Drinking CULTURE & AGE - USA vs. GERMANY 🇩🇪 AMERICANS will be SHOCKED by This!! 🇺🇸🍺😱
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- Опубликовано: 1 окт 2024
- In this video, we are talking about worldwide drinking consumption per capita, the percentage of alcoholism by country, and then drinking culture and age between the USA and Germany. It gets JUICY! And we discuss it all with the amazing @FelifromGermany ! Many of you probably already follow her, but she's a German who lives in the USA. She talks about what it was like growing up in Germany with a lower drinking age, and we talk about what it was like in the USA.
Make sure to go check out the interview that Feli did with us on her channel, all about parenting as Americans in Germany! / felifromgermany
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Alcoholism By Country - worldpopulatio...
Alcohol Consumption by Country - worldpopulatio...
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Hello, I am a Canadian raised by German parents. I was fortunate to be able to travel to Germany often as I was growing up, to visit my relatives. I always loved to compare our different cultures. One of the things that always impressed me, was the openness of alcohol and sex (nudity). As many other people posted, I was allowed to try and partake of some alcoholic beverages, mainly beer and wine, at a very early age (10, I believe?). By taking the mystery away from alcohol, I feel made more sense to respect drinking than being strict and prohibiting consumption, thereby making it the forbidden fruit! Making those first encounters with alcohol at home, like having wine with a special meal for celebration or festivities, under the supervision of my parents, taught me about the proper social aspects of drinking alcohol. So later when I was out with friends, I didn't feel the need to "drink to get drunk" because I had been taught a whole different set of values. My legal drinking age at the time, in Canada (province of Ontario, at least) was 18 years old. We even had just introduced Age of Majority cards to prove we were of legal drinking age when entering any bar or establishment serving liquor. A couple of years later, it was raised to 19 and unfortunately they also scrapped the cards. I did envy my German cousins having such an open culture. I also noticed their attitudes were more respectful of drinking than those I encountered among my peers at home. Our rules regarding where we are allowed to consume alcohol are also so much more restrictive. My husband was amazed to learn that you could walk down the street drinking a beer you just picked up at a kiosk or drink while driving in a car (as long as you are not driving!). Having alcoholic drinks available everywhere like grocery stores, kiosks, markets, parks, etc., was totally mind-blowing. It almost seems to me, the harder you try to control who, what and where of alcohol, the less control you have in the end. Keep it casual, as you would with anything else that you teach your kids and they'll learn the right way to handle it. I have done the same with my four children and none of them have any problems with drinking. This has been my experience and opinion. Thanks. Prost!
I so agree with that
You're allowed to drink when driving even. As long as you stay under 0.5 promille. But if police sees you probably get in trouble, cause they will stop you and let you take the blow test, and if you just took a sip the result will be over 0.5. Then they take you to a doctor, who takes a blood sample and the result will be below 0.5. So you won't get punished, but waste a lot of time.
follow canadian here we ranked 16th i thought we would be higher I think it comes down to how you are raised
I think the "safety of still living with your parents" thing is really important. I remember when I was 16 and tested my beer limits, when I got home drunk and had a headache the next morning, my father talked to me like "so, how do you feel? Is it fun? Now you know your limits, I hope." No "how do you dare get drunk", just "I trust that now you know getting THAT drunk is not fun, but it is important that you experienced it, now we can talk about it - here, have something to help with the headache, welcome to being an adult". I guess that in the US, when you're 21 and probably not living at home anymore, that lack of support by your parents is quite a disadvantage.
the trick is to send your kids lawnmowing the next morning.
I so agree! I then its one of the main goals of parenting. For our children to make mistakes and try out new things and then to be able to talk through them with us and learn from them with the safety and support of their parents.
@@nox5555 I love it but thats so sadistic. lol
@@nox5555 Haha, yep. My father usually found something to do for me in case I was hungover. "Wer saufen kann muß auch arbeiten können" was his motto. I learned my limits pretty fast.
What I learned from an exchange with English students in the 1980s. The English culture was not as open regarding sex education. After that exchange, we stayed in touch with some of the British students and over the course of that time we heard of many teenage pregnancies (not related to their visit in Germany 😅). However in my German school I only remember 1 girl who got pregnant.
Conclusion I learned: it is important to be open about everything and teach kids, teenagers about all aspects of life.
The same with my experience in Rhineland: There was only one girl at my school that I know from, who got pregnant before 20. And she had an abusivr father who she fled very early.
@@MartinAmbrosiusHackl and
Interesting video thanks. I am a Brit living in Munich and married to a German lady. We discussed about this video and are both of the opinion that there are other things that are possibly more significant to the higher alcoholism rate in the USA (i.e. more significant than different drinking ages). We think that the different social systems have a significant impact - the social system in Germany is so much better at taking care of the less well off people, eg they don't need to worry about paying for healthcare or about being unemployed as they know that the government will take care and support them to a degree, whereas its very different in the US as you guys have reported in various videos (also Feli), and its often people under these hardship conditions that are so much more stressed and may turn to alcohol. So we think that is probably more significant in explaining the higher alcoholism rates in the US. Just another opinion to throw into the mix! 🙂
I'm a counselor and I think the point you made is valid.
But living in Greece I can tell you that in Greece the social welfare system is not very different from the one in the US and if you need counseling or psychotherapy you have to pay for it yourself. Being mentally ill in Greece is harsh. Still Greece has a very low alcoholism rate even though alcohol is very easily available and not expensive. Scientists assume the reason for Greece's low alcoholism rate is linked to alcohol being introduced into people's lifes connected to social gatherings, religious events, family dinners and food. So it's not something forbidden you get only when you grow up, it's not something transgressive, which would make it interesting for teens to affirm their autonomy.
Interestingly addiction to gambling is a real problem in Greece.
yeah but no ... hardship does not come from income alone - this standpoint is pretty Mammon-centric, like when your well off your done with hardships in your life, therefore earning money is key.
my family was first mentioned in historic records 963 AD, and we are still on the upper side of wealth a thousand and sixty years later and from the six kids my grandparents on the paternal side had 4 are functioning alcoholics. luckily not my side of the lineage, but sadly 2 of my uncles and 2 of my aunts.
wealth does not make you lucky
but I see that the combination of poverty and not being educated well may play a big role in alcoholism
I think the main difference for minors drinking, that in Germany this is seen as a parental problem, not as a legal one.
Ooo that’s an important difference.
Oooh, yes! Same here in Norway. If the police were to catch you drunk, they drive you home or makes sure you're safe and let the parents know. If it's consistent, maybe child protective services or the school would be notified. No legal trouble.
@@MyMerryMessyGermanLife - Agree. In Belgium, if a kid is drunk, authorities will contact the parents. As long as you’re a minor, in the majority of infractions, parents are legally responsible and held accountable. If problems repeat themselves and/or add up, the authorities will take on both the parents and the child(ren).
My daughter is 18 and I see two main attitudes towards drinking. One is “don’t make it a taboo, teach them it’s part of life but to handle things responsibly” and the other is “no alcohol until the age of 16/18 (depending on the parents). Over the years I’ve seen A LOT of excesses as soon as the kid hits the age parents will allow alcohol. Kids who grew up knowing about alcohol, how to not go past a certain point, will tend to go past their limits a lot less.
There is also the concept of having to have alcohol in order to he able to have fun. It’s much less of a thing in Belgium than in other countries I’ve lived and cultures I’ve been exposed to. Drinking isn’t frowned on. Being drunk is.
Until not so long ago, drinking age across the board was 16. Now it’s like in Germany: at 16 you can have unfortified/undistilled alcoholic drinks. From 18 years onwards, all alcoholic drinks are legal. There is no regulation that I know of regarding alcohol consumption inside the home.
I’m not saying kids in Belgium won’t think alcohol/getting drunk is a necessary ingredient to letting their hair down, having fun, etc. There definitely is a contingent that does. Lots of youths however will simply enjoy a few drinks and leave it at that. Or get slightly drunk and secure a ride before even starting. Perhaps that’s also because in Belgium, you can get fined for being intoxicated in public places even when you’re not driving a car. Even pedestrians can get fined. People serving alcohol, whether it’s in a professional setting or a private one, can get into serious trouble if they don’t cut off someone who is intoxicated and you keep serving them. If the intoxicated person gets into an accident that involves loss of life or injury, the person serving the alcohol can even face a prison sentence. It’s rare but it happens.
Specifically my daughter: she started sampling sips from my glass from the age of around 12, sporadically (I’m not a big or frequent drinker). That graduated towards the occasional half glass with dinner at family get togethers or as an apéritif before those dinners. At 16, she was almost always offered (but NEVER pushed to!) wine, beer, cider or mead (I’m a home brewer) when others at a gathering were having some. Granted, there weren’t many gatherings because of the pandemic, but still. She was, simply put, treated as one of the group albeit that all (older) adults were aware of her being at the very beginning of legal drinking age and there’d always be someone mentioning that it was just an offer and that there was a wide selection of non-alcoholic beverages available. Occasionally I’d gently tell her she was responsible for her own intake. I think that is a very important point: making your child aware of their responsibility and the consequences of their own actions. “No compassion if you get a hangover or make a fool of yourself” is a big element.
The result of this approach, given my daughter’s personality and overall education, is that she does enjoy alcoholic drinks, doesn’t like the feeling of loss of self-control even light intoxication gives her, doesn’t enjoy seeing her friends get very drunk, and sticks to 1-2 drinks, preferably with a meal, over the course of an entire evening. She’ll alternate between alcohol and other drinks over an event (if for example a get together starts at 11am and lasts well into the night) and remains in full control of herself at all times. Best summed up her philosophy towards alcohol consumption is “alcohol for the flavour of the drink itself, other drinks for thirst”.
