Story 3 : The mother also gets an a-hole score. She only took Sam to get icecream out of pure favoritism. I mean the dad could have taken Emma, but it isnt clear if the family owns more than one car, so I give him the benefit of the doubt.
I agree. At least OP has Emma’s back. And honestly Emma’s classes better prepare her for college. Sam can boast about her As from her general classes but college will give her a rude awakening.
There's an update where the mom acknowledged that she messed up because after the ice cream, she got the full story from the girl. Op and wife are currently trying to figure out how to deal with this.
I wish I had the same! My walls in my office are covered in art, enamel pins, and plushies! OP should break it off with her if he thinks having a hobby is juvenile. Also, this is HER house so what the heck is on about???
ngl I would be a bit scared of the bugs (I have really severe arachnophobia) but the only thing I would do if I were a guest is let the host (the person that invited me if they are not the one that owns the place) know about the phobia privately and leave it at that, maybe avoid that area of their home. I would not expect someone to change their home decor to cater to me though (Though, if they decided to remove the tarantulas when I was in attendance I would bake them a cake xD )
I know, right?! This dude got a 10/10 girlfriend and he's being ungrateful. I'm not interested in dating anyone and even *i'm* jealous at the absolute catch this guy landed.
Story 3: EMMA’S TAKING COLLEGE LEVEL COURSES!!!!! Bs and Cs ARE As in comparison to high school!!! Sam needed that reality check, and the Mom needs a favoritism check. No wonder the punishments never work!
There was an update that the mother misunderstood the situation. I guess she walked in on Sam crying that what had happened and I guess made something up for Emma.
I once took a class in college that had so many high schoolers in there that I didn't realize they were high schoolers and then ended up making a girl cry once I realized I couldn't actually date her. What made that situation more sucky was that she had the personality that makes me want to try extra hard not to make her cry. TL:DR took a college class with like 75% high schoolers in it.
I don't know how it is in the US, but when I was doing university essays in the UK, anything over 70 out of 100 was an A (or technically a "First", but y'know what I mean). For context though, anything over a 90 was the Professor basically saying "This is better than I could have done".
The boyfriend in the 4th story doesn't seem to understand that it is, in fact, mature to confidently express yourself and like what you like without being shamed by boring people.
To be frank, I'd only have a problem with the tarantulas, being arachnophobic - I wouldn't spend time in that room, no way no how. I don't care it's dead. On the other hand, I'm a figure collector, so I have my own "autism", to quote the mother.
What I find funny is that she has her own place, which is one of the most mature things you can do. It's her space that she finances and decorates as she likes. Pretty silly to take that as immature just because her tastes differ.
Exactly, i own a couple of pokemon plushies and have them littered around. Because- i like pokemon lmao. So why wouldn't i wanna decorate my personal space with them
"Idk where my daughter is getting this behavior from!" "Both sets of grandparents think Im being too harsh" I think thats the connection, OP. Cut off the grandparents til they agree to back you up in raising this young lady. You only have 2 more years to sort this ish out, everyone needs to get on board
Yup. That entitlement didn’t just appear on its own. Frankly, the fact that the Dad is even questioning it says that he has probably caved many, many times before. The fact that the other girl has drifted away from the group says a lot, too. She’s found out someone else who can be a real friend, not this horrible entitled brat.
I wish rSlash pointed that bit out because when hearing that, it really seems like OP's mother is one of those people who hate people with autism while the coworkers are also under that level. Like, if I was OP and had friends and parents who get freaked out by this, I would've actually cut contact with all of them. It's very clear that OP has a friend problem, but he refuses to see it and instead thinks that his girlfriend's room is the real problem just to keep up with his friendships and family's good terms. Serious, it's like the Pokemon GF story all over again.
@@digitaldritten Yes, it was. It was about OP dating a girl obsessed with Pokemon and his friends were making fun of him for it, making him believe that she's the problem. But then in an update, he mentions that the comments made him realize that it's not his girlfriend that's the problem, his friends are the real problem and after ending his friendship with those guys and apologized to his girlfriend, she helped him get into Pokemon.
If you see someone getting bullied they're probably the cooler person of the two. Was going to say something about autism but it works for people who aren't autistic as well.
That guy complaining about "childish" decor: you know what else is childish? Being judgemental of a person's interests and decor. He'd hate my place; it's horse themed. Lol
And I have movie posters all over the place, my game room has D&D maps and my office is 80’s themed. If this is such a problem for him, he shouldn’t be with her
It's almost like the only thing a bond is worth for is whenever or not the gift they bring is nice instead of of it being based on the fact that they put a lot of thought behind it, even with the situration she was in. This straight up reminds me of the story about how OP got insulted by a mother all because her wedding ring was a plain silver ring and said that if her husband got her a ring like that, she'd throw him out and was teaching her daughter to be that snobby. Or even the story about OP's husband baking a cake because they were so low on money and she was pushing him down because it's not as tasty as the cakes from restaurants or bakeries and she'd much rather have a cake from those places. Like, it sucks that these people play down these people thinking of them just because the gift is not good enough for them.
Yeah...that one really struck me as bizarre and absurd, possibly a freudian slip from the daughter's part. The friend bought the gift at the thrift store, how the hell does that make her a gold digger? Even as a petty and spiteful insult that doesn't make sense.
For my son's 12th birthday he wanted to invite everyone in his class but one kid. This kid wasn't a bully or anything, just on the autistic spectrum and weird. We told him that either he invites a few close friends, or everyone and that he couldn't leave just one kid out. The kid's older sister even offered to come with him. My son didn't budge...so we had cake a presents at home, but he didn't get a party. Today my son and that kid are friends and co workers.
I have autism. and in elementary school and middle school, I never got invited to parties. Because I was the "class weirdo" (and because I liked girls and I'm a female) and I've met other people and kids with autism. And they are just people who want to socialize and have fun. We are all human beings. It's no fair to assume someone is weird without giving them a chance.
May I say you are amazing for doing that. My daughter was always the one who was the only one in the class not invited to parties and she is the only kid I know who invited every child in the class and have no one turn up at her party. The reason my daughter is deaf and has mild learning difficulties she had friends right up until she got her hearing aids and then everyone treated her differently. The mother of her best friend came to me and said you must stop your child playing with mine because I can't have my child playing with a child like that. I pointed out she was fine with it for the past 3 years so why she said if she knew she was deaf she would have never allowed it. I will point out it was mainly the parents I was told we should take her to a special school to be with her own kind, kids like her should be locked up and hidden are just a few things said to me. She eventually made a couple od friends and they did a suprise 16th for her and she cried as it was the first party someone came to she was so happy. I hated seeing the way she was treated all because she got hearing aids. Her parties were days out with our adult friends who she loved and she enjoyed them but she missed out on so much when sh3 was little. Things changed when she went to college and now she has many friends but it got to the point when she hated birthdays when she was little. So seeing your comment makes me smile you are amazing 😊
@@rjlangaman4741 Not that year. He thought we would cave but we stuck to our guns. During the years we had parties where he took a few friends to escape rooms, lazer tag and stuff like that.
The fact that both sets are on her side has me wondering if they've always been in competition with her for her affections, and therefore helped create a brat
I never had an elaborate birthday party with all of my friends.. the most I ever got was cake and family members rarely any gifts at all. You know when I got my first party? when I paid for it.... she is entitled because they give her everything (clutches pearls) Oh my, her friend is getting a sweet sixteen party, how would it look if our daughter didn't also get one... Seriously the grandparents... sure, but also the parents.
Last story: NTA what is wrong with this kid? She doesn't deserve a party acting like this. How is OP ruining her social life when it is clear to me she is doing a good job of doing that herself?
Hey, as a writer on the visual novel story: it always hurts when you work so hard for so incredibly long on a piece, especially across YEARS, and you show it to someone and they don't like it. But OP did one thing right from the very start: he told is girlfriend up front, multiple times, that he was categorically uninterested in the medium, meaning he was NEVER going to enjoy her work. She could have written the next game of the year and he still wouldn't enjoy it because he doesn't enjoy the medium. It's not a personal fault to not enjoy every medium or every genre; it's a form of self-recognition. As for posting something to Reddit, a textual medium? Of course he expects people to read his post. He posted something to a text-based site, what else are you gonna do, turn it into a collage? But the thing is, he probably isn't forcing anyone to come and look at his post specifically. Just like you don't go to Steam if you don't want to play a game or to RUclips if you don't want to put on a video, you don't go to AITA if you don't want to read posts. Am I giving this more thought and sympathy than I maybe should? Probably. He does come off as a selfish bundle of inconsistent internal narratives. It wouldn't surprise me if it really is as simple as "he's too self-absorbed to do something to validate his incredibly talented partner because it's not fun for him". But sometimes, there's some factor you just can't get past, not because the rest of the product isn't worth it, but because of how much you dislike that one factor. For him, it seems to be reading.
Honistly VN games are fucken amazing and fun when done well but its perfectly understandable that op doesnt like that kind of game its the same idea if his girlfriend made a shooter game, and he hated shooters, at least against his own intrist after telling her he didnt like that style of game many times he tried it for a fair amount of time for not liking that style and told her what he thought thats going far beyond whats owed here
Yeah I'm agreeing with you on this one I thought that R slash was wrong. It is okay for your partner to have a hobby that you're not into and that you don't even want to get into. There are ways to show your partner that you support her hobbies without being into them. I also get that the girlfriend would be sad because she wants to show off this thing she did and her partner's not interested and It sucks but she shouldn't try shoving it down his throat.
Yep, this is one of the few times where I don't agree with Rslash. The man is setting boundaries and his girlfriend is basically trying to trespass. That's a sign of a narcissistic person and her reaction to his PREEMPTIVE and MOTIVATED refusal is another one. He even made an effort for her and it still wasn't enough in her eyes. I'm not saying they should break up or anything but hot damn leave the man alone if he doesn't like to read, it doesn't mean he doesn't love you or support you.
For Story 2, I think a major factor that was left out is the length of the game/visual-novel. If it’s on the shorter side, then he might as well finish it. However, there are plenty of text-games/visual novels that would take hours to finish, let alone navigate through multiple endings. If she put years into making it, then her’s might be on the longer side. If that’s the case, then him playing long enough to sample the game is more reasonable than forcing him to actually finish it. Especially if reading isn’t his strong-suite.
Yeah I don't understand why some people are like this. I feel like the bf need to break up, that's a very toxic relationship. You can't expect someone to love something just because you are the one makes them.
Idk man. I'm a writer, not a visual novelist just regular stories, and my partner doesn't like reading but he'll still read anything I write even when I don't ask no matter the length. He's also a very slow reader so even a 90 page novela would take him up to a week to finish. He still does it because he knows I work hard on my stories but am too shy/self conscious to share them with many people and wants me to feel good about my hobby. Replace this with video games: if a dude spent weeks or months building a world in Minecraft and finally finished it and wanted to show his girlfriend but after 10 minutes of looking and explaining things she just goes "I'm not really interested in this sorta stuff" and walks off. Would that not be seen as rude and disrespectful towards your partner?
Last story: you don't "ruin the daughter's social life" by not throwing her party, you''ll ruin her social life if you _do_ throw her a party. She's already lost a friend due to being nasty and entitled, and she'll continue losing friends, if she doesn't grow out of being a brat.
She’s ruining her own social life. She lost the insulted friend, and others at the party didn’t like her attitude towards thrifted or less expensive gifts. If she keeps that up all her friends will drift away
Story 3: Sam's not the only one that needs a reality check, mom could use one herself. You didn't set your daughter on fire you made her put her money where her mouth was. And where'd the other daughter's ice cream after being made fun of by her sister for not having straight A's?
Actually, there were updates to that story. rSlash sorta mis-spoke. It was SAM who told the mother what happened. The kid gave her mother a sob-story, twisting what happened to make herself an innocent victim. OP had a talk with his wife afterward and having heard the REAL story, she agreed with the OP and apologized for siding with Sam and raging at the OP.
@@Eppon6 great, except one more thing needs to happen. Sam should be punished for lying to her mother about what happened and for bullying her sister, because pending your parents against each other so one would baby you is a big no.
last story: "the girl is no longer her friend anyway" - this arguement would have been a reason for me to be even harsher, because not only is she refusing to apologize for her entitlement from the previous year, but now she also is also saying that only her friends are worth apologizing to.
Yeah, this part seems like the daughter is like "Well, this person I was mean to because she didn't get what I want from me is no longer my friend. Good, because this is a great excuse for me say that I don't have to apologize".
Test story: the mother is an AH too. Like she is enabling the daughter’s bad attitude by undermining the father’s right to give her the needed dose of reality she needed by taking only her, and not the other daughter who was bullied by her enabled know-it-all bratty bully of a sister. You know who the golden child is for the mother dearest.
Yeah, as soon as I heard the mother's reaction I thought, "Well, it's no wonder Sam would always go back to making fun of Emma, the mother's enabling her behind the husband's back."
Facts. If I’m dating someone and my Interests scare them because I’m comfortable to decorate my house with them it’s not going to work out in the long run. I’m not going to fake who I am, and with his mom’s comment is she going to start asking her son to “Get her to start acting like an adult, and not a child” or see about not bringing her to family gatherings
@@anonymouslyopinionated656 There's a difference between "I don't like your decor" and "You're childish for liking that decor". One is an opinion, the other is a judgement.
Story 4: Why are you with someone who has passions you so clearly hate? What were you expecting to happen if you ever moved in together? For her to give up everything she loves and never speak of them again because God forbid you have to deal with things you aren't personally interested in?
This is common for controlling people, who get someone and hoping that they can reshape them into being their ideal spouse instead of going thought the time and hard work of finding the exact person they want.
Story 2: as someone who plays visual novels, forcing someone to read one, even a short one, is not it. I looked at the original post and most people there probably never played a visual novel. I love playing them but if I stop enjoying one I just drop it, it's not a genre you can just pick up if you don't enjoy it Not to mention, everyone is bashing the "blackmail" part but like, this IS kind of emotional blackmail, "I'm your gf so play this thing you don't enjoy or I'll ignore you" People making a lot of analogies but I feel like this is more like you gf cooking something with a flavor you REALLY don't like no matter how well made it is and then when you take a few bites and tell her you don't like that flavor she still insists you eat it Yeah sometimes you do thing you dont like for your partner but why is it only being expected of the bf? Most people are saying they'd do it for their gf but that is your *choice*, not them demanding you do it If doing thing you don't enjoy bc of a relation turns into an obligation instead of a choice then that relation might be doomed
He supported her by playing for 15 minutes. As someone who likes stories in games but hates visual novels, I can agree with op. I’d get hella bored and quit after a few minutes no matter how good the game is. AND I LIKE READING ACTUAL BOOKS! It’s not everyone’s cup of tea and the gf IS emotionally blackmailing him and she IS being childish. He’s not her editor or publisher and shouldn’t have to do more than take a look at it and support her in her journey.
I was looking for a comment like this! I've never heard of visual novels, tbh, but I compared it to one of my best friends. I write, I want to be a full time author one day, and I asked one of my best friends if he'd read something I wrote and critique it. He asked what genre it was, and I told him YA, kind of problem novel-ish. And he straight up said that he was probably the worst person to critique that style of novel, because it's not a category he's interested in, so if he ever got around to reading it at all, his comments wouldn't be very helpful. Did that hurt? Yes. Did I try a bit to convince him otherwise? Yes. But ultimately, I accepted it, because that's what people who care about each other are supposed to do.
