I spit out my drink when you said "Oh No! They're stupid..... I'm a smart person!" If I had a dollar for every moment I felt that way at church back in the day....😂😂😂
you're fucking dope and i hope you read this as aggressively as i'm typing it because i love you and you have made me laugh while im ugly crying about something my family has said to me
I have felt so lonely in this process and as I listened to this I suddenly don’t feel as lonely. I’ve experienced the same thoughts and emotions and it’s nice to know that I am not alone or going crazy. You were able to put into words those same emotions so well. Thank you.
I would never have encountered Carah on TikTok, so thanks to both of you. So many things I love about this, but one that I will be quoting (at about 2:47:30): "I don't care if it is more advantageous for me to live like 1+1=7. I can't actually live like that. . . . Once I know that 1+1=2 I have to live authentically. That's the way it is. I don't care what the fallout is." Exactly. Thanks for saying that, Carah.
The way Carah speaks is not just Carah - it is generational. It is the way a new generation speaks. Language shifts. Language is fluid. No apology is needed.
You know what's funny? The same "spirit" that we said was the holy ghost confirming the truthfulness of the gospel feels exactly the same as the feeling I got when I realized it was all bullshit. Is that the holy ghost saying, "The church is true." Then later saying, "Haha, just kidding, I lied to you." Great interview, John!
Hard to know if the "spirit" you're feeling is really from GOD, or from YOURSELF, succumbing to promises of glory that can be yours if you join the "one true church on earth." The ultimate attainment of GODHOOD4yourself, is only offered by the Mormon church (D&C132:1-4, end of 19, all of 20, 37, etc)... The feelings have to be similar, and hard to distinguish between, I'd think...
Isn’t it interesting that... and I see it now as a big red flag... isn’t it interesting that when our children show independence and independence of thought as teenager or young adults it creates such huge amount of anxiety in us as parents when we are raising them in the gospel? Isn’t it interesting that independence signals potential danger to their spirituality rather than seeing it as a wonderful developmental leap towards maturity?
I'm so relieved I don't have to explain modesty to my daughter anymore. It was hard to say "god wants us to cover our beautiful bodies" without feeling like I was telling her she should be hiding a shameful dirty thing (her body).
I’ve been binge watching mormon stories and Carah co-hosting. Didn’t think as a over thirty year old woman I could still get a crush on someone I’ve never met but here we are xD Had to come listen to her story. All the best for you!
I'm 67 years old and the f-bombs don't bother me a bit. Of course, I've never been Mormon, but I find all of these moronic Mormon facts just fascinating! Thanks, John, for giving these new ex-mos a place to tell their stories and heal. They certainly need and deserve it.
I laughed and learned so much from Carah. She's incredibly intelligent and inspirational, and I really appreciated how she emphasized that we all need to be more gentle with everyone questioning their faith transition.
I've been loving Carah as a cohost, but have yet to listen to her story. I FUCKING LOVE HER!!!! She is just the "edgy" young person to help deprogram some of the leftovers that are still with John. No offense, love you always, John, but she is just so cool and she brings new life and humor to the show. LOVE!!!!
I fuckin love you Carah! You're a beautiful person! I'm an ex-Jehovah's witness and have been listening/watching a lot of ex Mormon, JW, scientologist stories. They are all so similar. Thank you for sharing your story. I'm so happy for you and your family. You have broken the cycle for your children and given them the opportunity to live an authentic life. That is beautiful!!! Amazing interview! Thank you for sharing Carah!
Lol. I remember asking my mom if God laughed. I was about 6 then. She thought about it a second, and said he must enjoy funny things, since we do, so he would laugh, too. I liked that. (Not ever Mormon, but interested in these stories.)
Carah, you are so brilliant, engaging, and impactful--a role model to me. I was raised Jehovah's Witness and it was a difficult way out. What you represent, beyond all else to me, is that, no matter what our "pinholes" have been, we all have more freedom than we often believe we have--and we can exercise it with love. Thank you for all your bravery, wit, and generosity of spirit. This is my fave Mormon Story episode 💗
Speaking of experiences that bring personal awareness to problems with the church... One of the biggest things that made me realize that the prophet and apostles don’t know even their own theology was something as seemingly simple as the word of wisdom. When the word came down that caffeine was officially not a problem, I gave myself permission to think critically about the other parts of the WoW. I had been setting this thing on the shelf for a long time. The WoW says hot drinks, and examples used were coffee & tea, and those became the definition. I asked about hot chocolate and hot soups when I was a teenager and got shut down. But I started thinking after the caffeine announcement, “well, what about cold coffee and cold tea? The WoW doesn’t list C & T specifically so cold must be ok.” I did some research. My oldest daughter did some research and we came to the conclusion that, if it’s cold, it must be ok. Fast forward to some time later when the church (under Nelson) officially announced that the definition of “hot drinks” also includes iced coffee, iced tea or anything else that has a coffee or tea in its ingredients. I thought, “these guys either don’t know the ins and outs of their own doctrine or they are putting a foot down because the church has this reputation for its member not partaking of those things and they fear there would be weird fallout or mass confusion and questioning if they say that coffee and tea are allowed in their cold drink form.
This has been one of my favorites so far. I love the cussing. I left Christian fundamentalism as a teen and went hard af with cursing because I finally felt free to say whatever I thought without the worry of god smiting me. I still love cuss words. So damn much.
Just found Mormon stories about a month ago, wanted to hear Carah’s story. I think she is amazing and a very strong person. I had different experiences and a different outlook leaving the church but loved to hear hers. Thanks for sharing!
