic in this, he was mad that Ye pointed out all the people suppressing him in his life are J's. Lex lost his cool more than Ye did.

    • @Smenchevieve
      @Smenchevieve Год назад +10

      @@MisterWealth Ye yelled a few times while Lex never raised his voice. I don't see your point

    • @dismalthoughts
      @dismalthoughts Год назад +3

      @@MisterWealth Lex disagreed with a few things Ye said and how they were framed, and there were a few times he made that clear, but I don't think he ever "lost his cool". He expressed his dissent in a very respectful, calm manner, and I think the evidence for his great handling of the interview is evidenced in the outcome. But it's been a while since I've watched it; I'd love to know which parts you found to show Lex losing his cool. I'm admittedly biased towards Lex and might have overlooked it 😅

    • @76482
      @76482 Год назад +2

      @@dismalthoughts , You didn't over look anything. Some people seem to think it has to mean there's an argument if everyone isn't in agreement or they aren't all saying the exact same thing. I married into a family like that and it's tortuous.. never an exchange of ideas, perspectives, or opinions. Everybody just endlessly parrots what somebody else (usually my MIL) already said.

    • @marceelino
      @marceelino Год назад

      @@Smenchevieve to be fair, you do not have to raise a voice to show your anger. You can calmly hurt other people with just words.

  • @admtech69
    @admtech69 2 года назад +9

    Lexs martial arts training comes through, his is the path of humility and infinite patience.

  • @Dadsinrecovery
    @Dadsinrecovery 2 года назад +38

    Great video. Lex is the Man. Love him. Thanks.

  • @LV_Gaming10
    @LV_Gaming10 2 года назад +22

    He's so calm and it's so rare these days.

  • @davidogundipe808
    @davidogundipe808 2 года назад +15

    I also appreciate how you better people's behavior with video like these thanks.

  • @ryannewman2835
    @ryannewman2835 2 года назад +8

    This is one of the greatest RUclips videos I’ve ever seen. Thank you for producing engaging content that will hopefully make us better people.

  • @IFGchannel931
    @IFGchannel931 2 года назад +72

    Lex is a legend. Sometimes, in normal conversations, his way of talking seems a bit slow or uninterested (also he sounds like he took sedatives right before the interviews, lol). But it's in situations like this that you see his calm and collected style really pays off. Kanye is one of the oddest people out there, but as the saying goes, "those hardest to love are the ones who need it the most". I feel like Lex could pierce through his shell and plant a little seed there.

    • @gnanasabaapatirg7376
      @gnanasabaapatirg7376 2 года назад

      Man his interview with Jordan was painfully slow

    • @sandrar.focseneau4106
      @sandrar.focseneau4106 2 года назад +1

      😂 maybe he did take sedatives. Dealing with Ye, whom I totally like and appreciate, you need to.

    • @kimlarso
      @kimlarso 4 месяца назад

      Weed speed

  • @A-a-ron888
    @A-a-ron888 2 года назад +27

    Lex is such a gem, he goes into the fire of tough conversations here and there and it's so funny cuz he's such a pure hearted guy tackling topics, ideas, realities that are so sinister, vile, dark and twisted sometimes.

  • @FCWW87
    @FCWW87 Год назад +2

    Lex is a different breed. He has incredible insight for a kid. When I was his age I was just starting to make some good life choices and he is out there exemplifying how to interact under intense circumstances.

  • @igorabdoaguilar9331
    @igorabdoaguilar9331 2 года назад +7

    This video is one of your best so far! been following your work since 2019. Learned a lot so far.
    This type od de-escalation and finding mutual agreement, common ground is probably what we are needing the most the contemporary landscape of discussions. Thanks for the content

  • @masterotica
    @masterotica Год назад +1

    This was such an inspiring video, I've watched a lot of debates and interviews in this day age and they usually amount to nothing more than idealogical shouting matches. This was the only time where I felt both sides listened to and understood each other, and one side even walked away with a complete change of heart. We definitely need more of this today's polarized environment.

