The Disillusionment of Dating Apps (basically they suck now)
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- Опубликовано: 28 сен 2024
- Hey guys! In today’s video, I decided to talk about the fall of dating apps which is dramatic but also true. We have way too many dating apps and the combination of social media and capitalism makes it even harder especially for minorities. Algorithms and just general crappy people can make dating online nearly impossible as the pandemic has made a bunch of us start using dating apps personally, I have deleted all of them and I'm over it! In this video, I highlight, the dating apps I was on, my personal experience, decision fatigue, algorithms, capitalism, comparing people to what we see online, and more! Let me know your experiences on dating apps and if anything resonates.
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hi! my name is Zhariya Smith and I make commentary videos about things that I find interesting. I am a 22-year-old currently living in Atlanta
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I hate the way dating apps feel so competitive. It turns me off knowing someone is probably talking to at least 5 other people. It just feels too superficial for me.
This is an odd complaint because even the most deformed & conventionally unattractive woman will get more likes than the most average male.
You at least have access to the handsome guy wheras the sub-average and even above average looking men have to swipe 10x more for 1 match.
@@Foomanlol facts, dating apps are skewed heavily in favour of women. Hundreds of matches for most women while a few matches if any for most men
@@toheeb07it’s because there are three times more men than women on the apps
its becouse there is enormous imbalance of matches for man, most handsome guys get most of the matches, avarage dudes and below get literally nothing ( this coming from avarage dude with 0 matches ). There are three times more dudes than woman on these apps so yeah.. paradox of choice.
@@Arejen03 it’s all about photography and face tuning.
There are average guys that kill it on bumble & tinder if they pay for the premium service and professional photos.
The question is do you want to even compete for the low quality superficial people.
Cold approach is better because almost no one does it anymore.
Not me getting ads for dating apps on this video 😒🙄😮💨
lol i hate that
you could not pay me to make a dating app profile. The act of self-analyzing and picking the most societally appealing aspects of yourself to post on an app is so reductive, it’s like an exercise in self harm.
The things that a good partner will find most beautiful and attractive about you will likely not be things you can control, and will often not be things you are even aware of about yourself.
See I did the opposite. I put what I wanted people to see so I could weed out all the women that wouldn't be interested. And it worked great.
So accurate and beautifully written.
it's all about ego and is very addicting.
I never understood why so many young men (usually men) can say such psychotic stuff to a woman on a dating app.
Probably just looking for stuff they can put online like on Reddit
@@TheMysteryDriverlmao fr
I dunno, probably because a very large percentage of men have deeply rooted misogynistic hatred
No one taught them to not be psychos, and they can't suffer meaningful consequences when they're hidden behind an internet connection.
@@PhoenicopterusR Most people act one way online and another way offline. Dating apps are essentially an extended version of Reddit r/dating, but you get to see how people interact instead of what they claim happened in their post. Guys for some reason say all sorts of deranged things when they are online, but offline you wouldn’t know how they really felt unless you were speaking to them one-on-one with them and asked them these questions. That’s how I screen guys and know what’s up within 20 minutes of speaking to them. They literally tell you their red flags when you ask the right questions.
To all the people like "I found my partner on this app and we're so happy and yada yada" ain't nobody wanna hear that. Blessings, but please shut up. Dating in general gets progressively worse every single year, but it is HIGHLY location dependent. I will probably never find anyone worth my time as long as I live in the boonies and I highly suggest to anyone in the trenches like me to consider moving to a new city ASAP.
the way i just hollered
Also, those people lie. The actual percentage of couples who marry someone they met on a dating app, and are actually happy in their relationship is very small. I notice those who find “happiness” on these apps tend to be immature and focus more on the sex aspect of their relationship, so I wouldn’t trust what those people say till a couple years in to the marriage, and based on the numbers the average divorce for these couples is 1-5 years, so not too good. Anyway, congrats to those that actually do put in the work to have a healthy marriage regardless of how they met their partner.
But you’re a woman tho you have more options so that says allot about you.
I agree and they be saying this whilst they are still in the honeymoon phase too 😅😴
i live in the hood in toronto and guys don’t take me seriously and think i’m a freak bc the ppl i grew up around are freaks and hoes
The first time I was on tinder I was swiped on by this beautiful woman right.