There are obviously times when cursing is inappropriate, but I think that it is completely fine for a podcast. In our Mormon lives we were constantly filtering what we were going to say. In a podcast I enjoy people who are not filtering what they want to say and speak their truth. I’m tired of the mental gymnastics that I had to go through. I will agree that cursing in an argument automatically ruins your argument with some people.
My mormon friend in Calvert County Maryland shouted again and again, "God makes us suffer because he wants us to GROW and LEARN!" Yet fifteen seconds before that she ADMITTED: 1.Her god is perfect, all powerful, all knowing. 2. God created EVERYTHING, including all humans. 3. So.............WHY WHY WHY not just create humans perfect in the first place? How dare you! Humans cannot understand god's plan! Well, if that is true, how are you so CERTAIN you know the truth about your god? Humans wrote your books. Humans run your church! /So how do you know the facts?????? Her only answer boiled down to: BECAUSE OF MY FEEEEEEEELINGS MY FEEEELINGS MY FEEELINGS!!!!!! Sorry, but extremely typical of not so bright females. I asked her to PROVE it.\ GET ON YOUR KNEES AND GROVEL AND BEG FOR FORGIVENESS FROM GOD was her answer My friend is lifelong Mormon, and the ONLY thing that matters in her life is "BE HAPPY" no matter how much poverty or disease or misery. Her only hope of heaven on earth is worship of Donald Trump. To her, Jesus and her Bishop and Trump are all exactly the same. She has suffered so so so so much and clings to this crap. Remember the ads "Friends don't let friends drive drunk"?
What breaks my heart the most is the number of members suffering from pain due to their worries over “worthiness”. The pain of so called sexual “sin”, sexuality “sin”, feeling lesser than because of your racial background. It is quite literally destroying lives. I just want to put my arms around them to tell them they are enough and valuable as they are. I think the LDS blueprint is only good on the surface but when you dig deeper there is too much guilt and shame producing doctrine.
Wow. I finally heard someone describe their father as their younger brother! I've heard many shares over the years and have not run into someone with a very immature father. My father was the golden child in the family. My dad also has some kind of a personality disorder (constant temper tantrums and meldowns and screaming) , so everything revolved around him.
I 100% relate to that cycle of producing a lot of content and letting your house fall apart, then taking a break until my house is clean, then starting the cycle all over again 😂
My grandmother was a very literate sophisticated woman. She married another educated person who had a problem of gambling. He deserted the family when my Grandma was pregnant with my mother. He took the family's furniture etc and sold it to start over. He gambled it away instead. My grandmother studied, passed the barber's test ( using boys in the family to practise), then passed the beautician license-.she opened her own shop, put all three children thu college, bought a home and a car. A real feminist who happened to be Mormon. She could also swear if necessary, once at a judge in court!
I have a friend at work whose wife divorced him when he admitted that he didn't believe. I also have several others who are afraid to tell their wives.
I'm not a member of the church, but I had the same experience with the Joseph Smith movie when I visited the site in Vermont. This LDS couple was in tears and I was thinking, "You really buy this? It seems like such obvious propaganda." But I didn't grow up in the church and I can understand how indoctrination from the earliest ages can be incredibly powerful.
I watched the complete interview in September,2021. I'm so happy, Carah that you joined the Mormon Stories team. I apologize for other comments mis-spelling your name.
Our stake also did that Joseph Smith testimony art project thing. I did a simple portrait, but I didn't use a reference, and it wasn't as impressive as some of the other thing I'd drawn before. I was really deep in the church at the time, bit for some reason I didn't really care about that art project. I remember afterwards, my dad kind of shamed me about not doing a better job. Him pulling me aside, saying "You could have outdone yourself" still lives in the back of my mind.
I'm like Carah. I never really had a bad experience in the church. There were a few minor things here and there. As I entered young adulthood, it slowly lost importance in my life and my faith was struggling. Learning about Joseph Smith's polygamy broke my shelf. I'm almost 23 and haven't gone to church in a year. Everything you lovely people are doing is so helpful to people like me who need help making sense of all of it ❤
Darn, I bet I missed the party. I'm watching this about 2 years late because I discovered MSP only a couple months ago and I have 20 years' stories to catch up on. But Carah you are absolutely the coolest and funniest person. I am so tickled when you and John L are together. I would love to meet Carah, John D, Margi, John L and Gerardo. So have another party (make it a fundraiser of some type) and I will travel up there to meet you all. You are heroes. I don’t say that lightly. You care about ppl and are literally saving lives!
Really interesting and entertaining. I grew up in the 60's in a dense Mormon community. My 4th grade teacher spanked me in front of the class for calling a Mormon girl a "liar". You can imagine what I thought of "mormons"!
It was funny to me when John pointed out it was the most F bombs ever so far and I hadn't even heard them. I too am a potty mouth when I am not thinking about it. I am completely desensitized and I am almost proud of it after 27 years of pure repression in the church.
So if nobody cares about f bombs - are they really even bombs anymore?? The cursing ban is an interesting illustration of how we're sensitized to be offended.
Such a great interview and episode! I've seen a few of Carah's videos on IG. Her compilations with Zelph are my fav (don't have tiktok). I was really amazed at her candor and honestly about her not changing how she feels about her beliefs to please her father during his illness. That takes a lot of courage and boundaries. My family is nevermo so I don't know what it's like to deal with tbm family post faith transition. But my in laws are tbm, and I can only imagine that their dying wish will be for my husband and I to return to the church. Not going to happen for me, I can't speak for my husband. Also, was it accepted that most people believed the earth was 6000 years old in the church?? I never remember coming across that. I didn't go to seminary (convert) but I don't remember ever hearing anything in church or in college religion classes about literally believing the earth was 6000 years old. Even in my young adult believing years, I always believed in evolution and kinda thought the Bible was a bunch of mythical stories 🤷🏻♀️ Guess I was nuanced from the get go!
