Trump Denies Climate Science In Fire-Scarred California, Echoing His Downplaying Of The Coronavir…

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  • Опубликовано: 26 сен 2024
  • Stephen Colbert addresses the issue on everyone's mind (that photo of Chris Evans' penis) before turning to the day's other pressing stories including the California wildfires and new revelations from Bob Woodward about President Trump's handling of the pandemic. #Colbert #Election2020 #Monologue
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Комментарии • 5 тыс.

  • @NorthMountainFairy
    @NorthMountainFairy 4 года назад +109

    I’ve been hiking the woods for years and exploding trees have always been a bigger threat than bear encounters. That’s why I tell everyone anytime they brave the woods for a hike or for a little camping, you MUST always wear a head to toe flameproof suit the entire time you’re in the ancient explosive landscape of the forest.
    The more you know 🌈⭐️

    • @telectronix1368
      @telectronix1368 4 года назад +15

      You mean you didn't learn the forest lore that to get away from a bear you just run uphill, kicking a dry tree downwards behind you?
      How do folk survive today without knowing basics of exploding tree usage?

    • @ixchelssong
      @ixchelssong 4 года назад +5

      I used to work for the Forest Service. And now I know we have to expand the definition of "widow maker."

    • @VP_A-Team
      @VP_A-Team 4 года назад +4

      @@ixchelssong I used to work for he forest service as well. We learned early that you don't always look up for widow makers. The ones on the ground are the sneaky ones. That's why I always wore the full bomb disposal gear in the bush. It made work a lot harder and slower (and it was f$%^& hot!!!) but better safe than sorry.
      I lost two of my technicians once when they thought I was joking and they left their gear in the truck. It was a difficult day explaining their deaths to their families...

    • @yoyobrando9243
      @yoyobrando9243 4 года назад +5

      I also have been hiking the woods for years, and I agree with your assessment. But I would also add a bit of knowledge that a ranger taught me. Contrary to popular practice you should always keep your food in your tent. That way when a tree explodes in the night you can smear the inside tent fabric with mayonnaise, or some other non-combustable food stuff to keep yourself safe from burning up. Like you said, the more you know.

    • @terryfuldsgaming7995
      @terryfuldsgaming7995 4 года назад +3

      I bet you didnt know that bear mace is actually just a small fire extinguisher for exploding trees. they just dont tell you that because they want to downplay the danger. Dont want to start a panic you know?

  • @justinlibby-perry1601
    @justinlibby-perry1601 4 года назад +148

    "We now know the president lied..."
    Shut. The. Front. Door. 😱

  • @maximilianb7722
    @maximilianb7722 4 года назад +322

    "I don't think science knows"
    Honestly I'm just at a loss of words at this point.

    • @telectronix1368
      @telectronix1368 4 года назад +19

      I mean he probably doesn't think this.
      Because he doesn't understand what science is.

    • @CloudsGirl7
      @CloudsGirl7 4 года назад +19

      The buffoon doesn't understand the difference between seasons and climate, just like how he doesn't understand the difference between science and religion.
      I mean, he could have stopped at "think", and for once he would have told the truth.

    • @PeopleHealthTru
      @PeopleHealthTru 4 года назад +1

      @@telectronix1368 The only way to stop the forest and building fires is to send all Demonrats antifa and lawyers to the FEMA concentration camps until the arsons stop occurring.

    • @telectronix1368
      @telectronix1368 4 года назад +12

      @@PeopleHealthTru Proving that the 'magafan' stereotype is indeed based in truth.
      Good job! 👍🏼

    • @lisajenkins4416
      @lisajenkins4416 4 года назад +10

      I don't think, science knows

  • @superfuzz81
    @superfuzz81 4 года назад +6

    I moved from Germany to the USA as a young adult in 2004 and I still remember the first two culture shocks I experienced. First one was when a store clerk at the local shopping mall greeted me with "How are you doing?". The second one was when I learned that in the USA the existence of climate change was the subject of political debate.

  • @tfox285
    @tfox285 4 года назад +192

    I can’t wait until you interview Chris Evans next.

  • @rrrjjj5572
    @rrrjjj5572 4 года назад +170

    I live in the forest in Washington. Trees, after 18 months are not "dry as matchsticks." And they do not explode. Ever. What a nutjob.

    • @lilaclizard4504
      @lilaclizard4504 4 года назад +12

      You're lucky! Try living in Australia where they literally do! Eucalyptus oil vapour is highly flamable & the trees like fires & so deliberately try to create & intensify them by waiting until the weather reaches peak dryness, then dropping literally half their leaves & large numbers of branches over a period of just 1-2 weeks, leaving the ground 2 foot deep in fresh leaf litter, even if it was completely clear before, all in an attempt to give the fire more fuel. They also half shed their bark & leave it hanging off the trunk so as to act like tinder & grab any ground fire & raise it into those flamable leaves & then the bark flies off & starts dozens of new fires 20kms away & repeats & once the fire is going, then trees literally explode/shatter & send burning wood in all directions as the fire approaches

    • @zacklance7798
      @zacklance7798 4 года назад +5

      Some kinds of aspens found across the US can do the same thing and reignite behind fire lines trapping crews and equipment

    • @ecchidragon8038
      @ecchidragon8038 4 года назад +16

      @@lilaclizard4504 So even your _trees_ try to kill you?
      It's official - Australia is a Death World.

    • @lilaclizard4504
      @lilaclizard4504 4 года назад +7

      @@zacklance7798 Yup. Pine trees too. Imported Eucalyptus trees in Cali in addition to that too.
      Any trees with volatile oils in their leaves/needles are a problem

    • @lilaclizard4504
      @lilaclizard4504 4 года назад +5

      ​@@ecchidragon8038 lol :) Well they're not really trying to kill us though, it's just their way of making babies :) They send out billions of seeds on the wind, in protected coatings that only break with temperatures over about 1000 degrees, so then they need to get the fire that hot, & then to their babies to help them germinate :)
      Those super hot fires also clear out everything else, so that their babies get full sunlight & no competition (except that lots of species do the same thing lol, a few months after fires here the bush is teaming with life!)

  • @spacemanspiff2137
    @spacemanspiff2137 4 года назад +377

    This next hurricane season is just a result of ocean mismanagement

    • @lilsammich8252
      @lilsammich8252 4 года назад +34

      If we just vacuumed the ocean we wouldnt even have hurricanes.

    • @annamara5252
      @annamara5252 4 года назад +5

      @@lilsammich8252vacuum the sand you say? man I just can't anymore 😪 😕 😩,

    • @aeolussvichi7680
      @aeolussvichi7680 4 года назад +11

      Yea, Poseidon is really slacking on his duties.
      But trump better be careful, next time he goes on his yacht Poseidon might send him his very own little Odyssey like he did back in the day with the last guy who disrespected him lol.

    • @marcorubio4628
      @marcorubio4628 4 года назад +5

      Why can’t I decipher funny and serious dogma anymore no 🧢

    • @joeowle9494
      @joeowle9494 4 года назад +5

      Spaceman Spiff It’s Obama‘s fault.

  • @jacquelinefaye9669
    @jacquelinefaye9669 4 года назад +87

    My beautiful Husband died in May. This is the first time I’ve belly laughed since then. Thank you, Steven. ❤️

  • @alainarchambault2331
    @alainarchambault2331 4 года назад +54

    50% of forest land is federal. Perhaps he should take his own advice and help out.

    • @Petalumination
      @Petalumination 4 года назад +2

      Don’t go muddying the water with facts. Trump will call you boring and rapidly fading.

  • @lorenrenee1
    @lorenrenee1 4 года назад +150

    Oh and Trump cut the forestry service funding when he first took control.

    • @JamesUmbrello
      @JamesUmbrello 4 года назад +1

      That’s not good but t he y were not using the money properly so it’s not a big loss.

    • @mori1bund
      @mori1bund 4 года назад +11

      @@JamesUmbrello that's a lie and you know that, troll!

    • @Shin_Lona
      @Shin_Lona 4 года назад +1

      @@mori1bund What about the state budgets? They are the ones making cuts.

