i think we buy things that represent who want to be, but in reality it’s just not us. i would love to be someone w lots of odd trinkets n quirky decorations in my room… but honestly i like empty counters n walls bcoz it gives me peace
I often put items in my on-line shopping cart then come back a week later and usually delete it. Totally agree with your delay, distract, and defame concept. Thank you for these videos!
Yes, and I lay it all in excruciating detail to myself - "you're going to have make the decision to return it, then you're going to have to repackage the item, then you're going to have to take it ALL THE WAY back to the store, then you're going to have to monitor your credit card account to make sure you get the credit and this can take 5-7 days to show up, so you're going to have to keep checking your account for a week. Are you sure you want to get this?"
I appreciate these videos. I found for me, putting a wait period on things only increases my desire for an item. I kind of “lust” after it. It’s basically the same mentality as restricting certain foods. I become fixated and then “binge” buy on the day the waiting period ends. Obviously that’s something I need to reflect on and unpack but I find that having a shopping window and set budget relaxes my brain a bit, decreases the desire. It also helps eliminate a lot of the underlying negative feels I have when shopping. I find that I also have to consider how choices I make for other areas of my life gives me decision fatigue. If I am needing to stay highly organized and well planned for work, it makes it difficult to put that energy elsewhere. Additionally I eat a plant based diet. While I don’t personally find it restrictive for myself and really enjoy it, trying to eat out at a restaurant or at social gatherings at friends homes requires a lot of forethought and planning because I don’t want others to feel impacted by my eating choices. So I have the responsibility to myself to get my nutrition needs meet with out a negative social impact.
I’m 62 and have had a lot of shopping experience, for my children and myself. I shop for basics and staples all the time. In the last 10-15 years finding simple well made clothes that aren’t too…something is like finding a needle in a haystack. At one time, about twice a year, I’d do a shopping trip for basics and some extras and that would be it. They weren’t perfect but they were good pieces. I know because I have clothes from yesterday year that are wonderful. After having conversations with other people-young and old I have found they are experiencing the same thing. I hate shopping, but I also hate going out in faded worn clothing.
*5 things to quit for all people:* *1. Caring about what others think* *2. Not believing in yourself* *3. Not prioritizing your health* *4. Wasting your precious time* *5. Chasing meaningless relationships*
Thrift store shopping has been an issue for me for YEARS ~ as a teen it was kind of a cool underground thing in the 80's, but I've never outgrown it. It is a distraction, it's sort of social, there is even a sense of community to it - from city to small town. The dopamine rush of a "GREAT deal" or "Total score" (eg: a pair NEW of AS98s for 40 dollars!) This is a totally different sort of shopping that almost blurs into gambling. We can't 'delay' because there is only ONE item, and it's random. Still, I KNOW I do not 'need' pretty much ANYTHING I score, other than fitness, cycling or swim gear :(
You should never deprive yourself of spending on something you need or like. Instead of no spending say I am going to spend less! People who are on a diet will eat more later. Choose to buy good food , intermittent fasting and treat yourself once in awhile is a reward for hard working everyday.
Love this! Especially defaming what you want to buy. I so often over-idealize something I want to buy and then when I get it, I find something wrong with it. Fantastic advice! Can’t wait for part 2!! 💚💚💚
I have been using the DDD method and they do work BUT in addition, I think of the environmental impact. I have been making a conscious move away from fast fashion and fast anything. If it’s not an environmentally sound item, I consider how often I would use it to justify the purchase. The hardest things are decorative items - when you have too much it’s clutter. Or it doesn’t go with your home. So I consider that too.
I really liked the defame portion of your video. I plan to use this the next time I am tempted to make a purchase I don't really need. Thanks for the tip.
I stopped online shopping for clothes, shoes, bags, jewelry as it NEVER is the way I imagined: wrong fit, wrong colour, wrong texture, etc...I make lists of what to buy, many lists and then after a while I compare the lists to see what remain constant and then go buy it!!!( I am now able to wait up to 2/3 months before shopping for my item)
Yes, DELAY 👍🏻 Even while shopping at Wallymart I will reconsider near the end of my shopping and go put some things back on the shelf - it’s one way to add more steps to my Step-Garmin.