Adrienne, I remember a series of books in my parents library, The First Thousand Years, The Second Thousand Years...on up to six..the idea was definitely out there. When I asked about them my dad explained it to me as a theory, he pretty clearly didn't believe it. I've met protestants who believe it, I don't think it originated with the LDS.
I like the fact Carah can be herself and tell her mormon story in her own language. Maybe John should start a "mormon stories raw" series where the language can be what comes naturally to the folks participating.
I would rather he didn't. It sounds as if such a programme would create more heat than light. More tension that peace. We have seen how Fairmormon and Kwaku tried that approach of being more edgy and rude....and they fell flat on their faces.
The reversal is the Mormon name is because search engines bring up ANTI-mormon items. By only using the formal copy-written name, they can control the information.
2:38:00 if the parents don’t indoctrinate the kids, the congregation will. This was so true in my case where my mom wasn’t a super believing Mormon (drank coffee, beer occasionally) but because I attended church every Sunday (my mom couldn’t because she was working) I became indoctrinated and I felt that I was Nephi. I wanted to serve a mission and served a mission, I did.
Even though I've been out for almost a decade now, here perspective is really helpful. "Mormonism is a blueprint for how to live your life". There's a lot that maybe I wasn't able to process when I first left, because it was hard for me to see it objectively, because the emotions were too strong to see that clearly.
Menstruation at girl's camp is kinda a running gag. Especially first years. You get a bunch of 12-year-olds together with a bunch of older girls and women in a really confined space and it is a recipe for first-time periods. I was in charge of first years one time and wound up giving away all my just-in-case pads because none of them were prepared. There really should be a PSA for parents before girl's camp to send their girls with all the sanitary supplies.
3:22:47 Wonderful interview! I agree that comedy is helpful to de-convert people and introduce laughter at uncomfortable statements. My TBM dad shared the South Park clip where “the Mormons got it right.” Definitely funny and planted a seed to think about the arrogance of religion.
Prop 8 was the absolute nail in the coffin for 2 of my siblings in regards to discussing the church with my mom... Previous we would endure my moms frequent discussions of the church and frequent comments about all the wonderful things about her church.. Once it was discovered that my mom who has very close friends in the LGBT community had actively campaigned against prop8 strictly because her church had directed her to do it even though her own beliefs did not align... From there fwd if she even starts to mention something about her church she is quickly reminded of how disgusting that whole situation was and that we had an agreement that we all recognize her church is not perfect and we agreed to no longer talk about it!...
Being involved in church Public Affairs was what made it obvious to me that I had to leave. I relate to that icky feeling so well. Ugh. The service was cool, but the advertising of it and the behind the scenes stuff that happens was just awful.
You know who does “award ceremonies” for civic leaders to help get what they want (construction development, etc) ... SCIENTOLOGY. It’s totally a culty thing to do. 💯
I adore Carah, how she just lays it all out there... she's so very genuine. And she's right about Tanner, he is a sex god. Mormon propaganda is effective because people want to be reassured and feel comfortable in their beliefs. If some 'expert' expresses renforcement of a deeply held belief then it must absolutely true. Nothing to see here, move along, get ye to church.
@2:52:00 I'm remembering my divorce from the church and really it was a lot like a divorce. I was mad, and betrayed at the behavior of the members... and just separated myself. Refused to attend, even though I still considered myself Mormon. And it took years of me being separated, and even after considering myself a pagan or witch for a while I still hadn't fully reconciled the full untruthfullness of the church. I just focused on the harms done to me by members. So I got started down my deprogramming process well before I finally read the CES letter and was like "wow... I had no idea, I thought those were just rumors." But yeah, it was a lot like a divorce brought on by separation, where you just leave and you're slowly come to terms with the fact that that relationship was the worst. For those questioning, remove yourself, discover yourself, seek answers when you're ready.
2:15:50 this is what really started my trek to realization... I went to BYU-Idaho and got a certificate in social media marketing and learned how the Church uses members to market for them.. it's brilliant tho.. they've amassed millions from unpaid labor under the disguise of a prophetic church calling from God.
What an impressive person. Calls it how it is. Not many can do this. And free will is a total illusion. Anyone who analyzes it should quickly figure it out. And of course it feels like we make decisions, that’s why it’s an illusion 😂😂. You don’t choose anything at all. But especially important things. You don’t choose your upbringing, environment, or your wants. Or convictions.. you either are convinced or you’re not. For example, free will. Right now you might be convinced it exists.. but if you actually spend an hour or two listening and reviewing the points your conviction will change. it’s not by choice that’s for sure.
I was barely 17 when I had to have almost the exact same convo with the bishop in 2003. Thank goodness my dad wasn’t in the church and my parents divorced because that was my last day at church and I moved in with my dad and never went back. Edit: I know my situation was unique having divorced parents and a non-member dad and I got very lucky.
52:51 I was 1st runner up for my pagent my talent was me in a pink tutu blowing into a conch shell I hummed twinkle twinkle into it then blew it at the end and had people laughing 😅 I didn't even want to be in it but my ward laurel president made me. 🤣 I was a 6 year in a newer ward and closed off. Plus no one knew I was actually pregnant at the time 😵💫 I hid it! Also attended Timpview!
Okay, I get he was ‘roasting you.’ However… I remember your Mormon Stories episode. He was your first kiss, you were barely legal and still living at home. He was in his late twenties and had experienced the world. And yet he’s complaining about you being co-dependent? I mean, what did he expect? You hadn’t even been able to experience the world yet or find out who you were growing into as a full adult. It’s like getting mad because you take the cake out of the oven early and it’s not cooked in the middle. That’s your fault. Not the cakes’.