I know from friends who were at events my daughter was at (reported by elder siblings of friends’ kids etc) that she doesn’t succumb to peer pressure either. If she feels she needs to, she’ll call me or another trusted adult to come pick her up wherever she is. That’s very reassuring and I’ll never penalise her for doing so. On the contrary: I’ll reward her for it.
@@MyMerryMessyGermanLife the most important aspect about having no legal problems: if a bunch of 14/15 year old are drinking and it does get out of hand and someone actually requires help, no one will hesitate to call an ambulance or police. I could imagine that's different in the US, where even 20 year olds would have to consider the legal repercussions of calling 911, not only for the person needing help but for everyone else involved in the underaged drinking occasion
I recall in Germany one could buy legally a beer at age 16, but high-percentage liquor only from 18. They sold this even at filling stations, which I don't think is too great an idea.
I'm a recovered alcoholic. My family started pushing alcohol onto me from the age of 13ish. I was that weird anxious kid that never fit in and never understood or liked other people. When we had big family gatherings my aunts and uncles would give me sweet hard liquor to loosen up and be more fun to be around. My father drinks on a daily base and he treated it as a common interest that connects us. In 12+13th grade I was constantly hungover or still drunk. It got better when I left school and started my Ausbildung, but after that it spiraled out of control. I was still depressed and had anxiety (still have, officially diagnosed know) and the only way to cope with that was to drink.
How can you prevent your children from turning into me me?
Take them seriously. If they are depressed, scared, anxious, acknowledge these feelings and don't tell them there's nothing do be scared of.
Don't push them to drink. You wouldn't try to make them smoke either.
Keep an eye on when and why they drink. With friends by the lake enjoying the summer or alone at home in their bedroom.
It all sums up to treating you child as a real person and accepting them the way they are and to help them with their struggles in life.
I'm glad you recovered. 👍
It's horrible what you went through, by your own family. :( Who treats a child like that? Some people don't deserve children, but you deserved so much better. You should be so proud of yourself that you still managed to recover, I am proud of you too!!!
@dude988....
from your history I ask whether your family members who were pushing alcohol on you also had alcohol pushed on them as minors.....if it is a generational issue, I have concerns. Do you have children? If so, I hope you are not doing to them what your family did to you.
I remember traveling with my grandparents and cousin to Menorca/Spain when I was 14 and both kids saw the bar and went "woah! so many colourful drinks! We want to try them!" and our grandma actually bought every drink we wanted to try. She was of the opinion that we should test things out and understand our limits when the adults could actually see us and intervene instead of doing it in secret somewhere and unsupervised. You can't really stop it if the kid is hellbent on drinking alcohol, she said. It was fine until I got the great idea to try vodka-cola right before our flight home. I was a very drunk kid and don't really remember our flight back - or the 4 hours of waiting at the airport. My mother was so livid 😂 But all in all they all agreed that if they allow us to try stuff, we'll know our limits when we can legally buy the stuff and drink unsupervised.
What a good story to share! So did having that experience indeed help you to learn your limits?
Her the same , or close to that . My father wanted to keep us from drinking and smoking . It helped to know the limits .😅
@@MyMerryMessyGermanLife Yes, I think so. I remember only one occasion where I failed to stop drinking before I got wasted. And that is when I drank a type of alcohol I never tried before. Usually, I know the signs of "drink more and you will have a hangover" etc. pretty well. I don't endorse drinking alcohol, but if you do, you should know how to do it responsibly and know your limits. That way everyone can enjoy a nice evening :)
Great video - been waiting for this topic for a while. When I was 22 my parents and five of my aunts and uncles took me with them to an island where one of my uncles had a second vacation home. My 24 year old brother was supposed to come with me on this trip but he chickened out and left me hanging. The eight of us were all drinking on this trip, but seems like I was the one who stayed the most sober. It was rather funny watching the older generation get lit up.
A few years down the road I started drinking alcoholically and eventually recovered. One day about a week before Christmas I woke up and I just knew that no matter what else happened, I didn't want to drink. I didn't make the decision; the decision made me. I'm very lucky I didn't kill someone while driving drunk.
Different cultures have different laws and norms that make them more or less susceptible to alcoholism (or high blood pressure, high cholesterol, high blood sugar, etc). But someone having or not having one of these problems is another issue.
Now, one thing that european parents don't do is making minors binge drink at a bar in order to learn their limits! No wonder your laws are so strict!
I wonder if the low drinking age in germany is one of the reason why the alcoholism rate is low.
after all I know a lot of people in their mid 20s who are already out of their high alcohol consumtion "phase", while people in the US basically just started and at that age you can afford becoming an alcoholic and dont focus your consumtion on parties like many german young people do
there probably are a lot of factors (like not being close to the polar circle, less pressure on people in general, medical care etc) but i would imagine that that low drinking age and the parental guidance that comes with it would contribute to more responsible use - the limited financial resources of coure help as well... its a bit of a naturally moderating factor^^
I' m an older native German and my son is now in his mid twentees so I could share my owen experiences from way back in the 1960tees and the ones of my son right after the new Millenium have started.
From my point of view Felie naild the point with her remark about the different kind of relationship between Teenagers in Europe towards their parents (more of an counselor kind than about hirachy) and the often times more hirachy Kind of relationship in the US.
Kids regardles of the society they are born through will watch their parents more than we are aware of and they will quickly spot our double standards (telling the one Thing but doing it another way) and with this in mind you will have a hard time to demand one way and behaving the other.
As with other human things we have to be honest with oureself and espacialy with our teanage kids.
Great points. Yes kids are so good at pointing out our double standards, and good for them! They help us to become better people IF we listen and choose to be humble.
Belgian here. A quick search tells me we have the same rules as Germany when it come to public consumption and purchase. For consumption at home, there is no law.
My first experience with alcohol was at the age of 11. We were on a school trip and where we stayed, with the meal, they served some brown craft beer (
Italian here, and I totaly associate with what you wrote.
Me havent havent worked with addicts for 20years and being a dane (we drink a lot), im pretty sure that alcoholism (while it can be genetics) is mostly due to stress, lack of social networks/friends and a lack of psychiatric care.
A lot of alcoholics have a variety of diagnoses like depression, scizophrenia etc etc. Its always hard to find the single cause and if one thing led to the other or vice versa.
I grew up in the 90s, like Feli in a big Bavarian City, but my experience was a bit different. My friends didn‘t start drinking until 16, and though there were some excesses, nobody ever had to go to the Hospital or something. I actually liked neither the taste nor the effect, so I was designated driver from day one and, now in my fourties, have never started drinking any alcohol. But I still thought my German friends had more fun and dignity left than for example the English Teens I met. Being clumsy drunk at a Party at 16 is one thing… but being a University Student at 19 (UK) or 21 (US) and going to the Woods to just drink uncontrollably somehow always felt more pathetic to me.
I grew up in Germany. My parents were doctors. Alcohol was part of our every day life. When I was 7 I got watered down red wine. I certainly got offered any alcohol by the time I was 14. I never got drunk, didn’t feel the need, even during parties. My children grew up in New Zealand and I did the same thing my parents did with me. My three children are all sensible consumers of alcohol; NZ has a terrible drinking culture and rate of alcoholism, especially in the South of the countries. I just wouldn’t make a big deal of alcohol and show them normalised drinking.
I grew up with the alcohol culture in Germany and in retrospektive my parents strategy with alcohol was relaxed and successful as I learned to drink responsibly I have never been really drunk in my life. It was normal to see my parents and grandparents drink growing up. A beer for dinner or a glass of wine was a relatively regular occurrence and especially at family gatherings so it was never a taboo. I got my first glass of alcohol on new years eve at age 11 from my grandpa a glass of champagne. I didn't like the taste and after that it was only at a wedding or something similar I was allowed to have one glass for a toast always with my parents there. At 13 I was allowed to have a radler at dinner at family gatherings. At 14 I got my first alcohol in public also at family gatherings with my parents there. After 14 I drank more regularly but my parents always told me eat something first and you never drink on your own. When I say more regularly it is 1 radler at dinner on a Saturday evening. At 16 it got even more relaxed especially regarding gatherings with friends it was normal to drink beer or wine at a birthday party but I never had the desire to get drunk. I think it is because alcohol wasn't this new thing that I was allowed to do I had had it and getting drunk just for the purpose of getting drunk seemed useless to me. Why would I make myself miserable the next day. My parents alway knew when I went to a party they always stayed up till I got home and I had no secrets from them regarding drinking or smoking. When we went to a public festival or club they always offered to pick us up afterwards. 12 was my curfew but if I talked to them beforehand I could stay later. They'd even pick me up at 2am. I didn't have to sneak out once because I knew my parents would allow me to go. If it was legal I could do it regarding drinking and curfew. Hard liquor started to become more of a topic after 16 but it was one shot or two and I learned my limits. At 18 I had tried all things regarding alcohol so the only new thing was that I could by it and that had never been a challenge before because if I asked and gave a reason my parents would buy it for me even before 18. Another thing was that I got my drivers license at 18 with that came more freedom because our parents didn't have to pick us up anymore. If we went out with friends we always decided on a designated driver beforehand. At 18 you aren't allowed to have any alcohol in your blood when driving and we stayed with that rule. If you are 21 and had your drivers license for more than two years you are allowed to have 0.5 per mille blood alcohol level but once I got to that age I didn't use it very much.
My parents had rules regarding alcohol:
- If it's legal you can do it
- Eat before and during drinking
- You can get really drunk once and afterwards you should know your limit
- If you get drunk there is no pity and you still are required to do your chores and appear at meals.
