This guy Asmussen needs to spell his name right. Assmussen, lol. It's so hard to believe people this stupid actually walk the earth. In dinosaur days he would have been some animals dinner. I don't know what's sadder, that a guy like that probably votes or that the shallow gene pool that spawned him will more than likely be reproduced three or four times over!
The actor playing the Al Qaeda is just amazing. "If you spent months planning something reallly special" "Why is Osama bin Laden safe in .... somewhere" "Me and Bush, we go out, we hang" 😂😂
Over 400 likes and not one comment? Not buying that at all. Seriously. Over 400 likes and not one comment? Even the anti-conspiracy theorists must be having internal dialog in their tell-a-vision addled, fluoridated minds. But they can never say anything because it's unpopular to disbelieve the official narrative. Anti-conspiracy theorists are some of the most dangerous people. They ALWAYS believe the government/corporate narrative. Deep down they are all Liberals. The only way Liberal ideology wins is with massive censorship, intimidation, violence and government expansion. Their ideas cannot win in a free market. Give them a polygraph about their own ideologies and most of them will fail.
1:02 "How would you feel if you spent 2 months in the mountain caves sleeping on rocks planning on something really special only for someone else to take credit." I felt that in my soul 😂😂
Such retards in the comments section, you fucks believe everything they put in front of you. Whilst you never even seen actual footage of Osoma getting killed, you never seen how those planes got hijacked, it’s bullshit, wake your asses up, maybe find some ACTUAL proof that’s not found on some website and then state your brainless statements in the comments section
Do you think this is how the Egyptians feel when people say aliens built the pyramids Edit: it appears I’ve accidentally created a war zone between Arab nationalists, African nationalists, Egyptian nationalists, and conspiracy theorists
Now its Jews Africans Syrians Indians built the pyramids and the Egyptians were just playing in the Nile (somehow and IDK why, some people didn't understand that it was a sarcasm and thought that I was really saying Indians built the pyramid, I mean for the Love of God what is wrong with you.)
The funniest part about this in retrospect is that Modern Day Debate or some other big online debate show could actually host a debate between an Al Qaeda member and a 9/11 truther on this exact topic and that honestly wouldn't be that out of place.
Not really. We could easily compare the comments from past time to current time and measure the difference. Anti conspiracy theorists are r333tards. All of them. Total losers
To be fair, Taliban is now the official government in Afghanistan and has de facto control over its territory, so this is going to happen soon. They've already appointed ambassadors to a few Asian countries' embassies, ousting the previous dudes.
@@cleopatrasrevengeoh man remember when former taliban soldiers started complaining on twitter about getting stuck doing office work so they could actually start running things? it truly felt like something the onion would come up with but it was real life
HOW WOULD YOU LIKE IT IF YOU SPEND 2 MONTH UP IN A MOUNTAIN CAVE, SLEEPING ON *ROCKS* , PLANNING SOMETHING REALLY SPECIAL, THEN SOMEONE COMES AND TAKES CREDIT
David Musial it doesnt have to. All the top 15% has to do is crush ONE single floor. Once that happens, the resulting momentum will crush the next floor, which adds even more momentum and weight to the top. Floor after floor after floor, exactly what we see on 9/11.
Me. This is basically ISIS right now lmao. William Gerard is Russia trying to Ukraine for an islamic terror attack. And the Al Kaida guy is ISIS openly and proudly admitting that they did it and release more and more bodycam footage to prove it. And western intelligence agencies also confirm that ISIS did it and have even warned Russia 2 weeks in advance of an imminent islamic terror attack.
@@Mr.Stizblee I love how later Fox News did an interview with him and asked him if he meant Obama and Clinton simply created the environment that eventually gave birth to ISIS, and he said no, they quite literally founded ISIS xD
@@DynamicGracer 5 years later you comment. Lol and the video is from 2008 on top on all that I just happen to watch and see your comment a few hours after you posted it. Feels weird. I use to watch the onion years ago and watching the newest Rogan podcast with Penn they mentioned the onion and it caused me to look them up to see if they still make videos. And to my surprise they still do! Anyways it's strange how alot of the comments seem either very recent or very old.
@@the_original_Bilb_Ono they don't They sold themselves to a different company haha And I commented just to alert you just in case you didn't know you had 3.8k likes
The whole “why is his approval rating in el-hammam” joke is so underrated. El Hammam means “The Bathhouse” but also means “The Toilet” in Arabic. He’s saying George Bush’s ratings are in the shitter.
Same. Russia is William Gerard blaming Ukraine for an islamic terror attack, without any evidence. The Al Kaida guy is ISIS openly (and proudly) admitting that they did it and release more and more bodycam footage to prove it. Western intelligence agencies also confirm that ISIS did it. Russia is a real life "The Onion" sketch lol. The stupidity and brazen lies of the russian government truly are something else
They cant even speak or act and they try and imitate people from middle east by gettin a man to wear a scarf and yeh thats it they know people will believe anything they see or hear. Shame on the media for resorting to these tactics finally people can see through it.