This is true about cover ups! I personally witnessed this as an LCSW working for LDS Family Services! Priesthood protection and the politics of certain names in community.
Alcoholism has to be in the top 5 reasons people convert to Mormonism. If you are ever on a mission, just get a list of the town drunkards, and visit with their families.
I was never as judgemental as when I was a TBM...I am so much more Christ-like in my unconditional love for people (still have room to grow) now that I have left the LDS Church.
Love these podcasts on Mormon Stories. It really does prove the point that all religions are man made for one thing.......and that is control of the masses. Still amazes me how in this age of information that the delusion of religious practices still exist. Well done for breaking out and escaping this cult 👍
There are so many red flags in the church. What about brothers Jared and Moriancumer? Moriancumer??? Are you effing kidding me? 😂🤣 "Let's name this one Jared and this one Moriancumer"
Great interview! A lot of your thoughts and experiences are very relatable. Atheism is so very different in reality than what I was programmed to believe as a kid of the cold war.
I grew up in Mesa, AZ and I’m not Mormon at all but every single one of my friends were. I remember going to church with them as a kid in elementary and junior high school soooo often. My mom is Christian and would do the whole equate the two thing all the time. So she never cared how often I would randomly go to seminary at Mesa High or anything. My dads entire family is Mormon but my parents weren’t together my entire life so it was a lot of judgment from my dads side of the family but not from my kind inviting Mormon friends or their families. I’m pagan and live in Kentucky now but I love watching Mormon Stories, Nuance Hoe and Zelph because I was literally raised around nothing but Mormons and it’s just such eye opening relatable content. Y’all are incredible!
Santa Monica! I used to live in the Sea Castle Apartments until it went down in the earthquake. They have rebuilt the building but did not want to move back and run into my ex or his family. There is nothing better than living on the beach and S.M. is really an excellent town
Respect and love your parents. It doesn't mean they're always right. If I listened to mine, I'd still be a roman catholic. I found the truth and have created my own path.
They treat me the same way in the Mormon church, not how negative or disrespectful people treat me in the church, not people shutting down or backing up Trump's negative views of this country, but me swearing, drinking sweet tea & being around my brother who drinks Alcohol 😆 that's where we cross the line
"What are these criticisms that you're even debunking?"< This is how I started to feel during the few times I could attend relief society (always teaching primary or YW) and read the book along with the lesson. Why bring up "persecution" and never actually explain it fully... just explain it away.
An ex Mormon potty mouth comedian. I like her. There is nothing wrong with swearing as long as you have a good sense of humour and genuine self-esteem.
Thanks for having me, John! Cursing and all. This is was so fun.
@@naviblue8912 tooooo kind. thanks though.
Thanks for being authentic!
I spit out my drink when you said "Oh No! They're stupid..... I'm a smart person!" If I had a dollar for every moment I felt that way at church back in the day....😂😂😂
you're fucking dope and i hope you read this as aggressively as i'm typing it because i love you and you have made me laugh while im ugly crying about something my family has said to me
Awesome!
I have felt so lonely in this process and as I listened to this I suddenly don’t feel as lonely. I’ve experienced the same thoughts and emotions and it’s nice to know that I am not alone or going crazy. You were able to put into words those same emotions so well. Thank you.
❤️❤️❤️
I would never have encountered Carah on TikTok, so thanks to both of you. So many things I love about this, but one that I will be quoting (at about 2:47:30): "I don't care if it is more advantageous for me to live like 1+1=7. I can't actually live like that. . . . Once I know that 1+1=2 I have to live authentically. That's the way it is. I don't care what the fallout is." Exactly. Thanks for saying that, Carah.
yep there is something to be said for having integrity over “choosing to believe” just because it might be mire advantageous
Yes, that and ‘I don’t care what cult members think about me’ (paraphrased)
Yes, yes, yes!!!!!
The way Carah speaks is not just Carah - it is generational. It is the way a new generation speaks. Language shifts. Language is fluid. No apology is needed.
Agreed. For some reason certain emotions can’t be conveyed without using cuss words. At least for me and people around my age.
You know what's funny? The same "spirit" that we said was the holy ghost confirming the truthfulness of the gospel feels exactly the same as the feeling I got when I realized it was all bullshit. Is that the holy ghost saying, "The church is true." Then later saying, "Haha, just kidding, I lied to you." Great interview, John!
Yuuuuup! Same feeling, isn’t that crazy?!?
Hard to know if the "spirit" you're feeling is really from GOD, or from YOURSELF, succumbing to promises of glory that can be yours if you join the "one true church on earth." The ultimate attainment of GODHOOD4yourself, is only offered by the Mormon church (D&C132:1-4, end of 19, all of 20, 37, etc)... The feelings have to be similar, and hard to distinguish between, I'd think...
Omg I thought I was crazy when that exact thing happened to me! Glad I am not the only one!!
@@julianaklein5190 It's call ASMR (en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ASMR), a physiological response that can be elicited easily.
Weird that I felt the spirit while watching really good movies and TV shows, but never at church 🤔
Isn’t it interesting that... and I see it now as a big red flag... isn’t it interesting that when our children show independence and independence of thought as teenager or young adults it creates such huge amount of anxiety in us as parents when we are raising them in the gospel? Isn’t it interesting that independence signals potential danger to their spirituality rather than seeing it as a wonderful developmental leap towards maturity?
