My ex would stop walking and if I didn’t notice Within 5 steps we “weren’t really married”, the drama would begin, and he would stalk off either to a bar or would follow me, stalking like a spy, to “catch me” somehow cheating. So Much Drama! He dumped me and my 5 year old son in key west, took the car and drove home (400 miles), canceling my credit card to “ show me”. Abandoned me and a 5 year old in a strange city. There is a special place in hell for him. He did this because I had told him my mother used to “loose” me at the state fair for the free baby sitting (lost child center), and that was why I was so conscientious about where my young son was. I am happily alone now.
Yes, they absolutely use Any and Every vulnerability you show them as fodder with which to further abuse and attack you. I hope you've learned that you deserve so much better!
The man that I was married to would go to the mall with me and then ditch me, especially at furniture stores so he could be on his own. And yes, most often walked in front of me. We visited friends of his in California and we went on a hike...I have allergies so I was struggling to keep up, some shortness of breath...He left me all the way behind and walked ahead with his friends. I ended up leaving him, and then unfortunately ended up finding another narcissist who was way, way worse. Now I'm on my own, still healing from the narc abuse eight years later.
Several years ago, I went on a date with someone who refused to stop walking at least six feet ahead of me. I was recovering from a hysterectomy at the time and, therefore, could not walk fast. I knew from this guy's behavior that I wouldn't be dating him again.
That Is shocking im.so sorry . My ex now deceased Marc walked ahead and also pushed me beyond my a stamiina. He cycle ahead too and forecasted and help other female riders but not Me his wife.
If my husband ditched me in the store, I would go to all of the sections in the store I love and just take a little me time. I might put something in the cart for myself and then if he was in any particular hurry to leave he could come and find me. If I'm going to get abused either way I might as well make it worth it.
Well dear person, do you know the definition of masochist? "A masochist is a person who derives sexual gratification from their own pain or humiliation." HUMILIATION IS YOUR WORD, NOT MINE! I could be wrong here but you would have to prove it by creating a new life and leaving this "loved one" behind.
This explains why he always walked so far ahead of me. Could barely catch to him. Horrible people! Cruel..mean..unbelievable behavior! So glad for this video. Thank you. ❤
My narc ex would always walk fast and I couldn’t keep up. He’s 6’ 3” and I’m only 5’ 7” so there’s a big difference in height. He also walked ahead of me. I always complained and he would slow down but always had a smirk when I complained. If I had my time again, I would have just turned around and walked away every time just to give him the shits 😂😂😂
Wow- exactly what I went through.. walked way ahead of me- said it was a good workout for me to try to keep up. He is 6'1 and me 5'1" . Cant believe I went along with this for 35 years. Ive been free now for 7 years .
He took me to the hospital,all the time walking way ahead of me,I had my procedure done and was told I have a cancerous tumor,when I got out of the hospital I broke down in tears,he didn't even hug me and say I'm sorry
I’m so sorry. I understand. I flew to Florida for surgery and my sis went with me. When my husband picked me up at the airport, he didn’t even get out of the car to put my suitcase in the trunk after I just had surgery a couple of days earlier! My brother in law had to do it. It hurts. That’s just one example. I had half my liver removed and he didn’t touch me for three months. I mean he didn’t hold my hand kiss my cheek or stroke my hair. He didn’t want to get turned on. My list goes on and on. So I understand.
OMG! When I found out I had cancer. He replied was “what about me?” No hug, no words of sorry about the sad news, that I should be okay.” Or something in that regard that would sound sincere and care like normal people’s response hearing the verdict someone is having cancer. And about walking, why it’s like they all went to school for walking ahead of us. I asked why always walked so far in front of me! I told him he needed to walk beside me. Period. If he walked far ahead of me, I would purposely stop walking and waited for him to come back to walk next to me.
Especially when every word from their mouth is "I do this for you, because I know you were being abused before." Nothing like a "nice guy" who has to control your every move, thought and word while brainwashing you that it's kindness for your betterment.
I suggest every one not to get involved with someone who doesn't respect you ,its better to be single rather than ruining our self-esteem and destroying own short life
At a restaurant, he took up the width of the sidewalk, forcing me behind him and off the edge. I turned my ankle in the landscape gravel, stumbling into the parking lot and onto the pavement. I had sprained my ankle. He kept saying, “Get up, what is wrong with you, you’ll get run over!” He grumbled as he helped me to my feet, and I limped alone to his Jeep, climbing in as best I could alone. He just said, “Hurry up”. In that moment I knew I was done with him. I still wonder why it took me so long.
I always had to day “wait up!” When walking. He was 6 ft and I’m 5 ft. The last times I walked with him I just let him go and he would be a block away before looking to see where I was. I didn’t care at that point, go for it, I’ll stay behind and laugh at you. So much better being away from that. Single and walks alone are better!
Here's a good one...my ex walked quickly and in front of me too. On our honeymoon, unknown to me, he hadn't booked anywhere as he intended to just find a B&B or sleep in the car! Yes our wedding night. Well I had long hair down to my waist, which was frizzy and a bit unkempt so I put my hair into a plait, which hubby didn't like. He said he wouldn't walk down the street with me with my hair in a braid...so he took a brown paper sack from the shops, cut eye holes, and put it over his head and had the audacity to say that people were looking at MY braided hair! Nobody would believe me but unknown to him, his Partner's in laws lived in that wee town and witnessed the spectacle. I was in tears , humiliated and only married a day! 😮
OMG. In New York, my step father, a few times, left my mother to walk home - which was a good 15 min drive, because she disagreed with him (when they were first married). And he always walked way in front of my mom. The last time he did this she was in her 70's, walking with a cane, had Alzheimer's and he was way in front. She tripped and fell, had to have hip surgery, and the anesthesia made her Alzheimer's worse. She was dead 8 months later. I hate him for that.
It is astonishing that narcs all do the same infantile thing, deliberately walking in front of you. They really are the most pathetic of creatures, aren't they?
Narcissists aren’t Born this way, they are Made this way. A matter of fact is they feel no Need for changing, they won’t. The Sooners you get this the faster you get Away from this.Stay there wont help anybody but will destroy you.
my ex-narc husband always walked way out in front of me. Sometimes, when he wanted someone to see him with his wife, he'd hold out his hand, his fingers spread, his elbow stiff, behind him. That was my que to catch up and clasped his hand. To my shame, sometimes I would reach out and take his hand, to keep the peace and I actually thought he loved me at that moment. The times I wouldn't take his hand, I'd have to pretend to be looking at something else then I'd have to beg forgiveness and explain that I didn't see his hand. I was always supposed to be reading his mind and be at his beckoned call. I'm completely free now, but this brought back memories I had forgotten. This is such a lovely and thoughtful channel! ❤
My husband generally walks ahead of me, as if he’s not even w me or wants to wait for me. One time our daughter fell as we were walking and instead of helping her up he acted like he was embarrassed and walked away!!!!!!!! I’ll never forget that. He’s the embarrassing one, what kind of father does this??
I figured this out quite a while into my relationship and decided I would NOT attempt to catch up with them. Told myself, “You are entering this [place] alone, stand tall and walk at a comfortable pace, you’ll catch up with them when you do.” Another grievous habit of theirs is to “peel off” to see what they want, or hit the customer restrooms without a sliver of a thought to letting me know where they’re going. If I am the driver on that outing, I just carry on. If they have driven, I have carried my set of keys to the vehicle to be able to go there, rather than wait anxiously or wander fretfully in search of them. If only I’d known their quirks were part of an untreatable condition, I’d have NEVER continued the relationship. Now, I lean on Danish and the other narcissism survivors for daily encouragement! “Since I can’t go, I just take it slow - and practice self-preservation!”
I went out with a Narrcissist for 3 years. He was a teacher. What I noticed about his walk is he had a corridor in his house, wooden floor and he used to walk up and down it making his feet sound like those old school teachers on the corridors of schools back in the day. I told him he liked the sound of his own feet, authoritative he's the boss. He was an insecure wimp really, he could never win an argument with me. I left him, he died a year later.
THEY RUN FROM ONE CORNER TO THE OTHER, IN THE HOUSE. THEY CANT FIND ANYTHING. IS MY SHIRT IRONED? WHERE IS THIS AND THAT? THEY LET YOU HELP THEM GET READY AND THEN THEY SAY, I AM GOING ALONE, YOU ARE TOO SLOW, YOU ALWAYS MAKE US LATE. HEY, IT SEEMS THAT THERE IS NO US. OUT IN COMPANY, THEY ARE THE MOST CHARMING PERSON YOU EVER MET, LAUGHING, HAVING EYE CONTACT AND AT HOME…NOTHING LIKE THAT.
This is good stuff. Yup. They will slouch or sigh or sound tired or weary or sad to make sure that everyone is attentive to them. Other times when it suits them they behave with dominance. It’s ALL about control. Very difficult to spot.
I knew one who rushed off with the trolley at the grocery store leaving his wife behind. He was so kind to want to help doing the groceries 😊 but only the items he wanted, were allowed in the trolley. She ended up getting her own trolley to put her things in. Soon, he had already gone through the checkout indicating she could not have any goods. He went mad at her at the checkout saying 'what! You cant buy all this stuff! . And the check out girl looked frightened. The woman said to put the items through and it was only a few things amounting to about $25. On previous weeks he was supposed to get these items saying he would do the shopping for her, so kind. Then he returned home without them saying they ran out of those items so he couldnt buy them.
Exactly what my narc would do to me. He would take off in the store when my back was turned and I’d be looking for him with things to buy and he’d be already through the cash register - sometimes even in the car and not communicate with me. It was like hide and seek. He rarely would be with me in a grocery store - only when traveling or on the way home from an event.