The “2 months in mountain caves” line is so good, does anyone else remember when the newspapers thought that we couldn’t find Bin Laden because he somehow hollowed out a cave and all the terrorists were hiding in it? There was a whole diagram about how it would work and what it looked like, and then it turned out that he was just in a fuckin house
The crazy part is that was a fictional diagram from times of London and Rumsfeld went on "meet the press" and passed it off as real saying "not just one there are MANY of those" edit: I found the video lol: ruclips.net/video/FGhGHxw0mSo/видео.html
One time I let a guy stay with me to help him out, but he screwed me over and dipped out the last month without paying the rent. I found out where he was staying and went over to his house and smashed all the windows on his truck which cost a lot more money than that last month's rent. I checked Facebook and he blamed it on someone else. Apparently he was a huge douche to a lot of people and I wasn't the most recent person he ripped off. I was relieved to not have to worry about facing retaliation or legal issues but part of me still wanted him to know I did it.
Which adds even more humor to the situation, the white guy is trying to frame it as "just asking questions" and "keeping an open mind" but if you were the terrorist responsible you know that's not what he's doing.
This actually sort of happened in real life. Al Qaeda got angry with Ahmadinejad for espousing 9/11 conspiracy theories and claimed he just hated Sunnis and didn't want to give them credit.
the reason i like ahmadinejad is because he makes it easier to know what is true and what isnt, for example if you see ahmadinejad saying literally anything you can add that to the list of things that arent true when if he didnt say it u maybe wouldnt know its lie for sure
"Bush's administration they're a den of jackals, we certainly have common ground there" holy shit the jokes the onion puts in these videos come at us so fast its easy to miss them, but theyre all gold
That's not even a joke, that's just reality. The real al quaeda would have no problem with this portrayal I am sure. That's the point, that this is reality and the fact that it's so stupid is why reality in this case is onion worthy. The ONLY thing stopping this interview from happening in real life is al quaeda staying hidden.
@@hitlerjusthitlerliterallyh2700 not that different from alternative media on RUclips. Look at crowder and other loonies, conning their audience, being caught red handed and still their audience in denial can’t put 2 and 2 together, coming back for more. It’s darn right sad how extremeified and blindfolded the US population has gotten over the last 10 years. Other major player countries aren’t doing any better either. This kettle is about to come to a boil, it’s easy to rile up people, it takes effort for everyone to calm down.
@@hitlerjusthitlerliterallyh2700 For very different reasons, right winger hate the MSM cause they wont air conspiracy theories, its no the same as anti-war protesters that hate them cause they cheer for foreingh interventions, or other kinds of people with legitimate grivances
This is the kind of good satire that comes back. I see people talking about several attacks, but let’s not forget the joke at its core; conspiracies are nuts.
not really a conspiracy, especially if somehow 2.3 trillion dollars disappear from the pentagon, the CIA once planned to harm its own citizens to justify an invasion of Cuba after the Bay of Pigs failed
“Why is his approval rating in al-hamam” LOL as an Arab (and Muslim) I LOVED THAT haha. Although al-hamam is generally used as “bathroom” and not specifically “toilet”.
Yeah but no. The buildings should not have fallen like they did. It looks a lot like a controlled demolition with explosives and that is probably what happened
@@christophermalthe1818 -- no they don't look like controlled demolitions at all. In controlled demolition the collapse begins at the base, in both towers it initiated at the impacted zones. There were no sounds of perimeter or core columns being blown out. Parts of the buildings, such as a large piece of the core of the North tower even remained intact for a brief period after the collapse. Its not consistent at all with controlled demolition but its absolutely consistent with catastrophic failure of the structure at the impacted floors.
911ambulancegirl me and Bush we go out we hang that was funny. Bin Laden isn't safe and is a coward didn't even go out the way he tells his followers to go out.
The writing is amazing but the real miracle are those two anonymous actors perfectly reproducing this style of debate, keeping to the script and making it look like they are speaking from the top of their heads. Bravo.
@@shooby9496 I think it’s more so the direction given to them by the Onion. Audiences often easily overlook the fact that good direction to the actors by directing staff creates good acting. The reason the Onion has consistently good acting in their videos is because they gave great direction to their actors to truly let them shine in their performances. People compare this to Hollywood, which they should, because these decade old Onion clips are beating them at their own game. Hollywood has an abundance of talented actors, and a shortage of talented directors who can give adequate directions to the actors in their roles. The end result is horrid acting that is mostly the fault of shoddy direction. Yet, audiences blame the actors because all they see is what’s on screen, the actors giving a terrible performance. So the actors shoulder the blame and are left with tarnished careers, while the directors responsible get away scot free to ruin more movies. TLDR: The acting industry has a problem, that problem is the directing industry. The Onion has consistently great acting because the directors on staff are good at their jobs.
Some reports indicated they came from Mexico near the Baja region but those were erroneous. Turns out they were really from London. Three angry young men from the Southern Baha region had in fact sought the perpetrators of the releasing of said dogs but to no avail. A vigil will be held in 2021 for the twenty year anniversary of the dogs being let out.
@@wizard7314 Not sure about what he's talking about, but there is a 2011 ABCnews article that mentions Al Qaeda was angry at an Iranian official for believing the conspiracy.
+Adam A It's right up there, but the "Do You Remember Life Before the Segway" video might be funnier. And the congressman reading into the congressional record his description of how he killed a hobo is pretty damned good, too- "hobo" is just an inherently funny word.
Ive never been a big fan of the onion mainly because its just not my brand of humor usually. But oh my gosh this is absolutely hilarious. By far my favorite thing from them.