  • @mochaest1994
    @mochaest1994 2 года назад +9

    thank you for breaking down his interviews because they certainly had me perplexed, and thank you for donating to charity!

  • @radfoo72
    @radfoo72 2 года назад +202

    I watched Lex's full podcast and I gotta say Kanye's joke about why people can't stay mad at him caught me off guard and had me in stitches🤣
    Being able to temporarily ease tension by bringing levity to a conversation despite your disagreement is a strength💪🏼

    • @RianJudge
      @RianJudge 2 года назад +6

      I completely agree😂

    • @rougebaba3887
      @rougebaba3887 2 года назад +16

      And the way Lex responded was the perfect maneuver. The tension just drained from the conversation.

  • @arslongavitabreves
    @arslongavitabreves 2 года назад +3

    Tbh I've never knew anything about this Lex guy, never even watched any of his videos. But just as soon as I finished watching this, I subscribed to the man. He deserves my highest respect.

  • @sulken
    @sulken 2 года назад +7

    Thanks for this video...Language and demeanor are powerful when it comes to how people receive and understand eachother.

  • @Videome123
    @Videome123 Год назад +9

    Lex became a champion/hero in my book. How can you casually and calmly talk to a person filled with so much pain and hatred without losing it at them, especially when they start taking jabs at you and your ancestry... While showing so much empathy towards him.... I don't think I'd be able to do the same

  • @iveneverseenahealthyvegan.9885
    @iveneverseenahealthyvegan.9885 Год назад +1

    This is why conversation is an Art.
    Not many know how it works.
    This has helped many.
    Thank you..🇬🇧

  • @chillokapi5225
    @chillokapi5225 2 года назад +6

    Phenomenal. My mind is more open now after watching this. Thanks for this

  • @GustavoSilva-ny8jc
    @GustavoSilva-ny8jc Год назад +3

    3:45 Lex was amazing here. We're used to the message of using fire to protect our ego and doesn't look like a loser but in an argument it will look ridiculous to a 3rd person. Those emotions lose power after the event.

  • @christopherdanielowski1747
    @christopherdanielowski1747 2 года назад +4

    This was the most beautiful video you've ever made. That was emotionally moving

  • @jasonneugebauer5310
    @jasonneugebauer5310 22 дня назад

    Lex is perhaps the best interviewer on RUclips.
    Lex has awesome skills at connecting with his guest, being kind, listening to understand, allowing the guest to talk and be heard, caring about his guests and puting them at ease, not insinuating or using verbal manipulation, asking insightful relevant questions, letting guests know his thoughts and opinions without being rude/unkind and more.
    Lex. 👍 👍 👍

  • @KaBastian
    @KaBastian 2 года назад +12

    WOW! This video was insanely well put together and will help me so much in the future, thank you for this ❤️

  • @StillnessofMind
    @StillnessofMind Год назад +1

    Let is very, very professional and a high status man. Rare. Bravo Lex.

  • @sylvesterbiersay369
    @sylvesterbiersay369 2 года назад +9

    Thank you for this video and for this insight

  • @simratjitsingh5048
    @simratjitsingh5048 2 года назад +3

    wow the way Lex handled that interview is a different skillset in itself

  • @GrowthMindsetChannel
    @GrowthMindsetChannel 2 года назад +6

    "You have power over your mind - not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength." ~ Marcus Aurelius 🙏😊

  • @BMW1x1
    @BMW1x1 2 года назад +1

    Wow! Lex that was amazing and I have taken notes!

  • @JohnSmith-qx4ff
    @JohnSmith-qx4ff 2 года назад +10

    I’m very conservative with my likes. This may be one of the most useful videos you guys have produced and I’ve personally benefitted from several already. I’ll be revisiting this👍

  • @Myeyesburnbabyburn
    @Myeyesburnbabyburn Год назад +1

    LOVE! It’s hard sometimes when things seem to be so dark and full of chaos. LOVE

  • @alexanderbuchler4048
    @alexanderbuchler4048 Год назад +14

    Lev is next Lexel. It's unreal how skilled he is at steering a conversation.