    • @mori1bund
      @mori1bund 4 года назад +6

      @@Shin_Lona 1.) "what about..." -> yeah, that's why this kind of deflection is called a "Whataboutism" 🙄🙄😏
      2.) Have you even watched the clip? Obviously not! 😏😏🙄

    • @DaveCM
      @DaveCM 4 года назад +7

      @@Shin_Lona The state doesn't maintain and regulate federal forests which have been the majority of what is burning.

  • @marthabixler1606
    @marthabixler1606 4 года назад +99

    Trumps knowledge of absolutely anything wouldn't even fill a thimble.

    • @megabyte01
      @megabyte01 4 года назад +2

      No, I suspect the problem is worse than arrogance.
      I know people like Trump. When you get into a conversation like that with them, they are playing word games with you. When Trump says it's going to get colder, he means that it's going to be winter soon.
      Yes, I agree that it's the opposite of cleverness to be deliberately vague and then insult when you're misunderstood

    • @AverageEldritchEntity
      @AverageEldritchEntity 4 года назад +3

      You could fit his capacity for empathy into a matchbox without removing the matches.

    • @trnharris
      @trnharris 4 года назад +1

      It wouldn't fill the tip of a match.

    • @trnharris
      @trnharris 4 года назад +1

      @@megabyte01 I'm really glad I don't personally know people like Trump. It's enough having to deal with just the likes of him.

    • @davidmayo3185
      @davidmayo3185 4 года назад

      he is smarter than you , he is president!

  • @alexv3357
    @alexv3357 4 года назад +194

    Stephen's wife laughing in the background of the show is one of the best parts of the COVID era

    • @bicanoo_magic3452
      @bicanoo_magic3452 4 года назад +2

      The southern hemisphere has just hit spring. COVID was already dead during winter. We are almost totally opened up and you won't find a mask that much anymore. Sweden didn't even do a lock down and they have exactly the same stats per head of population as the rest of the world. Yet their economy hasn't suffered one iota. Explain that away with your paranoia. And before you start quoting stupid places like the CDC and the WHO. CDC is owned by Gates and Fauci. WHO is owned by the CCP.

    • @alexv3357
      @alexv3357 4 года назад +5

      @@bicanoo_magic3452 Please take your bullshit propaganda elsewhere. Europe and the southern hemisphere are doing well because they had effective nation-wide outbreak responses, whereas the US's plan to combat COVID is still "let the states deal with it." Trump and his cronies have been preventing the CDC's professionals from actually tackling the problem, thus making the pandemic worse than it should have been for everyone. Hell even _China_ managed this disease better than we have, and they managed it abysmally, especially early on, and it is entirely Trump's fault that over 200,000 people have died as a result. The CDC in the span of one disaster has gone from the world's most respected medical institution to a muzzled irrelevancy for no good reason. Trump has squandered all of its 74 years of good work for nothing.

    • @annwilliams6438
      @annwilliams6438 4 года назад +2

      bicanoo_magic Yup, because your country just didn’t give your pensioners CoVid treatment, just let them die and then didn’t report them as CoVid statistics!

    • @bicanoo_magic3452
      @bicanoo_magic3452 4 года назад

      @@annwilliams6438 Our country was JUST as guilty as the rest.The CDC revised their figures downwards again today. Lieing sneaky bastards. No media announcement or apology, just a quite post on Fauci and Bill's website. These people should be hung for crimes against humanity.Bill will for sure. Fauci patented COVID-19 before the outbreak. How can you patent something that is apparently naturally occurring? You can't patent nature. You can ONLY patent man made 'inventions".

    • @abrianaholliday5042
      @abrianaholliday5042 4 года назад +2

      yes omg it really brings me joy. and Stephen seems like such an amazing and heartwarming presence in her life. i love that he makes her laugh

  • @Squishylemoncat
    @Squishylemoncat 4 года назад +73

    I can't tell you how many times an exploding tree has really messed up my day.

  • @bosvigos9165
    @bosvigos9165 4 года назад +41

    So happy you are back! Oh, I have missed you. Your glorious sense humour in such dreadful times is much appreciated. 💚 from Ireland 🍀☔️🥃

  • @nyamaruruduke4752
    @nyamaruruduke4752 4 года назад +383

    I don't think science knows actually.....
    Ladies and gentlemen. The president of the United States of America

    • @emerje0
      @emerje0 4 года назад +27

      Trump thinks "science" is people in lab coats thinking hard about stuff and nobody thinks harder than he does. Science also doesn't know about exploding trees and that COVID-19 will just go away.

    • @NeoMorphUK
      @NeoMorphUK 4 года назад +16

      This from the President of “Lets get people to sweep up the leaves” and “It’ll get cooler” like “one day it will just go away” in reference to the Coronavirus.
      President Dumber Trump.

    • @aweescotsdog8358
      @aweescotsdog8358 4 года назад +11

      Good point. Reminds me of the time when Sarah Huckabee Sander’s claimed that a climate change report by multiple government agencies was “not based on facts or data”.
      A Climate of Denial (aka Donald Trump's Gas Tricks)
      Don Trump trusts his gut more than his brain
      For it covers, by far, more terrain
      With a massive expanse
      Even bigger than France
      It requires gastric bands to restrain
      And though his choice might seem quite quaint
      His gut is one thing his brain ain't
      It is always quite full
      As a general rule
      Though what's in it is not for the faint
      The inner workings of Donald Trump
      His intestinal greenhouse gas pump
      That in just a short while
      Can produce quite a pile
      Sarah Huckabee's huge data dump!
      And now that she has what she needs
      To fertilise all of her seeds
      Of doubt that she sows
      The debt that she owes
      Is to Trump for his excessive greed
      Yet if only they thought with their heads
      Things might be a bit better it's said
      But that might not be true
      There is shlt in there too
      All over, and it's evenly spread

    • @nyamaruruduke4752
      @nyamaruruduke4752 4 года назад +12

      @Kent Horvath this is an irresponsible comment.

    • @nyamaruruduke4752
      @nyamaruruduke4752 4 года назад +16

      @Kent Horvath That's why people do research. To find solutions to all these problems. In terms of forest fires. We do actually know what causes them and how they can be prevented. It's just that this administration is too dumb to act on it. They'd rather stick their heads in the sand and ignore scientific advice. And before you say that its the work of the states. Be reminded that majority of forest land is owned by the federal government

  • @illseed7
    @illseed7 4 года назад +29

    I swear Stephen’s sense of humor warms my heart and brightens my day.

  • @Akathuty
    @Akathuty 4 года назад +68

    😂 Tree explode! Then why spend so much on military budgets, just spend money on wood cutters and salvage the trees and throw it on the enemy.

    • @emerje0
      @emerje0 4 года назад +4

      He probably thinks that's what IEDs are. "They bury logs under the road and wait for them to explode when American trucks drive over them."

    • @kravlonarussia990
      @kravlonarussia990 4 года назад

      🤣🤣🤣🤣😋🤣🤣🤣

    • @Peter-dy3tf
      @Peter-dy3tf 4 года назад +2

      Bark go boom boom!

    • @Larka661
      @Larka661 4 года назад +1

      True, if trees explode why cant we just use Trees as bombs?🤣

    • @DJ118USMC
      @DJ118USMC 4 года назад +2

      Cause we obviously can not contain the inevitable flames all those "Exploding trees" will create. :P

  • @223Drone
    @223Drone 4 года назад +100

    You can't be taken out of context when you're openly denying science.

    • @blue-pb7mn
      @blue-pb7mn 4 года назад +8

      His base; HE DIDN'T SAY THAT!!! HE MEANT......!!! 😭😵😖😠😡

    • @fredrick443
      @fredrick443 4 года назад

      Read a lot of climate science research papers, have you?

    • @223Drone
      @223Drone 4 года назад

      @@fredrick443 I'm pretty sure you haven't.

    • @fredrick443
      @fredrick443 4 года назад

      @@223Drone Haha. So, no then.

    • @223Drone
      @223Drone 4 года назад

      @@fredrick443 I'm not the one who refuses to listen to scientific sources.