So Ofc I inquire as one does, I say “hey :)))”
Three smiles because one is too little and two isn’t excessive enough to garner attention, and immediately she messages “you’re southern Sudanese ik that d big”
The astonishment on my basically virgin 18 year old face.
Every other interaction is like that/or I’m just ghosted cause they realize I’m tryna have a conversation 😂
I’m not saying I pull, these are just the interactions I’ve had as a tall black beautiful masc, and it’s horrible, it’s actually horrible.
I told it like a joke but I hope y’all know how dehumanizing that is
no yeah it sucksss being black on dating apps like immediately being seen as a sexual object is the most dehumanizing thing
@@Tirrrb that's awful :(
Jesus, I'm sorry you have to deal with trash people like that.
Tinder is mostly for hookups. Every girl I met on tinder sent nudes and wanted to hook up ASAP.
I’ve realized through using dating apps that if you’re looking for something serious…you’re better off meeting someone in person! Dating apps have been saturated over the years by those that are dating without intention and seeking quick validation.
Man I have lost count as to how many times I have gotten ghosted
I feel like we need the story on getting banned from Tinder lol
i’ll make a short lol
Ya I always wonder how people get banned on there.
Tinder bans so easily
I got bad because I said I wanted to date women only, based on being the same sex
I would much rather meet someone organically, I gotta feel your energy right away. I don’t care if I’ma be single forever, I REFUSE to do dating apps!
That's why I think hobby or activity apps like meetup can work for people. Go meet people doing things you enjoy or might enjoy and maybe you'll meet someone you like through that
Yes I think IRL is the way to go altho it can have its own challenges
I'm on Feeld and most of the people I've interacted with are absolutely trash. It's disappointing. A whole lot of creeps, weirdos, and disrespectful people. Not to mention the men who are clearly cheating on their wives (it's supposed to be for polyamorous people).
What is it with cheaters disrespecting spaces for polyamory? Like, that's not at all what this is for, why are you here?
@@mewmew6158 IDK, maybe they think poly people are more likely to be open to it? Which... No. I'm not about to be the other woman. Yuck.
they think their disregard for people (their partners specifically) is a shared experience and they don’t understand that polyamorous people aren’t actually like that, and can’t see why someone would actually be polyamorous because they don’t want honest relationships if they are seeking out affairs
Yea I can't stand feeld.
@@amberrichards2778 ironically, we're the least likely to go in for it.
I’ve just been burnt out by dating apps in general.
As an autistic black man in his mid 20s, the dating apps I’ve used and spent money on, have brought me a lot of fatigue, anxiety, and left me feeling very desperate. Mainly because it was always so difficult to get a match in the first place. I even try to go out of my way to read the bios. But after a while, it just becomes very draining.
Having not used a dating app in a while I feel I’m in a much better place emotionally because I’ve been able to just go out and meet people.
Granted, I’m still single, and I don’t really know how to change that because trying to get a date in real life feels a lot more daunting now. Especially when you barely know a person.
In general, I just don’t like the dating game. I’d rather just skip all the BS and just have honest conversations but it feels like that’s actively discouraged in our current dating culture.
