I took her “no one was there with me” comment to mean she had no one outside of “work” who was there with her to help her celebrate. Was she actually alone? Probably not, but she felt like she was.
I thought that it was obvious that she meant that. Like, she didn't have anyone in her personal life to share her success with. She wasn't alone, but she was lonely.
@@oliooh5647 True, but at the end of the day, Taylor helped her previous record label more than them helped her. Even back then her fans followed her because she wrote from her own life and still do, as she herself says, if she didn't have the writing skills and the almost her own diary concept, she wouldn't be this great. Her team didn't write her songs or literally kept in touch with her fans, it was all her and if you ask any swiftie, all of them will tell you that is why they follow her, the rest is the rest.
agree she was talking about being single and going home alone to her cats. Jack was going home to his GF Lena, Selena who was also there was probably going home to whoever she was dating at the time, Justin or the weekend or whoever.
This is SUCH a good topic for me. My dad is a narcissist, a “high functioning” alcoholic (meaning he doesn’t f-up his professional life-just his family life), and he’s a professor so he thinks he’s such an intellectual. I’ve been trying to get his approval my entire life and I’m 30! That need for his approval has trickled over into the rest of my life and it’s a really hard behavior to break.
Girl I literally could have written this myself. My dad is a business owner... meaning he can make his own hours.... and was the most dysfunctional functional alcoholic ever and I feel I’m just starting to give up on trying to make him happy and I’m 32. I truly know your pain. You ever go to ACOA? Go to their website and read “the laundry list”. I’m telling you.
Therapy would be great and also get as far as you can from your family because the whole dynamic is toxic... Not only your dad! You would get to know yourself and quit pleasing people!
She has always repulsed me. Just looking at her makes me shudder, how does someone who looks like that make it to all the red carpets and get coveted spots on tv and articles? When all the other females have to look perfect? It's because she's plugged into that white female media mafia and is BFFs with Taylor. Then she starts speaking and it's just one disgusting thing after anither about her sister, saying racial slurs around her ethnic co-workers etc.
@Renae 'molestation' is when an adult person sexually assaults a minor.. situations like that a 'molest-y' .. what she did could be described as fondling.. groping.. this is still ick . But it isnt molestation or criminally abusive..
She clearly was saying that she was lacking a close personal relationship when she hit the top. Jack Antonoff is a literal angel/genius and that was definitely not a snub.
Oh Shallon I literally binge watched your content the last few days. Funny side note: your last name Lester sounds like the German word Läster which means „gossiping“ 👀
I think her hyper-private relationship with Joe is a marker of that crossroad she's at where she's become so guarded in all parts of her life after the backlash for being so public for years.
She was so traumatized with what happened to the Dixie Chicks, I totally understand, I remember and it was horrible, they were bullied until they end their careers, then when she was at the top the Kanye incident and she thought they where booing at her, her worst nightmare came true. The need for approval is a trauma response and makes total sense with the eating disorder, ED are not about being thin, are about being in control.
Taylor needs approval cuz she had no friends all throughout her childhood and was bullied. She's traumatized by being hated, and thats why she craves people's approval and praise. Its not so much about self esteem as it is about being acknowledged.
That's not REALLY how that works though - that's definitely a valid dynamic but it's not a whole story. Lots of us got bullied in our youth and grew up needing approval because of it, but very few of us need it to the point where it's completely debilitating on that scale. She probably definitely felt low initially, but quite likely once she started getting praise she started needing to believe she was perfect or none of it was true - something along those lines, and that's not a typical response.
@@GoblinsAreAGirlsBestFriend And she gets such a lift out of revenge, doesn't matter if the other person was a human being or not, he (usually) disappointed or failed to "save" her, he must be punished.
I’m so sick of the “strong independent woman” narrative that convinces women that to be strong and independent means that you can’t have help and you can’t have relationships. Even James Bond gets a lover.
I have totally been in that place where I surround myself with "friends" to try and fix the loneliness I'm feeling, but its just masking the issue if those aren't real or deep connections. It's like look at me with all these people I'm not lonely anymore... right? But really you've never felt lonelier because being surrounded by people you have a shallow connection with, only highlights that missing link more. I think that's where Taylor is coming from, and it would explain why she is saying that of a time when her "squad" was in full force.
I totally have felt like that a few years ago, I thought being social would remedy my loneliness but it didn't at all, it just enhanced it. Ironically once I cut off all those surface level friendsships and worked on some things internally, I am now happier and more at peace being mostly alone! People confuse being lonely with being alone all the time when in fact they can exist exclusively of each other.
I loved the documentary!! I liked taylor but i never saw her in the light that i did in the doco. I was so surprised to see her upset about the Grammy Nom, you would think with all the success she has she would know by now she's talented and worthy. Totally agree with what you said about the doco only being from Taylor's side...and I agree with what you said about her not having anyone to talk to but I think she was meaning a romantic partner
Exactly. There's a difference between having friends and having a person you can run to. I have been there. I have *best friends *but when I have big news, apart from family I have nobody to call.