- You can always tell us anything
My advice for you would be establish an alcohol consumption culture with your kids where it isn't a strict taboo. Make it a topic in your everyday life when shopping let them put it in the cart and look at the price when in a restaurant with the kids order alcohol to let them see that it is normal. Make it possible for them to tell you when they are going to drink something. It is better you know when they do it. Otherwise they'll do it behind your back. And don't forbid it rather let them try to have alcohol regularly when you are with them so once they are allowed to do it on their own they are already familiar with it and somewhat know their limit.
Collaborations are always so refreshing, to see new creators and watching their view.
I want to see more of this content to be honest.
Oh good to know you like them! They always seem to get fewer views on many other channels so I was nervous to do one.
@@MyMerryMessyGermanLife Oh don't be! This was really fun! :D
@@MyMerryMessyGermanLife you is doing a great job. go on and don´t stop.
btw, it isn´t a job! it is your live! make it!
I think it can be considered a general rule, that if you think that you have to be ashamed to talk about a topic with your parents, then there’s something not right.
I grew up in the US to Italian parents. I had a splash of red wine in ginger ale since…..I can remember. Also at every family party/event, I could have a small glass of pro secco if wanted. I usually didn’t.
Same with a kid’s coffee. Warm milk with a tiny splash of espresso.
I now have a 17 and 16 year olds in Germany. My German husband and I treat them the same way. They can have beer/wine with dinner since forever. They usually choose something else.
My kids have been to their fair share of parties. There are kids who have a beer and kids who finish their third before some finish their first.
My 17 year old will be 18 next month and friends have already asked him to buy hard stuff. He laughed and said no! Both my boys have Feli’s mentality, a beer to be social or with a meal but those who over due it are considered obnoxious.
I asked if he wanted a huge party for his 18th. He said no because the drunks would ruin the mood. Instead he wants a small dinner party with only 6-8 friends even though one of his friends shared the same birthday and they considered throwing a huge bash together. We pick up our kids too at all hours if the party is far. Often it is just in our neighborhood.
I remember, when my daughter went on a school trip to Provence….
Most of them were 18 and even the teachers at her gymnasium were laid back enough to let them drink in moderation.
They considered wine a part of experiencing the culture and just expected them to be able to take part in the sightseeing without being too wasted😂
My daughter went on a school trip to Tuscany back then and the one who got drunk the most every day was the teacher. She found that pretty disgusting.
Wow! This would be a shock for Americans! This would never be done. This aspect of our country’s cultures truly is very very different!
@@grandmak. that would be weird to see your teacher drunk.
A good attitude I think. That is the best way. :D
@@MyMerryMessyGermanLife absolutely !
I was the son of a Canadian Army member who was posted to northern Germany(Westphalia) at age 16. Drinking laws at that time were pretty open and drinking in gasthofs was normal. An interesting aspect was that new kids drank excessively initially but over time, when it was no longer novel, they drew back and drinking was normalized and no longer drank and got drunk. As military and dependants we we issued ration cards which allowed taboo and beer at age 16 and hard liquor at age 18, much more mature approach than in Canada.
I'm a Canadian. I grew up about 1 hour away from Toronto. My parents were both immigrants from Germany and Austria. I found that compared to my friends, I thought of drinking as a much less rebellious thing, and just a normal thing to do when you got older. I also found that because I was able to be more open about it compared to my friends, I was able to manage the situation a bit better. If I knew I wanted to drink a lot I would plan for that and have safety protocols in place. Most of the time though, drinking in moderation was the way to go. I really made sure that it was my comfort level that informed my decisions in terms of drinking. I did find that some of my friends lost control more easily sometimes when they were experimenting with it. Where I didn't feel the need to experiment as much, because it was an open thing in my household. I did find that my friends and I made sure to take care of each other, similar to Feli. The drinking age in Ontario is 19, but younger teens get alcohol pretty easily from older siblings, stealing from parents etc. A lot of Euro immigrant families like mine allowed moderate drinking. (I could have radlers, for example)
I am a native German women in my fifties and my parents handled it (already) like Felis. My first drink was a small glass of white wine at a family gathering - so I was under surveillance. From that time on drinking only on festive occasions. I'm sure you know that having a glass of Sekt has a huge standing here in Germany. My husband grew up with the same introduction to alcohol. As we did it with our daughter, too.
I think a few factors of alcoholism are: upbringing, state of mind and intent. :) In my family, for example, it is just the common, polite thing to drink beer and hard liquor for family gatherings. I was never a big fan because I didn't like the taste, but I was almost made fun of it for it. I never liked doing something just because everyone else was doing it, so naturally I never had a problem with alcoholism myself, although I have been drunk a handful of times in my life of course. Most often though I always liked the role of getting everyone home safely at the end of a party with friends, so everything worked out fine in those earlier wild, party days. (Especially since I had friends who were coincidentally not drinking for the sake of getting drunk either, which some are). The few cases of alcoholism I know personally (all of them way past 50y old, so grown adults) are, or were, really all a form of depression or loneliness (which I think is why a few of the former soviet states are on the list). If life in general is not treating you good right now, you are much more likely to succumb to alcoholism I think. Plus peer pressure. Which is still a big deal, but luckily it seems to mostly remain a teenager phase in Germany.
Seams like in those cases you discribe the alcoholism is more a symptom than the main part of the Illness.
@@MusikCassette Yep I did. There are many forms of "constant drunks" but I didn't think I had to go in depth with that.
I agree, I always had the impression that one of the main driving forces for alcoholism was self-medication by people struggling with mental health problems who are turning to alcohol in an attempt to mitigate those problems.
I grew up in Milwaukee, WI when the drinking age was 18. To me going out was more about socializing, seeing bands and listening to music than it was about drinking. We had so much fun in college going to clubs, dancing, and being with loads of other young people. Our university had an area with a vibrant night life and everyone would walk so there was no issue with drinking and driving. I couldn’t imagine what we’d have done at that age without that experience, I actually feel sorry for young people being shut out of the adult world and all the fun.
I think the responsibility point is quite important in Germany regarding the early drinking age and culture. As Feli mentioned, we were always told to look out for each other, be responsible, my male friends walked/had to walk us girls home when we were not picked up and to this day, at 33 years, I always love it when I live in Germany and friends (even new friends) end the night “send me a message when you’re home safe” and you nearly always get a response to that with “good night” or something as acknowledgement that everyone is home safe but stayed up until they knew this is the case. Sometimes experience that in the USA, AUS or the UK but not very often. BTW: I still call my parents “mum” and “dad” 😊 and yes, teachers asked us also if they want us to use the “Sie” in school or stick to “Du”
I was on the later blooming side, as well. These days, the rules and controls for bars and restaurants are somewhat stricter than 20 to 30 years ago when I was that age. However, I think it is pretty much true that learning to handle alcohol with the help of your parents is a lot better than having to find out completely on your own!
8:52 Can anyone confirm that Uganda is a European country? 😉
Das liegt an der Blaerbock, Sie hat doch in irgend eine Rede gesagt, dass Sie Außenministerin von Afrika ist. Ironie off
French perspective:
My dad (born in '64), is French, and his grandmother gave him
small amounts of wine when he was an infant.
She would pour him the bottom of the glass, like a sirup, add one or two cubes of sugar,
and stirr it into water. And she gave that to the kids.
And the wines was just for the taste. So yeah that must have been around 1970,
it's been a while, I don't think it's common practice now,
but it used to be from what I know ^^
Hi - German here. I think the main point is what alcohol is taken to mean in a certain culture. If it's put on a pedestal, meaning only adults are allowed to have it, of course all the kids want it to 'prove' they are grown-ups. I remember my parents always gave me wine with our Sunday meal in order to teach me to differentiate between good and bad stuff - at the age of ten. The same went with having small sips of Cognac - and in this respect I'd have to disagree with Feli here - I liked the taste back then, it's not true that children only like sweet stuff or something. So for me, drinking alcohol had nothing to do with maturity, but with culture, aesthetics and sophistication. Getting drunk would counteract all this (you can't really taste anything when you're too drunk to realize anything to say nothing of the disgusting aftermath...) so to this day (I'm now 58) I enjoy different kinds of alcoholic drinks but never have been drunk (little tipsy yes, but not drunk) in my life.
This is fascinating! These stories we just don’t hear in the US. This is one aspect of European and American cultures that are just vastly different. Europeans really do approach alcohol more like an art and that somehow got lost in the US to a certain extent.
@@MyMerryMessyGermanLife This is an interesting question. As an outsider, I can only speculate, but do you think it possible it might be connected to the Calvinistic attitued towards anything of sensual pleasure?
My experiance with about 10 American GIs stationed in Ansbach/Germany and some locals: Right after duty the GIs started drinking beer as fast as possible to get as drunk as possible. Tipsy time were fun but then it went delirious with fighting and falling down the stairs, while the drunken Germans (me included) still knew what they said and did.
I think repressive alcohol regulations lead to a more unreasonable behaving.
What a great video ! Well, you asked your followers for their experience so here we go. When I was a teenager ( which was about 55 years ago 🤭) my parents encouraged me to have a glass of wine or beer with them so I would learn the effect of alcohol within my home rather than outside. I hated the taste of alcohol back then but when I started to enjoy it at about 18 or 19 I was prepared to not drink too much. I do remember though coming home one night and locking myself into the bathroom to throw up because I had drunk too much. My father heard that, got out of bed, stood outside the bathroom door and asked " so you drank too much ? Are you ok?" and my mother woke me up the next morning before school with an Alka Seltzer.
When my daughter was a teenager in her rebellious years we would fight about her going to clubs at late hours far before the legal age but never about her drinking because having watched her peers lose their self control she always knew her limit ( similar to what Feli said).
I do agree that the ideal relationship between parents and kids is being able to talk things like that through and establishing a fearless atmosphere but on the other hand I don't think parents must be their kids best buddies. That's why I prefer the cuddly 'mom' and 'dad' as opposed to calling your parents by their first names.
