As a person who is "overweight" now but was constantly criticized for being "too skinny" by my own family constantly as a kid (I was a little "underweight" before puberty), being called skinny is not always a compliment. It can leave you with lifelong body dismorphia just as much as being called fat can.
This. I'm slightly overweight now but was super skinny when I was younger. I'm way more comfortable in my own skin now than I was. When I was pregnant I had HG(excessive vomiting) and the amount of cruel comments I got about my weight had me crying all the time. Just don't comment on other people's bodies at all.
This is most definitely me. I hated being skinny as a child and young adult. I'm in my 30s now and I probably could lose a little weight but I'm happy the way I am.
"Slim" story: NTA. Body shaming is body shaming. If the co-worker can't take it, she shouldn't be dishing it out. She's lucky that OP didn't "accidentally" douse her with cupcake batter for the repeated harassment.
I agree. Being called skinny can be just as traumatic as being called chunky. Also, manager has left the business open for a workplace lawsuit. If they are informed that someone is uncomfortable with their coworkers actions towards them, the complaining employee can sue for a hostile work environment because the manager refused to intervene.
So “slim” was pretty controlled - could’ve chosen far more offensive words (fatso…etc.). If anyone should apologize it’s the person who initiated the body objectification commentary.
I'm 50 years old and my body is feeling the effects of a lot of physical labor (bad knees, a bad shoulder, permanent nerve damage in my dominant hand and so forth), I have more facial scars than Freddy Krueger(long story) and I can feel my body breaking down further almost daily. You should always appreciate your *current* health, as things usually tends to go downhill 😁
As a person with a disability (I use a wheelchair) since birth I actually love questions. Nothing is too far for me, everyone is different I get that but I personally always encourage questions because questions breed an environment for learning and more learning means less ignorance
I agree with you fully, but people are different, some doesn't have your patience and willingness to educate, while some who ask don't have the social skills or respect towards the people who look a little out of the ordinary. I've seen people completely without understanding the time or place asking something extremely intimate or people who ask a very simple question get chewed out for even asking. It's good that people like you try to educate those who doesn't know or can't imagine what it's like to be even slightly different (like missing a single segment on a digit or even just have scars), because with more information and knowledge there's hopefully more understanding of the differences that bring challenges.
I think it's a combination of age and culture. The younger generation are far more tip toe around people, but in the process they lose the ability to really get to know and understand things they may not understand, which is the leading cause to hate; fearing things you don't understand. Some cultures are also far mor open or closed about things. While some celebrate just being an open book for the most part, others believe those parts of themselves should only be shared with those they like or care about. It's really a matter of trying to understand the other person's perspective and most of the time offense can be entirely avoided. I agree with your perspective about being open about things, but not everyone is willing or even capable because of life experiences.
That was my thinking as well. Depending on the phrasing, like perhaps asking first if the person minds you asking about the unexpected characteristic, then proceeding only if they've agreed it's okay with them, I feel like it shows you're interested in getting to know more about them. Sure, people are more than their body, but when a person displays a visibly different appearance than what is "normal", it's natural for others to be curious about it.
The true a$$hole in the cupcake story is the owner. It's the owners responsability to resolve conflicts the employees can't resolve themselves, even if it is "high school BS" P.S. those were very cute tea and coffe mugs 🥰
Indeed. And if its "high school bs", then fire the OG. Why are you letting someone who starts "high school bs" be on your payroll, if you're that adverse to it?
Re: Lady called "slim" - After all the proper steps (which she did), asking the other lady to stop, talking to manager, ect. I probably would have ignored the lady anytime she called me other than my actual name, and then acted (over-acted), confused. "What? Oh, I didn't know you were talking to me as that isn't my name. I only respond to [name]." But this tactic is VERY hard for a lot of people to pull off. It is like ignoring a ringing phone, we are social conditioned to respond to people talking to us.
The story about the missing fingers actually brought a amile. My dad lost his left hand in an explosion in 1969, adults rarely mentioned it. The smile was because little kids,figure4 years old up tt 8 or 10 would just stare. When he caught them looking he would stick the nub at them and say you see what happens when you pick your nose, got a wide eyed response almost every time. I also remember the first time I saw him in the hospitle he held it up still bandaged; and said not if you get out of line I got something to poke you in the eye. (:
As a 50yr old man who is 290lbs I spent years at a job where everyday I was insulted and put down because of my weight. One co-worker actually told me he thought it was his responability to "motivate" me to lose weight. It was totally wrong. And in most cases it is counter-productive because it causes some people to eat more. Just treat each other with respect.
Story 1, yes, Hailee, food will taste different for the cook than to everyone else because your sense of smell in particular adapts to the food scents and suppresses them, and since tasting food is like 80% smell, everything ends up tasting more bland.
The lady telling on the girl about the credit card could have been100% correct and the father might not have given his daughter permission to use it but she should have left it up to him to find out that she used it and punish her how he seen fit!! Life's lessons all the way around!!!
It always amazes me that people like "credit card lady" actually exist. She needs to go to school and take "Mind your own business 101". Slim lady might have handled it better, but I'll bet she wasn't called slim again. Mission accomplished. She asked not to be called that and her request wasn't respected. She shouldn't have had to mention it more than once.
I used to be 485 pounds and was called Shamu,Orca,quarterback.... and years later got surgery and became anorexic and went down to 90 pounds and started being called slim,skinny minnie... And it bothered me just the same!!!! Anyway you look at it it's body shaming and it hurts!!!
Maybe you might like the Malicious Compliance stories better, they normally are about people asking others to do stupid things and getting the consequences of those stupid things. It tends to be funny. Always like your videos.
You guys are both Super rational. And level/fair Minded. And I honestly agree with your answers. Kendra seems to have a way to boil it all down to the essence of the correct response
I've been called names both in a derogatory and non-derogatory way. The problem about the issue between the two coworkers was that you can't insist on giving anyone a nickname regarding their body the moment you meet them. Calling someone "slim" may or may not be rude, but the point is insisting on doing it just after you met. Once, during summer camp, I've been called "mozzarella" by a guy because I have a very pale skin. The guy who called me with this nickname was trying to be funny and over time I've realized that he really didn't mean to bully or harrass me, but this happened during a summer camp, with people I've just met so then I didn't take that as just a joke. Making fun of others is okay only as long as you know that that person won't get offended or feel hurt by your words.
Last story is a classic "treat others like you want to be treated" and "don't deal what you can't take". Judging by the reaction of "chunky", she obviously felt threatened by a slim person because of her own body insecurity; basically, she aggressively started calling her "slim" to preempt being called fat. Now of course that wouldn't have happened, but that's how scared human minds sometimes work.
I was the original 98 lb weakling when I was younger. Very short, and super skinny, and no matter what I ate, I couldn't gain weight to save my life. Then at 13, I exploded and put on height, muscle, and weight and unfortunately, never stopped putting on weight. So I went from one extreme to the other and got bullied for both until I learned to fight back with both my fists and. more importantly, my words. Turning a bully's ridicule back on them and making the crowd laugh at them hurts a lot more than a punch in the jaw.
3:50 - Regarding eating at a restaurant or cooking at home. Aside from everything they said, which was all valid, I particularly noticed his very last line: "I have a personal chef at home." Your partner is not YOUR "personal chef." That line alone is a major asshole line. Maybe / maybe not was that what he meant by saying that, but to say that at all requires a very serious self-reflection on how you view your partner. Is this a partnership? Or a servant? Even professional chefs like to eat other people's cooking sometimes! And she is not a professional chef, she is your girlfriend.