Tbh a sig other is just another type of best friend. There are some differences for sure but a sig other is not more significant than your best friends. In academic terms a significant other is friends and family ( partner included in that). In my humble opinion best friends are more important bc they’re are less societal expectations on the relationship so they tend to be stronger. If you call someone a good friend you could always run and tell them
I'm so glad you're covering this, I'm literally going nowhere in life because my unhealthy desire to please others is frickin paralyzing me into stagnation. I'm so afraid to make a move that I literally stopped making them. You make a great therapist tho girl I'm all ears on this one 👂
watching your videos has helped me escape my super toxic codependent relationship. you have no idea how much these videos have changed my life. thank you so much shallon ❤️
I can relate to Taylor in that I like to be in control, but when you haven't really had anyone that cared about you winning early on in life it's hard to relinquish that control. I don't really want people destroying what I tried so hard to build. Taylor has never struck me as someone with trust issues, but she obviously has them.
I love Taylor Swift so much; been a for more than 6 years and yes i still totally agree that she has some flaws she needs to work on. just cause you're a fan, doesn't mean you should cover up and make excuse for every single thing your fav celeb does. THEY ARE NOT FLAWLESS; remember that people!
I’m a huge (tattoos and everything lol) Taylor Swift fan and don’t understand how all these Taylor Swift fans can defend her more than themselves. Like wow. She is a person, not God. Lol
I’m convinced you’ve secretly gotten an advanced degree in psychology. You have so much wisdom on human behavior girl! I always gain so much insight from your videos. I would be interested in your take on Jessica Simpson’s new book!
1. I never believed those super famous friends were her true friends. It always struck me as looking like posing, (for mutual image benefits). 2. In the pop music world (also on the level with less famous artists) there is this practise for music collaborations to be marketed as ”I came together with these really cool by me chosen friends” when in reality it may just have been someone you were able to get a collaboration with. So it might actually be true that she has no true friends. 3. Even if it looked in the documenary as if Taylor had all the input on the music video it might have been the other way around. Her collaborator came up with everything. To take credit for other peoples work is one of the most common lies in the workplace I have read. Proabably this applies extra much to those artists that are appreciated for their (seeming) creativity. I know for instance it happens that artists take cred for other writers songs since it benefits everyone involved if the audience feel the songs are athentic outpooring from the singer.
I’ve been a T Swift fan ever since she started in country music. We are the same age and I felt like I grew up with her and her music as she stated in the documentary. I actually voted in favor of this video because I wanted to see your take on the situation and I feel like you did a wonderful job of dissecting everything. I watched the documentary and feel so sad for her. I feel like she needs to just take a break from the spotlight. Her heart doesn’t seem like it’s in it for the right reasons anymore. Like you said, I do wish we would have gotten more commentary from her team, family, or friends. Not just her perspective.
This, my dear Shallon is THE topic all of us women have to face and deal with it. Because most of us are being raise to be pleasers, to be givers and its so hard to say no and dont feel guilt if the person we are saying no to gets angry or upset. Its a fucking nightmare tbh.
I wanna say I love Taylor and have listened to everyone of her albums. Honestly I thought the documentary was pretty dry. Also? I thought it was super weird they brought up her moms cancer and we never heard from her mom? I would have learned to hear her mom speak about her battle thru cancer, seeing her daughter in the media, her eating disorder. It just felt like it didn’t go THERE. Even with her newest song “the man” I wish it would have went deeper...those lyrics could have been a little more mature but hey, I think Taylor is def starting to be more brave and I look forward to seeing her career she def ain’t going away
When she said she had no one to call i think she meant romantically- she recognised she had friends and family but that whole segment was about romantic relationships
It’s equally important for people to stop overestimating the value of their approval (given or withheld) to others. I’ve met more than one person who got his/her nose thrown out of joint because I was graciously okay with their not liking me. You’re ALLOWED not to like or approve of me and I’m allowed to give 0 f#cks about it. As long as you don’t use your negative feelings to justify treating me wrongly or unfairly, it’s all good.
I just randomly came over one of your videos, and now I’m just obsessed! Your videos are so interesting and I learn so much. Do you have a video about confrontations? How to stand up for yourself? Like with people that cut in line at stores. If someone cuts me off I get pissed off inside but I don’t do anything - I just let it happen. I just don’t know how to put my foot down? And many other situations I shouldn’t have to put up with. Likehow to get some more guts and not let people stomp all over you.
I just cringe everytime a celebrity comes out with their own documentaries...about themselves. Like can you BE more narcissistic? Ugh I just can’t, usually if docs are made on a celebrity it’s because they died and were music or movie icons. Those are interesting to watch but these cry-me-a-river super entitled documentaries are just not it .
I believe that too one of her Grandmas was an Opera singer her mom enabled her and her dad has bought her career I love that they are so supportive of her but she hasn’t seemed to really mature
yeah.. cuz her mom didn't drive her to multiple record labels since she was 11, she didn't have to write for a label after school every day for years, didn't sing at the bluebird, didn't meet Scott Bruschetta at bluebird and help build BMR from the ground up, didn't finally FINALLY get to write/release an album, film music videos, go on a radio tour then go take a test after, all before the age of 17 and her career took off. Nope. that was her dad.