Let's be honest : parents remain the ones to bear responsibility and make decisions as long as the kids are under age so that there will always be at least a minimum of hierarchy between them. And I love it when my 46 year old daughter still calls me 'Mami'🥰.
My 16th birthday is on Wednesday. But i never was drunk and don't plan to get drunk with my friends. My class in school is very responsible i think, so there is no alcohol drinking. We did drink a LOT of alcohol free beer. I really like the taste of beer, but i don't like the taste of alcohol. I do however like wine which i had some sips of. I might drink like 0.1L on my birthday.
Different topic: the Sie in tenth grade is definitely true. We most often get siezed now. Great video, i always like your videos!
Disclaimer: I am in my sixties now, so I am a couple of generations ahead of you and Feli.
When I grew up parents would sometimes allow you a sip of their wine or beer, if you wanted to taste it. They would NOT serve you drinks, or even at a regular basis. So I have a slight problem with the definition of "drinking". I don't consider sipping on my mother's or father's wineglass as "drinking", or even drinking regularly. To me it's like this: they would allow us to taste it under their supervision, so we don't have to go out and try to get alcohol from someone/somewhere. The appeal of drinking was definitely low, as you didn't get the feeling from your parents like you are doing something "special" or forbidden. So even when I was 16, going dancing etc. barely any of us would drink alcohol/beer when we were out, we usually opted for a coca cola (as this was usually something our parents would not have at home, except for birthdays or similar - sugary drinks). I have never been drunk in my whole life, I have been "tipsy" maybe 3 times in my life (in my thirties and once last year: I had two cocktails) but mainly because I barely drink alcohol, so I get tipsy very easily. I usually have a glass of Prosecco for my birthday and christmas and New Years. It is very rare that I have anything else over the rest of the year. I don't drink beer ever, I don't like it, and I only know that because I tasted it when I was a teenager, my father let me have a sip. As for wine I like it better, but for some reason I don't really drink wine. A bottle is just too large and it would get wasted being open and I have only a glass and then for weeks nothing, so I don't even buy it. And even with Prosecco/Sekt/Champagner I buy a "piccolo" (small bottle with 0,2l) because I would not finish a regular bottle. Same thing goes for my sister, she doesn't drink either.
I believe that because we grew up without this "huge thing" over our heads, there was no "forbidden fruit" and we tried it, didn't really like it, there was also never any peer pressure, because you were allowed to drink so it really was your choice if you did or didn't, that was probably the reason why we didn't grow up to be "big" on alcohol. BUT: I did hide a sugary drink every once in a while in my closet from my parents 😉😂
I don't remember any of my friends ever being drunk or over-indulging on alcohol.
Another experience I had, was when I lived in the US, first at college and later working. I realized that, to my shock, most of the college kids were drinking excessively, they also had sex often with changing partners, which was absolutely shocking to me. I shared my room with another German, a French and a girl from Boston. all four of us were not big on drinking, funny coincidence and we didn't have boyfriends at the time, so we basically were together all the time. There were also some Dutch and Danish guys at the school (sports scholarship) and they were drinking quite a lot, so I don't think being European had anything to do with the drinking or not, but it was more the guys who drank a lot, than the girls. A few though did. When I was working it was quite common to go for drinks after work, happy hour, and while I mostly only had soft drinks (coke , ginger ale, cranberry juice), I occasionally had a frozen strawberry daiquiri, but I saw that many of my co-workers would have "hard drinks" and not just one. So I realized that drinking seems to be also a cultural thing when socialising, which I had not experienced working in Germany.
When I lived in Italy it was quite normal for everybody to have a small glass of red wine with their meal, but I did not see them heavily drinking. In my first time, when I was still at a language school I was with people from many countries and when we went out in the evening it became apparent that people from certain countries were drinking more than others.
The Germans, French, Spanish, Swedes, Canadians and the Brazilians didn't drink a lot, while the Russians, Polish, British, Americans and Australians did drink substantially more, to the point they were intoxicated. Age-wise we were a quite well mixed group from people in their twenties to an American guy in his 70's. I was in my 40's. Working in Italy it was quite common to go for an aperitivo after work, but I rarely saw my co-workers overdue it. So in the italian culture it was definitely a social thing to go out for drinks, but not for "drinking" yourself into oblivion.
I found it quite interesting to be able to live in different cultures and experiencing different things.
Regarding alcohol it is my firm belief that the less alcohol is stigmatised the less likely you are to become a heavy drinker or alcoholic. HOWEVER, I think it is also important to take into consideration that some people might be genetically prone to addiction, in these cases I don't think culture and the legal age for alcohol can have any big influence.
One other thing I realized, Germans - the ones in my social environment - don't drive when they had a glass of beer or wine, while in the States I saw a lot of people saying: it was just the one glass .. or: I had only two beers ...
It seems that in Germany people plan ahead, like: I know I will have a drink, so I am going to use public transportation or take a cab .. while in the US it seemed to be more of a "spur of the moment" thing, like: I wasn't planning on drinking, but everybody did, so I did too, now I have to drive my car anyway.
I realize of course that it is way easier in Germany to take public transportation, so this might be a factor.
One other thing is the generational gap: In the past years I think drinking in teenagers has become more of a problem, I remember almost daily reading or hearing things about the misuse of alcohol in teenagers, and it was quite a shock. I think it was around 2007-ish and it was called "Komasaufen" (binge drinking) It seems to have gotten better though, I don't hear/read much about it any more, as far as I can tell this kind of misuse has become very uncool for the new generations. Good on them!
Personally I don't know anyone who was ever that drunk that they ended up in hospital or became alcoholics. But as I said, I am an older generation (baby boomers) and things were probably different. So I can't say that I ever experienced anything like what Feli experienced, people having to go to a hospital or parents sanctioning a party with alcohol or you drinking. However, my parents would always give me the feeling that they trust me and also that if ever something happened I could call them, have them get me from wherever I was and not have to hide anything. But they were definitely not as chill and cool as Feli's parents apparently were/are. But I didn't grow up in Bavaria, so maybe there is also a regional and not only a generational difference. And we never had any school festivals with parents and/or alcohol present. Not sure if that is due to the generational gap or a regional thing.
Sorry for the long comment. But I find your videos always very engaging, so I tend to write more.
Hab’s komplett gelesen. So at least you impressed a single person like me, myself & I :o)
I've just been reading it all too, and I am impressed as well as glad about the opportunity to learn about your many different experiences in different countries, so many habits and angles of view with regard to this subject, and such astute observations. So it was fun and very interesting to read it, (thank you!) and besides + moreover - I was sooo glad to note that there's somebody out there who writes even longer comments than I normally do 😂
My drinking experience in Saxony, Germany is a bit different from Bavarian experiences, where drinking culture is much more common. within a family, it is normally normal to being allowed to take a nip of wine or beer at age of 12. But as beer is usually very bitter and wine tastes very tannin-dry, kids naturally don't like it and come at it later when they're in company of others and realize that being dizzy is an interesting feeling. The problem is that schools doesn't talk enough about alcohol or problems that come with it. It should be part of familly education but in most families it is not. I think it is important that, as alcohol is availablle everywhere in Germany, to not make alcohol a forbidden thing, because this makes it more attractive in kids eyes. And this is the key why a high overall alcohol consumption doesn't leads to alcoholism.
We in Austria did not really have a practical age limit. It all depended on the parents, grand parents and where they went drinking. In my case i got beer even before kindergarten. I guess to „calm“ me down. Not much, mostly only a sniff or the foam, but i never knew about age limits till i was 20 something. I do not drink any alcohol since 2005, when my father - as at least 3 of his forefathers - died from liver cirrhosis induced by too much alcohol. 🤷♂️
good point there 👍
Yeah it’s so important to educate kids on the dangers of it and set healthy limits.
@@MyMerryMessyGermanLife Don't "protect" kids from real life. It just bites you in the Allerwertesten when they find out what they've missed.
It's not brought up in school? In NRW you visit DROBS in 8th grade with your whole class. That was already the case for me in the 90s and it's still mandatory today.
Austrian drinking culture is almost identical to the German one so I relate to everything Feli said. I think another point is that the novelty of drinking wears off fairly quickly for most people, so if you start at 15, by 21 you're likely to have a pretty normal relationship with alcohol and partying and not overdo it as much anymore. At least that's how it was for me. For example my parents would always offer me the dregs from a glass of wine as a kid (of course I found the taste disgusting back then). Especially the way my parents always put the focus on quality over quantity later prevented me from going overboard - as a person who generally appreciates taste, my parents effectively managed to keep me from drinking shitty 5€ vodka or cardboard box wine by showing me what good wine and liquor tastes like. I started drinking at 14, but then I went to the US for a year in 10th grade so I didn't party until I got back at 16. I had some bad hangovers including blacking out pretty badly once but I think these experiences taught me that drinking to that point is terrible and I didn't want to do it anymore. By the time I hit the legal drinking age in the US, I already very much felt like I was getting too old for drinking in that way. I would drink socially with my friends (maybe 2-4 drinks a night) but not to the point of being wasted. When the pandemic hit in 2020, obviously we didn't have many parties for over two years and now that I'm 25, I honestly feel like I'm too old for that shit - my hangovers are starting to be terrible and while I still appreciate a good glass of wine or a beer or two when I'm hanging out with friends, the cost of getting drunk is just too high now. I appreciate the clarity of not being hungover on a Saturday or Sunday morning and being able to do fun stuff like going for brunch, to an exercise class or hiking.
