Julien Baker - "Appointments" (Official Video)
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- Опубликовано: 9 фев 2025
- From the new album 'Turn Out the Lights' available now: mat-r.co/TurnOu...
julienbaker.com
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Director: Sophia Peer
Director of Photography: Adam Uhl
Assistant Director: Morgan Jon Fox
2nd Assistant Director: Ryan Azada
Art Director: Dustin Brantley
Choreographer: Christina McKinney
Steadicam Operator: Megan Masur
Assistant Camera: Breezy Lucia
Gaffer: Ted Goble
Grip: Robert Rowen
Editor: Matt Posey
Colorist: Robert Wagnerman | Haym Pictures
Executive Producer: Chad Ostrom
Production Company: Penelope Studios
Producer: Rachael Morrison
Production Assistants: Kyungchan Min and Alex Panaro
Dancers: Rachael Arnwine, Stephanie Mei Hom, Christina McKinney, Jill Guyton Nee and Ashley Volner
Starring: Doug Ammons, Justin Birmann, Wally Ford, Matt Gilliam, Rita Hutchings, Happi Johnson, Brian Wicker and Tori Williams
Special Thanks: Fred & Debra Gilliam and Heather Brown
Matador Records on the web:
www.matadorreco...
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Julien is the tiniest gentle giant that ever lived. And I love her for that
I’ve been watching many of juliens interviews and listening to her music and it makes so much sense why phoebe would write the line “whatever she wants me to do, I will do”
Can you say something more about it? I've been really curious why Phoebe has this line in her song and what can it mean
@@Ursorion I can only speak on what I've interpreted. As we know Phoebe and Julien are really good friends, and it's clear that Julien is a very genuine and kind soul who endured a lot of hardship in her life, and came out on top. I guess Phoebe wrote that to sort of cement the idea that no matter what, she will always be there to support and love Julien unconditionally
@@sarah-dl3wt ah, this way. thank you for answering. I can agree. I see many people coming to the comment section and write something like "whatever she wants" and I know it's from Graceland Too, but I always saw it like "she is that great that she can do whatever she wants with her music and it'll turn out amazing" but here, with a full line of the song it shows that it's more about a friendship of theirs and supporting each other no matter what. Thanks once again for clearing this out for me.
whatever she wants..
This really captures how it feels to be struggling with your mental health on a daily basis and just go through the motions. So beautiful.
it also captures what it feels like to live with someone who thinks you're making excuses, failing on purpose, not even trying, and why can't you just be happy, you ungrateful selfish brat.....
I've experienced something new this past year... Tears streaming from my eyes while I I'm still doing all the things needing to be done. Cleaning, caring for the animals, driving for work, and so on. It feels awful. I can no longer afford to sit and cry anymore. If I don't stop moving then it will all bury me...
It really does. Just getting through the steps to make it through the day.
Realize im tall
Is the cumulative effect of 2 million of us watching this that we all feel that much better or that you’ve pointed out that we are depressed it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy?
“Maybe its all gonna turn out alright, and I know that it’s not, but I have to believe that it is”... hits my soul to the core
Me. June 2020
I friend of mine shared this video a few moments ago. I'm completely floored by your talent.
Also, the breath left my body when I realized at the beginning of the video was filmed in my very own house. We recently left it to move to New Hampshire, and as you know, we rent it out on Airbnb.
What you may not know, is that your video touched me so deeply. I'm a dancer. I've danced my whole life, and I owned a dance studio while I lived in that house. I miss my dance studio every day, and I miss my home there too. So to see someone bring art to life in those walls again, you have no idea what that did for me. Thank you.
That Home has seen immense grief, and incredible joy. My little girl was born there, the room we filmed in was where she spent her first hours of life. Both of my children took their first steps on those floors. I have choreographed many many dances in those rooms.
My students became my family, and they have spent countless hours rolling around on those floors, and every room has seen a while dance party or two (hundred).
Anyway, I just wanted to say thank you for sharing, and keep on creating. You never know when your art will save someone, even yourself, when it's needed the most.-Bing Osterman
Also sorry for all of the typos! I was shaking as I was typing!
Cool story bro
FLCL thankyou. That is exactly what I was thinking
Ok.
Is this a true story??
This tiny little person matters a whole lot. She's an awesome writer and performer
i am terribly tired and unable to do anything and down and ahhhhhhhhhhhh..... i just can't. thank you for making me smile today. this is enough to keep me going, i believe. i think i'll be alright now
geiko yes love this
As someone who struggles daily with ADHD, this song is literally what it feels like to experience it. Always failing at the simplest things, trying to get others to believe you are doing the best you can, only to be told that it's just another excuse. Missing appointments on accident and still disappointing others, even with the best of help and medications. You just learn to see any risk as another potential failure to your dreams but yet, nothing will change if you don't keep trying...