I’m a Swiftie; I love Taylor and I’m a big fan. But Shallon’s criticism of her is not unwarranted and I enjoy hearing her thoughts on her. Taylor is not perfect (like any of us) and her hardcore fans need to calm down and get a life!
if you ever are looking for video topic ideas, i think a lot of people would love tips on how to be verbally witty/funny and think/speak so quickly on your feet. you're literally the best youtuber i've seen in this regard.
I liked the documentary a lot. I could relate in many ways when she was talking about need of approval, eating disorder (it can be hidden so well and I know that) and how she did the right thing when she spoke out about that politician.. I also noticed that she said smth Shallon used to say a lot.. I mean she said smth like a person freezes mentally at the age he/she becomes famous.. and she sort of did.. and I was like “OMG, does she watch Shallon?” Because Shallon used to say that people often freeze mentally at the age when they get some trauma and fame can be some kind of trauma..
I'm sure I'm older than the average person watching these videos. But I have to say I feel bad for these young artists who started out so young in their career and are still going. They aren't equipped with the proper tools to deal with all the attention, success, and don't have a good sense of self...examples Taylor, Selena Gomez, Justin Bieber, etc etc. It's a shame that they don't seem to have the proper people around them to keep them grounded and straighten them out when they screw up.
I am a huge Taylor fan!! I love her!! I’ve watched the documentary like 4 times now. BUT I like to hear other people’s opinions about her, even if it’s not the same as mine. I don’t get mad about it. The thing I don’t like is when people hate on Taylor for no reason, just bc people think it’s the cool thing to do to hate Taylor Swift. That I don’t like. But I like videos like this. Just thought I’d throw that out there. Not all Taylor fans are psychos! 😆 Also, she was talking about a husband or bf when she accepted her Grammy.
I personally feel like the whole point of this documentary was to hear only about Taylor, to experience her own version of the truth. Inserting people commenting on how good she is, how great of a songwriter she is, how much she deserves that Grammy would have defeat the whole meaning of the documentary and would have only kept pushing this narrative where Taylor needs the approval of others to exist!!!
Unpopular opinion from a non-stan: Reputation was actually a really great album, I really didn't expect to like it as much as I did. I think a lot of people wrote it off because Look What You Made Me Do was kinda abrasive, but in reality most of that album was about falling in love despite your reservations to do so. On the other hand, Lover was really underwhelming, it has a couple of interesting tracks but overall I expected so much more out of it.
I do wish TS a successful career. It is tiring to hear an extremely wealthy person having average joe problems. They have resource to overcome those situations.
ughhhhh I would absolutely love to meet you!!!🥺 I love all of your videos. So inspiring. I learn something new every time I watch you. I love how you can make a video but also have 2 different topics!
When you mentioned her saying "things that make you you like blah blah blah, and things that make me me like gay rights!" I couldn't help but find it hilarious that she looked a member of the LGBTQ community in the eyes and was like "so you know how emo kids are your thing and gay rights are mine?"
I think when she is talking about that she cannot share the moment that she won the Grammy is more in love way, she she had their friends and mom ( she actually mentioned there) I really feel that moment is when you want to have someone but you dont really have
I shockingly really related to this need of approval and the sense that I got was that perhaps it was the way she was raised. Perhaps her parents expected so much from her she never felt fully loved and accepted as she was and it was conditional. I felt that way growing up and still trying to heal from that. This could also be why she needs those awards so much- maybe she feels without those grammies, she’s not good enough. I personally never ever got the point of these awards. Is it not enough that you’re rich and famous? It’s sort of too much for artists to have to deal with and constantly compete. there should be a way to opt out of even being a part of it so you don’t feel shitty when you don’t get nominated. Music shouldn’t be about awards it’s not a sport, it’s ART. Some people can’t handle competition or losing (me 🤣) which is why I became an artist 👩🎤 🤣🤣🤣
I'd say the producers more like the chef and the singer is more like the writer of the recipe, the singer/artist says what they want writes it down and does the singing etc but its the producer who's creating the music, mixing everything, making it sound amazing with effects, EQ etc, giving the music tone and texture and detail the producers a massive part of the process and I can't believe she gave him no recognition.
She meant she didn't have a partner in a personal way. So much so that she mentions she had her mom, but that was it. Doesn't mean she disregards everyone else: her dad, her brother, her friends, the people she worked with... It's a personal thing.
I think what she meant by no one to call was more of like someone that had been there with her through her whole career and kind of climbed that WHOLE mountain with her
When Taylor said that she “wished she had someone to call” who she was talking about was wanting a boyfriend! She was not talking about her friends or family lol
i think she meant that she didn't have the person, in an emotional level, like a spouse or a romantic partner which had seen her go crazy while writing the lyrics, like when u win something, you'd wanna kiss someone or go home to relax with someone, but she didn't have that in that time
Am I the only one who gets “I work hard so I’m the best” vibe from Taylor Swift, especially after watching the documentary??? 🧐 it kinda bothers me, she came off very self-righteous
I was waiting for you to cover this. I think she was sad about the Grammys because she did really well at the People's Choice Awards, so most people assumed that she'd sweep at the Grammys
i truly get so turned off when celebs get all political. as if i need them to tell me who they’re voting for in order to make my own private decision. it’s one thing to promote charitable causes and things it’s another when they spew some holier than thou bs.