  • @Monkey_G5
    @Monkey_G5 Год назад

    I recently discovered your channel for myself, and am glad this kind of content is available RUclips. Thank you for the free education.

  • @maudelagarza4972
    @maudelagarza4972 2 года назад +4

    Congratulations on making such a great video on such an amazing conversation. It's a quick guide on getting better in conversations which will make you a better human. This video should be considered before every interview.

  • @TheMusicscotty
    @TheMusicscotty 2 года назад +2

    Just when I think I can't love this channel any more, they prove actions by donating again to charity water. Good gracious. I love you guys!!

  • @Divinii
    @Divinii 2 года назад +13

    This is awesome!
    Can you please do more breakdowns with Lex Fridman? 😮

  • @lilypond5158
    @lilypond5158 2 года назад +1

    I'm so glad you're soing a bit with Lex, he's great, honestly I strive to be so firm but calm

  • @nodaysback1
    @nodaysback1 Год назад +3

    9:17 This is Beautiful.. Thank you Lex and Ye for teaching and illustrating to me that this can be done! It's a Good Thing.
    And Thank you Charisma On Command for highlighting this excerpt of their conversation. If mainstream content predominantly carried this tone and sentiment, it would have a very positive influence.

  • @NA-nz9lv
    @NA-nz9lv Год назад +1

    honestly I've never aspired to be like web personalities because you can't really know how they are in everyday life but what I can say is that I aspire to be as good in conversations as Lex is, every interview he does is great and gives so much insight in both his guests and himself.

  • @EyePlayDrumsBoi
    @EyePlayDrumsBoi 2 года назад +4

    Thank you CoC for picking such a great charity to give to.

  • @kittystetson6737
    @kittystetson6737 2 года назад

    A great man even through pain does the right thing- that was very well said.

  • @awsmness132
    @awsmness132 2 года назад +8

    The way Lex handles this is a truly skillful thing. Being able to articulate his thoughts above the emotions he is feeling. Being able to articulate his emotions so clearly. All with no resentment. Kayne couldn't help but apologies to him in the midst of something so authentic. Lex shows us how to be noble men once again.

  • @MrGauthier3585
    @MrGauthier3585 2 года назад +1

    These principles have been taken from "How to win friends and influence people." They are valid. One of the few books I read more than once.

  • @Ericarothwellunravel
    @Ericarothwellunravel Год назад +3

    Wow Lex is incredible. I've never heard of him before.

  • @83mosco
    @83mosco Год назад

    I love his interviews. My favorite thing to fall asleep, too because I'm falling asleep pondering something worthwhile

  • @SparkBerry
    @SparkBerry 2 года назад +65

    Lex is the best thing to happen to the RUclips podcast space in years. If you don't follow him, I suggest you do.

    • @Enigma_408
      @Enigma_408 2 года назад +4

      Whys that ?

    • @TheChosenOne2023
      @TheChosenOne2023 2 года назад +2

      What's different between him and Joe Rogan?

    • @Chazzmatazz
      @Chazzmatazz 2 года назад +11

      ​@@TheChosenOne2023 Intelligence, openness/courage and self discipline as an interviewer. Lex>Rogan in all three.

    • @romanianhustler3309
      @romanianhustler3309 2 года назад

      @@Chazzmatazz cope

    • @ipsygypsy16
      @ipsygypsy16 2 года назад

      Where does one find him & his podcasts, please?

  • @salvatoreharvey3520
    @salvatoreharvey3520 2 года назад

    I’m two videos into your channel. Already, as an “introverted person”, I’m looking forward to watching/listening to the rest of your videos and the videos to come.

  • @MrClearlySpeak
    @MrClearlySpeak 2 года назад +35

    Lex is a pretty strong interviewer, definitely one of the best.