Keep trying.....❤
Yes I get that
"Maybe its all going to turn out alright. I know that its not but I have to believe that it is"
This is all of us while we have try to keep ourselves from drowning. This is me while I desperately try to scream and lie that Im going to be okay while deep down I know I would never will.
I love you Julien.
That sounds like something some emo kid would have written on their livejournal circa 2001
Brilliant........ touching lyrics from a truly talented artist......btw anyone hating on this young lady really needs to re-evaluate your life.....smh.
💙
"You don't have to remind me so much how I disappoint you". God damn. That one hurt lol
Being LGBT raised religious myself, a lot of Julien’s music appeals to me directly. I relate to her mental anguish as you question your faith and everything around you that you love. Her music is not only a powerful voice for those that don’t have one, it’s powerfully lyrical and her voice is phenomenal. I hope forward to more music from her.
I mean this is just good music in general. Anyone can relate to this lol
I’m with you there, Edsel.
Whats so traumatic about being lbgtq
@@haroldchristopher1760 a lot of things including the fact that in most countries it is illegal for us to exist and we have to live in hiding or we got to jail/something worse. Even in the U.S our rights are being threatened and taken away along with all the hate crimes happening. Not to mention how some people don't have supportive families and can be treated horribly for coming out or even kicked out of their house.
@@marsstruck I'm anti lbgtq and I stand on that but I disagree with people getting mistreated or killed because they wanna be that way
I've always interpreted the dancers as the "depression" that you can't completely escape, no matter how hard you try or how beautiful of a place you are in. They're always going to be there, you can't escape them, but you can deal with them.
Interesting interpretation. I was thinking: "curious--an unnecessary distraction..." But, you may be onto something; I'll consider this when I rewatch the video.
Julien is one of the rare artists who offer you everything they have.
Not that rare. Look around a little more.
Nope. Definitely not. It suggests that CardinalSessions is short-sighted.
"Look around" doesn't mean "go to the depths of Earth and back". There are tons and tons of artists who offer everything they have.
Except: punctuation, emotion, excitement, complexity.
Just another uninteresting "singer\songwriter".
At the expense of her well-being it seems. I would've loved to hear a more upbeat sound on this new record. I'm still recovering from Sprained Ankle.
What CardinalSessions meant to say is that Julien knows how to access her ugly emotions and present them to her audience better than just about anyone else. She really bares all on this album.
How she pictures everyone around her as dancing 😭
This is the most emotionally relatable song for my life rn
I’ve been to the hospital twice in the past 6 months for suicidal depressive reasons & that part about isolating yourself & people not wanting you but wanting what you once were hit me & then she says “I know you think I’m not trying”. I’ve been in therapy & talking about trying not to miss anymore appointments 😭
I’m sorry y’all,
I normally try to spread positivity but this song is a work of art that accurately depicts what’s been in my head & makes me feel less alone. Thank you for making this. You’re beautiful.
You're beautiful and you'll be OK ❤️
I'm addicted to sad songs and now Julien Baker. It's like icing on the cake.
Nothing is better than to fall asleep at night listening to Julien filling up my bedroom with her singing.
unbelievable in the most literal sense. The talent here needs a back breaking standing ovation. Honestly wtf
I don't think anyone else has managed to so perfectly put into words, what living with depression is like. this is incredible
Simply beautiful. One of my favorite artists. As a father of young daughters, it is amazing how much every one of her songs make me think of them and hope that they have a foundation to find hope in the situations that Julien sings about. I am always drawn to her hope. Powerful stuff. Thanks for sharing.
her music is so beautiful🥹🥹
I swear I get the chills every single time I hear her voice. I'm in love with Julien's soul.
I still don't remember how or when I discovered Julien Baker but I do remember that it was at a time when I needed to. I can't imagine not knowing her music exists......I'm glad it found me.
for me it was the OurVinyl Sessions :)
JeffsMusicalCar are you sure thats not a dude?
rebecarmor GTFO
Audiotree :)
I found her about a year before I found Father John Misty. Two artists who have shaped the way I look at modern music. I remember the first time I heard her was after a breakup where I felt I was completely empty and then I heard "something", and I cried for hours. I couldn't stop crying. It just hit me with everything. It takes someone who puts their soul into it, to do that.
