#1) reorganization of priorities values or desires #2) moral disengagement #3) grows distant #4) secrecy #5) criticism #6) external validation #7) the decision to act #8) changed perception of the relationship #9) more reactive to small triggers #10) self deception #11) momentary relief.
Yes, correctly spoken,just needed the speaker to iterate the lesson. I have watched this progression with my own eyes and most all men are TOTALLY ALMOST ALL THE EXACT SAME THEY TOTALLY ARE💯 I don’t see any that aren’t 💯 God sees all our hearts and even the ones who don’t speak I see.
It all boils down to a deep seated need for constant attention. A quick "fix" or an emotional "high" That's why they can't stay with one person for too long.
I knew my Ex was cheating on me from the very beginning. We had been together for 30 years, and I know he never loved me, he never really cared, there was only dead air time. I ignored ALL the red flags all the warnings, it was my fault and I own it.
I think my dad set my relationship up and it was just for a time.... The days go by for us all.... If you're lucky enough you'll find someone to grow with.... Maybe for awhile maybe for a short time and maybe forever.......❤❤❤❤
This video is so spot on and depicts exactly how it all went down. Mine was constantly seeking attn from women. He would swear it was just bc he grew up with 2 sisters and mom without dad around and that women understood his mushy side more. But in reality 90% of the ones he spoke to he would, he would consider dating if they happened to be interested. I would often write it off to keep peace but honestly sorry now that I didn't just end it very early on bc all I've walked away with a 2.5 years less of my life which can never be replaced and psychological issues from being treated like shit. Now I'll lose more time in healing. He's happily ever after with someone from his past until she learns the same horrible nightmare then he'll we on to another and another. It should be a crime to emotionally terrorize people. Actually much of the way he treated me falls under the category of domestic violence and I've put him in jail once before but dropped charges big mistake. He deserves to rot in jail for the rest of his life after what he's put several women through.
My ex justified his cheating and bad behavior. He excused it away as if he had a good reason for his betrayal. His behavior was disrespectful to me and our daughter. The day he left I had the locks changed, hired a lawyer and found a therapist to understand why I accepted his bad behavior.
May those who have betrayed learn to walk the path of self-forgiveness. May they come full circle and receive forgiveness from those they have betrayed. God grant that all those harmed by betrayal be fully redeemed and realize a total healing of heart, mind and soul. May they come to full knowledge that He who was sent to salvage broken and weary-laden souls has suffered the bitter taste of betrayal and somehow found a way to love again. That is what I place my hope in. He suffered so I don’t have to. Thank you Jesus. King of kings. In you, I place my trust.
I think that these signs are signs of either a male or female being true to their internal self's, the problem I have with betrayal is people who are cowards and can't tell you they are dissatisfied and take off like cowards...THAT IS BETRAYL
My ex began criticizing me unrelentlessly. He seemed bothered that I was educated, successful & I loved God. I didn't boast about anything. In hindsight, I'm glad he left. He said he was Christian but he was a drug & porn addict. He refused to address these issues.
Very enlightening and truthful! Tha painful facts present a systematic analogy of the deep destructive effects caused by betrayal! Good luck to me, Sir, I hope I make the best wise decision regarding my case. I am the betrayed party, and I face a long journey to healing and transformation without my husband, the betrayor.
Wow you just described what my 23 year x husband and the love of my life abrupt and totally unexpected ending our marriage i really am interested in more information about this
I think a lot of people man or woman view life as a chess game! Every moves is what is gained and if it’s betrayal it is a lot of maneuvers and justifications
If someone betrays you that is what they meant to do from the beginning. I don’t think all of sudden they just do it. It was already planned. That is a narsacist. It’s who they are.
I second that plea to The Lord and I pray for your Husband to focus on Jesus and the instructions He shared In relationship. First Jesus devulges The Way Man is to behave clear precise instruction (manual) Lead role, Putting his wife ahead of him self, always the shield and provides her with security honor and attention and This is what comes 1st or nothing will function correctly for him or her. She sees Him doing these instructions and her care,help,and attentions are abundantly provided Joyfully and so on etc.. read all about it. It is all given for us to understand how to carry out support and success together.