I'm so relieved I don't have to explain modesty to my daughter anymore. It was hard to say "god wants us to cover our beautiful bodies" without feeling like I was telling her she should be hiding a shameful dirty thing (her body).
@@h.r.9563 just from your comment I can tell your a very caring,kind and loving mother. I think your daughter is very lucky to have you
I’ve been binge watching mormon stories and Carah co-hosting. Didn’t think as a over thirty year old woman I could still get a crush on someone I’ve never met but here we are xD Had to come listen to her story. All the best for you!
I'm 67 years old and the f-bombs don't bother me a bit. Of course, I've never been Mormon, but I find all of these moronic Mormon facts just fascinating! Thanks, John, for giving these new ex-mos a place to tell their stories and heal. They certainly need and deserve it.
This is right up there as one of my all time favorite Mormon Stories podcast. Carah is a true delight. Thanks John.
I laughed and learned so much from Carah. She's incredibly intelligent and inspirational, and I really appreciated how she emphasized that we all need to be more gentle with everyone questioning their faith transition.
Wow! Thank you!
I've been loving Carah as a cohost, but have yet to listen to her story. I FUCKING LOVE HER!!!! She is just the "edgy" young person to help deprogram some of the leftovers that are still with John. No offense, love you always, John, but she is just so cool and she brings new life and humor to the show. LOVE!!!!
Dalton! Aw thanks!
I fuckin love you Carah! You're a beautiful person! I'm an ex-Jehovah's witness and have been listening/watching a lot of ex Mormon, JW, scientologist stories. They are all so similar. Thank you for sharing your story. I'm so happy for you and your family. You have broken the cycle for your children and given them the opportunity to live an authentic life. That is beautiful!!! Amazing interview! Thank you for sharing Carah!
The Church was a stepping stone for me, and now I see that I have "leveled up" out of it. I agree with you.
Congratulations for graduating from the Mormon church.
I’ve been a fan for 6 months. I’m finally seeing the OG interview. I love it! I have a lot more understanding now.
Yay!
I used to tell God jokes when I prayed. I thought he was my best friend so that's what I would do with them
Lol. I remember asking my mom if God laughed. I was about 6 then. She thought about it a second, and said he must enjoy funny things, since we do, so he would laugh, too. I liked that. (Not ever Mormon, but interested in these stories.)
Outloud meditation is still super helpful for me. I'll tell jokes to the universe now, make myself laugh.
"It was traumatizing that my joke didn't land 😭" 😂🤣🤣
Carah, you are so brilliant, engaging, and impactful--a role model to me. I was raised Jehovah's Witness and it was a difficult way out. What you represent, beyond all else to me, is that, no matter what our "pinholes" have been, we all have more freedom than we often believe we have--and we can exercise it with love. Thank you for all your bravery, wit, and generosity of spirit. This is my fave Mormon Story episode 💗
Speaking of experiences that bring personal awareness to problems with the church... One of the biggest things that made me realize that the prophet and apostles don’t know even their own theology was something as seemingly simple as the word of wisdom. When the word came down that caffeine was officially not a problem, I gave myself permission to think critically about the other parts of the WoW. I had been setting this thing on the shelf for a long time. The WoW says hot drinks, and examples used were coffee & tea, and those became the definition. I asked about hot chocolate and hot soups when I was a teenager and got shut down.
But I started thinking after the caffeine announcement, “well, what about cold coffee and cold tea? The WoW doesn’t list C & T specifically so cold must be ok.” I did some research. My oldest daughter did some research and we came to the conclusion that, if it’s cold, it must be ok. Fast forward to some time later when the church (under Nelson) officially announced that the definition of “hot drinks” also includes iced coffee, iced tea or anything else that has a coffee or tea in its ingredients. I thought, “these guys either don’t know the ins and outs of their own doctrine or they are putting a foot down because the church has this reputation for its member not partaking of those things and they fear there would be weird fallout or mass confusion and questioning if they say that coffee and tea are allowed in their cold drink form.
This has been one of my favorites so far. I love the cussing. I left Christian fundamentalism as a teen and went hard af with cursing because I finally felt free to say whatever I thought without the worry of god smiting me. I still love cuss words. So damn much.
Lots to like about this interview. One of my favorite parts was describing the joy of being out after the pain of finding out.
"Do not joke about pregnancy with the son of an apostle, they will not find it funny". PLSSSS LOLLLL
Tattoo it on your heart, Summer
Refreshing, articulate, candid and fun, Carah carries the torch for community college dropouts everywhere.
Loud and proud 🥂
Just found Mormon stories about a month ago, wanted to hear Carah’s story. I think she is amazing and a very strong person. I had different experiences and a different outlook leaving the church but loved to hear hers. Thanks for sharing!
I'm just finding this today.
There are obviously times when cursing is inappropriate, but I think that it is completely fine for a podcast. In our Mormon lives we were constantly filtering what we were going to say. In a podcast I enjoy people who are not filtering what they want to say and speak their truth. I’m tired of the mental gymnastics that I had to go through.
I will agree that cursing in an argument automatically ruins your argument with some people.
Cursing is fucking always appropriate
The only time I would notice the swears is when John would point them out.
@@thailerZAP why would he do that? How fucking obnoxious
My mormon friend in Calvert County Maryland shouted again and again, "God makes us suffer because he wants us to GROW and LEARN!"
Yet fifteen seconds before that she ADMITTED:
1.Her god is perfect, all powerful, all knowing.
2. God created EVERYTHING, including all humans.
3. So.............WHY WHY WHY not just create humans perfect in the first place?
How dare you! Humans cannot understand god's plan!
Well, if that is true, how are you so CERTAIN you know the truth about your god?
