Both, I heard Japanese men for some weird reason tend to have sex with prositute than his wife, Since the wife is not getting it from her husband so she had an affair.
I think the difference is pretty much irrelevant. Some people, men and women, like to point the finger at the other gender to claim that they suck more because they cheat more. Truth is, both genders cheat a lot, because there are shitty people born male and shitty people born female.
Fee-males have always cheated more, proof? Out of 100% of men, only the top 20% or less will cheat, why? Because they can. The 80 to 40% rarely cheat(they're lucky they have 1 fee-male), and the bottom 40% won't, because no fee-male will touch them. The top 80% of fee-males can get "it", anytime they want it from any guy, and most do. The bottom 20% become hard core lefty g!rl power lez-fasc!sts. And having there be many more fee-males on earth than men, it's easy to see why the average fee-male, is a garden tool.
Nobita, you've become such a serious cultural sociologist for Japan, I really appreciate your efforts and insights into the often not discussed aspects of Japanese society.
Naw not fooled by this Nobita guy, each video hes trying to dissuade foreigners from thinking about pursuing Japanese girls, I see you Nobita, but Im still taking your girls over there, Japanese girls are the hottest and the best in everyway
@@funkthat Totally disagree with your assessment of Nobita. He's discussing challenging topics in a way that is rarely discussed. He didn't say all Japanese women are cheaters. He's only investigating the cultural and societal reasons that it happens.
He is NOT using any valid source though. And his videos are very manipulative. I'm Japanese and googled this cheating matter in Japanese. All the top websites say men cheat more, and also the cheating rate is between 20% and 40% depending on the website. I don't know where he is finding the info but it's more like the case that he wants to believe what he wants to believe. He shouldn't use the result of the questionnaire from a minor female magazine (he shows it's from "Marisol" in the video, and the magazine is not known at all), especially when this information could be easily manipulated. In a famous female magazine "Oggi" website, they say they surveyed a total of 800 men and women and showed man's cheating rate was 22% and women's cheating rate was 18% respectively. So how trustworthy is Nobita's information? Female magazines NEVER are valid sources. Seriously though, I don't know if he ever learned the concept of media literacy but if you cited information for a paper in the way he does, it would be rejected at university as it's not using a valid resource. I find his opinions very dogmatic. Please take it with a grain of salt.
So basically couples need to be more intimate in relationships whether it be emotionally, sexually, or just physically to make it work, this is the same anywhere and I hope Japan fixes this.
I agree with every point, except wanna add - it's not up to JAPAN to fix it, but up to the JAPANESE themselves to make decisions that would fix it! ;) People need to take these matters into their own hands and not wait for "miracles".
"the lower self-worth se has, the more likely she is to cheat" ... damn that resumes pretty well my first experience, constantly trying to help her see how pretty she was and got cheated on, great...
I've always wondered how people end up being married when they can't communicate properly. Marriage is such a serious thing, why would you marry someone if you can't even talk to them about what you like in bed, or what is making you unhappy etc? It's like some people marry because society expects them to marry, and then they don't know how to deal with the hurdles that naturally come with relationships. Thanks for the video as usual, Nobita!
they're following the norms which is getting married before 30s, I believe it's 25 that's it's ideal to get married for them?(not sure) Most of their ideals are also looking for something physical qualities and basic characteristics.. but in the end things didn't works out.
"It's like some people marry because society expects them to marry, and then they don't know how to deal with the hurdles that naturally come with relationships." Bingo.
Because in a conservitive society, marriage is more about image and respectability. Rather than an emotional commitment, and that leads to people being pressured into commitments they don't really want, or that don't line up with all thier values. They feel that if they don't fit into the mold they will be an outcast. So they do what they have to do what they have to for image sake and just do what they really want discreetly. And that becomes the norm. It's no way to live.
If you don't mind me asking, what do you mean with "degenerate" in this case? I was under the impression that Japanese society has dating rules that would be considered more conservative in the West, since casual sex isn't as common there as it is here AFAIK, and you usually have to officially date someone to have sex with them. But I might be entirely wrong, of course, lol
@@LeoVital casual sex is extremely common. I’m living near kabukicho now and walking there at night makes me feel like a doomer. Seeing young girls in dresses with signs around their neck etc or the panty vending machines. Yeah, it’s a small part of Japan, but it’s still a large industry Complete degeneracy
I'm afraid i have to disagree, cause there still many dumbass weaboo sayin' hook me to a japanese girls, they not learn anything about this topic yet, it's so irritating. All weaboos from this world i'll say it this time once: STOP FANTASING ABOUT JAPANESE GIRLS
To be fair, most guys enamored with Japanese girls aren't interested in marriage anyway. Marriage is a busted government institution regardless where you go.
High rates of infidelity is one of the major reasons why the birth rate is so low. Many men dont want to risk being cheated on simply cause they are overworked
birth rate is not low at least its higher than people think there are 7 countries that have lower birthrate than Japan and 12 that have birthrate same as Japan its Spain italy Greece Ukrain Belarus Bosnia Uae Swisserland Finland singapure portugal Taiwan saint Pierre island moldavia but no one talks about them why no one talking about spain for example or Greece everyone is Japan Japan Japan Japan
Yes...it is good when birth rates are low...so the human race can end and government and elites have no one else to exploit. The world is cruel and who will be in the right state of mind to reproduce...
@@allenk6373 might be that the birthrate is affecting Japan more than the countries you mention. Might be that Japan struggles more with their social skills (communication between partners) nationwide and therefore birthrate 'feels' more at risk. Could be that these other countries just arent very interesting lol
Infidelity a major reason for Birthrate being low shows how ignorant people are in comment section, birthrate being low means that the cost of living in a country is high, hmm, oh well i guess you lot dont know what's "high cost of living" anyway..
I was married for 10 years to a Japanese woman. We had four children. I did everything and took care of the kids and worked full time. She cheated and got the kids. I lost everything. I was there for the kids. I was there for family. Sometimes people just think the grass is greener on the other side. 「隣の芝生は青い」って感じかな。叱ったないで皆言うられる。。。それの後で国に帰って方が良いんじゃない。絶対無理です。子供が成長するとき、僕が捨てたと思わせたく無いじゃん。私は日本への移民として国を去りました、そして人々は私に家に帰るように言います、信じられないです。 私の家族は移民でした。
You know well it won't last with that other dude. Once he will empty his balls, he will seek another chick. So your ex wife will be alone again. And older. And you, you will pick up a younger chick.
So basically communication is a universal key in any relationship. When you fall in love with the good side of a person, be prepared to accept their bad side as well. None of us are perfect.
Yh but the lack of communication in relationship in the west is different to Japan. I was so surprised when the man in the video said couples talking about sex is awkward like y’all are couples 😭 in the west the lack of communication is more like small things while in Japanese rut more like fool on shynesses or blatant indirectness but that is their culture. I think this awkwardness being in the couple is probably because the men work long ours so never get to interact and break the ice with the woman. It’ll literally be like being in a relationship with an acquaintance :(
So to basically sum this all up, communication is the name of the game boys and girls. If you don't communicate, and you don't spend any time together, I think it's very easy to see why you'd drift apart from someone, even your spouse. A lot of these issues are perpetuated by Japan's toxic (but changing for the better) work culture as well as the need to hide your true feelings (honne) and basically sugar coat everything that you say (tatemae). I personally don't think you should ever be afraid to tell your spouse or significant other your true feelings as it isn't healthy for the relationship and generally prevents you from forming a true connection.
the main thing that keeps men and women together is great sex not communication...if the communication is lousy and the sex always fantastic they will stay together...it's pretty basic sweaty stinky stuff
Very informative..I was married to a Japanese woman and was ultimately cheated on which destroyed the marriage. No amount of discussion could solve the problem..she just wouldn’t be honest about her feelings.. Thanks for your commentary.
I have worked with Japanese engineers for months and I could not question their dedication to solve the issues at hand. But I always question why they need to spend extra hours in the office, even without doing anything. They still think ‘long hours = hard work’ and never effectively consider Productivity and Efficiency: they do fall asleep in the middle of meetings, and this could even be weirdly considered admirable as a sign of hard work; or spend breaks smoking or drinking coffee to fight sleepiness. I think this is one of the factors why Japan is fast losing its advantage on technology (e.g. Samsung > Sony or Panasonic) or economic strength (china > Japan). I was also wondering how they could make their wives happy on all aspects with them actually being corporate slaves.
It's true that endless hours doesn't equate to higher productivity. During sleep, toxins are cleared from the brain (saw this on Pindex.) Not enough sleep: brain doesn't work as well.
@homma 40 True or not- but unless there is a scientific data that shows a high correlation between ‘hardworking’ and ‘cheating index’, then it may not be a good conclusion, especially since another variability is introduced (Japan and Brazil- with their own unique culture, work ethics, morals, etc.,..).
@@homma409 you actually make a really good point. In my country also, the working hours are pretty tame. But the cheating stats are insanely high probably as high as Brazil's but less than Japan. There are more complex factors at play here than what meets the eye. I suppose first and foremost it's the culture that determines how much people cheat. Cheating stats among Muslims and Indian Christians are very low. And they work really long hours. But I know their cultures are extremely family-oriented and anti-cheating.
Welcome to Asia,.... the greatest wasters of office time I've ever seen. When your day starts off with changing into a sweater, putting your slippers on, and drinking a large cup of coffee (green tea in China), then commence to looking out the window,.......YOU KNOW IT'S GONNA BE A PRODUCTIVE DAY ! .....OH, LUNCH TIME ALREADY !!!
After studying Japanese culture and Japanese for many years, as much as I respect many aspects of it, I do hope that being more direct about what you want or need-especially in romantic partnerships-becomes normalized in the culture soon. It must be so hard to be in a relationship otherwise…
That would require a major shift in the culture and how Japanese communicate in general. Directness is not something Japanese people, in general, are known for doing. That'll take generations realistically, although there are always individual exceptions.
@@kabysummit5801 the sushi chef was behaving aggressively to the two waitresses wearing boxes on their backs. I was rather shocked by his demeanor. The girls weren't here in San Jose for long as they scurried about. Sad. Now baby, what can we do as a group to get the porn actresses out of Japan that aren't happy?
@@danielwilliams2735 I think the sushi chefs are ornery thinking too highly of themselves. As to porn actresses, what's the point about getting them out of their own country? The equivalents in the US have high suicide rates. Grass is not greener here.
@@darkreaper4990 To be fair, Japanese people often do the same thing with foreigners. Seen tons of examples of Japanese women who only get together with foreign men in order to improve their English or because they have a pre conceived image of western men. And also Japanese men who get together with western women for their "exotic" beauty. So let's not act like it's a one way thing.