I pray that you find your person! Keep going, they are out there. The GOD I serve wants that for you!! Stay encouraged 🙏🏾
Find a hobbie bro , you'll be able to meet people of similar interest
Dating apps are terrible u got a better chance of meeting people outside of Dating
@@theman9048 facts plus better looking women at that
i tried dating apps for a while after a bad breakup nuked my self esteem and i had so many awkward convos and then hooked up with one guy and one older woman and both were pretty coercive. after that i fell for a long time tumblr friend and now weve been living together for three years lmao
Congratulations on your tumblr friend! It’s nice to see a bit of positivity here ❤
My wish is for this video (open, raw, honest and cathartic for the rest of us who may be somewhat embarrassed to admit to these very same failures) not to make the rounds in the incel side of RUclips…
too late I already have guys on here calling me ugly lol
once on the app where they can message you before you match, i got a random message saying my “B side is probably better than my A side” the things people will say behind a keyboard always stuns
@ThatGuy-bh9qh to randomly message someone, off a picture of their face, and say their B side is probably better than A side, it leads the reader to believe it is in fact not about music and there was no musical references on my profile what the fuck kind of leap 😭😭😭
Dating apps are a business that exploits the single, I feel more interaction in person would be more beneficial. Also, F.D. Shared I like you content🎉
My ex married a woman he met on pof, yet I'm still single? I hate seeing him happy, because I have no one and it's annoying because I've tried to meet people online. So hard to meet a decent guy who doesn't just want a hook up. It's all about sex online, and that's it. ❤❤
That the L he winning and u not
The struggle I’ve had on dating apps is (and I hate self-flattery) I’m decently attractive and give off jock vibes, I was one in highschool and hated myself severely. But as I went to college I ditched that being someone I wasn’t and embraced how much of a nerd I was, D&D MTG older PC games like half life and Diablo, but the problem was when I matched with people they were bluntly only into the way I looked and what I could be shaped into. So it just feels like I can’t really be myself on these apps if I want to get matches or anywhere past “hey”.
I have recently started on the dating apps after a 3 year off and on with a dismissive avoidant. As a man it feels like I have in a race that I will never win. Anymore I think I'll just stay single. Work and life is hard enough. When I am competing with hundreds of men for one women's attention it's just not worth it. I am not into the bar scene and as a salary manager I can't meet someone at work where I spend the majority of my waking hours.
Tbh you are so pretty. I feel like pretty women have a hard time on dating apps because theyre not going to settle for the unattractive people, but anyone attractive is so cocky
thankyou for your compliment so many of the people in this comment section are calling me ugly 🤣
@@ZhariyaAleice ignore them, thats just youtube comments in general. Literally everyone gets called ugly and the commenter is always someone who wont show their face
@@ZhariyaAleiceyou are subhuman at best, listen to the comments ma’m
The delusion is crazy af it is the exact opposite ATTRACTIVE women DO NOT have this problem
Dating app should be deleted off the internet
The biggest problem with dating apps is it’s a 3/1 ratio of male to female users. So most women get bombarded with matches. 80% of guys get less than 5 matches a week, half of those only get 3-5 matches a month. And 9/10 matches stop communicating. So people like me have to swipe on 200 profiles to get only a few responses, and 90% of them don’t last more than a couple of responses. Tried 9 dating apps in 3 years, only 7 dates and only one had a second date. I’m done officially retired from dating
I know people who have gotten married off of all of them. But then I became a single mom and was single for years. I started looking on Facebook dating. So many more normal conversations and less gross guys. It’s not known for the hotties…but I found it’s really normal.
Why are people getting on the one app for hookups and complaining about being solicited for a hookup?
LOL!
Honestly, the delusion on display here was weird but you make a lot of excellent points. It’s like self aware but still part of the problem?
what delusion 😭
@@ZhariyaAleicehe's saying you may not be as attractive as you think and are probably having difficulty because you're trying to match with people more attractive than you. Same issue many guys are probably having on those apps.
I feel bad because I did find the loml on Bumble. Stay the course y’all; she was right about Bumble 😂
Just curious, how long were you on there before meeting them?
@@crackity_j like...3-4 months? I did delete and re-download a few times tho.
Girl I relate so much! Im 27, downloaded Tinder for the first time around 19 and been on and off since. I feel like its part of ALL relationships being less healthy across society nowadays. But it can be really dissapointing. Also it sounds like youve had some really bad matches, Im sorry you experienced that💕
Tig ole bitties/bittys has been around since 1995 or so. I was born in 1991 and grew up hearing that phrase a lot, actually. That's where Your Favorite Martian got the song idea. Ray William Johnson is also a millennial so he would have grown up hearing it too. Also, POF is very millennial. My younger sister is 29 and met her fiance on there in 2019. By the way, this video is really interesting as a person who's been married since 2012 and is like a decade older than you are. I'm grateful I don't have to deal with any of this, because I would just be single forever.
To all the women in the comments saying he's wrong... Let me translate his words for you.