As for the lady who lost her fingers I think it’s disrespectful to ask these questions, I had a friend who was like that but I never asked her or treated her like she had an issue. She told later why she lost her fingers when she was comfortable enough to share that.
You can absolutely become a bit insensitive to the flavors of food you prepare if you're constantly taste testing it. It's not permanent, but a holiday weekend can be a bit blunted by it.
hey, little of topic but when are you going live next bc I really enjoy interacting with such lovely people. i don't expect it to be to soon I just don't want to miss it!
7:43 the building code in many parts of the US prevents people from having keyed locks on interior doors (aside from the type that can be opened from the outside with a coin or screwdriver) 8:22 i think it should be the ring and pinkie, i didn't see where they said 'the middle three'... afaik, the fingers are numbered 1-5 starting from the thumb = #1; so ring and pinkie would be #4 & #5
i am short; if someone calls me short(y) i cut that off with , "thanks, i'd never figured that out (pause) your power of observation is amazing. the no caps thing is still my personal preference and statement. (grin) smiling is a useful tool.
I LOVED that you did this...more insight to how amazing and beautiful and kind you BOTH are.. MORE PLEASEEEEEE. LOVE LOVE LOVE all of your videos. Happy Holidays to the both of you..May the coming year find the two of you all of the love and happiness you both deserve
Sorry, NTA for calling out the Boot Girl for potential fraud/theft. At 12:35 Boot Girl states " I have my dads credit card, I'm not paying". How did you get daddy's CC?. Did she STEAL it. At 13:39 Boot Girl "Uses her OWN card to buy the boots and leaves crying". Boot Girl had her own money (Allowance) to buy the boots, but was unwilling to spend it. Which equals basic THEFT. First: The store could have easily made a call or two, to her father, to confirm if Boot Girl was authorized to use the card. If not, that is THEFT, which means potential jail time. Second: The woman is NOT parenting someone else's child. She is watching out for the store itself and possible theft therein. Third: K/T, your argument's at 14:36 - 15:00, are while somewhat valid, holds no water at all in this situation. Fourth: A child is a young female/male under the age of 14 (IMO). Boot Girl sounds like she is a young Lady (15-18), based on where she is shopping and what she is buying. Fifth: at 15:15, yes another parent is allowed to interfere to prevent injuries. Side note: Love you Ladies and your love story. Sorry if this hurts someone's feelings.
@7:30--"Could have gone about it better" How so? If OP asked GF to knock, especially multiple times, mentioned the possibility of GF seeing everything multiple times, what is left? I see five options: 1: say something to the friend (assuming he has not already.) 2: Put a lock on the door (assuming the property owner will allow it.) 3: Shut up and cope (Bad Idea, guaranteed to build resentment and eventually destroy the friendship, not to mention that OP should NOT have to compromise their boundaries for the sake of "getting along.") 4: Move out and get a new place (Not feasible for a great many people these days) or 5: Exactly what he did. Have I missed anything? Anyone got any other options they can recommend in a situation like this?
The thing is thou, it's to each their own about disability or differences questions, I would honestly rather people ask to understand why I'm 26 and walk with a cane and obvious limp. I once had a elderly couple just assume I had a stroke or something. It made me feel self conscious. So no they're not the asshole it's just to each their own bc I always tell people I'd rather they ask than just assume and assume wrong.
Maybe the girlfriend wants to go out because she's the one who cooks, and, by the time she gets to eat the food, she's desensitized to the smell, and taste, of the food she cooks. If the guy learns to cook and does so on occasion, maybe the girlfriend would be less interested in going out to eat. I wouldn't call the guy an asshole for wanting to save money by staying in, but, he's kinda the asshole for not thinking about the fact that his girlfriend may not want to be the one who cooks all of the time.
HAILEE!!!!! @11:04 I am now wiping tea from my laptop screen from laughing so hard Kendra's reaction just added to my laughter I will say I have never had tea come out my nose after drinking I guess I should learn to expect the unexpected and not drink a cup of tea just in case of laughter for everyone wondering laptop is fine lmao
Story 1) There is truth to the "cook" not tasting the food the same. There is a clear evidence that being "around" during the making of food makes you a bit... desensitized to the flavour. Also I for one hate to "work" all the time at meals. I enjoy food a bit... but would never say foodie, but 100% don't make someone cook all the time, unless you are paying them to do so and even paid employees get time off. YTA. 2) buy a door knob that locks. they are like $20. heck by a "sliding lock" $5 3) yeah poor handling, but not A 4) yep TA. If she had said see knicked her father's card... more grey, but still not your job. 5) Both A. Poster less. Also the boss is.
After my cancer treatment I lost so much weight. Before cancer I was 155 to 160 lbs with cancer I was down to less than 112 in a matter of weeks. Luckily I had very supportive friends.
It's a fact, when you cook at home and you taste at certain points to make sure meal courses goes smoothly (dsnt mattr if it's guests or loved ones) that dulls the excitement. U pretty much know how it's turned out... I'm pulling out quote from Ratatouille "follow the recipe" Nd adding some "to the letter"........ Love you guys. Appreciate the content you make for the world
11:25 NTA As someone who has gone through the same situation (not the same reason) I use very obvious sarcasm as to make it hard for people to believe me while also getting it across that those questions are impolite
My eyes lit up when I saw this notification whille at work. I am fascinated with the AITA subreddit. 1. YTA. It sounds entitled that he expects his wife to be his personal chef and insulting that this guy expects every restaurant chef to meet the standards of his girlfriend's cooking. 2. NTA. I don't care if he is starkers. It's his room and she intruded without knocking. Get a lock or put a doorstop under the backside of your door since she wants to be difficult. The girlfriend and the her boyfriend the roommate are unquestionably TA. The girlfriend has no respect for OP's personal space. 3. NTA. They had enough of this nosy, tactless question. Don't ask people about injuries/deformities that people have. 4. YTA. Her dad might have been fine with spending that much on his credit card. If not, he will deal with it. We don't know. Let her father decide and figure it out. 5. NTA. Grey area, but her coworker started it, but she couldn't finish it. It's bodyshaming both ways, but everyone has a limit and the thin woman was pushed past her breaking point. Kendra has a point that the thin woman could have taken the high road, but it might have reached the point that the other woman no longer deserves it.
Slim story: NTA. "Objectification sucks. Period" sums it up perfectly. In this situation the coworker that continued using a reference to the author's physical appearance after being asked to stop repeatedly, and no leadership stepping in to resolve the workplace issue, left the author with no good options to handle the situation. Two wrongs don't make a right, however. If this wasn't approached from anger, I wonder if the author would have thought about not responding to her rude coworker until her preferred name was used. Citizen parenting: 100%, Grade A, A-Hole. No danger present, not her kid, not her business. Avoiding date night: Mixed. Reasonable not wanting to eat out all of the time. Not reasonable to expect GF to cook all the time. Definitely not cool to call GF their "... personal chef." If this person wants to maintain a relationship plan date nights. Even when married (speaking from personal experience.) Nude sleeper: debatable. NTA for wanting privacy in his own room. Should have gotten a lock for the door. Hell even try to find out why she doesn't like knocking. Communication could have disarmed the situation.
Although I don't think it's OK to objectify anyone, I don't think that last gal was an a-hole. She tried multiple times to get the other person to stop and they never did. She did what she needed to do. I'm an old fart, but believe that if you're going to dish it out, you better be able to take it.