  • @AndrewRMontoya
    @AndrewRMontoya 2 года назад +5

    Great breakdown

  • @onafehts
    @onafehts 2 года назад +2

    I didn’t have the stomach to listen to the whole conversation between Lex and Kanye, but this video made me want to go back to it to learn something from Lex’s way of empathizing

  • @mandarmn
    @mandarmn 2 года назад +23

    Great breakdown of the 2 situations. Question: what happens a few days after? Does Ye change his behaviour towards all? Or does he reflect? Or is it just going to be one individual at a time?

    • @Vampress09
      @Vampress09 2 года назад +5

      That's what I'm thinking. There are people are just beyond any reasoning. They have dug their feet in at their stance and won't budge no matter how you approach them.

    • @iambojangles4115
      @iambojangles4115 2 года назад +10

      I noticed in Ye's Insta posts shortly after the interview he stopped saying "Jewish media" and said something like red media.. can't remember the term exactly and he deletes his posts but that struck me as development.

  • @dragonfish888
    @dragonfish888 Год назад +1

    I feel sleepy every time I listen to Lex. His pace is melodic.

  • @tHa1Rune
    @tHa1Rune Год назад +5

    What about a video on how to remain stoic when being abused/incessantly harassed verbally?

  • @passby8070
    @passby8070 Год назад +1

    Lex is one of my favourite podcasters, this Video really boils down the essence of why he is such an engaging interviewer to listen to no matter who he is interviewing.

  • @johnjosmith42
    @johnjosmith42 2 года назад +4

    Must say, this was a great vid 👏 thank you 🇬🇧

  • @janzalud216
    @janzalud216 2 года назад +1

    this is so valuable. i try to ease the arguments in corporate workplace setting by these ways too. I fail often (as by nature im a rather selfish, opinionated person), but i am somewhat less horrible person to be around (according to how the feedbacks have been developing).

  • @FromGroundToMud
    @FromGroundToMud 2 года назад +6

    I get (and even share) the point Kanye is trying to make, but I agree with Lex on how to articulate the communication of that point.

    • @adamlevy8971
      @adamlevy8971 2 года назад +3

      I'm not clear on what Kanye's point was. Could you clarify that for me?

  • @CanWeGetDeep
    @CanWeGetDeep 2 года назад

    The movie scenes and interview scenes going on in the background are perfect, and extremely relevant to what the narrator is saying. If you’ve seen the movies, it’s just perfect.

  • @mimimerlot77
    @mimimerlot77 2 года назад +8

    Very important topic. I wish I could find the right words without losing my calm like Lex.
    How do you handle someone who is prone to long monologues and literally doesn't listen to what you're saying? (talking about my father who only looks up from his lecture when you start screaming...) That's been bugging me for a lifetime - I really would like to have a real discussion with him sometimes instead of a one sided speech and just don't know how to do that.

    • @sofiaescobar4455
      @sofiaescobar4455 2 года назад +3

      That must be incredibly frustating, just imagining it in my head makes me upset :/. I hope you find some things that work for your specific situation within the variety of amazing videos and resources on the internet. Good luck!

  • @cutrugs5676
    @cutrugs5676 2 года назад

    One of my favorite channels talking on one of my favorite channels! Thanks for highlighting the genius of Lex in this interview!

  • @WilliamChan
    @WilliamChan 2 года назад +26

    Lex is too humble for how skilled he is, but that's what I love about him

  • @bkkaranja2873
    @bkkaranja2873 2 года назад

    Thanks for Juxtaposing the 2 interviews ... Very insightful what it takes to go into an interview to argue versus going in to listen and understand...

  • @davidogundipe808
    @davidogundipe808 2 года назад +9

    You should also do the Ronaldo and Pierce interview and how to better yourself with it, or something like that.

  • @ffs55
    @ffs55 Год назад

    Great video! Man, this would have changed my life 20 years ago -- I young people take heed.

  • @themightypen1530
    @themightypen1530 2 года назад +4

    Lex is the GOAT.

  • @jamieknapp
    @jamieknapp 2 года назад +1

    BIG PROPS on the charity water donation ❤❤

  • @RhettReisman
    @RhettReisman 2 года назад +3

    Where’s the podcast 😢

  • @YouilAushana
    @YouilAushana 2 года назад +1

    I have "personally" been through a lot compared to most. I accepted that most people are shallow, superficial and ignorant. Its lonely at times but peaceful most of the time.