What I got from this video is that you should date neither a Japanese man or woman. Communication is one of the foundation and building blocks of any relationship. Without it, you're doomed from the start. Japan seems like such a sad and lonely place to be. I feel sorry for them. Imagine not wanting to go home after work because you want to avoid your *family*!
I wouldn’t generalise an entire nation based on some patterns. I’ve been happily married to a Japanese woman for 20 years. She is the most direct and communicative person I know :) Don’t date a nationality, date a person and you’ll be fine! (Edit: you’ll be fine most of the time, lol).
@@syasyaishavingfun To be fair, he likely is Caucasian, the more acceptable exception. Might still be frowned upon, but far more acceptable if dark skin tones because of beauty standards.
there is many similarities between Japanese work culture and where I work, long hours and team culture, nobody wants to be the first to leave even if you are done and not doing anything. Also, going home to the family can be stressful also. Marriage can become sexless after kids and coming home is more like coming home to roommates rather than loving family, so cheating is only way to release sexual needs
Understandable, albeit a lousy excuse to justify what's essentially wrong with the world today: people want the glorious wedding day, the wonder of their children's birth; but when the crunch comes that they need to be responsible and realise they chose the life they're in, they immediately start blaming everyone except for themselves. Bills need paying, mouths need feeding, clothes and so on, thus you work to pay for it; that's the way of the world and when you're home, you be the parent, you be the partner and you do it without complaint and certainly don't go throwing it away just because of a spat or a dry spell. There is never a good enough reason to cheat: for men or for women. Disregarding vows like the ones made in marriage is as immature as a child who can't keep a promise and never is expected to do so.
It’s a sad thing to be cheated on. In America, it’s a very big problem when it comes to relationships and marriage as I’m sure it’s a problem worldwide as well. It’s one of several reasons why so many in America do the hookup culture which is so ubiquitous. Marriages are decreasing and some folks are just living together only instead of being married. Glad this is being covered by you Nobita.
Law system will get involved and create laws for this kind of situations. For example... If you lived together with your sexual partner for a couple of years, the law will investigate and considerate that as "free marriage" so... Yeah married
I've lived in Japan for 5 years now. I once worked as a Newspaper delivery guy. We usually start work at midnight and deliver morning newspapers until 4 am. And let me tell you, there is a lot of degeneracy and cheating that I saw night after night. Married women who I thought were meek and respectful, were having sex at some young person's car in a parking lot at 2 am. Some guys dropping off a naked lady at her house by 3 am. It was absolutely a shock to me. I also knew some of my co-workers that time were doing quickies with married women during the afternoon deliveries. I relented, and I too became involved in an affair with my married teacher at the Tech College I attended. So yeah, sorry to burst some people's bubbles, Japanese women are far from being angels and definitely far from being loyal women. Some won't even hesitate for a moment and just go into absolute degeneracy if given the chance.. this is what their general loneliness do to them. It's kinda sad if you think about it.
Well like you said, they’re lonely. You just got to show them love and affection just like anybody else and communicate. They’re mostly cheating because they don’t get that love from home, be it physically or emotionally.
@@lelouchlamperouge3077 technically it's people/women everywhere😂😂 but aspects that are unique to Japan like loneliness and suppression of sexual desires causes some strange scenarios.
" I also knew some of my co-workers that time were doing quickies with married women during the afternoon deliveries" sounds like it came straight out of hentais lmao
You hit the nail on the head, Nobita: if you don't change the culture first, legislation is not going to change a thing. As long as Japanese women feel that men that don't work themselves to the bone are useless, and even men themselves stop think it, you guys are screwd. It has to be talked about on the media and other places. Family is paramount, expending time with your love ones is paramount and (and this connect with one of your videos) mental health is paramount. All these three things are of the upmost importance and strictly connected. People function better when they feel loved and appreciated.
Welcome to the club! After seeing this video, I'm now thinking of moving to Japan and remain a single man, while providing a lot of love and attention that so many Japanese women are craving for. Hell, maybe I could even teach them how to communicate better with their spouses and boyfriends! Wanna come along for the adventure? 😂
I think it's because sex in our era is more important than everything else combined. Both men and women are getting bombarded with sex related material constantly. What do you think it's going to happen ?
That Relationship Therapist on the video certainly seems to suggest this too. Men and women are built for cheating, apparently. What a perfect example of the modern mindset.
s3x...rihhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhht the ultimate form of intimacy is more important than everything else combined. It IS everything IN COMBINED. It's hugging, touching, looking into one's eyes, all of it. What's disappeared is the NEED FOR MEANINGFUL S3X. Plenty of authors in the past 6 years wrote about this issue. It's just now people want to have what in their closet or refrigerator. That's all that's really changed which makes traditional s3x look OUTDATED or vanilla. That's all. Trust that people want more the oreos, then the talenti moroccan pecan chip then sandwich with all the trimmings. Then the teryaki salad and rose' or mimosa of S#X. All of the variety in between. That's all. And there's nothing wrong with that just have to make up their mind. Do you want that kind of food everyday or just once in a while or you want to steer clear of it because it's too addictive and can make you gain weight. It's a food metaphor for s3x.
It is not even about sex. It is a demeaning of sex. It is lust. This pornographic culture we live in kills love. It takes something beautiful, sacred, even, and turns it into a pastime.
"I didn't feel being loved" This part and many others make it seem to me that women don't actually cheat for the same reasons as men overall (as opposed to what one of the first person talking was saying). Not to "spread their seeds" (how would women do that, I assume she meant "for purely sexual desire"), but to feel a connection with someone. While at the same time pushing away their husband if they come early (according to those accounts here) which is quite paradoxal.
I heard that it's pretty common for men in Japan to use brothels ("heath" businesses, soapland, compensated dating etc) over there. How does that tie into all this? Would they consider that cheating? That would qualify as cheating to me. Edit: typo
@@TheJapanReporter Thanks for replying! Well my next question would be... What if women were using "health" services just as frequently as men and it was just as accepted in society? Do you think there would be as many relationship issues as there are now?
I mean at firts it kinda seems me pretty out of place, but i came to the realization of why they see it like that, and i think its cames with the culture differences and persception with an contrast between western people and asian. I dont wanna defend them or being againts but instead trying to undertand from where it came that way of thinking which if you give a little of thinking it kinda make sense from their point of view.
it(cultural indirectness) ran up against the 21st and 22nd century and lost big time. Can't compete with what is coming neither wait til that web 5.0 is here. You think 2 people sit on the couch and text other people now. Wait til web 5.0 is at the door. You'll see your gf/bf wife or husband very little then now to the point it won't be a point.
Dealt with two cheating J wives 1st in Fukuoka, 2nd Ozone Nagoya - not surprising J wives have a lot of time on their hands, JAV is freely available with one of the most popular categories is the Married woman having an affair.
I think one of the biggest reason why women cheat in Japan is because they don't love the person in the first place. Women don't marry someone they love here in Japan. They marry because the guy earns big money or has the potential to earn big money and they ignore the other bad stuff the guy have. One of the category I always hear from some good looking women is he must earn 10 million yen a year. They don't marry cuz of love but marry because of money. That's why when a Japanese and a non Japanese have a child it's automatically called "Ai no ko" or love child. When I heard that I immediately think "wait aren't all japanese children made with love?". And that's kinda sad
The annoying thing is that while these are valid reasons, the actions don't match the statements. The pandemic has shown how if a man does spend more time at home that tensions are often worse. Communication is key, but it will likely not solve this issue alone. I feel sorry for the Japanese because their culture does not incentivize healthy relationships and even profits off unhealthy ones. Hopefully people won't delude themselves into thinking these are acceptable reasons to cheat and instead work on the underlying issues instead. It's harder than cheating and may not bear fruit in the end, but nothing worthwhile in life is easy.
Yup, Japan doesnt incentive healthy relationships since they're children, i mean, they barely hug their kids. Imagine what can come from that lack of closeness on an early age.
@@ShonenBeats I had an Asian classmate in college and he would remark how cold his parents are to him compared to American parents, specifically Latinos (I'm Latino). They'd barely hug him or even say they love him.
@@JohnDoe-pt7ru Lol deadass. i'm Asian-American and lowkey I thought my parents hated me for like 18 years because they never showed affection like the American families I see on TV. Then I realized that they do love me (and they love me lots)-- they just show it in a veryyy different way. ,I'd imagine a lot of Asian societies are like this but unfortunately it can lead to confusion and misunderstandings. Such as in the case of a relationship-- for most people, if you're not actively communicating that you love/support them, then they'll take it as you're being cold.
I used to go to Japan for 15 years. I had several contacts with Japanese women, as a lover, as a friend or just as a pen pal... what I learned is most of them are superficial, lazy and not reliable, at least until they're 40. It's like they're teenager until 40. I definitely agree when you say they are not the angel that foreigners used to think. Medias always say that men are the problem but I found that women have their responsibilities too. How can you have a good family with such women. But nowadays, I think it's not only in Japan.
it's because of hypergamy and the delusion of age is just a number until they realize 'oh sh......I am aging' i better get me a serious relationship because they realize they won't be young forever.
Honestly that's women everywhere. I think modern culture has been so infected with feminism that across the globe women are just abandoning traditional values and roles then when they hit the older years, they realize they fucked up but it's too late.
agreed. Japanese women are soooo lazy. They don't want to work just pop out kids and stay at cafes all day with other moms spending their husbands money.
I always tell people that Japan is what the US is heading towards over the next 5-10 years. Japan had its rise of feminism before the US and is still suffering the consequences. Hypergamy, hypersexualization, lack of commitment, etc.
Shouldn't they be loyal to each other? Also as adults they should resist their desire. Somehow this makes me think that they are like child in mind yet grown up in body
I read that there is so much academic pressure on Japanese, especially boys, that they don't really have much childhood, so when they become adults, they kind of go wild as much as they can. But if they get married before getting this out of their system, they go wild and "play" as adults. Adults often play through sex. Also, many people in Japan get married because of familial or societal pressure, not because they fall in love, so the marriage becomes more of a contract, missing emotion.
With all due respect, why should any deny their happiness? Why live in silent misery? The solution is not cheating but both need communicate their views and needs, before marriage, for compatibility. Once married, be honest, fix the problem or divorce and move on. Another reason why many Asian women outside of asia refer non Asian men. Those men are more open with their emotions.
I knew a guy here in Japan who's ex-wife was an alcoholic and completely neglected the children. On top of this, the guy was an older business owner from the UK; however, he still lost the custody battle.
That's not a japanese thing. Women in generall cheat more often while younger. Men tend to cheat when they get 50+ but that's still rare compared to women.