My sister wags her butt from side to side when she walks alone! Will you do one on how narcs drive? When I recognize a painful narc behavior, I laugh and it FEELS GOOD! Bless you, Danish!
Agree on the driving suggestion. Seems to be a pretty common shared experience for us. I have flashbacks of how terrifying it was to be in a car with him. He was worse if he drove my car. And he wrecked my car and ran it into everything when he would drive it by himself. He never paid for the damage either. But if I so much as tracked a tiny bit of dirt in his car, he was very angry with me.
agreeed, agreed!! I wondered who in their right mind gave ex-narc a CDL, when he couldn't even drive my car (because his was a clunker) without almost getting into accidents. I guess that was probably on purpose.
Had a "friend" who had a walk like your sister, it was so exaggerated I spotted her while at the tip of a slide at a water park..I was not wearing my glasses, how could I not see it🤦🏾♀️😂😂😂
I have witnessed the fast style, my ex used to do it to me all the time ! We would go for a walk and soon she would be out of sight. The last time I took a walk with her she did it and I met her at the bottom of the hill (2 miles) didn’t say a word to her and proceeded to run up the hill, needless to say when she arrived back home , she was pissed, laughed at me for running and insulted me for doing so, I just smiled, but I think it said something to her, and that’s when the discard began , how dare I give her the same treatment she had given me every time we walked, they don’t want a shared experience, you are not worthy of that, it’s all about what you can contribute to their experience or not, depending on what twisted phase of their game they are in.
This had always hurted me and I didn’t know why he did this( my husband). Now I know. My parents were narcissits, Handled me like an object, I was always wrong. No matter which effort I Made. I was meant to bê the adult in the Room when needed and the Baby as well. Uncomfortable.My First husband was an over one, my second one a covert one.Unfortunately I took the critic Inside of me until I realized what this was all about. I divorced my second husband and thanks to Danish and others I now know I Chose what I was familiar with. I still struggle but improving Seven years later.
You were already in the discard if she was literally leaving you behind on a walk! Good for you to go for a jog when you did! That’s hilarious. Glad you’re free.
My husband used to walk ahead of me, and I couldn’t keep up with his pace. Meanwhile, my mother-in-law would always walk behind me, and I could feel her eyes on my back the entire time. It made me so uncomfortable back then when I was young and hanging out with her-it was horrible, and this video brought those memories back.
@@michaelfrank5239 Perhaps you're exactly the type who constantly disregards others' feelings, behaves rudely, and thrives on being toxic. If that's the case, it's no wonder you're facing backlash.
@@michaelfrank5239 Perhaps you're exactly the type who constantly disregards others' feelings, behaves rudely, and thrives on being toxic. If that's the case, it's no wonder you're facing backlash.
Another example of him not caring about my needs was when I was in labour. There was only one chair by the registration desk at the hospital and he sat in it, forcing me to stand with contractions only 1 minute apart.
Mine went and got coffee and breakfast when I was in the last hour of labor- many times- once he sat and read a newspaper when I was ready to go in for surgery.
Many times walked around with his hands in his pockets. I know all too well about these monsters. Married to one for 50 years sad to say. Life of torment. RUN AWAY PEOPLE. NOTHING IS WORTH PUTTING UP WITH THEIR ABUSE!!😢
my mom ALWAYS walks ahead of me and my dad. It’s like her superiority of “follow the leader” unlike My dad that always walks with me (thankfully) She did this to me when I was little trying to keep up with her as well, I constantly got lost everywhere and was an anxiety filled child. That caused me so much stress I shouldn’t have had at that age. There’s only so fast you can walk (without RUNNING) when you’re 5-10 years old with short legs
My mom did that too. I remember losing sight of her when I was little and I was so scared. When you're little you can't see over the tops of the clothing. It's only in recent years that people have been talking about narcissism that I realized she's a narcissist. Now she's 88 and has bad pain in her legs and needs a walker.
My husband would walk way ahead of me and our daughters at an amusement park or something- so we just sat down on a bench to see how far he would walk until he realized no one was behind him. 😂.
Wow! I have been harassed, stalked and everything evil by a tenant in my building. Malignant, cruel and deceptive. YES, THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT SHE DOES! Grandiose, head up marching like a General with hands behind her back and, yes, with that smirk on her face. Intruding on people. No boundaries, she bullies and subjugates others. She either follows me or blindsides me to block my access. Both of which require watching me and planning her attacks, changing her routine and direction exactly as I change mine in trying to avoid her. I carry my phone to document as this has done much harm to me and my health. 😢
I had a casual long distance situationship off and on for 10 years with a man that I went to see while he was working. I drove 4 hours to stay the night. When I arrived he asked if I wanted to go to the mall because he wanted to buy something. I struggled to keep up as he walked purposefully, barely noticing that I was about 20 feet behind him the entire time. Internally, I told myself I was the problem because I couldn’t keep up. He and I didn’t see each other for 7 more years until he drive thru my city on his way to his next job site and he reached out. I went to see him and stayed the night and the next morning he walked significantly ahead of me until we parted ways in the garage with a quick hug and kiss. I’m the kind of person that thinks I have to accept what little I can get. My mom use to tell me that I needed too much love and always made me feel bad for wanting.
My ex always walked behind to “see who I was looking at” and who was looking at me! And then accuse me of flirting and threaten me and their target. He even hit me a few times when I didn’t admit to the flirting he just KNEW I was doing…that I never actually did 😢
They're extremely insecure and jealous. They will literally convince themselves through delusional hallucinations that you're cheating and all the ways you would cheat and who you would cheat with. It's an obsessive fanatasy of theirs. They will always watch you and stare at you, trying to imagine what you would do, who you would do it with and how you would do it. Because that's how THEY would do it. The most absurd narcissists will cheat on you because they fantasized about you cheaten on them first. Their insane ego can be challenged through pure imagination. They're sick people who cause nothing but misery in the end.
Omg, the puffed up polar bear. Love it 🤣 That's sooo him. It's embarrassing. But I used to think it was a competition thing. He always had to be first, or the smartest, the biggest, the fastest, had to win at everything. Makes me feel sick to think I tried too see the good in that monster.
Thank you for this video. Somehow, I never connected that his walking behavior was narcissistic! It seems extremely clear now. He always walks ahead of me - unless walking with me will give him supply for some reason. We would go to the grocery store and I'd catch up, then stop to take something from the shelf and he would be around the next isle with the cart. I was always losing him, chasing him around the store with my arms loaded with groceries to put into the cart. Hiking, cycling, airports, everywhere, I'm left trailing 10 feet behind. I'm not slow, he just plows ahead quickly - and goes faster when I about catch up.
Thank you for posting this. NOW it makes sense to me too. My EX husband did the same thing to me for 18 years, everywhere. I felt so disrespected & humiliated by his actions. We're BOTH fast walkers, but he always insisted on walking 10 paces ahead of me. One time I finally said, "Wait up! It's NOT a competition!" His response, "You have to KEEP UP", as he looked back at me. Yet, when walking with guy friends, he was always walking shoulder to shoulder. For our 3rd anniversary, we went to dinner in San Francisco with another couple. It was dark & after parking the car, my husband walked shoulder to shoulder, next to THEM, to the restaurant for 3 city blocks, leaving me walking BEHIND them. He never once looked back to see if I was there. He was/is a self righteous ass & actually told me once that HE thinks HE'S better than other people 😮. I don't miss that dictator.
Nothing with these monsters can ever be normal. When I was 10, I wouldn't walk near narc mother, as she has this tendency of tripping people with her feet just walking. But the irony is that they can wield the power of pretense of appearing to be more than normal to others. Just go no-contact and run!
My husband walked so far ahead of me during an outing that I turned around & went back home. He was shocked - but I was home 15 minutes before he got back. Last time we went anywhere “together.”
I just want to say thank you. Your posts are so powerful and healing. I love that you can covey so much wisdom and affirmation in a reasonable amount of time. Just sooooo helpful. THANK YOU
Visiting my daughter in Australia (from NZ) we walked to the local shopping centre. On leaving, each of us carrying 2 bags loaded with groceries, she strode on way ahead of me. I ran across 4 busy lanes of traffic up the hill and proceeded on in front of her as she waited to cross at the lights. When she finally caught up, she asked incredulously 'were you running?'
He has walked ahead of me for 11 years. I’ve talked about it since we met and he still does it. I started noticing when I catch up to him, he turns to see me out of his side eye and speeds up. It makes me feel like I’m constantly chasing him or we’re racing. I’ve also noticed he will walk right past other women who are waiting in lines without asking if they’re waiting or whatnot. I called him out on it once when it was painfully obvious he jumped in a line because I didn’t want to be seen as so rude. He also yells at women in public when social faux pas happen. He only acts this way with women, never men. I hope I don’t make it to 13 years with this man.😢
After my third c section he came to pick me up( the second child he didn’t show up) the nurse asked if I wanted a wheelchair, he said no. Walked way ahead of me and picked a fight about how the car seat was supposed to go. Another occasion he hit himself in the face, until black and blue wore his worn house clothes insisting we go to the store after I got out of work ( full dress and make up) hold the kids hand and walk far enough behind to make it look pitiful
My ex narc husband walked hand in hand with his mother every time, leaving me to follow..... and the horrible thing I was towards the last few weeks of my pregnancy. Yes the cult always walked together either ahead or lagged behind.
Each and every word you are telling is true. My husband never allow me to walk in front of him. He push me side and walk in front. His body language is so arrogant. When we walk, he always try to push me on the side of the road and walk in front giving me no space to walk. Shame on him.