I think she comes off as a dictator bc she can’t like just go out. She’s a huge target to stalkers and stuff so everything she does has to be planned and exact
I dont agree with how this girl analyze things like words or emotions at least some of it 🤷🏻♀️.. i dont know. Over analyzing. Where taylor just simply thankful for her talent writing and not like shes not thankful for people that helped her along the way. She is. check the reasons why she did what she does then analyze, and not like she doesnt have someone to celebrate success or to high five with, she has those friends family, producers peers but what she meant is someone, a lover, a romantic relationship, geez that she can call up and share good news with. someone outside her work. And watching this video made me tired emotionally.
I think she is really talented but the documentary seemed really contrived. I wasn't convinced that her doing certain things was because it was because that's how she truly felt, but more because she needed to do it for other reasons. I'm not impressed.
Lol I can't stand Lena either but I agree about her voice. It's nice and I wanted to like her because she seemed different at first. I don't think Taylor is good friends with her "squad". It seems curated.
For all the Selena Gomez Fan: I’m a huge Selena Gomez fan too. It does brother me when Shallon says stuff that I’m like omg that can’t be true. But this is a channel where we can take what celebrities are doing or what Shallon is telling us that celebrities are doing and learn from it. The celebrities are the examples. Just take in the lesson. 😀 BTW Shallon, I adore you.
Even though I have friends and we are close. And family I can talk to. But even I feel alone and Taylor felt like that she had people but she probably didn’t feel like she could talk to them.
Taylor is a victim of her own behavior- all the friendships she makes are shallow which is why they don’t stick around to hear her sob story because she uses her friendships and ties as weapons in the media. Much like she did towards Katy Perry. Which I think she made up with Katy for public approval and of her peers.
I agree Lena is thee worst. I haven’t seen the Taylor doc, but maybe I will now. I like her lyrics, and her storytelling. Her interviews are always interesting too.
I feel guilty tbh because while watching the Grammy phonecall scene I felt like she was being slightly passive-agressive or something. I was expecting her to say that she didn't agree with it because it was certainly one of the albums of the year (I don't mean I expected her to make a scandal, just to speak up) and instead she did the "fine, fine. Guess I'll have to do better because this wasn't good enough" and I just felt like she wasn't believing in what she was saying herself. It just didn't seem absolutely real to me even with her tearing up and now I feel bad for it
I think when she said partner she meant romantic partner or someone close that's completely separate from the industry/her team? But for the rest yeah I agree, I loved old documentaries of Taylor, now it just feels so bitter
I’m gonna be real honest cause that’s my thing as well as yours and I feel like you might appreciate this comment. Basically I’m not a hater, so when you talk about these artists I feel like you do a better job at providing a lesson for your audience to get from the topic than I think you do about hitting the mark on what they takeaway is about the artist/celebrity’s truth. I agree that Taylor missed some stuff, but not in the miscalculated victimizing way and more of the I am still growing and I need to look back at this era and understand what this documentary could have used. Which is the doc could have used more creativity, and she didn’t have a lot of character growth in the present moment she was documenting. She could have added more voices I agree and she needs a therapist not just a great boyfriend. However, she definitely didn’t intend to be a dictator. I think the issue is that nobody around her is pointing out how she is not taking a breather to step back and just focusing on her music and promotion, rather than what people think negatively about her. She probably feels alone because she is so high at the top so people feel like they don’t need to tell her their thoughts and that maybe they shouldn’t. She even mentions somewhere, maybe in a interview or something that her mom had to tell her when she was right and wrong. That’s why she always considers her her best friend. Then again, we don’t know exactly what Tay is like, or any of these celebrities unless we lived with them for a few days:)
My only annoyance with the doc was that she seemed to tip toe around saying she was struggling with the mental health aspect of fame and getting help for it. She made it sound like she came to these healthy conclusions on her own when I think it would benefit a lot of her fans to say she went to therapy or whatever healing work she did to end being a people pleaser and learn to validate herself.
Haha oh you know it'd be like "There's a place in hell for women who tear down other women" (*sarcastic handjob motion*) Everyone tries to shame you when there's no relevant come back because you're kinda speaking the truth.
I know someone who styled her for a performance on a singing competition show. She is a monster behind the scenes. An abolsute monster. Fame has completely gone to her head and she treats everyone like trash. She is only nice to people who she believes is "on her level".
I’m in awe of how your dialogue just rolls off your tongue so effortlessly..and for thirty mINUTES! So wise and so witty.
Thank you. It's the thing I'm proudest of. But after I feel like I have a concussion!
I totally agree!!😍
Agreed she’s flawless when she’s speaking. and no edits necessary. Love the honesty in your videos. Don’t ever change. Love you so much
Absolutely.
I took her “no one was there with me” comment to mean she had no one outside of “work” who was there with her to help her celebrate. Was she actually alone? Probably not, but she felt like she was.
I thought that it was obvious that she meant that. Like, she didn't have anyone in her personal life to share her success with. She wasn't alone, but she was lonely.
Nah but she constantly claims it was all her, did you watch shallons video on taylors speech?
Oliwia capala She has never once said she’s the sole reason for her success. Not one single time has she said that. Stop pulling shit out of your ass.
