This video helped me to understand more why I'm critical of others and why I get so upset by other people's mistakes. I know that it is a trauma-driven response.
The hardest part of this to accept is that some of us won't ever be able to overcome it. We just soldier on, hoping to live without conflict. I avoid most people now and just stay hidden.
Kati Morton talked about toxic independence. Story of my life! I have to say the control has been amazing career-wise and I've been at the top of my game for 20 years. At the same time I was without a relationship until I was almost 30yo. 10 years forward, now I'm on a good path with wife and kids. I'm constantly learning about my ACOA past, trying to improve myself and understand what kind of example I want to set for my kids.
I struggle daily. It feels great knowing someone gets it. I’m not alone in this journey. I hope you’ll make a new video soon, I will be watching them all. I take notes to help in my daily life, I sincerely thank you.
3 months later still in the same boat. I try to help and get told off. I need to move on. I want to show this clip, but I dont want the anger. She is broken lady who I want to help, but why take the hard road I ask myself.
Such an important distinction you made about how intimacy is not only about the AOCA's inability to let go and trust, it's also very much about the ACOA letting the other person be themselves.
This video helped me to understand more why I'm critical of others and why I get so upset by other people's mistakes. I know that it is a trauma-driven response.
I am so glad you found it helpful - what amazing insight!
Its real simple as children are lives were out of control. Now as adult we want to control are lives.
The hardest part of this to accept is that some of us won't ever be able to overcome it. We just soldier on, hoping to live without conflict. I avoid most people now and just stay hidden.
Kati Morton talked about toxic independence. Story of my life! I have to say the control has been amazing career-wise and I've been at the top of my game for 20 years. At the same time I was without a relationship until I was almost 30yo. 10 years forward, now I'm on a good path with wife and kids. I'm constantly learning about my ACOA past, trying to improve myself and understand what kind of example I want to set for my kids.
Wow! That is soo impressive! Good work
I struggle daily. It feels great knowing someone gets it. I’m not alone in this journey. I hope you’ll make a new video soon, I will be watching them all. I take notes to help in my daily life, I sincerely thank you.
I'm glad you're enjoying, I am working on it :)
Thank you so much!!!
So true.
Unfortunately, yes, happy healing
3 months later still in the same boat. I try to help and get told off. I need to move on. I want to show this clip, but I dont want the anger. She is broken lady who I want to help, but why take the hard road I ask myself.
Excellent information, thank you.
Such an important distinction you made about how intimacy is not only about the AOCA's inability to let go and trust, it's also very much about the ACOA letting the other person be themselves.
Glad you enjoyed. Yes, allowing space for the other person to be themselves is a gift for both parties
Hi Sofya.
Hi :)
@@Dr.SofyaVass Hi :)