The bugs and absolutely terrifying ocean creatures would probably scare the piss out of me half the time but she sounds like an interesting person with such unique decor tbh
Story two: OP was in a no win situation. A visual novel is a hell of a lot more than a two hour time investment. I sympathize with the guy I'm not much of a reader either. That said even if he did get through the whole thing there is no way he could give her constructive criticism and walk away unscathed, and if he told her it was great she probably wouldn't believe him. The only thing OP is TBH for is not finding a more diplomatic way of saying "no".
The game story is more nuanced than that. She's making a game for a very specific demographic and expecting a full test and review from someone NOT IN that demographic! I like visual novels, my friend Mat does not. His girlfriend developed a VN but she didn't ask him to test it cuz he doesn't like VNs! Her team tasked an ACTUAL VN player to test it! Additionally, my fiance is a webcomic artist. I edit one of her projects and am that projects #1 fan, but she's developing another project I don't care much for so she asks a friend who DOES like it. It's called knowing your audience. The girlfriend's project will never succeed if she tries forcing it outside of the target audience!
Fact of the matter, this is not a relationship issue, this is a developer's issue. business, if you will. I'm a self published author. Why would I ask someone who likes comedy films to read my murder mystery novel?
I was thinking hte same. It is much more than a 2 hour time commitment if she is expecting a full review (from someone who doesn't like and is unfamiliar with VNs). Also I read the comments on the original and Almost all of them are hung up on OP not knowing what blackmail is, but in my opinion what she is doing is emotioal blackmail (not talking to him at all if he doesn't play).
Story 4: his reasoning (coworker judging in his industry) was reasonable but his personal sentiments and wording make him the asshole for me. If what my coworkers think of me is such a make or break I would simply say “nothing personal, but they didn’t react so well last time so I’d rather use my place so people have less to say”
Yeah I was looking for a comment like this. Work gathering hosted by you are a very different thing from people visiting you in private. You should and definitely would, try to make as professional and 'clean' an appeal as possible. This isn't about personal flavour, your hobbies or such. It's a work gathering. I just would've hosted it elsewhere tbh, always, not just in this case. Because I also like to have my peculiar decor in my house. So my home isn't what I'd call a work gathering environment. It's not rude to say that. Private life and work isn't the same and usually better kept separate. Not the best phrasing on my end, sorry if it sounds a little odd. English isn't my mother tongue. I don't think OP is an AH for saying that to his GF, he's just an AH for wording it needlessly rude.
@@icecreamnoodles3742Yeah, I get that. He had someone react badly to the bugs and it’s common enough to be afraid of bugs so that wouldn’t bother me as such. His fault lies more in the fact that he’s clearly been judging her home and her interests as childish and acting as though he accepts her when he really doesn’t. People like that think they’re such saints for tolerating the “faults” in their partner, until something happens to break their silence and they show that they never really loved the other person… they just loved the bits they found acceptable and hoped the rest would go away in time.
Yeah, me and my s/o have "I love everything about you but let's tone it down so these pricks don't blow a gasket" moments all the time. Nobody's offended by it, we both fully understand the etiquette of being in the presence of "proper" people vs constant penis jokes in our own house. Meanwhile, the bf here just jumps straight to "you're childish and my mom thinks you're an autist lol." Like, really dude? If that's the way you tell your girlfriend you don't want her to host, supposedly because of your stuck-up coworkers, then that's a mighty fine Freudian slip about how you _actually_ feel about your gf.
Story 4: OP I'm 24 and have Funko pops on the wall right now, with a Hazbin hotel placemat on my desk for all to see. People display their interests and hobbies, and the reason you've never seen a place like your gf's before is because you have never been around people that share her interest. What you describe is actually very common. If you're this embarrassed by it then maybe you shouldn't be going out with her anymore, but until you get out of your boring bubble you have no right to shame her like this.
The home decor sounds awesome, and OP's circle sounds like a bunch of babies. Clearly the phrase "ugly people attract ugly people" is true. To be clear, I'm talking about emotionally ugly people. The finance sector tends to attract shallow people, and this is coming from someone whose mom worked in finance.
Story 3; NTA. As a college student, I can confirm that my classes are miles easier than they were in high school because my teachers have more time to spend going in depth on topics that're tricky and my classmates are very willing to share notes if I miss a class. There's just more support because the teachers have less students and the students are out of that 'I'm better than you so haha!' phase.
We see just how useless Rslash English degree is in story 2. OP wasn't into that sort of thing and the gf essentially nag him into doing something that he didn't wanna do, but becomes emotional when he doesn't care to finish it because he didn't want to do it in the first place. Yet everyone in the post is talking about "oh but we have to read your post" which wasn't the point. But in typical reddit and rslash fashion only do selective reading and missing the point. Sure it could be handled better, but forcing someone into things they don't wanna do from the start is also terrible.
And whatever happened to “No is a complete sentence”? While I don’t agree with OP not being supportive I don’t think the gf is in the clear either. When he said no she could’ve asked any gamer friends who like the genre or recruit a beta tester.
He has an english degree? With how often he just rewords how OP writes it, i would never think he has a degree in it. It alwaus annoys me how he just changes whar is written, if OP wanted it written like that, they would've written it like that
The girlfriend has a naturalist room with insect specimens? That's like an ideal room for me! Throw in some Edwardian furniture, dark bookcases and a cabinet of curiosities and I'd never leave!
yes, me too, i used to collect bugs specimens but my cats eats them so i can't have them, i used to have a rhino beetle specimen and a male praying mantis. and she have a vampire squid paint? ! that's just awesome ! i will love have stickers of those things and put it in the walls and my computer
I wish I had that kind of room, it sounds like heaven tho I can't have actual insects so I draw them on the walls along with other animals as a way of having them!
Yeah, if I found out someone didn’t want to use my home to entertain their friends because it had stuff like this, I’d congratulate myself for successfully deterring parasites and enjoy my well-appointed cave in peace. It sounds like a nice place except that the op apparently was okay with some of it… so clearly some portions might be a tad dull.
Im so confused on story 2? Visual Novel: - Lasts anywhere from 2-50+ hrs - 10k to 100k+ words? - Morality system? (Many different dialogue choices) - Multiple endings? - Unknown Genre (Drama? Horror? Romance? Pornographic?) - Required to finish it How is that at all equal to: Reddit post: - 2 paragraphs - You CHOSE to read it - r/slash is getting PAID to read it We dont have anywhere near enough information about the visual novel to be trashing the bf. R/slash and the top comment are just knee jerk arguements in bad faith.
6:49 Futurama pieces and “Weird triangle guy”? (Probably Bill Cypher) DUDE, CAN ME AND YOUR GF BE FRIENDS??? SHE SOUNDS COOL ASF. Once I get my own place thats EXACTLY how I want it to be decorated.
That last story is going for the long con! Good on the parents since it doesn't seem that the girl really hasn't changed. I can see her helping others and working in less privileged areas could be a substitute considering the friend may be unreachable, unlikely but possible. Although it would have the same outcome.
I was thinking that. Have her birthday party but do something cheap and any gifts she gets instantly get donated to someone else. Make her work in a food kitchen or something as well. Teach that girl that she should be grateful she has what she has.
For the guy in story 4, I could understand OP if he had just said he didnt wanna invite people over because people got scared last time (especially since she pressed him for an answer) but literally everything else he said just made him look worse and worse
Story 2: rSlash coming out with the bad takes once again, how is reading a Reddit post comparable to playing 100% of a VN? She didn’t ask him to play through the game once, she asked him about the different options, character paths, and endings. The average VN takes what, 10 hours to beat once, and depending how many endings there are she wants him to play through it all, that can be anything from 20+ hours to 60+ hours of playing a game in a genre you don’t care for, so even then his feedback won’t be worth anything because he isn’t the target audience, there are so many ways he can support her, share her game on VN forums and gaming pages, but telling me this man needs to sit through at minimum 10 hours of gameplay for a game he knows he won’t like and then comparing that to taking a minute to read a Reddit post, yeah ESH she shouldn’t ask someone who doesn’t like VNs to play a VN for player feedback and he should support her game in other ways
OP wasn't the AH in the slightest, he repeatedly made it clear he didn't like VNs and wouldn't be able to give good criticism, and it's clear he's supported her through the 2 years. The gf shouldn't be emotionally blackmailing him into reading her story, which he obviously wouldn't like.
the girlfriend with the decor sounds awesome. I think more people SHOULD decorate their homes with their interests! It's your home! Put stuff in it! Also want to give OP (and possibly his mom) an extra AH score for the "is she autistic" comment. Because it sounds like the boyfriend and his mom think of that as a negative thing. So what if she is autistic?
Because to them only autistic people can like good cartoons and tarantulas? Honestly, i think it's pretty cool. I'm afraid of spiders but a wall dedicated to beetles and bugs? Like the whole house sounds like art. i've never heard of something like this before but knowing its someone you love, wouldn't you support their interests? Hate saying it from one post, but whys she with him?
@@delagoence3739 yeah lol I definitely caught it. I'm autistic myself, so I'm unfortunately aware of such things. I don't blame RSlash for not catching it though. It's harder to notice when you're not often the victim of it
As a fellow game developer I can symathize with the girl in the second story. She’s passonate about the game and wants people to try it amd see what they think. But that doesn’t mean you should force others to play it, especially when they have said they aren’t interested in that type of game. That would mean bad feedback and them not goving the game a fair chance and could lead them to be bored, like what happened in this case. If she wants feedback then the best thing to do is to look elsewhere for feedback.
I agree. I like writing. I've written 2 short stories that I shared with my eldest brother because I know he likes to read the same genres as me. I didn't offer it to my other brother because though he likes that genre, it's more movie format over books. Yes, he'd read it cause he loves me, but he would probably be bored, and I wouldn't get the proper feedback on it that I'm looking for. People creating anything should look for their target audience. A baker wouldn't have a diabetic taste test, non sugar free cakes. They will ask someone who can eat it. People can be supportive without actually being a part of what you're doing.
@@QuayHollywoodI would say very wrong I’m not into visual novels either, but I have dabbled GF is essentially asking for OP to spend 20-30 or more hours on something he doesn’t enjoy How? It can easily take that long to get all the endings in a visual novel game. She’s looking for a free play tester, not just feedback
@dragonriderabens9761 oh I know that part. I'm saying that in the sense of just because they a person's SO people feel they HAVE to do something to support them, not just be a background chatacter.but again it's not very wrong its just people's bias
Story 2: I'm going to have to say NTA. OP's reasoning is understanding, and besides if the girlfriend wants a accurate response, then getting someone who doesn't like reading won't yield proper results. It's like if the girlfriend worked hard perfecting a dessert dish and asked OP to test it and give a honest opinion. Yet the dish has pineapple in it, and OP doesn't like pineapple. No allergy he just doesn't like the taste. How can he give an accurate opinion if he can taste the food item he doesn't like?
Story 2 : I do feel like I understand OP and his reasoning for not wanting to play, but at the same time I don't like the GF is someone who is looking for an accurate response. To me, it seems like the GF has confidence issues (as seen by her asking if it was boring) and just wanted OP to show some interest in something she likes doing. Finishing it does seem like WAY to long of a task for something OP isn't interested in however. Besides, we don't know if OP told her that she was talented and the actual game was great, for all we know OP could just tell her that they doesn't want to play their game because he's not interested and played for 15 minutes. Im going to say 1.5 outta 5 AH for expressing their disinterest in a passion of hers for OP and calling her childish for being upset, and 0.5 outta 5 for the GF for trying to get OP to commit to the whole game instead of a good chunk. They could have even maybe played it together to make it more interesting..
@@kagawrld9993u can't really call someone an asshole for not liking something when u do,for example my gf is heavy into minecraft and animal crossing while im heavy into king of fighters and zelda,my gf hates hard games and games that take a lot of practice and I don't care much for life simulators,so I wouldn't ask her to play a soulslike I'm making knowing she doesn't like it and vice versa,relationship or not u shouldn't seek valid feedback from someone who doesn't enjoy the genre or style of ur project
@@kidd9662 I get what you're saying, and I agree with you in the point you're making with your relationship. I wouldn't force someone to play a game like Minecraft whenever they're not into that. I do feel like, however, its a bit different for this relationship because she did make the game. It's just nice to feel like someone is interested in something you're so passionate about, and she seems to have some confidence problems. From my perspective, she's not looking for a professional opinion, she just wants validation. I'm going to have to agree to disagree with you because everyone views their relationship differently though. I do respect your opinion.
@@kagawrld9993 I mean yea wanting validation is understandable but if he doesn't wanna play the game he doesn't wanna play the game😂being upset is ok but u can't blame him for not putting a lot of effort into something he isn't interested in,he didn't even say It was bad he actually complemented it,it just wasn't for him
Story 2 with the genders reversed: "NTA. You clearly stated your boundaries: you don't care for graphic novels. You stated your support for your boyfriend, even looked at the first chapter. Your boyfriend is super toxic to demand you keep reading it." And the commenter you quoted would have a point if he had been forced by someone to read Reddit. You need to do better, Dabney.
If Rslash thinks you can get through a VN in two hours, then he's crazy. A decent VN can realistically take TEN TIMES as long as that to get through, especially if you aren't a big reader, and/or read slowly. He gave a go with reading her game, despite it not being a genre or medium that he enjoys, but expecting him to finish something like that is pretty unreasonable, especially given the time commitment.
@@lmaChroma ngl I’m not totally against OP in that story, he didn’t want to invite his coworkers over because they won’t be comfortable in a place with frame bugs on the walls. He said some questionable things, sure, he sees does things as childish but he still loves her and is tolerant that he can stay there without problems.
@@lmaChromaand be honest with yourself, you would love to have framed bugs in your house? The weird fish bathroom and artwork on the walls aren’t even that out if the ordinary. But the bugs? Reallyyy?
@@mrstar3218 But given how he actually feels about the decor he A. Might never move in because of how his job relies on appearances of the employee and home or B. Move in and control how the place is decorated which could cause a problem between them. Despite being in love or deeply caring about someone being incompatible in anyway might not make a relationship work long term.
@@mrstar3218 personally? I'd love it. Remember that there are people who pursue a career in biology just to specifically become entomologists. Bugs are fascinating little creatures and can be beautiful in their own weird ways
@@anonymouslyopinionated656 it's not that he doesn't like it, it's how he told her. He insulted her, called her immature, and basically agreed with his mom calling her autistic as an insult
Yeah, I don't think he understands how much can go into a visual novel, I played one and took me days (hour or two each day). So how can OP give an opinion on something that he's not into?
That whole thread was a shit show, my favorite comments were the ones calling him a hypocrite for not reading the novel but expecting Redditors to read his post, like bro, no one was forcing you to read it, you chose to read OP’s post. OP was being asked to not just read but provide analysis for the whole thing, including multiple ending and a whole bunch of stuff.
Thanks for staying true to your original self and not using AI to react to posts! You've inspired me to create my own reddit style videos and I wanted to say thank you. I'm also down to collab anytime! :)
Home decor story reminds me of that one Twitter post “People over 18 and still using umbrellas” The guy responds “What are we supposed to be waterproof once we are legal” Like am I supposed to have beige minimalistic house because im an adult? A house that has none of my personality whatsoever in it…??
Yep! 👍 I have a nice lithograph (it’s real art, not a reproduction) of a pretty woman in my dining room, and I put a pink mustache on her for fun! It’s made me giggle for years! I also have large sculptures of noses I made as a teen on a cabinet in my living room. I have a giant image of Our Lady of Guadalupe hanging above the medicine cabinet in our very small bathroom. It’s all for fun! Enjoyment!