  • @zesty9815
    @zesty9815 4 года назад +532

    Coronavirus? ♦ “It'll get warmer”
    Forest fires? ♦ “It'll get cooler”

    • @ampleoloruntogbe1434
      @ampleoloruntogbe1434 4 года назад +37

      Shhh! Trump is allergic to logic and common sense

    • @henrytai6227
      @henrytai6227 4 года назад +9

      Yeah, like make up your mind, man🤷‍♂️

    • @Arltratlo
      @Arltratlo 4 года назад +11

      @@ampleoloruntogbe1434 you mean his voters...!

    • @gggnumber1
      @gggnumber1 4 года назад +6

      Zesty- No problem. It'll do both at the same time.

    • @lorilazise1521
      @lorilazise1521 4 года назад +3

      Zesty lol

  • @charlesroberts3650
    @charlesroberts3650 4 года назад +34

    That's it, I loathe trump 110%- he MISPRONOUNCED Oregon, (Oregan) he's OVER THE TOP.

    • @i2pjd6hRw5P
      @i2pjd6hRw5P 4 года назад +11

      @Erik R nah, we don't like Biden either. We just realize that he's far better than drumpf

    • @empressvintage7760
      @empressvintage7760 4 года назад +8

      Of course he did. Thighland and Yo-semite were just the tip of the iceberg.

    • @ellinmara5997
      @ellinmara5997 4 года назад +1

      @Erik R because disliking one person automatically makes you like the other one? If that were true, Hillary would be president now...

    • @cyny6305
      @cyny6305 4 года назад

      @@empressvintage7760 I had not heard the "Thighland" one. Just watched it on youtube. Trump is an absolute Bewb. If I ever travel I will say I'm Canadian.

  • @jdax21
    @jdax21 4 года назад +39

    In all seriousness: Chris Evans, we love you. Nothing has changed. You're amazing, we respect you and you will always be our hero.

  • @Dean0017
    @Dean0017 4 года назад +233

    Bill Murray quote. "It’s hard to win an argument with a smart person, but it’s damn near impossible to win an argument with a stupid person."

    • @parsnipmcgee329
      @parsnipmcgee329 4 года назад +4

      I just googled that quote because I'd have bet my shoes that it was from Mark Twain. Bill Murray.

    • @calpurniabruchi5742
      @calpurniabruchi5742 4 года назад +1

      @@parsnipmcgee329 no Mark Twain did NOT say this, do some more googling.

    • @parsnipmcgee329
      @parsnipmcgee329 4 года назад +4

      @@calpurniabruchi5742 Uncle! I googled and learned. Yeesh. Give a girl a break.

    • @NBGTFO
      @NBGTFO 4 года назад

      And the idiots like to get their news from stupid, washed-up, lying comedians rather than actual news sources... although most of those aren't much better.

    • @Dean0017
      @Dean0017 4 года назад +15

      @@NBGTFO News? No man... I'm just another Canadian that likes to laugh at the Trumptards of America... Why are you watching this video?

  • @dvvinever
    @dvvinever 4 года назад +80

    "You know in April when the weather gets warmer it'll just go away"
    "You know in December when the weather gets cooler it'll just go away"
    You know in November when the people wise up you will just be going away.

    • @batintheattic7293
      @batintheattic7293 4 года назад +2

      Tee hee!
      But, seriously, what Trump is talking about there is a perpetual cycle of fire and virus and he has pictured himself idiotically skipping along in front of it. Perhaps he's merrily calling out stock market tips to his cronies. "Buy Hydroxy now!" ... "Buy fireproofing now!" I want him to fumble a skip and for it to catch up with him. All four seasons, burning while drowning in sputum. I'd like to see that.

    • @hummelchen6773
      @hummelchen6773 4 года назад +1

      You know on November 3rd whether it's warmer or cooler the Orange Being will just go away.

    • @19lhernandez
      @19lhernandez 4 года назад +1

      D WINEVER I am praying for that Everyday!!!

  • @lisafuller624
    @lisafuller624 4 года назад +8

    Okay, so the whole Chris Evans set made me giggle more than I have in a LONG time. Thank you!!

  • @cloud__99
    @cloud__99 4 года назад +128

    Stephen is getting SO good at these no audience shows

  • @MsAuntie-Hero
    @MsAuntie-Hero 4 года назад +62

    As a Latino in Nevada I can honestly say: trump 2020 for prison!

    • @rudyjimenez1689
      @rudyjimenez1689 4 года назад

      As another Nevaden Latino you are full of CaCa.

    • @misskitty6586
      @misskitty6586 4 года назад +6

      Trump doesn't care about you. You'll realize that eventually.

    • @groot-yq7yq
      @groot-yq7yq 4 года назад

      Just because you've been in prison, doesn't mean anything

    • @19lhernandez
      @19lhernandez 4 года назад +3

      M A As a Latina from Texas, I say the same thing!!! Can’t wait to see them dragging that orange buffoon trump from the White House!!

  • @BrianHolmes
    @BrianHolmes 4 года назад +111

    Stephen, I hope to see you retire Trump's voice from your catalog this year, would like to never hear his voice again. Glad to see you back.

    • @everwhat013
      @everwhat013 4 года назад +3

      same. sometimes lately, i don't even watch because i know it's trump jokes and i just don't find him [trump] funny anymore.

    • @BubblewrapHighway
      @BubblewrapHighway 4 года назад +2

      @@everwhat013 I find trump offensive to my intelligence.

    • @mainheim2061
      @mainheim2061 4 года назад

      When most of the media only roasts trump it shows they have a bias and an agenda so why should I trust anything they say, the news should be neutral and just present information and let you decide what to believe. when they spin everything, bring experts that bash trump and show clips out of context to make him look bad. When I research many of the things that they say he said they are out of context or he didn't even say them at all so I can't trust the msm wben they lie as they have an obvious political agenda

    • @michellefu4002
      @michellefu4002 4 года назад

      And after two weeks off, Stephen's T-dump voice is a little rusty.

    • @WakeUpAmerican000s
      @WakeUpAmerican000s 4 года назад +1

      @@mainheim2061 - the media (except the alt-right propaganda networks) mostly just play clips of the impeached president saying something incredibly stupid, or lying about something, or calling somebody names. Colbert does the satire, along with other late night hosts. We have a turd in the White House punch bowl who has committed treason, has been stealing from taxpayers to line his own pockets, has abdicated his oath of office, and is only skilled at running organizations into bankruptcy. He is propped up by the right-wing-nuts because he still has one remaining asset: he's easily manipulated by more powerful men who make up the donor class that funds the corrupt republican party.

  • @FairuzaMNasir
    @FairuzaMNasir 4 года назад +8

    20 years ago, I was hopeful of what Internet could bring to the general public. Finally everybody can get access to variety of encyclopedias and we can all be smarter and more knowledgeable together... I was a fool. I was a daym fool. How did we become more dumb? 🤦‍♂️

  • @enricoferri4916
    @enricoferri4916 4 года назад +80

    I hope we never have any of those exploding logs here in Australia.

    • @spencerphilippinedream3706
      @spencerphilippinedream3706 4 года назад +4

      he said exploding tree. an exploding log is WAY different.

    • @vadimuzdensky2384
      @vadimuzdensky2384 4 года назад +3

      I believe you had exploding bushes, if I remember correctly.

    • @spencerphilippinedream3706
      @spencerphilippinedream3706 4 года назад +3

      @@vadimuzdensky2384 again, totally different. actually, that one will leave you burnin for a while.

    • @TheJeweledBird
      @TheJeweledBird 4 года назад

      Australia has those pesky drop bears though.

    • @enricoferri4916
      @enricoferri4916 4 года назад +2

      @@spencerphilippinedream3706 Ah, that makes sense then!!

  • @devy1534
    @devy1534 4 года назад +377

    And calling the pandemic a democrat hoax was to avoid a panic of course.

    • @BigMikeMcBastard
      @BigMikeMcBastard 4 года назад +26

      Also the non-stop fearmongering about immigrants and leftists/anti-fascists, "rigged elections" you need to commit a felony by voting twice to counteract, centrist milquetoast loser Biden wanting to "destroy the suburbs", the infamous "caravan" poised to invade America that magically stopped existing after the midterms, etc etc etc.. Whoops, I guess what Trump meant to say was that he only wants to incite panic in ways that push his agenda.