This. Especially in an environment where she has no choice but to be around it. If outside help won't do anything that basically leaves quitting and finding a new job or retaliation as the only options. I also agree with Kendra about how the other girl is most likely projecting (I think it's Kendra that said it. Sorry I'm new here). Biggest thing I've learned is that bullies bully because they themselves are bullied whether it's classmates, family, coworkers or just any kind of peer in general. I was quick to anger as a kid and was constantly picked on and called names simply cause I existed it felt like all the way from kindergarten to 11th before I dropped out. Telling kids to leave me alone did nothing since everyone just saw me as the "spaz" and the schools never did anything about it except ask for names that I could never give as I never had a way to get there names. It got to the point where kids I'd never even seen or met before were calling me names or throwing stuff at me just because their friends asked or told them to. As dumb as it is I ended up with some severe anxiety issues because of it. And yes I tried my best to ignore it, but in a school of 3000 kids where it was happening every minute every day from at least 200 or more kids I didn't even know, it gets rather hard to ignore real quick.
Sorry for the long tangent all, but clearly that one hit hard for me. Probably helped myself a little by finally getting it out there in some way at least....
The slim story: everyone is the ahole… the overweight person was being rude, and refused to stop when asked, and the slim person overreacted… Unfortunately there’s not many solutions available in that situation… maybe talking to the other coworkers, and asking them to tell the person that it makes you uncomfortable? But that might cause even more harassment…
On the second story As a married man who has joint checking and credit accounts with my wife, the woman is absolutely the A-hole. Both my and her cards for both accounts, have my name on them as I’m the primary account holder. If someone refused to allow my wife to use them because of that, I would have their job that day.
The thing about cooking and it dulling your senses is a thing because I've made something(spaghetti with meat sauce) and everyone praised it and ate multiple helpings. Whereas i am trying to figure out what's missing. Eeird.
My grandfather was missing a middle finger. As a kid he told me he lost it while working on a car and the hood slammed on it. I honest to God believed him until literally very recently, decades after he passed away; because it seemed plausible enough, even if I didn't full understand how it would only catch one finger. It was only within the last couple of years when it came up, that my dad said he had lost it in a factory accident and then it occurred to me that when my grandfather told me that, he may have very likely been working on a car and I may have been holding onto the edge of the engine compartment; and said it to keep my fingers clear...
I’ve never been ID’d when I use my credit card. I just have to type in my PIN code (but not always). I honestly don’t see the problem tho in her using it. I mean she might’ve had permission to use it but even if she didn’t it’s not your problem. The Dad would’ve found out anyways and he would’ve handled it. It’s not your problem at all.
I guess it depends on what u buy tho. If u bought something like smokes then that’s when u would get ID’d I’m guessing (I’ve never bought anything like that). But just boots? I don’t see y someone would get ID’d for that.
That last one. I have very bad insecurities about my body. I was very skinny but after going to the gym for over 4 years and getting like muscle mass, people (family mostly) say I'm getting fatter. I have lost a lot of weight that I went from 275-130 in 2 years but after being told 'you're getting fat' and seeing I am in the 158-163 range has made me feel horrible about myself. I don't eat a lot anymore and if I do I'm very tired, I feel fat and depressed. I don't go to the gym as much anymore. My job I'm a driver and people say 'you'll get fatter, soft legs, soft stomach, round waist.' And I was just only doing legs nothing else. But when I tell them 'no just a myth. I do legs.' They look at me very questionably, to where I over eat, very depressed and want to lay around do nothing. Even when I was skinny I felt like it was just not a great compliment. My abs I feel like I get fat and don't look good anymore. I stopped a lot of work outs, stopped trails/walks/bike rides. It's like very bad insecurities, people (family/friends/people I see on a daily basis) all say 'Didn't you used to be a lot skinnier? You gained weight. You sure you workout? Yo need to eat more. You should eat lesser food if you want to loss the fat.' And it like hurts, makes me feel worst, that I should be just skin and dones, that no one wants me, people don't care about me and drives my depression even higher that I won't eat, feel sick. That girl who is 'skinny' she's not the ahole, she is just trying to have them stop and is a lot bravery, stronger then I am.
I have eczema scars on one of my arms and years ago I'd have random strangers ask me if I got burned. It's annoying, because you're a complete stranger. My usual response was "Is that what it looks like? It's a skin condition." And people would always feel bad about it. And then people started asking me if I was/am into shooting up. They don't look like track marks, at all. I'd always ignore them, but one guy would not let it go, and just kept asking. After I gave my usual response, he tried to rationalize why he was right because his brother uses needles and his arms look like mine. Luckily, no one does it anymore. It's not something that bothers me, since it's a part of me that I can't really change. (Although, a bionic arm would be pretty cool. Imagine the squeezing force if someone asks how I lost my arm!)
13:30 so, just saying, it's not NECESSARILY fraud. You can absolutely use somebody else's card if you have their permission. It opens the person giving permission up to a ton of risk... but doesn't make it fraud, per say. That's a common misconception, but trust me, ask your bank/card issuer about it if you don't believe me. It's called, I believe, authorized use or something along those lines. It gets really murky if you give your card to someone to, say, pick up dinner, and they stop off at best buy and buy a new computer with it first. In such a case, I believe generally you're SOL as the card owner, as you willingly gave the card to the other person. You could sue them for defrauding YOU, but you couldn't do a chargeback, at least not legally, since they had the card from you willingly (thus negating a fraud claim per the terms of your card with the bank, though like I said, you could still sue the person) That being said, the store can still refuse to process the transaction, and if the dad actually wanted the daughter to have a card for that purpose there's a simple way around the problem of ID not matching card: add her as an authorized user for the card. She would be issued a card in her name, no problems then. BUT, that isn't technically required to let her use your card. And it doesn't have to be a kid using a parent's card: if your friend gives you their card and asks you to pick up something from the store for them, that's legal, typically within the terms of the card agreement, and NOT fraud. As long as you have permission, you can absolutely use somebody else's card
I have been overweight my entire life. It’s taken years to not care if someone says something about my weight. No matter how much weight I loose I will still be bigger than most. I’m 5’9 and built more like my Dad. My mom and her side of the family are all smaller. My cousin can NOT gain weight. She has tried for years to gain weight. People used to tell her all the time she needed to go eat a cheeseburger. She got depressed and lost more weight. Some family members used to call her Beanpole and she tried to act like she didn’t care, but it used to hurt her feelings so bad. So let’s just not talk about anyone’s weight cause you don’t know what they’re going through mentally
Had a similar knocking situation once. I asked 3 times to please knock before coming in with no effect. the fourth time i layed in wait by the door and as it flew open i screamed at the top of my lunges "FUCKING KNOCK!" shoved her out and slammed the door. She has knocked ever since.
As a very overweight person, fuck "you can't fight fire with fire." If you come for me, best believe I'm coming for you. Turn about is 100% fair play. I make no allusions of having the higher moral ground. In the words of Captain Picard, "You may test that assumption at your convenience." And there's the rub, because people like this co-worker too often get away with their bullshit; because they assume you have dignity and moral fortitude that they don't, and that that will stop you from throwing back what they dish up. If the direct approach of asking them to stop doing this doesn't work - *_and_* it's only been barely a week and they've been doing it to such an extent to escalate it to this point - then they deserve the same treatment in-kind. If you have no respect for me, I have no respect for you; and will not lose sleep over it.