@@oliooh5647 True, but at the end of the day, Taylor helped her previous record label more than them helped her. Even back then her fans followed her because she wrote from her own life and still do, as she herself says, if she didn't have the writing skills and the almost her own diary concept, she wouldn't be this great. Her team didn't write her songs or literally kept in touch with her fans, it was all her and if you ask any swiftie, all of them will tell you that is why they follow her, the rest is the rest.
agree she was talking about being single and going home alone to her cats. Jack was going home to his GF Lena, Selena who was also there was probably going home to whoever she was dating at the time, Justin or the weekend or whoever.
This is SUCH a good topic for me. My dad is a narcissist, a “high functioning” alcoholic (meaning he doesn’t f-up his professional life-just his family life), and he’s a professor so he thinks he’s such an intellectual. I’ve been trying to get his approval my entire life and I’m 30! That need for his approval has trickled over into the rest of my life and it’s a really hard behavior to break.
So relatable
Girl I literally could have written this myself. My dad is a business owner... meaning he can make his own hours.... and was the most dysfunctional functional alcoholic ever and I feel I’m just starting to give up on trying to make him happy and I’m 32.
I truly know your pain. You ever go to ACOA? Go to their website and read “the laundry list”. I’m telling you.
(ACOA = adult children of alcoholics.... and they picked the name “adult children” for a reason)
Therapy would help you break the approval cycle. I've been there.
Therapy would be great and also get as far as you can from your family because the whole dynamic is toxic... Not only your dad! You would get to know yourself and quit pleasing people!
Lena Dunham.....ugh. I can’t stand her.
same. she's a freak. still upset that not enough people know about the sister thing.
She has always repulsed me. Just looking at her makes me shudder, how does someone who looks like that make it to all the red carpets and get coveted spots on tv and articles? When all the other females have to look perfect? It's because she's plugged into that white female media mafia and is BFFs with Taylor. Then she starts speaking and it's just one disgusting thing after anither about her sister, saying racial slurs around her ethnic co-workers etc.
@Renae 'molestation' is when an adult person sexually assaults a minor.. situations like that a 'molest-y' .. what she did could be described as fondling.. groping.. this is still ick . But it isnt molestation or criminally abusive..
Ugh me too, Her fake feminist just rubs me in a wrong way like seriously
Pretty sure she also said she wished she'd had an abortion. 🤮
She clearly was saying that she was lacking a close personal relationship when she hit the top. Jack Antonoff is a literal angel/genius and that was definitely not a snub.
I felt that too. I get the impression that she’s not someone who has a load of guy friends and that he’s a professional friend
and a boyfriend. thats what i think she ment too
Isis Lopez is her mom not enough?
Jenelle Arp I don’t think her mom is enough! I think shes missing that male intimacy, definitely a part her mom can’t fill.
"YOU have to like yourself, because then, you become bulletproof". Love how you simply nail things. Love your authenticity too!!
Oh Shallon I literally binge watched your content the last few days. Funny side note: your last name Lester sounds like the German word Läster which means „gossiping“ 👀
True
Love that 😅
Lester is an Anglo Saxon name from Leicester
lol 😂
I think her hyper-private relationship with Joe is a marker of that crossroad she's at where she's become so guarded in all parts of her life after the backlash for being so public for years.
it's a marker of her closet lesbian thing
She finally learned and after years this is the only successful relationship.
Some of her exes who have been "blessed" with songs about how they failed to "save" her have also become pretty guarded, just sayin'.
She was so traumatized with what happened to the Dixie Chicks, I totally understand, I remember and it was horrible, they were bullied until they end their careers, then when she was at the top the Kanye incident and she thought they where booing at her, her worst nightmare came true.
The need for approval is a trauma response and makes total sense with the eating disorder, ED are not about being thin, are about being in control.
Taylor needs approval cuz she had no friends all throughout her childhood and was bullied. She's traumatized by being hated, and thats why she craves people's approval and praise. Its not so much about self esteem as it is about being acknowledged.
That's not REALLY how that works though - that's definitely a valid dynamic but it's not a whole story. Lots of us got bullied in our youth and grew up needing approval because of it, but very few of us need it to the point where it's completely debilitating on that scale. She probably definitely felt low initially, but quite likely once she started getting praise she started needing to believe she was perfect or none of it was true - something along those lines, and that's not a typical response.
@@GoblinsAreAGirlsBestFriend And she gets such a lift out of revenge, doesn't matter if the other person was a human being or not, he (usually) disappointed or failed to "save" her, he must be punished.
I’m here for Shallon calling Lena Dunham a toad lol
I absolutely loath Lena Dunham.... She is garbage fire of the highest order and I am delighted that Shallon feels the same way!
At 27 years old I'm still struggling with seeking validation from everyone and being worried about what people thinks about me. 🤦🏼
Same girl, I'm almost 32. I thought I'd "grow out" of it by now, like my mom said. Liiiiiies!!! 😖😵
Taylor clearly missed when Chance said, “Just because I’m independent doesn’t mean I did it alone!” 🙄
I’m so sick of the “strong independent woman” narrative that convinces women that to be strong and independent means that you can’t have help and you can’t have relationships. Even James Bond gets a lover.