Another interesting point is maybe driving under the influence. In Austria, there is a kind of driver's license you can get at 17. A lot of people take advantage of that especially if they live in the countryside. Generally, driving under the influence is unfortunately something of an Austrian national sport with people generally making light of it. I think it is probably much the same in Germany. In my friend group, this was never a huge problem as my as well as my friends' parents always picked me (and a few of my friends) up no matter the hour, but this might be something you want to have on your radar, especially as you don't live in a big city where you can easily go home on public transport or get a comparatively cheap taxi. I think here it's getting somewhat better in the younger generation as you're not allowed to drive drunk until you're 20 (as opposed to the 0,5 limit afterwards), which is why when some of my friends got their licenses, we would generally have a designated driver who did not drink at all for fear of getting their newly-earned license taken away. I'm not too sure how all of this works in Germany but I just wanted to let you know that getting home is usually the main problem, so if you solve it for your kids they will be eternally grateful (and also not die in an accident...).
My parents in Austria gave me beer since before kindergarten. I guess to „calm“ me down. But i never had the need to drink myself into stupor. It happened, a few times because of the group but not because of any „need“. And since 2005 i do not touch any alcohol and don‘t miss it. There is only one drawback. I can not become mayor without being drinkfest. Oh well. I will survive. 😊
Great video and actually a very important one. I grew up in Germany and my Grandma gave me watered down wine when I was 7-8 years old. However, the important thing is in the US you have the problem that you cannot go to a club or bar before you are 21 years old. This is actually very wrong as I think it creates a strange environment for the teenagers were they have to try things somewhere else and they will kind of loose a lot of their youth. When I see my Grandkids in the US as well as friends and they have no real thing to do as a 18-19 year old, I think it hinders their education, their self awareness and find out what is wrong and right. If you have to do that in the dark or start at 21, it is already to late to learn because many might already get married and have jobs but never had a cool teenage life to grow up and learn.
Going back to me growing up, I actually did NOT drink alcohol but still went to clubs or bars and hang out and enjoyed. The whole being 21 years old in the US just to go in an establishment like this is just ancient and in Germany it is way more relaxed. I would just be there for your kids and let them try and it will help them growing up and understand as they will become way more independent.
Loved reading about your experiences, thank you for sharing.
And concerning experiences: When visiting the Gymnasium, I was more the loner and outsider. Interested in books and outdoors, classical music. So I was not part of those in groups which met on weekends to bragg on Mondays who drank most and vomitted hardest. I just found it stupid and disgusting. The law changed and made it harder to legally buy alcohol. I personally offered my son a sip of fine red wine and alc free Radler and Bier and also let him try some with alcohol and told him, he can get it at home, so never needs to do it in secret. So, it was not interesting any longer. He will be 19 in December, never got drunk, is not really interested in alcohol, seldom a Radler in summer and doesn't smoke, nor drugs of course, since I taught him how to deal with tough life situations and how to overcome them and keep on track. We may enjoy a Federweißer or Federweißer soon, because the young, new and sweet wine is delicious. But never overdoing it. I also taught him to really enjoy and not to simply consume brainless and thoughtless. I am especially proud of him that he is mature enough and with enough self-esteem to say no even under "group pressure" as he experienced recently. Going instead back to his room and enjoying a good book. So, like mother like son. Independent, strong minded and we know what we want and do not want. Just: he is most definitely the better version of myself. I was and am more rebellious and emotional 😇
I get being proud of your kid, but indicating people only get addicted to drugs because their parents didn’t teach them how to cope with problems is incredibly uneducated, rude and naive.
Feli's LPS ("LIKE" per second) rate is out of control 😂e.g. @ 13:10 - 13:30
I remember 14 + allowance (at home or with your parents) was related to confirmation. After that you are considered an adult by the church and are allowed to drink alcohol accordingly.
Yes, as a teacher I often overheard conversations the day after confirmation Sundays about how drunk the confirmants had got and who had thrown up in somebody else's front yard. Schools even allowed them to skip the first two lessons on those Mondays.
Ohhhh! Is that how it started?! That makes so much sense now.
@@grandmak. oh my!
This is a protestant thing i guess.
@@tnit7554 yes I‘m evangelical.
Die Konfirmation bekommt man mit 14. Bei den Katholiken ist die Firmung ebenfalls mit 14.
Ich weiß nicht, wie es in der katholischen Kirche gehandhabt wird. Und da Deutschland zu größeren Teilen evangelisch is, hat sich das wahrscheinlich verallgemeinert.
Wenn man in der evangelischen Kirche zum Abendmahl gehen darf, gilt man als erwachsen.
I always called my grandparents and parents by their first name. My father used to tell a story from a train ride with my grandma where I was age 5. There a lady asked why I call my grandma by first name and not Oma. My answer was - she is not calling me grandchild either … :-)
I personally also think that the leveling of what you can trink in Germany is quite good. If it's already legal to trink this low percentage alcohol with sixteen you also trink this for the most part. Of course most people trink shots or mixed trinks on home parties, but you will not excessively start trinking wodka because you are able too. And I think this helps finding your personal boundaries, because you have to trink way more to go past your boundaries and it's easier to stop yourself if you want to.
In the region where I live, on the countryside in northern Germany, almost every parents allow their kids to smoke and drink at the age of 14. It often starts at their confirmation, because it's the time you are seen as an adult at the church and also in our society.
Last year, when my niece got their confirmation, she was allowed and introduced to drink alcohol ( not the hard stuff of course ).
Fun fact, while we had our coffee and cake with the whole family at the confirmation party, the "Dorfjugend" ( the youth in our very small village of 200 inhabitants) showed up, with them a handcart with beer and other alcohol. They invited her to "officially join" the Dorfjugend and they also invited themselves to our party, of course😆. The last of them went home somewhat around midnight.
When I was young and a member of the Dorfjugend too, we have been 25 members at the age of 14 to the mid twenties. Once a year we went on an overnight trip mostly on camp sites and even the 14-15 years old had their parents permission to take part. One year we had been on a weekend trip to Göteborg (Gothenburg), Sweden by ferry and the younger had been with us, of course.
Not to mention that our parents did not pay a cent for those trips, we paid it out of our "Dorfjugend-Kasse". We collected and earned enough money over the year.
Maybe to give you another / my personal experience with alcohol growing up as a kid in Germany: I think the best friend of my father (with him present of course) offered me my first sip of beer (more foam) at the age of 9. :) I was a kid, and beer is bitter, so of course I didn't like it. I started trying different kinds of alcohol that were on the table of family gatherings when I was 15-16, I believe, and only in sips, because I just never became a big fan. I was a late bloomer too and only went to parties when I was already 21 or so. I drank mixed drinks, but only ever one or two glasses, while some really went with the intention to get drunk. My mindset has not changed on that ever. I'm culturally advantorous, so I really like to try national beverages but I don't force myself. I'm quite happy with alcohol free cocktails when I go out with friends most of the time, because they just taste better to me. :)
One thing to consider is that it's much easier to hide or justify your alcohol dependency when daily drinking is normalized.
Hi, I’m a German and currently living in the USA. I grew up with that German drinking culture where it’s totally normal to drink alcohol (reasonable amounts depending on the age of course). I think drinking at my parents house and also together with my parents helped me learning about my limits when it comes to drinking. My mom always told me that it’s better to experience something like being drunk for the first time or having a bad hangover rather at home than somewhere else where I would do it secretly because I’m not allowed to do it home. It really helped me to get to know my own body and how I react to alcohol. I feel like kids that are not allowed to drink alcohol at home, overdo it as soon as they get the chance to drink (legally or illegally).
I would definitely do it the same way my parents did because I feel like I know how do deal with alcohol very well and I know when it’s just enough so that it doesn’t affect me negatively in the long run.
When I was young I really had a problem with alcohol. I was a teen in the seventies (in Germany) and my parents were very rigorous. They did’nt trust me and don’t respect me. I allways had the feeling I have to hide everything: where I go, who my friends are, parties, my boyfriend and so on. I think: forbidden things are the most dangerous things for parents! And the second place on my list are things you are not allowed to talk about. As an adult I was so shocked about how open minded my friends handled problems with their kids! But this is the key to good relationsships between parents and kids.
I think one of the reasons that the US has a relativly high rate of alcoholism, while being relativly low on the alcohol consumption list is that the US has a much higher rate of teetolers than most european countries.
Be it for religious reasons (many evangelicals and pentecostals abstain from alcohol, so do mormons, muslims, and so on), or for non-religious cultural reasons. So the average consumption is lower, but the people who do drink probably don't drink that much less than their peers in Europe.
About my personal experience growing up in Germany:
My parents were pretty strict, only allowing me what was legal (they were teachers in a small village and feared that if they allowed their son something illegal, they would lose their authority over their pupils on class trips).
Their were two exceptions they allowed when I was 14: Berliner Weiße in summer because it has a very low alcohol content, and a glass of champagne mixed with orange juice on special occasions.
However, at least beer was very normalised. I drank a lot of Apfelschorle because it looked like I was having a beer (and it was often even served in a beer glass back then). And the beer my family normally drinks comes in "Bügelflaschen", the kind of bottles where the lid is attached to the bottle. When I was a kid, it was my job to open them because I really liked the sound that made. It then became my nephews' job. Kids just seem to love this. And and I do believe it kind of normalises beer drinking.
I'm an Israeli living in Berlin for the last 8 years, I always thought we are very "American" In culture, but today I really understand that we more European in many fields, drinking is legal at 18 , the idea is if you old enough to hold weapons in the army than you old enough to drink
🤘 i concur
I congratulate you on choosing "Feli from Germany" as a consultant for German drinking culture. So far, she has always made a very reasonable impression on me in her videos and can certainly say how young people in Bavaria approach the subject of alcohol. By the way, the earrings go perfectly with the dress.
I’m glad you liked seeing her on our channel! She is really great, we love her channel.