My husband has been cheating on me for 40 years. Basically, from the beginning of our marriage plus the two years we dated. I just recently found out about his infidelity, and it has broken my heart. On top of that, my husband has physically and verbally and emotionally abused me throughout our entire relationship. I have developed many serious health issues throughout the last few years, and I am 100% reliant on his health insurance. He claims he is a changed man and has proceeded to "love bomb" me. I don't believe him or trust him. But, I feel so trapped and alone. His abuse and betrayal have left me in a desperate and anxious state. How can someone be so filled with self entitlement? I've been his punching bag for 42 years in total. He took advantage of me because I was naive and succeeded by isolating me from my loved ones.
Yes wow he is still in denial been divorced now since 2013 he has never apologized for betrayal only he has said he never meant to hurt me and yes he blamed it on me basically oh my thank you so very much
NEVER EVER their fault, they rarely own up to their betrayal. Cut your loss and just let it go, you don't need that acknowledgement, because you trust in your own mentality and you know what you know in your heart and spirit. Just leap forward and live happily ever after 💐
Now I understand his sudden behaviour. But I listened to my heart and left to protect myself from his new mental abuse. Karma is taking him though and that is how life goes.
My father was and is a habitual cheater I never even wondered about how he feels about himself as he has never shown even a little of remorse or apologize he is never wrong and never heard him say sorry about anything does this mean he has no emotions or feelings etc ???
😢😢O, dear professor, how can a woman accept that in her lifetime all it was such a lie? Starting with a parental home so far away...and yet looking at the blue sky full of white cotton clouds after a Summer rain can bring an immense joy. 2 days ago I did listen and watch these heartbreaking videos at yutube and suddenly I felt such a heart pain, brief but strong, ...was that a little heart attack?, out of the sadness. Forgiving is more easy that forgetting. How do I do that?😮😮
I divorced closely 3 years ago and I am also guilty of betrayal that began when I felt unloved. It was like a charade. When the marriage and family broke down I felt I had nothing but my children and I met the Lord. He gave us new lives, therefore, I no longer feel resentment against my Ex.
You don't need to forget the betrayals done to you. The more I look at the root cause of a betrayal it becomes less necessary to keep carrying it. It fades away. I understand that the betrayal wasn't about me at all. I can change my perception of the betrayal taking accountability for my reaction to it. The hard part for me is the growth of myself from the entire process. I want to play victim/place blame instead of realizing that who I truly am as a person is still a strong, independent, loving soul. That I don't need to diminish that because of someone else actions of betrayals. That I don't need to make myself smaller that I can make myself better. A better me is a better world. ❤
Don’t try to forget, in a way you can’t. The best you can do is just accept what has happened and then focus on being who you want to be. The memory will fade the more you become you.
Add to all this a mother in law who has enmeshed her son, and talks to him every day seeding and fertilising her hatred of his wife under the guise of he's too good for her and deserves better.
@TheresaAlvarado-e3v yep. There's some dreadful women out there. My mil told my husband that I was irresponsible for having our fourth child. That was AFTER she'd talked him out of a vasectomy based on he might want to marry another woman who wanted to have a child.
All so very true my husband of 36 years who passed in'22 did the final act of betrayal he left all his investments to one of our 4 children unbeknownst to myself he experienced incest and physical abuse as a child I knew of this but learned only after his death he was hiding he had Madonna syndrome where once we married our sex life eventually became non existent I always thought it was due to his sister incest and mother both once true but it was a total shock to learn he was affected by such a horrible disorder where they love they can't desire it doesn't show up until they commit to the relationship thank you for helping me to learn further understanding
My ex changed the day we married. On that day, he thought he had a license to treat me badly and I had to just take it. Nothing I did was ever good enough. After 20 years I got a job out of town, separated my finances into an S corp. I finally asked for a discussion. Instead of asking me what I wanted to dicuss, he says "This again". I said never mind, packed and left. Texted him divorce papers two days later. To say he was shocked is an understatement. You left your wife to live on her own. What did you expect?