    • @ampleoloruntogbe1434
      @ampleoloruntogbe1434 4 года назад +14

      Just like the imaginary caravans that never made it

    • @nora22000
      @nora22000 4 года назад +9

      Yves Delage He was preventing Wall Street panic, more fraud and corruption.

    • @johnlennon1970
      @johnlennon1970 4 года назад

      Why are Democrat cities all ON FIRE?
      JUST SAYING!

    • @lilylily9012
      @lilylily9012 4 года назад +5

      Yet there are people who accept his "didn't want to cause panic"

  • @Seantendo
    @Seantendo 4 года назад +100

    Stephen missed an obvious Smash Mouth reference:
    "My world's on fire, how 'bout yours?"

    • @nurlindafsihotang49
      @nurlindafsihotang49 4 года назад

      Ah! I tought i was the only one!😂😂

    • @sapphireriddles6692
      @sapphireriddles6692 4 года назад

      That's cause the next line is "that's the way i like it"

    • @nnooooooooooooo
      @nnooooooooooooo 3 года назад

      @@sapphireriddles6692 Can't really say we're getting bored, though.

  • @rayceeya8659
    @rayceeya8659 4 года назад +20

    Twenty years ago I was working in the wine industry in California. You know who has zero doubts about climate change, wine makers. The last two decades the wine harvest has been raisins. It's getting harder and harder to make good wine in California because of climate change. Only a fool would doubt those facts.

    • @tails0420ify
      @tails0420ify 4 года назад

      Isn't Devin Nunez a winemaker or is whinemaker?

    • @LePedant
      @LePedant 4 года назад

      Anecdotal evidence are not facts. There are plenty of actual science backing up climate change. It would be better to use the science when trying to convince people of climate change, because they can easily give you their own anecdote to counter yours.

    • @rayceeya8659
      @rayceeya8659 4 года назад

      @@LePedant It's not anecdotal. It was all over the trade magazines back then and still is. When you work in an industry like that you all learn to speak the same language and the word two decades ago was "What the hell are we going to do?" I saw the projections and the predictions from climatologists and there is plenty of hard evidence out there.

    • @LePedant
      @LePedant 4 года назад

      @Kent Horvath WTF you talking about? Climate change's solution? It's a scientific theory not a person.
      Also, adding more money to the Forest Management to help combat climate change would be a greart start.

    • @rayceeya8659
      @rayceeya8659 4 года назад

      @Kent Horvath There are no short term solutions. It took over a century for things to get this bad and it's going to take even longer to fix things. However, if we don't make the effort, then we are dooming ourselves to extinction.
      As George Carlin said, "The planet is fine, we're fucked."

  • @icetrae8417
    @icetrae8417 4 года назад +190

    I love the person in the background trying to supress their laughter. And you could see Colbert trying too. It's the funniest thing and we need funny right now.

  • @jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj178
    @jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj178 4 года назад +568

    "I don't think science knows, actually.."
    -The president of the United States

    • @bumgarner4987
      @bumgarner4987 4 года назад +39

      AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
      Why is our leader so dumb ?!!! Ugh 🤦🏼‍♀️

    • @PeopleHealthTru
      @PeopleHealthTru 4 года назад +2

      @Andrew Taylor Truth is that CO2 is the lowest in thousands of years of history, the earth is greening more than drying, and the sun affects climate a thousand times more than humans.

    • @PeopleHealthTru
      @PeopleHealthTru 4 года назад +1

      @Andrew Taylor History guarantees that a cooling age will follow a warming age, until God burns up the Demonrats and the earth.

    • @Silvervein55
      @Silvervein55 4 года назад +32

      @@PeopleHealthTru Truth is, you are a troll. Science knows, friend.

    • @LDiamondz
      @LDiamondz 4 года назад +21

      @@PeopleHealthTru you are an idiot, we all know, friend.

  • @kevingconroy1443
    @kevingconroy1443 4 года назад +73

    Science doesn’t know oh ffs someone shut him up.

    • @JellyFinch
      @JellyFinch 4 года назад +7

      Science certainly knew enough to give him that microphone, his cars' GPS nav, his plane, his food, his shitty tan, and that pocket sized super computer he word-vomits from 24/7, but hey, I'm sure a reality TV star can take the scientific community to school on climate.

    • @ellynmacgregor8210
      @ellynmacgregor8210 4 года назад +1

      @An Deo "Fix Mother Nature is easy"? Then you agree with tRump, for example, that the best way to "fix" a hurricane is to hit it with a nuclear device?

    • @aponiaa
      @aponiaa 3 года назад

      a Trump supporter: tHaT's NoT wHaT hE sAiD

  • @KesselRunner606
    @KesselRunner606 4 года назад +130

    "I don't think the science knows, actually."
    Let me guess. You know more about the climate than anyone.

    • @travissiegwart8276
      @travissiegwart8276 4 года назад +18

      More than anyone, believe me. I have, the doctors say that I have a great brain. A beautiful brain. They look at the pictures of my brain and say "isn't that something, this is a perfect beautiful brain". Do you believe that? I get told all the time. I was talking to this big strong man. Big tough guy. He said "you are so smart, truly the smartest" and he was said it too. Tough guy, crying and saying "I don't even understand how you can be this smart" and he didn't even cry when he was a baby. Believe me. He told me. Anyways, many people are saying I'm the smartest person to ever live. I don't know about that but they are saying it. Just listen.

    • @parslowpongbert1566
      @parslowpongbert1566 4 года назад +3

      He does because scientists only go by evidence and reality whereas trump goes by what Putin and McConnell tell him will best destroy America.

    • @zesty9815
      @zesty9815 4 года назад +3

      But of course! His uncle was a professor at MIT, you see. So he has a "natural ability".

    • @CloudsGirl7
      @CloudsGirl7 4 года назад +1

      Spoiler: He doesn't.
      ...Guess it's not a spoiler, though, if it's common knowledge, huh?

  • @leannhocuspocus4810
    @leannhocuspocus4810 4 года назад +67

    Stephen Colbert please, please do a section called, "Meanwhile in other countries" so we can see what is going on in other countries while we are dealing with the pandemic here...

    • @batintheattic7293
      @batintheattic7293 4 года назад +5

      We're not good in the UK. Schools have gone back, after the summer holidays, and now our Covid cases are rising dramatically. Some towns are going into strict lockdown, again.

    • @Textile_Courtesan
      @Textile_Courtesan 4 года назад +2

      @@batintheattic7293 I'm so sorry to hear that. I wish we had your numbers here, it's been rough because I know people who won't wear masks and buy into the idea it's a hoax.

    • @JMBBrasil
      @JMBBrasil 4 года назад +6

      That’s the best idea!! I wish you all knew about what’s been going on in Brasil for example. We are the at the verge of dictatorship...another one. Probably financed by the USA, again.

    • @deetw6470
      @deetw6470 4 года назад +8

      Meanwhile in New Zealand the closest thing to Trump is a thing called Brian Tamaki.....self proclaimed "bishop" & cult leader of Destiny's Church, he's also a staunch believer in the idea that the gays cause earthquakes 🤦‍♀️. This year his wife is trying her hand at politics, but with Aunty Jacinda & Crusher Collins leading the 2 major parties here she doesn't stand a chance thank goodness

    • @Fritzolennon
      @Fritzolennon 4 года назад

      @@deetw6470 Wow. Sorry for your loss

  • @laurenhague4439
    @laurenhague4439 4 года назад +93

    Bless California’s secretary of natural resource’s heart, he thought being rational with tr*mp would get him somewhere. Also, I really think we need to start being more specific than just saying “it’s science.” It can be dismissed too easily, just like we saw tr*mp do right there. Explain how climate change contributes to these fires in detail and tr*mp and republicans will have a harder time discrediting it. They’ll still try but it’ll be a lot harder to dispute it.

    • @pakpala1
      @pakpala1 4 года назад +11

      Rational arguments don't work when talking to irrational greedy humans...

    • @douglaslowe5
      @douglaslowe5 4 года назад +8

      Trying to reason with someone like Dolt 45 is impossible. Akin to playing chess with a Rabid opossum.