Or they purposely walk unreasonably slow then scold you for walking to fast! Like if you can’t walk normal tell me before hand a walk isn’t a beneficiary walk if it’s less than 3 miles an hour dottling is pointless!
@joanbaczek2575 Or their legs are a lot shorter and/or they aren't in shape compared to the person walking faster than them and they are upset because of the lack of consideration from the taller/more fit person.
@joanbaczek2575 If you are walking with an elderly person ; it's going to be really slow. You walk with them for the company and take time for exercise on your own time. My grandma used to walk painfully slow but I always showed her respect and patience.
My toxic extreme narc brother saunters with this sway back and belly out. As a teen, the family used to comment on how he always walked 50' ahead or behind the rest of us.
My husband does that with his mother! Always goes in front of me until it comes to checkout the items!!!! Then I go in front to pay for everything every time … been going on for many years.
Mine walked like a slippery shoulders hubched and just looked nervous 24/7. Then depending on the situation he would switch to super confident. Its like i could see the wheels turning to manipulate ppl depending on who he was around.
Hello Danish! I always wondered why when we were walking together he ALWAYS had to be ahead of me and he was moving at a fast pace . Thank you for the clarification ❤️
Ditto. First time was when we went shopping after honeymoon, to use wedding present money. I was pregnant, he ran ahead, scolded me for not keeping up, would not let me rest, stop for tea, just complained at my slowness. That was 57 years ago. We stayed married for 22 years. He took me for a walk one day, I thought he was at last willing to walk next to me, but he said "I want to leave you!" I sympathise and asked him when do you want to go, can I help you find a place to stay?
Now who would have thought that "walking" would be a topic attached to a narcissist? Danish you have detailed and explained this so well. Mine did it always ahead and walked as though he had some important matter to attend to. Even walking the dog together. So irritating. Or he walked behind so I couldn't see his beady snake eyes taking in the people around us, scoping them out, to zero in on which one he should impress or ego stroke the most. It was physically impossible for him to walk beside me. When I started asking him about his behavior and odd habits walking he would answer No I'm not! Or Yes I am! Like a defensive little brat. Lord have mercy!
Next time they walk so far in front of you, just turn around and go somewhere else..home, perhaps..I'm sure I've done this before..summising that they were not comfy walking with me, I gave up x
Upon leaving the hospital with our newborn he took off ahead with the baby and no thought to staying with me let alone helping me (they don't make you leave in a wheelchair after giving birth in ontario). Needless to say I was in pain and needed support. It's interesting and helpful to learn these common behaviors. I left 13 years ago but he is still abusive at every opportunity.
@@SimplyD4 did u mean u can say that again. Or say that again to understand. Like joanne said it has to come naturally. Like idiots we are understanding them and understanding them they pretend like we are not getting them. All are pretense to make us run from one goal post to another
@@Jennifer-gr7hn very true. Danish is giving us perspectives. Till we realize we won’t accept what is being said. 2 years b4 I married ex itself someone told me u hate yourself do u know that. I didn’t understand I kept choosing people who treated me like shit while being overconfident about my likability
My husband doesn’t go anywhere with his mom but all of his attention is always toward our daughter in public. He gives her the attention he should be giving to me. Unless it’s inappropriate. He will do stuff to me like grab my behind or nibble my neck. My 11 even told me it’s inappropriate. I see the narcissist now. He is definitely one.
During chemo, one day we had to to sams. Coming out of the store, he raced ahead of me, it's what he does, I saw a teenage Chinese boy and his grandfather pushing their cart, I asked the boy if I could hold onto his arm to walk to the car, which he nicely said yes.
Walking down the middle of the sidewalk, so the other person has to walk in the gutter, on the shoulder, or behind. They also walk a lot faster than the other person can comfortably do.
Oh Boy- i needed this: it sooo made me laugh & chuckle 😂. Childhood trauma survivor from covert religious community narc mom! Sometimes laughter trully IS the best medicine. Id say "marching style"- We constantly got our marching orders.
OMG my husband is a former marine, he always has walked ahead of me and ate his food so fast never savoring or enjoying the meal as if he was shoveling his food in his mouth I would ask him why? He said in the Marines you had to eat fast on the go all the time and it’s been a habit since, but the walking ahead nah ah don’t think it’s a veteran thing now that I watched this, it makes so much sense, and his bullying, tormenting, ghosting, punishing slights, gaslighting, invalidating, lies and talks over you doesn’t give you a chance to talk, a conversation he thinks is an argument, chaotic 33 yrs of marriage and substance abuse and alcohol also, although he no longer drinks or does substances because his body could no longer tolerate it or it would be detrimental to his health, that in itself is another story yrs and yrs of that, he’s moody, mind games, no empathy, walking on egg shells that’s the word of who he truly is a NARCISSIST wow!!!!
I married my ex in part because he was so affectionate towards his elderly mother. I was taught that that was a good sign! I later came to call her “the only woman he ever loved.”
The narcissist in my little world walks all puffed up like she is the most important thing in the room. She stops and talks to everyone and fills them full of flattery because she needs to be the best, the favorite, the most popular., and better than anyone else in the world. She walks over the top of people whom she sees as inferior and when she causes enough havoc in their life, she swoops in, wanting to be their savior.
I so agree with this! My narc walks behind me everywhere. I see him smiling at everyone, if I turn around or slow down he stops smiling immediately! He smiles so much many people don’t even acknowledge me, they only look at him. Even men give him all the attention. They stare at him right past me. I’ve asked him about it but he denies what he does! Yet he will attack me if someone happens to talk to me or notice me!
Can't believe what I am hearing about the walking patterns and even eating patterns of a narrcissist......it explains so much of what I experienced.....always wondered what made him tick ??? The biggest of these is the love and attention he gave his Mother.....which I thought was a good sign......SOOO WRONG WAS I. I found out the hard way.....his Mother was his ONE TRUE LOVE !!!
I have traumatic brain injury and we make videos for other people who have it. I tried to stay out of the relationship video because of my past with a narcissist but I was encouraged to offer something so I spoke about how much you can learn about a person when you’re holding hands. They could try to control where you go, give in to wherever you go or they can discuss their direction. A narcissist, or at least mine, doesn’t hold hands for the same exact reasons you have highlighted in your video, so thank you so much!
Being in a car with Someone like my father used to bê a Cage, no escape. Like sunday Morning breakfasts, so I Skipped this in my teenage years.His favorites were to ask me questions Not meeting my age and Knowledge, só he was the brilliant one the who had the Right answer.
Me too. My ex walked far behind. They’re watching you and any interactions with other people. I found out to my horror, he made gestures and mean faces behind my back when I was talking to someone.
Lol😂 Narcs love the chase! Im reading comments and i just got the biggest confirmation, they love the feeling of being pursued. They're wired to want to be wanted and if they have a trail of people behind them trying to keep up, in their mind, they're in control in that moment. It's not competition It's a sense of being chased or wanted.
Cool video, Danish. My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her
its difficult to let go of someone you love, i was in a similar situation, my relationship of 12 years ended, but i couldnt just let him go i did all i could to get him back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual counselor who helped me bring him back
You have to just know that eventually you will be over her. Time will heal this wound. I know because I've been through it more than once. If she was a narcissist, then you are not thinking straight right now. She lied to you and betrayed you. Why would you want her back? You don't need a "spiritual counselor" to help get her back. That is ridiculous. You need to move on. Occupy your mind with other things. It will be hard but you'll get there.
The ministry of funny walks has a whole back catalogue that can be aligned to narcissistic behaviours...i remember my dad walking in front of my mother and us kids and been very proud of how fast he walked.😅....we had great days out without him.
I know the narcissists very well and already observed these types of walking styles. But you are the first person to point it out, analyse it and make it public. It conforts me on my observation and I feel understood. So, thank you very much for this video ! 😊
Repetition compulsion survivor; scapegoat in family system. Every single one had some way of holding their body in the world to compensate or to send a specific message. They work to normalize their own mental biases and want to believe in that normalization, they believe most of the public judges individuals in petty ways like they do. It is a painful way to live! It means they must be self conscious even with the way they walk in public. My first ex bf (grandiose, thinks he's a lawyer type) coached me, "Do not make space for others on the sidewalk. Keep walking and looking perfectly straight, and they'll make space or go around you." This was because I put one foot off the sidewalk to allow a family with a few kids to pass on the sidewalk. He said it again during an event a few months later. It took me the second time to grasp that he really believed people are assigned actual meaningful value and social power, all based on their posture and gaze when they pass each other on the sidewalk. My LORD their worlds are so teeny tiny!! Imagine being so limited that the way someone passes you on a sidewalk could seriously set you off for the entire day. 😂 The first layer of deconditioning, I learned I didnt have to fear all that stuff. I thought my mom was anxious and trying to help me, in her own way. The second layer, I learned that she wanted me to be afraid of those things, but actually wasn't scared of them herself. I really didn't get it until i understood the character disordered vs neurotic spectrum from George Simon.
I am a fast walker, but when I don't walk alone or with people who walk the same pace, I adapt to the velocity of the other one(s), even though it gives me sort of anxiety when I have to walk much slower than usual
Sport on with covert. It was an observation i had with my ex wife. She played everyone! She made false allegations , but, someone so shy / nice couldn’t possibly be lying. Different person at home. Finally 3 years of family court battles , she was found malicious , all her false allegation come to light and I now have 50/50 shared care of my kids.