You could also apply these behavioral traits to mental patients; i.e., frontal lobe dementia and Alzheimer's disease for instance! So be careful as to how or to whom you apply these traits and where they are coming from! You need to have more info which might even eventually require a brain scan so don't jump immediately to the idea that the person is nefarious or getting ready to bail on you!
I’m the third party. Nothing is mentioned about the betrayal of his lies that he was leaving her. I’m suffering as well. She was emotionally detached from him and that why he cheated on her.
That’s what he told you! I bet if you asked the wife, she would give you a totally different version!!! loverboy just gave you what he wanted you to know and that’s it. Being the third person is truly disgusting.
Why is it never discussed that the connections he makes outside of the marriage may be very real and close, closer than the two in the marriage? Always it is assumed that the marriage is true love that he had betrayed when the reality is that marriage is complicated and occurs earlier in a very long lifespan
This is exactly what betrayal in the context of marriage is: Making very real and close/r connections outside of his/her marriage; which is supposee to be a covenant relationship, which includes in principle forsaking all others, while faithfully cleaving; from the inception of the marriage to his/her spouse; this until death parts.
When people leave their marriages to get closer to the opposite sex, of course they'll fall in line because you see and talk to this person more often. After a while, you'll understand if this true love/connection seems closer than the marriage. Most times it never is and they live with regret when the person they thought would replace their spouse wasn't it at all.
When a person is going down that road they vilinize their partner and forget all the good to appease their guilty conscience, you can't believe anyone looking outside their spouse , why they'll do it to you .
Done. Over it. He thought i needed him. No! Hes had to live with his mommy off and on since chikdhood. Me, ive been on my own literally since i was 6,7,8 all the way until i graduated high school. In the 4 years i lived eithbkynsister she neve4 once stopped by, cslled on holidays, never on my birthdays, never took me clothes shopping. She wanted me outiv3 forgiven her for over thr last 37 plus years. I lve aftslly n3ver felt close to him. And he was oushknf so hard 😢me to marry me. Im so 5hsnkful i didnt fall and stay in thst m3ntsl war faremental yraps.
#1) reorganization of priorities values or desires
#2) moral disengagement
#3) grows distant
#4) secrecy
#5) criticism
#6) external validation
#7) the decision to act
#8) changed perception of the relationship
#9) more reactive to small triggers
#10) self deception
#11) momentary relief.
Thank you ,for the analogy of both the betrayer and the betrayed.
What got to me was no need to ask forgiveness
Yes, correctly spoken,just needed the speaker to iterate the lesson. I have watched this progression with my own eyes and most all men are TOTALLY ALMOST ALL THE EXACT SAME THEY TOTALLY ARE💯
I don’t see any that aren’t 💯
God sees all our hearts and even the ones who don’t speak I see.
It all boils down to a deep seated need for constant attention. A quick "fix" or an emotional "high" That's why they can't stay with one person for too long.
I knew my Ex was cheating on me from the very beginning. We had been together for 30 years, and I know he never loved me, he never really cared, there was only dead air time. I ignored ALL the red flags all the warnings, it was my fault and I own it.
It isn't your fault. You betrayed no one, he did.
Love is blind. No reason to blame yourself for what he did.
Some people just take advantage of the fact that we all need love in our lives.
My husband was never fully invested from day one. He claim he was and used to words I love you, but his actions rarely if ever prove it.
Right I been betrayed from day one there was never loyalty to me anyway I was betrayed the day I ran across him
Profound and comprehensive!
After all is said & done… It all speaks of selfishness on the part of the betrayer
I think my dad set my relationship up and it was just for a time.... The days go by for us all.... If you're lucky enough you'll find someone to grow with.... Maybe for awhile maybe for a short time and maybe forever.......❤❤❤❤
This video is so spot on and depicts exactly how it all went down. Mine was constantly seeking attn from women. He would swear it was just bc he grew up with 2 sisters and mom without dad around and that women understood his mushy side more. But in reality 90% of the ones he spoke to he would, he would consider dating if they happened to be interested. I would often write it off to keep peace but honestly sorry now that I didn't just end it very early on bc all I've walked away with a 2.5 years less of my life which can never be replaced and psychological issues from being treated like shit. Now I'll lose more time in healing. He's happily ever after with someone from his past until she learns the same horrible nightmare then he'll we on to another and another. It should be a crime to emotionally terrorize people. Actually much of the way he treated me falls under the category of domestic violence and I've put him in jail once before but dropped charges big mistake. He deserves to rot in jail for the rest of his life after what he's put several women through.