I have totally been in that place where I surround myself with "friends" to try and fix the loneliness I'm feeling, but its just masking the issue if those aren't real or deep connections. It's like look at me with all these people I'm not lonely anymore... right? But really you've never felt lonelier because being surrounded by people you have a shallow connection with, only highlights that missing link more. I think that's where Taylor is coming from, and it would explain why she is saying that of a time when her "squad" was in full force.
I totally have felt like that a few years ago, I thought being social would remedy my loneliness but it didn't at all, it just enhanced it. Ironically once I cut off all those surface level friendsships and worked on some things internally, I am now happier and more at peace being mostly alone! People confuse being lonely with being alone all the time when in fact they can exist exclusively of each other.
Taylor needs to focus on what she does have including a very supportive mom.
14 mins: I think what she meant is she didn’t have a partner as in a romantic one, like a life partner
Emily Blankenship yeah she meant a bf or husband.
I also think so. She said she was at the peak but did not know who to call. I have been there. Where I have friends but I am lonely.
I loved the documentary!! I liked taylor but i never saw her in the light that i did in the doco. I was so surprised to see her upset about the Grammy Nom, you would think with all the success she has she would know by now she's talented and worthy. Totally agree with what you said about the doco only being from Taylor's side...and I agree with what you said about her not having anyone to talk to but I think she was meaning a romantic partner
I think you misinterpreted Taylor’s mountain top reference. She was talking about a significant other.
Exactly. There's a difference between having friends and having a person you can run to. I have been there. I have *best friends *but when I have big news, apart from family I have nobody to call.
That’s what i got too. That she wanted to share it with someone.
Tbh a sig other is just another type of best friend. There are some differences for sure but a sig other is not more significant than your best friends. In academic terms a significant other is friends and family ( partner included in that). In my humble opinion best friends are more important bc they’re are less societal expectations on the relationship so they tend to be stronger. If you call someone a good friend you could always run and tell them
I'm so glad you're covering this, I'm literally going nowhere in life because my unhealthy desire to please others is frickin paralyzing me into stagnation. I'm so afraid to make a move that I literally stopped making them. You make a great therapist tho girl I'm all ears on this one 👂
watching your videos has helped me escape my super toxic codependent relationship. you have no idea how much these videos have changed my life. thank you so much shallon ❤️
Legit, YOU GUYS have changed MY life. So right back atcha, baby ;)
What happened between Taylor and Karlie Kloss? I always wondered...
@@Well_Ill_Be_GodDangled do shut up she is straight
I always felt she has love addiction. All her insecurities and people pleasing traits screams codependency in a way.
I can relate to Taylor in that I like to be in control, but when you haven't really had anyone that cared about you winning early on in life it's hard to relinquish that control. I don't really want people destroying what I tried so hard to build. Taylor has never struck me as someone with trust issues, but she obviously has them.
Nobody:
Not even shallon:
Shallons yt video suggestion in the middle of the video: "kidney thief!!"
😂😂😂 I saw that too
I love Taylor Swift so much; been a for more than 6 years and yes i still totally agree that she has some flaws she needs to work on. just cause you're a fan, doesn't mean you should cover up and make excuse for every single thing your fav celeb does. THEY ARE NOT FLAWLESS; remember that people!
I’m a huge (tattoos and everything lol) Taylor Swift fan and don’t understand how all these Taylor Swift fans can defend her more than themselves. Like wow. She is a person, not God. Lol
True
They live vicariously through her, and they both need to fix their own issues. Some people sadly never grow up mentally/emotionally.
I’m convinced you’ve secretly gotten an advanced degree in psychology. You have so much wisdom on human behavior girl! I always gain so much insight from your videos. I would be interested in your take on Jessica Simpson’s new book!
1. I never believed those super famous friends were her true friends. It always struck me as looking like posing, (for mutual image benefits). 2. In the pop music world (also on the level with less famous artists) there is this practise for music collaborations to be marketed as ”I came together with these really cool by me chosen friends” when in reality it may just have been someone you were able to get a collaboration with. So it might actually be true that she has no true friends. 3. Even if it looked in the documenary as if Taylor had all the input on the music video it might have been the other way around. Her collaborator came up with everything. To take credit for other peoples work is one of the most common lies in the workplace I have read. Proabably this applies extra much to those artists that are appreciated for their (seeming) creativity. I know for instance it happens that artists take cred for other writers songs since it benefits everyone involved if the audience feel the songs are athentic outpooring from the singer.
Because it’s totally “brave” to stand up for yourself once you have hundreds of millions of dollars behind you 👀
I’ve been a T Swift fan ever since she started in country music. We are the same age and I felt like I grew up with her and her music as she stated in the documentary. I actually voted in favor of this video because I wanted to see your take on the situation and I feel like you did a wonderful job of dissecting everything.
I watched the documentary and feel so sad for her. I feel like she needs to just take a break from the spotlight. Her heart doesn’t seem like it’s in it for the right reasons anymore. Like you said, I do wish we would have gotten more commentary from her team, family, or friends. Not just her perspective.
It's so funny that Taylor said she's all about gay rights to Brendon Urie who's bi-sexual and talked about it openly before it was "cool"
This, my dear Shallon is THE topic all of us women have to face and deal with it. Because most of us are being raise to be pleasers, to be givers and its so hard to say no and dont feel guilt if the person we are saying no to gets angry or upset. Its a fucking nightmare tbh.