So according to this video my chances of being cheated are 50% omg I can't feel more sad for the poor Japanese women and men who can't find true love and internal soul peace. I feel like I want to help and give assistance, I knew what was feeling empty and rotten because of not finding the true love.
Create an app that talks about their culture but centers around not only the things that make interaction between men and women center but also helps them with their intimacy. Then onboard a young person to help with marketing to young couples. Simple and done. if you take this idea and it takes off just see a man with great vision from the future helped me create this concept. I'll be watching somewhere and will know it was you who read my comment. I'll laugh while on my catamaran in the middle of the ocean while eating mint chocolate chip ice cream. Be well.
This makes so much sense, I've been watching Japanese movies lately and 90% of the time, there's cheating by either both parties or the woman. It's shocking and sad . This video explains why it is the way it is which is still sad but if the Japanese society realises what the issue is then they can work towards solving it. No one wants to or should live like that
This is a wonderful channel that I just found and am already fascinated. I visited Japan a few years ago for a holiday and it was an amazing experience. This is a great way to keep in touch with an intriguing culture while looking forward to the next travel opportunity. Thank you…..🤝
Percentage who have cheated in Japan: Women: 44% Men: 40% It's not really looking that good for anybody. Kudos to the 56% of Japanese women and the 60% of Japanese men who never have cheated.
Those numbers are very low. Remember those are who admitted it. Many will lie or not consider something cheating because of several reasons ("it was just a fling" etc)
@@JohnDoe-pt7ru Yeah, you're right. Honesty is the best policy. Just because someone says they've never cheated doesn't make it true. I think, as a species, we need to renew our commitment to marriage as an ideal. We need to value it, and be willing to sacrifice for it, and be willing to uphold it, and be willing to guard it more than we might a very expensive car, or even a very expensive house, or even a very high paying job, because, let's admit it: A good quality marriage is worth far more than the best car, the most expensive house, and the highest paying job, because there's no faster way to misery than a failed marriage, no matter how great your car, house or job is.
@@thecommenter9267 I stand corrected. I think we all just grew complement. We took marriage for granted, to our own harm. We were ignorant. We were foolish, like little children, not knowing what we were doing, because we lacked maturity and situation awareness.
So many of those points overlap and build off each other, I could see how something as simple as continuing date nights into marriage could address all of those points. If a husband is willing to take some time off work for date nights (#1), it show that he values time with his wife and builds her confidence (#4) and encourages honest communication (including #6). That communication leads to resolutions about those issues (#2) and reduces the need to find fulfillment outside of the marriage (#5) or the need to seek a divorce (#3). Am I saying this is foolproof and guaranteed to work? No, but it is better than doing the same thing and expecting better results. And just like trying to improver your own physical health, making an intentional positive change can have some results, then you can then start working on other necessary changes to further improve your results until you are back in a healthy state. Personally, I find it frustrating, as a man who has been single for many years, to see married men just let their marriages decay, especially when a little effort (and a little growing up in a particular case) would not have lead to cheating or divorce.
Wow your amazing u understand what makes a good marriage:) I’m surprised your not married? More men should follow your lead. Keep enlightening others this is your calling.🙏👍
Well if you get married you'll definitely get cheated on with that type of thinking. Women will cheat and what you do is irrelevant no matter how much effort you put in it to work.
@@prasadpatil1160 I admit that my plan isn't foolproof or perfect but a better solution would need to be more specific to the couple and their particular problems. If there is any detail that I probably missed, it is that there needs to be commitment on both sides. The challenges that life throws at us can lead to waning commitment. That is why effort is put into the relationship before it gets to a crisis, safeguards are put in place before a temptation is encountered, so that the commitment is reinforced in both. As long as the wife is not invested into the relationship and safeguarding against temptations, the husband’s efforts are in vain. I know two couples who divorced because the wife’s high school sweetheart came back into the picture and she gave up on her husband. It was not that their husbands’ efforts were insufficient, but they both gave into the temptation of “what could have been” and divorced their husbands to pursue that old flame. That said, I’ve known other couples who have not had that problem, they have had an old sweetheart come back into the picture and stayed with their spouse. They never even let themselves entertain the temptation because they were committed to the point of not letting an ex become a wedge between them. If you are fatalistic, thinking that "Women will cheat and what you do is irrelevant...", how could you ever build a trusting relationship? How could you fully commit to someone you anticipate will betray you? How could a woman commit to you if she thought you were going cheat no matter what she does for you? If you want to keep thinking that way, go ahead but don’t think your pessimism means that you are more enlightened.
Japanese: I'm unsatisfied so I'm going to have sex with a stranger, destroy my family, scar my child, push my spouse towards depression and suicide while also contributing to the collapse of the society. Me: Why don't you just talk to your spouse about the issues? Japanese: That would be awkward!
When physical attraction disappears, rarely does any amount of talking bring it back. Not excusing cheating - of course that's shitty, but just saying it's not a matter of simply "talking"
@@thecommenter9267 They specifically mention that in the video hence my comment. Also, physical attraction always disappears because we all inevitably age out of attractiveness. You think your spouse is gonna be hot at 50, 60, 70+ you're a lemming.
@@gjg5789 I completely agree that physical attraction disappears eventually. I just don't think communication is some kind of magic cure to bring a relationship back to life. Is it better than not having it? Sure. But I think it's more important to understand that at a certain point your relationship will turn from one based on lust to one based on compassion and to accept that for what it is. Rather than trying to keep the lust fire alive by "communicating"
@@thecommenter9267 You're wrong. Talking is EVERYTHING. Once you put someone in a state of hypnosis the sky is the limit. That's how I acquired my seven wives as an exceedingly ugly and poor male.
@@gjg5789 That's great, but ask yourself this. Why did 6 out of 7 wives end up leaving you? If you really did have 7 wives, that means that you never even went past the lust stage with any of them, so how would you even know the impact of communication once your lust dies? You wouldn't because your relationships have all been based on lust.
Unfortunately, people seems to be take advantage of this situation rather than try to help fix it...This & reasons No.6 could be the key to the whole problem I guess. If I have a husband someday, I will give him a hug everytime he's coming home from work & that's for the least!
If this doesn’t change and men are taught to communicate with women, your birth rate will decline. Plus loyalty is a must or your men will resent all women and go outside the country to find a better one.
If he is a bad man, why did she marry him? There No good reason to cheat. Say goodbye, then fuck someone else. Be sure before getting married, cause it's a lifetime contract. End of the story, so tired to hear excuses...
Thank you Nobita. Enjoyed you profound analysis of this somehow difficult topic. Thank you also for tackling all these difficult issues in Japan in your videos. 👍👍👍
I agree with everything you said Nobita. The woman who said it’s women’s desire is to spread her seed is very reductionist. Yes some women want to have lots of children, but what they crave most is security. When you want to have a family you need a stable relationship and income. Which gives stability. The problem it seems is that Japanese couples seem to jump into marriage due to societal pressure. They don’t get to really know one another and jump in during the honeymoon phase when you see the person with rose colored glasses. I do admire those who want to date someone with the intentions of marriage, but if you don’t know your partner enough and you don’t communicate then how could you possibly want to start a family with this person if you can’t even be honest about your thoughts and feelings. Especially if you have insecurities you need to pipe up people aren’t mind readers. Also don’t ever think you fully know someone people are constantly changing and you might learn something new about the person you love.
I hate cheating. Once a cheater, always a cheater. I'm a faithful guy and pretty old fashioned so I don't believe in second chances, once trust is broken it can never be returned. Thank you for the very nice video again, Nobita. ありがとうございました。
The way I see it, a lot of Japanese men are not romantic. They look cold or strict. And it could just be their upbringing or culture but some women are looking for romance or affection and someone to give them attention.,,which could be one of the reasons why they cheat. Communication and respect is so important in a relationship no matter how long you have been together.
Honestly, I respect the values of working for a group and ensuring everyone’s success and well-being. However, I can not find it in me to respect how working more hours is more valued than producing results.
working more hours is an honor thing. It says to the boss etc., that you're willing to do everything for the company and whoever survives out of the bosses shortlist will reap the rewards and/or benefits of being included in the companies future plans. So that big project even if you weren't selected you still could get the seniority for things others couldnt' get seniority for which makes all the difference for how you are perceived by your peers, and other business types at other companies within your field or area of expertise. That's why you see that old salaryman with grey hair who's respected and you have no idea why(that's if you visited Japan before for or any heavily populated Asian district city because he 'out competed' everyone for his spot or he was a man of seniority where his peers died off and he was the only guy left who is still around to know how to run the business exactly in the way it was run decades ago and add to it with todays models. It's how things were done in Japan.
@@kangtheconquerortheninth3826 That’s a pretty interesting concept although it’s competitive. I can see how hours can show commitment and dedication. It’s kind of good because it puts value on the process. Analogy: It’s like learning vs getting good grades. If I learn from a class and get good grades I will have grown from that experience. If I just get good grades, and my understanding is not up to par, then my results will falsely reflect my capabilities. Either way I have to get good grades but understanding is more important(well to me that is) Despite all that, I think it’s impractical. It really puts people’s health at risk. Competing for seniority with hours worked as opposed age or results rubs me the wrong way. I think I could better understand this way of thinking by actually improving my Japanese and talking to people, but until then, that’s what I think.
I’ve been thinking about this for a bit and understood that these values were in place because they had to be at one time. It was a matter of survival for teamwork like this to happen. In modern times, most people in developed countries can eat and sleep comfortably. Many things have become convenient making survival easier. We have more options so this old model for developing a career is becoming a little obsolete. I’m a young person and I’m not lazy. I just don’t want to work for nothing.
@Nobita from Japan 7:15 I'm not sure how you call this "less conflict'.... I would rank infidelity, divorce, custody battles, and suicide as some of the highest conflicts you can have
OK no. I am 52 years old an i have never cheated. So that stuff about all people cheat. No. That is a personality thing. You think you can get away with it and that is why you cheat. When you understand that it is wrong and not accepted. THEN you realize cheating is wrong. An wont do it. You make it clear Cheating is wrong and people wont do it.
Modern day intimate relationships usually just boils down to finger pointing, anyway. I’ｍ going to focus on my own career success instead. Yeah, people will make fun of me for being “single” or virgin, but when I die I want to die with my own objectives fufilled, and it does not include dating.
There's is indeed a lot of Asian women fetish in the West where they're seen as the perfect Trad wives, especially Japanese women. Getting married and having kids needs to be less of a social status and more of a personal development goal. There is a social pressure in more traditional societies to get married and have kids, which is toxic as hell. Not everyone can be a good parent or spouse. The fact that so many men would rather loaf around then spend time with their families is sad. I'm optimistic though, Japanese will not change as quickly as other countries will, but they fact they are trying to implement policies to soften the work culture is a sign that some people want to fix these situations.