In our school we had the option for teachers to call us "sie" at 16 (but they still used the first name). Most teachers asked us if they could still use the "du" (informal) but offered us to also call them by their first name. Most teachers felt almost like collegues at that time and it really made us put even more effort into our schoolwork. (i am from Switzerland)
A major influence on alcoholism is one's own perspective in life or the lack of perspective. If you look at the countries in your list, most countries with a high proportion of alcoholics will also have a high proportion of people on the poverty line in their societies.
(German here.) I was always treated like a little kid, but when it came to alcohol, my parents were always open. And even kinda wanted me to drink. When I came home from parties and said that I didn’t drink anything (which was the truth bc I was never into alcohol), my parents asked my why, instead of saying that’s good. XD
My dad is also a religiously beer drinker and always offers me a bottle, and that started when I was like 15 already. I tried wine the first time shortly before my 15th bday, didn’t like it and never drank again, but my parents always offered me to have something. Or when I was going to parties at friends house, they were like “don’t forget to drink with the cool kids” (not that they found drinking cool, but bc they were trying to get in that teenager-level, where they thought drinking was cool).
It’s crazy to have it at the total opposite (instead of parents asking to drink less, they encourage me to drink more). XD
I particularly appreciated the last point that teachers use the informal forms. Many of my classmates found that they feel old, but I find it very appreciative and respectful as Feli said.
I agree. It's a bit comparable to wearing a school uniform because it makes the students behave differently. If you are addressed with "Sie" by the teacher you will show a more adult behaviour.
That was a really interesting fact - I love that teachers will do that here!
Also school is supposed to prepare you for life and figuring out when to use which form to address someone it tricky for Germans as well and needs practice.
@@MyMerryMessyGermanLife you could make a short video on that subject too. how is this "informal form" culture in Germany for you coming from a you-4all-country. i struggled with US people since it is difficult to know what "distance" to keep in companies with US culture. Many german companies it is also same problem now, cause so many switched to using "Du" only - even with the boss. "You can say you to me"... sometimes it makes conversation/relationship lot more complicated by removing the distance and i feel that the german Du is a lot more Du than a YOU in the US :) if you / Sie verstehen was ich meine :)
@@Alexander-dt2eq Perhaps this is because there are 2 forms of "Du" in English: du = you; Sie (plural) = you
Why keep the polite form?-> it's too easy to say "du A..." and it's harder to say "Sie A...". ;)
I may not be a typical example because (as a German) I probably drink around 0 05 litres of alcohol per year - or less. But I think children shouldn't drink too early and they should see at home that it is also possible to party and have fun without alcohol. In my opinion it is important that they learn that having fun and drinking alcohol are not synonymous for adults.
I was brought up with a really relaxed relationship with alcohol I learned from my parents that alcohol is something to enjoy, like chocolate. My parents explained quite clearly that with alcohol there is this point where everything just is a little bit more fun, which is fine and then there is this line one does not want to go over. But my parents also tiled me that when young almost everybody crosses this line at least once, and if so I should just call them and be save. And to this day when drinking alcohol I always watch out for this red line. I enjoy a glass here and there more for the taste, when on a party I may get a little tipsy (though there weren’t so many parties in the last years) but I never get drunk.
I think the biggest difference is what society as a whole finds acceptable regarding alcohol. In Italy, drinking moderately is considered to be normal, but to be drunk, especially in public, is a big nono. In Germany, people find being drunk more acceptable, and in America, it is the thing to do. I am half Italian and half German, by the way.
My personal impression regarding alcohol consumption growing up in Germany is that most Germans get drinking out of their systems by the time they are 20.
At 14/15 in my friend group it was normal to drink at birthday parties. Our parents bought it for us. I was also allowed to drink at home. Of course we often ended up completely wasted and had hangovers and that seems bad at that age. But we also got to learn our own limits by the time we were legally allowed to buy our own alcohol. And since we weren't forbidden to drink it also wasn't like a big mystery and just not that special after some time. So definitely pros and cons in my opinion.
Definitely think that if you are responsible enough to drive a car etc., you should be allowed to drink if you want to. So 21 just doesn't seem reasonable to me.
I like this approach - find your limits and learn about the effects of alcohol at home with your parents. It seems to be a smart approach!
- I think the critical differences between the two "top ten" lists are the alcoholic beverages drunk in these different countries. In the top ten consumption countries alcohol is mostly consumed in the form of beer or wine, whereas in many countries of the top alcoholism list it is hard liquor (esp. Wodka) in all those eastern European countries.
- Personal experiences with alcohol: My grandma tried to give me beer around the age of six, but i did not like the botterness of it. At home with my parents I think they gave me a small glass of wine at an age of about 14, when they drank themselves. I did not really appreciate it, but still I sipped. I started to drink beer as my standard alcoholic drink at an age of 17, when I joined the voluntary fire brigade of our village and I think at that time I also started to get intixicated occasionaly. From that ime on until about 30 I was drinking beer quite often, say on a daily basis. Since then, hiowever, my consumption of alcoholic drinks has been decreasing steadily and now I still do drink beer as my standard alcoholic, but maybe once in a fortnight, the occasional Schnaps and close to no wine at all - and only when I am going out or we have an invitation at our house.
- How you call your parents is up to them. The usual thing is to call them Mama and Papa all your life, but in some - not really frequent - cases parents teach their little children to call them by their first names and this is what they do from then on. Even grandparents are called Oma and Opa as long as they live. Me and my siblings didn't even have to add their first names, since we close to never met all of them at once. Our grandchildren do add our first names to Oma and Opa, since we all four meet quite frequently in their presence. Thus, to attract the attention of the person they're meaning to talk to, they have to add the first names.
A related topic is how you call your aunts and uncles and while writing the above sentences I remembered that I changed the way I called them when I was about 15 or 16 years old. Our parents tought us to say Tante or Onkel and then add the first name of the person. Even with some close friends of our parents we were tought to do the same. At a certain time I felt that it was not correct to do the latter and I started to leave away the Onkel and Tante addressing these couples. They all immediately agreed and a little later I started to do the same, addressing my true aunts and uncles. Neither of them objected. I felt that this was the right thing to do if I wanted to stop being the child to them, but become a serious partner for conversation and I think they all recognized this as a step in my development that was to be appreciated.
I think it's very crucial in what kind of group you are socialized as a teenager. Groups like Feli described worked very well in taking care of each other and not pushing the limits. I was lucky to grow up with friends who also liked to party but always looked out for each other. There can be a whole different experience when your environment is toxic and careless and you get pushed to do things you really don't want to. Even in my friendship bubble there were stronger and lesser drinkers... the stronger drinkers usually got in touch through their family way earlier and it was normal to get drunk at family parties with aunts and uncles more often. I grew up with my mother and she really did not like to get drunk or really did not like to see me get drunk... so I had a different emotion towards alcohol. And also I never liked beer, even to this day.
MIGHT BE A TOPIC SOON FOR THE OLDEST!!! :D :D "dorfjugend" "burschenverein" etc .... i would luv to see everthinng jus about that :) love ur content McFalls!!!!!!!
Hard to believe for a German living in Ireland - I don't really like alcohol or let's say the taste of it. I use it as cooking ingredient, but that's about the extent of if. I guess my father would've offered me a beer when I was 16, but I was never interested. Now I get tipsy on a pint of Guinness, so nah, not for me. One should be able to enjoy a drink or two and not just knock it down as if it was water, ending up one loosing their senses completely and behaving embarassing or stupid when being tanked up to the brim. I used to know a girl who knocked away a whole bottle of red wine by herself before she even went out, she called it "Vorgluehen". So generally I don't mind people enjoying a few drinks, but it should be consumed sensibly, maturely and moderately, knowing their limits and then it is absolutely ok and legit. Getting drunk constantly and over the top drunk (I don't mean alcoholism or alcohol additiction here, which is on another level) when going out is just not a good behaviour and can lead to addiction
One good side effect of german legal ages is, that most germans have finished experimenting with alcohol, when they are allowed to drive a car.
A hamster? What happened to No 2?
Have a lovely Sunday! ♥🌻
😭👀🤔
Oh gosh! Stuart would be totally offended I forgot him. I am not yet used to the two hamsters yet I guess...
@@kevinmcfall5285 Thanks goodness, I was just worried for your kids. I know how hard it is to lose a pet as a kid and I am happy that is not the case.
@@hildegardkhelfa5358 it was amazing that Ginger could not only avoid getting eaten by the cat but steal her food to stay alive! That's one resourceful hamster.
@@kevinmcfall5285absolutely fascinating. It must be outstanding clever. So, most definitely a "Super Hamster" 😁
I.
I‘m from Germany in the Rhineland. My mother only gave me three pieces of advice, when I was young:
1. Never drink alone!
(You should make sure you‘ve got the social control by being with friends that you trust.)
2. Never drink through the day before about 6 pm
(if you start the day with alcohol or use it at daytime, you easily lose control by habitualising.)
3. Never drink when you are crossed in love or lovesick!
(Alcohol must never be seen as a solution - especially when you feel strong emotions, like depression, unhappiness, failure.)
II.
Actually in my town, alcohol was not such big deal in my youth. I think I started drinking alcohol, now and then, at parties when I was 18. Before, there was no alcohol at parties of my friends or me.
But we always heard, that especially in Bavaria people drink a hell lot more than in the rest of Germany. So for me and my friends our 16th birthday was not so special as Feli experienced it. I do not remember any alcohol, then. I think it wasn‘t even a topic to us.
But when about 18 or 19 I remember we started meeting with friends about two or three times, with the outright intension to get really drunk. We bought Vodka, other hard stuff and juice (to mix it) and started in the night in a small circle.
III.
My mother always knew about that. I never hid anything from her. My friends‘ parents also knew, when we drank alcohol.