I've really been craving new music with rawness and honesty in the songwriting. I haven't been able to find it lately...until I found Julien's music. This is stunning.
Amanda D try jess williamson
TheMarkmcr Thank you! Listened to a few minutes of a live a session she did, very lovely. Thanks for the recommendation.
Amanda D you're welcome. Gre up on pop music but i can't believe how boring it's been the last 5 years
Amanda D
Try this
Rosalía - Aunque Es De Noche
I've experienced something new this past year... Tears streaming from my eyes while I I'm still doing all the things needing to be done. Cleaning, caring for the animals, driving for work, and so on. It feels awful. I can no longer afford to sit and cry anymore. If I don't stop moving then it will all bury me and all this will have been for not...
I have this thing where I smile every time i see Julien but also feel all the feels when I hear her beautiful songs. All that echos in my head when I listen to this song is the last lines. "I have to believe that it is" Sometimes convincing yourself of something you know isn't true for not your own benefit is all you can manage. I am so excited for this album to come out!
I think self-deception is not beneficial. I think Julien is singing that there may not be evidence in what we see or feel at a particular time but hope is trusting that good will come as promised.
What if hope is a type of deception?
What if the promise is in fact deception? We wouldn't know until it was fulfilled or not. It is in limbo until the outcome. Does that make hope less powerful or promises useless? No. It challenges us to look past out doubts in ourselves, others, God, and the universe and Hope regardless of those aching feelings of uncertainty.
I am challenged to do this everyday when I pray and I lean on my family and friends. I want to break down so often because of the feelings of uncertainty, or certainty that I must be wrong because empirically I have proven it. This is where my faith comes to grip my hope and lift it out of the depths.
I hope you get to read this Julien, this is the first song that touched me, that my feelings of loss for a marriage and the helplessness I could never explain to anyone,. This song describes my abstract feeling of loss. Thank you for being an amazing talent and cultivating your gift. I hope you get to read this and be encouraged that your work is so important.
"Appointments"
I'm staying in tonight
I won't stop you from leaving
I know that I'm not what you wanted
Am I?
Wanted someone who I used to be like
Now you think I'm not trying
Well, don't argue it's not worth the effort to lie
You don't want to bring it up
And I already know how we look
You don't have to remind me so much
How I disappoint you
It's just that I talked to somebody again
That knows how to help me get better
Until then I should just try not to miss anymore
Appointments
I think if I ruin this
That I know I can live with it
Nothing turns out like I pictured it
Maybe the emptiness is just a lesson in canvases
I think if I fail again
That I know you're still listening
Maybe it's all gonna turn out alright
And I know that it's not, but I have to believe that it is
I have to believe that it is
I have to believe that it is
(I have to believe it, I have to believe it)
I have to believe that it is
(Probably not, but I have to believe that it is)
And when I tell you that you that it is
Oh, it's not for my benefit
Maybe it's all gonna turn out alright
Oh, I know that it's not, but I have to believe that it is
Lene Bilagot wow nice job copy+pasting
Lene Bilagot Thanks for posting it here
i love when people post the lyrics.
Thankyouuuu💖
good job
She's so pure
Found this while listening to Manchester Orchestra.
Was in awe from the beginning. Tears throughout the whole song. Thank you!
GOT HERE FROM THE LAST EPISODE OF "THE GOOD DOCTOR" LOVED HER VOICE AND IT IS THE FIRST TIME I HEAR ABOUT JULIEN...NOW I AM MORE CURIOUS ABOUT HER MUSIC AND HER EMOTIONS THRU LYRICS!! BEAUTIFUL SONG......
Ok, boygenius got me interested and I'm kicking myself for not knowing about Julien sooner.
this is the best indie music video I've ever seen.
hey anyone who thinks you are even remotely disappointing is disappointed in themselves. you are radiant in every way and beautiful inside and out and brilliant and you are changing the world kid. good job.
Seeing this on the trending page is making me so happy! An artist like Julien deserves unfathomable recognition! Much love Julien!
Absolutely heartbreaking honey. My beautiful wife died at Christmas. Twenty beautiful years. My second chance at happiness. Her deep interior beauty will sustain me as I suffer. It comes and goes for us all.
Please hang in there young people! Your moments will come. God bless all of those who are suffering.
Ultimate comfort music vid
Tearing up from the song and looking at the comments and realizing that the same thing happened to others. You guys rule.