    • @sunnypuri4933
      @sunnypuri4933 4 года назад +7

      Or we can vote this jacka$$ out and blacklist his bootlickers.

    • @CB-zt6qs
      @CB-zt6qs 4 года назад +12

      How to be more specific? The entire west coast is burning and the ashes are landing in Canada. If you want a sample of the ash, I'll go wipe some off a car and send it to you. You folks down there need to vote this guy out. Listen to him chuckle when someone says "... worst record in history..." he actually looks away like it's a proud moment. Completely F'd.

    • @OziJo1
      @OziJo1 4 года назад +7

      Sadly, many people tune out after a couple of sentences on the same topic. That’s why Trump is so effective. His language is simplistic and he moves from one rambling idea to another. There’s method in his madness...

  • @miskatonicalumni5612
    @miskatonicalumni5612 4 года назад +54

    First they came for the Immigrants- I did not speak out because I was not a Immigrant.
    Then they came for the BLM- I did not speak out because I was not a BLM.
    Then they came for the Democrats- and I did not speak out because I was not a Democrat.
    Then they came for me- and there was no one left to speak for me.... VOTE! Because your life may depend on it.

    • @elttygomez3980
      @elttygomez3980 4 года назад +3

      Oh I will vote this time around -Biden/ Harris-

    • @thorman1742
      @thorman1742 4 года назад

      The democrats told me about "light at the end of the tunnel" all my life. You will never reach the light and always stay in the tunnel with them. Glad I left them. They chased me away with their unfounded anti-hydroxychloroquine hysteria, after trump mentioned it. He gives helpful information, and they don't even want to listen...

    • @Herschel1738
      @Herschel1738 4 года назад +2

      @@thorman1742 So, have you taken his helpful advice to drink bleach , yet?
      In actual tests on real patients, hydroxychloroquine not only DIDN'T work, it had serious side effects.
      But, hey, if you like Trump shining a flashlight in your face and telling you that your are at the end of the tunnel, delude yourself. It's literally your funeral.

    • @thorman1742
      @thorman1742 4 года назад

      @@Herschel1738 You only need 3 or so pills to get better, one each day, ask your doctor. At those "actual tests" they apparently gave them 10 pills first day, then 4 pills each day after. In excess of guidelines, max. 2/day. They stopped after excess death occurred - so, rather a simple matter of overdose. I'm not even suspecting malicious intent, those researchers had the best intentions, unfortunately these are scientists, professors and the like, they shouldn't do a doctor's job. They may have taken the wrong studies to determine their "actual test" dosage. My 2 cents.
      PS Instead of hydroxychloroquine, I'd rather go natural and keep up the quercetin intake.

    • @thorman1742
      @thorman1742 4 года назад

      @@Herschel1738 And if you can spare a couple minutes, you can look it all up yourself, for instance look for recommended dosage, toxic dosage and lethal dosage; and "actual test" dosage.
      Those actual tests were conducted at Oxford University and are called Oxford RECOVERY tests; and at the WHO.

  • @stonedhomer621
    @stonedhomer621 4 года назад +208

    This year because of all the forrest loss we should forgo cutting down trees for Christmas and instead plant them. #notawaronxmas

    • @spooks196
      @spooks196 4 года назад +4

      @Gunsandrosalina Padtwo yeah it’s pretty dumb

    • @QueekHeadtaker
      @QueekHeadtaker 4 года назад +3

      @Gunsandrosalina Padtwo that will kill Santa Claus, and he is more important than Jesus to this society, #SaveSantaClaus

    • @firefly620
      @firefly620 4 года назад +20

      Noo you can't plant new trees! What if they fall down and explode?!

    • @spooks196
      @spooks196 4 года назад +7

      @@firefly620 oh yes I forgot, the commander in queef said so.

    • @BartvG88
      @BartvG88 4 года назад

      Actually if you cut down trees, you make more room to plant trees!

  • @AnnieRMcEwen
    @AnnieRMcEwen 4 года назад +32

    Love hearing Stephen's wife wheezing with laughter offstage. These Late Shows have kept my sanity intact for months - thank you!

    • @gregsmith7809
      @gregsmith7809 4 года назад

      How easily amused

    • @wltuck2456
      @wltuck2456 2 года назад

      trump knows nothing
      nothing but he does know
      the con man the crook
      they call it.

  • @chri2453
    @chri2453 4 года назад +80

    Steve, please do not leave us alone again, we need you!

  • @amandachallis5649
    @amandachallis5649 4 года назад +11

    “I don’t think science knows.” 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️

  • @ChandlerSomborac
    @ChandlerSomborac 4 года назад +104

    "I don't think science knows" coming from this supposed "president" whose lack of knowledge could fill a warehouse.

    • @cathieludemann5879
      @cathieludemann5879 4 года назад +3

      I hope his grandkids don't ask gramps for help with their homework!

    • @thebarbers2273
      @thebarbers2273 4 года назад +2

      @@cathieludemann5879 6x6 = give your lunch money to someone else to do your homework.....lol

    • @tomgraves6463
      @tomgraves6463 4 года назад +3

      *SCIOLIST*
      sci·o·list
      /ˈsīələst/
      noun
      ARCHAIC
      *a person who pretends to be knowledgeable and well informed.*

    • @thebarbers2273
      @thebarbers2273 4 года назад

      @@cathieludemann5879 growing Down a trump

    • @dntodo6749
      @dntodo6749 4 года назад

      He relies a lot on interstellar impulses sending genius inspiration. Of course, it's a level beyond physical science. duh.

  • @SUPERAFRASIABI89
    @SUPERAFRASIABI89 4 года назад +539

    “I don’t think science knows” -person who claimed there were airports in 1776

    • @amyreynolds3619
      @amyreynolds3619 4 года назад +21

      You win the best comment of the day award.

    • @sophierobinson2738
      @sophierobinson2738 4 года назад +9

      He said airports because he couldn't recognize the word he saw on the teleprompter and just used the first word the popped into his head.

    • @agf1700
      @agf1700 4 года назад +32

      And who also thought the Spanish Flu contributed to the ending of WWII!

    • @terryfuldsgaming7995
      @terryfuldsgaming7995 4 года назад +13

      Dont forget he said that to scientists...

    • @oldineamiller9007
      @oldineamiller9007 4 года назад

      He didn't say that. Watch the video again and listen carefully.

  • @224catlinc
    @224catlinc 4 года назад +18

    I am really laughing out loud at the Chris Evans jokes! Thank you!

  • @NovemberThreeThree
    @NovemberThreeThree 4 года назад +16

    I swear by the time we got to "chris evans sack" i couldnt breathe i was laughing so hard!

  • @Leprechaunproduction
    @Leprechaunproduction 4 года назад +48

    I wondered why the air in California seemed hazier today, and then remembered that Trump was in the state giving speeches.

  • @mclovin9578
    @mclovin9578 4 года назад +78

    He “thinks” he gets along with these dictators but in reality they’re playing him like the fool he is. 🙄

    • @sunshine3914
      @sunshine3914 4 года назад +6

      He’s actually scared shitless of them. Can’t really blame the coward.

    • @CloudsGirl7
      @CloudsGirl7 4 года назад +2

      Like a big, dumb cello.

    • @darthknightwingphoenix2081
      @darthknightwingphoenix2081 4 года назад +1

      @@CloudsGirl7 no, no, cellos are FAR classier than he is. He's getting played like a cheap kazoo.

    • @mclovin9578
      @mclovin9578 4 года назад

      Now that I think about it...maybe he's too stupid to be scared? Because those are some scary dudes..

  • @MrJonsonville5
    @MrJonsonville5 4 года назад +39

    Yes, California is on fire because of all the exploding trees.

  • @Kaleidoscopics
    @Kaleidoscopics 4 года назад +2

    Okay. I NEEDED this laughter. I am crying from laughing and I think it's 60% funny laughing/crying and 40% trying to keep it together but this was NEEDED. Missed this show the past 2 weeks, please never leave me again lol.