We got to the check out line in the grocery store when he says he forgot the milk. Which happened to be in the farthest back corner of the store, knowing I would have to run all the way to retrieve it because we were holding up other people. All this is so true. It’s over now. 🙏🏽♥️🤗
Go for a wedding ceremony- they never stay near wife and family or for a picture with own family Then you see him standing with others men or women for pictures and having active conversations
My narc ex would walk faster than me and I had to catch up to him, but also he would constantly judge me about the way I walked. At the grocery store he would waste a hell lot of time in deciding what he wanted and did not care what I want, he wouldn't let me buy anything and would judge my every decision in buying things.
I'm finally free of mine. After telling him a few home truths about his diabolical behaviour.. Give him both barrels & he went silent He's lost interest now he knows he can't control me. Just proves it was never about love because they're incapable. Control is all they want. Well I'm worth more than that & so are you.. 🙏
@@DJPeachyful I'm glad you are free and you called him out. Yes they definitely lose interest when they see you stronger and happier. When I texted my ex saying that I'm doing good n with a smile, he just blocked me lol.
The walking fast ahead ,I know that one, not putting up with it with someone again. Also, the one where you make a suggestion about something, they do the opposite, so immature.
I experienced the walking ahead, my ex would get mad at me for trying to keep, he said I always had to race him. Getting out of the car not fast enough. I was constantly lectured about being to slow on purpose.
I’m a recovered victim. The person had every walking style except the hands behind the back. This just helps me know how true all of this is thinking back. Thank you.
I HAVE A FRIEND WHO USED TO DITCH ME AT THE FURNITURE STORE…IT MAKES ME SUSPICIOUS AND THEN SHE WOULD CALL ME AND COMPLAIN TO ME ABOUT NOT BEING ABLE TO REACH ME, BECAUSE OF THE BAD RECEPTION, IN THE STORE. I GUESS SHE IS ONE TOO. IT IS A CRUEL WORLD.
At 1st my narc hub walked ahead of me by 5 feet or so. But since I like to walk fast, he resorted to walking 5 feet behind me. After church, he was the last to leave even when i said that I needed to leave right afterwards because I had something to do. A couple of times he ran the car off the road on purpose so I stopped riding with him. Eventually, he filled up his car with trash so that there was no space for anyone to sit!! 😅
You are spot on with this. It has been my experience for a very long time now. My sick husband decided to start treating his own daughter, like a girlfriend when she went through puberty and became more developed. It was disgusting for me to watch them, hold hands and walk in front of me like they were a couple and I would be left behind wherever we went. She admitted to her boyfriend that this was very strange part of her life now that she is dating and almost married, and that at some point in her adolescence, she felt like her dad was her boyfriend. So it is evident that the message he was sending to herwas not made up by me and was an actual feeling that he gave her. How confusing for someone going through puberty to experience these feelings towards their own father
So spot on. Every single word resonates with what I faced. The person in my life had every single character you mentioned, every type of display in different scenario.
I was just explaining about John's peculiar walk to a friend of mine earlier today. I was saying that he could easily be spotted in a large crowd for his strange walk. It's a bit like a waddling Penguin. His legs seem to bend outwards.
My ex boyfriend would do this, walk very fast ahead of me while hiking and I would ask him why he did this and he would say that I'm walking too slow when I wasn't 🤔. I would think even if I did walk slow why wouldn't he walk with his girlfriend 🤔🤔. Great video, thanks!.?
My ex always walked ahead of me. He’d also disappear from me in stores. He also parked his car at the furthest possible point from the other cars. It’s ridiculous.
yeah standing and walking with head high, walking faster than others, taking all the space in public, talking loud to others to terrify them and talking on phone without any reason in public places to send the message that they don't recognize others in their surroundings or pretend that they are not alone, they have company and they are not getting bored like in waiting areas or elevators or waiting for elevators.
Spotted one do the cell phone extra loud talk entrance into a room because he wanted everyone to notice he had a new phone and after the call get all the attention discussing and showing off the new cell phone.
My ex partner 3years i was with him but he wasn't with me. He only took me out to dinner once. That's when we first met. This horrible man called me so much horrible names any special day he would spoil it my birthday Christmas .he always goes missing for 3 months then comes back like nothing happened Evil people
I was married to a narcissist for 25 yrs. Now I know why he always walked ahead of me and when I would ask him to slow down it always caused a problem. Thank you!!!
Wow, that was freakishly accurate 😮!!! I have always wondered why so many of our traumas involved “occasions”, such as shopping malls. Etc! As you said, you would be disciplined if everything didn’t go 100% as expected. My husband would walk far ahead and be tall, so we had to run practically! And yes, he’s still holding her hand 26 years after marriage. (6 years separated - in the process of divorce). She’s the enabler. His family were a “cultish tribe”, for lack of better words, and when they got the church under their belt, I was excommunicated when I escaped the dangerous situation I was in and got a protection order. Within 3 days, they had the kids turned against me. The walking styles and those open-arm gestures - SPOT ON!!! He would stretch out his arms like that. He would answer a call, laugh hard and joke on the phone calls right in the middle of a blow-up! He would snap and click his hands together as he walked. He was always paranoid about the property perimeter and would always do checks, often with his pistol and his pitbull; he had even let the pitbull chase someone before who was stealing cables. I would think that was normal. He would fire shots into the air and try to catch the intruders. I was living with adrenaline flowing through me 24/7! One big thing - He would whistle. Whenever he was in the zone of silent treatment as punishment, he would whistle, (silent treatment would go on for days.)😅 Projection all the time ...are you having an affair, etc, and in the meantime, he was having quickies (which I could never prove, but I know they were happening at his jaunts). I am so grateful I got away; the Dr said I wouldn't have survived another 7 months (I ended up having a TIA and many health issues)
My husband and a female friend of his raced out ahead of me at the shopping center. I’d recently had spinal cord surgery and needed a walker to get around. I couldn’t even attempt to keep up. They loudly discussed how dramatic I was being. She said the epidural she’d had years prior was the same as the procedure I had undergone. He agreed with her calling me a drama queen, knowing that she was wrong. I quit trying to catch up and went into a cafe. Of course when they finally found me I was berated for not considering the needs of the group. I was not allowed to turn my head or reach for any reason at that point in my recovery. That was the moment I realized I had married a narcissist. But at least his friend had a lovely vacation during my recuperation period .
Thank you so much Danish for sharing your knowledge. It is so true. I am 67 and a couple of years ago I realised that my husband and my girlfriend plus certain family members are narcissists, thanks to channels like yours. It is devastating to think that I wasted my whole life on narcissists. My husband has always walked fast ahead of me, rushes madly around the supermarket doing his own thing and so does my girlfriend, the same. They are both very controlling and heartless. I’m too old to leave my husband unless I win the lottery but I see much less of my friend and at least I have finally learnt to see through all the belittling going on. 🙏⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
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One question if may I, would narcisist, change while on long term with the new supply? Thanks in advance
@@llulu8516 I, personally, have never seen it. Interesting question.
My ex would stop walking and if I didn’t notice Within 5 steps we “weren’t really married”, the drama would begin, and he would stalk off either to a bar or would follow me, stalking like a spy, to “catch me” somehow cheating. So Much Drama! He dumped me and my 5 year old son in key west, took the car and drove home (400 miles), canceling my credit card to “ show me”. Abandoned me and a 5 year old in a strange city. There is a special place in hell for him. He did this because I had told him my mother used to “loose” me at the state fair for the free baby sitting (lost child center), and that was why I was so conscientious about where my young son was. I am happily alone now.
Yes, they absolutely use Any and Every vulnerability you show them as fodder with which to further abuse and attack you. I hope you've learned that you deserve so much better!
He didn't know at the time that he was throwing Brer Rabbit into the Briar Patch! 😂😊❤ all the best!
The man that I was married to would go to the mall with me and then ditch me, especially at furniture stores so he could be on his own. And yes, most often walked in front of me. We visited friends of his in California and we went on a hike...I have allergies so I was struggling to keep up, some shortness of breath...He left me all the way behind and walked ahead with his friends. I ended up leaving him, and then unfortunately ended up finding another narcissist who was way, way worse. Now I'm on my own, still healing from the narc abuse eight years later.
The same here sister❤
Several years ago, I went on a date with someone who refused to stop walking at least six feet ahead of me. I was recovering from a hysterectomy at the time and, therefore, could not walk fast. I knew from this guy's behavior that I wouldn't be dating him again.
May you heal and thrive
That Is shocking im.so sorry . My ex now deceased Marc walked ahead and also pushed me beyond my a stamiina. He cycle ahead too and forecasted and help other female riders but not Me his wife.
If my husband ditched me in the store, I would go to all of the sections in the store I love and just take a little me time. I might put something in the cart for myself and then if he was in any particular hurry to leave he could come and find me. If I'm going to get abused either way I might as well make it worth it.
Yes it’s humiliating loving a narcissist. Always sending the message in public that you are nothing to them, that they are available for an upgrade.
Well dear person, do you know the definition of masochist? "A masochist is a person who derives sexual gratification from their own pain or humiliation." HUMILIATION IS YOUR WORD, NOT MINE! I could be wrong here but you would have to prove it by creating a new life and leaving this "loved one" behind.
This makes me wonder if they sometimes go for a 'downgrade' on purpose, just to show their former how low they actually see us.
well said
Then do not love them💪👍😡
This explains why he always walked so far ahead of me. Could barely catch to him. Horrible people! Cruel..mean..unbelievable behavior! So glad for this video. Thank you. ❤
Yes true❤
They're like a galloping cancer.