Story 2: reading a short story is not the the same as visual novel. Speaking from experience, i love to write; it's genuinely for me to explore themes a characters, but i also find the task of reading laborious often( it's even a struggle to re read edit my own stuff). I would never subject others to read my stuff if they have no interest in it. You can't expect harry potter fan to enjoy the fault in our stars. You're just not seeking the right audience.
I’m exactly the same. Rslash was dead wrong on this one. I’m starting to question his logic because this is the second bad call he’s made in 2 AITA vids.
@grizzly_manbanimation8436 Yeah, he makes a lot of wrong calls (some ridiculously so). I'll respect his opinions, but I'll disagree and point out the flaws in them.
Im kinda surprised rslash didn't talk about the mother in the 3story Taking the the daughter out to ice cream, the mother is obviously encouraging this type of behavior from her rewarding her when she does something wrong.
Story 2: It’s not often I strongly disagree with rslash, but this is one case. As someone with adhd and a strong distaste for reading in general, it would drive me insane to finish a graphic novel to the end. My review would not be genuine to my SO.
The second story- I'd never force someone who clearly isn't interested in playing something that can be so long (Apparently it can be 20 hours for all endings in some games). I'd at least try to find someone that is interested.
My stepdaughter came stomping her way through the sitting room one evening...and crying. All I could get out of her was. 'I'm dumb, I'm thick and I'm stupid and I'm ugly. I was gobsmacked ! It turns out that it was her Father that said it...repeatedly. She was anything but that...she was a bright kid...very pretty as well. As far as I'm concerned ANYBODY who calls their own child that is the scum of the earth.
I think he's emotionally abusing her by breaking her self-esteem. Yeah, trying to powerplay by mentally breaking your own innocent kid is beyond just the "scum of the earth" territory
@@BadassHater1 there's a difference between 'breaking someone's confidence' and teaching someone humility. Arrogance isn't healthy. It'll lose you friendships, relationships, even jobs if you're too up your own. It's important to understand what other people go through and have some perspective. And heck, he didn't anywhere SAY that she was dumb. Merely that her sister was doing more advanced work, so a B or C isn't worse than her A. A parent should absolutely curb that "I'm a genius, I'm better than everyone else" attitude early. It's for her own good.
Agreed. Some parents are horrible bastards to their children, all the while forgetting it's the kids who decide what nursing homes they shove and forget them in.
"It's not something a grown women should have" Says who? Hm? Huh? How does being a adult all a sudden mean they can't express themselves or their hobbies in their OWN HOME. The only way I'll be able to express myself is when i get my own place because i can't do it in my parents home!
OP is probably one of those people who think, "Only kids are allowed to have fun." Which is a bunch of bullshit. Says her decor was "juvenile." Is just insulting.
Sixth story: NTA. I even had a record scratch here. She called that girl a golddigger, when she is the one demanding expensive gifts. Also, they will destroy her social life? Well, for how she manages it that won't be a great loss.
The home decor guy is the kind of person who thinks that all animated mediums are “childish” and therefore beneath him. Like does he think that being an adult mean that you can’t have fun?
I have to think Rslash is blind in story 2 and the top comment. The guy said he doesn’t enjoy visual novel games so why would the GF give it to him to test, that’s just bad feedback. He’s not selfish, it’s just not his thing and she knows that. But he still tried and when she asked the response wasn’t bad, he said he’s not saying it’s bad he just doesn’t like it because he’s not into that stuff. Like… did you even read the post?
And besides, Rslash's reasoning makes no sense. The OP didn't force anyone to read the post. It's generally expected that people who aren't interested in the post will just skip it. The girlfriend did make the OP spend hours reading her visual novel.
With that post, so many people focused on the not wanting to read part, even calling him illiterate and the fact he's just not interested in that genre of game.
Story 2: Uh... I would kinda be inclined more towards everyone sucks there. Let's first be clear that it's not a graphic novel, it's a VISUAL novel, which is a video game type. Those types of games are usually quite long and expansive, it's definitely more than a two hour commitment to get what she's asking. Second, we could flip this around and point out that OP set a boundary of 'I'm not into visual novels' and she pushed to ignore it. Third, like... you can be supportive of your loved one, but not share an interest, even if that interest is intersecting with work your loved one made. Plus if he doesn't like visual novels, then he doesn't play them, and if he doesn't play them, then he won't be able to provide any valuable feedback beyond what he gave from playing for fifteen minutes. Now I will admit the OP's post is a bit tantrum-y and over the top, and crying on reddit was unnecessary because it's such a minor issue. But at the same time, if he doesn't like those kinds of games, then he doesn't like those kinds of games. Don't push your partner to do things they don't want to do. Now I don't have any romantic partners, but I have my parents and sibling, and I love them all and we all have a close relationship, but I would never ever ever ever push them to read what I write or look at my drawings or sit and hear my fictional world's lore, because I know it's not something they're interested in. Meaning they couldn't give me a fun, passionate response, just standard "well done!" type stuff. And that all takes much less time than playing a video game. I think you all got completely hung up on his claim of not liking that much reading (and his attitude, but he could've been in a bad mood) and didn't bother to think about the situation in its entirety. Having said all this, OP could've offered alternative ways of supporting her, but she also needed to take no as 'no'. They could've gone out to dinner, he could've treated her, if she was REALLY deadset on him playing the thing then she could, I dunno, sit with him while he plays it? So they can have it be a fun time together instead of being a chore. I'd give maybe a soft 0.5 all around, and I don't hope she dumps him. I hope they both grow up a bit and try not to be so single-minded with each other, but that's about it. I don't think rSlash or comments giving the wrong analysis are really worthy of an asshole score here though. More of a 'stop and think for more than 5 seconds before reflexively responding to a specific portion of the thing instead of the whole situation' score.
GF’s response is emotional blackmail “You didn’t do what I wanted so I’m gonna ignore you” That’s blatant emotional blackmail, especially since she trampled all over OP’s clearly set boundaries then got mad when he doubled down on them He gave her an inch, and she tried to take a mile but he wasn’t having that so now he’s getting the cold shoulder for it Yes, there are other ways to be supportive but we don’t really have any info on what he did/didn’t try in that regard, so not gonna judge on that front due to a lack of info That said, she’s not asking for just feedback, she’s asking for a free play tester That is not a reasonable expectation, period
The only thing the boyfriend can be accused of is maybe insensitivity and calling his girlfriend out for being childish. Other than that he's completely in the right. Couples should support each other, but at the same time, respect each others' interest. The BF supported his GF by doing something, albeit briefly, he didn't enjoy and gave his feedback as requested. The GF did not respect the BF's interest by backing away and also emotionally blackmailed by ignoring. R slash honestly heavily favors women and children unless there are serious Karen vibes.
@@YuriKamado19 sorry i will do better next time to stop you from reading youtube comments that you are clearly not interested in scrolling down to review =(
Ok, I'm going to dissent on the guy who doesn't want to play the girlfriend's game. I write romance novels for a living. My husband is my BIGGEST supporter... but he doesn't read my books. He'll help me sort out some plot points, and he's helped me figure out some of the more complicated details for my suspense novels. He's a huge cheerleader for me. He literally brags to people about what I do and loves that I'm his sugar mama. He just... isn't interested in reading romance novels. And that's perfectly okay. I have beta readers and editors to give me feedback. All I want from my husband is his love and support. If you want feedback on a project, you need feedback from someone who's actually into what you created, not someone who's reading/playing it just because you guilted them into it. They're going to go into it with a bad taste in their mouth, they're not your target audience, and their feedback won't be all that useful. So... I disagree that the guy is a butthole here. People can be supportive of your art without actually consuming it, and badgering them into consuming it will just make them dislike it more. Also, reading a short Reddit post isn't quite the same investment of time/energy as reading an entire novel or playing an entire game. I'd be concerned if the guy was belittling her work or something. Choosing not to consume it just means they have different interests, and there's nothing wrong with that (presumably they have other common interests).
As I mentioned in a response below, if my husband has spent ages perfecting a seafood recipe, he won't get upset if I don't eat it. He knows seafood isn't my thing. No matter how proud he is of the recipe, no matter how much work he puts into it, I'm just... never going to enjoy something with fish in it. And guess what? He's 100% okay with that because he respects my likes and dislikes. And I can still be happy for him that he perfected the recipe even if I don't eat it myself! It's not rocket science, folks.
I definitely agree with not hosting a business meeting if the things like tarantulas and gonlin sharks were in areas everyone would go to but insulting her for decorating like that is just so unnecessarily rude
Thank you I’m glad someone agrees. It’s not as if he’s demanding her to take down the things he just doesn’t want his coworkers there and was planning to skip. I love cartoons I love weird things as well, but if I had like some zoom meeting, I wouldn’t have decorations in background. As OP story, mention presentation important in his field. We might like to wear T-shirts and a jeans, but we present ourselves differently in those environments.
Story 2: NTA. He tried the game and had positive feedback for her. If the girlfriend wants someone to actually review the game, she should get someone who is into the genre and can give her informed, constructive criticism. Her boyfriend is not that person. It would be like my wife bringing me a bowl of homemade blackberry cobbler and ice cream. I'd give it a taste, but I'm not eating the whole thing because I don't like blackberries. That doesn't mean I don't appreciate her work. I doesn't mean I don't love her. It just means I don't like blackberries.
And I’m curious why did OP bring the coworker over to his gfs? Has he ever brought them over to his place? He talks about how she lives in a swanky high rise but what about him? And the big display was in a bedroom. What business did they have in that room?
He didn't tell her to decorate it in another way though. He didn't like it that much and thinks it childish but don't say anything. He seems to agree with her decor and her interests being her prerogative. In the same way his interests and opinions are his prerogative. He doesn't have to invite his friends over if he doesn't like the interior that much and his friends are the same. Where he is the buthole is in how he said it being confrontational.
I disagree with Story 2 he said he doesn't read that stuff, but she still pushed for it. as expected, he got bored and said he couldn't anymore. someone said that she should get bate testers AND SHE SHOULD. I have read of the family helping out and stuff but they don't have to do it its a choice and he said no thanks.
Have you read a visual novel, Rslash? They can be pretty lengthy, which is why I'm not really into them myself. People normally need minutes, not HOURS, before they know if they enjoy something and he clearly DOES NOT enjoy the genre. He told her so! He told her it's just not for him, but she pressed him and he got annoyed. Given the fact he did at least read it for a little while, he knows she did some pretty good stuff and supports her work. Frankly, he's not the target audience. The GF needs to ask around for people who do enjoy reading some visual novels and get some proper feedback. Also, you CHOSE to read his post, as did the commenters. That "Top comment" is an absolute joke. You're comparing your CHOICE to read like 1-2 minutes of his post versus the multiple HOURS he would have to read a visual novel, going over multiple choices and endings. That's ridiculous. Do you need another vacation? I swear, you have some takes that are seriously off.
It’s way more about supporting your significant others passion project because you aren’t into it and got bored. That’s selfish. It’s about him only spending 15 minutes on his partners passion project then the format not being his taste. Just disrespectful and rude, she clearly wants her partner to experience something she spent two years on.
@@hannahfreckles247 Okay, first off: Something about your choice of words is not making partial sense to me. Next, let's recall something here. She wants him to experience the entire thing, however long that is, in a genre he's not fond of. She KNOWS this and still expects him to go through it? Nah. OP set a boundary when he initially declined before deciding to break it and read the visual novel for 15 mins. OP told her he wasn't intent on reading any further as it's not helpful to his GF. She pushed for him to do more when she should've left him alone and find a tester with an interest in reading visual novels. She should've respected his boundaries. You can show support without having to partake in the product your partner made or their various hobbies. Many comments on this video share that view. If something's not for you, it's not for you. It doesn't mean you can't show support some other way.
@@hannahfreckles247it isn't disrespectful in the least. My gf doesn't enjoy reading stories and I've written four of them. I've never tried to force her or guilt her into reading any of them. I have friends who enjoy reading and writing for that. She does however enjoy takes my shitty art for the stories and improving them. You just have shitty relationship expectations.
@@S4intINS4N3 no no no it’s it’s about the giving up after 15 minutes and his attitude. Y’all just too chronically online to even experience dating so I’m not surprised you can’t understand why he’s such an asshole
The "Pay for it" story: I need to break it to you rSlash, "doormats" WOULD pass it along. Because if they didn't THEY would "hear about it" when they got home. Of course OP is NTA, but he could have handled the whole thing better. He knew she was having a rough time and chose to say he'd charge her anyway. What he should have said was "I'm sorry, but the way your boyfriend acted, by expecting me to pay for 2 days when I've helped you out for over a year, has made me really uncomfortable. At least for now I'm no longer comfortable giving you a ride to work, as I don't know what he'll do next." Or something like that. OP did not have to take out his frustration at her boyfriend on her.
Id like to point out visual novels can be easily 8 hour's long to complete all the routes, and if you dont like the style of game then its just 8 hour's of not enjoying it
It's not about him though. It's about giving feedback to the woman he claims to love ... When my now wife was working on her bachelor's thesis, I was helping her format it properly and read it as least twice for spell check and such things, putting a total of at least 30h into helping her make it as best as she could. It's in a field I have no clue about and a topic I couldn't care less about. But it's the woman I love. So who cares whether it was actually fun to do? (spoiler: it wasn't)
@@brag0001and that’s cool that you did that for her but the Op cares . My girlfriend likes to write romance novels and she knows they’re not my thing and not once has she forced me to read them. She’s asked me and I tried but I can’t get into it and she respects it. I love to play video games but she’s not into that but she’s tried to play with me before and it just wasn’t her thing. You can still support someone without having to make them do something they don’t want
Bingo. And a person who doesn't like the genre will not be able to give effective feedback about her game which clearly she wanted to know. The expectation of good feedback from a person who does not enjoy the genre is unfair.
That's exactly what I was thinking. Trying to force someone to do something that they can't enjoy and aren't motivated for is going to make them more upset. While I understand her wanting him to check it out, he's not going to give her the feedback she wants. He can't look at it and be like, 'Yes, I see this and that, I think blank was really good'. He can see the time and effort and appreciate it, but he frankly will not care about the writing or how good it is ect. He won't have the feedback she needs. It's like forcing someone to watch a movie you like or play a game you like but they aren't into. It doesn't matter if you made it, if it's not their thing it isn't their thing. If you aren't interested in it, forcing yourself to sit through something you don't have the motivation for will not do you any favors.
The GF Decor story: At the end of the day, OP has a right to his opinion, and i wanna point out SHE'S the one who kept pushing to let her host when he was fine with skipping his turn. As cool as she sounds, not everyone is gonna like what you like so let him be.
Yeah that's what I think no one's really a jerk here. And remember this isn't just the boyfriend's opinion both his mom and a co-worker were put off by his girlfriend's decor. Also yeah she's not the employee there. If she was the employee then okay she is free to host the party there decorations be damned and who knows maybe some people would find it cool, but you know what she's not the employee her boyfriend is and if he's not comfortable with it that's his choice.
I love when adults brag about how grown up they are because they don't like cartoons or whatever. I'm a 50 year old grandmother who still watches SpongeBob and eats Count Chocula. If the grandkids happen to be there, they join me.
"My mom even asked if my girlfriend was autistic after seeing the apartment." So?! What does your girlfriend possibly being autistic have to do with anything? And even if she was, the girlfriend shouldn't have to mask in her own home. I honestly hope she breaks up with him.