My ex justified his cheating and bad behavior. He excused it away as if he had a good reason for his betrayal. His behavior was disrespectful to me and our daughter. The day he left I had the locks changed, hired a lawyer and found a therapist to understand why I accepted his bad behavior.
Thank you so much for this video!!!!!!
May those who have betrayed learn to walk the path of self-forgiveness. May they come full circle and receive forgiveness from those they have betrayed. God grant that all those harmed by betrayal be fully redeemed and realize a total healing of heart, mind and soul. May they come to full knowledge that He who was sent to salvage broken and weary-laden souls has suffered the bitter taste of betrayal and somehow found a way to love again. That is what I place my hope in. He suffered so I don’t have to. Thank you Jesus. King of kings. In you, I place my trust.
beautiful prayer 🙏
Amen 🙏 ❤ 🙏
Rejection=protection from above.
Betrayal is never a good sign 🛑.
Once a cheater always a cheater 💔
So true!!!
I'm a polygamist 😂
I think that these signs are signs of either a male or female being true to their internal self's, the problem I have with betrayal is people who are cowards and can't tell you they are dissatisfied and take off like cowards...THAT IS BETRAYL
And yet, there are plusses in everything.
Especially when you raise with them they seem dissatisfied, and they tell you off for ‘taking things too seriously’/ ‘expecting too much’.
Wow, it’s like I am hearing a script of my destroyed marriage.
The same ❤😔
Same
My ex began criticizing me unrelentlessly. He seemed bothered that I was educated, successful & I loved God. I didn't boast about anything. In hindsight, I'm glad he left. He said he was Christian but he was a drug & porn addict. He refused to address these issues.
Wow, your statement reads as if I wrote it myself.
Lose the ex and stop feeling sorry for yourself...chances are you aren't normal you are inbred like peterson!1
Same but mine believe a different religion
Your integrity aggravated his inner demons.
Well Christians are often hypocrites
Once bitten , twice shy 😱💔
What can I say you already said everything I’m speechless ❤️💔🤥🥵
Very enlightening and truthful! Tha painful facts present a systematic analogy of the deep destructive effects caused by betrayal! Good luck to me, Sir, I hope I make the best wise decision regarding my case. I am the betrayed party, and I face a long journey to healing and transformation without my husband, the betrayor.
Thank you. This is the best explanation I've seen for both sides, it's spot on.
Again...Thankyou 💎💎💎
Wow you just described what my 23 year x husband and the love of my life abrupt and totally unexpected ending our marriage i really am interested in more information about this
I am sorry to hear this. I hope you find happiness
watch the Disrespect video he has.
I think a lot of people man or woman view life as a chess game! Every moves is what is gained and if it’s betrayal it is a lot of maneuvers and justifications
Thank you for this great and true video🙏
Some of these cheaters parents have failed to bring these men up in high morals and values.They are selfish and self centered.Immature.
His behavior rests only on his shoulders.
I remember the day our marriage failed it was the day he took my photo from his wallet . From there he carried out his plans to betray me.
If someone betrays you that is what they meant to do from the beginning. I don’t think all of sudden they just do it. It was already planned. That is a narsacist. It’s who they are.
Powerful . Lord please help me to forgive my ex husband for his betrayal. Lord please help me and him too.
I second that plea to The Lord and I pray for your Husband to focus on Jesus and the instructions He shared In relationship. First Jesus devulges The Way Man is to behave clear precise instruction (manual) Lead role, Putting his wife ahead of him self, always the shield and provides her with security honor and attention and This is what comes 1st or nothing will function correctly for him or her. She sees Him doing these instructions and her care,help,and attentions are abundantly provided Joyfully and so on etc.. read all about it. It is all given for us to understand how to carry out support and success together.
