28:33 he just reminded me of times when I feel the loneliest and unloved. When I catch ppl that I'm trying to express how I feel to ignoring me but senselessly nodding or acting like they are listening but say ummhumm or go quite when I say something that needs feedback. Omg, 😭. It's the worst feeling ever. Reasons I isolate and have been isolated for 5+ years now.
The feeling of losing anyone I love is what makes my chest hurt physically so I just don't let ppl get close but then if I don't keep myself distracted that sense of loneliness will come over me in the form self hating and sadness.
God I can relate so much with Xannie’s struggles. Don’t know why but every break up I’ve been through has felt like the death of a family member and the delusions and loneliness that come with it hurt to the point where you actually feel like there is a literal hole in your heart and every breath feels heavier and heavier. Sometimes I even get paranoid that I might die of a cardiac arrest if that feeling keeps persisting. Thankfully, my neurologist disagrees which gives me hope.
My loneliness getting to a point where it is very painful. I spent Christmas alone for the 7th year in a row, even though my son and his family live in the next town. Some excuse about my daughter-in-law having a cold and he didn't want to bring the germs with him when he visited. I would rather have caught a cold than spend Christmas alone again this year.
Loneliness is a huge thing for me. Loneliness for me means having no friends. I think I'm capable of friends. I don't know really how it got this way. Maybe next year it'll go better. I don't know. ....And wow, I can really relate to what Xannie said around the 10 minute mark.
Imagine coloring a picture on white paper…..now Hide the bright colors and color the picture with the white crayon on the white paper…that’s the best way I can explain the emptyness
Again, I completely relate to Xannie when it comes to the link between identity and loneliness - something I'm going through right at this moment. This video had such impeccable timing - I just went and joined the besties on pateon lol.
28:33 he just reminded me of times when I feel the loneliest and unloved. When I catch ppl that I'm trying to express how I feel to ignoring me but senselessly nodding or acting like they are listening but say ummhumm or go quite when I say something that needs feedback. Omg, 😭. It's the worst feeling ever. Reasons I isolate and have been isolated for 5+ years now.
The feeling of losing anyone I love is what makes my chest hurt physically so I just don't let ppl get close but then if I don't keep myself distracted that sense of loneliness will come over me in the form self hating and sadness.
God I can relate so much with Xannie’s struggles. Don’t know why but every break up I’ve been through has felt like the death of a family member and the delusions and loneliness that come with it hurt to the point where you actually feel like there is a literal hole in your heart and every breath feels heavier and heavier. Sometimes I even get paranoid that I might die of a cardiac arrest if that feeling keeps persisting. Thankfully, my neurologist disagrees which gives me hope.
Thank you so much for this channel, it gives me hope :)
My loneliness getting to a point where it is very painful. I spent Christmas alone for the 7th year in a row, even though my son and his family live in the next town. Some excuse about my daughter-in-law having a cold and he didn't want to bring the germs with him when he visited. I would rather have caught a cold than spend Christmas alone again this year.
🫂
47. I relate more to you guys than anyone in my world. Thank you for this. Thank you
Loneliness is a huge thing for me. Loneliness for me means having no friends. I think I'm capable of friends. I don't know really how it got this way. Maybe next year it'll go better. I don't know. ....And wow, I can really relate to what Xannie said around the 10 minute mark.
@@BoolaBear your skiing videos are sooo cool man! Wish I had the company of mountains too. Regards from a borderline Slackliner :)
Imagine coloring a picture on white paper…..now Hide the bright colors and color the picture with the white crayon on the white paper…that’s the best way I can explain the emptyness
Again, I completely relate to Xannie when it comes to the link between identity and loneliness - something I'm going through right at this moment. This video had such impeccable timing - I just went and joined the besties on pateon lol.
Super excited to have you!!
Thank you Xannie, Jack, Hak Ja and Madhurima
I connect with my aunts via call and speak to them, visit friends frequently, chat with close friends on a daily basis...
thank you guys for this episode. The pink christmas look is so cool Xannie!!
Hi, looking to add anyone else to your bunch. I’m from Brisbane Australia. I was diagnosed with BPD at 19 and have a lot of insight.
We are not looking to add cast members for the foreseeable future, however if you’re interested in being a guest you can email xannie@thebpdbunch.com