Reck Yourself Chrissakes, Onion and clickhole videos are full of comments like yours. Why wouldn’t he know it’s satire? It’s not hard to spot. It’s not even like he confused you because he was playing along with it or anything, just made a little comment
humour is everywhere in 2020. a 0.018% global death rate is named a pandemic since it was 0.00001%, and a global scale, fascist economic collapse is needed to produce more deaths, because otherwise the measures would bring no change to deaths. there are millions other jokes out there, but remember, don't go out without your mask. you and your grandpa may live longer than life expectancy if you act THAT irresponsibly.
i kept hoping our al Qaeda spokesman would say "I lost friends in 9/11, this is simply abhorrent to me"
"Our"?
You just ended up on a watchlist somewhere lmao
Underrated comment lol
I love it HAHAHHAA
😂😂😂
@@carsonapplebaum2266Well it does mean The Base. I mean maybe it's all encompassing.
I love how "the mainstream media's just too afraid to have me on" is followed by "And here's a spokesman from Al Qaeda..."
Meanwhile Taliban ruling an entire country & going on media about world peace.
Reality is stranger than fiction
Hahaha didn’t catch thatXD
I miss the Old Onion
😆
Didn't he say "muslim mainstream media" ?
This is ISIS rn after their attack in Russia
lmao, so true
Crazy world where terrorists have to prove their own guilt to stop opportunist scumbags from shifting the blame to other parties.
Knew I wasnt the only one who thought of this video
@@this_is_patrickTerrorists vs terrorists
@@AIagremm first time I've seen it I was going down an alex jones rabbit hole
14 years later, the eyeroll with "oh here we go..." still makes me cry every time
He almost laughed himself lmao
You agree with a terrorist group. That makes you a crazy person.
15 years later and it turned into reality with ISIS trying to convince the world, it was truly them, who committed the attacks in Moscow.
"And why is Bin Laden safe in...uh...somewhere."
Thomas Asmussen Good thing nobody asked nor implied you.
This guy Asmussen needs to spell his name right. Assmussen, lol. It's so hard to believe people this stupid actually walk the earth. In dinosaur days he would have been some animals dinner. I don't know what's sadder, that a guy like that probably votes or that the shallow gene pool that spawned him will more than likely be reproduced three or four times over!
FerraraM98 Perfect likes
911 likes
Thomas Asmussen people actually fell for this lmao
*”Why would they kill 3000 of their own infidels?”*
This was *the* line for me
Lmao
I knew I wasn’t the only one 🤣😂😂😂
Genius!😆
for opium habibi and to create fear
"Talking to you is like talking to a goat" I swear he's way too right
Thought I was the only one who caught that line
i thought it said girl and im kinda sad now
@@1c0nic_player it's the same thing anyway
@@humand0969 for them,yes
lol I still remembered this line by heart 15 years later 😂
The actor playing the Al Qaeda is just amazing.
"If you spent months planning something reallly special"
"Why is Osama bin Laden safe in .... somewhere"
"Me and Bush, we go out, we hang"
😂😂
Over 400 likes and not one comment? Not buying that at all. Seriously. Over 400 likes and not one comment? Even the anti-conspiracy theorists must be having internal dialog in their tell-a-vision addled, fluoridated minds. But they can never say anything because it's unpopular to disbelieve the official narrative. Anti-conspiracy theorists are some of the most dangerous people. They ALWAYS believe the government/corporate narrative. Deep down they are all Liberals. The only way Liberal ideology wins is with massive censorship, intimidation, violence and government expansion. Their ideas cannot win in a free market. Give them a polygraph about their own ideologies and most of them will fail.
It's Miles Grose.
"Why would they kill 3000 of their own infidels?"
"Talking to you is like talking to a goat!"
Den of jackals
He goes hey bring on the forgeries
"osama bin laden is safe in... somewhere" lmao he caught himself
The best part😂😂😂
LMAO
Propably in Aladeen's guest house
@@tomaszzalewski4541 You can't go to the bathroom after he used it.
@@tomaszzalewski4541 He was in Pakistan under the protection of the government.
It's the Onion so it's fake...
But it's April fools, so it's real.
Just like how two negatives equal a positive. Genius.
hm
This video was recommended to me on April first 2020
*APRIL'S FOOLS*
Mechagodzilla128 I mean a negative multuplied by a negative makes a positive 🤔
Hahaha it’s April fools, not opposite day
Poking fun at both extremists and conspiracy theorists in one skit. TheOnion and their wonderful skits are pure form of art.
And the American government.
He doesn't seem that extreme to me compared to the other guy.
your pfp is hot
@@Demiglitch Well he is a terrorist.
Wooosh. The skit went flying ovee yer head dinit?
1:02 "How would you feel if you spent 2 months in the mountain caves sleeping on rocks planning on something really special only for someone else to take credit." I felt that in my soul 😂😂
Israel
Did
9️⃣1️⃣1️⃣
"Why is Osama Bin Laden safe in...in somewhere"
Maybe the best delivered line in acting history
Ikr!!