Visual Novel Game: As someone who plays games quite abit (including visual novels). This is not simply about “supporting the gf”. If OP does not like that game style he cannot get into the game meaning she will not get a good opinion. And in a way she is using the “im your gf card” to get him to do something *she knows* he does not like. So yeah nah dude is not the AH. Home decour: eh everyone is allowed to decorate as they like. However, she cannot get mad Op does not want to bring people over when 1) her decour is not inviting to others 2) he is in a field where appearance matters
Story 2: I mean, maybe he wasn't as supportive as he could've been, but if it isn't his type of game, then he shouldn't be forced to play it. It isn't everyone's cup of tea, it shouldn't be that big of a deal
Exactly what I said! I hate eggs over easy or sunny side up you give me the fanciest dish that deserves to be served in a Michelin Star restaurant, I'm going to say no thank you because runny eggs aren't my thing
@charlesmaxey9342 That's not the same thing, OP's gf didn't make this game for OP, she made it as a passion project and wanted him to try it out and be supportive of her. She didn't try to ignore his preferences. If your partner was a chef and made a dish they were really proud of that they put a ton of work into and you won't eat it just because you don't like some of the ingredients then you're the ahole.
@@marinonightingale he's an a-hole for not at least putting in an hour or so of time to her work, yes but, asking him a do a complete play through of her game to give feedback is an a hole move when he said he didn't enjoy those types of games. Everyone sucks here.
@@marinonightingaleI think it's ESH. OP was being mean and rude, but expecting someone to play the ENTIRE game when visual novels can be as long as 60-100 hour RPGs and he dislikes the genre is silly and equally rude. She could have loaded up some key moments she wanted feedback on and he could have sucked it up and played them for her. Easy compromise.
2nd story: honestly, I think the GF is stupid for asking OP who is not into reading, to test it and then get upset that he doesn't like it. He is just not the target she should look for. It's like asking someone, who isn't at all into fantasy, to play D&D or a toddler to play Outlast and then be suprised they don't like it
I extremly disagree with the bad boyfriend thing, yo uhave no idea how long a visual novel is whats gonna come out of finnishing it except him saying it's boring as hell if he's not enjoying it. Comparing reading 13 lines to something that long is stupid.
Story 2: Jesus, Rslash, get a clue here. The boyfriend has made it politely clear to their gf that they are not the target audience of this game and, therefore, not the right person to judge. And she's turning that into him being "unsupportive"? Give me an effing break. I'm into star wars and my gf isn't at all. So why should I expect her to judge if I make a Star Wars ttrpg campaign? Op's only crime was not suggesting better people they know to try it instead. They were supportive, even giving positive feedback. NTAH, the gf needs to recognise the target audience before she tries publishing that game. And you, Rslash, need to realise that supporting your significant other doesn't always mean having to give feedback on everything they do. Seriously. This WASN'T something OP could judge accurately and, therefore, wasn't the ah for pointing this out.
Yeah, imagine if a guy helped make a first-person shooter and his girlfriend wasn't into those kinds of games. She then played about 15 minutes of the 10-hour campaign or multiplayer to be supportive, but the boyfriend wanted her to finish it even though she wasn't into that type of game. I can guarantee RSlash would be siding with the girlfriend in this scenario. OP is NTA. He gave it a fair shot, even though it wasn't his type of game. Besides, how do we know it's only 2 hours? And how do we know she won't make him play it more to see the choices play out?
@@akl2k7 visual novels can take as long as 20 hours to get every single possible ending. So it’s not surprising OP doesn’t want to finish it. Rslash was dead wrong on this one.
The really messed up part is that rslash and the people on the post seem to only want to focus on him not wanting to read. Even getting to the point of people calling him illiterate.
I would like to point out that a majority of adults these days do have “Childish” decor in their own homes because they’re not afraid to display who they are. I can already tell that the Op from that post will try to control the decor if he moves in with her.
I'm in my fifties and most of the people that I know have more than a few "childish" decorations in their home. My next door neighbour has a shrine to his favorite hockey team which takes up several rooms. My best friend likes old technology and has old weird scientific equipment all around his house. My wife loves Snoopy, so we have Snoopy decorations all over the house. I think you're right about him trying to take control if he moves in.
Story 4, it's one thing to say "hey, in my field everyone is focused on image and even though it sucks, your place doesn't present that image". But no, OP himself is judging his gf and uses the word "juvenile" multiple times. F that guy, girlfriend deserves better.
Story 2 : NTA, your partner isn’t your publisher, your partner isn’t your proofreader. Your partner must support you but they don’t have to work for you. It’s as simple has that.
the best way be get a truthful reaction is to have someone you don't have a connection with test it, gf is looking for validation through her connect to op or is just being lazy to find the right tester
@@dudeorduuude5211 I enjoy visual novels but it's not for everyone. It's like baked sweets, some people just don't like sweets no matter who baked them.
@@dudeorduuude5211 Have you ever played a visual novel? Are you a big VN fan? If not, kindly be quiet. If you have, you should understand forcing someone to sit through a minimum of 4 hours (on the absolute low end) of what would essentially be nails on a chalkboard to them is entirely unreasonable. Would you drag someone who can't stand horror movies to a Nightmare on Elm Street marathon?
2nd story: You're comparing spending literally 1 minute of reading vs hours upon hours of reading for a type of game OP, and the vast majority of gamers, does not like. Visual Novels are extremely niche and you'd be hard pressed to find ANYONE willing to go farther than 15 to 30 minutes into one of those games without them being either a massive fan of the genre, or an avid reader. Or if it's "My Pig Princess" by CyanCapsule. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Agreed. It would be like him making her play a first-person shooter when she doesn't like those. And then making her play the whole campaign when she's still not into it. NTA
RSlash, you missed the entire point on the 2nd story. OP's trying & failing to adequately say that he can't give her constructive feedback, & it will only hurt her feelings, because the 2 main concepts of her game's genre is precisely what he dislikes about that genre. She'll want answers he can't give her (there's no common ground). To even ask him for his opinion is setting herself up to have her feelings hurt, & she's responsible for hurting them. He's acknowledging the truth about himself upfront, & how it won't be beneficial to her at all to push him for more. She's disregarding him, getting her feelings hurt (as predicted, despite trying to avoid that very thing), & trying to blame him for the hurt feelings she caused herself - she's acting entitled & unfair towards OP. PS. Hope you like humble pie, it's d-bag flavored. Apply the guys scenario to you & your wife. Have you ever spared her feelings, even at the cost of making yourself look bad? That's what OP is trying to do. So neither of you are actually d-bags, just wanting to spare your SO hurt feelings.
yep there is only really 2 posiblities 1: He lies and says "its great", she gets upset because its obvious he doesn't actualy like it. 2: He tells the truth "i don't like it", she gets upset because he doesn't like it.
@@stevenscott2718 You're exactly right! I was afraid no one would understand what I was trying to say & mean. I feel better since you & the other person commented to show you comprehended my meaning.
I mean. I've written and self published 8 full length novels over the last 10 years. My wife of 19 years hasn't read any of them. Doesn't mean she's not supportive of my writing, just means she's not into the kind of fiction I write. I'd love to get her feedback, but if she's not into the subject matter how can she give me a realistic review?
reminds of the scene from DS9 where Wayoun ask Kira if the painting he has been given is any good, and Kira gets a little bit snotty because her friend painteded it, And his responce is "no i have no idea if this is good or not, art apreciation hasn't been programed into me."
The girl with the cool ass decor: if you don't want her I'll take her~ Eta: i have a friend with a wet specimen shark and i got super excited when i saw it
Every time I hear about The Home decor lady, I get so mad on her behalf. She sounds rad as hell! Homes *should* be a reflection of those who live in them. It's fun to see the personality of those you love reflected in their space. My step-dad was a huge Angry birds fan, so his office had them. My favorite boss was a Dallas Cowboys fan and put up little silver stars at his desk and signed memorabilia. I couldn't care less about either of those things, but like they make me smile in connection to people I care about--And those were a weird family relation and a beloved work colleague at their work areas. Why OP can't wrap his head around how cool his girlfriend is, and just let go the part he doesn't get are beyond me. I would give some grace to someone with a proper phobia of spiders some grace in the situation, but that's something that can be managed. If I was willing to host and someone gave me grief for my abundance of anime and video game memorabilia, I would never invite them back because they were bad guests. And if were OP's girlfriend, I'd kick the loser out. He doesn't seem to like her very much based on how he describes her interests and passions.
Story #2: Her apartment sounds so interesting. Good for her for doing her own thing. I love it. The GF might be neurotypical and decorated based on her special interest. OP is the AH. He doesn't need to police her interests.
@@andredunbar3773yeah I think that’s what OP meant, just got the wrong term by the looks of things! And I’m autistic and have gas masks, animal skulls, and Celtic art around my home, why? Because I love gas masks and think they’re cool and have a whole cabinet of them on display (like some from WWII), the animal skulls because I think they’re beautiful in their own way, and the Celtic art is because I’m Gaelic Scottish and my niche interest in Neolithic, Pictish and Gaelic history, as in I have travelled all around my country to visit various old carved stones/stone circles/cairns to document them, so I have Celtic/Pictish art around my home. Is it a strange mix? Absolutely. Would I care if someone judged me for my neurodivergent interests and ways? Lmao no, you just won’t be invited to my home ever again!
Last story: when OP mentioned the in-laws wanting to fund the girl's sweet16 party, i knew it, i discovered where she got the entitled and spoiled atitude from
To be fair to OP in the visual novel story, the gf isn't gonna get great feedback from someone who doesn't enjoy the genre. If you arent into visual novels, they're gonna be long and boring.
Story 3 : The mother also gets an a-hole score. She only took Sam to get icecream out of pure favoritism. I mean the dad could have taken Emma, but it isnt clear if the family owns more than one car, so I give him the benefit of the doubt.
I agree. At least OP has Emma’s back. And honestly Emma’s classes better prepare her for college. Sam can boast about her As from her general classes but college will give her a rude awakening.
Agreed
There's an update where the mom acknowledged that she messed up because after the ice cream, she got the full story from the girl. Op and wife are currently trying to figure out how to deal with this.
@@ArmageddonAngelthe wife needs counseling on how to not be a gullible POS.
That's what I was gonna say, it's clear the mom has a favorite here.
Man, the girl in story four sounds awesome! Makes decent money, has her own place, and has cool interests that she is passionate about.
Sounds cool to me as well.
I wish I had the same! My walls in my office are covered in art, enamel pins, and plushies! OP should break it off with her if he thinks having a hobby is juvenile. Also, this is HER house so what the heck is on about???
Screw anyone who tries to dimmer her shine
ngl I would be a bit scared of the bugs (I have really severe arachnophobia) but the only thing I would do if I were a guest is let the host (the person that invited me if they are not the one that owns the place) know about the phobia privately and leave it at that, maybe avoid that area of their home. I would not expect someone to change their home decor to cater to me though (Though, if they decided to remove the tarantulas when I was in attendance I would bake them a cake xD )
I know, right?! This dude got a 10/10 girlfriend and he's being ungrateful. I'm not interested in dating anyone and even *i'm* jealous at the absolute catch this guy landed.
Story 3: EMMA’S TAKING COLLEGE LEVEL COURSES!!!!! Bs and Cs ARE As in comparison to high school!!! Sam needed that reality check, and the Mom needs a favoritism check. No wonder the punishments never work!
There was an update that the mother misunderstood the situation. I guess she walked in on Sam crying that what had happened and I guess made something up for Emma.
I once took a class in college that had so many high schoolers in there that I didn't realize they were high schoolers and then ended up making a girl cry once I realized I couldn't actually date her. What made that situation more sucky was that she had the personality that makes me want to try extra hard not to make her cry.
TL:DR took a college class with like 75% high schoolers in it.
I don't know how it is in the US, but when I was doing university essays in the UK, anything over 70 out of 100 was an A (or technically a "First", but y'know what I mean). For context though, anything over a 90 was the Professor basically saying "This is better than I could have done".
@@Geothesponge111 i have a professor in the university that said "100 is for God, 90 for the author of the book, 80 for me and bellow that is for you"
@Geothesponge111 grades in the states go 100-90 /89 -80/79-70 etc etc.
The boyfriend in the 4th story doesn't seem to understand that it is, in fact, mature to confidently express yourself and like what you like without being shamed by boring people.
To be frank, I'd only have a problem with the tarantulas, being arachnophobic - I wouldn't spend time in that room, no way no how. I don't care it's dead.
On the other hand, I'm a figure collector, so I have my own "autism", to quote the mother.
Boom 💥 💯 like he's right to not bring his ppl there since they wont appreciate it, but his words show that he is sucky like them just a bit less so 😅
What I find funny is that she has her own place, which is one of the most mature things you can do. It's her space that she finances and decorates as she likes. Pretty silly to take that as immature just because her tastes differ.
Exactly, i own a couple of pokemon plushies and have them littered around. Because- i like pokemon lmao. So why wouldn't i wanna decorate my personal space with them
I agree but I don’t think it’s his fault for not wanting to bring people over
"Idk where my daughter is getting this behavior from!"
"Both sets of grandparents think Im being too harsh"
I think thats the connection, OP. Cut off the grandparents til they agree to back you up in raising this young lady. You only have 2 more years to sort this ish out, everyone needs to get on board
I thought the same thing. I am a grandparent and I would have made sure the daughter knew I was in the parents side in this situation.
i honestly think that the grandparents are going to host a secret birthday party for her, op needs to keep an eye close
Pretty much, if the grandparents are well off to pay a sweet 16, they probably have spoiled her rotten into an entitled brat
Yup. That entitlement didn’t just appear on its own. Frankly, the fact that the Dad is even questioning it says that he has probably caved many, many times before. The fact that the other girl has drifted away from the group says a lot, too. She’s found out someone else who can be a real friend, not this horrible entitled brat.
Nah, she's 16. It's too late now. The only way she'll learn is to be cast to the streets and live the rest of her life in deep, abject poverty.
Story 4 - "my own mother asked if she was autistic..." I can see where OP gets his suckass attitude from.
I wish rSlash pointed that bit out because when hearing that, it really seems like OP's mother is one of those people who hate people with autism while the coworkers are also under that level. Like, if I was OP and had friends and parents who get freaked out by this, I would've actually cut contact with all of them. It's very clear that OP has a friend problem, but he refuses to see it and instead thinks that his girlfriend's room is the real problem just to keep up with his friendships and family's good terms. Serious, it's like the Pokemon GF story all over again.
@@spydersoup8447 what's the pokemon gf story, is that in one of rslash's videos? which one?
@@digitaldritten Yes, it was. It was about OP dating a girl obsessed with Pokemon and his friends were making fun of him for it, making him believe that she's the problem. But then in an update, he mentions that the comments made him realize that it's not his girlfriend that's the problem, his friends are the real problem and after ending his friendship with those guys and apologized to his girlfriend, she helped him get into Pokemon.
I appreciate unique individuals, they make life fun!
If you see someone getting bullied they're probably the cooler person of the two.
Was going to say something about autism but it works for people who aren't autistic as well.
That guy complaining about "childish" decor: you know what else is childish? Being judgemental of a person's interests and decor. He'd hate my place; it's horse themed. Lol
And mine is full of Pokemon plushies, Anime figurines and JoJos Bizarre Adventure Posters .... I am 31 M.