As an independent woman, you've made it clear that you are committed to a lot of other things first, before a man. Your whole life comes first. He comes last, and he can either appreciate his space on the outside, or leave. He's not allowed to expect anything from you. You're not changing anything for him, because you feel like compromising any part of yourself for a man would be losing to the patriarchy.
And that's all fine, if you want to be an independent woman living her own life, with a partner you share some of your time with, and the two of you live your own lives and enjoy each others' presence, that's fine, that's a realistic modern life.
But the problem comes from your expectations for him not aligning with your boundaries for yourself. He's not allowed to have any expectations for you, but you've got expectations for him.
You expect him to give up any female friends, but if he asks you to give up your male friends, that's toxic insecurity. You expect him to stop going out to the bar with the boys, but you still want to go to the club with the girls. You expect him to stop spend hours playing videogames with the boys, but you'll still spend hours gossipping at the mall with the girls. You resent him if he spends too much time working and not enough time with you, but it would be misogynist and oppressive of him to ever feel the same way, and you would never hinder your career to maintain your relationship with him. You expect him to suffer through any verbal and emotional abuse from you and apologize to you anyway, for the sake of maintaining the relationship, but you would never let him treat you the same way, and you won't even apologize for how you treat him. You're expecting him to commit his life to you, but you're not committing your life to him.
And that's why you'll always end up with players, liars, manipulators, cheaters, or, if you're lucky, just a weak simp that genuinely loves you. Because there are only two kinds of men that will pass your test. The ones that are lying and telling you whatever you want to hear, or the ones that are so desparate that they'll degrade themselves into a slave for you if it means you'll grace them with your presence in their life. But if you want a man who genuinely loves you AND is strong, confident, and has the courage to defend not just his boundaries from you, but your boundaries from other people, that man is going to require the same commitment, love, and respect, from you, that you require from him.
It's not an unreasonable request. It's just equal partnership.
You know how women are always talking about the kinds of guys that don't respect women and have unrealistic expectations for women, who shy away from women that are strong enough to resist their manipulation and preserve their own boundaries? Yeah, those guys suck, but there are women like that too, and if you're offended at anyone mentioning that this is a real issue, then you're probably one of them, because when somebody talks about how some men can be scumbags, I don't get offended and assume they're talking about me.
Like 1/4 of men are liars that will play you. Another 1/4 of men are weak, and will tell you what you want to hear, and they're not trying to lie, but they'll just let you down. And half of men will do their best if you'll just work with them. If every man you've ever dated has been a piece of crap, then you may want to consider the possibility that you're attracted to some toxic traits or your test filters out people that are too genuine to give you the unrealistic answers that you wanted.
Edit: 100 likes, only one laugh react, most of the women have understood, and women who've disagreed with me or had vastly different experiences, have constructively provided their perspectives without being destructive.
Then the guys come in, insulting the women who met us in the middle to have this conversation with us... Really, dudes? I've been writing comments like this for years. This is the most overwhelmingly positive and unifying response I've ever gotten. Every other comment about how men and women treat each other, has gotten overwhelmingly laugh and angry reacts, from mostly women, who weren't interested in hearing a man's perspective. Women are meeting us halfway today, and we're actually having this conversation. And you guys want to waste this opportunity, to stab them while they're open? The same way you're sick of them doing to men? Seriously? I'm over here dumping water out of the boat and pitchin it shut, and you guys are coming over and drilling holes in the hull like you think it's fun. How do you expect women to hear men, if every time they stop yelling and give you a listen, you just start yelling back? We have to end the cycle. We have to stop fighting and start talking and listening. Don't EVER make women regret listening. They won't give any man another chance to speak for years because of you, and you know I'm barely exaggerating.
Remember when you wanted peace? Remember when you wanted to be understood? Well, this was your shot. Come on, guys. Let's do better.
18:02 you could say they're... _unHinged..._
I'm sorry that's such a bad joke (╥﹏╥)
I consider myself insanely lucky since I found the love of my life in my own friendship group and had no dating experience before him, but there were loads of other people in our friendship group who had experience with dating apps (my boyfriend included). Almost all of us were queer or questioning at the time so I guess it checks out, but it's kinda worrying how so many of them had stories similar to yours. Some of them even found people who they were happy to be with long-term, but over time the relationships deteriorated and ended. It seemed like the algorithms were fine-tuned to pair you with people who weren't good for you but would seem perfect at the start. It really sucks.