Addendum:
The ending is very creative. I view the dancers’ brief laying-on of hands and their removal symbolic of the moments of joy we each will experience, and the separation from that joy the periods of darkness we all will feel. Losing my wife is devastating in the extreme and my suffering is excruciating. My life experience though, (in its totality), provides me the wisdom to know that there will be more joyful “laying-on of hands” that life will provide me. There is hope for extended moments of joy for you too. Please believe that.
I'm starting uni tomorrow and I'm proper nervous and emotional. Thank you Julien for sharing your feelings and helping me feel not so alone. I really appreciate it. Bless you.
I don't think I've ever related to a song as much. Jesus.
I wonder if she realizes how much her songwriting has helped others.
The second the song starts, the feelings immediately hit and they hit hard. I can feel the genuine emotions in her singing. There isn't enough of that in music these days. I am so glad I discovered Julien. She is simply amazing.
Julien Baker creates deeply personal music that speaks to me like she's known me my whole life.
This song will literally rip your heart out, repair it, and then put it back in
This still makes me tear up every single time.
When the dancers hugged her at the end, I almost died.
Ugh, I love the moment when she gets up and goes for a drive, trying to leave it all behind at the house - and the moment she gets out, there are all the same feelings, following her out of the car.
I'm so happy this girl got grammy🥰
Woman
to me, the dancers symbolize memories that follow you throughout life that you try to ignore in order to keep sane
Thanks for changing the way I think about music, Julien! Before I discovered your music I was always apologetic and embarrassed that my songs came out sad and unconventionally structured. But after I discovered your music I finally felt okay with what came out when I wrote. I really appreciate that!
That scream at the end of song is so cathartic
Absolutely stunning! Julien floors me every time she releases anything new. This video is kind of how I feel everyday, so it's nice to see it artistically. Thanks for existing and making me feel like someone gets it. God bless.
She's so raw and emotional I love it
I lost track on how many times I hit repeat. ....and it's still not enough!
Anyone else feel something when they pan across the old man sitting on the bench with the blank eyes? (2:45-2:50) This was the hardest hitting part of the video for me.
Been rinsing the repeat button on the Audiotree version of Go Home lately, so happy to come across this too!
Such an emotive voice. GOOSEBUMPS for that ending
i didnt wanna watch the videos of her bc id fall in love even more and here i am lol, IT LASTED JUST 6 MONTHS WITHOUT CHEKCCKING OUR HER VIDEOS OKAY
This is one of the best music videos of the last 5 years.
I was holding back the tears until the end when you let your amazing voice blast. If people weren't sleeping I'd be balling right now, but they are, so little tears with bursts of emotion from being held back it is. ;(
So beautiful and serene! Almost like post-rock, in a way. I feel like her 11/29 show is gonna be nothing short of that :)
Amazing vocals, amazing lyrics, amazing cinematography. An absolute masterpiece of sound and vision.
Julien Baker music in BoJack Horseman will be something else; would leave just about everyone broken and weeping.
Hassan Aftab it was on the show?
What episode?
I don't remember how I found her. But the humble 22 years old Julien Baker made a huge impression on me. This little American woman from Memphis blew me away with her voice and music.
As a Springsteen 'fan' she also is an exeptional songwriter just like Bruce is. She is very open about all her feelings in the songs she writes.
This makes her vulnerable but it looks like she doesn't care. She even talks about her therapy sessions during her concerts. This little diamond really starts to shine when she opens her month and shows all she got.
She dares to show her pain not even in the lyrics she writes but you even can see it in the expression of her face. Julien shows and proofs why I love music so much.
It was heartbreaking at the same time beautiful. 😭🙁
her voice and facial expressions during the last chorus are so heartbreakingly raw
I watched this video 10 times already and I still can't get enough
Oh, the number of times I’ve come back to this video just to have a cleansing cry.
This is amazing. I can't wait to see her show in Boston next month!
I love the song, the passion, the voice and dancing--...may i say --ghosts!? Brilliant.
Remarquable..sa voix,la musique, nous transportes dans un monde que nous rêvons tous...ce genre de chanson qui nous évades dans un monde pleins d'espoir et de joie...cette femme est Remarquable et plein de talent
This is the only artist that could ever bring back emotions that I promised I would never ever think about again. So unique!
Pleasantly reassuring to see that the new album will pick right up where Sprained Ankle left off. If it were possible, I would have worn out my digital copy of Sprained Ankle, I listened to it so much.
"i know that it's not, but i have to believe that it is." ON MY KNEES ROTTING CRYING
Julien's beautiful all over; her words, her voice, and her face all stun me with every song!
This is the most precious human being alive.