2:11 that's just ignoring the problem, if you didn't want a wife so you get married and if you didn't want a partner so you have a relationship *a relationship means committing to a person as equals and solving things together* simpler if you just stay alone. The one who doesn't go home will only end up affecting you in the end. both physically and mentally because you would be as if you were working overtime without physical rest.
It is unfortunate that Japanese men take their life after losing their wife and child, it doesn’t change in the US but at lease we have groups to help each other
They are way too loud. I used to be loud too but I could never be that loud. Shame. They seem like they have great personalities. If only they had a sound button.
@@troublemakers9760 but they are sincere, other women will act like subbmissive house wife and cheat on you at your back, maybe they are so sick of acting like house wife all the time and satfisy their hidden desires by cheating? Gyraus arent traditional but they fullfill their desires so they can stay loyal to someone. Also why would u want a robot instead of a funny, different, strong willed girl?
@@esra3387 Because most men are attracted to feminine characteristics. Loud and overly independent are not what most men look for. Don't hate the players, hate the game.
@@thecommenter9267 Why would i hate this? Hate is strong wrong. I just don't care not hate. I just wanted to warm guys because their submissive waifu are likely cheat on them at their back when they are away. Also they are boring as hell af. The video is about this topic, and if u ask me, im not loud nor submissive, i'm just i.
Hi Nobita, Im from Puerto Rico I enjoy your channel very much and admire the good things of Japanese culture. It is really sad and depresing to be honest, by the long working hours, cheating apps, the hentai culture, the wife being alone for long time and not feeling loved, host clubs and the red district can affect marriage, breack families and cause lonliness, I hope there still good men and women in Japan who are willing to be good partners and be loyal. But this happens all around the globe, here in the west things like social media and dating apps like Tinder are destroying marriages and relationships, it is a reality that wee need to face But there are Good Man and Good Women out there wee just need to know how choose well and be self-aware from the type of person who can be by are side.
Women are subservient to men in Japan. Every man is given respect whether he's dealing with his own wife or girlfriend,or someone else's. They rarely talk back and never turn in a man for anything he may do. In that society, you're always looking to "move up", the men know this all too well.
The fact is jack of all trades cannot defeat specialist. Meaning role of husband in marriage as partner, father, spouse, friend, head of family etc. Therefore women cheat to get the special role from other men and it's not all about sex, they can cheat for affection, money, mental health etc that they can get from the husband.
I am a foreigner living in Japan for past 2 years, and honestly, it gets hard for me to know any 'dark reality ' of Japan because of lack of communication in my work place as well as from friends who don't connect well or share their true feelings. Your videos are great, Mr. Nobita, and brought light to many observations I had that made me wonder why Japanese women (some are close friends), with amazing beauty, feel insecure. It's unfortunate. I wish the women to feel empowered in Japan.
Honestly, Japanese people have massive communication problems in general. The entire culture is steeped in it. The path to a happy relationship requires open and honest communication. But good luck trying to get a Japanese person to open up about their true feelings and wants.
Really interesting video, but I strongly disagree with the reasons given that japanese women cheat related to insecurity and not feeling loved. Women just don't take accountability, no matter what country you're in. If the woman cheats, it's the man's fault. If a man cheats, it's also the man's fault. It's BS. Women need to take accountability for their own behavior and stop blaming others.
I disagree with your assessment, you paint a very ignorant and narrow-minded opinion about women, not all women who cheat are like that and certainly not all women in general are like that. And alot of the times it IS the men's fault, don't pretend like men are innocent, many of them are not and have done horrible things that causes some women to cheat, more often than not it's because the men were already cheating on their wives or they were abusive towards their wives, thus leading the wives to cheat on them and find comfort in other people. And there are many men who also never take responsibility for their own actions and always blaming women for everything. Of course not all men are cheating and abusive assholes who don't take responsibility for their own actions, some men are good. And likewise not all women are cheaters who blame men for everything, there are many good women who are loyal too and take responsibility for their own actions.
It's crazy because marriage is messed up in the USA too. People get married for the wrong reasons, toxic relationships, etc. I have seen some crazy stories both personal and online.
what a pos, imagine betraying someone who provides for you who you supposedly love, for "the thrill of it" like what kind of soulless animal do you have to be? I like how you say its the men's fault the women cheat, as if women have no responsibility or something. Yeah they are distant because they actually work, to provide for them. The fact that people like you think this is a justified reaction, rather than breaking up, tells me how narcissistic and completely inhuman people are. Maybe if you don't think your partner is doing enough break up with them instead of being a human leech.
Imagine being such an animalistic creature, that you cheat "because of the thrill" less than human, sad that people with that mindset are living in the world, if you feel that way I hope you become a human windchime.2
Hearing a Japanese person say sugar daddy/sugar mommy is insane to me, wow..... Japan is crazy for their wild juxtaposition of the perception of Japan versus the of the dark stuff happening in the under tone
japanese work culture is exactly the reason why i'm telling my Japanese gf to come live with me in Belgium instead of me living in japan. I'd rather work to live instead of living to work.
In the West, if our divorce rate was 15%, we would probably cheat more, too? Divorce, alimony, and child support just aren’t as practical/available in Japan as in the U.S.
In my view there's no good reason for cheating, Either you fix the relationship or you leave it, Either you step up or you step out. I always step up, It can be time consuming, It can take alot of effort and be emotionally damaging, But that's what relationships are, That's what Love is. If it's worth it to you, You'll do anything to keep your partner. If it's true love, It's always worth it to you. My motto is True love or no love.
![Why Loveless Marriage is So Common in Japan [ENG CC]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/XZ7JmjrZ2nA/mqdefault.jpg)
Who do you think cheats more, men or women?
7:08 Sorry, typo: 'indirectness' (T_T)
Both, I heard Japanese men for some weird reason tend to have sex with prositute than his wife, Since the wife is not getting it from her husband so she had an affair.
Both are guilty of doing it.
I think the difference is pretty much irrelevant.
Some people, men and women, like to point the finger at the other gender to claim that they suck more because they cheat more.
Truth is, both genders cheat a lot, because there are shitty people born male and shitty people born female.
In Japan, I would guess women because men working long hours don't have time to cheat.😅 But how one defines cheating would affect the answer, too.
Fee-males have always cheated more, proof? Out of 100% of men, only the top 20% or less will cheat, why? Because they can. The 80 to 40% rarely cheat(they're lucky they have 1 fee-male), and the bottom 40% won't, because no fee-male will touch them. The top 80% of fee-males can get "it", anytime they want it from any guy, and most do. The bottom 20% become hard core lefty g!rl power lez-fasc!sts. And having there be many more fee-males on earth than men, it's easy to see why the average fee-male, is a garden tool.
Nobita, you've become such a serious cultural sociologist for Japan, I really appreciate your efforts and insights into the often not discussed aspects of Japanese society.
Naw not fooled by this Nobita guy, each video hes trying to dissuade foreigners from thinking about pursuing Japanese girls, I see you Nobita, but Im still taking your girls over there, Japanese girls are the hottest and the best in everyway
@@funkthat Totally disagree with your assessment of Nobita. He's discussing challenging topics in a way that is rarely discussed. He didn't say all Japanese women are cheaters. He's only investigating the cultural and societal reasons that it happens.
He is NOT using any valid source though. And his videos are very manipulative. I'm Japanese and googled this cheating matter in Japanese. All the top websites say men cheat more, and also the cheating rate is between 20% and 40% depending on the website. I don't know where he is finding the info but it's more like the case that he wants to believe what he wants to believe. He shouldn't use the result of the questionnaire from a minor female magazine (he shows it's from "Marisol" in the video, and the magazine is not known at all), especially when this information could be easily manipulated. In a famous female magazine "Oggi" website, they say they surveyed a total of 800 men and women and showed man's cheating rate was 22% and women's cheating rate was 18% respectively. So how trustworthy is Nobita's information? Female magazines NEVER are valid sources. Seriously though, I don't know if he ever learned the concept of media literacy but if you cited information for a paper in the way he does, it would be rejected at university as it's not using a valid resource. I find his opinions very dogmatic. Please take it with a grain of salt.
So basically couples need to be more intimate in relationships whether it be emotionally, sexually, or just physically to make it work, this is the same anywhere and I hope Japan fixes this.
They need to learn to be less socially accommodating. They need to learn to say "No."
@@decwow Agreed. How can anything be productive or change with a culture of indirectness.
There's no such thing as love
@@TheIshmael98 dunno, japanese woman cheats more than japanese men isnt something i wanna change. do you sweetie.
I agree with every point, except wanna add - it's not up to JAPAN to fix it, but up to the JAPANESE themselves to make decisions that would fix it! ;)
People need to take these matters into their own hands and not wait for "miracles".
"the lower self-worth se has, the more likely she is to cheat" ... damn that resumes pretty well my first experience, constantly trying to help her see how pretty she was and got cheated on, great...
damn bro, well atleast you know now, we live for experiences, stay strong king
In other words most women in Japan have low self esteem
@@irisvanjunior4512 Yeah, thanks. It's amazing how many things you learn about you and that person when you look back with a cold mind
Stay strong..
@Tracchofyre which channel?
I've always wondered how people end up being married when they can't communicate properly.
Marriage is such a serious thing, why would you marry someone if you can't even talk to them about what you like in bed, or what is making you unhappy etc?
It's like some people marry because society expects them to marry, and then they don't know how to deal with the hurdles that naturally come with relationships.
Thanks for the video as usual, Nobita!
Family forcing them to get married in a short period of time after they met plays a factor too.
Exactly
they're following the norms which is getting married before 30s, I believe it's 25 that's it's ideal to get married for them?(not sure)
Most of their ideals are also looking for something physical qualities and basic characteristics.. but in the end things didn't works out.
"It's like some people marry because society expects them to marry, and then they don't know how to deal with the hurdles that naturally come with relationships."
Bingo.
Because in a conservitive society, marriage is more about image and respectability. Rather than an emotional commitment, and that leads to people being pressured into commitments they don't really want, or that don't line up with all thier values.
They feel that if they don't fit into the mold they will be an outcast. So they do what they have to do what they have to for image sake and just do what they really want discreetly. And that becomes the norm. It's no way to live.
Ironically the thing I hate about living in Japan is the dating scene. It’s getting more and and more degenerate and untrustworthy
If you don't mind me asking, what do you mean with "degenerate" in this case?
I was under the impression that Japanese society has dating rules that would be considered more conservative in the West, since casual sex isn't as common there as it is here AFAIK, and you usually have to officially date someone to have sex with them.