Nearly sounded like safe in Saudi quickly changed to somewhere 😂
Such retards in the comments section, you fucks believe everything they put in front of you. Whilst you never even seen actual footage of Osoma getting killed, you never seen how those planes got hijacked, it’s bullshit, wake your asses up, maybe find some ACTUAL proof that’s not found on some website and then state your brainless statements in the comments section
>best delivered line in acting history
I think that distinction belongs to the trajectory of United Airlines flight 175
safe in "Pakistan"😂
Do you think this is how the Egyptians feel when people say aliens built the pyramids
Edit: it appears I’ve accidentally created a war zone between Arab nationalists, African nationalists, Egyptian nationalists, and conspiracy theorists
Now its
Jews
Africans
Syrians
Indians
built the pyramids and the Egyptians were just playing in the Nile
(somehow and IDK why, some people didn't understand that it was a sarcasm and thought that I was really saying Indians built the pyramid, I mean for the Love of God what is wrong with you.)
Remision Arcidash of course of course
Remision Arcidash the fact that you liked your own comment makes you 10 times more believable
@@remisionarcidash8671 lol the Indians though
@@remisionarcidash8671 the egytians were africans tho. they also didnt use any slaves to build the pyramids as that would be too hard to do
The funniest part about this in retrospect is that Modern Day Debate or some other big online debate show could actually host a debate between an Al Qaeda member and a 9/11 truther on this exact topic and that honestly wouldn't be that out of place.
Truly
Not really. We could easily compare the comments from past time to current time and measure the difference. Anti conspiracy theorists are r333tards. All of them. Total losers
To be fair, Taliban is now the official government in Afghanistan and has de facto control over its territory, so this is going to happen soon. They've already appointed ambassadors to a few Asian countries' embassies, ousting the previous dudes.
@@cleopatrasrevengeoh man remember when former taliban soldiers started complaining on twitter about getting stuck doing office work so they could actually start running things? it truly felt like something the onion would come up with but it was real life
Jubilee would definitely do it if they could.
The latest Moscow attack is basically this: An increasingly frustrated ISIS having to repeatedly insist that it was them who did it LMAO
Yeah, they even uploaded bodycam footage - but Russia will probably claims it's AI-generated...
@@highdefinist9697well that’s fucked up. And if you’re wondering what I’m referring to the answer is yes
@@judet2992wdym what you're referring to, this wasn't exactly a cryptic conversation
@@destituteanddecadent9106 it was a joke
@@judet2992 I guess I don't get the joke. What were you referring to?
HOW WOULD YOU LIKE IT IF YOU SPEND 2 MONTH UP IN A MOUNTAIN CAVE, SLEEPING ON *ROCKS* , PLANNING SOMETHING REALLY SPECIAL, THEN SOMEONE COMES AND TAKES CREDIT
“Planning something really special” as though the dude was working up to a marriage proposal or something lmao
@@nikolaaa5988 that’s what killed me
Haha yea that's what it takes to penetrate the multi million dollar US defense system 😂
I had to rewind that line twice. His delivery really caught me off guard.
@@salahelhaddad4872 billion
"We flew an enormous airplane into a building. Okay, I think it is obvious what caused the building to crumble." XD
The book author needs to respond that the planes were holograms.
Dee Dee Love mmhmm
What plane flew into wtc7
@GazB85 just trying to help out here. The phrase is "I would have never guessed" not "I'd never of guessed". Or "I would've never guessed".
David Musial it doesnt have to. All the top 15% has to do is crush ONE single floor. Once that happens, the resulting momentum will crush the next floor, which adds even more momentum and weight to the top. Floor after floor after floor, exactly what we see on 9/11.
"Me and Bush we go out, we hang, he goes bring home the forgery..." I like how even he's fed up with the guy at that point.
Talking to you is like talking to a goat!
The concept of Al-Quada getting butthurt because they're not getting credit kills me.
“Go to the top of the Washington monument and you will see how well al qaeda is at planning things” LOL
Legend has it - they are still waiting.!!
Lol your comment has excatly 911 likes
"Planning things" aka fast dial George Bush to take them out
October 12th is my birthday
Sababugs112 mine too brother!
"I can assure You: We did NOT used thermite bombs! I did the research myself - it would not have worked...".
This is brilliant!
H
Concrete, 100% not lying totally
@@123Mathzak I love how it implies that Al-Qaeda was going to use thermite bombs but their organizer did the research and found it wouldn't work.
@@MistahFox Yeah their organizer def wouldn’t be paid under the table or anything
“It's like talking to a goat”
It's so annoying when somebody else tries to take the credit for your work.
If I am not mistaken, wasn't a serial killer caught for exactly that reason?
I literally showed this to my coworkers and they totally believed this. They ate the onion.
'take your family with you, October 12, 2009, lets say 3:04 pm' - that cracked me
Search . ' Christopher Bollyn Solving 9 11 Audio Book . '
10/12 Hm. Wonder what that could be?
@@GDPepiman lol
10/12? I’m starting to see a trend and branding here
💀
"Talking to you is like talking to a goat."
*Girl
@@dominicgunderson same thing
@Mialisus a fellow intellectual I see
*Goat Girl
@@dominicgunderson Goat.
Anyone watching after ISIS is desperately trying to prove that it was them who committed the Crocus City Hal shooting?
Actually I'm here after seeing a clip of Trump claiming Obama and Hillary Clinton founded Isis.
insane how uneducated americans are. conspiracy theorist country has gone off the deep end
Me. This is basically ISIS right now lmao.