LET'S FUCKING CRY YALL THOUGH I KNOW YOU ARE NOT READY YET BUT WHO CARES ITS JULIEN BAKER AFTER ALL
Julien is the feel in person
I don't know Julien as a person, but I Love her as an Artist so much.
This is such a beautiful song, and I love the video. I really think Julien's going to hit it big with this new album.
Depression is not sexy or a marketable quality like breasts and buttocks. She's got a more wider reach now maybe and found her audience, which is a lot of sad people actually :(:
She just got nominated for a bunch of Grammy’s…you called it…
it seems to me that this video is about the beauty and grace (dancers) that we see in the world all the time, but is hard to feel or react to in most situations. even when we do feel it, in places where we feel most comfortable (bed) or where the beauty is most encompassing (beach or some other natural wonder), its touch is fleeting. but the fact that it is present and tangible at all provides enough of a reason to keep moving.
regardless of meaning thank you julien for continuing to share your vision with us :)
I was trying to figure out what the dancers symbolized! But yeah, by how you described it, it all made sense by the end of the video.
She had tweeted something about side eyeing her demons in the store/restaurant. I can see that in the idea where she tries to move away from them, and they follow her wherever she goes unable to rest in peace.
Interesting. I wonder why she would portray her demons as dancers?
This is a pure guess, but it could be the deceptiveness of demons. They are enticing. They are beautiful, and consistent.
Honestly just speaking from experience... I feel like this is real life most of the time. Me, I’m just sort of there, but everyone else with reasonably stable mental health is moving with grace and energy I can’t really figure out. They move in to help when they feel they can, and when they fail it’s off to the next project, and I’m back to my lonesome again. There’s a perverse joy in realizing you haven’t done anything for a month except what little is needed to keep alive, but that also tends to push people away who have that grace and energy, because why would they want to be held down by my dead weight?
I absolutely love her..... like her lyrics speak to my soul.
Is anyone else getting an under water effect on the video or is that my tears
She's so amazingly good at capturing and expressing her emotions through her music. It's so genuine. And a big reminder of the essence of music in general.
Holy...
Absolutely stunning.
She is so talented as a singer and songwriter. She is also beautiful to look at, and watch her belt out those lyrics.
I’m in love with her face, her tattoos, the way she carries herself as a whole
really? just why?
This song... It's so "nail on the head" it's ridiculous.
I love this more than anything
what's up with autumn 2017 and all the amazing new music releases? thank you, talented musicians! You are saving my life with every one of these
[Verse 1]
I'm staying in tonight
I won't stop you from leaving
I know that I'm not what you wanted
Am I?
Wanted someone who I used to be like
Now you think I'm not trying
I don't argue, it's not worth the effort to lie
You don't want to bring it up
And I already know how it looks
You don't have to remind me so much
How I disappoint you
Suggest that I talk to somebody again
That knows how to help me get better
And 'til then I should just try not to miss any more
Appointments
[Verse 2]
I think if I ruin this
That I know I can live with it
Nothing turns out like I pictured it
Maybe the emptiness is just a lesson in canvases
I think if I fail again
That I know you're still listening
Maybe it's all gonna turn out all right
And I know that it's not, but I have to believe that it is
[Bridge]
I have to believe that it is
I have to believe that it is
(I have to believe it, I have to believe it)
I have to believe that it is
(Probably not, but I have to believe that it is)
[Chorus]
And when I tell you that it is
Oh, it's not for my benefit
Maybe it's all gonna turn out all right
Oh, I know that it's not, but I have to believe that it is
Anirudh thnkgod u did it
I'm dealing with derealization and I'm struggling pretty bad. This song is everything right now. THANK YOU.
“Maybe it’s all gonna turn out alright and I know that it’s not but I have to believe that it is.”
I empathize with Ms Baker. I hate it when I'm going about my business and being followed by a group of interpretative dancers. Happens more often than you would think.
Empathize
Dude, absolutely.
@@Collective239 Thank you!
I felt time stop for a moment and brought me back to my youth while listening to this song.
always amazed by your talent and your way to bring emotions to the surface.
The voice of a broken angel fallen from a torn cloud. Just wonderful.
Julien is so precious.
Julien Baker has been the most unique find of my short 27 years of life. She is just amazing all around.
Riley Lawson happy now?
I'm not crying, YOU'RE crying!
Graham Kristensen I'm not crying!..... I'm ugly crying!
She's such an incredibly talented artist... Every song from Julien is so beautiful!
She was in my recommendations and i was like why mot and i think im in love