(My mother was a well respected teacher at school, btw. She was known to be fair AND strict. My aunt was a state prosecutor, my best friend‘s father was a tax investigator - that type of German who obeys every rule and dead erious and correct in everything he did. So it was all totally normal and relaxed in respect of alcohol in good middle-class families and circles.)
Hi, me as a German think that because of the fact that we get know the good and bad sides of alcohol consumption from a quiet young age on. Because it's not a tabu topic and also something that is discussed in families, peer groups or friendships oftenly, you always have the feeling that you're not unnormal by drinking and even if you feel you've got a problem with it, you will easily find held and WON'T BE JUDGED for it. I guess these are main reasons why alcohol consumtion without abuse or addiction function way better in Germany than in the US. It's always better to be aware of your own weaknesses and stand to it instead of hide them, and that's a social thing that imo the US do a really bad job at.
I am the second of three kids so my parents went through the whole process with my older sister before I turned 14-15.... it was very relaxed...I still remember my mother telling me on a Friday night before I left the house to meet friends: when you are drunk tonight be sick outside first and then come inside;) such a practical approach
lol
🤣
Bei uns hieß es : wer bricht, der wischt!
A case of beer is usually either 20 x 0,5 l or 24 x 0,33 l. Some smaller breweries may have different case sizes.
My teachers started using the Sie from 11th grade onwards, but in the combination of Sie + first name. There was no consultation or variation, all of them did it.
Defining "alcoholism" is also part of this, and differs. Not going out without a glass a day could be considered alcoholism, vs not being able to go without a glass of alcohol, and a lot of people not going without it, but thinking they could if they wanted, often surprised it was more hard then they thought.
Or like mentioned before, I only drank and partied at the weekends, but the amount of alcohol I consumed at times could be technically be labeled as a form of alcoholism. Drinking cultures have more problems defining what is or is not alcoholism, IMPOV.
I had the personal experience that being taught a healthy relationship with alcohol at a young age makes the mystery of it go poof gone. So I immediately thought that drink tastests like s*it so I didn't start drinking at all. I had one bad experience with alcohol at 16 and since then I've not drank more than 1 small glass of wine in some special occasion.
If you don't know the healthy relationship with alcohol and it seems like a big mystery why you are not allowed to drink it makes a bad situation for kids. They are intrigued by things that are forbidden 🚫. If you tell your kids: "If you feel like drinking or even smoking seems interesting for you(bc of your friends or whatever) don't do it in secret, please. Just tell us we'll get it for you so you can try at home, you won't get in trouble but be safe at home." That takes all of the interest out of those things. My parents said this to me and so I never tired a smoke with friends or whatever. I knew if I'd really wanted to try it I could go to my parents and that's in my opinion why I never wanted to try it. There was nothing intriguing about it. You know what I mean ?
Oh yes. We moved to Germany in 72. I didnt drink a lot but drank wine and beer sometimes. Never had any issues with drinking just curfew hours.
My parents in Germany) would have allowed us beer with 14 no problem, my grandpa would give us a cloth handkerchief dipped in dark beer, to sooth us as babies when teething.
BUT I never was really drunk in my entire life (41yo now). I do drink a nice glass of wine when we have a nice dinner or on vacation I don't really drink any beer. Since it was never a tabu or a rebellious act, and I don't like the taste I never had a reason to drink alot
I come from a small village in germany and for me it started with all that drinking stuff at 15. I would say we got drunk a lot until passing like 25 then it fell of.
Getting hard liqueur was no problem at all on birthdays often the parents buying the stuff.
We and our friends were allowed to smoke and drink at home. My parents wanted us save. They always said its better to smoke and drink and missjugde your limits when someone is there and can step in. They didnt want as to drink at the shore of Neckar or Rhein. Its obviosly dangerous.
I drank a lot and got waisted a few times, Smoking the same. To be honest I was bored a lot and everyone that got out in the evening drank. There just wasnt much else to do and it was a thing to be competetive in a way. I grew out of it when I finally got my licence at 18. Since my 20th birthday I never had more than 2 beer, since my 1st pregnancy 10 years ago I didnt drink or smoke again. I dont miss it at all.
There is always that one friend, that didnt make it out. Who still drinks too often and maybe too much, but in the end we all are high achievers with good Jobs, families...
My 3 girls are nearly grown up now. Our youngest is 17. They had there experience with alcohol befor they Start to drive a car with 18. I think it is good If driving a car and trinking alcohol dont starts at the same. time.
In the Netherlands drinking beer and wine is legal at 16. Hard liquor at 18. Same as Germany. However, my daughter was in the USA (Illinois) for a Highschool Year when she was 17 and she experienced the kids in the US drinking much more than kids in the Netherlands.
No it isn’t legal at 16. Since 2014 there no difference between liquor and beer and wine. The limit is 18 for all kinds of alcohol, buying, possession and drinking. Remember the government promotional video NIX18, meaning nothing before 18. I believe in Belgium it is beer and wine at 16, liquor at 18, but not The Netherlands. Maybe your children fooled you or you’re fooling your parents (I don’t know your age).
@@RealConstructor correct, I'm old. Thanks for the heads-up. Only at home parents can allow to drink alcohol below 18.
Please stop making shorts !! I never watch them and I find that you're getting lazy with your videos and I think your channel is great but you're really getting into the short videos and people don't like them.
I remember being allowed to try Sect on new years regardless of age for my sister and me but we never liked it so it was always just a sip. But as my parents are really not drinkers and don't even have much in stock other then some red wines, which still taste horrible to me, we never really were tempted because we knew we were always allowed to try and experience things. Later on at 16-17 I changed school and then the parties started but I never was the type to go overboard and the friends parents would also be on call duty or the morning shift to drive people home after we cleaned the house of our mess of course. So alcohol is a part of life and later on also part of culture in university but we learnt moderation and responsibility so that we still for example expect our friends to text they got home save after a party.
In Germany my mother let me sip of her wine whenever I wanted to when I was a child, even in the age of 7. I only took one sip and was satisfied. This took the whole magic forbidden-fruit-feeling away and later I never had a problem controlling alcohol.
In Europe alcoholic drinks are part of the eating culture, while in the USA alcoholic drinks might be more part of the party culture.
Depends on the area and country. The eating culture thing is very Mediterranen. But there is also party and binge drinking. The UK is basically exclusively that. Germany has both. There is drinking for social reasons, but there is also drinking to get drunk at certain occasions.
Yeah this is a distinct difference.
I remember being 15 and for a while we had a handful of people at school miss school somewhat regularly (and I mean it happened once or twice to them) because they had to go to the hospital for alcohol poisoning.
I didn't drink until I was 19, because I did have a case of alcoholism in the immediate family and I was scared.
I went to a few parties but none of my friends overdid drinking really.
One of my friends lived alone at 15 (officially her mom lived there but effectively she had permanently moved out to live with her boyfriend). So we did celebrate the new year there and people were drinking but nobody threw up or passed out or whatever.
I think the only real problems like alcohol poisoning occured around the ages of 15 to 16 but it was definitely not the majority. Like I know of 3 boys in my whole school at the time. I think there will always be a few who just don't know where to stop and take a bit longer to figure it out, but yeah.
I know a lot of friends tried alcohol but didn't really enjoy it until much later, much like myself.
I'd say my parents were almost more worried because I *didn't* show much interest in going to house paries and drinking 😅
I started going out and really drinking when I was 19 and had already moved out. Had fun with regularly doing that for about 3 years or so and then I gradually stopped again. Now I'm 31 and I'll have a beer now and then or like a cider or Hugo or whatever, but I don't drink regularly at all anymore :)
I started drinking alcohol at 16 and first dosen't liked beer. I drank wormwood with coke oder white wine. In my group of friends alcohol was not a very big thing. I did get totaly pissed 4 times til the age of 21 and after that only one or two times. The group of friends of my brother (4 years younger) drank a lot more and did dangerous things when drunk. My brother made an accident with his car, because he was drunk and fall asleep driving (nothing serious happend). So, the group of friends your with at the age from 15 to 20 is very important for drinking habbits.
Did I miss something? "Is today collaboration day?"
Feli from Germany & My Merry Messy Life
Black Forest Family & Lauren in Germany
I had easy access to alcohol since I was 14, also I had some friends who started drinking at 14, 15. Some shops didn't check IDs and some friends had falsified student IDs. I equally saw friends getting really wasted. As for me, I didn't start drinking until I was 20. These days I drink maybe 4 times a year. I am still involved with youth work and I have noticed that today's kids seem to drink less, then my generation did 10 or 15 years ago.
Oh that’s interesting that you feel like you’re seeing kids drinking less.
@@MyMerryMessyGermanLife I am a scout leader. Back when I was a teenager in scouts there was a lot of drinking especially of mixed drinks containing hard liquor and most adult leaders did not really mind.
These days I feel that some of the teens are more mindful of personal health and nutrition. I feel they consume less hard liquor than my generation used to and gladly stick to beer and wine. (At camp we let kids 16 years and older drink beer and wine but there is a limit, of course the younger teens will sometimes try to "steal" a bottle or two, if they get caught they get some sort of punishment like extra chores). Btw most parents are aware of teens drinking at youth programmes.
@@MyMerryMessyGermanLife it does show in the statistics. 40% of young Germans don’t drink alcohol
This conversation, and Kevin’s nervous laugh when some subjects are broached, reminds me of how many hangups most Americans have. You get that here in Frankfurt once in a while talking to tourists: schock and awe from Amis concerning how Europeans deal with many of life’s experiences.
What I never did because my father and my grandfather did extreme was smoking. I still remember if I had a cold it was a horror to breath in the smoke.