The smelling the food and it not tasting quite as good is real. It's nose blindness where you become desensitized to a smell because you are exposed to it a lot. A large portion of taste is smell, so if you are nose blind to a particular smell while cooking, then it won't taste as strong/good.
For "slim/chunky" I'd have said to the girl harassing her "I may be low on pounds, unlike you, but at least I'm not low on manners like you apparently are." and walked away and ignored anything else she said. Also not responded when she called you "Slim" and only respond to your name!
That last one got me deep. I have always been a skinny girl and my metabolism is through the roof i am also quite tall so people always tell me that im small and that I should eat , they also tend to call me weak and assume that I dont have the ability to lift heavy objects. This has always been a massive insecurity of mine and still is so I understand this girls frustration and get why she said what she said. But honestly never coment on anyones body you do not know what they have been through and it can seriously hurt someone.
As someone who has had CONSTANT comments my whole life on how skinny I am, I can say those comments can be extremely damaging, even if they are meant as a compliment. I went through a period where I thought certain family members would be disappointed in me if I got over a certain weight, and then another period where I thought others would be disappointed if I didn't gain weight. And getting comments such as "You're so skinny you're going to make someone a good wife someday" made me think the only part of me that was of value was my body. Because of this, I make it a point to NEVER comment on people's bodies, whether they are skinny or overweight.
Okay, for the last story, she should have gone full Count of Monte Cristo. Been falsely sent to prison for murder and escaped only to reinvent herself as a socialite and strip everything from her enemies only to fall in battle along with her enemies
In the story where the person is called slim: Everybody is an asshole, including other co-workers and the boss for not helping to stop it. Body shaming is body shaming, and OP and the co-worker did it. OP could have told them to stop in other ways than insulting them back.
I actually enjoyed the story from the person who made up different reasons for why she only had two fingers on one hand. In my early 20s I had a bad motorcycle accident and when I returned to school I had to wear an eyepatch because of oculomotor nerve palsy, i.e., my left eye wouldn't budge past the lower left and my pupil didn't react to light. A couple of friends asked why I had the eyepatch and I told them that my eye had popped out while my parents were driving me to the mountains for recuperation. It was a small school, so the story spread like wildfire. To the best of my knowledge, everyone thought it funny when the truth came out and I ended up dating one of the two people I first told the fabrication to. She was an amazing person.
“Chunky” is the asshole - her behavior is totally consistent with the power and control moves of a sociopath/narcissist, including her crying, blaming “slim” and playing the victim. Sometimes you do have to “fight fire with fire”, metaphorically. Narcissists count on the Kendras (empaths) in the world to make an excuses for them and coddle them when others call out their inappropriate behavior. Still, a better response on “Slims” part might have been to say: “Just because you’re jealous of my body, that doesn’t give you the right to call me names”.
As a person who carries a few (a lot) of extra pounds I would never comment on a persons weight. I have been big all my life and have had to suffer with fat jokes, I feel I have spent most of my life on 1 diet or another, and I learned that gaining weight for some people is as hard as loosing weight is for others and weather somebody is over or under weight it is not for you to judge or mock them. Asking a person once not to call you slim should have been enough. I can't believe her boss didn't step in and stop it straight away.
That lady with the credit card story like... "Uhm excuse me she's paying with money her dad gave her it's not hers shes not allowed to buy herself things with that money!" is what it comes down to like what the fuck even XD
"...Because I practically have a private chef" - That's the point. You don't. You have a girlfriend who happens to be really good at cooking. Sometimes a person just wants to relax and enjoy a meal. NTA but also needs to treat the girlfriend with a bit more empathy. Private chefs have a paycheck.
AITA?: I used to work at a retail store and sold appliances. One of the items that was sold there was a large chest freezer. I would often show this item to customers and seemingly every third person I would show it to would jokingly ask "So, how many dead bodies can I fit in here?" Now this was funny the first couple of times I heard it, but inevitably every joke gets old when you've heard it over and over again. And working retails sucks enough on its own without having to fake laugh at the same joke. So, eventually I decided to have some fun, and it came to pass that I was showing off the chest freezer again. The customer goes "So" and in my head I think "Here it comes," the customer continued "How many dead bodies can I fit in here," I replied "Are you planning on cutting them up or keeping the bodies whole?" The customer looked disgusted and said, "I was joking," and I replied, "So was I." The customer just left. In my head I'm thinking "YOU'RE THE ONE THAT STARTED THIS! WHY ARE YOU ANGRY?"
One of my roommates just refused to knock first and would just walk in whenever. It was driving me NUTS so I started locking my bedroom door after asking multiple times if he could knock. I tried to communicate my need for him to respect my space and he did not. So I found a way to enforce it. But then he tried getting mad at me for locking my bedroom door saying it was an excuse to ignore him. AITA?
I grew up being really thin (110 soaking wet). I was always so self-conscious about my weight because everyone kept telling me that I was bound to be overweight, like the rest of my family, that when my body changed and I went to 132 (which is healthy for my height and age), I hated it. When I would mention that I was gaining weight and out of shape, I would get "you're so thin don't even go there." It was also from the same people that said I was bound to gain weight. You never know what a person is facing behind any comment they make, so just don't be an asshole and just be compassionate.
As someone who was teased for being short (I'm 5'1) throughout my childhood I am of the opinion that this person did what I would've done in this situation. I had several different nicknames related to my height and I will remember them for the rest of my life. Nobody should judge anyone by their appearance, weight or height
I like the take that FootlessJo had in a video. If you're curious about what happened to a disabled person; first ask if it is okay to ask about what happened. If they say yes, awesome; if not, leave it be.
![Digital Circus Episode 4 [TRAILER]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/abZtsmMUbJo/mqdefault.jpg)
For the Slim story: the real AH is the adult who refused to step in and told her to deal with it themselves.
As a person who is "overweight" now but was constantly criticized for being "too skinny" by my own family constantly as a kid (I was a little "underweight" before puberty), being called skinny is not always a compliment. It can leave you with lifelong body dismorphia just as much as being called fat can.
This. I'm slightly overweight now but was super skinny when I was younger. I'm way more comfortable in my own skin now than I was. When I was pregnant I had HG(excessive vomiting) and the amount of cruel comments I got about my weight had me crying all the time.
Just don't comment on other people's bodies at all.
This is most definitely me. I hated being skinny as a child and young adult. I'm in my 30s now and I probably could lose a little weight but I'm happy the way I am.
"Slim" story: NTA. Body shaming is body shaming. If the co-worker can't take it, she shouldn't be dishing it out. She's lucky that OP didn't "accidentally" douse her with cupcake batter for the repeated harassment.
I absolutely agree
Period.
I agree. Being called skinny can be just as traumatic as being called chunky.
Also, manager has left the business open for a workplace lawsuit. If they are informed that someone is uncomfortable with their coworkers actions towards them, the complaining employee can sue for a hostile work environment because the manager refused to intervene.
@@Riftsrunner yes I used to get picked on for being so skinny but nobody knew it was because of my eating disorder
So “slim” was pretty controlled - could’ve chosen far more offensive words (fatso…etc.). If anyone should apologize it’s the person who initiated the body objectification commentary.
As a paraplegic, Kendra’s comments about appreciating your health floored me. Lots of people aren’t that self aware.
I'm 50 years old and my body is feeling the effects of a lot of physical labor (bad knees, a bad shoulder, permanent nerve damage in my dominant hand and so forth), I have more facial scars than Freddy Krueger(long story) and I can feel my body breaking down further almost daily.