  • @dryaplesbrokentelevision656
    @dryaplesbrokentelevision656 4 года назад +136

    Hey, remember when Trump supporters said: "Nobody knew the pandemic was more serious than the flu?"
    TRUMP KNEW
    Y'all need a new excuse

    • @batintheattic7293
      @batintheattic7293 4 года назад +10

      Ah - it was mere hours ago when a Trumpy told me Covid19 was a hoax. So - even after he's been on tape saying it's real and it's bad - they're still insisting it's not. It's not a headless chicken situation. It's a mutant miracle chicken with transverse placement of head and arse, both of which have been cut off, and it's still running around.

    • @parnelpospahala7920
      @parnelpospahala7920 4 года назад +3

      His base, too.

    • @Crippycooke
      @Crippycooke 4 года назад +2

      They're already saying "he didn't lie" because the truth doesn't matter to them.

    • @ParadoxChiaki
      @ParadoxChiaki 4 года назад +1

      @Brick Schitthouse 40% of carriers are asymptomatic, at a loose estimate with information available publicly. Given the virulence of the strain, this means the apparently-unaffected population becomes a vector for more rapid and difficult-to-control spread. The fact that symptoms fail to manifest in some carriers actually serves to make the virus more deadly, since it exponentially increases the total number of infected people.
      Hope this information helps you! ^_^

  • @nomvuladlamini4618
    @nomvuladlamini4618 4 года назад +24

    Welcome back SC, I missed your wife giggling in the wings ... she immediately brings a smile to my face 🌻

  • @johnbritt7111
    @johnbritt7111 4 года назад +41

    As someone who wants to be a scientist, will admit science doesn't know everything, but climate change is not one of those things. We have know about climate change for decades and while many presidents have not put enough importance on climate change, Trump is the first just to strait up deny it

  • @lazyperfectionist1
    @lazyperfectionist1 4 года назад +11

    "If you go to _your_ polling place, I _promise_ you, we will go to _his."_
    😆🤣 The puns! Oh, god! The puns! 🤣

  • @VoiceOfIrrationality
    @VoiceOfIrrationality 4 года назад +123

    "I infected a crowd in Reno just to watch them die. When I think of what I've done, no one is better than I."

    • @elizabethwhite1068
      @elizabethwhite1068 4 года назад +8

      Lol. And my beautiful Reno told him to fck off. But it would be sacrilege to change the lyric to Minden.

    • @perceivingacting
      @perceivingacting 4 года назад +1

      U R ALL VILE

    • @VoiceOfIrrationality
      @VoiceOfIrrationality 4 года назад +6

      @johnny walker Pumpkin Gash, Johnny Cash even if it's Covid rash it's still rock and roll to me.

    • @BASEBALLHISTOR
      @BASEBALLHISTOR 4 года назад +2

      Biden voter

    • @stacywarren4739
      @stacywarren4739 4 года назад +1

      When I hear that whistle blowing I hang my head and cry

  • @Godric_71
    @Godric_71 4 года назад +91

    Stephen: I got really good at not doing my job.
    Me: you could get a job in the White House.

    • @hudson5610
      @hudson5610 4 года назад +1

      I was confused with this - was he talking about himself or another Trump tweet

    • @Permaclok
      @Permaclok 4 года назад +3

      @@hudson5610 he says he got good at being off work after 2 weeks, drawing parallel to the commander in chief doing sweet F.A.

    • @kskess
      @kskess 4 года назад

      I wish!

  • @ericjohnson6665
    @ericjohnson6665 4 года назад +17

    The closest I've ever come to seeing a tree 'explode' is ones that were hit by lightening and were split in half... no, no explosion... actually, when they die, nature's cleanup crew goes to work (bugs, mold, etc.) to break the tree down into mulch.

  • @michaeldwalker8055
    @michaeldwalker8055 4 года назад +2

    Literally,.. my neighbor does mow my lawn,... he has a tiny patch of grass, and mows mine with his,... says "It gives him something to do"... my neighbors are pretty dope.

  • @graciep.6984
    @graciep.6984 4 года назад +20

    Thank you, Stephen. I'm losing my mind trying to keep up with everything, and wondering why I'm doing it the whole damn time as I end up wanting to curl up in a corner somewhere and cry. The air quality is so bad that the schools are closed, and my lungs feel like someone sandpapered them. My chronic illness is flaring, raising my pain level and fatigue, and all in all it's a bit wearing on the soul. I'm one among many who wouldn't have held it together nearly as well without you, Seth, Trevor, and the few smartarse reporters who have a little fun with their story when they can.
    Quarantining alone the loneliness really gets to you after a while, as can the myriad natural and political disasters. I wish I could let you know the effect you have. You allow me to at least smile about subjects that previously had me in tears, without losing any of their importance and impact. It's going to take awhile before I can full-on laugh again, but you make this livable. Thank you for sticking it out when you must have had many moments where you felt that you were done. Thank you for my sanity.
    I hope you know just how important what you're doing really is.

    • @ixchelssong
      @ixchelssong 4 года назад

      Hang in there @Gracie P. We're with you, and also Please be safe!

  • @LuciaLight100
    @LuciaLight100 4 года назад +97

    One thing I do appreciate about Chump is that I can wake up every morning with my head held up high and knowing for a fact that I am smarter than the President of the United States. If that is not an ego booster than I don’t know what is......actually it’s kind of scary cause I count with my fingers....😨

    • @Khronogi
      @Khronogi 4 года назад +14

      Every /fucking/ day I wake, read what he's done, and facepalm. I could easily run the country better than that guy. For claiming to be a 'marketing genius', the guy is an absolute marketing failure. Dude couldn't lead the lid off a pickle jar.

    • @EugeneAxe
      @EugeneAxe 4 года назад +8

      Trump loves the poorly educated for a reason. They can relate to his idiocy.

    • @LuciaLight100
      @LuciaLight100 4 года назад +5

      Khronogi Seriously! My Dad yesterday who is republican and a Trump supporter, admitted that everyday there is something new with Trump. Some scandal and it’s exhausting lol.

    • @lucylouwho2876
      @lucylouwho2876 4 года назад

      @@EugeneAxe And they are easy to manipulate

    • @lucylouwho2876
      @lucylouwho2876 4 года назад +2

      @@LuciaLight100 Why the hell does he still support him. He is voting against his own interests.

  • @thenecrophymm6591
    @thenecrophymm6591 4 года назад +326

    "It'll get cooler" is, perhaps, the dumbest thing he has ever said, but, I mean, come on, there are so many. Yes, yes, it still gets cold in winter.
    Actually, i forgot about the exploding tree part...never mind.

    • @theodoreroberts3407
      @theodoreroberts3407 4 года назад +24

      Trump is brilliant! It gets cold in winter. Who knew! That explains snow! Wow, super moron.

    • @warrendourond7236
      @warrendourond7236 4 года назад +17

      No, the dumbest thing is when he told us he would have run into a school shooting and stopped the gun man, even if he himself couldn’t access a weapon. Accusing a security guard of being a coward because he wouldn’t take on a guy in a vest holding an AR15, while the guard had a revolver.

    • @kingjim713
      @kingjim713 4 года назад +11

      I would have to say the dumbest things he's ever said was when he questioned scientists about looking into "injecting disinfectant into the human body to fight coronavirus".
      I mean honestly we can do this ALL day.🤙

    • @trippykidblaze
      @trippykidblaze 4 года назад +7

      I would have to say my favorite dumb moment of Trump is on the axions interview and he said “it is what it is” to over 180,000+ ppl who have lost their lives to the virus. Next person keep it going

    • @kenbrown2808
      @kenbrown2808 4 года назад +3

      @@warrendourond7236 like anybody believes tRump would run anywhere.

  • @donaldb1
    @donaldb1 4 года назад +17

    Jean-Luc Gothard! Okay, that's a classy joke.

  • @dolphinsleap
    @dolphinsleap 4 года назад +35

    I swear, the more intelligent that Trump tries to sound, the dumber he actually sounds.