But I might be entirely wrong, of course, lol
@@LeoVital casual sex is extremely common. I’m living near kabukicho now and walking there at night makes me feel like a doomer. Seeing young girls in dresses with signs around their neck etc or the panty vending machines. Yeah, it’s a small part of Japan, but it’s still a large industry
Complete degeneracy
@@johnnyguitar8067 you clearly don’t know what young people do here
Blame tinder and similar apps. You can still find good people if you know where to look. Or try not living in a big city
Try here in the US, a lot of girls already lost track of their body count.
Open the minds of those foreigners obsessed with Japanese women. You are doing great work Nobita!
Maybe foreigners will have more time and interest in their Japanese wives.
@@minako_bg That's true but they need to be very careful
I'm afraid i have to disagree, cause there still many dumbass weaboo sayin' hook me to a japanese girls, they not learn anything about this topic yet, it's so irritating.
All weaboos from this world i'll say it this time once:
STOP FANTASING ABOUT JAPANESE GIRLS
To be fair, most guys enamored with Japanese girls aren't interested in marriage anyway. Marriage is a busted government institution regardless where you go.
Why obsessed with Japanese women only? Instead of all women?
High rates of infidelity is one of the major reasons why the birth rate is so low. Many men dont want to risk being cheated on simply cause they are overworked
birth rate is not low
at least its higher than people think
there are 7 countries that have lower birthrate than Japan
and 12 that have birthrate same as Japan
its
Spain
italy
Greece
Ukrain
Belarus
Bosnia
Uae
Swisserland
Finland
singapure
portugal
Taiwan
saint Pierre island
moldavia
but no one talks about them
why no one talking about spain for example
or Greece
everyone is Japan
Japan
Japan
Japan
Yes...it is good when birth rates are low...so the human race can end and government and elites have no one else to exploit. The world is cruel and who will be in the right state of mind to reproduce...
@@allenk6373 well, nobita is a Japanese native; its not far fetched to think hed talk solely about his country’s issues, yk
@@allenk6373 might be that the birthrate is affecting Japan more than the countries you mention.
Might be that Japan struggles more with their social skills (communication between partners) nationwide and therefore birthrate 'feels' more at risk.
Could be that these other countries just arent very interesting lol
Infidelity a major reason for Birthrate being low shows how ignorant people are in comment section, birthrate being low means that the cost of living in a country is high, hmm, oh well i guess you lot dont know what's "high cost of living" anyway..
The screenshots of those cheating sites are the best-looking instances of Japanese web design I've ever seen
priorities lmao
Cheating in Japan and Politics on the West, two fields equal in dignity and honesty receiving the best web design their countries can make
I was married for 10 years to a Japanese woman. We had four children. I did everything and took care of the kids and worked full time. She cheated and got the kids. I lost everything. I was there for the kids. I was there for family. Sometimes people just think the grass is greener on the other side. 「隣の芝生は青い」って感じかな。叱ったないで皆言うられる。。。それの後で国に帰って方が良いんじゃない。絶対無理です。子供が成長するとき、僕が捨てたと思わせたく無いじゃん。私は日本への移民として国を去りました、そして人々は私に家に帰るように言います、信じられないです。 私の家族は移民でした。
You know well it won't last with that other dude. Once he will empty his balls, he will seek another chick. So your ex wife will be alone again. And older. And you, you will pick up a younger chick.
I am so sorry for you.
This should be a warning to all the foreign men obsessed with Japanese women.
So basically communication is a universal key in any relationship.
When you fall in love with the good side of a person, be prepared to accept their bad side as well.
None of us are perfect.
Yh but the lack of communication in relationship in the west is different to Japan. I was so surprised when the man in the video said couples talking about sex is awkward like y’all are couples 😭 in the west the lack of communication is more like small things while in Japanese rut more like fool on shynesses or blatant indirectness but that is their culture. I think this awkwardness being in the couple is probably because the men work long ours so never get to interact and break the ice with the woman. It’ll literally be like being in a relationship with an acquaintance :(
So to basically sum this all up, communication is the name of the game boys and girls. If you don't communicate, and you don't spend any time together, I think it's very easy to see why you'd drift apart from someone, even your spouse. A lot of these issues are perpetuated by Japan's toxic (but changing for the better) work culture as well as the need to hide your true feelings (honne) and basically sugar coat everything that you say (tatemae).
I personally don't think you should ever be afraid to tell your spouse or significant other your true feelings as it isn't healthy for the relationship and generally prevents you from forming a true connection.
i have a simple theory, if you and your gf/bf dont talk about each other's fetish on your 3rd date, then dont even think about marriage
Oh Lord of RUclips. bless this man for his based takes, his ability to filter out the root of issues and knack to summarize concisely
Amen
the main thing that keeps men and women together is great sex not communication...if the communication is lousy and the sex always fantastic they will stay together...it's pretty basic sweaty stinky stuff
Very informative..I was married to a Japanese woman and was ultimately cheated on which destroyed the marriage.
No amount of discussion could solve the problem..she just wouldn’t be honest about her feelings..
Thanks for your commentary.
I have worked with Japanese engineers for months and I could not question their dedication to solve the issues at hand. But I always question why they need to spend extra hours in the office, even without doing anything. They still think ‘long hours = hard work’ and never effectively consider Productivity and Efficiency: they do fall asleep in the middle of meetings, and this could even be weirdly considered admirable as a sign of hard work; or spend breaks smoking or drinking coffee to fight sleepiness. I think this is one of the factors why Japan is fast losing its advantage on technology (e.g. Samsung > Sony or Panasonic) or economic strength (china > Japan).
I was also wondering how they could make their wives happy on all aspects with them actually being corporate slaves.
They spent overtime to absorb more unhealthy positive ions from the office.
It's true that endless hours doesn't equate to higher productivity. During sleep, toxins are cleared from the brain (saw this on Pindex.) Not enough sleep: brain doesn't work as well.
@homma 40 True or not- but unless there is a scientific data that shows a high correlation between ‘hardworking’ and ‘cheating index’, then it may not be a good conclusion, especially since another variability is introduced (Japan and Brazil- with their own unique culture, work ethics, morals, etc.,..).
@@homma409 you actually make a really good point. In my country also, the working hours are pretty tame. But the cheating stats are insanely high probably as high as Brazil's but less than Japan.
There are more complex factors at play here than what meets the eye. I suppose first and foremost it's the culture that determines how much people cheat. Cheating stats among Muslims and Indian Christians are very low. And they work really long hours. But I know their cultures are extremely family-oriented and anti-cheating.
Welcome to Asia,.... the greatest wasters of office time I've ever seen. When your day starts off with changing into a sweater, putting your slippers on, and drinking a large cup of coffee (green tea in China), then commence to looking out the window,.......YOU KNOW IT'S GONNA BE A PRODUCTIVE DAY ! .....OH, LUNCH TIME ALREADY !!!
After studying Japanese culture and Japanese for many years, as much as I respect many aspects of it, I do hope that being more direct about what you want or need-especially in romantic partnerships-becomes normalized in the culture soon. It must be so hard to be in a relationship otherwise…
That would require a major shift in the culture and how Japanese communicate in general. Directness is not something Japanese people, in general, are known for doing. That'll take generations realistically, although there are always individual exceptions.
Anna, I've been around Japanese culture in San Jose and it amazes me how the sushi chef harassed the waitresses. Sad.
@@danielwilliams2735 Care to expand on "harassed"?
@@kabysummit5801 the sushi chef was behaving aggressively to the two waitresses wearing boxes on their backs. I was rather shocked by his demeanor. The girls weren't here in San Jose for long as they scurried about. Sad.
Now baby, what can we do as a group to get the porn actresses out of Japan that aren't happy?
@@danielwilliams2735 I think the sushi chefs are ornery thinking too highly of themselves.
As to porn actresses, what's the point about getting them out of their own country? The equivalents in the US have high suicide rates. Grass is not greener here.
Nobita is tired of the comments and DM's about people fantasizing Japanese women lol. Great video on saying stop it lol!
Bro have you seen swingers and cucks? If anything this sounds like paradise to some
@@darkreaper4990 Hello. May I have the link to the japanese learning subreddit? I am learning the language too.
@@darkreaper4990 To be fair, Japanese people often do the same thing with foreigners. Seen tons of examples of Japanese women who only get together with foreign men in order to improve their English or because they have a pre conceived image of western men. And also Japanese men who get together with western women for their "exotic" beauty. So let's not act like it's a one way thing.
@@darkreaper4990 You assume all this from one comment? Good god.
@@darkreaper4990 I can tell getting into a discussion with you would be like talking to a brick wall. So I'll leave it there.
What I got from this video is that you should date neither a Japanese man or woman. Communication is one of the foundation and building blocks of any relationship. Without it, you're doomed from the start. Japan seems like such a sad and lonely place to be. I feel sorry for them. Imagine not wanting to go home after work because you want to avoid your *family*!
I wouldn’t generalise an entire nation based on some patterns.
I’ve been happily married to a Japanese woman for 20 years. She is the most direct and communicative person I know :)
Don’t date a nationality, date a person and you’ll be fine!
(Edit: you’ll be fine most of the time, lol).
@@StrategySphere Wouldn't say it's as easy as "date a person and you'll be fine", but indeed generalizing an entire nation is usually a bad idea.
It's hard to find non xenophobic Japanese person anyway lol
@@syasyaishavingfun To be fair, he likely is Caucasian, the more acceptable exception. Might still be frowned upon, but far more acceptable if dark skin tones because of beauty standards.
Sometimes men need personal space, why men like hobbies. If working so many hours, cafe becomes a hobby to collect your mind And soul
there is many similarities between Japanese work culture and where I work, long hours and team culture, nobody wants to be the first to leave even if you are done and not doing anything. Also, going home to the family can be stressful also. Marriage can become sexless after kids and coming home is more like coming home to roommates rather than loving family, so cheating is only way to release sexual needs
Understandable, albeit a lousy excuse to justify what's essentially wrong with the world today: people want the glorious wedding day, the wonder of their children's birth; but when the crunch comes that they need to be responsible and realise they chose the life they're in, they immediately start blaming everyone except for themselves. Bills need paying, mouths need feeding, clothes and so on, thus you work to pay for it; that's the way of the world and when you're home, you be the parent, you be the partner and you do it without complaint and certainly don't go throwing it away just because of a spat or a dry spell.
There is never a good enough reason to cheat: for men or for women. Disregarding vows like the ones made in marriage is as immature as a child who can't keep a promise and never is expected to do so.
Sounds like somebody is rationalizing their disloyalty lol.
@@firstandforemost87 Or explaining why they are cheating in the first place.
"Needs" you mean desires
@@killertruth186 making excuses more like.