Germany litterary perfect age 14 beer,wine
And liquers at 16
I remember my parents often (not always of course) havin a beer or wine with Abendbrot or later on while we were watching TV. Usually a bottle of wine would last them up to uwo or three nights, so you can tell they were having only a glas (maybe two) for the pure enjoyment of drinking a nice, tasty glas of wine ... So alcohol was not demonized in my house, it was not something that was done in secret. I had a friend whos parents would not drink before the children went to bed and she must have been under the impression, that they were doing something illegal. This was not the case in my family.
What I do remember is, when we visited my grandparents every couple of weeks, everyone got a glas of champagne mixed with orange juice (it is a typical welcome-cocktail called "Mimosa" as far as I know). Of course, my sister and I wanted a welcome drink as well so we got one, but with one part champagne and nine parts juice (while the adults had about 50% juice and 50% Champagner). We always felt very grown up, standing there with our champagner flute among the adults, toasting and drinking :)
As I grew older, I started drinking "Weinschorle" with my parents (which ist white wine mixed with sparkeling water). I´m not sure how old I was but definitly under 14 years. And it was totally normal und ok with them.
Here is the thing : I think my parents were doing a smart move, allowing me (and my sister) to drink alcohol at a rather young. Of course, there was a line, that they would very carefully watch not to cross (unkown to me, of course). I don´t think they would have ever allowed us any hard liquor or a third (fourth or fifth) glas of "Weinschorle" at an evening. But they were able to let me and my sister believe that we could drink alcohol whenever we felt like doing so. And when the time came where our friends and classmates hide inside their parents garage with a stolen bottle of Whisky or Gin, neither me nor my sister would join them because it was not attractiv to us. We knew alcohol (or at least we thought so), our parents were cool with it (again, at least we thought so) and there was no need for us to try cheep Whisky from the gasstation in secret, sitting in an icecold garage, when we were allowed a nice glas of wine in the comford of our own living room.
Today, my husband and I are doing the same thing with our sons. They are 13 and 15 years and they like to drink "Radler" (Beer mixed with Sprite or SevenUp). They also like "Weinschorle" when it is really hot outside. Our oldest was 13 years when we allowed him his first "Radler" at a family BBQ.
To end this story: my olders son was at a summer camp this August. A few of the kids there needed to be picked up by their parents from the youth hostel they were staying at because they were TOTALLY drunk ... it was their first stay away from home and one of them got his hands on some hard alcohol. Our boy did not participate in this (even though he was sharing a room with some of them) because (quote) "...why should I ? I tried Vodka before and did not like it".
And that is exactly what we tried to accomplish ... make something unattractiv by allowing it under parental supervion.
Feli did such a nice job answering ur so interisting questions!!!! luv it !!!
German experiences are somewhat similar, when I read the comments. I believe that has mostly to do with the drinking culture at your home. My parents did drink a beer for dinner, or a glass of wine, sometimes had a Cognac or such in the evening -- and I never have seen them inebriated. I think that this is a good sign. As an adolescent I was also drinking at home or with my parents in a restaurant, never as much as to really affect me. Yes, eventually I got drunk several times, I but I never drank to get drunk, it always just happened in good company, good mood, and a bright atmosphere, always unintentionally and always with the unpleasant side effects the next day. These were the best motivator to stop drinking before I get drunk.
Something that we always did: get some foam of the beer or we were allowed to drink the last sip, about a teaspoon to a tablespoon full of beer -- even as little children.
Maybe, if your parents are drinking too much at home, or you see the effects, and if you're kept on a short leash at home -- then there is a good chance for you to become an excessive drinker, at least for a while.
My "Klassenlehrerin" made a lot of fuss about reaching the legal age. I was the first kid in our class to turn 18. She gifted me a book and asked for permission to continue addressing me with "du". She also explained that from now on, I wouldn't need my parents signature for missing classes (due to sickness etc.) anymore, but would sign the notice myself :)
I personally dislike alcohol and have never been drunk. I was never interested in it. Of course as a teen, I often felt like a party pooper just like Feli, but at the same time I was sure this was right for me so I stuck to it. I still got invited to things and became friends with other people that didn't care too much about alcohol. So when we met up, alcohol was around but it wasn't the centre of attention as it seems to be for many people that age. It really does seem to depend on the friend group you're in.
Most kiosks just sell alcohol to underage teenagers; in germany it is really easy to get a beer.
What I really missed in this episode was a bit of your habits and way of handling alcohol drinking. Since I am German all was pretty much just the way it works. No surprises whatsoever. Nevertheless I really find it absolutely weird people in the US using brown bags for their alcohol. Where is the point there? I don’t get it
Anyways as always it was fun watching you wrapping your head about local way of doing things.
I'm from Bavaria. Beer is part of our culture. In my family my mother came from the Holledau from a family, that produced hop. When we ate lunch in the middle of the table stood a 0,5 l mug of "Radler", 2/3 Soda, 1/2 Lagerbeer. My mother had her own glass with the rest of the beer of the bottle (about 0,3 beer), our father and we 2 kids drank Radler. It was in that way in my childhood, as long as I remember. My mother is now 85 years old, still drives a car, no medicine, healthy. Never saw her drunken neither, nor my father. I personally drink a few alcohol, at feasts, with guests, perhaps 2 beers in a year, a little liquor.
I know a family, where the kids were forbidden every single drop of alcohol until they were 18. They reminded us, when our daughter celebrated her 16th birthday with a bowl of punch, because there was some wine in it. 3 years later my daughter said to me, that she was invited to the bithday of the girl of that family, but won't go there, because she wasn't in the mood to pay such an amount of money for the drunkeness of other people. The girl collected 10 EUR of every guest to buy liquor. That girl and her friends turned out to be drunken every weekend, and not with beer, but with harder drinks. Perhaps it is better to teach the children how to handle with alcohol, than just to forbid, because forbidden apples are the best.
From all of the stories told here I’m thinking that’s in general, true!
My dad let me try beer foam when I was in elementary and asked him if I could try. Since it's so bitter, I really disliked it and wondered what was wrong with my dad to like that.
The first time, I drank "real" alcohol was at an 13th birthday of a friend of mine, I was 11, we went and bought an "alco-pop", they used to be sold for 16 year olds, now for 18 year olds. At that time the controls weren't as strict and you could buy stuff at kiosks and they wouldn't really care. We shared the 0,33 bottle with like 5-6 kids.
The next time was for my 13th birthday, we got one mixed beer to share and one "kleiner feigling" (hard liquor) for everyone. After being 14 I regularly (every couple of months) had parties in my garden but we hardly had people who overdrank, occasionally someone would have too much and vomit, but really not very often. I always had enough Sprudel there and encouraged people to drink water as well, also we lit the cabin with candles and had to restock the oven with firewood so we had to be careful. The "heavy" drinking kind of stopped when finishing school and starting college. There were still parties with much alcohol but each year it was less. We only went to a bar for a couple of cocktails and that's it. Nowadays people drink 1-2 beers at a pub or when meeting friends or some wine for dinner and that's it.
My mom didn't really say anything and my dad said "if you barf on your pillow, you'll have to clean that up yourself".
For myself, and I recommend this rule for everyone, I don't drink, when I'm sad. I don't drink when I'm alone, I only drink for a happy time with friends or family and good food. (I have softened the rule about "alone" a couple of times, when I came back from a field day, warm summer evening and enjoyed one mixed beer or a cold glass of white wine :-) )
In my family, we mostly had the "kids" and "adult" parties separated, but another friend of mine always had everyone there, her friends and family, so people from age 14 to age 80+ (plus the kids and toddlers who were sent to bed at some point) were there together, drinking, dancing eating and having fun. I really loved going there.
Regarding Teachers and "Du" vs. "Sie", growing up in northern Germany most of my teachers actually didn't started addressing us formally in 11th grade, but offered us the informal address, and we addressed them with their first name for pretty much all of high school.
Moin
Make sure you also check out the interview we did with Feli on parenting differences between the USA and Germany here! ruclips.net/video/v8nGGKhVatY/видео.html
I remember the first time I really overdid it with hard alcohol. Me, 14 at the time, and my friends managed to get a hold of a whole package of Feiglinge for the anual "Erntedank"-Dorffest. My parents were fine with me drinking at the fest, especially because they knew all the other people (all from our village) there would look out for us. We all had experience with beer but not with harder stuff and the others in the end didn't want to drink it, so I thought I'd just drink all of it on my own. I crashed pretty fast, went home at about 7 pm, was struggling to walk and talk and just felt like crap. I told my parents I was going to bed, they ofc knew I was drunk and my mum just told me to take a bucket to bed with me (great advice). Since then I can't drink Schnaps any more, the smell makes me sick and I have images of that night spent over a bucket in my head 😄
I feel like for me it was great that I could test my limits within the safety of my family, my village, my friends house etc. I never had to hide that I've had alcohol, I didn't have to get myself into unsafe situations to avoid my parents or law enforcement knowing I drunk alcohol. Also testing your limits before having a drivers licence is a good thing I think, nobody is tempted to drive home drunk. You learn your limit and the limitations of your drunk body before even being able to drive.
i come originally from east germany (GDR / DDR), and you was part of the adults there with 14, after jugendweihe (ceremony in which teenagers are given adult social status, in 8th grade) and after that you could drink, teachers asked you if they should call you "sie" and "mister" etc.
European children given greater respect and responsibility. So that allows them the freedom to be treated more adult like within reason. Thus allowing a lower drinking age which ties in culturally.
I think you’ve really hit the nail on the head with this thought!
Die evangelischen Teenager z.B. in Hessen haben mit ca. 14 Konfirmation. Die Konfirmanden gehen dann nach der Kirche durch den Ort und bekommen von den Verwandten und Bekannten Konfigeld und Bier zugesteckt. Das ist so eine Art Initiation in die Erwachsenenwelt.