Ain’t nothing the Lord is gonna do. The only thing you can do is leave his sorry butt!!!
@@Gotoworkkkyup, as they say, let go or get dragged
Huh?
@ lol
My husband has been cheating on me for 40 years. Basically, from the beginning of our marriage plus the two years we dated. I just recently found out about his infidelity, and it has broken my heart. On top of that, my husband has physically and verbally and emotionally abused me throughout our entire relationship. I have developed many serious health issues throughout the last few years, and I am 100% reliant on his health insurance. He claims he is a changed man and has proceeded to "love bomb" me. I don't believe him or trust him. But, I feel so trapped and alone. His abuse and betrayal have left me in a desperate and anxious state. How can someone be so filled with self entitlement? I've been his punching bag for 42 years in total. He took advantage of me because I was naive and succeeded by isolating me from my loved ones.
He lost respect you this is why he yells hits you because you didn’t address the issue you allowed him to betray you’ never go back
Like father like son it's what he grew up with
Ha booze adverse coming on here
They doing it to their kids aswell.betrayal.says he never loved his father who was the same
You put up with that for forty years sandy.shows how the law doesn't protect.
Yes wow he is still in denial been divorced now since 2013 he has never apologized for betrayal only he has said he never meant to hurt me and yes he blamed it on me basically oh my thank you so very much
❤🙋
NEVER EVER their fault, they rarely own up to their betrayal. Cut your loss and just let it go, you don't need that acknowledgement, because you trust in your own mentality and you know what you know in your heart and spirit. Just leap forward and live happily ever after 💐
Now I understand his sudden behaviour. But I listened to my heart and left to protect myself from his new mental abuse. Karma is taking him though and that is how life goes.
😊
Jodi, you said it well. Things don't unfold in the beginning. It creeps in... little by little. Best solution. I'll keep by myself.
Forgiveness comes from within forgive yourself first and then see how guilty and then see how guilty
My father was and is a habitual cheater I never even wondered about how he feels about himself as he has never shown even a little of remorse or apologize he is never wrong and never heard him say sorry about anything does this mean he has no emotions or feelings etc ???
It means he allowed his God given conscience to be seared
He sounds like a narcissist they don't like anybody
😢😢O, dear professor, how can a woman accept that in her lifetime all it was such a lie? Starting with a parental home so far away...and yet looking at the blue sky full of white cotton clouds after a Summer rain can bring an immense joy. 2 days ago I did listen and watch these heartbreaking videos at yutube and suddenly I felt such a heart pain, brief but strong, ...was that a little heart attack?, out of the sadness. Forgiving is more easy that forgetting. How do I do that?😮😮
I divorced closely 3 years ago and I am also guilty of betrayal that began when I felt unloved. It was like a charade. When the marriage and family broke down I felt I had nothing but my children and I met the Lord. He gave us new lives, therefore, I no longer feel resentment against my Ex.
You don't need to forget the betrayals done to you. The more I look at the root cause of a betrayal it becomes less necessary to keep carrying it. It fades away. I understand that the betrayal wasn't about me at all. I can change my perception of the betrayal taking accountability for my reaction to it. The hard part for me is the growth of myself from the entire process. I want to play victim/place blame instead of realizing that who I truly am as a person is still a strong, independent, loving soul. That I don't need to diminish that because of someone else actions of betrayals. That I don't need to make myself smaller that I can make myself better. A better me is a better world. ❤
Don’t try to forget, in a way you can’t. The best you can do is just accept what has happened and then focus on being who you want to be. The memory will fade the more you become you.
And then he wants to come home bcuz the grass wasn’t greener and he isn’t talking to his real friend much 😮
N O
Add to all this a mother in law who has enmeshed her son, and talks to him every day seeding and fertilising her hatred of his wife under the guise of he's too good for her and deserves better.
Mothers who medal cause a lot of damage. It’s always the mothers.
Yeah. My husband left me for another woman. It was his mother. Had it been a good looking red head I would have at least known how to compete
I've had my MIL tell me I should be grateful cause she's told him to cheat on me and he didn't.