You should always appreciate your *current* health, as things usually tends to go downhill 😁
As a person with a disability (I use a wheelchair) since birth I actually love questions. Nothing is too far for me, everyone is different I get that but I personally always encourage questions because questions breed an environment for learning and more learning means less ignorance
I agree with you fully, but people are different, some doesn't have your patience and willingness to educate, while some who ask don't have the social skills or respect towards the people who look a little out of the ordinary.
I've seen people completely without understanding the time or place asking something extremely intimate or people who ask a very simple question get chewed out for even asking.
It's good that people like you try to educate those who doesn't know or can't imagine what it's like to be even slightly different (like missing a single segment on a digit or even just have scars), because with more information and knowledge there's hopefully more understanding of the differences that bring challenges.
Same!
Also in a wheelchair and I agree 100%
I think it's a combination of age and culture. The younger generation are far more tip toe around people, but in the process they lose the ability to really get to know and understand things they may not understand, which is the leading cause to hate; fearing things you don't understand. Some cultures are also far mor open or closed about things. While some celebrate just being an open book for the most part, others believe those parts of themselves should only be shared with those they like or care about. It's really a matter of trying to understand the other person's perspective and most of the time offense can be entirely avoided.
I agree with your perspective about being open about things, but not everyone is willing or even capable because of life experiences.
That was my thinking as well. Depending on the phrasing, like perhaps asking first if the person minds you asking about the unexpected characteristic, then proceeding only if they've agreed it's okay with them, I feel like it shows you're interested in getting to know more about them. Sure, people are more than their body, but when a person displays a visibly different appearance than what is "normal", it's natural for others to be curious about it.
Since they got KallmeKris on an episode, Smosh NEEDS to bring Hailee and Kendra for a Reddit episode!!!
Hey
Hey
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
This would be so cool
Agreed
The true a$$hole in the cupcake story is the owner. It's the owners responsability to resolve conflicts the employees can't resolve themselves, even if it is "high school BS"
P.S. those were very cute tea and coffe mugs 🥰
Indeed. And if its "high school bs", then fire the OG. Why are you letting someone who starts "high school bs" be on your payroll, if you're that adverse to it?
Re: Lady called "slim" - After all the proper steps (which she did), asking the other lady to stop, talking to manager, ect. I probably would have ignored the lady anytime she called me other than my actual name, and then acted (over-acted), confused. "What? Oh, I didn't know you were talking to me as that isn't my name. I only respond to [name]." But this tactic is VERY hard for a lot of people to pull off. It is like ignoring a ringing phone, we are social conditioned to respond to people talking to us.
The story about the missing fingers actually brought a amile. My dad lost his left hand in an explosion in 1969, adults rarely mentioned it. The smile was because little kids,figure4 years old up tt 8 or 10 would just stare. When he caught them looking he would stick the nub at them and say you see what happens when you pick your nose, got a wide eyed response almost every time. I also remember the first time I saw him in the hospitle he held it up still bandaged; and said not if you get out of line I got something to poke you in the eye. (:
As a 50yr old man who is 290lbs I spent years at a job where everyday I was insulted and put down because of my weight. One co-worker actually told me he thought it was his responability to "motivate" me to lose weight. It was totally wrong. And in most cases it is counter-productive because it causes some people to eat more. Just treat each other with respect.
Story 1, yes, Hailee, food will taste different for the cook than to everyone else because your sense of smell in particular adapts to the food scents and suppresses them, and since tasting food is like 80% smell, everything ends up tasting more bland.
Pretty much agree with you guys. Basically, either be kind or mind your own business. When someone won't stop attacking, you have to defend.
Thanks for all the cute and refreshing content, videos, shorts and all the rest you do.
Wishing you both the best.
Thank you so much for the support 🌹
@@HaileeandKendraNo, thank you! :) for soo many smiles from your videos.
The lady telling on the girl about the credit card could have been100% correct and the father might not have given his daughter permission to use it but she should have left it up to him to find out that she used it and punish her how he seen fit!! Life's lessons all the way around!!!
Awww I think it's sweet how much you two love each other. 😍❤️.
Also I couldn't stop laughing at Hailee's face @1:22 after Kendra kissed her. 😂😂😂
It always amazes me that people like "credit card lady" actually exist. She needs to go to school and take "Mind your own business 101".
Slim lady might have handled it better, but I'll bet she wasn't called slim again. Mission accomplished. She asked not to be called that and her request wasn't respected. She shouldn't have had to mention it more than once.
I used to be 485 pounds and was called Shamu,Orca,quarterback.... and years later got surgery and became anorexic and went down to 90 pounds and started being called slim,skinny minnie... And it bothered me just the same!!!! Anyway you look at it it's body shaming and it hurts!!!
Maybe you might like the Malicious Compliance stories better, they normally are about people asking others to do stupid things and getting the consequences of those stupid things. It tends to be funny. Always like your videos.
Yes!
This was brilliant!
The differences in insights and opinions are so interesting, please continue making these!
Hey
You guys are both Super rational. And level/fair Minded. And I honestly agree with your answers. Kendra seems to have a way to boil it all down to the essence of the correct response
I've been called names both in a derogatory and non-derogatory way. The problem about the issue between the two coworkers was that you can't insist on giving anyone a nickname regarding their body the moment you meet them. Calling someone "slim" may or may not be rude, but the point is insisting on doing it just after you met. Once, during summer camp, I've been called "mozzarella" by a guy because I have a very pale skin. The guy who called me with this nickname was trying to be funny and over time I've realized that he really didn't mean to bully or harrass me, but this happened during a summer camp, with people I've just met so then I didn't take that as just a joke. Making fun of others is okay only as long as you know that that person won't get offended or feel hurt by your words.
Last story is a classic "treat others like you want to be treated" and "don't deal what you can't take".
Judging by the reaction of "chunky", she obviously felt threatened by a slim person because of her own body insecurity; basically, she aggressively started calling her "slim" to preempt being called fat. Now of course that wouldn't have happened, but that's how scared human minds sometimes work.
Love the video you guys! Keep up the great content. Always be yourself no matter what other people think about you.
We need more of these! I love it! Also unrelated, Hailey you are sooooooo pretty
Im a big guy and i say commenting on someone's weight is never ok no matter the size. Especially if someone straight out tells you to stop
"Because I have opinions, and I'm im going to share them" YASSSSSSS!!!! Barely into the video and Kendra's already cracking me up
I was the original 98 lb weakling when I was younger. Very short, and super skinny, and no matter what I ate, I couldn't gain weight to save my life. Then at 13, I exploded and put on height, muscle, and weight and unfortunately, never stopped putting on weight. So I went from one extreme to the other and got bullied for both until I learned to fight back with both my fists and. more importantly, my words. Turning a bully's ridicule back on them and making the crowd laugh at them hurts a lot more than a punch in the jaw.
3:50 - Regarding eating at a restaurant or cooking at home. Aside from everything they said, which was all valid, I particularly noticed his very last line: "I have a personal chef at home." Your partner is not YOUR "personal chef." That line alone is a major asshole line. Maybe / maybe not was that what he meant by saying that, but to say that at all requires a very serious self-reflection on how you view your partner. Is this a partnership? Or a servant? Even professional chefs like to eat other people's cooking sometimes! And she is not a professional chef, she is your girlfriend.
As for the lady who lost her fingers I think it’s disrespectful to ask these questions, I had a friend who was like that but I never asked her or treated her like she had an issue. She told later why she lost her fingers when she was comfortable enough to share that.
