Coming Out To Myself In Quaker Community

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Filming and Editing by Christopher Cuthrell
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Excerpt:
As the members of Sierra-Cascades Yearly Meeting of Friends wrestled with leaving their former yearly meeting over, among other issues, the question of LGBTQ+ inclusion, Erin Wilson felt a strong personal investment in the matter. "I realized that I was getting very defensive about the way that LGBTQ+ folks were being treated," she recalls. "It took several months for me to figure out, 'Oh! It’s because I’m not straight.'"
Erin currently identifies as bisexual. "I’m still figuring out what exactly that means," she says, and drawing upon her Quaker faith has been vital in that process. Take, for example, the testimony of equality: "If we’re all equal," she asks, "why does one aspect of our identity matter?"
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Transcript:
Being able to question things, which I think is important as part of Quaker faith anyway, was very helpful for me to figure out that...Huh? I'm not who I thought I was, and that's okay.
My name is Erin Wilson. I use she/her pronouns. I live in Tualatin, Oregon, and I am a direct member of Sierra-Cascades Yearly Meeting of Friends.
The history of Sierra-Cascades is challenging for me to name because I was not present for all of the formational aspects prior to becoming its own yearly meeting. There was a lot of tension within Northwest Yearly Meeting, which is the year the meeting that Sierra-Cascades split off of. I think there was a lot more going on, but the issue that they pinpointed it on was LGBTQ+ inclusion.
It was through all of that that I came out to myself because I grew up in evangelical culture where a woman is assumed straight and will end up married to a man. Through all of the things going on with the split and the church that I was a part of at the time, and all of the conversations happening, I realized that I was getting very defensive about the way that LGBTQ+ folks were being treated. And so it took several months for me to figure out, Oh, it's because I'm not straight!
It also became clear that when I really deconstructed my concept of sexuality and who I could or couldn't marry, there was no reason that I saw for me not to marry a woman other than that I just hadn't been in a relationship with a woman, and I had not been in a relationship with a man, so the possibilities were open. And so I've chosen the label bisexual, and I'm still figuring out what exactly that means.
Being able to use Quaker values to help me process that, it was important to me. I mean, I think of the testimony of equality, and that was something that was important to me with the whole experience of the conversation happening in Northwest Yearly Meeting that led to the split and then Sierra-Cascades formation, just knowing that if we're all equal, why does one aspect of our identity matter.
But as far as the the process with Sierra-Cascades, I think it was helpful for me to arrive at a place where I was affirming of others in their sexual orientations and gender identities to be able to say, Oh, well, what if mine is not what I have assumed my whole life? And being able to question things which I think is important as part of Quaker faith anyway, was very helpful for me to figure out that...Huh? I'm not who I thought I was, and that's okay.
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The views expressed in this video are of the speakers and do not necessarily reflect the views of Friends Journal or its collaborators.

[@Erin_Wilson_Studios]

It's good to hear your story, Erin (from another Erin Wilson in a different corner of the world.)

[@sentimentalbloke7586]

Thank you very much for your testament it is refreshing to hear another perspective to the faith.

[@marysuze]

YAY, ERIN!

[@annascott-hinkle2367]

awsome Erin!

Thanks. ❤

Please can you turn on the subtitles on this video?

[@Quakerspeak]

Thanks for asking - we tweaked a few places where we noticed the generated subtitles got it wrong (like Erin calling herself "Aaron") and turned those subtitles on now.