The book The Dating App Confessions by Logan Tindell had some interesting stories about the apps.
I've tried a few apps 2 or 3 times and never had any luck. Granted I've never played their game of shelling out my cash for a chance at romance.
"I know what i want". A new partner is surpose to surprise, you, you learn that you like something about them that you didnt originally know you did.
I can't speak as a woman cause I'm a dude so we don't get so many matches but I think if you only go for that top % of guys you find attractive, like most women are doing, then they're also being flooded with matches leading to ghosting and all that. Top that off with them having such a wide selection that they also get burned out on choice and overwhelmed. Plus given they get so many matches they aren't going to be looking to have interesting conversations since they know it's not necessary because they have 100s of other matches to go through.
Same thing happens when I get matches with beautiful ladies. They have so many matches they don't care to make small talk, one word replies or no replies at all because they know they don't need to reply. Gotta change up your dating pool I think, maybe all of us do.
I once heard someone say that if you’re using a dating app, you’re already scraping the bottom of the barrel so the people who say I want “this that and this” are never gonna find someone because those people that are “this that and this” would not need to use dating apps. Do you agree with this? I’m purely curious about what other people think of this statement.
When I was in my 20s around 2016 😊to 2018 I was on dating apps, I had a date like almost every week it was lit. But every year after that it got worse. Not sure what happened, maybe when I wasn’t looking for anything serious the universe sent me a lot of men. 👀😮💨
2:53 okay but how/why were you banned
Dating apps suck because it’s an inauthentic place to meet someone. Most of the drama with relationships comes from trying to use dating apps. Meeting someone in person, in real life, takes away a whole level of unnecessary drama that dating apps can create. Apps in general can destroy connections. In person is where you should connect with someone the best.
I feel you…still single and been trying…I think I’m just going to move into the woods
I’m glad I avoided casual ‘relations’, hookup culture behavior, dating apps, and hot girl summer BS my whole life.
Found my now-husband irl… outside..in the morning…in a cute way… it’s like I’m living in 00s romcom lol😂
the irony in this video. She talks about how delusional womens expectations, meanwhile shes wanting to get on the "rich &famous dating app" as a legit 4/10
I love that it was a bumble ad on this video 😂
Men and women both hate dating apps. But for different reasons......
As a man I will say I have the same issue that most other men have in dating. It's so hard to find women that are looking for something serious. Dating apps seem so barren and finding a woman looking for something long-term seems impossible.
as a queer transfemme, I'm somehow finding Grindr the least offensive app to use... make it make sense
Modern dating sucks people don't want to be friendly
Honestly, I think dating apps are valid, IF you learn how to make the most out of them.
First you gotta have standards and stick to them. Also, dont fall for the trap of seeking validation by liking a bunch of people just to get matches that you have no intention of pursuing. Pretty soon you will have a bunch of prospects that are unfiltered and you will have no patience to do the filtering.
Second, make sure to portray yourself as honestly as possible in your bio. What you like, the pics you like best, what you are looking for… If you put the bare minimum effort on your profile you will probably attract the bare minimum effort guys who swiped on you solely for your looks and when trying to talk to them you will either find out you have nothing in commo, or one of you too will get bored soon and stop responding
And finally, DO NOT rely solely on dating apps to meet people. Have hobbies and social groups that you can run to once the apps become too toxic and you feel burned out from them.
I like to take a break from them once I feel I have been spending too much time doing the swiping but not enough time responding to the people I have matched with. Thats when I know the purpose has been lost and I need to refresh and recenter.
The reason i ditched the dating app is because engineering the first meet IRL is a conundrum in of itself. Most women on a dating app want to meet out in public, and expect the guy to buy them dinner and/or drinks. Right off the bat, the relationship is doomed because the girl does not trust the guy, and the girl wants to be reimbursed monetarily for her time meeting with the guy. The guy from the get go is fighting an uphill battle to get the woman's trust and approval. Complying with the woman's terms simply makes the man look weak and makes him look like a manipulative nice guy.