    • @eddievector3603
      @eddievector3603 4 года назад +1

      If you're actually intelligent, you don't proclaim it everytime you open your mouth, you let your actions speak for themselves. Exactly why Drumpf is a monumental idiot

  • @TheClaudz23
    @TheClaudz23 4 года назад +31

    Thank F$&@ you’re back! Please never leave us again. It’s been rough and omg we need you! You deserve a break, but man please don’t leave again anytime soon. You keep my slightly sane and I look forward to jumping into the sack again one day.

    • @chezmoi42
      @chezmoi42 4 года назад

      Not _that_ sack...?

  • @eseguerito2629
    @eseguerito2629 4 года назад +77

    EVERY disaster movie ever:
    • Scientist makes a warning that sounds alarmist and sensationalist.
    • Governent ignores it.
    • EVERYONE ON SCREEN DIES

  • @incognitro7634
    @incognitro7634 4 года назад +54

    Donald Trump - "I didn't want people to panic"......and that's why I'm using Panic as my electoral platform.

    • @ellynmacgregor8210
      @ellynmacgregor8210 4 года назад +3

      He didn't want to use up all of his panic points at once!

    • @sq1734
      @sq1734 4 года назад

      PANIC is an acronym

  • @tfox285
    @tfox285 4 года назад +42

    Ever notice the less someone knows on a subject the more they think they know.

    • @wendydabee
      @wendydabee 4 года назад +4

      Yes, that's called the Dunning-Kruger effect.

    • @alexanderholscher6548
      @alexanderholscher6548 3 года назад +1

      The ancient Oracle said that I was the wisest of all the Greeks. It is because I alone, of all the Greeks, know that I know nothing.
      -Socrates

  • @psibug565
    @psibug565 4 года назад +93

    I was walking through woodland the other day past Trees that had fallen down in a storm over a decade ago. Should I be worried about them exploding? They were damp with fungi growing on them and didn’t look that explosive but they have been there a while. Maybe I have to wait another couple of decades and then they will “suddenly” explode?
    This is up there with the man that said there were too many trees in a forest as a reason for the fires.

    • @RayWint-od9uj
      @RayWint-od9uj 4 года назад +16

      There is another idiot running Brazil. The news in England last night showed the rainforest burning, the Brazilian president who also said there is no covid said there are no fires.....there is an area the size of Scotland on fire with 5 firemen trying quite unsuccessfully to control it. Idiots running countries seems to be in fashion at the moment.

    • @CaptainFSU
      @CaptainFSU 4 года назад +5

      To be safe you should report them to the local bomb squad, can't be too careful!

    • @RayWint-od9uj
      @RayWint-od9uj 4 года назад +4

      @@CaptainFSU Don't report them to any government agency it will have been corrupted by the orangeheaded big mac muncher.

    • @19lhernandez
      @19lhernandez 4 года назад +3

      Psibug Thank you for the laugh, I needed it!!😂

    • @19lhernandez
      @19lhernandez 4 года назад +3

      Ray Wint Yes, Bolsonaro and trump should be best friends!!! Talk about MORONS!!

  • @kaymarpee
    @kaymarpee 4 года назад +67

    "It'll get cooler" "It'll go away with the warm weather"

    • @Ximisimi
      @Ximisimi 4 года назад +7

      “Ignoring my problems until it goes away” mentality 😤

    • @sq1734
      @sq1734 4 года назад

      Because change is coming. Watch this space.
      Come Nov 5th Covid will be old news too

  • @erictaylor5462
    @erictaylor5462 4 года назад +40

    "It will get cooler."
    He also said Covid-19 will go away in April.

    • @XenoLife
      @XenoLife 4 года назад +2

      A new low is reached every day with Trump

    • @bronztrooper9440
      @bronztrooper9440 4 года назад +3

      @@XenoLife
      I'd say that he digs himself deeper into his hole with every word, but he'd just claim to have hand-spurs and make someone else do the digging for him

    • @ixchelssong
      @ixchelssong 4 года назад

      Yes. But the difference is... it really does get cooler in the fall and winter! 😅

    • @erictaylor5462
      @erictaylor5462 4 года назад +1

      @@ixchelssong He was referring to climate change.

    • @lilaclizard4504
      @lilaclizard4504 4 года назад +1

      Go away in April when it gets cooler right?

  • @heavenearth282
    @heavenearth282 4 года назад +102

    A great chant would be “I LIED PEOPLE DIED” say that Trump

  • @jeskoog
    @jeskoog 4 года назад +47

    Drumpf's got to learn how to read. He'll have time in prison.

    • @everettamador9885
      @everettamador9885 4 года назад

      After his 3rd term as president...

    • @p.c.8412
      @p.c.8412 4 года назад

      @@fatguywithadrone1873 Take a pew. Let us pray @t

    • @p.c.8412
      @p.c.8412 4 года назад

      Take a pew. Let us pray @t

  • @bigchunk1
    @bigchunk1 4 года назад +12

    "If you go to your polling place, we will go to his." I lost it.

  • @joetaylor8602
    @joetaylor8602 4 года назад +97

    I’m sorry but “it’ll just start getting colder trust me” is one of the most ignorant things he’s said.

    • @beafreeall7953
      @beafreeall7953 4 года назад +11

      oh , I don't know...I think it is a flat out tie with thousands of other stupid things he says...:)

    • @SavvyToli
      @SavvyToli 4 года назад +1

      He might be hinting on the incoming Ice Age :p.

    • @Arltratlo
      @Arltratlo 4 года назад

      so, a fire stops burning at 85F... or 76F... please tell me why? here we had wild fires at 15°C... is it diffrent in the US, are the trees know when to burn and when not?

    • @theodoreroberts3407
      @theodoreroberts3407 4 года назад

      Didn't he get an award for stupid comments? He didn't!? He has the most.

    • @sunshine3914
      @sunshine3914 4 года назад +1

      He’s stupid ignorant, but not as stupid ignorant as his base who he’s playing to.

  • @lovelyskull3483
    @lovelyskull3483 4 года назад +28

    You are back ,thank goodness.☮️🇨🇦❤️

  • @whocares2087.1
    @whocares2087.1 4 года назад +78

    Colbert is back, the World is bearable again!

  • @richardbuckley1232
    @richardbuckley1232 4 года назад +14

    It’s almost like the “forest management” issue isn’t the issue at all?

  • @nadt5547
    @nadt5547 4 года назад +147

    Let's be honest. The only reason donnie went to California was so he could charge the taxpayers for his flight later to the rally.

    • @nadt5547
      @nadt5547 4 года назад +2

      @midniteryder I imagine he's taking the bulk of it.

  • @JackSparrow-gn9be
    @JackSparrow-gn9be 4 года назад +53

    I love the laughter of Stephen's wife Evelyn at his jokes. She should be Stephen's sidekick at the show. She's awesome

    • @Mevenda1
      @Mevenda1 4 года назад +3

      She’s so proud of him and I love it. Adorable. 🥰

    • @joannbowden6220
      @joannbowden6220 4 года назад +2

      Absolutely agree! She's adorable!

    • @JaydonvanGent
      @JaydonvanGent 4 года назад +1

      I think he should just keep working from home after the lockdown is over - the giggles coming in from the side are gold.

    • @jermainekngdom3154
      @jermainekngdom3154 4 года назад

      She is a writer. She is there all the time.

  • @OhNoNotFrank
    @OhNoNotFrank 4 года назад +31

    Sorry, my bad!
    I forgot to send California more rakes.

  • @K-Raoh
    @K-Raoh 4 года назад +14

    Trump wants forest management, but the forest would get fired regardless.

  • @englishworkout295
    @englishworkout295 4 года назад +105

    And of course...he's the only one not wearing a mask...

    • @tomvana4270
      @tomvana4270 4 года назад

      Big effing deal.

    • @sgtjohnson49
      @sgtjohnson49 4 года назад +16

      @@tomvana4270 It is if you think 200,000 unnecessary deaths is a big deal. But obviously you don't, so what do you think?

    • @oldineamiller9007
      @oldineamiller9007 4 года назад

      No he isn't the only one. Look the whole 30 min footage of that session. There were at least three others also not wearing a mask.

    • @ofiver
      @ofiver 4 года назад

      English Workout you need to look again. Lot’s of folks everywhere not donning a mask. Is it their right? Or is it their responsibility? Go figure.