I'm working on filling my room with Hello Kitty items :D It's quite nice
And I have movie posters all over the place, my game room has D&D maps and my office is 80’s themed. If this is such a problem for him, he shouldn’t be with her
Whoop whoop I colect model horses from breyer and I'm a young adult woman In my 20`s
But but his mommy told him his girlfriend is autistic ! /s
Lol this guy's definitely not as mature as he thinks he is.
I like how the daughter called her friend a “gold digger”… when that was exactly how she herself was acting, like everyone else owed her etc.
It's almost like the only thing a bond is worth for is whenever or not the gift they bring is nice instead of of it being based on the fact that they put a lot of thought behind it, even with the situration she was in. This straight up reminds me of the story about how OP got insulted by a mother all because her wedding ring was a plain silver ring and said that if her husband got her a ring like that, she'd throw him out and was teaching her daughter to be that snobby. Or even the story about OP's husband baking a cake because they were so low on money and she was pushing him down because it's not as tasty as the cakes from restaurants or bakeries and she'd much rather have a cake from those places. Like, it sucks that these people play down these people thinking of them just because the gift is not good enough for them.
Yeah...that one really struck me as bizarre and absurd, possibly a freudian slip from the daughter's part. The friend bought the gift at the thrift store, how the hell does that make her a gold digger? Even as a petty and spiteful insult that doesn't make sense.
For my son's 12th birthday he wanted to invite everyone in his class but one kid. This kid wasn't a bully or anything, just on the autistic spectrum and weird. We told him that either he invites a few close friends, or everyone and that he couldn't leave just one kid out. The kid's older sister even offered to come with him. My son didn't budge...so we had cake a presents at home, but he didn't get a party.
Today my son and that kid are friends and co workers.
good on you for teaching your son to be kind
My baby brother has non verbal autism and id be so crushed if everyone but him was invited to a party
I have autism. and in elementary school and middle school, I never got invited to parties. Because I was the "class weirdo" (and because I liked girls and I'm a female) and I've met other people and kids with autism. And they are just people who want to socialize and have fun. We are all human beings. It's no fair to assume someone is weird without giving them a chance.
May I say you are amazing for doing that. My daughter was always the one who was the only one in the class not invited to parties and she is the only kid I know who invited every child in the class and have no one turn up at her party. The reason my daughter is deaf and has mild learning difficulties she had friends right up until she got her hearing aids and then everyone treated her differently. The mother of her best friend came to me and said you must stop your child playing with mine because I can't have my child playing with a child like that. I pointed out she was fine with it for the past 3 years so why she said if she knew she was deaf she would have never allowed it. I will point out it was mainly the parents I was told we should take her to a special school to be with her own kind, kids like her should be locked up and hidden are just a few things said to me. She eventually made a couple od friends and they did a suprise 16th for her and she cried as it was the first party someone came to she was so happy. I hated seeing the way she was treated all because she got hearing aids. Her parties were days out with our adult friends who she loved and she enjoyed them but she missed out on so much when sh3 was little. Things changed when she went to college and now she has many friends but it got to the point when she hated birthdays when she was little. So seeing your comment makes me smile you are amazing 😊
Did he ever got a party later or no
@@rjlangaman4741 Not that year. He thought we would cave but we stuck to our guns. During the years we had parties where he took a few friends to escape rooms, lazer tag and stuff like that.
“And etchings of some weird triangle guy”
Bill is a proud weirdo. Show some respect OP.
Fr!
I went looking in the comments for the Gravity Falls fans.
He said “weird triangle guy” and my husband and I shared a LOOK.
@@samaccardi same lmao
Yo, she's got really cool decor! The fact that he doesn't know who Bill is is a red flag. Like, dude, learn about your gf's interests
I promise you in the birthday story it is 100% guaranteed she is getting that mindset and that attitude from the grandparents.
Yeah and as long as she keeps in touch with them they will encourage her that she’s not at fault and her parents will cave
The fact that both sets are on her side has me wondering if they've always been in competition with her for her affections, and therefore helped create a brat
Her behavior could also come from social media, Plenty of toxic folks making cringe videos out there.
I wouldn't doubt if the grandparents pay for a "secret" birthday party, too.
I never had an elaborate birthday party with all of my friends.. the most I ever got was cake and family members rarely any gifts at all. You know when I got my first party? when I paid for it.... she is entitled because they give her everything
(clutches pearls) Oh my, her friend is getting a sweet sixteen party, how would it look if our daughter didn't also get one...
Seriously the grandparents... sure, but also the parents.
Last story: NTA what is wrong with this kid? She doesn't deserve a party acting like this. How is OP ruining her social life when it is clear to me she is doing a good job of doing that herself?
Sounds like the daughter is the Official Mean Girl of her school.
@@condorboss3339 She is.
Hey, as a writer on the visual novel story: it always hurts when you work so hard for so incredibly long on a piece, especially across YEARS, and you show it to someone and they don't like it. But OP did one thing right from the very start: he told is girlfriend up front, multiple times, that he was categorically uninterested in the medium, meaning he was NEVER going to enjoy her work. She could have written the next game of the year and he still wouldn't enjoy it because he doesn't enjoy the medium. It's not a personal fault to not enjoy every medium or every genre; it's a form of self-recognition.
As for posting something to Reddit, a textual medium? Of course he expects people to read his post. He posted something to a text-based site, what else are you gonna do, turn it into a collage? But the thing is, he probably isn't forcing anyone to come and look at his post specifically. Just like you don't go to Steam if you don't want to play a game or to RUclips if you don't want to put on a video, you don't go to AITA if you don't want to read posts.
Am I giving this more thought and sympathy than I maybe should? Probably. He does come off as a selfish bundle of inconsistent internal narratives. It wouldn't surprise me if it really is as simple as "he's too self-absorbed to do something to validate his incredibly talented partner because it's not fun for him". But sometimes, there's some factor you just can't get past, not because the rest of the product isn't worth it, but because of how much you dislike that one factor. For him, it seems to be reading.
Honistly VN games are fucken amazing and fun when done well but its perfectly understandable that op doesnt like that kind of game its the same idea if his girlfriend made a shooter game, and he hated shooters, at least against his own intrist after telling her he didnt like that style of game many times he tried it for a fair amount of time for not liking that style and told her what he thought thats going far beyond whats owed here
Yeah I'm agreeing with you on this one I thought that R slash was wrong. It is okay for your partner to have a hobby that you're not into and that you don't even want to get into. There are ways to show your partner that you support her hobbies without being into them.
I also get that the girlfriend would be sad because she wants to show off this thing she did and her partner's not interested and It sucks but she shouldn't try shoving it down his throat.
@@bland9876 ya if any thing maby 50/50 aholes?
Yep, this is one of the few times where I don't agree with Rslash. The man is setting boundaries and his girlfriend is basically trying to trespass. That's a sign of a narcissistic person and her reaction to his PREEMPTIVE and MOTIVATED refusal is another one. He even made an effort for her and it still wasn't enough in her eyes.
I'm not saying they should break up or anything but hot damn leave the man alone if he doesn't like to read, it doesn't mean he doesn't love you or support you.
That's a lot of words too bad I ain't reading any of them no seriously you wrote an entire f****** essay
For Story 2, I think a major factor that was left out is the length of the game/visual-novel. If it’s on the shorter side, then he might as well finish it. However, there are plenty of text-games/visual novels that would take hours to finish, let alone navigate through multiple endings. If she put years into making it, then her’s might be on the longer side. If that’s the case, then him playing long enough to sample the game is more reasonable than forcing him to actually finish it. Especially if reading isn’t his strong-suite.
Yeah I don't understand why some people are like this.
I feel like the bf need to break up, that's a very toxic relationship.
You can't expect someone to love something just because you are the one makes them.
Idk man. I'm a writer, not a visual novelist just regular stories, and my partner doesn't like reading but he'll still read anything I write even when I don't ask no matter the length. He's also a very slow reader so even a 90 page novela would take him up to a week to finish. He still does it because he knows I work hard on my stories but am too shy/self conscious to share them with many people and wants me to feel good about my hobby. Replace this with video games: if a dude spent weeks or months building a world in Minecraft and finally finished it and wanted to show his girlfriend but after 10 minutes of looking and explaining things she just goes "I'm not really interested in this sorta stuff" and walks off. Would that not be seen as rude and disrespectful towards your partner?
"Weird triangle guy" How dare they disrespect Bill
Cypher
When he said it, I was like “I definitely know who he’s talking about.” 🤣
I know. I saw that and was she sounds like my kinda person!
It could also be Phineas from "Phineas and Ferb." 😂😂😂
This proves how uncultured and unfun OP is. OP's mom is also an AH for thinking the girlfriend is autistic.
I saw gonna say that, you never disrespect my triangle guy, Bill. He is the best demon ever and I will protect him.
Last story: you don't "ruin the daughter's social life" by not throwing her party, you''ll ruin her social life if you _do_ throw her a party. She's already lost a friend due to being nasty and entitled, and she'll continue losing friends, if she doesn't grow out of being a brat.
She’s ruining her own social life. She lost the insulted friend, and others at the party didn’t like her attitude towards thrifted or less expensive gifts. If she keeps that up all her friends will drift away
Story 3: Sam's not the only one that needs a reality check, mom could use one herself. You didn't set your daughter on fire you made her put her money where her mouth was. And where'd the other daughter's ice cream after being made fun of by her sister for not having straight A's?
Actually, there were updates to that story. rSlash sorta mis-spoke. It was SAM who told the mother what happened. The kid gave her mother a sob-story, twisting what happened to make herself an innocent victim. OP had a talk with his wife afterward and having heard the REAL story, she agreed with the OP and apologized for siding with Sam and raging at the OP.
@@Eppon6 great, except one more thing needs to happen. Sam should be punished for lying to her mother about what happened and for bullying her sister, because pending your parents against each other so one would baby you is a big no.
@@Eppon6the wife is still a bad person...
@@thetruth1816for?
@rylandgreer7726 immediately taking sides and did not stop Sam's bullying as it seems that this isn't the first time Sam is bullying her sister...
last story: "the girl is no longer her friend anyway" - this arguement would have been a reason for me to be even harsher, because not only is she refusing to apologize for her entitlement from the previous year, but now she also is also saying that only her friends are worth apologizing to.
She doesn’t realize that it will lead people to not wanting to be your friend anyway
Yeah, this part seems like the daughter is like "Well, this person I was mean to because she didn't get what I want from me is no longer my friend. Good, because this is a great excuse for me say that I don't have to apologize".
As soon as I heard that line I thought "see this is exactly why she isn't your friend anymore"
Test story: the mother is an AH too. Like she is enabling the daughter’s bad attitude by undermining the father’s right to give her the needed dose of reality she needed by taking only her, and not the other daughter who was bullied by her enabled know-it-all bratty bully of a sister. You know who the golden child is for the mother dearest.
Yeah, as soon as I heard the mother's reaction I thought, "Well, it's no wonder Sam would always go back to making fun of Emma, the mother's enabling her behind the husband's back."
Your response to home decor guy is brutal and I'm so here for it. Also my bedroom is Fallout themed. I have adult money. I spend it how I want.
That sounds awesome 😎! Any Fallout in particular?
Fellow Fallout fans!
Ooo love Fallout! Also I'm in my 60s so definitely adult
No kidding, OP got roasted alive!
ADULT MONEY FTW!
"Some weird triangle guy"
"It's funny how dumb you are" - Bill Cipher
*Perfect*
Story 4- I'm a 42 year old woman. I'm literally planning to decorate my office in dinosaur. BECAUSE I'm an adult woman with adult money!
Facts. If I’m dating someone and my Interests scare them because I’m comfortable to decorate my house with them it’s not going to work out in the long run. I’m not going to fake who I am, and with his mom’s comment is she going to start asking her son to “Get her to start acting like an adult, and not a child” or see about not bringing her to family gatherings
I like your idea. Imagine walking into your Boss's office and seeing a kick-ass Dinosaur Theme Office 😍🥰
And people are allowed to not like your stuff and if you ask them, they are allowed to be honest.
@@anonymouslyopinionated656 There's a difference between "I don't like your decor" and "You're childish for liking that decor".
One is an opinion, the other is a judgement.
Story 4: Why are you with someone who has passions you so clearly hate? What were you expecting to happen if you ever moved in together? For her to give up everything she loves and never speak of them again because God forbid you have to deal with things you aren't personally interested in?
This is common for controlling people, who get someone and hoping that they can reshape them into being their ideal spouse instead of going thought the time and hard work of finding the exact person they want.
Story 2: as someone who plays visual novels, forcing someone to read one, even a short one, is not it.
I looked at the original post and most people there probably never played a visual novel. I love playing them but if I stop enjoying one I just drop it, it's not a genre you can just pick up if you don't enjoy it
Not to mention, everyone is bashing the "blackmail" part but like, this IS kind of emotional blackmail, "I'm your gf so play this thing you don't enjoy or I'll ignore you"
People making a lot of analogies but I feel like this is more like you gf cooking something with a flavor you REALLY don't like no matter how well made it is and then when you take a few bites and tell her you don't like that flavor she still insists you eat it
Yeah sometimes you do thing you dont like for your partner but why is it only being expected of the bf?
Most people are saying they'd do it for their gf but that is your *choice*, not them demanding you do it
If doing thing you don't enjoy bc of a relation turns into an obligation instead of a choice then that relation might be doomed
Thank you, a sane person. I said as long as he's been supportive in other ways he shouldn't have to.
He supported her by playing for 15 minutes. As someone who likes stories in games but hates visual novels, I can agree with op. I’d get hella bored and quit after a few minutes no matter how good the game is. AND I LIKE READING ACTUAL BOOKS! It’s not everyone’s cup of tea and the gf IS emotionally blackmailing him and she IS being childish. He’s not her editor or publisher and shouldn’t have to do more than take a look at it and support her in her journey.
Bro/sis. Not only am I liking your comment, but I want to upvote, award and tweet it straight to Rslash
I was looking for a comment like this! I've never heard of visual novels, tbh, but I compared it to one of my best friends. I write, I want to be a full time author one day, and I asked one of my best friends if he'd read something I wrote and critique it. He asked what genre it was, and I told him YA, kind of problem novel-ish. And he straight up said that he was probably the worst person to critique that style of novel, because it's not a category he's interested in, so if he ever got around to reading it at all, his comments wouldn't be very helpful.
Did that hurt? Yes. Did I try a bit to convince him otherwise? Yes. But ultimately, I accepted it, because that's what people who care about each other are supposed to do.
This
Home decor story:: shoot, she sounds amazing. I'd LOVE to live in a place like hers. Op I'd dumb. She is a gem
I agree! I’m a huge futurama fan myself and I think I’d definitely get along with her
@@gummidon1618 before I found the owl house, Futurama was always my favorite cartoon, and probably my favorite show overall lol
The bugs and absolutely terrifying ocean creatures would probably scare the piss out of me half the time but she sounds like an interesting person with such unique decor tbh
Saaame she sounds so great ❤❤❤❤
Oh my god. This place sounds awesome. I can't believe OP is such a douche
S5: “…etchings of some weird triangle guy…”
Me: (an animation enthusiast) “Le gasp! It’s Bill Cipher, isn’t it?”
(Also OP, YTA.)
Last Story: The girl is a brat (I could use stronger words). Do not give her a party. By her behaviour, she doesn't deserve one.
Story two: OP was in a no win situation. A visual novel is a hell of a lot more than a two hour time investment. I sympathize with the guy I'm not much of a reader either. That said even if he did get through the whole thing there is no way he could give her constructive criticism and walk away unscathed, and if he told her it was great she probably wouldn't believe him. The only thing OP is TBH for is not finding a more diplomatic way of saying "no".