You can absolutely become a bit insensitive to the flavors of food you prepare if you're constantly taste testing it. It's not permanent, but a holiday weekend can be a bit blunted by it.
11:04 Kendra's reaction 😂
hey, little of topic but when are you going live next bc I really enjoy interacting with such lovely people. i don't expect it to be to soon I just don't want to miss it!
Make this a series, I loved this 😅
7:43 the building code in many parts of the US prevents people from having keyed locks on interior doors (aside from the type that can be opened from the outside with a coin or screwdriver)
8:22 i think it should be the ring and pinkie, i didn't see where they said 'the middle three'... afaik, the fingers are numbered 1-5 starting from the thumb = #1; so ring and pinkie would be #4 & #5
i am short; if someone calls me short(y) i cut that off with , "thanks, i'd never figured that out (pause) your power of observation is amazing. the no caps thing is still my personal preference and statement. (grin) smiling is a useful tool.
You girls are not the assholes! I loves ya both! hugs to you and all on your channel !
omg i love AITA i read it everyday glad you guys covered it thanks 🤗
I LOVED that you did this...more insight to how amazing and beautiful and kind you BOTH are.. MORE PLEASEEEEEE. LOVE LOVE LOVE all of your videos. Happy Holidays to the both of you..May the coming year find the two of you all of the love and happiness you both deserve
Sorry, NTA for calling out the Boot Girl for potential fraud/theft.
At 12:35 Boot Girl states " I have my dads credit card, I'm not paying". How did you get daddy's CC?. Did she STEAL it.
At 13:39 Boot Girl "Uses her OWN card to buy the boots and leaves crying". Boot Girl had her own money (Allowance) to buy the boots, but was unwilling to spend it. Which equals basic THEFT.
First: The store could have easily made a call or two, to her father, to confirm if Boot Girl was authorized to use the card. If not, that is THEFT, which means potential jail time.
Second: The woman is NOT parenting someone else's child. She is watching out for the store itself and possible theft therein.
Third: K/T, your argument's at 14:36 - 15:00, are while somewhat valid, holds no water at all in this situation.
Fourth: A child is a young female/male under the age of 14 (IMO). Boot Girl sounds like she is a young Lady (15-18), based on where she is shopping and what she is buying.
Fifth: at 15:15, yes another parent is allowed to interfere to prevent injuries.
Side note: Love you Ladies and your love story. Sorry if this hurts someone's feelings.
Nah. Mind your own damn business.
Not your family = not your business
Not your store = not your business
Your pregnancy analogy reminds me of a post saying that "we're trying for a baby" is the same as saying "we're rawdogging on a regular basis."
@7:30--"Could have gone about it better" How so? If OP asked GF to knock, especially multiple times, mentioned the possibility of GF seeing everything multiple times, what is left? I see five options: 1: say something to the friend (assuming he has not already.) 2: Put a lock on the door (assuming the property owner will allow it.) 3: Shut up and cope (Bad Idea, guaranteed to build resentment and eventually destroy the friendship, not to mention that OP should NOT have to compromise their boundaries for the sake of "getting along.") 4: Move out and get a new place (Not feasible for a great many people these days) or 5: Exactly what he did.
Have I missed anything? Anyone got any other options they can recommend in a situation like this?
The thing is thou, it's to each their own about disability or differences questions, I would honestly rather people ask to understand why I'm 26 and walk with a cane and obvious limp. I once had a elderly couple just assume I had a stroke or something. It made me feel self conscious. So no they're not the asshole it's just to each their own bc I always tell people I'd rather they ask than just assume and assume wrong.
Hailee, Kendra, you need to do a podcast. I loved this video!!! I'd listen to you talk about things for hours ❤
KMK podcast would be awesome
Maybe the girlfriend wants to go out because she's the one who cooks, and, by the time she gets to eat the food, she's desensitized to the smell, and taste, of the food she cooks. If the guy learns to cook and does so on occasion, maybe the girlfriend would be less interested in going out to eat. I wouldn't call the guy an asshole for wanting to save money by staying in, but, he's kinda the asshole for not thinking about the fact that his girlfriend may not want to be the one who cooks all of the time.
HAILEE!!!!! @11:04 I am now wiping tea from my laptop screen from laughing so hard Kendra's reaction just added to my laughter I will say I have never had tea come out my nose after drinking I guess I should learn to expect the unexpected and not drink a cup of tea just in case of laughter for everyone wondering laptop is fine lmao
Really enjoyed this video have a amazing weekend love u both ❤
I've been binge watching all of your videos on RUclips because I can't just get enough of yall from tiktok😂 I love you both
Hey
thought I would say HI today instead of my usual 🥰🥰 comment & also to thank you for all the videos 🥰🥰
Hello!! 👋 and thank you so much for watching our content! 😁
My favorite couple on RUclips. Luv you Guys ❤❤❤❤❤
Story 1) There is truth to the "cook" not tasting the food the same. There is a clear evidence that being "around" during the making of food makes you a bit... desensitized to the flavour. Also I for one hate to "work" all the time at meals. I enjoy food a bit... but would never say foodie, but 100% don't make someone cook all the time, unless you are paying them to do so and even paid employees get time off. YTA.
2) buy a door knob that locks. they are like $20. heck by a "sliding lock" $5
3) yeah poor handling, but not A
4) yep TA. If she had said see knicked her father's card... more grey, but still not your job.
5) Both A. Poster less. Also the boss is.
After my cancer treatment I lost so much weight. Before cancer I was 155 to 160 lbs with cancer I was down to less than 112 in a matter of weeks. Luckily I had very supportive friends.
It's a fact, when you cook at home and you taste at certain points to make sure meal courses goes smoothly (dsnt mattr if it's guests or loved ones) that dulls the excitement. U pretty much know how it's turned out... I'm pulling out quote from Ratatouille "follow the recipe" Nd adding some "to the letter"........ Love you guys. Appreciate the content you make for the world
Woot, this is awesome love you gals
Love aita videos!!! Yes they can make u angry, but they’re also entertaining imo. Hope u two do more! 🙏❤️
11:25 NTA As someone who has gone through the same situation (not the same reason) I use very obvious sarcasm as to make it hard for people to believe me while also getting it across that those questions are impolite
There are to many people in this world that feel they need to get in to other people's business
love your videos :)
The girl with missing fingers is an absolute legend.
You two were 100% right.
Nope. She got told to stop and carried on. Don't comment on anyones weight. You're not the a-hole
You guys are not annoying. You guys are funny you’re funnier.
My eyes lit up when I saw this notification whille at work. I am fascinated with the AITA subreddit.
1. YTA. It sounds entitled that he expects his wife to be his personal chef and insulting that this guy expects every restaurant chef to meet the standards of his girlfriend's cooking.
2. NTA. I don't care if he is starkers. It's his room and she intruded without knocking. Get a lock or put a doorstop under the backside of your door since she wants to be difficult. The girlfriend and the her boyfriend the roommate are unquestionably TA. The girlfriend has no respect for OP's personal space.
3. NTA. They had enough of this nosy, tactless question. Don't ask people about injuries/deformities that people have.
4. YTA. Her dad might have been fine with spending that much on his credit card. If not, he will deal with it. We don't know. Let her father decide and figure it out.
5. NTA. Grey area, but her coworker started it, but she couldn't finish it. It's bodyshaming both ways, but everyone has a limit and the thin woman was pushed past her breaking point. Kendra has a point that the thin woman could have taken the high road, but it might have reached the point that the other woman no longer deserves it.