Shallon is right. Taylor should have had others on the documentary talking.
I wanna say I love Taylor and have listened to everyone of her albums. Honestly I thought the documentary was pretty dry. Also? I thought it was super weird they brought up her moms cancer and we never heard from her mom? I would have learned to hear her mom speak about her battle thru cancer, seeing her daughter in the media, her eating disorder. It just felt like it didn’t go THERE. Even with her newest song “the man” I wish it would have went deeper...those lyrics could have been a little more mature but hey, I think Taylor is def starting to be more brave and I look forward to seeing her career she def ain’t going away
When she said she had no one to call i think she meant romantically- she recognised she had friends and family but that whole segment was about romantic relationships
It’s equally important for people to stop overestimating the value of their approval (given or withheld) to others. I’ve met more than one person who got his/her nose thrown out of joint because I was graciously okay with their not liking me. You’re ALLOWED not to like or approve of me and I’m allowed to give 0 f#cks about it. As long as you don’t use your negative feelings to justify treating me wrongly or unfairly, it’s all good.
I just randomly came over one of your videos, and now I’m just obsessed! Your videos are so interesting and I learn so much. Do you have a video about confrontations? How to stand up for yourself? Like with people that cut in line at stores. If someone cuts me off I get pissed off inside but I don’t do anything - I just let it happen. I just don’t know how to put my foot down? And many other situations I shouldn’t have to put up with. Likehow to get some more guts and not let people stomp all over you.
I just cringe everytime a celebrity comes out with their own documentaries...about themselves. Like can you BE more narcissistic? Ugh I just can’t, usually if docs are made on a celebrity it’s because they died and were music or movie icons. Those are interesting to watch but these cry-me-a-river super entitled documentaries are just not it .
I completely agree with this statement. 👌🏻
Shallon, you're seriously amazing. I'm so glad you decided to make videos and bless us with your advice and intelligence
Taylor grew up privileged. If it weren’t for her dad she wouldn’t be where she is. Next
I believe that too one of her Grandmas was an Opera singer her mom enabled her and her dad has bought her career I love that they are so supportive of her but she hasn’t seemed to really mature
yeah.. cuz her mom didn't drive her to multiple record labels since she was 11, she didn't have to write for a label after school every day for years, didn't sing at the bluebird, didn't meet Scott Bruschetta at bluebird and help build BMR from the ground up, didn't finally FINALLY get to write/release an album, film music videos, go on a radio tour then go take a test after, all before the age of 17 and her career took off. Nope. that was her dad.
I’m a Swiftie; I love Taylor and I’m a big fan. But Shallon’s criticism of her is not unwarranted and I enjoy hearing her thoughts on her. Taylor is not perfect (like any of us) and her hardcore fans need to calm down and get a life!
if you ever are looking for video topic ideas, i think a lot of people would love tips on how to be verbally witty/funny and think/speak so quickly on your feet. you're literally the best youtuber i've seen in this regard.
She meant she didn't have a boyfriend to share the win with when she won lol kinda obvious
I think by her sying that she had no one to call she meant boyfriend, that she didn't have a partner to share her excitement with.
I liked the documentary a lot. I could relate in many ways when she was talking about need of approval, eating disorder (it can be hidden so well and I know that) and how she did the right thing when she spoke out about that politician.. I also noticed that she said smth Shallon used to say a lot.. I mean she said smth like a person freezes mentally at the age he/she becomes famous.. and she sort of did.. and I was like “OMG, does she watch Shallon?” Because Shallon used to say that people often freeze mentally at the age when they get some trauma and fame can be some kind of trauma..
I'm sure I'm older than the average person watching these videos. But I have to say I feel bad for these young artists who started out so young in their career and are still going. They aren't equipped with the proper tools to deal with all the attention, success, and don't have a good sense of self...examples Taylor, Selena Gomez, Justin Bieber, etc etc. It's a shame that they don't seem to have the proper people around them to keep them grounded and straighten them out when they screw up.
I am a huge Taylor fan!! I love her!! I’ve watched the documentary like 4 times now. BUT I like to hear other people’s opinions about her, even if it’s not the same as mine. I don’t get mad about it. The thing I don’t like is when people hate on Taylor for no reason, just bc people think it’s the cool thing to do to hate Taylor Swift. That I don’t like. But I like videos like this. Just thought I’d throw that out there. Not all Taylor fans are psychos! 😆
Also, she was talking about a husband or bf when she accepted her Grammy.
As if I didn’t love you anymore you had went off on Lena Dunham 😂😂😂❤️❤️❤️
I honestly liked the documentary more than I thought.
Your hair looks really good
After all these years, I hardly ever change a Taylor Swift song.
Came back to this video because I needed a refresher.
I personally feel like the whole point of this documentary was to hear only about Taylor, to experience her own version of the truth. Inserting people commenting on how good she is, how great of a songwriter she is, how much she deserves that Grammy would have defeat the whole meaning of the documentary and would have only kept pushing this narrative where Taylor needs the approval of others to exist!!!
Unpopular opinion from a non-stan: Reputation was actually a really great album, I really didn't expect to like it as much as I did. I think a lot of people wrote it off because Look What You Made Me Do was kinda abrasive, but in reality most of that album was about falling in love despite your reservations to do so. On the other hand, Lover was really underwhelming, it has a couple of interesting tracks but overall I expected so much more out of it.