Same my husband
My narc ex would always walk fast and I couldn’t keep up. He’s 6’ 3” and I’m only 5’ 7” so there’s a big difference in height. He also walked ahead of me. I always complained and he would slow down but always had a smirk when I complained. If I had my time again, I would have just turned around and walked away every time just to give him the shits 😂😂😂
Wow- exactly what I went through.. walked way ahead of me- said it was a good workout for me to try to keep up. He is 6'1 and me 5'1" . Cant believe I went along with this for 35 years. Ive been free now for 7 years .
He took me to the hospital,all the time walking way ahead of me,I had my procedure done and was told I have a cancerous tumor,when I got out of the hospital I broke down in tears,he didn't even hug me and say I'm sorry
I’m so sorry. I understand. I flew to Florida for surgery and my sis went with me. When my husband picked me up at the airport, he didn’t even get out of the car to put my suitcase in the trunk after I just had surgery a couple of days earlier! My brother in law had to do it. It hurts. That’s just one example. I had half my liver removed and he didn’t touch me for three months. I mean he didn’t hold my hand kiss my cheek or stroke my hair. He didn’t want to get turned on. My list goes on and on. So I understand.
What a monster, hope you are healthy now and that he gets the worst in life.
@@ritadyer9295 what an evil man,I hope you divorced him
OMG! When I found out I had cancer. He replied was “what about me?” No hug, no words of sorry about the sad news, that I should be okay.” Or something in that regard that would sound sincere and care like normal people’s response hearing the verdict someone is having cancer.
And about walking, why it’s like they all went to school for walking ahead of us. I asked why always walked so far in front of me! I told him he needed to walk beside me. Period. If he walked far ahead of me, I would purposely stop walking and waited for him to come back to walk next to me.
@@Sunshine-uo8nv❤🙏
Such a subtle thing that the world cannot pick up on but is soul destroying to those trapped in their web
💯
Especially when every word from their mouth is "I do this for you, because I know you were being abused before." Nothing like a "nice guy" who has to control your every move, thought and word while brainwashing you that it's kindness for your betterment.
Sad for children who have them for parents-very damaging and hard to get past!!
I suggest every one not to get involved with someone who doesn't respect you ,its better to be single rather than ruining our self-esteem and destroying own short life
At a restaurant, he took up the width of the sidewalk, forcing me behind him and off the edge. I turned my ankle in the landscape gravel, stumbling into the parking lot and onto the pavement. I had sprained my ankle. He kept saying, “Get up, what is wrong with you, you’ll get run over!” He grumbled as he helped me to my feet, and I limped alone to his Jeep, climbing in as best I could alone. He just said, “Hurry up”. In that moment I knew I was done with him. I still wonder why it took me so long.
I always had to day “wait up!” When walking. He was 6 ft and I’m 5 ft. The last times I walked with him I just let him go and he would be a block away before looking to see where I was. I didn’t care at that point, go for it, I’ll stay behind and laugh at you. So much better being away from that. Single and walks alone are better!
It’s a good sign that you can laugh now!! It is humorous in a dark way.
@@trishs4503and I was married to him for 40 years! Now I have a peaceful joyful single life
Much more clarity.
“Single and walks alone” sounds like an Indian warrior. I like it. 😉👍🏼👍🏼🤍
I agree! I fly solo too!!
Here's a good one...my ex walked quickly and in front of me too. On our honeymoon, unknown to me, he hadn't booked anywhere as he intended to just find a B&B or sleep in the car! Yes our wedding night. Well I had long hair down to my waist, which was frizzy and a bit unkempt so I put my hair into a plait, which hubby didn't like. He said he wouldn't walk down the street with me with my hair in a braid...so he took a brown paper sack from the shops, cut eye holes, and put it over his head and had the audacity to say that people were looking at MY braided hair! Nobody would believe me but unknown to him, his Partner's in laws lived in that wee town and witnessed the spectacle. I was in tears , humiliated and only married a day! 😮
So glad you got rid of that one !!
Thank God, you didn't give him one more day of your life!
That would have been the first and last day married
his partner's in-laws? You mean your parents / family?
@@SandyCheeks63564 Exactly, I was wondering if it was just me who didn't understand that ( I am not native English speaker)or was he a polygamist?
OMG. In New York, my step father, a few times, left my mother to walk home - which was a good 15 min drive, because she disagreed with him (when they were first married). And he always walked way in front of my mom. The last time he did this she was in her 70's, walking with a cane, had Alzheimer's and he was way in front. She tripped and fell, had to have hip surgery, and the anesthesia made her Alzheimer's worse. She was dead 8 months later. I hate him for that.
I’m so very sorry. What a monstrous man.
@@readysetgo8706 Thank you.
😢so awful
They are monsters.
It's always about them and making the spouse look unworthy of their time. I'm so sorry for your loss.
To everyone that is suffering you ARE loved and you CAN get away from this. Please leave discreetly if you can. I know the feeling.
... and go NO CONTACT!!!
Very true
It is astonishing that narcs all do the same infantile thing, deliberately walking in front of you. They really are the most pathetic of creatures, aren't they?
Narcissists aren’t Born this way, they are Made this way. A matter of fact is they feel no Need for changing, they won’t.
The Sooners you get this the faster you get Away from this.Stay there wont help anybody but will destroy you.
Yes!!
Yes, experienced this with two males recent, my xpartner, & now supposed friend.
Yes. My ex did that.
Like they are cut from the same cloth
My ex always walked ahead of me or behind me, but never besides me...he loved chaos... The grocery store games ...everything that you said is on point
my ex-narc husband always walked way out in front of me. Sometimes, when he wanted someone to see him with his wife, he'd hold out his hand, his fingers spread, his elbow stiff, behind him. That was my que to catch up and clasped his hand. To my shame, sometimes I would reach out and take his hand, to keep the peace and I actually thought he loved me at that moment. The times I wouldn't take his hand, I'd have to pretend to be looking at something else then I'd have to beg forgiveness and explain that I didn't see his hand. I was always supposed to be reading his mind and be at his beckoned call. I'm completely free now, but this brought back memories I had forgotten. This is such a lovely and thoughtful channel! ❤
So very sad isn't it. Sad and pathetic.
My husband generally walks ahead of me, as if he’s not even w me or wants to wait for me. One time our daughter fell as we were walking and instead of helping her up he acted like he was embarrassed and walked away!!!!!!!! I’ll never forget that. He’s the embarrassing one, what kind of father does this??
A narc
I figured this out quite a while into my relationship and decided I would NOT attempt to catch up with them. Told myself, “You are entering this [place] alone, stand tall and walk at a comfortable pace, you’ll catch up with them when you do.”
Another grievous habit of theirs is to “peel off” to see what they want, or hit the customer restrooms without a sliver of a thought to letting me know where they’re going. If I am the driver on that outing, I just carry on. If they have driven, I have carried my set of keys to the vehicle to be able to go there, rather than wait anxiously or wander fretfully in search of them.
If only I’d known their quirks were part of an untreatable condition, I’d have NEVER continued the relationship.
Now, I lean on Danish and the other narcissism survivors for daily encouragement!
“Since I can’t go, I just take it slow - and practice self-preservation!”
I went out with a Narrcissist for 3 years. He was a teacher. What I noticed about his walk is he had a corridor in his house, wooden floor and he used to walk up and down it making his feet sound like those old school teachers on the corridors of schools back in the day. I told him he liked the sound of his own feet, authoritative he's the boss. He was an insecure wimp really, he could never win an argument with me. I left him, he died a year later.
Usually its the narcissist that wins the arguments 🤔
Your comment has good rhythm and cadence. Reads like a sad poem.
THEY RUN FROM ONE CORNER TO THE OTHER, IN THE HOUSE. THEY CANT FIND ANYTHING. IS MY SHIRT IRONED? WHERE IS THIS AND THAT? THEY LET YOU HELP THEM GET READY AND THEN THEY SAY, I AM GOING ALONE, YOU ARE TOO SLOW, YOU ALWAYS MAKE US LATE. HEY, IT SEEMS THAT THERE IS NO US. OUT IN COMPANY, THEY ARE THE MOST CHARMING PERSON YOU EVER MET, LAUGHING, HAVING EYE CONTACT AND AT HOME…NOTHING LIKE THAT.
I would of left him along time ago, he had every intention on going by himself to look for new supply
@@specialk8927 That is wonderful. You are very smart and it is healthy to do so.
Narcissists are “street angels and house devils “.
Yes, everyone thought he was entertaining and so kind. Not like that at home.
@@scientist3149I’d say walking ahead of their spouse is no street angel, correct?
This is good stuff. Yup. They will slouch or sigh or sound tired or weary or sad to make sure that everyone is attentive to them. Other times when it suits them they behave with dominance. It’s ALL about control. Very difficult to spot.
I knew one who rushed off with the trolley at the grocery store leaving his wife behind. He was so kind to want to help doing the groceries 😊 but only the items he wanted, were allowed in the trolley. She ended up getting her own trolley to put her things in. Soon, he had already gone through the checkout indicating she could not have any goods. He went mad at her at the checkout saying 'what! You cant buy all this stuff! . And the check out girl looked frightened. The woman said to put the items through and it was only a few things amounting to about $25. On previous weeks he was supposed to get these items saying he would do the shopping for her, so kind. Then he returned home without them saying they ran out of those items so he couldnt buy them.
Exactly what my narc would do to me. He would take off in the store when my back was turned and I’d be looking for him with things to buy and he’d be already through the cash register - sometimes even in the car and not communicate with me. It was like hide and seek. He rarely would be with me in a grocery store - only when traveling or on the way home from an event.