After a certain amount of time, he'd probably just hate it and have nothing good to honestly say. And I wouldn't blame him for a second.
Op is NTA he said several times that doesnt like VNs
The game story is more nuanced than that. She's making a game for a very specific demographic and expecting a full test and review from someone NOT IN that demographic! I like visual novels, my friend Mat does not. His girlfriend developed a VN but she didn't ask him to test it cuz he doesn't like VNs! Her team tasked an ACTUAL VN player to test it!
Additionally, my fiance is a webcomic artist. I edit one of her projects and am that projects #1 fan, but she's developing another project I don't care much for so she asks a friend who DOES like it. It's called knowing your audience. The girlfriend's project will never succeed if she tries forcing it outside of the target audience!
Fact of the matter, this is not a relationship issue, this is a developer's issue. business, if you will. I'm a self published author. Why would I ask someone who likes comedy films to read my murder mystery novel?
@@HarlequinWriterit’s actually both as she’s pushing it on someone not in her target audience and breaking clearly set boundaries.
@@lduker9731 Yo! I was so stuck on her professional faux pas I didn't even think of that part!
I was thinking hte same. It is much more than a 2 hour time commitment if she is expecting a full review (from someone who doesn't like and is unfamiliar with VNs). Also I read the comments on the original and Almost all of them are hung up on OP not knowing what blackmail is, but in my opinion what she is doing is emotioal blackmail (not talking to him at all if he doesn't play).
@@black61518juniorthat is definitely emotional blackmail
Story 4: his reasoning (coworker judging in his industry) was reasonable but his personal sentiments and wording make him the asshole for me. If what my coworkers think of me is such a make or break I would simply say “nothing personal, but they didn’t react so well last time so I’d rather use my place so people have less to say”
Yeah I was looking for a comment like this. Work gathering hosted by you are a very different thing from people visiting you in private. You should and definitely would, try to make as professional and 'clean' an appeal as possible. This isn't about personal flavour, your hobbies or such. It's a work gathering. I just would've hosted it elsewhere tbh, always, not just in this case. Because I also like to have my peculiar decor in my house. So my home isn't what I'd call a work gathering environment. It's not rude to say that. Private life and work isn't the same and usually better kept separate.
Not the best phrasing on my end, sorry if it sounds a little odd. English isn't my mother tongue.
I don't think OP is an AH for saying that to his GF, he's just an AH for wording it needlessly rude.
@@icecreamnoodles3742Yeah, I get that. He had someone react badly to the bugs and it’s common enough to be afraid of bugs so that wouldn’t bother me as such.
His fault lies more in the fact that he’s clearly been judging her home and her interests as childish and acting as though he accepts her when he really doesn’t. People like that think they’re such saints for tolerating the “faults” in their partner, until something happens to break their silence and they show that they never really loved the other person… they just loved the bits they found acceptable and hoped the rest would go away in time.
Yeah, me and my s/o have "I love everything about you but let's tone it down so these pricks don't blow a gasket" moments all the time. Nobody's offended by it, we both fully understand the etiquette of being in the presence of "proper" people vs constant penis jokes in our own house.
Meanwhile, the bf here just jumps straight to "you're childish and my mom thinks you're an autist lol." Like, really dude? If that's the way you tell your girlfriend you don't want her to host, supposedly because of your stuck-up coworkers, then that's a mighty fine Freudian slip about how you _actually_ feel about your gf.
Story 4: OP I'm 24 and have Funko pops on the wall right now, with a Hazbin hotel placemat on my desk for all to see. People display their interests and hobbies, and the reason you've never seen a place like your gf's before is because you have never been around people that share her interest. What you describe is actually very common. If you're this embarrassed by it then maybe you shouldn't be going out with her anymore, but until you get out of your boring bubble you have no right to shame her like this.
What makes it worse he basically makes fun of her and bro it not even his apartment why dose he think he should say how it should look
9:37 : „…tells me she has an interest in ugly things, which might give us an indication why she is dating you“
Good burn Dabney🤣
The home decor sounds awesome, and OP's circle sounds like a bunch of babies. Clearly the phrase "ugly people attract ugly people" is true. To be clear, I'm talking about emotionally ugly people. The finance sector tends to attract shallow people, and this is coming from someone whose mom worked in finance.
Story 3; NTA. As a college student, I can confirm that my classes are miles easier than they were in high school because my teachers have more time to spend going in depth on topics that're tricky and my classmates are very willing to share notes if I miss a class. There's just more support because the teachers have less students and the students are out of that 'I'm better than you so haha!' phase.
We see just how useless Rslash English degree is in story 2. OP wasn't into that sort of thing and the gf essentially nag him into doing something that he didn't wanna do, but becomes emotional when he doesn't care to finish it because he didn't want to do it in the first place. Yet everyone in the post is talking about "oh but we have to read your post" which wasn't the point. But in typical reddit and rslash fashion only do selective reading and missing the point. Sure it could be handled better, but forcing someone into things they don't wanna do from the start is also terrible.
And whatever happened to “No is a complete sentence”? While I don’t agree with OP not being supportive I don’t think the gf is in the clear either. When he said no she could’ve asked any gamer friends who like the genre or recruit a beta tester.
Rslash is a simp
He has an english degree? With how often he just rewords how OP writes it, i would never think he has a degree in it. It alwaus annoys me how he just changes whar is written, if OP wanted it written like that, they would've written it like that
The girlfriend has a naturalist room with insect specimens? That's like an ideal room for me! Throw in some Edwardian furniture, dark bookcases and a cabinet of curiosities and I'd never leave!
Dark academia haven vibes. ^.^
yes, me too, i used to collect bugs specimens but my cats eats them so i can't have them, i used to have a rhino beetle specimen and a male praying mantis.
and she have a vampire squid paint? ! that's just awesome ! i will love have stickers of those things and put it in the walls and my computer
I wish I had that kind of room, it sounds like heaven tho I can't have actual insects so I draw them on the walls along with other animals as a way of having them!
@@knifetomeetyou5127 did you try to make sculptures of them? like, with clay and such, they may not be real ones but it's good enough
Yeah, if I found out someone didn’t want to use my home to entertain their friends because it had stuff like this, I’d congratulate myself for successfully deterring parasites and enjoy my well-appointed cave in peace. It sounds like a nice place except that the op apparently was okay with some of it… so clearly some portions might be a tad dull.
The last story: This behavior is absolutely coming from the grandparents...it's learned behavior.
Im so confused on story 2?
Visual Novel:
- Lasts anywhere from 2-50+ hrs
- 10k to 100k+ words?
- Morality system? (Many different dialogue choices)
- Multiple endings?
- Unknown Genre (Drama? Horror? Romance? Pornographic?)
- Required to finish it
How is that at all equal to:
Reddit post:
- 2 paragraphs
- You CHOSE to read it
- r/slash is getting PAID to read it
We dont have anywhere near enough information about the visual novel to be trashing the bf. R/slash and the top comment are just knee jerk arguements in bad faith.
Simple explanation. Rslash is a simp
Rslash is just being a dumbass again.
It happens from time to time.
Yeah, visual novels are essentially just books with some pictures, reddit posts are roughly just paragraphs.
Yeah, Rslash literally screaming insults at OP for not wanting to go through this whole thing is ridiculous.
6:49
Futurama pieces and “Weird triangle guy”? (Probably Bill Cypher)
DUDE, CAN ME AND YOUR GF BE FRIENDS??? SHE SOUNDS COOL ASF. Once I get my own place thats EXACTLY how I want it to be decorated.
That last story is going for the long con! Good on the parents since it doesn't seem that the girl really hasn't changed. I can see her helping others and working in less privileged areas could be a substitute considering the friend may be unreachable, unlikely but possible. Although it would have the same outcome.
I was thinking that. Have her birthday party but do something cheap and any gifts she gets instantly get donated to someone else. Make her work in a food kitchen or something as well. Teach that girl that she should be grateful she has what she has.
yo that woman with the 'weird' home decor sounds like the coolest woman in the world
Right? She sounds like she's out of op's league in that story
For the guy in story 4, I could understand OP if he had just said he didnt wanna invite people over because people got scared last time (especially since she pressed him for an answer) but literally everything else he said just made him look worse and worse
Calling the decor childish is what made me go nope he's a bad apple.
Story 2: rSlash coming out with the bad takes once again, how is reading a Reddit post comparable to playing 100% of a VN?
She didn’t ask him to play through the game once, she asked him about the different options, character paths, and endings. The average VN takes what, 10 hours to beat once, and depending how many endings there are she wants him to play through it all, that can be anything from 20+ hours to 60+ hours of playing a game in a genre you don’t care for, so even then his feedback won’t be worth anything because he isn’t the target audience, there are so many ways he can support her, share her game on VN forums and gaming pages, but telling me this man needs to sit through at minimum 10 hours of gameplay for a game he knows he won’t like and then comparing that to taking a minute to read a Reddit post, yeah
ESH she shouldn’t ask someone who doesn’t like VNs to play a VN for player feedback and he should support her game in other ways
There are people who get paid to play visual novels for a reason
OP wasn't the AH in the slightest, he repeatedly made it clear he didn't like VNs and wouldn't be able to give good criticism, and it's clear he's supported her through the 2 years. The gf shouldn't be emotionally blackmailing him into reading her story, which he obviously wouldn't like.
Story 3, I adore the girlfriend's decorating choices. The boyfriend is insecure and judgmental.
the girlfriend with the decor sounds awesome. I think more people SHOULD decorate their homes with their interests! It's your home! Put stuff in it! Also want to give OP (and possibly his mom) an extra AH score for the "is she autistic" comment. Because it sounds like the boyfriend and his mom think of that as a negative thing. So what if she is autistic?
Omg I was scouring through the comments to see if anyone else caught that casual ablism from ops mom and op himself, cause RSlash clearly didn't
@@delagoence3739 it was so overt. I'm really hoping op gets dump.
Because to them only autistic people can like good cartoons and tarantulas? Honestly, i think it's pretty cool. I'm afraid of spiders but a wall dedicated to beetles and bugs? Like the whole house sounds like art. i've never heard of something like this before but knowing its someone you love, wouldn't you support their interests? Hate saying it from one post, but whys she with him?
@@delagoence3739 yeah lol I definitely caught it. I'm autistic myself, so I'm unfortunately aware of such things. I don't blame RSlash for not catching it though. It's harder to notice when you're not often the victim of it
Bill cipher "weird triangle guy" pretty simple but accurate I'd say
As a fellow game developer I can symathize with the girl in the second story. She’s passonate about the game and wants people to try it amd see what they think.
But that doesn’t mean you should force others to play it, especially when they have said they aren’t interested in that type of game.
That would mean bad feedback and them not goving the game a fair chance and could lead them to be bored, like what happened in this case. If she wants feedback then the best thing to do is to look elsewhere for feedback.
I agree. I like writing. I've written 2 short stories that I shared with my eldest brother because I know he likes to read the same genres as me. I didn't offer it to my other brother because though he likes that genre, it's more movie format over books. Yes, he'd read it cause he loves me, but he would probably be bored, and I wouldn't get the proper feedback on it that I'm looking for. People creating anything should look for their target audience. A baker wouldn't have a diabetic taste test, non sugar free cakes. They will ask someone who can eat it. People can be supportive without actually being a part of what you're doing.
Yeah I felt like rslash got that one very wrong
@TescoValueMemes369 I wouldn't say very wrong but it was just sucky
@@QuayHollywoodI would say very wrong
I’m not into visual novels either, but I have dabbled
GF is essentially asking for OP
to spend 20-30 or more hours on something he doesn’t enjoy
How?
It can easily take that long to get all the endings in a visual novel game.
She’s looking for a free play tester, not just feedback
@dragonriderabens9761 oh I know that part. I'm saying that in the sense of just because they a person's SO people feel they HAVE to do something to support them, not just be a background chatacter.but again it's not very wrong its just people's bias
Story 2: I'm going to have to say NTA. OP's reasoning is understanding, and besides if the girlfriend wants a accurate response, then getting someone who doesn't like reading won't yield proper results.
It's like if the girlfriend worked hard perfecting a dessert dish and asked OP to test it and give a honest opinion. Yet the dish has pineapple in it, and OP doesn't like pineapple. No allergy he just doesn't like the taste. How can he give an accurate opinion if he can taste the food item he doesn't like?
Story 2 : I do feel like I understand OP and his reasoning for not wanting to play, but at the same time I don't like the GF is someone who is looking for an accurate response. To me, it seems like the GF has confidence issues (as seen by her asking if it was boring) and just wanted OP to show some interest in something she likes doing. Finishing it does seem like WAY to long of a task for something OP isn't interested in however.
Besides, we don't know if OP told her that she was talented and the actual game was great, for all we know OP could just tell her that they doesn't want to play their game because he's not interested and played for 15 minutes.
Im going to say 1.5 outta 5 AH for expressing their disinterest in a passion of hers for OP and calling her childish for being upset,
and 0.5 outta 5 for the GF for trying to get OP to commit to the whole game instead of a good chunk. They could have even maybe played it together to make it more interesting..
@@kagawrld9993u can't really call someone an asshole for not liking something when u do,for example my gf is heavy into minecraft and animal crossing while im heavy into king of fighters and zelda,my gf hates hard games and games that take a lot of practice and I don't care much for life simulators,so I wouldn't ask her to play a soulslike I'm making knowing she doesn't like it and vice versa,relationship or not u shouldn't seek valid feedback from someone who doesn't enjoy the genre or style of ur project
@@kidd9662 I get what you're saying, and I agree with you in the point you're making with your relationship. I wouldn't force someone to play a game like Minecraft whenever they're not into that.
I do feel like, however, its a bit different for this relationship because she did make the game. It's just nice to feel like someone is interested in something you're so passionate about, and she seems to have some confidence problems. From my perspective, she's not looking for a professional opinion, she just wants validation.
I'm going to have to agree to disagree with you because everyone views their relationship differently though. I do respect your opinion.
@@kagawrld9993 I mean yea wanting validation is understandable but if he doesn't wanna play the game he doesn't wanna play the game😂being upset is ok but u can't blame him for not putting a lot of effort into something he isn't interested in,he didn't even say It was bad he actually complemented it,it just wasn't for him
Story 2 with the genders reversed:
"NTA. You clearly stated your boundaries: you don't care for graphic novels. You stated your support for your boyfriend, even looked at the first chapter. Your boyfriend is super toxic to demand you keep reading it."
And the commenter you quoted would have a point if he had been forced by someone to read Reddit.
You need to do better, Dabney.
If Rslash thinks you can get through a VN in two hours, then he's crazy.
A decent VN can realistically take TEN TIMES as long as that to get through, especially if you aren't a big reader, and/or read slowly. He gave a go with reading her game, despite it not being a genre or medium that he enjoys, but expecting him to finish something like that is pretty unreasonable, especially given the time commitment.
And VN's may not be a genre he even likes. It would be like asking someone who doesn't like FPS games their opinion on a FPS game. NTA.
Given that he called it a “graphic novel” at the end, I’m not sure he knows what a Visual Novel is or that it is a video game.
Agree, Dabney lost me on this one. I have a suspicion that the verdict would be 0/5 if the genders were reversed 🤔
@@PawsOnTheBalcony I agree
I feel like a partner should be a little more caring when it comes to a passion project
Girlfriend in the home decor story sounds cool as heck. Reminds me of a friend. Hope she uses her good taste to upgrade boyfriends.