OMG. 😂 This just happened while watching this video- “… baby gravy the turkey baster” COMMERCIAL. 🤣 Wait, WHAT?!? 🤣
Slim story: NTA. "Objectification sucks. Period" sums it up perfectly. In this situation the coworker that continued using a reference to the author's physical appearance after being asked to stop repeatedly, and no leadership stepping in to resolve the workplace issue, left the author with no good options to handle the situation. Two wrongs don't make a right, however. If this wasn't approached from anger, I wonder if the author would have thought about not responding to her rude coworker until her preferred name was used.
Citizen parenting: 100%, Grade A, A-Hole. No danger present, not her kid, not her business.
Avoiding date night: Mixed. Reasonable not wanting to eat out all of the time. Not reasonable to expect GF to cook all the time. Definitely not cool to call GF their "... personal chef." If this person wants to maintain a relationship plan date nights. Even when married (speaking from personal experience.)
Nude sleeper: debatable. NTA for wanting privacy in his own room. Should have gotten a lock for the door. Hell even try to find out why she doesn't like knocking. Communication could have disarmed the situation.
Although I don't think it's OK to objectify anyone, I don't think that last gal was an a-hole. She tried multiple times to get the other person to stop and they never did. She did what she needed to do. I'm an old fart, but believe that if you're going to dish it out, you better be able to take it.
This. Especially in an environment where she has no choice but to be around it. If outside help won't do anything that basically leaves quitting and finding a new job or retaliation as the only options. I also agree with Kendra about how the other girl is most likely projecting (I think it's Kendra that said it. Sorry I'm new here). Biggest thing I've learned is that bullies bully because they themselves are bullied whether it's classmates, family, coworkers or just any kind of peer in general. I was quick to anger as a kid and was constantly picked on and called names simply cause I existed it felt like all the way from kindergarten to 11th before I dropped out. Telling kids to leave me alone did nothing since everyone just saw me as the "spaz" and the schools never did anything about it except ask for names that I could never give as I never had a way to get there names. It got to the point where kids I'd never even seen or met before were calling me names or throwing stuff at me just because their friends asked or told them to. As dumb as it is I ended up with some severe anxiety issues because of it. And yes I tried my best to ignore it, but in a school of 3000 kids where it was happening every minute every day from at least 200 or more kids I didn't even know, it gets rather hard to ignore real quick.
Sorry for the long tangent all, but clearly that one hit hard for me. Probably helped myself a little by finally getting it out there in some way at least....
good, you clarified on the parenting thing. there are plenty of reasons to step in and protect a child from unfit parents.
Hailee is always beautiful, but in this video, she is so gorgeous!! I think green really suits you well!
The slim story: everyone is the ahole… the overweight person was being rude, and refused to stop when asked, and the slim person overreacted…
Unfortunately there’s not many solutions available in that situation… maybe talking to the other coworkers, and asking them to tell the person that it makes you uncomfortable? But that might cause even more harassment…
I love these videos you should do more
On the second story
As a married man who has joint checking and credit accounts with my wife, the woman is absolutely the A-hole. Both my and her cards for both accounts, have my name on them as I’m the primary account holder. If someone refused to allow my wife to use them because of that, I would have their job that day.
The thing about cooking and it dulling your senses is a thing because I've made something(spaghetti with meat sauce) and everyone praised it and ate multiple helpings. Whereas i am trying to figure out what's missing. Eeird.
Love you Kendra and Hailee ❤
My grandfather was missing a middle finger. As a kid he told me he lost it while working on a car and the hood slammed on it. I honest to God believed him until literally very recently, decades after he passed away; because it seemed plausible enough, even if I didn't full understand how it would only catch one finger. It was only within the last couple of years when it came up, that my dad said he had lost it in a factory accident and then it occurred to me that when my grandfather told me that, he may have very likely been working on a car and I may have been holding onto the edge of the engine compartment; and said it to keep my fingers clear...
"no i dont want fucking coffee" 😂😂
Cashier should have ID'd the person for the purchase. It's on the business to take the liability or charge-back.
I’ve never been ID’d when I use my credit card. I just have to type in my PIN code (but not always). I honestly don’t see the problem tho in her using it. I mean she might’ve had permission to use it but even if she didn’t it’s not your problem. The Dad would’ve found out anyways and he would’ve handled it. It’s not your problem at all.
I guess it depends on what u buy tho. If u bought something like smokes then that’s when u would get ID’d I’m guessing (I’ve never bought anything like that). But just boots? I don’t see y someone would get ID’d for that.
That last one. I have very bad insecurities about my body. I was very skinny but after going to the gym for over 4 years and getting like muscle mass, people (family mostly) say I'm getting fatter. I have lost a lot of weight that I went from 275-130 in 2 years but after being told 'you're getting fat' and seeing I am in the 158-163 range has made me feel horrible about myself. I don't eat a lot anymore and if I do I'm very tired, I feel fat and depressed. I don't go to the gym as much anymore. My job I'm a driver and people say 'you'll get fatter, soft legs, soft stomach, round waist.' And I was just only doing legs nothing else. But when I tell them 'no just a myth. I do legs.' They look at me very questionably, to where I over eat, very depressed and want to lay around do nothing. Even when I was skinny I felt like it was just not a great compliment. My abs I feel like I get fat and don't look good anymore. I stopped a lot of work outs, stopped trails/walks/bike rides. It's like very bad insecurities, people (family/friends/people I see on a daily basis) all say 'Didn't you used to be a lot skinnier? You gained weight. You sure you workout? Yo need to eat more. You should eat lesser food if you want to loss the fat.' And it like hurts, makes me feel worst, that I should be just skin and dones, that no one wants me, people don't care about me and drives my depression even higher that I won't eat, feel sick. That girl who is 'skinny' she's not the ahole, she is just trying to have them stop and is a lot bravery, stronger then I am.
I have eczema scars on one of my arms and years ago I'd have random strangers ask me if I got burned. It's annoying, because you're a complete stranger. My usual response was "Is that what it looks like? It's a skin condition." And people would always feel bad about it. And then people started asking me if I was/am into shooting up. They don't look like track marks, at all. I'd always ignore them, but one guy would not let it go, and just kept asking. After I gave my usual response, he tried to rationalize why he was right because his brother uses needles and his arms look like mine. Luckily, no one does it anymore. It's not something that bothers me, since it's a part of me that I can't really change. (Although, a bionic arm would be pretty cool. Imagine the squeezing force if someone asks how I lost my arm!)
The woman at the department store sounds jealous and exhausting
13:30 so, just saying, it's not NECESSARILY fraud. You can absolutely use somebody else's card if you have their permission. It opens the person giving permission up to a ton of risk... but doesn't make it fraud, per say. That's a common misconception, but trust me, ask your bank/card issuer about it if you don't believe me. It's called, I believe, authorized use or something along those lines. It gets really murky if you give your card to someone to, say, pick up dinner, and they stop off at best buy and buy a new computer with it first. In such a case, I believe generally you're SOL as the card owner, as you willingly gave the card to the other person. You could sue them for defrauding YOU, but you couldn't do a chargeback, at least not legally, since they had the card from you willingly (thus negating a fraud claim per the terms of your card with the bank, though like I said, you could still sue the person)
That being said, the store can still refuse to process the transaction, and if the dad actually wanted the daughter to have a card for that purpose there's a simple way around the problem of ID not matching card: add her as an authorized user for the card. She would be issued a card in her name, no problems then.