Humans wrote your books. Humans run your church! /So how do you know the facts??????
Her only answer boiled down to: BECAUSE OF MY FEEEEEEEELINGS MY FEEEELINGS MY FEEELINGS!!!!!!
Sorry, but extremely typical of not so bright females.
I asked her to PROVE it.\
GET ON YOUR KNEES AND GROVEL AND BEG FOR FORGIVENESS FROM GOD
was her answer
My friend is lifelong Mormon, and the ONLY thing that matters in her life is "BE HAPPY" no matter how much poverty or disease or misery.
Her only hope of heaven on earth is worship of Donald Trump.
To her, Jesus and her Bishop and Trump are all exactly the same.
She has suffered so so so so much and clings to this crap.
Remember the ads "Friends don't let friends drive drunk"?
What breaks my heart the most is the number of members suffering from pain due to their worries over “worthiness”. The pain of so called sexual “sin”, sexuality “sin”, feeling lesser than because of your racial background. It is quite literally destroying lives. I just want to put my arms around them to tell them they are enough and valuable as they are.
I think the LDS blueprint is only good on the surface but when you dig deeper there is too much guilt and shame producing doctrine.
Great interview. Seeing “through a pinhole” is such an appropriate analogy for the way you think inside the church. Thanks Carah.
🥰
Awesome!!! Glad she is on Mormon Stories and that she made a RUclips channel!!
Wow. I finally heard someone describe their father as their younger brother! I've heard many shares over the years and have not run into someone with a very immature father. My father was the golden child in the family. My dad also has some kind of a personality disorder (constant temper tantrums and meldowns and screaming) , so everything revolved around him.
I feel like I'm watching Carahs job interview here haha love this BTW.
I 100% relate to that cycle of producing a lot of content and letting your house fall apart, then taking a break until my house is clean, then starting the cycle all over again 😂
My grandmother was a very literate sophisticated woman. She married another educated person who had a problem of gambling. He deserted the family when my Grandma was pregnant with my mother. He took the family's furniture etc and sold it to start over. He gambled it away instead. My grandmother studied, passed the barber's test ( using boys in the family to practise), then passed the beautician license-.she opened her own shop, put all three children thu college, bought a home and a car. A real feminist who happened to be Mormon. She could also swear if necessary, once at a judge in court!
And she still believed all the Mormon doctrine?
Thank you John and Carrah! Her wisdom exceeds her creativity and diligence. Loved every minute. Hope the best for both of you.
John's catchphrase: " I love it "
🙂
I have a friend at work whose wife divorced him when he admitted that he didn't believe. I also have several others who are afraid to tell their wives.
That's sad
I'm not a member of the church, but I had the same experience with the Joseph Smith movie when I visited the site in Vermont. This LDS couple was in tears and I was thinking, "You really buy this? It seems like such obvious propaganda." But I didn't grow up in the church and I can understand how indoctrination from the earliest ages can be incredibly powerful.
This has been my favourite interview of yours. So glad to have discovered Carah!
Aw thanks
I watched the complete interview in September,2021. I'm so happy, Carah that you joined the Mormon Stories team. I apologize for other comments mis-spelling your name.
I love Carah! She’s amazing and such an amazing pillar for our exmo community!!
Aw thanks Monica!
Carah, you shook the lady’s hand with the nose bleed hand!!!!!! I am laughing so hard right now!!!!!!🤣
Our stake also did that Joseph Smith testimony art project thing. I did a simple portrait, but I didn't use a reference, and it wasn't as impressive as some of the other thing I'd drawn before. I was really deep in the church at the time, bit for some reason I didn't really care about that art project.
I remember afterwards, my dad kind of shamed me about not doing a better job. Him pulling me aside, saying "You could have outdone yourself" still lives in the back of my mind.
Swearing is very normal in my country. My kids are allowed to swear but they get told not to swear AT eachother.
I'm like Carah. I never really had a bad experience in the church. There were a few minor things here and there. As I entered young adulthood, it slowly lost importance in my life and my faith was struggling. Learning about Joseph Smith's polygamy broke my shelf. I'm almost 23 and haven't gone to church in a year. Everything you lovely people are doing is so helpful to people like me who need help making sense of all of it ❤
President Neilson and then after him President Oaks are going to be the 1-2 punch that will drive a lot of people out of the church.
Darn, I bet I missed the party. I'm watching this about 2 years late because I discovered MSP only a couple months ago and I have 20 years' stories to catch up on. But Carah you are absolutely the coolest and funniest person. I am so tickled when you and John L are together. I would love to meet Carah, John D, Margi, John L and Gerardo. So have another party (make it a fundraiser of some type) and I will travel up there to meet you all.
You are heroes. I don’t say that lightly. You care about ppl and are literally saving lives!
"Don't blame things on a conspiracy that are just incompetence.". Brilliant!
Really interesting and entertaining. I grew up in the 60's in a dense Mormon community. My 4th grade teacher spanked me in front of the class for calling a Mormon girl a "liar". You can imagine what I thought of "mormons"!
"naughty, naughty words" I can't wait. My sis in law sent me over here and said I must listen :D
It was funny to me when John pointed out it was the most F bombs ever so far and I hadn't even heard them. I too am a potty mouth when I am not thinking about it. I am completely desensitized and I am almost proud of it after 27 years of pure repression in the church.
😂❤️
I was too desensitized to noticed while saying them.
So if nobody cares about f bombs - are they really even bombs anymore?? The cursing ban is an interesting illustration of how we're sensitized to be offended.
It detracts from her beauty and does not add to the discourse.
I LOVE listening to Carah. Looking forward to more of her on Mormon Stories.