I am watching this video as I add items to my IKEA cart. To say it's ironic is an understatement. EDIT: I reduced my cart by a further $230 after watching the video and now the frivolous stuff (toys for Christmas and stationery storage) is now $107 worth. The rest are necessities. The defame method is excellent!
I recently decided to cut down impulsive shopping. Dedicated Wednesday and Saturday when any money will be spent be it groceries, gas for car or anything else. Its really helps cut down wasteful spending. Keeping my budget in tight control. Helping me learn to cook own my own food than spending money for lunch. Not to mention the time saved making trips to shops.
Good tips often after 24 hours I forget… other tips shop my closet try new outfits with old clothes inspiring by the best in it Alyssa Beltempo looks their Chanel you will find inspiration … thank’s for this video love it!
I like your approach. I'm doing very well except when I give myself a "no online shopping" restriction that always backfires sooo badly😂😂😂. And restrictions feel tight and forced and trying to control and yeah it's not working😂.
I use delay and distract, I need to defame! I idealize all my potential purchases. Thanks for sharing these tips, they are very good. I like your direct approach. Thank you.
I purged my closet and the number of things that still has it tag…. I just shop to good and return to relieve the guilt of it all😢 I decimately find I buy things to tight, too big, synthetic fabric, it’s usually expensive… a wild goofy pattern or blue a color that doesn’t match my skin.. in the moment they seem perfect but I get them home and if I don’t forget them stashed away I have to return them. I recently bought food I don’t eat (fruits) and carbs, I’m too embraced to return it $50. 😢I’m job hunting…and I guess it’s a bit stressful not to get call backs
I had a pair of earphones in my Amazon cart for two days and left them alone. They had great reviews, and I was thinking of getting them. Just before I ordered, I looked at them closely and realized that they say "do not wear with glasses." If I hadn't let them sit for a few days, I would have been very disappointed and wasted money because my prescription is so bad, I can't get contacts.
Hey, you said "you're not perfect at minimalism." Perfectionism is a real sticky place in my head. I don't want you or your followers to shoot for Perfectionism, because none of us are perfect. We can feel like a huge failure after just a small mistake. I have a huge problem with feeling disappointment in myself when I can't perfect something. Got any advice on this part of a minimalist journey?
The one I use is defame. The delay one is not great for me because I live ina remote place and do mu shopping when I’m in town, so I’m not going ton wait to go back to the store that is 4hrs from my house (I’m not big in online shopping). But if I’d live in a big city I would do that!
I understand this. I’m not that isolated but when I go somewhere far from my home and I fall in love with something i know I won’t find near me I just buy it.
This was a wonderful video.I wish that I had watched it five days ago before I bought my $249 cordless vaccuum. My husband tried to talk me into getting a vaccuum with a bag, but I was stubborn.Now, every time I vaccuum, I get asthma, I have to empty the very small canister and rinse it(and get more asthma), and my husband accidentally threw away one of the turbo tools to vacuum upholstery with that was in the box that my dog jumped over to avoid tripping down the outside stairs that he threw it on and tore her alc and miniscus, which is going to be a 5 thousand dollar surgery.That was one expensive vaccum, and do I EVER regret purchasing it.
i think we buy things that represent who want to be, but in reality it’s just not us. i would love to be someone w lots of odd trinkets n quirky decorations in my room… but honestly i like empty counters n walls bcoz it gives me peace
I often put items in my on-line shopping cart then come back a week later and usually delete it. Totally agree with your delay, distract, and defame concept. Thank you for these videos!
Great strategy! Thanks for sharing!
I do the SAME THING!
Same same!
A strategy I use is thinking about the time/effort it would take to return an item I’m not 100% sure of.