It’s a sad thing to be cheated on. In America, it’s a very big problem when it comes to relationships and marriage as I’m sure it’s a problem worldwide as well. It’s one of several reasons why so many in America do the hookup culture which is so ubiquitous. Marriages are decreasing and some folks are just living together only instead of being married. Glad this is being covered by you Nobita.
Compared to other countries, America is actually pretty tame. 28% men and 24% women. Still a problem though
Law system will get involved and create laws for this kind of situations.
For example...
If you lived together with your sexual partner for a couple of years, the law will investigate and considerate that as "free marriage" so... Yeah married
Sad to say you’re right living together as roommates is the new norm now.
In America, if your spouse is cheating on you, you can just shoot them. And the kids too, if you want.
Don't forget about the sheeps who watch, Kim Kardashian in real housewives, just unnecessary... foolishness
I've lived in Japan for 5 years now. I once worked as a Newspaper delivery guy. We usually start work at midnight and deliver morning newspapers until 4 am. And let me tell you, there is a lot of degeneracy and cheating that I saw night after night. Married women who I thought were meek and respectful, were having sex at some young person's car in a parking lot at 2 am. Some guys dropping off a naked lady at her house by 3 am. It was absolutely a shock to me. I also knew some of my co-workers that time were doing quickies with married women during the afternoon deliveries. I relented, and I too became involved in an affair with my married teacher at the Tech College I attended. So yeah, sorry to burst some people's bubbles, Japanese women are far from being angels and definitely far from being loyal women. Some won't even hesitate for a moment and just go into absolute degeneracy if given the chance.. this is what their general loneliness do to them. It's kinda sad if you think about it.
What ? Sad ? It's even making me crying right now.
I'm scared when I know Japanese women are like that... 😭😭😭😭
Well like you said, they’re lonely. You just got to show them love and affection just like anybody else and communicate. They’re mostly cheating because they don’t get that love from home, be it physically or emotionally.
@@lelouchlamperouge3077 technically it's people/women everywhere😂😂 but aspects that are unique to Japan like loneliness and suppression of sexual desires causes some strange scenarios.
@@lelouchlamperouge3077 me too
" I also knew some of my co-workers that time were doing quickies with married women during the afternoon deliveries" sounds like it came straight out of hentais lmao
You hit the nail on the head, Nobita: if you don't change the culture first, legislation is not going to change a thing. As long as Japanese women feel that men that don't work themselves to the bone are useless, and even men themselves stop think it, you guys are screwd. It has to be talked about on the media and other places. Family is paramount, expending time with your love ones is paramount and (and this connect with one of your videos) mental health is paramount. All these three things are of the upmost importance and strictly connected. People function better when they feel loved and appreciated.
Legislation changes peoples behaviors. The welfare state destroyed families in america, marrying women to the govt instead of their children's father
Very ironic how some people manage to cheat whilst many others cant even get a relationship.
Welcome to the club! After seeing this video, I'm now thinking of moving to Japan and remain a single man, while providing a lot of love and attention that so many Japanese women are craving for. Hell, maybe I could even teach them how to communicate better with their spouses and boyfriends! Wanna come along for the adventure? 😂
@@kauaimu Sexually frustrated fox! Hi there.
I think it's because sex in our era is more important than everything else combined. Both men and women are getting bombarded with sex related material constantly. What do you think it's going to happen ?
That Relationship Therapist on the video certainly seems to suggest this too. Men and women are built for cheating, apparently. What a perfect example of the modern mindset.
s3x...rihhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhht the ultimate form of intimacy is more important than everything else combined. It IS everything IN COMBINED. It's hugging, touching, looking into one's eyes, all of it. What's disappeared is the NEED FOR MEANINGFUL S3X. Plenty of authors in the past 6 years wrote about this issue. It's just now people want to have what in their closet or refrigerator. That's all that's really changed which makes traditional s3x look OUTDATED or vanilla. That's all. Trust that people want more the oreos, then the talenti moroccan pecan chip then sandwich with all the trimmings. Then the teryaki salad and rose' or mimosa of S#X. All of the variety in between. That's all. And there's nothing wrong with that just have to make up their mind. Do you want that kind of food everyday or just once in a while or you want to steer clear of it because it's too addictive and can make you gain weight. It's a food metaphor for s3x.
It's more important than ever because people are having less sex than ever before so the desire is at an all time high.
It is not even about sex. It is a demeaning of sex. It is lust. This pornographic culture we live in kills love. It takes something beautiful, sacred, even, and turns it into a pastime.
no matter u a women or a man , if you are a DECENT person , just end the relationship instead of lying and cheating on your partner.
Many UNDECENT ppl lives on this earth, haha
they want some secret excitements while not trying to end their relationships.
@@t.y3750 yes and that is wrong
Anyone married reading this, please take some time to thank your spouse for all that they do. It'll help your marriage more than you realize.
Please don't talk like a wuss. Ok Ok..OK... thank you sir
"I didn't feel being loved" This part and many others make it seem to me that women don't actually cheat for the same reasons as men overall (as opposed to what one of the first person talking was saying). Not to "spread their seeds" (how would women do that, I assume she meant "for purely sexual desire"), but to feel a connection with someone. While at the same time pushing away their husband if they come early (according to those accounts here) which is quite paradoxal.
Women don't cheat for noble reasons...they're selfish..disloyal.
no way to justify it.
@@TheSanityMachine33 I didn't want to justify it or say it's better.
Just that it's often "different", in average. Imho.
You got to remember, that is what they're saying. But as they have showed being prone to cheating, how can we trust their word?
I heard that it's pretty common for men in Japan to use brothels ("heath" businesses, soapland, compensated dating etc) over there. How does that tie into all this? Would they consider that cheating? That would qualify as cheating to me.
Edit: typo
It's not really considered cheating as many people say "Feelings are not involved", but yeah, I think it is cheating
Men here. To me thats cheating but i heard for japanese that doesnt. Pretty crazy if you ask me
@@TheJapanReporter Thanks for replying!
Well my next question would be...
What if women were using "health" services just as frequently as men and it was just as accepted in society? Do you think there would be as many relationship issues as there are now?
I mean at firts it kinda seems me pretty out of place, but i came to the realization of why they see it like that, and i think its cames with the culture differences and persception with an contrast between western people and asian. I dont wanna defend them or being againts but instead trying to undertand from where it came that way of thinking which if you give a little of thinking it kinda make sense from their point of view.
So they emotionally divorced?
Seems to me the cultural indirectness is the root cause of many of these issues. If you can't honestly communicate, what can you do really?
Communication is the key in the relationship, couple fight are good so they can understand each other.
it(cultural indirectness) ran up against the 21st and 22nd century and lost big time. Can't compete with what is coming neither wait til that web 5.0 is here. You think 2 people sit on the couch and text other people now. Wait til web 5.0 is at the door. You'll see your gf/bf wife or husband very little then now to the point it won't be a point.
@@liteasura6111 Most people prefer to break up after getting into fights. Which is idiotic.
NTR is canon to Japan's current day lore.
lmao
Exactly what I was thinking
What's the chance that NTR hentai is just japanese way of coping real life NTR?
Dealt with two cheating J wives 1st in Fukuoka, 2nd Ozone Nagoya - not surprising J wives have a lot of time on their hands, JAV is freely available with one of the most popular categories is the Married woman having an affair.
Japanese women cheat and spend their husbands' money at cafes gossiping with their friends
I think one of the biggest reason why women cheat in Japan is because they don't love the person in the first place. Women don't marry someone they love here in Japan. They marry because the guy earns big money or has the potential to earn big money and they ignore the other bad stuff the guy have. One of the category I always hear from some good looking women is he must earn 10 million yen a year. They don't marry cuz of love but marry because of money. That's why when a Japanese and a non Japanese have a child it's automatically called "Ai no ko" or love child. When I heard that I immediately think "wait aren't all japanese children made with love?". And that's kinda sad
True .
I used to have a strong interest in meeting a Japanese lady. But not anymore.
Japanese husbands and wives should get drunk together more, encouraged by friends, then blurt out their thoughts to each other ! Lol
They should get high
So, if a man cheats it is his fault and if his woman cheats it is still his fault. bruh!
Welcome to the modern world. Everything is a man's fault.
You hit the nail on the head Nobita about confidence and the lack there of.
cherry picking lol
The annoying thing is that while these are valid reasons, the actions don't match the statements. The pandemic has shown how if a man does spend more time at home that tensions are often worse.
Communication is key, but it will likely not solve this issue alone. I feel sorry for the Japanese because their culture does not incentivize healthy relationships and even profits off unhealthy ones.
Hopefully people won't delude themselves into thinking these are acceptable reasons to cheat and instead work on the underlying issues instead. It's harder than cheating and may not bear fruit in the end, but nothing worthwhile in life is easy.
Yup, Japan doesnt incentive healthy relationships since they're children, i mean, they barely hug their kids. Imagine what can come from that lack of closeness on an early age.
@@ShonenBeats I had an Asian classmate in college and he would remark how cold his parents are to him compared to American parents, specifically Latinos (I'm Latino). They'd barely hug him or even say they love him.
@@JohnDoe-pt7ru Lol deadass. i'm Asian-American and lowkey I thought my parents hated me for like 18 years because they never showed affection like the American families I see on TV. Then I realized that they do love me (and they love me lots)-- they just show it in a veryyy different way. ,I'd imagine a lot of Asian societies are like this but unfortunately it can lead to confusion and misunderstandings. Such as in the case of a relationship-- for most people, if you're not actively communicating that you love/support them, then they'll take it as you're being cold.
I used to go to Japan for 15 years.
I had several contacts with Japanese women, as a lover, as a friend or just as a pen pal... what I learned is most of them are superficial, lazy and not reliable, at least until they're 40. It's like they're teenager until 40. I definitely agree when you say they are not the angel that foreigners used to think.
Medias always say that men are the problem but I found that women have their responsibilities too. How can you have a good family with such women.
But nowadays, I think it's not only in Japan.
it's because of hypergamy and the delusion of age is just a number until they realize 'oh sh......I am aging' i better get me a serious relationship because they realize they won't be young forever.
Honestly that's women everywhere. I think modern culture has been so infected with feminism that across the globe women are just abandoning traditional values and roles then when they hit the older years, they realize they fucked up but it's too late.
agreed. Japanese women are soooo lazy. They don't want to work just pop out kids and stay at cafes all day with other moms spending their husbands money.
I will say the best ones move out of Japan. Sadly only available for European men or rich streamers
I always tell people that Japan is what the US is heading towards over the next 5-10 years. Japan had its rise of feminism before the US and is still suffering the consequences. Hypergamy, hypersexualization, lack of commitment, etc.