Lived in Mesa for 20 years & definitely learned all the good & bad about the church & Mormons. Great interview!!!
So glad to come back and watch Carahs story. I relate to so much of this, although I came from a 'nondenominational' Christian church.
Such a great interview and episode! I've seen a few of Carah's videos on IG. Her compilations with Zelph are my fav (don't have tiktok). I was really amazed at her candor and honestly about her not changing how she feels about her beliefs to please her father during his illness. That takes a lot of courage and boundaries. My family is nevermo so I don't know what it's like to deal with tbm family post faith transition. But my in laws are tbm, and I can only imagine that their dying wish will be for my husband and I to return to the church. Not going to happen for me, I can't speak for my husband.
Also, was it accepted that most people believed the earth was 6000 years old in the church?? I never remember coming across that. I didn't go to seminary (convert) but I don't remember ever hearing anything in church or in college religion classes about literally believing the earth was 6000 years old. Even in my young adult believing years, I always believed in evolution and kinda thought the Bible was a bunch of mythical stories 🤷🏻♀️ Guess I was nuanced from the get go!
Adrienne, I remember a series of books in my parents library, The First Thousand Years, The Second Thousand Years...on up to six..the idea was definitely out there. When I asked about them my dad explained it to me as a theory, he pretty clearly didn't believe it. I've met protestants who believe it, I don't think it originated with the LDS.
I like the fact Carah can be herself and tell her mormon story in her own language. Maybe John should start a "mormon stories raw" series where the language can be what comes naturally to the folks participating.
I would rather he didn't. It sounds as if such a programme would create more heat than light. More tension that peace. We have seen how Fairmormon and Kwaku tried that approach of being more edgy and rude....and they fell flat on their faces.
Mormon Stories PG 13
Woman speaks her mind. Very refreshing. Very insightful.
The reversal is the Mormon name is because search engines bring up ANTI-mormon items. By only using the formal copy-written name, they can control the information.
Did the Spirit tell you this?
I've been waiting for this one! Can't wait!
2:38:00 if the parents don’t indoctrinate the kids, the congregation will. This was so true in my case where my mom wasn’t a super believing Mormon (drank coffee, beer occasionally) but because I attended church every Sunday (my mom couldn’t because she was working) I became indoctrinated and I felt that I was Nephi. I wanted to serve a mission and served a mission, I did.
Even though I've been out for almost a decade now, here perspective is really helpful. "Mormonism is a blueprint for how to live your life". There's a lot that maybe I wasn't able to process when I first left, because it was hard for me to see it objectively, because the emotions were too strong to see that clearly.
Menstruation at girl's camp is kinda a running gag. Especially first years. You get a bunch of 12-year-olds together with a bunch of older girls and women in a really confined space and it is a recipe for first-time periods. I was in charge of first years one time and wound up giving away all my just-in-case pads because none of them were prepared. There really should be a PSA for parents before girl's camp to send their girls with all the sanitary supplies.
3:22:47 Wonderful interview! I agree that comedy is helpful to de-convert people and introduce laughter at uncomfortable statements.
My TBM dad shared the South Park clip where “the Mormons got it right.” Definitely funny and planted a seed to think about the arrogance of religion.
🤣🤣 The amount of "F Bombs" is almost as many as the "And it came to pass" in the BOM!
S A And fits into the sentence about as rationally too.
Prop 8 was the absolute nail in the coffin for 2 of my siblings in regards to discussing the church with my mom... Previous we would endure my moms frequent discussions of the church and frequent comments about all the wonderful things about her church.. Once it was discovered that my mom who has very close friends in the LGBT community had actively campaigned against prop8 strictly because her church had directed her to do it even though her own beliefs did not align... From there fwd if she even starts to mention something about her church she is quickly reminded of how disgusting that whole situation was and that we had an agreement that we all recognize her church is not perfect and we agreed to no longer talk about it!...
Being involved in church Public Affairs was what made it obvious to me that I had to leave. I relate to that icky feeling so well. Ugh. The service was cool, but the advertising of it and the behind the scenes stuff that happens was just awful.
You know who does “award ceremonies” for civic leaders to help get what they want (construction development, etc) ... SCIENTOLOGY. It’s totally a culty thing to do. 💯
I found it interesting that when he mentioned 2 or 3 times early about the language that I hadn’t even noticed any bad language.
Loved this interview. So great
I adore Carah, how she just lays it all out there... she's so very genuine. And she's right about Tanner, he is a sex god. Mormon propaganda is effective because people want to be reassured and feel comfortable in their beliefs. If some 'expert' expresses renforcement of a deeply held belief then it must absolutely true. Nothing to see here, move along, get ye to church.
@2:52:00 I'm remembering my divorce from the church and really it was a lot like a divorce. I was mad, and betrayed at the behavior of the members... and just separated myself. Refused to attend, even though I still considered myself Mormon. And it took years of me being separated, and even after considering myself a pagan or witch for a while I still hadn't fully reconciled the full untruthfullness of the church. I just focused on the harms done to me by members. So I got started down my deprogramming process well before I finally read the CES letter and was like "wow... I had no idea, I thought those were just rumors." But yeah, it was a lot like a divorce brought on by separation, where you just leave and you're slowly come to terms with the fact that that relationship was the worst. For those questioning, remove yourself, discover yourself, seek answers when you're ready.
2:15:50 this is what really started my trek to realization... I went to BYU-Idaho and got a certificate in social media marketing and learned how the Church uses members to market for them.. it's brilliant tho.. they've amassed millions from unpaid labor under the disguise of a prophetic church calling from God.