BUT, that isn't technically required to let her use your card. And it doesn't have to be a kid using a parent's card: if your friend gives you their card and asks you to pick up something from the store for them, that's legal, typically within the terms of the card agreement, and NOT fraud. As long as you have permission, you can absolutely use somebody else's card
I have been overweight my entire life. It’s taken years to not care if someone says something about my weight. No matter how much weight I loose I will still be bigger than most. I’m 5’9 and built more like my Dad. My mom and her side of the family are all smaller. My cousin can NOT gain weight. She has tried for years to gain weight. People used to tell her all the time she needed to go eat a cheeseburger. She got depressed and lost more weight. Some family members used to call her Beanpole and she tried to act like she didn’t care, but it used to hurt her feelings so bad. So let’s just not talk about anyone’s weight cause you don’t know what they’re going through mentally
Had a similar knocking situation once. I asked 3 times to please knock before coming in with no effect. the fourth time i layed in wait by the door and as it flew open i screamed at the top of my lunges "FUCKING KNOCK!" shoved her out and slammed the door. She has knocked ever since.
As a very overweight person, fuck "you can't fight fire with fire." If you come for me, best believe I'm coming for you. Turn about is 100% fair play. I make no allusions of having the higher moral ground. In the words of Captain Picard, "You may test that assumption at your convenience."
And there's the rub, because people like this co-worker too often get away with their bullshit; because they assume you have dignity and moral fortitude that they don't, and that that will stop you from throwing back what they dish up. If the direct approach of asking them to stop doing this doesn't work - *_and_* it's only been barely a week and they've been doing it to such an extent to escalate it to this point - then they deserve the same treatment in-kind. If you have no respect for me, I have no respect for you; and will not lose sleep over it.
The smelling the food and it not tasting quite as good is real. It's nose blindness where you become desensitized to a smell because you are exposed to it a lot. A large portion of taste is smell, so if you are nose blind to a particular smell while cooking, then it won't taste as strong/good.
For "slim/chunky" I'd have said to the girl harassing her "I may be low on pounds, unlike you, but at least I'm not low on manners like you apparently are." and walked away and ignored anything else she said. Also not responded when she called you "Slim" and only respond to your name!
"Apparently manners and weight don't stay in same body" 😁
Merry Christmas happy holidays 💚💚❤️🎅🏻❄️
That last one got me deep. I have always been a skinny girl and my metabolism is through the roof i am also quite tall so people always tell me that im small and that I should eat , they also tend to call me weak and assume that I dont have the ability to lift heavy objects. This has always been a massive insecurity of mine and still is so I understand this girls frustration and get why she said what she said. But honestly never coment on anyones body you do not know what they have been through and it can seriously hurt someone.
As someone who has had CONSTANT comments my whole life on how skinny I am, I can say those comments can be extremely damaging, even if they are meant as a compliment. I went through a period where I thought certain family members would be disappointed in me if I got over a certain weight, and then another period where I thought others would be disappointed if I didn't gain weight. And getting comments such as "You're so skinny you're going to make someone a good wife someday" made me think the only part of me that was of value was my body. Because of this, I make it a point to NEVER comment on people's bodies, whether they are skinny or overweight.
Okay, for the last story, she should have gone full Count of Monte Cristo. Been falsely sent to prison for murder and escaped only to reinvent herself as a socialite and strip everything from her enemies only to fall in battle along with her enemies
In the story where the person is called slim: Everybody is an asshole, including other co-workers and the boss for not helping to stop it. Body shaming is body shaming, and OP and the co-worker did it. OP could have told them to stop in other ways than insulting them back.
I actually enjoyed the story from the person who made up different reasons for why she only had two fingers on one hand. In my early 20s I had a bad motorcycle accident and when I returned to school I had to wear an eyepatch because of oculomotor nerve palsy, i.e., my left eye wouldn't budge past the lower left and my pupil didn't react to light. A couple of friends asked why I had the eyepatch and I told them that my eye had popped out while my parents were driving me to the mountains for recuperation. It was a small school, so the story spread like wildfire. To the best of my knowledge, everyone thought it funny when the truth came out and I ended up dating one of the two people I first told the fabrication to. She was an amazing person.
“Chunky” is the asshole - her behavior is totally consistent with the power and control moves of a sociopath/narcissist, including her crying, blaming “slim” and playing the victim. Sometimes you do have to “fight fire with fire”, metaphorically.
Narcissists count on the Kendras (empaths) in the world to make an excuses for them and coddle them when others call out their inappropriate behavior.
Still, a better response on “Slims” part might have been to say: “Just because you’re jealous of my body, that doesn’t give you the right to call me names”.
As a person who carries a few (a lot) of extra pounds I would never comment on a persons weight. I have been big all my life and have had to suffer with fat jokes, I feel I have spent most of my life on 1 diet or another, and I learned that gaining weight for some people is as hard as loosing weight is for others and weather somebody is over or under weight it is not for you to judge or mock them. Asking a person once not to call you slim should have been enough. I can't believe her boss didn't step in and stop it straight away.
That lady with the credit card story like... "Uhm excuse me she's paying with money her dad gave her it's not hers shes not allowed to buy herself things with that money!" is what it comes down to like what the fuck even XD
"...Because I practically have a private chef" - That's the point. You don't. You have a girlfriend who happens to be really good at cooking. Sometimes a person just wants to relax and enjoy a meal. NTA but also needs to treat the girlfriend with a bit more empathy. Private chefs have a paycheck.
AITA?:
I used to work at a retail store and sold appliances. One of the items that was sold there was a large chest freezer. I would often show this item to customers and seemingly every third person I would show it to would jokingly ask "So, how many dead bodies can I fit in here?"
Now this was funny the first couple of times I heard it, but inevitably every joke gets old when you've heard it over and over again. And working retails sucks enough on its own without having to fake laugh at the same joke. So, eventually I decided to have some fun, and it came to pass that I was showing off the chest freezer again. The customer goes "So" and in my head I think "Here it comes," the customer continued "How many dead bodies can I fit in here," I replied "Are you planning on cutting them up or keeping the bodies whole?"
The customer looked disgusted and said, "I was joking," and I replied, "So was I." The customer just left. In my head I'm thinking "YOU'RE THE ONE THAT STARTED THIS! WHY ARE YOU ANGRY?"
One of my roommates just refused to knock first and would just walk in whenever. It was driving me NUTS so I started locking my bedroom door after asking multiple times if he could knock. I tried to communicate my need for him to respect my space and he did not. So I found a way to enforce it. But then he tried getting mad at me for locking my bedroom door saying it was an excuse to ignore him. AITA?
I grew up being really thin (110 soaking wet). I was always so self-conscious about my weight because everyone kept telling me that I was bound to be overweight, like the rest of my family, that when my body changed and I went to 132 (which is healthy for my height and age), I hated it. When I would mention that I was gaining weight and out of shape, I would get "you're so thin don't even go there." It was also from the same people that said I was bound to gain weight.
You never know what a person is facing behind any comment they make, so just don't be an asshole and just be compassionate.
As someone who was teased for being short (I'm 5'1) throughout my childhood I am of the opinion that this person did what I would've done in this situation. I had several different nicknames related to my height and I will remember them for the rest of my life. Nobody should judge anyone by their appearance, weight or height
About the skinny shaming story: Body shaming is body shaming, full stop.
I like the take that FootlessJo had in a video. If you're curious about what happened to a disabled person; first ask if it is okay to ask about what happened. If they say yes, awesome; if not, leave it be.