There's this one dating app made for queer folks (or marketed to us anyway) that was pretty good at first. A bunch of features for free, you could even get into these bigass groupchats, see the profile of people who liked you, all that stuff that's standard for membership on other apps
Fast forward less than a year? And it's just terrible. Everything gone. Groups got nuked, every decent feature behind a paywall. Out of the thousands and thousands of swipes, maybe a hundred matches at absolute most? And with those, maybe a quarter replied to a message. Could count on one hand the people I've had a chat (more than one message either way) with. Three single dates that didn't go anywhere, one extremely fleeting relationship.
Worth it? Gotta say, not really. Maybe one or two good times were had with a single person. I don't think it makes up for the anxiety these shits put on you.
I live in a smallish town and don't drink, so I really don't know where to go to meet people. I already have a hard time with relationships but yeah the dating apps are nightmares. I honestly don't know why I'm still on there.
After watching this, the reasons you’re single are clear.
you know I am so glad you got the point of the video 🫶
I just quit it’s a big waste of time
If these apps are supposed to be for legitimate relationships and not just hookups then you should be able to report someone for messaging you just trying to get laid and talk about your body and what they want to do to you. You can't, because it's the point. The women are the product they are selling to men.
I got two ads for dating apps before this video started 🙄
Good vid! Also now I'll just keep blaming bad algorythm for when I dont get matches
Turkey mentioned! 🇹🇷🇹🇷🇹🇷
Wasn’t expecting to hear Turkey in here tbh 😂
lol i met my wife on tinder but they were like 1 of maybe 10 ppl that i matched with and actually talked to i got so little interest on tinder generally. we've been together 2.5 years (yeah yeah joke about lesbians moving too fast)
how does it feel to be living my DREAM
I use bumble friends and had way more luck than dating
I’m banned on tinder too lmao. How did you still make another profile??
New phone or email
Waaaay too much racial fetishization!! Good LAWD!!
Is decision fatigue the same thing as paradox of choice?
they more or so can go together like a person who is experiencing decision fatigue also can experience the paradox of choice!
I wish I could find someone in person but I don’t leave my house. It’s hopeless. I go to college but no one interacts. Attractive guys don’t approach me. I’m all alone.
I found the night mare of my life on some dating app 😢
It’s capitalism babes
i related to this too much
Your beautiful its the algorithms, the way they have been engineered. As a biracial/ mixed raced person in the UK. I have the same thing of being fetishsed and rude messages from men. Sometimes lods of messages then........Tumble Weed..... What I can say is ultimately it's about money making it doesn't pay to give everybody a perfect match, believe me they have got the technology to do so! So they make it this way......
Not to be rude but the unattractive girls on tinder are usually the only ones who experience the rude people on tinder because they are seen as “easy” because they are undesirable
You dont have to be stunnin Zahariya, yer already really pretty☺️😁, im also single, and live in Georgia to😄
men's obsession with mentioning race as if its a compliment is baffling to me. whats wrong with just saying "youre pretty" or "i like your eyes" or whatever, why do they have to make it weird
I usually say that to women, and I get no response back. Then, when i match, they don't say anything. What's the point of matching with me if you're not going to say anything?
You lost me when you name dropped hasan…mans is NOT cute and he is not as liberal as people make him out to be. He def a grifter
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
Why are gen zers and millennials afraid of going out on the town to meet people to date? Like every other generation? It's simple and just talk to people
I’m very Apolitical and live in Cali’s Bay Area. A lot of the people who try matching with me are basically communists and I’m not into cults of any sort so it’s gg for me as long as I stay here
its not the apps, its you. Your ego is bigger than your smv. what you should learn from your experience is your dating men out of your league. Learn the difference between sexual attention and relationship attention. in those guys eyes you are the broke dude.
Oh cut that Redpill "SMV" crap, dating sucks for many people regardless of looks.
@@Sasha-zl1xr no you cut that pink pill crap out.....women have made the dating market crap. And that's why ladies like you will continue to struggle....Good luck 👍🏾🤣
Try a man for a week
Those tattoos aren’t pretty
Generation X. Do women not just ask men out now ? Women have asked me out all through my life in person wherever we happen to be and i said yes about half the time so what's the problem. Maybe don't think too much? Just saying 😁👍
Are you dumb? Whole video explained the problem. You have to think, it’s to much going on in the world to not think about who you date or interact with.