My sister wags her butt from side to side when she walks alone! Will you do one on how narcs drive? When I recognize a painful narc behavior, I laugh and it FEELS GOOD! Bless you, Danish!
Agree on the driving suggestion. Seems to be a pretty common shared experience for us. I have flashbacks of how terrifying it was to be in a car with him. He was worse if he drove my car. And he wrecked my car and ran it into everything when he would drive it by himself. He never paid for the damage either. But if I so much as tracked a tiny bit of dirt in his car, he was very angry with me.
butt wagging....yes, so many. Just open fakebuk!!
agreeed, agreed!! I wondered who in their right mind gave ex-narc a CDL, when he couldn't even drive my car (because his was a clunker) without almost getting into accidents. I guess that was probably on purpose.
@ Mine was a cop. They go through extensive driving training as well.
Had a "friend" who had a walk like your sister, it was so exaggerated I spotted her while at the tip of a slide at a water park..I was not wearing my glasses, how could I not see it🤦🏾♀️😂😂😂
Danish! Your channel is getting better and better all the time!
I like the smart professional background
I have witnessed the fast style, my ex used to do it to me all the time ! We would go for a walk and soon she would be out of sight. The last time I took a walk with her she did it and I met her at the bottom of the hill (2 miles) didn’t say a word to her and proceeded to run up the hill, needless to say when she arrived back home , she was pissed, laughed at me for running and insulted me for doing so, I just smiled, but I think it said something to her, and that’s when the discard began , how dare I give her the same treatment she had given me every time we walked, they don’t want a shared experience, you are not worthy of that, it’s all about what you can contribute to their experience or not, depending on what twisted phase of their game they are in.
This had always hurted me and I didn’t know why he did this( my husband). Now I know.
My parents were narcissits, Handled me like an object, I was always wrong. No matter which effort I Made. I was meant to bê the adult in the Room when needed and the Baby as well. Uncomfortable.My First husband was an over one, my second one a covert one.Unfortunately I took the critic Inside of me until I realized what this was all about.
I divorced my second husband and thanks to Danish and others I now know I Chose what I was familiar with.
I still struggle but improving Seven years later.
You were already in the discard if she was literally leaving you behind on a walk! Good for you to go for a jog when you did! That’s hilarious. Glad you’re free.
My husband used to walk ahead of me, and I couldn’t keep up with his pace. Meanwhile, my mother-in-law would always walk behind me, and I could feel her eyes on my back the entire time. It made me so uncomfortable back then when I was young and hanging out with her-it was horrible, and this video brought those memories back.
Mine did the same. My mother-in-law tried to walk behind me with my kids. I felt like I was walking alone.
@@janelle76monster in law smh
Wow you sound paranoid.
@@michaelfrank5239 Perhaps you're exactly the type who constantly disregards others' feelings, behaves rudely, and thrives on being toxic. If that's the case, it's no wonder you're facing backlash.
@@michaelfrank5239 Perhaps you're exactly the type who constantly disregards others' feelings, behaves rudely, and thrives on being toxic. If that's the case, it's no wonder you're facing backlash.
Another example of him not caring about my needs was when I was in labour. There was only one chair by the registration desk at the hospital and he sat in it, forcing me to stand with contractions only 1 minute apart.
That’s horrible! The level of entitlement is unreal.
Mine went and got coffee and breakfast when I was in the last hour of labor- many times- once he sat and read a newspaper when I was ready to go in for surgery.
OMG what an ass, Im so sorry 💔
@C21agent1 ty. I'm just glad we are divorced and I am nc now
Many times walked around with his hands in his pockets. I know all too well about these monsters. Married to one for 50 years sad to say. Life of torment. RUN AWAY PEOPLE. NOTHING IS WORTH PUTTING UP WITH THEIR ABUSE!!😢
You are spot on. Mine walked with hands in his pockets or with sunglasses all the time. 😂
my mom ALWAYS walks ahead of me and my dad. It’s like her superiority of “follow the leader” unlike My dad that always walks with me (thankfully)
She did this to me when I was little trying to keep up with her as well, I constantly got lost everywhere and was an anxiety filled child. That caused me so much stress I shouldn’t have had at that age. There’s only so fast you can walk (without RUNNING) when you’re 5-10 years old with short legs
My mom did that too. I remember losing sight of her when I was little and I was so scared. When you're little you can't see over the tops of the clothing. It's only in recent years that people have been talking about narcissism that I realized she's a narcissist. Now she's 88 and has bad pain in her legs and needs a walker.
My husband would walk way ahead of me and our daughters at an amusement park or something- so we just sat down on a bench to see how far he would walk until he realized no one was behind him. 😂.
Wow! I have been harassed, stalked and everything evil by a tenant in my building. Malignant, cruel and deceptive. YES, THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT SHE DOES! Grandiose, head up marching like a General with hands behind her back and, yes, with that smirk on her face. Intruding on people. No boundaries, she bullies and subjugates others. She either follows me or blindsides me to block my access. Both of which require watching me and planning her attacks, changing her routine and direction exactly as I change mine in trying to avoid her. I carry my phone to document as this has done much harm to me and my health. 😢
I had a casual long distance situationship off and on for 10 years with a man that I went to see while he was working. I drove 4 hours to stay the night. When I arrived he asked if I wanted to go to the mall because he wanted to buy something. I struggled to keep up as he walked purposefully, barely noticing that I was about 20 feet behind him the entire time. Internally, I told myself I was the problem because I couldn’t keep up. He and I didn’t see each other for 7 more years until he drive thru my city on his way to his next job site and he reached out. I went to see him and stayed the night and the next morning he walked significantly ahead of me until we parted ways in the garage with a quick hug and kiss.
I’m the kind of person that thinks I have to accept what little I can get. My mom use to tell me that I needed too much love and always made me feel bad for wanting.
Your mother set you up for failed relationships as an adult, as did my own.
My ex always walked behind to “see who I was looking at” and who was looking at me! And then accuse me of flirting and threaten me and their target. He even hit me a few times when I didn’t admit to the flirting he just KNEW I was doing…that I never actually did 😢
I went thru the same exact thing. One night, after accusing me of looking at men in the casino, he started beating me in the car while he was driving.
I hope you left him before it gets worst
I hope this story is past tense. As in you left
They're extremely insecure and jealous. They will literally convince themselves through delusional hallucinations that you're cheating and all the ways you would cheat and who you would cheat with. It's an obsessive fanatasy of theirs. They will always watch you and stare at you, trying to imagine what you would do, who you would do it with and how you would do it. Because that's how THEY would do it. The most absurd narcissists will cheat on you because they fantasized about you cheaten on them first. Their insane ego can be challenged through pure imagination. They're sick people who cause nothing but misery in the end.
😞❤️
Omg, the puffed up polar bear. Love it 🤣
That's sooo him. It's embarrassing.
But I used to think it was a competition thing. He always had to be first, or the smartest, the biggest, the fastest, had to win at everything. Makes me feel sick to think I tried too see the good in that monster.
Mine always walked ahead of me, when I was dying from bleeding ulcers, he did that as we were walking into the ER
Thank you for this video. Somehow, I never connected that his walking behavior was narcissistic! It seems extremely clear now. He always walks ahead of me - unless walking with me will give him supply for some reason. We would go to the grocery store and I'd catch up, then stop to take something from the shelf and he would be around the next isle with the cart. I was always losing him, chasing him around the store with my arms loaded with groceries to put into the cart. Hiking, cycling, airports, everywhere, I'm left trailing 10 feet behind. I'm not slow, he just plows ahead quickly - and goes faster when I about catch up.
Thank you for posting this. NOW it makes sense to me too. My EX husband did the same thing to me for 18 years, everywhere. I felt so disrespected & humiliated by his actions. We're BOTH fast walkers, but he always insisted on walking 10 paces ahead of me. One time I finally said, "Wait up! It's NOT a competition!" His response, "You have to KEEP UP", as he looked back at me. Yet, when walking with guy friends, he was always walking shoulder to shoulder. For our 3rd anniversary, we went to dinner in San Francisco with another couple. It was dark & after parking the car, my husband walked shoulder to shoulder, next to THEM, to the restaurant for 3 city blocks, leaving me walking BEHIND them. He never once looked back to see if I was there. He was/is a self righteous ass & actually told me once that HE thinks HE'S better than other people 😮. I don't miss that dictator.
Nothing with these monsters can ever be normal. When I was 10, I wouldn't walk near narc mother, as she has this tendency of tripping people with her feet just walking. But the irony is that they can wield the power of pretense of appearing to be more than normal to others. Just go no-contact and run!
Yep..I did
My husband walked so far ahead of me during an outing that I turned around & went back home. He was shocked - but I was home 15 minutes before he got back. Last time we went anywhere “together.”
I just want to say thank you. Your posts are so powerful and healing. I love that you can covey so much wisdom and affirmation in a reasonable amount of time. Just sooooo helpful. THANK YOU
Visiting my daughter in Australia (from NZ) we walked to the local shopping centre. On leaving, each of us carrying 2 bags loaded with groceries, she strode on way ahead of me. I ran across 4 busy lanes of traffic up the hill and proceeded on in front of her as she waited to cross at the lights. When she finally caught up, she asked incredulously 'were you running?'
He has walked ahead of me for 11 years. I’ve talked about it since we met and he still does it. I started noticing when I catch up to him, he turns to see me out of his side eye and speeds up. It makes me feel like I’m constantly chasing him or we’re racing. I’ve also noticed he will walk right past other women who are waiting in lines without asking if they’re waiting or whatnot. I called him out on it once when it was painfully obvious he jumped in a line because I didn’t want to be seen as so rude. He also yells at women in public when social faux pas happen. He only acts this way with women, never men. I hope I don’t make it to 13 years with this man.😢
He's a coward and a bully.