William Gerard is Russia trying to Ukraine for an islamic terror attack.
And the Al Kaida guy is ISIS openly and proudly admitting that they did it and release more and more bodycam footage to prove it. And western intelligence agencies also confirm that ISIS did it and have even warned Russia 2 weeks in advance of an imminent islamic terror attack.
ISIS attacking Russia and before that Iran. Is that ISIS or a CIA black ops unit???
@@Mr.Stizblee I love how later Fox News did an interview with him and asked him if he meant Obama and Clinton simply created the environment that eventually gave birth to ISIS, and he said no, they quite literally founded ISIS xD
This stuff still hits perfectly 14 years later. Some of it is strangely poignant and relevant, which just shows that things never change
And what it relevant from here?
Anti conspiracy theorists NEVER reply. They are total freaking LOSERS!@@aaronsound
"Why is Osama bin Laden safe in... somewhere?"
😂
@@DynamicGracer 5 years later you comment. Lol and the video is from 2008 on top on all that I just happen to watch and see your comment a few hours after you posted it. Feels weird. I use to watch the onion years ago and watching the newest Rogan podcast with Penn they mentioned the onion and it caused me to look them up to see if they still make videos. And to my surprise they still do!
Anyways it's strange how alot of the comments seem either very recent or very old.
@@the_original_Bilb_Ono they don't
They sold themselves to a different company haha
And I commented just to alert you just in case you didn't know you had 3.8k likes
Bilb Ono i am still sad he died
They make things now, a podcast called the topical. It's actually not bad
The whole “why is his approval rating in el-hammam” joke is so underrated. El Hammam means “The Bathhouse” but also means “The Toilet” in Arabic. He’s saying George Bush’s ratings are in the shitter.
Oh, I wondered about that. Thanks for explaining!
Nice. Thanks
Kinda concerning that they use the same word for those..
@@Marqan We do the same in English. "Excuse me, where is the bathroom?"
I'm a native Arabic speaker and I didn't even catch that because of how badly mispronounced it was 😂
Russia and tankies blaming Ukraine after the Terrorist attack right now lol
tf is a tankie
@@longbottomleafresearch5296 pretty authoritarian who tries to hide own fascistic Eastern imperialism by using socialistic talking points.
We are living in the *_uhh..._* timeline.
This is just a fuckin masterpiece
that stutter: "Osama Bin Laden is safe in - - somewhere"
NOT ANYMORE
@@patrickshaw411 that’s what they want you to think
It’s actually why is osama bin laden safe in err somewhere, and ur right it is a masterpiece, and hilarious af.
This is the kind of nuanced, balanced discussion we need in our culture again.
Search . ' Solving 9-11 By Christopher Bollyn . '
unholy number of likes
@@Idontwannashutup not any more muhahaha
'We certainly have common ground there'🤣🤣
@@rezakarampour6286 or any of david ray griffins books on 9/11!!
Came here after Putin claimed it was the Ukrainians behind the Moscow terrorist attack
Same.
Russia is William Gerard blaming Ukraine for an islamic terror attack, without any evidence.
The Al Kaida guy is ISIS openly (and proudly) admitting that they did it and release more and more bodycam footage to prove it.
Western intelligence agencies also confirm that ISIS did it.
Russia is a real life "The Onion" sketch lol. The stupidity and brazen lies of the russian government truly are something else
"talking to you is like talking to a goat"
Man, these Onion actors are a class by themself. Hollywood can't hold a candle to these guys.
Harki Rehal the actor of Omar Al-Farouq is my favourite out of everyone. He nails it so well and never cracks character
They cant even speak or act and they try and imitate people from middle east by gettin a man to wear a scarf and yeh thats it they know people will believe anything they see or hear. Shame on the media for resorting to these tactics finally people can see through it.
@@umarzahir3582 It's satire dude, it's not meant to look real. They're amazing actors, but nobody's perfect.
@@umarzahir3582 ....this video is from the onion( a satirical site), the fuck your on about.
@@umarzahir3582 Hey dumbass. How's it like to live as a dumbass? Have you been this way your whole life?
As a Muslim, I'm afraid if I laugh at this the FBI will come kick down my door.
Same brother. Assalamualaikum
@@domizzy1348 ayyyy 😎
muslim here
Same 😂😂😂
Don't worry, they proved on that day that they'd not be kicking your door down even if you really *were* up to something, so you're safe.
They would vacate the entire property out of fear that someone or something would explode
ISIS after putin blames Ukraine again 😂
The Onion should do a satire of the fact that RUclips put a Context notice on top of this video.
The “2 months in mountain caves” line is so good, does anyone else remember when the newspapers thought that we couldn’t find Bin Laden because he somehow hollowed out a cave and all the terrorists were hiding in it? There was a whole diagram about how it would work and what it looked like, and then it turned out that he was just in a fuckin house
Yeah Pakistan really did a good job helping him....