Not only you kept making better videos throughout the years but it became a therapy for my trauma with my Japanese ex
Shouldn't they be loyal to each other? Also as adults they should resist their desire. Somehow this makes me think that they are like child in mind yet grown up in body
Well said, I would only add that there is an equal need for honest communication and appreciation of the other.
I read that there is so much academic pressure on Japanese, especially boys, that they don't really have much childhood, so when they become adults, they kind of go wild as much as they can. But if they get married before getting this out of their system, they go wild and "play" as adults. Adults often play through sex. Also, many people in Japan get married because of familial or societal pressure, not because they fall in love, so the marriage becomes more of a contract, missing emotion.
With all due respect, why should any deny their happiness? Why live in silent misery?
The solution is not cheating but both need communicate their views and needs, before marriage, for compatibility. Once married, be honest, fix the problem or divorce and move on.
Another reason why many Asian women outside of asia refer non Asian men. Those men are more open with their emotions.
@@KC-bv9kf Asian women like non Asian men? That’s news to me. Out of all races of women, aren’t they the most loyal to their men regardless?
@@TheIshmael98 loyalty is dependent the individual and his/her relationship. No one wants to live in misery.
It's a cultural thing. Japanese really dedicate their lives to work. Until Karoshi!!! Things will change the next generation.
Tu dia... Idola di mana-mana 😂
I knew a guy here in Japan who's ex-wife was an alcoholic and completely neglected the children. On top of this, the guy was an older business owner from the UK; however, he still lost the custody battle.
@@wixoss9893 no
@@wixoss9893 no
@@wixoss9893 stupid. Who paid for their finances. if not for him both mother and children would've starved to death.
That's not a japanese thing. Women in generall cheat more often while younger. Men tend to cheat when they get 50+ but that's still rare compared to women.
So according to this video my chances of being cheated are 50% omg I can't feel more sad for the poor Japanese women and men who can't find true love and internal soul peace. I feel like I want to help and give assistance, I knew what was feeling empty and rotten because of not finding the true love.
Create an app that talks about their culture but centers around not only the things that make interaction between men and women center but also helps them with their intimacy. Then onboard a young person to help with marketing to young couples. Simple and done. if you take this idea and it takes off just see a man with great vision from the future helped me create this concept. I'll be watching somewhere and will know it was you who read my comment. I'll laugh while on my catamaran in the middle of the ocean while eating mint chocolate chip ice cream. Be well.
#MGTOW is the only way for men. Safety, stability and happiness is always preferrable than any woman.
Marriage sounds miserable in general, but in Japan it sounds bloody awful. Why would anyone marry? Small wonder the birthrate is declining.
This makes so much sense, I've been watching Japanese movies lately and 90% of the time, there's cheating by either both parties or the woman. It's shocking and sad . This video explains why it is the way it is which is still sad but if the Japanese society realises what the issue is then they can work towards solving it. No one wants to or should live like that
304’s around the World 🌏
Based
Facts fam, it's a pandemic!
Still better than American chicks. At least these ones look good lol.
This is a wonderful channel that I just found and am already fascinated. I visited Japan a few years ago for a holiday and it was an amazing experience. This is a great way to keep in touch with an intriguing culture while looking forward to the next travel opportunity. Thank you…..🤝
Percentage who have cheated in Japan:
Women: 44%
Men: 40%
It's not really looking that good for anybody.
Kudos to the 56% of Japanese women and the 60% of Japanese men who never have cheated.
Those numbers are very low. Remember those are who admitted it. Many will lie or not consider something cheating because of several reasons ("it was just a fling" etc)
@@JohnDoe-pt7ru Yes, I'd assume the true numbers are much higher.
@@JohnDoe-pt7ru
Yeah, you're right. Honesty is the best policy. Just because someone says they've never cheated doesn't make it true.
I think, as a species, we need to renew our commitment to marriage as an ideal. We need to value it, and be willing to sacrifice for it, and be willing to uphold it, and be willing to guard it more than we might a very expensive car, or even a very expensive house, or even a very high paying job, because, let's admit it:
A good quality marriage is worth far more than the best car, the most expensive house, and the highest paying job, because there's no faster way to misery than a failed marriage, no matter how great your car, house or job is.
@@thecommenter9267
I stand corrected. I think we all just grew complement. We took marriage for granted, to our own harm.
We were ignorant. We were foolish, like little children, not knowing what we were doing, because we lacked maturity and situation awareness.
Consider the fact that women also lie and hide these things many times as compared to men
So many of those points overlap and build off each other, I could see how something as simple as continuing date nights into marriage could address all of those points. If a husband is willing to take some time off work for date nights (#1), it show that he values time with his wife and builds her confidence (#4) and encourages honest communication (including #6). That communication leads to resolutions about those issues (#2) and reduces the need to find fulfillment outside of the marriage (#5) or the need to seek a divorce (#3).
Am I saying this is foolproof and guaranteed to work? No, but it is better than doing the same thing and expecting better results. And just like trying to improver your own physical health, making an intentional positive change can have some results, then you can then start working on other necessary changes to further improve your results until you are back in a healthy state.
Personally, I find it frustrating, as a man who has been single for many years, to see married men just let their marriages decay, especially when a little effort (and a little growing up in a particular case) would not have lead to cheating or divorce.
Wow your amazing u understand what makes a good marriage:)
I’m surprised your not married?
More men should follow your lead.
Keep enlightening others this is your calling.🙏👍
Well if you get married you'll definitely get cheated on with that type of thinking. Women will cheat and what you do is irrelevant no matter how much effort you put in it to work.
@@prasadpatil1160 I admit that my plan isn't foolproof or perfect but a better solution would need to be more specific to the couple and their particular problems.
If there is any detail that I probably missed, it is that there needs to be commitment on both sides. The challenges that life throws at us can lead to waning commitment. That is why effort is put into the relationship before it gets to a crisis, safeguards are put in place before a temptation is encountered, so that the commitment is reinforced in both. As long as the wife is not invested into the relationship and safeguarding against temptations, the husband’s efforts are in vain.
I know two couples who divorced because the wife’s high school sweetheart came back into the picture and she gave up on her husband. It was not that their husbands’ efforts were insufficient, but they both gave into the temptation of “what could have been” and divorced their husbands to pursue that old flame. That said, I’ve known other couples who have not had that problem, they have had an old sweetheart come back into the picture and stayed with their spouse. They never even let themselves entertain the temptation because they were committed to the point of not letting an ex become a wedge between them.
If you are fatalistic, thinking that "Women will cheat and what you do is irrelevant...", how could you ever build a trusting relationship? How could you fully commit to someone you anticipate will betray you? How could a woman commit to you if she thought you were going cheat no matter what she does for you? If you want to keep thinking that way, go ahead but don’t think your pessimism means that you are more enlightened.
Japanese: I'm unsatisfied so I'm going to have sex with a stranger, destroy my family, scar my child, push my spouse towards depression and suicide while also contributing to the collapse of the society.
Me: Why don't you just talk to your spouse about the issues?
Japanese: That would be awkward!
When physical attraction disappears, rarely does any amount of talking bring it back. Not excusing cheating - of course that's shitty, but just saying it's not a matter of simply "talking"
@@thecommenter9267 They specifically mention that in the video hence my comment. Also, physical attraction always disappears because we all inevitably age out of attractiveness. You think your spouse is gonna be hot at 50, 60, 70+ you're a lemming.
@@gjg5789 I completely agree that physical attraction disappears eventually. I just don't think communication is some kind of magic cure to bring a relationship back to life. Is it better than not having it? Sure. But I think it's more important to understand that at a certain point your relationship will turn from one based on lust to one based on compassion and to accept that for what it is. Rather than trying to keep the lust fire alive by "communicating"
@@thecommenter9267 You're wrong. Talking is EVERYTHING. Once you put someone in a state of hypnosis the sky is the limit. That's how I acquired my seven wives as an exceedingly ugly and poor male.
@@gjg5789 That's great, but ask yourself this. Why did 6 out of 7 wives end up leaving you? If you really did have 7 wives, that means that you never even went past the lust stage with any of them, so how would you even know the impact of communication once your lust dies? You wouldn't because your relationships have all been based on lust.
Unfortunately, people seems to be take advantage of this situation rather than try to help fix it...This & reasons No.6 could be the key to the whole problem I guess.
If I have a husband someday, I will give him a hug everytime he's coming home from work & that's for the least!
If this doesn’t change and men are taught to communicate with women, your birth rate will decline. Plus loyalty is a must or your men will resent all women and go outside the country to find a better one.
true
Nobita, noticed a change in your style, looking slick. Keep it up brother.
If he is a bad man, why did she marry him? There No good reason to cheat. Say goodbye, then fuck someone else. Be sure before getting married, cause it's a lifetime contract.
End of the story, so tired to hear excuses...
Thanks for the language
I need to do research projects for school and then I see the amount of extensive research Nobita does for his videos. Damn. Well done
From what I hear from other interview channels men are really distant, even before working, not even being interested that much in dating
Thank you Nobita. Enjoyed you profound analysis of this somehow difficult topic. Thank you also for tackling all these difficult issues in Japan in your videos. 👍👍👍
I agree with everything you said Nobita. The woman who said it’s women’s desire is to spread her seed is very reductionist. Yes some women want to have lots of children, but what they crave most is security. When you want to have a family you need a stable relationship and income. Which gives stability. The problem it seems is that Japanese couples seem to jump into marriage due to societal pressure. They don’t get to really know one another and jump in during the honeymoon phase when you see the person with rose colored glasses. I do admire those who want to date someone with the intentions of marriage, but if you don’t know your partner enough and you don’t communicate then how could you possibly want to start a family with this person if you can’t even be honest about your thoughts and feelings. Especially if you have insecurities you need to pipe up people aren’t mind readers. Also don’t ever think you fully know someone people are constantly changing and you might learn something new about the person you love.
Women claim to want security yet go out and mess up the marriage, which is the opposite of security and stability.
If that woman lives in a 1st world country and all of the things you listed are taken care of by the states, then what?
I hate cheating. Once a cheater, always a cheater. I'm a faithful guy and pretty old fashioned so I don't believe in second chances, once trust is broken it can never be returned.
Thank you for the very nice video again, Nobita.
ありがとうございました。
Get up early, have a quick breakfast, trains, office cubicles, get drunk, go home at night. REPEAT.
Sorry this is not life.
Fatigue, stimulant, claustrophobia, mundane, depressant, exhaustion, REPEAT. What a life!
Why do people who aren't cut out for monogamous relationship enter marriage with a not-interested-in-poly person ?
So this is what happens when Komi san doesn't communicate
The way I see it, a lot of Japanese men are not romantic. They look cold or strict. And it could just be their upbringing or culture but some women are looking for romance or affection and someone to give them attention.,,which could be one of the reasons why they cheat. Communication and respect is so important in a relationship no matter how long you have been together.