After my third c section he came to pick me up( the second child he didn’t show up) the nurse asked if I wanted a wheelchair, he said no. Walked way ahead of me and picked a fight about how the car seat was supposed to go.
Another occasion he hit himself in the face, until black and blue wore his worn house clothes insisting we go to the store after I got out of work ( full dress and make up) hold the kids hand and walk far enough behind to make it look pitiful
My ex narc husband walked hand in hand with his mother every time, leaving me to follow..... and the horrible thing I was towards the last few weeks of my pregnancy. Yes the cult always walked together either ahead or lagged behind.
Each and every word you are telling is true. My husband never allow me to walk in front of him. He push me side and walk in front. His body language is so arrogant. When we walk, he always try to push me on the side of the road and walk in front giving me no space to walk. Shame on him.
Damn Shirley. Are you going to tolerate that?
😡 No more!!!
You’re right on with the walking ahead. I’ve known, seen, and heard of many a narcissist doing this.
Oh, the walking ahead makes sense 😢 and none of them showed empathy when I asked them to wait up.
Or they purposely walk unreasonably slow then scold you for walking to fast! Like if you can’t walk normal tell me before hand a walk isn’t a beneficiary walk if it’s less than 3 miles an hour dottling is pointless!
@joanbaczek2575 Or their legs are a lot shorter and/or they aren't in shape compared to the person walking faster than them and they are upset because of the lack of consideration from the taller/more fit person.
@joanbaczek2575 If you are walking with an elderly person ; it's going to be really slow. You walk with them for the company and take time for exercise on your own time.
My grandma used to walk painfully slow but I always showed her respect and patience.
My toxic extreme narc brother saunters with this sway back and belly out. As a teen, the family used to comment on how he always walked 50' ahead or behind the rest of us.
The "sway back and belly out" had my howling! I totally recognize that walk!
I think he is just trying to keep.up or get ahead tbh....😅
My husband does that with his mother! Always goes in front of me until it comes to checkout the items!!!! Then I go in front to pay for everything every time … been going on for many years.
Mine walked like a slippery shoulders hubched and just looked nervous 24/7. Then depending on the situation he would switch to super confident. Its like i could see the wheels turning to manipulate ppl depending on who he was around.
Hello Danish! I always wondered why when we were walking together he ALWAYS had to be ahead of me and he was moving at a fast pace . Thank you for the clarification ❤️
I have experienced all
Me too!❤❤❤
From day one. My family, friends, boyfriends....I call it surround sound.
Ditto. First time was when we went shopping after honeymoon, to use wedding present money. I was pregnant, he ran ahead, scolded me for not keeping up, would not let me rest, stop for tea, just complained at my slowness. That was 57 years ago. We stayed married for 22 years. He took me for a walk one day, I thought he was at last willing to walk next to me, but he said "I want to leave you!" I sympathise and asked him when do you want to go, can I help you find a place to stay?
Now who would have thought that "walking" would be a topic attached to a narcissist? Danish you have detailed and explained this so well. Mine did it always ahead and walked as though he had some important matter to attend to. Even walking the dog together. So irritating. Or he walked behind so I couldn't see his beady snake eyes taking in the people around us, scoping them out, to zero in on which one he should impress or ego stroke the most. It was physically impossible for him to walk beside me. When I started asking him about his behavior and odd habits walking he would answer No I'm not! Or Yes I am! Like a defensive little brat. Lord have mercy!
Ughh, goodbye
Next time they walk so far in front of you, just turn around and go somewhere else..home, perhaps..I'm sure I've done this before..summising that they were not comfy walking with me, I gave up x
Upon leaving the hospital with our newborn he took off ahead with the baby and no thought to staying with me let alone helping me (they don't make you leave in a wheelchair after giving birth in ontario). Needless to say I was in pain and needed support.
It's interesting and helpful to learn these common behaviors. I left 13 years ago but he is still abusive at every opportunity.
Next time let us all choose someone we don't need to adjust to
Say that again
It should come naturally.
@@SimplyD4 did u mean u can say that again. Or say that again to understand. Like joanne said it has to come naturally. Like idiots we are understanding them and understanding them they pretend like we are not getting them. All are pretense to make us run from one goal post to another
that can only happen when we heal from root wounds.....it leads us too 'choose' wrong as it's sadly and scarily familiar :(
@@Jennifer-gr7hn very true. Danish is giving us perspectives. Till we realize we won’t accept what is being said. 2 years b4 I married ex itself someone told me u hate yourself do u know that. I didn’t understand I kept choosing people who treated me like shit while being overconfident about my likability
My husband doesn’t go anywhere with his mom but all of his attention is always toward our daughter in public. He gives her the attention he should be giving to me. Unless it’s inappropriate. He will do stuff to me like grab my behind or nibble my neck. My 11 even told me it’s inappropriate. I see the narcissist now. He is definitely one.
During chemo, one day we had to to sams. Coming out of the store, he raced ahead of me, it's what he does, I saw a teenage Chinese boy and his grandfather pushing their cart, I asked the boy if I could hold onto his arm to walk to the car, which he nicely said yes.
Walking down the middle of the sidewalk, so the other person has to walk in the gutter, on the shoulder, or behind. They also walk a lot faster than the other person can comfortably do.
Oh Boy- i needed this: it sooo made me laugh & chuckle 😂.
Childhood trauma survivor from covert religious community narc mom!
Sometimes laughter trully IS the best medicine.
Id say "marching style"-
We constantly got our marching orders.
OMG my husband is a former marine, he always has walked ahead of me and ate his food so fast never savoring or enjoying the meal as if he was shoveling his food in his mouth I would ask him why? He said in the Marines you had to eat fast on the go all the time and it’s been a habit since, but the walking ahead nah ah don’t think it’s a veteran thing now that I watched this, it makes so much sense, and his bullying, tormenting, ghosting, punishing slights, gaslighting, invalidating, lies and talks over you doesn’t give you a chance to talk, a conversation he thinks is an argument, chaotic 33 yrs of marriage and substance abuse and alcohol also, although he no longer drinks or does substances because his body could no longer tolerate it or it would be detrimental to his health, that in itself is another story yrs and yrs of that, he’s moody, mind games, no empathy, walking on egg shells that’s the word of who he truly is a NARCISSIST wow!!!!
Why are you still married to him?
You need to leave him. I'm an ex marine, and that is NO excuse to act like that towards you. He's using that as an excuse for his behavior.
I married my ex in part because he was so affectionate towards his elderly mother. I was taught that that was a good sign! I later came to call her “the only woman he ever loved.”
The narcissist will never move over to allow you to go first.
My dad.😫
unless to show the 'show' to others.
The narcissist in my little world walks all puffed up like she is the most important thing in the room. She stops and talks to everyone and fills them full of flattery because she needs to be the best, the favorite, the most popular., and better than anyone else in the world. She walks over the top of people whom she sees as inferior and when she causes enough havoc in their life, she swoops in, wanting to be their savior.
I so agree with this! My narc walks behind me everywhere. I see him smiling at everyone, if I turn around or slow down he stops smiling immediately! He smiles so much many people don’t even acknowledge me, they only look at him. Even men give him all the attention. They stare at him right past me. I’ve asked him about it but he denies what he does! Yet he will attack me if someone happens to talk to me or notice me!
Can't believe what I am hearing about the walking patterns and even eating patterns of a narrcissist......it explains so much of what I experienced.....always wondered what made him tick ??? The biggest of these is the love and attention he gave his Mother.....which I thought was a good sign......SOOO WRONG WAS I. I found out the hard way.....his Mother was his ONE TRUE LOVE !!!
I have traumatic brain injury and we make videos for other people who have it. I tried to stay out of the relationship video because of my past with a narcissist but I was encouraged to offer something so I spoke about how much you can learn about a person when you’re holding hands. They could try to control where you go, give in to wherever you go or they can discuss their direction. A narcissist, or at least mine, doesn’t hold hands for the same exact reasons you have highlighted in your video, so thank you so much!
My narcissist father would always walk behind us, they never walk with you, they either walk ahead of you or behind you.
Being in a car with Someone like my father used to bê a Cage, no escape. Like sunday Morning breakfasts, so I Skipped this in my teenage years.His favorites were to ask me questions Not meeting my age and Knowledge, só he was the brilliant one the who had the Right answer.
Me too. My ex walked far behind. They’re watching you and any interactions with other people. I found out to my horror, he made gestures and mean faces behind my back when I was talking to someone.
I love your podcasts. You are spot on.
Lol😂 Narcs love the chase! Im reading comments and i just got the biggest confirmation, they love the feeling of being pursued. They're wired to want to be wanted and if they have a trail of people behind them trying to keep up, in their mind, they're in control in that moment. It's not competition It's a sense of being chased or wanted.
Cool video, Danish. My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her
its difficult to let go of someone you love, i was in a similar situation, my relationship of 12 years ended, but i couldnt just let him go i did all i could to get him back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual counselor who helped me bring him back
Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do i reach him or her?
Her name is Shelly renee white , and she is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive
You have to just know that eventually you will be over her. Time will heal this wound. I know because I've been through it more than once.
If she was a narcissist, then you are not thinking straight right now. She lied to you and betrayed you. Why would you want her back?
You don't need a "spiritual counselor" to help get her back. That is ridiculous. You need to move on. Occupy your mind with other things. It will be hard but you'll get there.
The ministry of funny walks has a whole back catalogue that can be aligned to narcissistic behaviours...i remember my dad walking in front of my mother and us kids and been very proud of how fast he walked.😅....we had great days out without him.