What an impressive person. Calls it how it is. Not many can do this. And free will is a total illusion. Anyone who analyzes it should quickly figure it out. And of course it feels like we make decisions, that’s why it’s an illusion 😂😂. You don’t choose anything at all. But especially important things. You don’t choose your upbringing, environment, or your wants. Or convictions.. you either are convinced or you’re not. For example, free will. Right now you might be convinced it exists.. but if you actually spend an hour or two listening and reviewing the points your conviction will change. it’s not by choice that’s for sure.
I was barely 17 when I had to have almost the exact same convo with the bishop in 2003. Thank goodness my dad wasn’t in the church and my parents divorced because that was my last day at church and I moved in with my dad and never went back.
Edit: I know my situation was unique having divorced parents and a non-member dad and I got very lucky.
Thank you for the great shares! Loved all of your insights and stories about your journey! Carah and John, keep going!💛
Thanks! ❤️❤️❤️
52:51 I was 1st runner up for my pagent my talent was me in a pink tutu blowing into a conch shell I hummed twinkle twinkle into it then blew it at the end and had people laughing 😅 I didn't even want to be in it but my ward laurel president made me. 🤣 I was a 6 year in a newer ward and closed off. Plus no one knew I was actually pregnant at the time 😵💫 I hid it! Also attended Timpview!
Okay, I get he was ‘roasting you.’ However… I remember your Mormon Stories episode. He was your first kiss, you were barely legal and still living at home. He was in his late twenties and had experienced the world. And yet he’s complaining about you being co-dependent? I mean, what did he expect? You hadn’t even been able to experience the world yet or find out who you were growing into as a full adult. It’s like getting mad because you take the cake out of the oven early and it’s not cooked in the middle. That’s your fault. Not the cakes’.
This is true about cover ups! I personally witnessed this as an LCSW working for LDS Family Services! Priesthood protection and the politics of certain names in community.
When are you going to bring on Exmo Lex?
Alcoholism has to be in the top 5 reasons people convert to Mormonism. If you are ever on a mission, just get a list of the town drunkards, and visit with their families.
I was never as judgemental as when I was a TBM...I am so much more Christ-like in my unconditional love for people (still have room to grow) now that I have left the LDS Church.
Love these podcasts on Mormon Stories. It really does prove the point that all religions are man made for one thing.......and that is control of the masses. Still amazes me how in this age of information that the delusion of religious practices still exist.
Well done for breaking out and escaping this cult 👍
I downloaded tik tok just based on this interview, I've been avoiding it.
It’s been 10 hours since you wrote this. How’s it going 😏
@@CarahBurrell it's soooooo addictive! Hours... Gone... Just like that.
There are so many red flags in the church. What about brothers Jared and Moriancumer? Moriancumer??? Are you effing kidding me? 😂🤣 "Let's name this one Jared and this one Moriancumer"
😂
Great interview! A lot of your thoughts and experiences are very relatable. Atheism is so very different in reality than what I was programmed to believe as a kid of the cold war.
I grew up in Mesa, AZ and I’m not Mormon at all but every single one of my friends were. I remember going to church with them as a kid in elementary and junior high school soooo often. My mom is Christian and would do the whole equate the two thing all the time. So she never cared how often I would randomly go to seminary at Mesa High or anything. My dads entire family is Mormon but my parents weren’t together my entire life so it was a lot of judgment from my dads side of the family but not from my kind inviting Mormon friends or their families. I’m pagan and live in Kentucky now but I love watching Mormon Stories, Nuance Hoe and Zelph because I was literally raised around nothing but Mormons and it’s just such eye opening relatable content. Y’all are incredible!
❤❤❤
Santa Monica! I used to live in the Sea Castle Apartments until it went down in the earthquake. They have rebuilt the building but did not want to move back and run into my ex or his family. There is nothing better than living on the beach and S.M. is really an excellent town
Respect and love your parents. It doesn't mean they're always right. If I listened to mine, I'd still be a roman catholic. I found the truth and have created my own path.
One of the funniest exmo TikTokers! Great interview.
Thanks. That’s high praise, Professor.
They treat me the same way in the Mormon church, not how negative or disrespectful people treat me in the church, not people shutting down or backing up Trump's negative views of this country, but me swearing, drinking sweet tea & being around my brother who drinks Alcohol 😆 that's where we cross the line
Oh man some missonaries really did come to my door while I was smoking weed once. That was an awkward encounter 😂
3:26:00 Spanish speaking TikTok is mainly pro LDS content. Just FYI.
When I went to the temple, they said it was "figurative" with regard to the Adam and Eve story. Then they changed it.
"What are these criticisms that you're even debunking?"< This is how I started to feel during the few times I could attend relief society (always teaching primary or YW) and read the book along with the lesson. Why bring up "persecution" and never actually explain it fully... just explain it away.
Also please get ExMo Lex on!!!! You forgot about her!!!!
And have her husband on for a section of it too!! They’re great!
Yes, I love exmolex
I just watched Carah’s tiktoks. Brilliant. Cracked me up. 😂
Aw thanks 🥰
7:00 I thought the pentecostal church I was raised in was true because of the holy spirit. That's what all Christians in high demand churches think.
Ahh yay!!! Love Nuancehoe!!!
Fellow NE Ohioan here. Love your Toks!
@NuanceHoe is why I joined TikTok
My heart beats faster when people tell me this. I better bring👏🏻it👏🏻 now 😂😂
An ex Mormon potty mouth comedian. I like her. There is nothing wrong with swearing as long as you have a good sense of humour and genuine self-esteem.
Is the merch offer for party in person after covid still applicable?
Yes. My house. Every day.
I remember having the propaganda moment too, after working on mormon films. That was a pretty icky moment, for sure.