Yes, and I lay it all in excruciating detail to myself - "you're going to have make the decision to return it, then you're going to have to repackage the item, then you're going to have to take it ALL THE WAY back to the store, then you're going to have to monitor your credit card account to make sure you get the credit and this can take 5-7 days to show up, so you're going to have to keep checking your account for a week. Are you sure you want to get this?"
@@pbergstr1 I will make an effort to remind myself because I spend way too much time on my returns. Thank you!
I appreciate these videos. I found for me, putting a wait period on things only increases my desire for an item. I kind of “lust” after it. It’s basically the same mentality as restricting certain foods. I become fixated and then “binge” buy on the day the waiting period ends. Obviously that’s something I need to reflect on and unpack but I find that having a shopping window and set budget relaxes my brain a bit, decreases the desire. It also helps eliminate a lot of the underlying negative feels I have when shopping. I find that I also have to consider how choices I make for other areas of my life gives me decision fatigue. If I am needing to stay highly organized and well planned for work, it makes it difficult to put that energy elsewhere. Additionally I eat a plant based diet. While I don’t personally find it restrictive for myself and really enjoy it, trying to eat out at a restaurant or at social gatherings at friends homes requires a lot of forethought and planning because I don’t want others to feel impacted by my eating choices. So I have the responsibility to myself to get my nutrition needs meet with out a negative social impact.
I’m 62 and have had a lot of shopping experience, for my children and myself. I shop for basics and staples all the time. In the last 10-15 years finding simple well made clothes that aren’t too…something is like finding a needle in a haystack. At one time, about twice a year, I’d do a shopping trip for basics and some extras and that would be it. They weren’t perfect but they were good pieces. I know because I have clothes from yesterday year that are wonderful. After having conversations with other people-young and old I have found they are experiencing the same thing. I hate shopping, but I also hate going out in faded worn clothing.
*5 things to quit for all people:*
*1. Caring about what others think*
*2. Not believing in yourself*
*3. Not prioritizing your health*
*4. Wasting your precious time*
*5. Chasing meaningless relationships*
Thrift store shopping has been an issue for me for YEARS ~ as a teen it was kind of a cool underground thing in the 80's, but I've never outgrown it. It is a distraction, it's sort of social, there is even a sense of community to it - from city to small town. The dopamine rush of a "GREAT deal" or "Total score" (eg: a pair NEW of AS98s for 40 dollars!) This is a totally different sort of shopping that almost blurs into gambling. We can't 'delay' because there is only ONE item, and it's random. Still, I KNOW I do not 'need' pretty much ANYTHING I score, other than fitness, cycling or swim gear :(
i had a bad relapse from no spend to excessively spending
You should never deprive yourself of spending on something you need or like. Instead of no spending say I am going to spend less! People who are on a diet will eat more later. Choose to buy good food , intermittent fasting and treat yourself once in awhile is a reward for hard working everyday.
Thank you. I have gotten very bad with this and seeing these tips gives me hope I can stop before financial catastrophe
“Reduce its power over you” wow
Love this! Especially defaming what you want to buy. I so often over-idealize something I want to buy and then when I get it, I find something wrong with it. Fantastic advice! Can’t wait for part 2!! 💚💚💚
De frame: Read the negative reviews of the product and think on that !
Great tip!
I have been using the DDD method and they do work BUT in addition, I think of the environmental impact. I have been making a conscious move away from fast fashion and fast anything. If it’s not an environmentally sound item, I consider how often I would use it to justify the purchase. The hardest things are decorative items - when you have too much it’s clutter. Or it doesn’t go with your home. So I consider that too.
I really liked the defame portion of your video. I plan to use this the next time I am tempted to make a purchase I don't really need. Thanks for the tip.
I stopped online shopping for clothes, shoes, bags, jewelry as it NEVER is the way I imagined: wrong fit, wrong colour, wrong texture, etc...I make lists of what to buy, many lists and then after a while I compare the lists to see what remain constant and then go buy it!!!( I am now able to wait up to 2/3 months before shopping for my item)
Yes, DELAY 👍🏻
Even while shopping at Wallymart I will reconsider near the end of my shopping and go put some things back on the shelf - it’s one way to add more steps to my Step-Garmin.