@TheresaAlvarado-e3v yep. There's some dreadful women out there. My mil told my husband that I was irresponsible for having our fourth child. That was AFTER she'd talked him out of a vasectomy based on he might want to marry another woman who wanted to have a child.
All so very true my husband of 36 years who passed in'22 did the final act of betrayal he left all his investments to one of our 4 children unbeknownst to myself he experienced incest and physical abuse as a child I knew of this but learned only after his death he was hiding he had Madonna syndrome where once we married our sex life eventually became non existent I always thought it was due to his sister incest and mother both once true but it was a total shock to learn he was affected by such a horrible disorder where they love they can't desire it doesn't show up until they commit to the relationship thank you for helping me to learn further understanding
Forgiveness is necessary for our soul,
Reconciliation is only possible when the betrayer truly repents
My ex changed the day we married. On that day, he thought he had a license to treat me badly and I had to just take it. Nothing I did was ever good enough. After 20 years I got a job out of town, separated my finances into an S corp. I finally asked for a discussion. Instead of asking me what I wanted to dicuss, he says "This again". I said never mind, packed and left. Texted him divorce papers two days later. To say he was shocked is an understatement. You left your wife to live on her own. What did you expect?
A man who has bettayed will bretray again.
And this is why I don't date dangerous people I stay away
You could also apply these behavioral traits to mental patients; i.e., frontal lobe dementia and Alzheimer's disease for instance! So be careful as to how or to whom you apply these traits and where they are coming from! You need to have more info which might even eventually require a brain scan so don't jump immediately to the idea that the person is nefarious or getting ready to bail on you!
❤Sweetly Blessed Sweetly 2025❤
Very sad
How betrayal happens
I believe you would be interested in more of my life story about this topic
#SECRECY *theomissioniscalculated
#ShiftInLOYALTY
#NowGuardingEmotionalSELF
#TheCostToBETRAY #ExtravagantAndFastFleeting #IrrevocablyAlteredIdentity
I no longer my husband i hate him to the core
I’m the third party. Nothing is mentioned about the betrayal of his lies that he was leaving her. I’m suffering as well. She was emotionally detached from him and that why he cheated on her.
That’s what he told you! I bet if you asked the wife, she would give you a totally different version!!! loverboy just gave you what he wanted you to know and that’s it. Being the third person is truly disgusting.
He could of left her. He could of made that choice. Divorce, then do whatever.
I'm sure he'll tell the next girlfriend the same thing
She instead of HE
Why is it never discussed that the connections he makes outside of the marriage may be very real and close, closer than the two in the marriage? Always it is assumed that the marriage is true love that he had betrayed when the reality is that marriage is complicated and occurs earlier in a very long lifespan
This is exactly what betrayal in the context of marriage is: Making very real and close/r connections outside of his/her marriage; which is supposee to be a covenant relationship, which includes in principle forsaking all others, while faithfully cleaving; from the inception of the marriage to his/her spouse; this until death parts.
In that case the cheating partner should be honest About it and break up
@@sudhamahadevan7051 I did
When people leave their marriages to get closer to the opposite sex, of course they'll fall in line because you see and talk to this person more often. After a while, you'll understand if this true love/connection seems closer than the marriage. Most times it never is and they live with regret when the person they thought would replace their spouse wasn't it at all.
When a person is going down that road they vilinize their partner and forget all the good to appease their guilty conscience, you can't believe anyone looking outside their spouse , why they'll do it to you .
Stops using his brain!
Sounds very narcessistic to me
Done. Over it. He thought i needed him. No! Hes had to live with his mommy off and on since chikdhood. Me, ive been on my own literally since i was 6,7,8 all the way until i graduated high school. In the 4 years i lived eithbkynsister she neve4 once stopped by, cslled on holidays, never on my birthdays, never took me clothes shopping. She wanted me outiv3 forgiven her for over thr last 37 plus years. I lve aftslly n3ver felt close to him. And he was oushknf so hard 😢me to marry me. Im so 5hsnkful i didnt fall and stay in thst m3ntsl war faremental yraps.
Grosssss!