  • @blazept567
    @blazept567 2 года назад +38

    Damn it... you're 9 hours too late... 😆
    I just had an argument with a neighbour who was being the worst person to talk to. Seemed like a robot.
    I didn't lose my composure, but I sure as hell could have made a better impression...
    Please keep posting these videos. You guys are awesome.

    • @kokolanza7543
      @kokolanza7543 Год назад +2

      Good for not losing your composure. Practice makes perfect.

  • @bnwessel
    @bnwessel 2 года назад +1

    I love this thank you, I strive to communicate like that

  • @TZeroZeroOne
    @TZeroZeroOne 2 года назад +11

    I enjoy this channel, and appreciate the effort in collecting the actual examples. I understand that your goal is to improve communications when the other side is not listening, changing the subject, committing logical fallacies or otherwise not playing fair. Nonetheless, I wish you would come up with videos with the same examples but for the purpose of alerting people that they may be employing such unhelpful tactics without realizing it. There is a need for referees.

  • @forsaken650
    @forsaken650 Год назад +1

    Great job explaining and pinpointing what is so great about Lex's conversational approach. That interview was fascinating to watch and tough to listen to. I felt Lex's pain when Ye said he didn't trust Lex, and I admired how he responded when he was able to collect his emotions with a heartfelt response. 😊

  • @WilliamJonesChess
    @WilliamJonesChess 2 года назад +16

    Key Moments
    Notes = big moments from the video. Square brackets are my own thoughts.
    1:20 Its tough, man. Its tough. I hear you. I hear you.
    2:26 Use a calm voice to explain yourself. Lex says 'With all due respect' then ends with 'I have to push back'
    [This is such a professional way to handle this argument. ]
    3:40 Lex got so angry when he said JM. Wow.
    4:07 [I wonder if Lex has said the following phrase before to disarm a situation: 'It is funny how this world works.'
    I wonder if this phrase is pre-planned for difficult conversations just as a way to take a step back. ]
    Fascinating phrase.
    4:33 Mr Bean: do not negatively label the whole person
    4:55 well put, I agree, I agree. Give out positive feedback to build rapport
    Do not keep positive thoughts to self, and negative thoughts out loud
    5:53 You are under a lot of attack. A lot of attack. [Nice to repeat a phrase back to a person to ensure they are being heard]
    You have a vision [ This is such a positive thing to say. It forces Kanye to like Lex]
    6:05 It is a wonderful life though. [Does Kanye mean this? It did not sound real]
    6:24 Be vulnerable when you feel a negative emotion
    'This is silly coz u don't know me. But it hurt when you said you don't trust me. You lost me.'
    [This was such an interesting moment in this video.
    Even I felt hurt when this happened.
    Maybe because this comment is attacking Lex's overall identity.
    Maybe Lex sees himself as a trusting person]
    7:10 Nice moment: Or I could be opening up conversations with new friends I may trust some day.
    9:18 A great man still through the pain does the right thing [ Hey, that rhymes!]
    These are my top moments from this video.
    How about you? What were your top moments?

  • @fayoztoshmirzaev7895
    @fayoztoshmirzaev7895 Год назад

    This is just great, I don't know what to say else but respect to Charisma on Command team

  • @keencole
    @keencole 2 года назад +9

    I hope more people discover, Lex after this. He’s a sincere lover of life and a friend to all people.

  • @GroundbreakGames
    @GroundbreakGames 2 года назад

    Being correct does not mean being persuasive. That is some stone cold truth right there. Great vid!

  • @AlismonitesPatrides
    @AlismonitesPatrides 2 года назад +3

    Wow. Lex is strong!

  • @DarkInception
    @DarkInception Год назад +2

    I can’t understate Lex’s conversational prowess.
    He responds with such empathy and precision.
    I’m taken aback every time I watch his conversation with Kanye.