Smart move..Not so much trusting his Doctor... Who we do hear so much on... 🤔😉
Ah yes, the Tora Bora complex. That DoD diagram is hilarious
The crazy part is that was a fictional diagram from times of London and Rumsfeld went on "meet the press" and passed it off as real saying "not just one there are MANY of those"
edit: I found the video lol:
ruclips.net/video/FGhGHxw0mSo/видео.html
@@alans5799 Search . ' Solving 9-11 By Christopher Bollyn . '
to be fair if i did 9/11 i'd be offended if i didn't get credit as well
The only way you wouldn't be offended is if part of the plan was to pin the whole thing on someone else
One time I let a guy stay with me to help him out, but he screwed me over and dipped out the last month without paying the rent. I found out where he was staying and went over to his house and smashed all the windows on his truck which cost a lot more money than that last month's rent. I checked Facebook and he blamed it on someone else. Apparently he was a huge douche to a lot of people and I wasn't the most recent person he ripped off. I was relieved to not have to worry about facing retaliation or legal issues but part of me still wanted him to know I did it.
Which adds even more humor to the situation, the white guy is trying to frame it as "just asking questions" and "keeping an open mind" but if you were the terrorist responsible you know that's not what he's doing.
You on a list now lol
@@laythadrian5705 this can be used against you in court
ISIS-K is feeling this right now as Russia tries to heap blame for the Crocus City Concert Hall massacre on Ukraine. "HEY! WE DID THAT!"
'and why is osama bin laden safe in... somewhere' I'm DEAD
man i won't find anybody explaining the joke in the comments please help me out
@@jesuisboogie7945the spokesman almost loses his temper and lets slip where bin laden is (this skit was made befote he was killed by the US marines)
@@sergiorubens8475 ho ok i thought it wasn't just that thx
The Al Queada guy is such a good actor, he plays it so well
@@mangonel hey you're a good infidel, don't come to the Empire State building tomorrow
@@mangonel He'll show you how great they are at organizing things.
Yes
@David Zarqui chill Dave
Yeah, he’s a goat!
This actually sort of happened in real life. Al Qaeda got angry with Ahmadinejad for espousing 9/11 conspiracy theories and claimed he just hated Sunnis and didn't want to give them credit.
Onion becomes news :D
CIA and Mossad shill got mad you mean.
@@neurofiedyamato8763 As is the tradition
the reason i like ahmadinejad is because he makes it easier to know what is true and what isnt, for example if you see ahmadinejad saying literally anything you can add that to the list of things that arent true when if he didnt say it u maybe wouldnt know its lie for sure
@@fordmustnagisbestcarath5046 what's the guy up to nowadays anyway
"I work for Bush, me and Bush, we go out, we hang, he goes 'ayy, bring on the forgery" LMAO
This is way too good, thank you onion 🙏🏽
"Bush's administration they're a den of jackals, we certainly have common ground there" holy shit the jokes the onion puts in these videos come at us so fast its easy to miss them, but theyre all gold
the den of jackals quote comes from Jeremiah 9:11 as well 😂😂
That's not even a joke, that's just reality. The real al quaeda would have no problem with this portrayal I am sure. That's the point, that this is reality and the fact that it's so stupid is why reality in this case is onion worthy. The ONLY thing stopping this interview from happening in real life is al quaeda staying hidden.
Well now this makes more sense than denim jackals, which is what I heard originally...
@@salmonnnnman you’re not alone, I heard that too and thought it was a reference to them wearing jeans on the ranch 😂 very specific
Bush is still alive cries
Mah women mah children in Afghanistan n Iraq why did you stop the war.
2:18 "Let Mr. Faruqq of Al Queda speak!" underrated line
It’s spelled Pharouque lmao
Billy Horseshoe Pause at 0:27
@kr tu why is it underrated?
@@dogsdreamtoo8427 because its hilarious in a subtle way and that makes it better.
Such a good moderator! You gotta let your guests speak!
Get him to moderate the next presidential debates in 2024
I*is trying to convince Russia today...
All of these Onion skits are truly funny. I can't imagine they couldn't bring this back and monetize the hell out of it.
"Most of the mainstream media are too afraid to have me on. Thank you" 🤣🤣🤣
If this skit would've been made today, he would've said: lamestream media* There!
@Anthony Salerno anyone who isnt a neocon and neolib hates the msm
@@hitlerjusthitlerliterallyh2700 not that different from alternative media on RUclips. Look at crowder and other loonies, conning their audience, being caught red handed and still their audience in denial can’t put 2 and 2 together, coming back for more. It’s darn right sad how extremeified and blindfolded the US population has gotten over the last 10 years. Other major player countries aren’t doing any better either. This kettle is about to come to a boil, it’s easy to rile up people, it takes effort for everyone to calm down.
@@nosferatu5 Crowder is a neocon, dont use that dumbass to slander all right wingers
@@hitlerjusthitlerliterallyh2700
For very different reasons, right winger hate the MSM cause they wont air conspiracy theories, its no the same as anti-war protesters that hate them cause they cheer for foreingh interventions, or other kinds of people with legitimate grivances
"planning something really special" lol. that line gets me every time we'll done ONN!
we will done
😅
He said that like he was planning a surprise birthday birthday LMFAOOOOOOO
Take the whole family lol
@@ijemand56727 years later 🤣🤣🤣
Sometimes I go back and read classic Onion articles/watch videos like this and can't believe how good their stuff was
This is the kind of good satire that comes back. I see people talking about several attacks, but let’s not forget the joke at its core; conspiracies are nuts.
Youre just an airhead.