Heck yeah, I'd love for my apartment to be that cool
@@lmaChroma ngl I’m not totally against OP in that story, he didn’t want to invite his coworkers over because they won’t be comfortable in a place with frame bugs on the walls. He said some questionable things, sure, he sees does things as childish but he still loves her and is tolerant that he can stay there without problems.
@@lmaChromaand be honest with yourself, you would love to have framed bugs in your house? The weird fish bathroom and artwork on the walls aren’t even that out if the ordinary. But the bugs? Reallyyy?
@@mrstar3218 But given how he actually feels about the decor he A. Might never move in because of how his job relies on appearances of the employee and home or B. Move in and control how the place is decorated which could cause a problem between them. Despite being in love or deeply caring about someone being incompatible in anyway might not make a relationship work long term.
@@mrstar3218 personally? I'd love it. Remember that there are people who pursue a career in biology just to specifically become entomologists. Bugs are fascinating little creatures and can be beautiful in their own weird ways
The decor story, as soon as OP said his mom asked if his gf was autistic cause of her decorations I immediately realized where he gets it from
So, he’s not allowed to not like it, or is he not supposed to tell her when she presses him on it?
@@anonymouslyopinionated656 it's not that he doesn't like it, it's how he told her. He insulted her, called her immature, and basically agreed with his mom calling her autistic as an insult
rSlash telling us he's never played a visual novel without outright telling us he's never played a visual novel.
Don't mind him, he's just white knighting as he always does
@@SilverSight92story 4 as well
Yeah, I don't think he understands how much can go into a visual novel, I played one and took me days (hour or two each day). So how can OP give an opinion on something that he's not into?
He always white knights. Plus he started off the episode with 2 bad takes with the and then takes another in the 4th story
That whole thread was a shit show, my favorite comments were the ones calling him a hypocrite for not reading the novel but expecting Redditors to read his post, like bro, no one was forcing you to read it, you chose to read OP’s post. OP was being asked to not just read but provide analysis for the whole thing, including multiple ending and a whole bunch of stuff.
Thanks for staying true to your original self and not using AI to react to posts! You've inspired me to create my own reddit style videos and I wanted to say thank you. I'm also down to collab anytime! :)
Home decor story reminds me of that one Twitter post
“People over 18 and still using umbrellas”
The guy responds “What are we supposed to be waterproof once we are legal”
Like am I supposed to have beige minimalistic house because im an adult? A house that has none of my personality whatsoever in it…??
Yep! 👍 I have a nice lithograph (it’s real art, not a reproduction) of a pretty woman in my dining room, and I put a pink mustache on her for fun! It’s made me giggle for years! I also have large sculptures of noses I made as a teen on a cabinet in my living room. I have a giant image of Our Lady of Guadalupe hanging above the medicine cabinet in our very small bathroom. It’s all for fun! Enjoyment!
Story 2: reading a short story is not the the same as visual novel.
Speaking from experience, i love to write; it's genuinely for me to explore themes a characters, but i also find the task of reading laborious often( it's even a struggle to re read edit my own stuff). I would never subject others to read my stuff if they have no interest in it. You can't expect harry potter fan to enjoy the fault in our stars.
You're just not seeking the right audience.
I’m exactly the same. Rslash was dead wrong on this one. I’m starting to question his logic because this is the second bad call he’s made in 2 AITA vids.
@@grizzly_manbanimation8436 this is far from his second bad call he's made many more.
@grizzly_manbanimation8436 Yeah, he makes a lot of wrong calls (some ridiculously so). I'll respect his opinions, but I'll disagree and point out the flaws in them.
@@akl2k7 A lot of the time his bias shows when it involves a guy having a disagreement with a girl. And I mean some HEAVY bias.
@@kiracaroso
Yeah, in his universe guys have to share their girlfriends hobbies, or else they are buttons
Im kinda surprised rslash didn't talk about the mother in the 3story
Taking the the daughter out to ice cream, the mother is obviously encouraging this type of behavior from her rewarding her when she does something wrong.
Yeah like directly sabotaging OP?? I think I know who her favorite is
Check the update it explains why she did that
@@ecignig so sam told her mother a different story then what really happened? Is that what I read?
@@Viggyunju yeah I saw the story on another channel with updates
@@ecignig I see thank you I only watch Rslash so it's hard to keep up with things XD
Story 2: It’s not often I strongly disagree with rslash, but this is one case. As someone with adhd and a strong distaste for reading in general, it would drive me insane to finish a graphic novel to the end. My review would not be genuine to my SO.
The second story- I'd never force someone who clearly isn't interested in playing something that can be so long (Apparently it can be 20 hours for all endings in some games). I'd at least try to find someone that is interested.
My stepdaughter came stomping her way through the sitting room one evening...and crying. All I could get out of her was. 'I'm dumb, I'm thick and I'm stupid and I'm ugly. I was gobsmacked ! It turns out that it was her Father that said it...repeatedly. She was anything but that...she was a bright kid...very pretty as well. As far as I'm concerned ANYBODY who calls their own child that is the scum of the earth.
I think he's emotionally abusing her by breaking her self-esteem. Yeah, trying to powerplay by mentally breaking your own innocent kid is beyond just the "scum of the earth" territory
@@BadassHater1 there's a difference between 'breaking someone's confidence' and teaching someone humility.
Arrogance isn't healthy. It'll lose you friendships, relationships, even jobs if you're too up your own. It's important to understand what other people go through and have some perspective.
And heck, he didn't anywhere SAY that she was dumb. Merely that her sister was doing more advanced work, so a B or C isn't worse than her A.
A parent should absolutely curb that "I'm a genius, I'm better than everyone else" attitude early. It's for her own good.
Agreed. Some parents are horrible bastards to their children, all the while forgetting it's the kids who decide what nursing homes they shove and forget them in.
OP didn't call her stupid though, just showed her what her sister was dealing with.
What did you do & were is your step child now? Hope she recovered
I'm glad he threw that last line about what his mom thought... really showed where his stupidity comes from.
"It's not something a grown women should have" Says who? Hm? Huh? How does being a adult all a sudden mean they can't express themselves or their hobbies in their OWN HOME. The only way I'll be able to express myself is when i get my own place because i can't do it in my parents home!
OP is probably one of those people who think, "Only kids are allowed to have fun." Which is a bunch of bullshit.
Says her decor was "juvenile." Is just insulting.
Sixth story: NTA. I even had a record scratch here. She called that girl a golddigger, when she is the one demanding expensive gifts. Also, they will destroy her social life? Well, for how she manages it that won't be a great loss.
The home decor guy is the kind of person who thinks that all animated mediums are “childish” and therefore beneath him. Like does he think that being an adult mean that you can’t have fun?
I have to think Rslash is blind in story 2 and the top comment. The guy said he doesn’t enjoy visual novel games so why would the GF give it to him to test, that’s just bad feedback.
He’s not selfish, it’s just not his thing and she knows that. But he still tried and when she asked the response wasn’t bad, he said he’s not saying it’s bad he just doesn’t like it because he’s not into that stuff.
Like… did you even read the post?
Agreed. Imagine if the bf had her play a first-person shooter for hours on end despite it not being her genre. I'd say NTA.
And besides, Rslash's reasoning makes no sense. The OP didn't force anyone to read the post. It's generally expected that people who aren't interested in the post will just skip it. The girlfriend did make the OP spend hours reading her visual novel.
With that post, so many people focused on the not wanting to read part, even calling him illiterate and the fact he's just not interested in that genre of game.
Rslash is a white knight, he doesn't care
Well, some ones having a midlife crisis. Learn to read the room guys. Dad and his baby girlfriend need to read the room and back off.
Story 2: Uh... I would kinda be inclined more towards everyone sucks there. Let's first be clear that it's not a graphic novel, it's a VISUAL novel, which is a video game type. Those types of games are usually quite long and expansive, it's definitely more than a two hour commitment to get what she's asking. Second, we could flip this around and point out that OP set a boundary of 'I'm not into visual novels' and she pushed to ignore it. Third, like... you can be supportive of your loved one, but not share an interest, even if that interest is intersecting with work your loved one made. Plus if he doesn't like visual novels, then he doesn't play them, and if he doesn't play them, then he won't be able to provide any valuable feedback beyond what he gave from playing for fifteen minutes.
Now I will admit the OP's post is a bit tantrum-y and over the top, and crying on reddit was unnecessary because it's such a minor issue. But at the same time, if he doesn't like those kinds of games, then he doesn't like those kinds of games. Don't push your partner to do things they don't want to do. Now I don't have any romantic partners, but I have my parents and sibling, and I love them all and we all have a close relationship, but I would never ever ever ever push them to read what I write or look at my drawings or sit and hear my fictional world's lore, because I know it's not something they're interested in. Meaning they couldn't give me a fun, passionate response, just standard "well done!" type stuff. And that all takes much less time than playing a video game.
I think you all got completely hung up on his claim of not liking that much reading (and his attitude, but he could've been in a bad mood) and didn't bother to think about the situation in its entirety.
Having said all this, OP could've offered alternative ways of supporting her, but she also needed to take no as 'no'. They could've gone out to dinner, he could've treated her, if she was REALLY deadset on him playing the thing then she could, I dunno, sit with him while he plays it? So they can have it be a fun time together instead of being a chore.
I'd give maybe a soft 0.5 all around, and I don't hope she dumps him. I hope they both grow up a bit and try not to be so single-minded with each other, but that's about it.
I don't think rSlash or comments giving the wrong analysis are really worthy of an asshole score here though. More of a 'stop and think for more than 5 seconds before reflexively responding to a specific portion of the thing instead of the whole situation' score.
GF’s response is emotional blackmail
“You didn’t do what I wanted so I’m gonna ignore you”
That’s blatant emotional blackmail, especially since she trampled all over OP’s clearly set boundaries then got mad when he doubled down on them
He gave her an inch, and she tried to take a mile but he wasn’t having that so now he’s getting the cold shoulder for it
Yes, there are other ways to be supportive but we don’t really have any info on what he did/didn’t try in that regard, so not gonna judge on that front due to a lack of info
That said, she’s not asking for just feedback, she’s asking for a free play tester
That is not a reasonable expectation, period
I must say that you are really good at presenting an argument. I was leaning towards R/Slash's opinion until I read yours.
The only thing the boyfriend can be accused of is maybe insensitivity and calling his girlfriend out for being childish. Other than that he's completely in the right. Couples should support each other, but at the same time, respect each others' interest. The BF supported his GF by doing something, albeit briefly, he didn't enjoy and gave his feedback as requested. The GF did not respect the BF's interest by backing away and also emotionally blackmailed by ignoring.
R slash honestly heavily favors women and children unless there are serious Karen vibes.
@@Avermra yeah you're trying to hard and how dare you make me read all of your comments ;3
@@YuriKamado19 sorry i will do better next time to stop you from reading youtube comments that you are clearly not interested in scrolling down to review =(
Ok, I'm going to dissent on the guy who doesn't want to play the girlfriend's game. I write romance novels for a living. My husband is my BIGGEST supporter... but he doesn't read my books. He'll help me sort out some plot points, and he's helped me figure out some of the more complicated details for my suspense novels. He's a huge cheerleader for me. He literally brags to people about what I do and loves that I'm his sugar mama. He just... isn't interested in reading romance novels. And that's perfectly okay. I have beta readers and editors to give me feedback. All I want from my husband is his love and support.
If you want feedback on a project, you need feedback from someone who's actually into what you created, not someone who's reading/playing it just because you guilted them into it. They're going to go into it with a bad taste in their mouth, they're not your target audience, and their feedback won't be all that useful.
So... I disagree that the guy is a butthole here. People can be supportive of your art without actually consuming it, and badgering them into consuming it will just make them dislike it more. Also, reading a short Reddit post isn't quite the same investment of time/energy as reading an entire novel or playing an entire game. I'd be concerned if the guy was belittling her work or something. Choosing not to consume it just means they have different interests, and there's nothing wrong with that (presumably they have other common interests).
As I mentioned in a response below, if my husband has spent ages perfecting a seafood recipe, he won't get upset if I don't eat it. He knows seafood isn't my thing. No matter how proud he is of the recipe, no matter how much work he puts into it, I'm just... never going to enjoy something with fish in it. And guess what? He's 100% okay with that because he respects my likes and dislikes. And I can still be happy for him that he perfected the recipe even if I don't eat it myself!
It's not rocket science, folks.
I definitely agree with not hosting a business meeting if the things like tarantulas and gonlin sharks were in areas everyone would go to but insulting her for decorating like that is just so unnecessarily rude
Thank you I’m glad someone agrees. It’s not as if he’s demanding her to take down the things he just doesn’t want his coworkers there and was planning to skip. I love cartoons I love weird things as well, but if I had like some zoom meeting, I wouldn’t have decorations in background.
As OP story, mention presentation important in his field. We might like to wear T-shirts and a jeans, but we present ourselves differently in those environments.
Honestly yeah I agree, especially given one of his co-workers thought it was creepy
Story 2:
NTA. He tried the game and had positive feedback for her. If the girlfriend wants someone to actually review the game, she should get someone who is into the genre and can give her informed, constructive criticism. Her boyfriend is not that person. It would be like my wife bringing me a bowl of homemade blackberry cobbler and ice cream. I'd give it a taste, but I'm not eating the whole thing because I don't like blackberries. That doesn't mean I don't appreciate her work. I doesn't mean I don't love her. It just means I don't like blackberries.
Home decor OP. The girlfriend is 100% correct. It’s her house. Her decor, her interests.
And I’m curious why did OP bring the coworker over to his gfs? Has he ever brought them over to his place? He talks about how she lives in a swanky high rise but what about him? And the big display was in a bedroom. What business did they have in that room?
He didn't tell her to decorate it in another way though. He didn't like it that much and thinks it childish but don't say anything. He seems to agree with her decor and her interests being her prerogative. In the same way his interests and opinions are his prerogative.
He doesn't have to invite his friends over if he doesn't like the interior that much and his friends are the same.
Where he is the buthole is in how he said it being confrontational.
If the guy thinks it's juvenile, he's clearly never seen the background behind a standard Let's Play maker.
it's boyfriends decision to not invite friends to her house if they feel weird. HIS NAME WAS FEORGE GLOYD!!!
It actively feels like op is just bullying his girlfriend
I disagree with Story 2
he said he doesn't read that stuff, but she still pushed for it. as expected, he got bored and said he couldn't anymore. someone said that she should get bate testers AND SHE SHOULD. I have read of the family helping out and stuff but they don't have to do it its a choice and he said no thanks.
Have you read a visual novel, Rslash? They can be pretty lengthy, which is why I'm not really into them myself. People normally need minutes, not HOURS, before they know if they enjoy something and he clearly DOES NOT enjoy the genre. He told her so! He told her it's just not for him, but she pressed him and he got annoyed. Given the fact he did at least read it for a little while, he knows she did some pretty good stuff and supports her work. Frankly, he's not the target audience. The GF needs to ask around for people who do enjoy reading some visual novels and get some proper feedback.
Also, you CHOSE to read his post, as did the commenters. That "Top comment" is an absolute joke. You're comparing your CHOICE to read like 1-2 minutes of his post versus the multiple HOURS he would have to read a visual novel, going over multiple choices and endings. That's ridiculous. Do you need another vacation? I swear, you have some takes that are seriously off.
Damn
It’s way more about supporting your significant others passion project because you aren’t into it and got bored. That’s selfish. It’s about him only spending 15 minutes on his partners passion project then the format not being his taste. Just disrespectful and rude, she clearly wants her partner to experience something she spent two years on.