Thought she's talking about app dating what I'm saying is people just walk up and ask each other out also the world is no more dangerous or messed up than it's ever been these days are no more significant than any other
F.D Signifier sent me here.
Also I never used a dating app. Checkmate atheists.
I actually matched with a celebrity on Bumble once & I live in Mississippi, his parents just happened to live near by and he was down here during the first wave of Covid in NY. He turned out to be a total sociopath tho so that was a total bust. Interesting experience though.
Was probably just looking for easy hookups
😳 my nosey ass... who was it? And also, glad you're safe. Dating apps can be scary.
now u KNOW u gotta spill who it was right.....
I always said, there are only a finite amount of single people in an area. The great ones are in a relationship, the good ones are enjoying being single, or stay in bad relationships, and the bad ones are on tinder. I will say I found all my partners on dating apps.. so they do work. It just takes time to find that needle in a haystack.
Tinder really is the "hookup" app. I think people would have a better shot using stuff like meetup and finding people through mutual interests instead of looking for dating as the main goal.
Totally disagree with the “great ones” being in a relationship. There are so many married people who get married for the wrong reasons and they are miserable. In today’s dating world, the god ones have opted out of dating or are hesitant because they see what the current dating climate is like. So many men and women get married because they think they have to for different reasons, and that’s why the divorce rate is so high, so no the “great ones” are not already married.
You were just lucky. That's it
I found my fiance on a dating app and so did my sister. ❤
Will it last? Come back in 5-7 years.
"Plenty of Fish just feels so millenial to me"
Damn, just put us in the ground like that 😅💀
millenials are actually in my dating pool lol i meant like 35+ year olds
@@ZhariyaAleice Dating older males is a great way to have a bad experience. Stick with your age group for your own benefit.
@@NovaPrincessplease explain.
Dating apps are annoying idk how you or anyone has the energy to talk to ten people 💀
Seem like they suck since no courting or etiquette is required. That mixed with them not being 'dating' apps but them being 'pre-sex mutually attractive matching' apps. With that in mind, they seem spot on.
Real talk
Spot on! never heard it put that way
They've always been trash. You just matured.
tbh probably 😭 my frontal lobe is slowly developing
No they've definitely gotten worse
I remember I got banned from Tinder for making a bad joke after some man insulted me. He basically messaged me the first message asking for sex. I was mad but I was like” are you paying for it?😒” then my account was closed lol idk if he reported me or the app thought I was a prostitute 🙃 that wasn’t fair because him asking for sex immediately was disrespectful.
Dating is so bad these days
First, everything in this video was so true. When me and my friends using dating apps turned 18, the amount of people who were in their late twenties swiping right on us was ASTOUNDING. I gave up after I saw someone’s age in my beeline go from 26 to 27. I felt bad because she seemed nice, but the age difference was too much.
Some dating apps even show you people outside of your own age range for some reason. I'm 30 and when I do use dating apps, I set the age to 25 and up, but somehow I still encounter people way younger than that. Obviously I always swipe left on them but it's really fucking weird and it encourages predatory behaviour. Just zero regards to the safety of young adults.
@@jackriver8385yep. On most dating apps preferences are only suggestions to the algorithm; the apps value your engagement (and if you’re male presenting, your money) more than anything.
If they run out of people they show you ones outside of your selections.
shocking news: men like younger women
Found this from FD, thanks for sharing this perspective I definitely resonate ☺
As young black male who believes to be born in the wrong generation at times, I gave up on dating apps about a year ago. I’ve tried a few, but never keep the app for longer than two weeks, due to the depression that I feel from using them. The lack of authentic connection, whether it be bots, SWs or US talking to each other through a screen, or simply the degenerative direction(s) in which the world has taken to get here (and some are okay with it).
I highly disagree with this dating approach and believe we should all meet each other in person.
Well said I know dating apps made bank when covid hit
Totally agree .
First of all, great to see you back posting.