2.3 trillion dollars september 10th
not really a conspiracy, especially if somehow 2.3 trillion dollars disappear from the pentagon, the CIA once planned to harm its own citizens to justify an invasion of Cuba after the Bay of Pigs failed
Still a conspiracy theory by definition guys
Dumb as a rock
It's been 7 years and this still is just as funny now.
10 years now
@Sinjin Smyth oh yeah because its not like the point was to make fun of the discussion. No it was to laugh at each individual casulaty
@Sinjin Smyth people die everyday get over it
10 years in a few days and it's still funny
@Watch Man I guess I'm retarded lol, I just added the 3 years ago to the 7 years in the comment without checking the actual date.
“me and bush, we go out, we hang” was delivered perfectly omg
WTF is your username
@@agent0-1-02 bootyful
I love your username.
😂
"Why would they kill 3,000 of their own infidels?"
"Why would they kill 3000 of their own infidels" lololol 😂
Lol
Cos of their extremist religion 😂
I don't get it. What is infidel and who are there own
@@AzzWalk Infidel = one who is unfaithful, refers to non muslims
@@oliverseguin7812 but what's the joke?
“Why would they kill 3000 of their own infidels?” Incredible.
Idiots
Infidels
To add more to the joke. The 9/11 conspirator would say because of corporate greed or something
@@kejiri3593 but thats true. Usa killed over 400k of their own people during the corona crisis just for that
USA killed more than that of their soldiers in Iraq searching for non existent WMD.
"Me and Bush we go out, we hang he goes 'hey bring along the forgery'" While talking over each other lmaoooo
“Why is his approval rating in al-hamam” LOL as an Arab (and Muslim) I LOVED THAT haha. Although al-hamam is generally used as “bathroom” and not specifically “toilet”.
The Onion had some balls to post something like this only 7 years later...
More like 6.5 lol
I heard the Onion made 9/11 jokes litterally right after 9/11!!
This wasn’t making a joke about 9/11. It’s aimed at the nut job conspiracy theorists who think it was an inside job. That’s an important distinction.
The Onion wrote a written article about the hijackers 2 weeks after the event, interviewing them asking why they were in hell and not heaven.
Better then than now
Omar Al-Farouq has to be my favorite recurring Onion character.
Brug
@@wayne7357 bruh*
He was also a real person and a real member of Al Qaeda
@@NJ-wb1cz yeah he usually hung out with the Bush family too
A Saudi VIP
Oh this never gets old!
"We flew an enormous plane into a building, I think it is obvious what caused the building to crumble"
Yeah...thats pretty much it.
It really is huh.
BUT THE STEEL BEAMS
Very fortunate "terrorist" attack for silverstein
Yeah but no. The buildings should not have fallen like they did. It looks a lot like a controlled demolition with explosives and that is probably what happened
@@christophermalthe1818 -- no they don't look like controlled demolitions at all. In controlled demolition the collapse begins at the base, in both towers it initiated at the impacted zones. There were no sounds of perimeter or core columns being blown out. Parts of the buildings, such as a large piece of the core of the North tower even remained intact for a brief period after the collapse. Its not consistent at all with controlled demolition but its absolutely consistent with catastrophic failure of the structure at the impacted floors.
I like to think that Onion news is a news site from a parallel universe that somehow made it into ours.
original comment
I think they are getting TLC back.
That's canon
ooooh, like it! like it a lot! thumbs up!
The Rick and Morty Interdimensional Cable
Russia Today need to interview the ISIS Spockesman soon. Have him present the plane ticket and Moscow map.
I don't know why RUclips is recommending old Onion videos to me, but I appreciate it.
"Talking to you is like talking to a goat"
Jimmy Russels and I'm sure he knows
+Jimmy Russels Lolz, love that line!!
Jimmy Russels Oct.12 2009 nothing happened. There's proof that at least the Bush Administration allowed 911 to happen.
911ambulancegirl me and Bush we go out we hang that was funny. Bin Laden isn't safe and is a coward didn't even go out the way he tells his followers to go out.
@@00tonytone What are you on about?
LMFAO. "Aw here we go" that was funniest thing ever.
You would like Raj fahneen on the phil hendrie show. I think he was an inspiration for this bit
Awee shee hewe go ‘gain
Ahhh shiiii, here we go again.
Laughed my ass off here from Sweden
The dude is a fantastic actor
"I have the voucher for the flight lessons" 💀
The acting in this is top notch. Oscar worthy, I'm not even kidding. 😂
The writing is amazing but the real miracle are those two anonymous actors perfectly reproducing this style of debate, keeping to the script and making it look like they are speaking from the top of their heads. Bravo.
Omar Al Faruq's actor is killing it!
When you see actors interrumpting or talking over eachother, it usually means it was partly improvised, not exactly reading of a script word for word
Onion actors are next level.
@@shooby9496
I think it’s more so the direction given to them by the Onion. Audiences often easily overlook the fact that good direction to the actors by directing staff creates good acting.
The reason the Onion has consistently good acting in their videos is because they gave great direction to their actors to truly let them shine in their performances.
People compare this to Hollywood, which they should, because these decade old Onion clips are beating them at their own game. Hollywood has an abundance of talented actors, and a shortage of talented directors who can give adequate directions to the actors in their roles.