@@hannahfreckles247 Okay, first off: Something about your choice of words is not making partial sense to me.
Next, let's recall something here. She wants him to experience the entire thing, however long that is, in a genre he's not fond of. She KNOWS this and still expects him to go through it? Nah. OP set a boundary when he initially declined before deciding to break it and read the visual novel for 15 mins. OP told her he wasn't intent on reading any further as it's not helpful to his GF. She pushed for him to do more when she should've left him alone and find a tester with an interest in reading visual novels. She should've respected his boundaries.
You can show support without having to partake in the product your partner made or their various hobbies. Many comments on this video share that view. If something's not for you, it's not for you. It doesn't mean you can't show support some other way.
@@hannahfreckles247it isn't disrespectful in the least. My gf doesn't enjoy reading stories and I've written four of them. I've never tried to force her or guilt her into reading any of them. I have friends who enjoy reading and writing for that. She does however enjoy takes my shitty art for the stories and improving them. You just have shitty relationship expectations.
@@S4intINS4N3 no no no it’s it’s about the giving up after 15 minutes and his attitude. Y’all just too chronically online to even experience dating so I’m not surprised you can’t understand why he’s such an asshole
The "Pay for it" story: I need to break it to you rSlash, "doormats" WOULD pass it along. Because if they didn't THEY would "hear about it" when they got home. Of course OP is NTA, but he could have handled the whole thing better. He knew she was having a rough time and chose to say he'd charge her anyway. What he should have said was "I'm sorry, but the way your boyfriend acted, by expecting me to pay for 2 days when I've helped you out for over a year, has made me really uncomfortable. At least for now I'm no longer comfortable giving you a ride to work, as I don't know what he'll do next." Or something like that. OP did not have to take out his frustration at her boyfriend on her.
Ya, that was a really bad take.
Id like to point out visual novels can be easily 8 hour's long to complete all the routes, and if you dont like the style of game then its just 8 hour's of not enjoying it
It's not about him though. It's about giving feedback to the woman he claims to love ...
When my now wife was working on her bachelor's thesis, I was helping her format it properly and read it as least twice for spell check and such things, putting a total of at least 30h into helping her make it as best as she could.
It's in a field I have no clue about and a topic I couldn't care less about. But it's the woman I love. So who cares whether it was actually fun to do? (spoiler: it wasn't)
@@brag0001and that’s cool that you did that for her but the Op cares . My girlfriend likes to write romance novels and she knows they’re not my thing and not once has she forced me to read them. She’s asked me and I tried but I can’t get into it and she respects it. I love to play video games but she’s not into that but she’s tried to play with me before and it just wasn’t her thing. You can still support someone without having to make them do something they don’t want
Bingo. And a person who doesn't like the genre will not be able to give effective feedback about her game which clearly she wanted to know. The expectation of good feedback from a person who does not enjoy the genre is unfair.
Finally someone says it!
That's exactly what I was thinking. Trying to force someone to do something that they can't enjoy and aren't motivated for is going to make them more upset. While I understand her wanting him to check it out, he's not going to give her the feedback she wants. He can't look at it and be like, 'Yes, I see this and that, I think blank was really good'. He can see the time and effort and appreciate it, but he frankly will not care about the writing or how good it is ect. He won't have the feedback she needs. It's like forcing someone to watch a movie you like or play a game you like but they aren't into. It doesn't matter if you made it, if it's not their thing it isn't their thing. If you aren't interested in it, forcing yourself to sit through something you don't have the motivation for will not do you any favors.
The GF Decor story:
At the end of the day, OP has a right to his opinion, and i wanna point out SHE'S the one who kept pushing to let her host when he was fine with skipping his turn. As cool as she sounds, not everyone is gonna like what you like so let him be.
Yeah that's what I think no one's really a jerk here. And remember this isn't just the boyfriend's opinion both his mom and a co-worker were put off by his girlfriend's decor. Also yeah she's not the employee there. If she was the employee then okay she is free to host the party there decorations be damned and who knows maybe some people would find it cool, but you know what she's not the employee her boyfriend is and if he's not comfortable with it that's his choice.
Home decor.
That woman is living my dream! Glad to see I don't need my personal biases to say it's her pace and she did nothing wrong at all.
I love when adults brag about how grown up they are because they don't like cartoons or whatever. I'm a 50 year old grandmother who still watches SpongeBob and eats Count Chocula. If the grandkids happen to be there, they join me.
"My mom even asked if my girlfriend was autistic after seeing the apartment." So?! What does your girlfriend possibly being autistic have to do with anything? And even if she was, the girlfriend shouldn't have to mask in her own home. I honestly hope she breaks up with him.
Visual Novel Game: As someone who plays games quite abit (including visual novels). This is not simply about “supporting the gf”. If OP does not like that game style he cannot get into the game meaning she will not get a good opinion. And in a way she is using the “im your gf card” to get him to do something *she knows* he does not like. So yeah nah dude is not the AH.
Home decour: eh everyone is allowed to decorate as they like. However, she cannot get mad Op does not want to bring people over when
1) her decour is not inviting to others
2) he is in a field where appearance matters
7:01 ‘weird triangle guy’ is definitely bill cypher 😭
Story 2: I mean, maybe he wasn't as supportive as he could've been, but if it isn't his type of game, then he shouldn't be forced to play it. It isn't everyone's cup of tea, it shouldn't be that big of a deal
Exactly what I said! I hate eggs over easy or sunny side up you give me the fanciest dish that deserves to be served in a Michelin Star restaurant, I'm going to say no thank you because runny eggs aren't my thing
@@charlesmaxey89rslash is a misandrist if it wasnt already obvious
@charlesmaxey9342 That's not the same thing, OP's gf didn't make this game for OP, she made it as a passion project and wanted him to try it out and be supportive of her. She didn't try to ignore his preferences. If your partner was a chef and made a dish they were really proud of that they put a ton of work into and you won't eat it just because you don't like some of the ingredients then you're the ahole.
@@marinonightingale he's an a-hole for not at least putting in an hour or so of time to her work, yes but, asking him a do a complete play through of her game to give feedback is an a hole move when he said he didn't enjoy those types of games. Everyone sucks here.
@@marinonightingaleI think it's ESH. OP was being mean and rude, but expecting someone to play the ENTIRE game when visual novels can be as long as 60-100 hour RPGs and he dislikes the genre is silly and equally rude. She could have loaded up some key moments she wanted feedback on and he could have sucked it up and played them for her. Easy compromise.
2nd story: honestly, I think the GF is stupid for asking OP who is not into reading, to test it and then get upset that he doesn't like it. He is just not the target she should look for. It's like asking someone, who isn't at all into fantasy, to play D&D or a toddler to play Outlast and then be suprised they don't like it
I extremly disagree with the bad boyfriend thing, yo uhave no idea how long a visual novel is whats gonna come out of finnishing it except him saying it's boring as hell if he's not enjoying it. Comparing reading 13 lines to something that long is stupid.
Story 2: Jesus, Rslash, get a clue here. The boyfriend has made it politely clear to their gf that they are not the target audience of this game and, therefore, not the right person to judge. And she's turning that into him being "unsupportive"? Give me an effing break. I'm into star wars and my gf isn't at all. So why should I expect her to judge if I make a Star Wars ttrpg campaign?
Op's only crime was not suggesting better people they know to try it instead. They were supportive, even giving positive feedback.
NTAH, the gf needs to recognise the target audience before she tries publishing that game. And you, Rslash, need to realise that supporting your significant other doesn't always mean having to give feedback on everything they do. Seriously. This WASN'T something OP could judge accurately and, therefore, wasn't the ah for pointing this out.
Yes, thank you
Yes! I was confused with his take on this one and op nta.
Yeah, imagine if a guy helped make a first-person shooter and his girlfriend wasn't into those kinds of games. She then played about 15 minutes of the 10-hour campaign or multiplayer to be supportive, but the boyfriend wanted her to finish it even though she wasn't into that type of game. I can guarantee RSlash would be siding with the girlfriend in this scenario.
OP is NTA. He gave it a fair shot, even though it wasn't his type of game. Besides, how do we know it's only 2 hours? And how do we know she won't make him play it more to see the choices play out?
@@akl2k7 visual novels can take as long as 20 hours to get every single possible ending. So it’s not surprising OP doesn’t want to finish it. Rslash was dead wrong on this one.
The really messed up part is that rslash and the people on the post seem to only want to focus on him not wanting to read. Even getting to the point of people calling him illiterate.
I would like to point out that a majority of adults these days do have “Childish” decor in their own homes because they’re not afraid to display who they are. I can already tell that the Op from that post will try to control the decor if he moves in with her.
I'm in my fifties and most of the people that I know have more than a few "childish" decorations in their home. My next door neighbour has a shrine to his favorite hockey team which takes up several rooms. My best friend likes old technology and has old weird scientific equipment all around his house. My wife loves Snoopy, so we have Snoopy decorations all over the house. I think you're right about him trying to take control if he moves in.
Story 4, it's one thing to say "hey, in my field everyone is focused on image and even though it sucks, your place doesn't present that image". But no, OP himself is judging his gf and uses the word "juvenile" multiple times. F that guy, girlfriend deserves better.
7:45 the girlfriend’s flat sounds AMAZING!!!
Right? She Sounds Like she is neurodivergent and has super specific Special interests and it's so cool... But OP does Not Like her "quirky" showing
Story 2 : NTA, your partner isn’t your publisher, your partner isn’t your proofreader. Your partner must support you but they don’t have to work for you. It’s as simple has that.
Plus those games can take up to 8 hours and if for 8 hours op isn't having fun then he wouldn't be able to give good feedback
the best way be get a truthful reaction is to have someone you don't have a connection with test it, gf is looking for validation through her connect to op or is just being lazy to find the right tester
Nah. The boyfriend is a big snob.
@@dudeorduuude5211 I enjoy visual novels but it's not for everyone. It's like baked sweets, some people just don't like sweets no matter who baked them.
@@dudeorduuude5211 Have you ever played a visual novel? Are you a big VN fan? If not, kindly be quiet. If you have, you should understand forcing someone to sit through a minimum of 4 hours (on the absolute low end) of what would essentially be nails on a chalkboard to them is entirely unreasonable. Would you drag someone who can't stand horror movies to a Nightmare on Elm Street marathon?
2nd story: You're comparing spending literally 1 minute of reading vs hours upon hours of reading for a type of game OP, and the vast majority of gamers, does not like. Visual Novels are extremely niche and you'd be hard pressed to find ANYONE willing to go farther than 15 to 30 minutes into one of those games without them being either a massive fan of the genre, or an avid reader. Or if it's "My Pig Princess" by CyanCapsule. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Agreed. It would be like him making her play a first-person shooter when she doesn't like those. And then making her play the whole campaign when she's still not into it. NTA
And nobody forced, nor even asked rSlash to read the reddit post lol
@@maagi1 agreed, he be a-hole there for sure
Exactly
I love vns but it took me a while to get into them
RSlash, you missed the entire point on the 2nd story. OP's trying & failing to adequately say that he can't give her constructive feedback, & it will only hurt her feelings, because the 2 main concepts of her game's genre is precisely what he dislikes about that genre. She'll want answers he can't give her (there's no common ground). To even ask him for his opinion is setting herself up to have her feelings hurt, & she's responsible for hurting them. He's acknowledging the truth about himself upfront, & how it won't be beneficial to her at all to push him for more. She's disregarding him, getting her feelings hurt (as predicted, despite trying to avoid that very thing), & trying to blame him for the hurt feelings she caused herself - she's acting entitled & unfair towards OP.
PS. Hope you like humble pie, it's d-bag flavored. Apply the guys scenario to you & your wife. Have you ever spared her feelings, even at the cost of making yourself look bad? That's what OP is trying to do. So neither of you are actually d-bags, just wanting to spare your SO hurt feelings.
yep there is only really 2 posiblities
1: He lies and says "its great", she gets upset because its obvious he doesn't actualy like it.
2: He tells the truth "i don't like it", she gets upset because he doesn't like it.
Exactly
@@stevenscott2718 You're exactly right! I was afraid no one would understand what I was trying to say & mean. I feel better since you & the other person commented to show you comprehended my meaning.
I mean. I've written and self published 8 full length novels over the last 10 years. My wife of 19 years hasn't read any of them. Doesn't mean she's not supportive of my writing, just means she's not into the kind of fiction I write. I'd love to get her feedback, but if she's not into the subject matter how can she give me a realistic review?
reminds of the scene from DS9 where Wayoun ask Kira if the painting he has been given is any good, and Kira gets a little bit snotty because her friend painteded it, And his responce is "no i have no idea if this is good or not, art apreciation hasn't been programed into me."
The girl with the cool ass decor: if you don't want her I'll take her~
Eta: i have a friend with a wet specimen shark and i got super excited when i saw it
Every time I hear about The Home decor lady, I get so mad on her behalf. She sounds rad as hell! Homes *should* be a reflection of those who live in them. It's fun to see the personality of those you love reflected in their space. My step-dad was a huge Angry birds fan, so his office had them. My favorite boss was a Dallas Cowboys fan and put up little silver stars at his desk and signed memorabilia. I couldn't care less about either of those things, but like they make me smile in connection to people I care about--And those were a weird family relation and a beloved work colleague at their work areas.
Why OP can't wrap his head around how cool his girlfriend is, and just let go the part he doesn't get are beyond me. I would give some grace to someone with a proper phobia of spiders some grace in the situation, but that's something that can be managed. If I was willing to host and someone gave me grief for my abundance of anime and video game memorabilia, I would never invite them back because they were bad guests. And if were OP's girlfriend, I'd kick the loser out. He doesn't seem to like her very much based on how he describes her interests and passions.
Triangle guy? Bill Cipher? Gravity falls?
Story #2: Her apartment sounds so interesting. Good for her for doing her own thing. I love it. The GF might be neurotypical and decorated based on her special interest. OP is the AH. He doesn't need to police her interests.
That's story 4. And did you mean to say OP's GF might be nuerodivergent?
@@andredunbar3773i think that's what they think
It’s the 4th story bud
@@andredunbar3773yeah I think that’s what OP meant, just got the wrong term by the looks of things!
And I’m autistic and have gas masks, animal skulls, and Celtic art around my home, why? Because I love gas masks and think they’re cool and have a whole cabinet of them on display (like some from WWII), the animal skulls because I think they’re beautiful in their own way, and the Celtic art is because I’m Gaelic Scottish and my niche interest in Neolithic, Pictish and Gaelic history, as in I have travelled all around my country to visit various old carved stones/stone circles/cairns to document them, so I have Celtic/Pictish art around my home.
Is it a strange mix? Absolutely. Would I care if someone judged me for my neurodivergent interests and ways? Lmao no, you just won’t be invited to my home ever again!
Neurodivergent*
Last story: when OP mentioned the in-laws wanting to fund the girl's sweet16 party, i knew it, i discovered where she got the entitled and spoiled atitude from
4:37 graphic novels, not the same as visual novel, I’m afraid
To be fair to OP in the visual novel story, the gf isn't gonna get great feedback from someone who doesn't enjoy the genre. If you arent into visual novels, they're gonna be long and boring.
"Weird triangle guy" How dare they disrespect Bill Cypher
Lmao, that was my first thought!
"Some weird triangle guy."
"Gravity Falls. That's Bill."
Crazy
Stolen comment alert
@@idk2167not really. The other comment is more recent
Fucking a