As someone who was working through study I just never dated until now I'm in my mid 20s, and I have 0 idea how I am supposed to start. Dating apps seem absolutely terrifying.
I am working on trying to work on getting out in the world and meeting someone there. Not at a bar. I have two options rn: libraries/bookstores and the rollerskating rink. I'm pretty introverted too and I'm really only doing it to observe and see if I can watch people from afar. Another good option is volunteering somewhere. It's not work and us more empathetic folk will probably meet someone like minded there because, with for no pay lol. My advice, from a born introvert turned ambivert, get outside to your hobbies. Even walking the same trail every week might help you meet someone. Its all about hobbies in my opinion lol.
33 years old, never been on a dating app, never will, lmao. Never been on a date either, perhaps I'm asexual or something.
Once hinge found out my type, they were never in my regular swipe feed 😭
same! i thought it was just me!
I met my girlfriend on Tinder, and we've been together for nearly a year. I feel extremely lucky to have matched with her, although it took months of using tinder before we crossed paths. I wouldn't want to repeat that experience honestly. it’s tedious
Lol hours and days? Doesn't sound too bad.
My female co-worker showed me some of the messages they get on OKC and it's wild what dudes will say. One guy was a methhead casually asking if she'd partake with him for like a date.
Oh nahhh 😭😭😭 I remember when I matched with a guy and we talked more and more so we decided to talk off the app and then first conversation off was him sending a noodle pic iykyk 💀 I should've known better lol
That was back when I was like 19-20 though and naive
the way that i am not even surprised lol
And they’d get responses before I would and I’m looking for real dates. Another reason why I gave up. Tired of the douche bags get dates and I can’t and there’s nothing wrong with me
I tried dating apps, and I go back to them every once in a while, but it's never been very fulfilling. Basically I either get ghosted after mentioning my kids, because people neglect to read my profile in which I say MULTIPLE TIMES that I am a single parent, or get bombarded with cishet men looking for an "experience" ...
I am a trans man, and I am not looking to be some straight guy's spicy toy. I'm also asexual, which, again, I mention in my profile that is there for a reason but never gets read.
Basically, if your existence is a 🌽 category, you're not going to have a good time looking for genuine connection.
A corn category?
@@TheMysteryDrivercorn as in cornography.
is everything almost a corn category, I think it’s more to do with fetishism and viewing ppl as more than a tool to get off to
I’m a trans woman and most men just want to experiment with me and I feel like an alien sometimes. It’s crazy
I've tried a few dating apps and as a non binary autistic black person its been a difficult journey that I have absolutely given up on
Solidarity from one Autistic nb to another in our toils for wanting to find love while committing tge grievous sin of being ourselves.
no wonder you're non binary
Honestly, dating apps are just awful. As a dude, I constantly have to put on this clown suit to seem mildly interesting, all while trying to still stay as myself. Then getting one worded responses really makes me want to put a grenade in my mouth and pull the pin. Personally, I've been ghosted a lot, and I have grown kinda num to it all.
29:40 omg I hate how they open with that stuff.
Yes I'm into it. No I do not want to discuss it before I even know what your hobbies are.
I think more people should stop looking to "date" whatever that even means nowadays and just focus on connecting with other ppl. Build community, work towards shared goals, that's where the fulfillment is imo. Love usually finds you when you are in your element. Also please go outside lol.
I’m still stuck on Desantis banning AP psychology, like…huh???
pure lunacy
It's not him, you have to look at the people that vote for him. When he's gone, they'll find another idiot to replace him. You have to figure out how to protect yourselves from their idiocy.
It's because the College Board refused to have a Florida version of AP Psychology that didn't mention LGBT people.
Textbook companies used to sell versions for the South that cut out any mention of evolution or said that slavery was good, actually. They are businesses and they'll cater to any nonsense that sells.
At least the College Board didn't fold.
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**falls asleep**
I am a trans lesbian and I have had such a rough time on dating apps. I have to either deny myself my identity as a woman or I have to risk being kicked off of apps because I don't pass and I get spam reported.
that is definitely something that all dating apps should accommodate! the one thing I like about hinge is that there are so many distinctions on gender but it is frustrating i bet!
@@ZhariyaAleice alas I never got any matches on hinge