The end result is horrid acting that is mostly the fault of shoddy direction. Yet, audiences blame the actors because all they see is what’s on screen, the actors giving a terrible performance. So the actors shoulder the blame and are left with tarnished careers, while the directors responsible get away scot free to ruin more movies.
TLDR: The acting industry has a problem, that problem is the directing industry. The Onion has consistently great acting because the directors on staff are good at their jobs.
@@videodaniel8945my man, that is false.
Speaking of troubling events and unsolved mysteries from 2001, did we ever figure out who let the dogs out?
If I remember there was money from SA
Dogtor Who
WHO LET THE DOGS OUT?!
Some reports indicated they came from Mexico near the Baja region but those were erroneous. Turns out they were really from London. Three angry young men from the Southern Baha region had in fact sought the perpetrators of the releasing of said dogs but to no avail. A vigil will be held in 2021 for the twenty year anniversary of the dogs being let out.
Top 10 mysteries that scientist can't explain .
This is the best onion video.
That slight pause when he asked," Why is Osama safe in ... somewhere" was genius
When a joke become true. Can't believe AQ actually had to debunk conspiracy theories in 2021 because they were mad at loosing credit of the attack....
When did that happen?
@@wizard7314 Not sure about what he's talking about, but there is a 2011 ABCnews article that mentions Al Qaeda was angry at an Iranian official for believing the conspiracy.
Haha the conspiracy is in fact believing your government
You mean "for believing the theories" because the conspiracy isn't real
@@ijemand5672 Watch it on RUclips . ' The Military Knows Israel Did 911 . '
“ i work for bush…. me and bush we go out we hang” i’m dead
He says "bring on the forgeries"
@@manfromnantucket9544 🤣🤣
“I can assure you they are a den of jackels” is gold.
What a great The Onion video!
They are all good, but the actor who plays the al qaeda guy is absolutely brilliant. He should get an oscar for this 😂
hired fake al Qaeda, they think we stupid
@ Really? This is a satirical channel. 😆
@@anonb4632 I withdraw... hahahhaha
@ Bruhhhhh you thought this was real??
He reminds me of Muslim Ben Carson
Still the funniest Onion video of all time
+Lllobster cation Some come close.
+Adam A
It's right up there, but the "Do You Remember Life Before the Segway" video might be funnier. And the congressman reading into the congressional record his description of how he killed a hobo is pretty damned good, too- "hobo" is just an inherently funny word.
+Adam A symbolic is an awesome album
Why is Osama bin laden safe in somewhere lol
"China celebrates status as world's #1 polluter" is pretty funny too. So is the one about the "Attractive Girls Union."
Ive never been a big fan of the onion mainly because its just not my brand of humor usually. But oh my gosh this is absolutely hilarious. By far my favorite thing from them.
The onion always hits best 7+ years after the release date of the video
This might very well be my favourite Onion video
That Muslim guy is a damn good actor..
+Jaygo Tee Probably some Puerto Rican guy lol
EarthAngel_A.i. hes probably Mexican
He looks like don omar
MAGICIAN Yes, he is. That’s The Onion’s entire thing.
You don't know he's Muslim
"why is Osama Bin Laden safe in...s-somewhere?"
Because he is gay.
@@prosperousestablishment1808 Every Arab is.
@@prosperousestablishment1808 fuck off
IM SO GLAD I GOT STONED BEFORE I WATCHED THIS. IM LOSING MY SHIT!
Such a great interview.
When the officer tells me to snitch or go to prison: 1:55
😂
Tekashi 6ix9ine 😂
@@upmayo100 snitchnine
😝😆😅😂😂
1:47
"just wait there"
Dude I fucking love this channel holy shit
I can’t wait to scroll down to these comments and find every line of the video in quotes followed by the commenter saying it’s gold
When the Al Qaeda guy is the sane man.
Just making sure you know this is satire...You do know, right?
Reck Yourself
Chrissakes, Onion and clickhole videos are full of comments like yours. Why wouldn’t he know it’s satire? It’s not hard to spot. It’s not even like he confused you because he was playing along with it or anything, just made a little comment
@@laylaruan You'd be surprised.
Uh huh
im too stupid to process my process
"Cheese originally purchased as ingredient becomes entire meal"
Me
@@cyborgboomer1701 you
Ourselves
@ExDeeXD Music *O U R* CHEESE
Thought that said Chinese and not cheese.
I wish this channel came back to this incredible glory… they would have 100x views now
"I have flight school records, etc."
Onion offering to present more evidence than the Commission did.
yup!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This is peak peak satire. And the 'Oh here we go..' 😂😂😂
Yes, that part was too perfect!
'Oh here we go..' what?
You will NEVER reply.
This is incredible. 2020 needs more of this type of satire and humor.
humour is everywhere in 2020. a 0.018% global death rate is named a pandemic since it was 0.00001%, and a global scale, fascist economic collapse is needed to produce more deaths, because otherwise the measures would bring no change to deaths. there are millions other jokes out there, but remember, don't go out without your mask. you and your grandpa may live longer than life expectancy if you act THAT irresponsibly.
Unfortunately now days is all politically correct
Its hard to make fun of the braindead, they provide all the comedy about them themselves.
See constantinos schinas comment for proof.
@@constantinosschinas4503
and someone doesnt know how death rates work.
@@constantinosschinas4503you must be fun at parties