Women cheat more than men...still men's fault lol
Women need to own up to being responsible. They're not children.
@@JohnDoe-pt7ru日本人女性は特に責任感がないと感じる
Honestly, I respect the values of working for a group and ensuring everyone’s success and well-being. However, I can not find it in me to respect how working more hours is more valued than producing results.
working more hours is an honor thing. It says to the boss etc., that you're willing to do everything for the company and whoever survives out of the bosses shortlist will reap the rewards and/or benefits of being included in the companies future plans. So that big project even if you weren't selected you still could get the seniority for things others couldnt' get seniority for which makes all the difference for how you are perceived by your peers, and other business types at other companies within your field or area of expertise. That's why you see that old salaryman with grey hair who's respected and you have no idea why(that's if you visited Japan before for or any heavily populated Asian district city because he 'out competed' everyone for his spot or he was a man of seniority where his peers died off and he was the only guy left who is still around to know how to run the business exactly in the way it was run decades ago and add to it with todays models. It's how things were done in Japan.
@@kangtheconquerortheninth3826 That’s a pretty interesting concept although it’s competitive. I can see how hours can show commitment and dedication. It’s kind of good because it puts value on the process.
Analogy: It’s like learning vs getting good grades. If I learn from a class and get good grades I will have grown from that experience. If I just get good grades, and my understanding is not up to par, then my results will falsely reflect my capabilities. Either way I have to get good grades but understanding is more important(well to me that is)
Despite all that, I think it’s impractical. It really puts people’s health at risk. Competing for seniority with hours worked as opposed age or results rubs me the wrong way.
I think I could better understand this way of thinking by actually improving my Japanese and talking to people, but until then, that’s what I think.
I’ve been thinking about this for a bit and understood that these values were in place because they had to be at one time. It was a matter of survival for teamwork like this to happen.
In modern times, most people in developed countries can eat and sleep comfortably. Many things have become convenient making survival easier. We have more options so this old model for developing a career is becoming a little obsolete.
I’m a young person and I’m not lazy. I just don’t want to work for nothing.
Nobita is good you try to protect your own people by making foreigners feel scared.
@Nobita from Japan 7:15 I'm not sure how you call this "less conflict'.... I would rank infidelity, divorce, custody battles, and suicide as some of the highest conflicts you can have
You make excellent videos, Mr. Nobita. Well-researched, well-presented, and very good journalism.
OK no. I am 52 years old an i have never cheated. So that stuff about all people cheat. No. That is a personality thing. You think you can get away with it and that is why you cheat. When you understand that it is wrong and not accepted. THEN you realize cheating is wrong. An wont do it. You make it clear Cheating is wrong and people wont do it.
Modern day intimate relationships usually just boils down to finger pointing, anyway. I’ｍ going to focus on my own career success instead.
Yeah, people will make fun of me for being “single” or virgin, but when I die I want to die with my own objectives fufilled, and it does not include dating.
There's is indeed a lot of Asian women fetish in the West where they're seen as the perfect Trad wives, especially Japanese women. Getting married and having kids needs to be less of a social status and more of a personal development goal. There is a social pressure in more traditional societies to get married and have kids, which is toxic as hell. Not everyone can be a good parent or spouse. The fact that so many men would rather loaf around then spend time with their families is sad.
I'm optimistic though, Japanese will not change as quickly as other countries will, but they fact they are trying to implement policies to soften the work culture is a sign that some people want to fix these situations.
2:11 that's just ignoring the problem, if you didn't want a wife so you get married and if you didn't want a partner so you have a relationship *a relationship means committing to a person as equals and solving things together*
simpler if you just stay alone. The one who doesn't go home will only end up affecting you in the end. both physically and mentally because you would be as if you were working overtime without physical rest.
It is unfortunate that Japanese men take their life after losing their wife and child, it doesn’t change in the US but at lease we have groups to help each other
This is why Gyarus are the ideal date partners in Japan. They're not the normal type of Japanese women.
gyarus are way crazier and worse
They are way too loud. I used to be loud too but I could never be that loud. Shame. They seem like they have great personalities. If only they had a sound button.
@@troublemakers9760 but they are sincere, other women will act like subbmissive house wife and cheat on you at your back, maybe they are so sick of acting like house wife all the time and satfisy their hidden desires by cheating? Gyraus arent traditional but they fullfill their desires so they can stay loyal to someone. Also why would u want a robot instead of a funny, different, strong willed girl?
@@esra3387 Because most men are attracted to feminine characteristics. Loud and overly independent are not what most men look for. Don't hate the players, hate the game.
@@thecommenter9267 Why would i hate this? Hate is strong wrong. I just don't care not hate. I just wanted to warm guys because their submissive waifu are likely cheat on them at their back when they are away. Also they are boring as hell af. The video is about this topic, and if u ask me, im not loud nor submissive, i'm just i.
Hi Nobita, Im from Puerto Rico I enjoy your channel very much and admire the good things of Japanese culture.
It is really sad and depresing to be honest, by the long working hours, cheating apps, the hentai culture, the wife being alone for long time and not feeling loved, host clubs and the red district can affect marriage, breack families and cause lonliness, I hope there still good men and women in Japan who are willing to be good partners and be loyal.
But this happens all around the globe, here in the west things like social media and dating apps like Tinder are destroying marriages and relationships, it is a reality that wee need to face
But there are Good Man and Good Women out there wee just need to know how choose well and be self-aware from the type of person who can be by are side.
I knew it !! two my Japanese friends who came to London with their GFs ... yeah got cheated with some local London Lads. 😌🙃
Women are subservient to men in Japan. Every man is given respect whether he's dealing with his own wife or girlfriend,or someone else's. They rarely talk back and never turn in a man for anything he may do. In that society, you're always looking to "move up", the men know this all too well.
this is nobitas favorite topic but my favorite thing is watching nobita talk about cheating!
point three is sadly a universal thing men have no rights in the family court
God thank you for these amazing topic it really open my eyes.
The fact is jack of all trades cannot defeat specialist. Meaning role of husband in marriage as partner, father, spouse, friend, head of family etc. Therefore women cheat to get the special role from other men and it's not all about sex, they can cheat for affection, money, mental health etc that they can get from the husband.
I am a foreigner living in Japan for past 2 years, and honestly, it gets hard for me to know any 'dark reality ' of Japan because of lack of communication in my work place as well as from friends who don't connect well or share their true feelings.
Your videos are great, Mr. Nobita, and brought light to many observations I had that made me wonder why Japanese women (some are close friends), with amazing beauty, feel insecure. It's unfortunate. I wish the women to feel empowered in Japan.
Honestly, Japanese people have massive communication problems in general. The entire culture is steeped in it.
The path to a happy relationship requires open and honest communication. But good luck trying to get a Japanese person to open up about their true feelings and wants.
Really interesting video, but I strongly disagree with the reasons given that japanese women cheat related to insecurity and not feeling loved. Women just don't take accountability, no matter what country you're in. If the woman cheats, it's the man's fault. If a man cheats, it's also the man's fault. It's BS. Women need to take accountability for their own behavior and stop blaming others.
ikr, the double standards is bs
I disagree with your assessment, you paint a very ignorant and narrow-minded opinion about women, not all women who cheat are like that and certainly not all women in general are like that. And alot of the times it IS the men's fault, don't pretend like men are innocent, many of them are not and have done horrible things that causes some women to cheat, more often than not it's because the men were already cheating on their wives or they were abusive towards their wives, thus leading the wives to cheat on them and find comfort in other people. And there are many men who also never take responsibility for their own actions and always blaming women for everything. Of course not all men are cheating and abusive assholes who don't take responsibility for their own actions, some men are good. And likewise not all women are cheaters who blame men for everything, there are many good women who are loyal too and take responsibility for their own actions.
@@iamlinda100 No one can cause a person to cheat. You cheat because u what to. It’s call your own free will. 🤷♀️
@@AlwaysHope_ true
@@AlwaysHope_ fact
BRUTAL blackpill, and they'll treat themselves like victims too
Goldenpill - Drink gold, live long.
It's crazy because marriage is messed up in the USA too. People get married for the wrong reasons, toxic relationships, etc. I have seen some crazy stories both personal and online.
Because it's the thrill of getting caught the men there aren't putting in enough work leaving the women unsatisfied and searching for more
what a pos, imagine betraying someone who provides for you who you supposedly love, for "the thrill of it" like what kind of soulless animal do you have to be? I like how you say its the men's fault the women cheat, as if women have no responsibility or something. Yeah they are distant because they actually work, to provide for them. The fact that people like you think this is a justified reaction, rather than breaking up, tells me how narcissistic and completely inhuman people are. Maybe if you don't think your partner is doing enough break up with them instead of being a human leech.
Imagine being such an animalistic creature, that you cheat "because of the thrill" less than human, sad that people with that mindset are living in the world, if you feel that way I hope you become a human windchime.2
Cope
Hearing a Japanese person say sugar daddy/sugar mommy is insane to me, wow..... Japan is crazy for their wild juxtaposition of the perception of Japan versus the of the dark stuff happening in the under tone
It's not only Japanese women but all women's are same we just don't know yet because some do openly and some do secretly
Yup. Not japanese women but other women in different countries
So the likelihood that is that you're going to be cheated on then she should not be shocked when It happens to her..
Thanks again for the worthwhile video!😊
(7:39) Interesting, it appears that Japenese men learn about sex from porn. The mom does not give her son the "talk."
Japan needs to fix their work culture. That thing causes so many problems there.
japanese work culture is exactly the reason why i'm telling my Japanese gf to come live with me in Belgium instead of me living in japan. I'd rather work to live instead of living to work.
That's weird to me, when I have that perspection of japanese women to be nice and respectful
You have been watching too much anime then
@@mobious01 I actually have some Japanese family now... That's why...
Good manners does not necessarily lead to good actions.
In the West, if our divorce rate was 15%, we would probably cheat more, too? Divorce, alimony, and child support just aren’t as practical/available in Japan as in the U.S.
For real. In the USA, people cheated more as well. japan not available have divorce, alimony, and child support like the US.
In my view there's no good reason for cheating, Either you fix the relationship or you leave it, Either you step up or you step out.
I always step up, It can be time consuming, It can take alot of effort and be emotionally damaging, But that's what relationships are, That's what Love is. If it's worth it to you, You'll do anything to keep your partner. If it's true love, It's always worth it to you. My motto is True love or no love.
Wait, why is cheating so common in Japan in the first place? Those percentages scared me.
I definitely think it's the work culture to blame.
I think Japanese men just don't admit that often.
Cope