I know the narcissists very well and already observed these types of walking styles. But you are the first person to point it out, analyse it and make it public. It conforts me on my observation and I feel understood. So, thank you very much for this video ! 😊
He always walked ahead of me, even when I was very pregnant. Such an asshole
Repetition compulsion survivor; scapegoat in family system.
Every single one had some way of holding their body in the world to compensate or to send a specific message. They work to normalize their own mental biases and want to believe in that normalization, they believe most of the public judges individuals in petty ways like they do. It is a painful way to live! It means they must be self conscious even with the way they walk in public.
My first ex bf (grandiose, thinks he's a lawyer type) coached me, "Do not make space for others on the sidewalk. Keep walking and looking perfectly straight, and they'll make space or go around you." This was because I put one foot off the sidewalk to allow a family with a few kids to pass on the sidewalk. He said it again during an event a few months later. It took me the second time to grasp that he really believed people are assigned actual meaningful value and social power, all based on their posture and gaze when they pass each other on the sidewalk.
My LORD their worlds are so teeny tiny!! Imagine being so limited that the way someone passes you on a sidewalk could seriously set you off for the entire day. 😂
The first layer of deconditioning, I learned I didnt have to fear all that stuff. I thought my mom was anxious and trying to help me, in her own way. The second layer, I learned that she wanted me to be afraid of those things, but actually wasn't scared of them herself.
I really didn't get it until i understood the character disordered vs neurotic spectrum from George Simon.
I am a fast walker, but when I don't walk alone or with people who walk the same pace, I adapt to the velocity of the other one(s), even though it gives me sort of anxiety when I have to walk much slower than usual
Sport on with covert. It was an observation i had with my ex wife. She played everyone! She made false allegations , but, someone so shy / nice couldn’t possibly be lying. Different person at home. Finally 3 years of family court battles , she was found malicious , all her false allegation come to light and I now have 50/50 shared care of my kids.
We got to the check out line in the grocery store when he says he forgot the milk. Which happened to be in the farthest back corner of the store, knowing I would have to run all the way to retrieve it because we were holding up other people. All this is so true. It’s over now. 🙏🏽♥️🤗
Go for a wedding ceremony- they never stay near wife and family or for a picture with own family
Then you see him standing with others men or women for pictures and having active conversations
My narc ex would walk faster than me and I had to catch up to him, but also he would constantly judge me about the way I walked. At the grocery store he would waste a hell lot of time in deciding what he wanted and did not care what I want, he wouldn't let me buy anything and would judge my every decision in buying things.
Are you free of him now? 🙏
I'm finally free of mine. After telling him a few home truths about his diabolical behaviour.. Give him both barrels & he went silent
He's lost interest now he knows he can't control me. Just proves it was never about love because they're incapable. Control is all they want. Well I'm worth more than that & so are you.. 🙏
@@DJPeachyful Yes I'm free from his control. Those days with him were exhausting. I felt huge sense of relief the day he left.
@@DJPeachyful I'm glad you are free and you called him out. Yes they definitely lose interest when they see you stronger and happier. When I texted my ex saying that I'm doing good n with a smile, he just blocked me lol.
@@DJPeachyful Thank you, yes we are worth more and we deserve much better.
The walking fast ahead ,I know that one, not putting up with it with someone again. Also, the one where you make a suggestion about something, they do the opposite, so immature.
Oh Mr Danish you know these monsters so well😂!
Thank you so much for exposing them aoul vampires !
❤ from Nigeria
I experienced the walking ahead, my ex would get mad at me for trying to keep, he said I always had to race him.
Getting out of the car not fast enough. I was constantly lectured about being to slow on purpose.
I’m a recovered victim. The person had every walking style except the hands behind the back. This just helps me know how true all of this is thinking back. Thank you.
I HAVE A FRIEND WHO USED TO DITCH ME AT THE FURNITURE STORE…IT MAKES ME SUSPICIOUS AND THEN SHE WOULD CALL ME AND COMPLAIN TO ME ABOUT NOT BEING ABLE TO REACH ME, BECAUSE OF THE BAD RECEPTION, IN THE STORE. I GUESS SHE IS ONE TOO. IT IS A CRUEL WORLD.
At 1st my narc hub walked ahead of me by 5 feet or so. But since I like to walk fast, he resorted to walking 5 feet behind me. After church, he was the last to leave even when i said that I needed to leave right afterwards because I had something to do. A couple of times he ran the car off the road on purpose so I stopped riding with him. Eventually, he filled up his car with trash so that there was no space for anyone to sit!! 😅
Spot on. They are exhausting. Hard that people believe their gaslighting of victim.
You are spot on with this. It has been my experience for a very long time now. My sick husband decided to start treating his own daughter, like a girlfriend when she went through puberty and became more developed. It was disgusting for me to watch them, hold hands and walk in front of me like they were a couple and I would be left behind wherever we went. She admitted to her boyfriend that this was very strange part of her life now that she is dating and almost married, and that at some point in her adolescence, she felt like her dad was her boyfriend. So it is evident that the message he was sending to herwas not made up by me and was an actual feeling that he gave her. How confusing for someone going through puberty to experience these feelings towards their own father
So spot on. Every single word resonates with what I faced. The person in my life had every single character you mentioned, every type of display in different scenario.
I was just explaining about John's peculiar walk to a friend of mine earlier today. I was saying that he could easily be spotted in a large crowd for his strange walk. It's a bit like a waddling Penguin. His legs seem to bend outwards.
How is this narcissistic?
Exactly the way my son-in-law walks!
My ex boyfriend would do this, walk very fast ahead of me while hiking and I would ask him why he did this and he would say that I'm walking too slow when I wasn't 🤔. I would think even if I did walk slow why wouldn't he walk with his girlfriend 🤔🤔. Great video, thanks!.?
My ex always walked ahead of me. He’d also disappear from me in stores. He also parked his car at the furthest possible point from the other cars. It’s ridiculous.
yeah standing and walking with head high, walking faster than others, taking all the space in public, talking loud to others to terrify them and talking on phone without any reason in public places to send the message that they don't recognize others in their surroundings or pretend that they are not alone, they have company and they are not getting bored like in waiting areas or elevators or waiting for elevators.
Spotted one do the cell phone extra loud talk entrance into a room because he wanted everyone to notice he had a new phone and after the call get all the attention discussing and showing off the new cell phone.
Bravo! Another home run! So true!! It always puzzled.me! Alsays walked far ahead or behind! Never hand in hand or as a couple /family!
My ex partner 3years i was with him but he wasn't with me. He only took me out to dinner once. That's when we first met. This horrible man called me so much horrible names any special day he would spoil it my birthday Christmas .he always goes missing for 3 months then comes back like nothing happened
Evil people
Wow! So very true’ I could tell many stories!
I was married to a narcissist for 25 yrs. Now I know why he always walked ahead of me and when I would ask him to slow down it always caused a problem. Thank you!!!
Wow, that was freakishly accurate 😮!!!
I have always wondered why so many of our traumas involved “occasions”, such as shopping malls. Etc! As you said, you would be disciplined if everything didn’t go 100% as expected. My husband would walk far ahead and be tall, so we had to run practically! And yes, he’s still holding her hand 26 years after marriage. (6 years separated - in the process of divorce). She’s the enabler. His family were a “cultish tribe”, for lack of better words, and when they got the church under their belt, I was excommunicated when I escaped the dangerous situation I was in and got a protection order. Within 3 days, they had the kids turned against me.
The walking styles and those open-arm gestures - SPOT ON!!! He would stretch out his arms like that. He would answer a call, laugh hard and joke on the phone calls right in the middle of a blow-up! He would snap and click his hands together as he walked. He was always paranoid about the property perimeter and would always do checks, often with his pistol and his pitbull; he had even let the pitbull chase someone before who was stealing cables. I would think that was normal. He would fire shots into the air and try to catch the intruders. I was living with adrenaline flowing through me 24/7!
One big thing - He would whistle. Whenever he was in the zone of silent treatment as punishment, he would whistle, (silent treatment would go
on for days.)😅 Projection all the time ...are you having an affair, etc, and in the meantime, he was having quickies (which I could never prove, but I know they were happening at his jaunts). I am so grateful I got away; the Dr said I wouldn't have survived another 7 months (I ended up having a TIA and many health issues)
My husband and a female friend of his raced out ahead of me at the shopping center. I’d recently had spinal cord surgery and needed a walker to get around. I couldn’t even attempt to keep up. They loudly discussed how dramatic I was being. She said the epidural she’d had years prior was the same as the procedure I had undergone. He agreed with her calling me a drama queen, knowing that she was wrong. I quit trying to catch up and went into a cafe. Of course when they finally found me I was berated for not considering the needs of the group. I was not allowed to turn my head or reach for any reason at that point in my recovery. That was the moment I realized I had married a narcissist. But at least his friend had a lovely vacation during my recuperation period .
Thank you so much Danish for sharing your knowledge. It is so true. I am 67 and a couple of years ago I realised that my husband and my girlfriend plus certain family members are narcissists, thanks to channels like yours. It is devastating to think that I wasted my whole life on narcissists. My husband has always walked fast ahead of me, rushes madly around the supermarket doing his own thing and so does my girlfriend, the same. They are both very controlling and heartless. I’m too old to leave my husband unless I win the lottery but I see much less of my friend and at least I have finally learnt to see through all the belittling going on. 🙏⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Thank you for your videos. They help me 3 years after managing to divorce my covert narc. He ALWAYS walked ahead of me....
Spot on!!