I am watching this video as I add items to my IKEA cart. To say it's ironic is an understatement.
EDIT: I reduced my cart by a further $230 after watching the video and now the frivolous stuff (toys for Christmas and stationery storage) is now $107 worth. The rest are necessities. The defame method is excellent!
Yay! Way to go! Love this comment :)
I recently decided to cut down impulsive shopping. Dedicated Wednesday and Saturday when any money will be spent be it groceries, gas for car or anything else. Its really helps cut down wasteful spending. Keeping my budget in tight control. Helping me learn to cook own my own food than spending money for lunch. Not to mention the time saved making trips to shops.
You are one smart young lady. Thanks for the wisdom.
Good tips often after 24 hours I forget… other tips shop my closet try new outfits with old clothes inspiring by the best in it Alyssa Beltempo looks their Chanel you will find inspiration … thank’s for this video love it!
The three D sounds very useful and I will certainly use it in the next time!
It's so hard this time of year because there are a million ads hitting you with holiday deals
I like your approach. I'm doing very well except when I give myself a "no online shopping" restriction that always backfires sooo badly😂😂😂. And restrictions feel tight and forced and trying to control and yeah it's not working😂.
Such great advice!!❤️❤️❤️
This is a really helpful video thankyou.
I use delay and distract, I need to defame! I idealize all my potential purchases. Thanks for sharing these tips, they are very good. I like your direct approach. Thank you.
Thank you so much. Perfect! Looking forward to next video.
These are great practical tips. Loved this video. Thank you for sharing!💗
I purged my closet and the number of things that still has it tag…. I just shop to good and return to relieve the guilt of it all😢 I decimately find I buy things to tight, too big, synthetic fabric, it’s usually expensive… a wild goofy pattern or blue a color that doesn’t match my skin.. in the moment they seem perfect but I get them home and if I don’t forget them stashed away I have to return them. I recently bought food I don’t eat (fruits) and carbs, I’m too embraced to return it $50. 😢I’m job hunting…and I guess it’s a bit stressful not to get call backs
I had a pair of earphones in my Amazon cart for two days and left them alone. They had great reviews, and I was thinking of getting them. Just before I ordered, I looked at them closely and realized that they say "do not wear with glasses." If I hadn't let them sit for a few days, I would have been very disappointed and wasted money because my prescription is so bad, I can't get contacts.
Awesome Video!!
Hey, you said "you're not perfect at
minimalism." Perfectionism is a real sticky place in my head. I don't want you or your followers to shoot for Perfectionism, because none of us are perfect. We can feel like a huge failure after just a small mistake. I have a huge problem with feeling disappointment in myself when I can't perfect something. Got any advice on this part of a minimalist journey?
The one I use is defame. The delay one is not great for me because I live ina remote place and do mu shopping when I’m in town, so I’m not going ton wait to go back to the store that is 4hrs from my house (I’m not big in online shopping). But if I’d live in a big city I would do that!
I understand this. I’m not that isolated but when I go somewhere far from my home and I fall in love with something i know I won’t find near me I just buy it.
I have seen people changing their hair color after each and Every 7 to 8 weeks. Purchasing services on and off is also one kind of implusive shopping.
My "defame" technique is to think about how I will need to dispose of the item. Will it end up in the landfill?
Such a good one!
I needed this video thank you
This was a wonderful video.I wish that I had watched it five days ago before I bought my $249 cordless vaccuum. My husband tried to talk me into getting a vaccuum with a bag, but I was stubborn.Now, every time I vaccuum, I get asthma, I have to empty the very small canister and rinse it(and get more asthma), and my husband accidentally threw away one of the turbo tools to vacuum upholstery with that was in the box that my dog jumped over to avoid tripping down the outside stairs that he threw it on and tore her alc and miniscus, which is going to be a 5 thousand dollar surgery.That was one expensive vaccum, and do I EVER regret purchasing it.
🖐🏼🙂