    • @deesiobhan
      @deesiobhan 4 года назад +2

      I betTrump is autistic. He wont get professional haircuts, wont see a real doctor who might touch him and wont wear a mask.
      He has sensory processing disorder.

  • @fernandoghelfi9817
    @fernandoghelfi9817 4 года назад +202

    Thank God your back Stephen. Covid life was too boring without your jokes!

    • @abelis644
      @abelis644 4 года назад +6

      "you're"
      Please be smarter than a trumpturd!!!

    • @emerje0
      @emerje0 4 года назад +5

      @Bella Marie He announced he was taking the time off after the week of live RNC coverage. Basically this was the payoff for getting his staff to work late night for a week.

    • @fazergazer
      @fazergazer 4 года назад

      Yer not your

  • @tucci007da
    @tucci007da 4 года назад +104

    Man, that was a LOT of Chris Evans jokes. You really went for the low-hanging fruit on that mail sack gag. Mail sack gag.

    • @charliem7314
      @charliem7314 4 года назад +8

      A lot of people would like to Gag on that mail sack

    • @StephanieSmith-gf4vp
      @StephanieSmith-gf4vp 4 года назад +1

      I have to ask, Who is Chris Evans???

    • @darthknightwingphoenix2081
      @darthknightwingphoenix2081 4 года назад +3

      @@StephanieSmith-gf4vp the actor who played Captain America in the MCU. Real 10/10, GORGEOUS hunk of man-meat and with a winning personality to boot, and to top it all off HE'S CURRENTLY SINGLE.

    • @jessicamompoint1849
      @jessicamompoint1849 4 года назад +4

      @@darthknightwingphoenix2081 That penis pic was for some lucky lady. So I wish her the best.

    • @theinvisibleswordsman1196
      @theinvisibleswordsman1196 4 года назад +1

      We're just so desperate for some fun silly news rather than all death 20/20.

  • @DrinkinMars
    @DrinkinMars 4 года назад +6

    I love that that his wife is the audience, her quiet laughs are what makes this so much better because we know for sure Colbert enjoys them as well ❤

  • @rgwak
    @rgwak 4 года назад +560

    t'rump on wildfires: "We need to rake the floors."
    t'rump on hurricanes: "We need to nuke the storms."
    t'rump on the corona: "We need to inject bleach into our lungs."
    🤔😅😂🤣

    • @wayneurquhart1967
      @wayneurquhart1967 4 года назад +11

      I like how you laughed at your own jokes.

    • @xYouthAttackx
      @xYouthAttackx 4 года назад +50

      @@wayneurquhart1967 actually a few people agreed with him.

    • @wayneurquhart1967
      @wayneurquhart1967 4 года назад +5

      @@xYouthAttackx You mean to say Trump really said those things? I thought Ro G was joking.

    • @aking3624
      @aking3624 4 года назад +24

      If only his supporters listened...

    • @joshualagrimas9555
      @joshualagrimas9555 4 года назад +38

      @@wayneurquhart1967 he did. as well as nuking the hurricanes. Look it up.

  • @SweGrlMom
    @SweGrlMom 4 года назад +45

    Breaking through the Trump news, giving us *normal* *jokes.* 👍 Only Chris Evans could do that. He deserves a national holiday. ♥️♥️♥️♥️

    • @thesecretarytoowoombasouth4317
      @thesecretarytoowoombasouth4317 4 года назад +2

      Remember Jon Stewart complaining during the Bush2 years. He wanted to make dick jokes not political commentary

    • @SweGrlMom
      @SweGrlMom 4 года назад

      @@thesecretarytoowoombasouth4317 Good thing he left the show before Trump. I rather have him working on the Zadroga act and helping the survivors of 911 then getting a heart attack from rage on air trying to cover this %#&storm.

  • @NileshR12
    @NileshR12 4 года назад +11

    "What do we want? Disease!
    When do we want it? Within 14 days of this event!" - Bravi Stephen 😂😂👏🏽👏🏽

  • @Leaveblank62
    @Leaveblank62 4 года назад +4

    Wtf does “I don’t think science knows” even mean? 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

  • @3monthbender
    @3monthbender 4 года назад +21

    I love hearing all the laughter in the background.

  • @jino_moja
    @jino_moja 4 года назад +16

    Such a whiplash on the Chris Evans jokes, watching this after learning about the story from Phil de Franco's video.

    • @Tustin2121
      @Tustin2121 4 года назад +2

      Same. What’s the hell, Colbert writers??

  • @ladym.7594
    @ladym.7594 4 года назад +10

    THANK YOU FOR COMING BACK STEPHEN. We all were slowly falling into depression

  • @DSentomXHunta
    @DSentomXHunta 4 года назад +67

    "For some reason Trump and evil people just click"
    LOL

    • @negascoot23
      @negascoot23 4 года назад +4

      _I was meeting with Emperor Palpatine last night...I like him. I think he really wants to do good for the Galaxy. People tell him me not to like him I say "why shouldn't I like him?" So he's destroyed some planets. Lots of people destroy planets, you think the Republic was so innocent?"_

    • @DSentomXHunta
      @DSentomXHunta 4 года назад

      @@negascoot23 Lol haha
      "I mean look at Frieza, destroyed a couple of planets, but has a great sense of humour, great guy"

    • @negascoot23
      @negascoot23 4 года назад +2

      And don't forget the time he was invited to a state dinner in Latveria by Victor Von Doom--I hear they still exchange letters.
      While he publicly condemns HYDRA and supports SHIELD, he's stated on multiple occasions that there are good people on *both* sides of that conflict.
      But not every villain has turned Donald's head: He's been known to call Erik Lenscherr and the Brotherhood "freaks" and "weirdos"--he's even been seen on camera physically mocking them...
      ...but then, he says exactly the same thing about Charles Xavier and his X-Men.

  • @IamJoshuaElijahReese
    @IamJoshuaElijahReese 4 года назад +28

    6:40 The setup, callback, and punchline of that joke about it getting cooler and trees was pretty Hall of Fame level shit when you break that all the way down.

  • @earlofsmeg
    @earlofsmeg 4 года назад +117

    Old chants? Lock her up? Well, they are not the smartest of God's creatures.

    • @itwasagoodideaatthetime7980
      @itwasagoodideaatthetime7980 4 года назад +12

      Well they support Trump so its not really a big surprise.

    • @lillywho
      @lillywho 4 года назад +2

      These are no creatures of God /s
      Explains everything. 😝

    • @theweedman1978
      @theweedman1978 4 года назад +18

      If he wanted hrc in prison, he should of hired her into his administration

    • @earlofsmeg
      @earlofsmeg 4 года назад +3

      @@theweedman1978 😂😂

    • @abelis644
      @abelis644 4 года назад +2

      @@theweedman1978
      😁😂😂😂👏👏👏👍

  • @USUG0
    @USUG0 4 года назад +8

    meanwhile, his golf club in Scotland wanted to build sea walls citing climate change as cause.
    At least, he is consistent in his hypocrisy and lying

  • @vilstef6988
    @vilstef6988 4 года назад +10

    Isaac Asimov: . . . "Your ignorance is not as good as my knowledge."

  • @davidcanard9699
    @davidcanard9699 4 года назад +34

    Love it when you wife giggles at your jokes!

  • @kisanu5
    @kisanu5 4 года назад +49

    How do we know he is not “playing down” climate change to not create panic?

    • @D9xAbstract
      @D9xAbstract 4 года назад +4

      Now your paying attention.

    • @sunshine3914
      @sunshine3914 4 года назад +4

      Because he’s playing to his dumbasses like he always is.

    • @PeopleHealthTru
      @PeopleHealthTru 4 года назад

      @@D9xAbstract Genius Pres. Trump eliminated Obama-Biden's ISIS nation and their China superiority policy. Best historical employment before #GatesSoros Demonrat PlanDemic #Covid1984 deceptions, house arrests.

    • @sungsookyang8736
      @sungsookyang8736 4 года назад

      LOL 😆

    • @mariaborboleta7537
      @mariaborboleta7537 4 года назад

      He is not downplaying ... he is just ignoring it because it is not part of his agenda