Also... she won album of the year in February 2016, when she was STILL dating Calvin Harris, so she definitely had someone to call...
You’re so eloquent and well spoken Shallon!!
Love you Shallon! Thank you for your awesome charisma and all the sauce you put into every video ❤️
I do wish TS a successful career. It is tiring to hear an extremely wealthy person having average joe problems. They have resource to overcome those situations.
ughhhhh I would absolutely love to meet you!!!🥺 I love all of your videos. So inspiring. I learn something new every time I watch you. I love how you can make a video but also have 2 different topics!
When you mentioned her saying "things that make you you like blah blah blah, and things that make me me like gay rights!" I couldn't help but find it hilarious that she looked a member of the LGBTQ community in the eyes and was like "so you know how emo kids are your thing and gay rights are mine?"
'' keep it up, THANKS!'' lol I laughed out loud
I think when she is talking about that she cannot share the moment that she won the Grammy is more in love way, she she had their friends and mom ( she actually mentioned there) I really feel that moment is when you want to have someone but you dont really have
Her song writing is so simple, idk why she gets so much praise. Plus she rips lyrics a lot from other less popular artists.
I shockingly really related to this need of approval and the sense that I got was that perhaps it was the way she was raised. Perhaps her parents expected so much from her she never felt fully loved and accepted as she was and it was conditional. I felt that way growing up and still trying to heal from that. This could also be why she needs those awards so much- maybe she feels without those grammies, she’s not good enough.
I personally never ever got the point of these awards. Is it not enough that you’re rich and famous? It’s sort of too much for artists to have to deal with and constantly compete. there should be a way to opt out of even being a part of it so you don’t feel shitty when you don’t get nominated. Music shouldn’t be about awards it’s not a sport, it’s ART. Some people can’t handle competition or losing (me 🤣) which is why I became an artist 👩🎤 🤣🤣🤣
Great video Shallon 😀. As with all these celebrities they are very insecure and hide their insecurities in a myriad of ways 🙂
I'd say the producers more like the chef and the singer is more like the writer of the recipe, the singer/artist says what they want writes it down and does the singing etc but its the producer who's creating the music, mixing everything, making it sound amazing with effects, EQ etc, giving the music tone and texture and detail the producers a massive part of the process and I can't believe she gave him no recognition.
She meant she didn't have a partner in a personal way. So much so that she mentions she had her mom, but that was it. Doesn't mean she disregards everyone else: her dad, her brother, her friends, the people she worked with... It's a personal thing.
I think what she meant by no one to call was more of like someone that had been there with her through her whole career and kind of climbed that WHOLE mountain with her
When Taylor said that she “wished she had someone to call” who she was talking about was wanting a boyfriend! She was not talking about her friends or family lol
i think she meant that she didn't have the person, in an emotional level, like a spouse or a romantic partner which had seen her go crazy while writing the lyrics, like when u win something, you'd wanna kiss someone or go home to relax with someone, but she didn't have that in that time
Am I the only one who gets “I work hard so I’m the best” vibe from Taylor Swift, especially after watching the documentary??? 🧐 it kinda bothers me, she came off very self-righteous
yeeeeeeeeess like she can be a decent person but she seems very self righteous
I was waiting for you to cover this. I think she was sad about the Grammys because she did really well at the People's Choice Awards, so most people assumed that she'd sweep at the Grammys
I think its also her stans that make people dislike her
90 minutes of pushups 😂 That's gold.
Her parents probably haven't given her affection unconditionally and praised her only when she succeeded.
i truly get so turned off when celebs get all political. as if i need them to tell me who they’re voting for in order to make my own private decision. it’s one thing to promote charitable causes and things it’s another when they spew some holier than thou bs.
who else thinks this doc was fake? It was Taylor trying to prove to the world how "real" she is, but then looking faker than ever 🤣
I think she comes off as a dictator bc she can’t like just go out. She’s a huge target to stalkers and stuff so everything she does has to be planned and exact
Now I don't have to watch her doc! Thanks Shallon!!!
Yesss get your money bae!!
I dont agree with how this girl analyze things like words or emotions at least some of it 🤷🏻♀️.. i dont know. Over analyzing. Where taylor just simply thankful for her talent writing and not like shes not thankful for people that helped her along the way. She is. check the reasons why she did what she does then analyze, and not like she doesnt have someone to celebrate success or to high five with, she has those friends family, producers peers but what she meant is someone, a lover, a romantic relationship, geez that she can call up and share good news with. someone outside her work. And watching this video made me tired emotionally.
The lack of other people included in the documentary made me wonder if Taylor has any friends. I found that weird.
I think she is really talented but the documentary seemed really contrived. I wasn't convinced that her doing certain things was because it was because that's how she truly felt, but more because she needed to do it for other reasons. I'm not impressed.
Lol I can't stand Lena either but I agree about her voice. It's nice and I wanted to like her because she seemed different at first. I don't think Taylor is good friends with her "squad". It seems curated.
I feel like Taylor meant she has no one close to her to share that moment with because she pushed them away and only obsessed over the album.
For all the Selena Gomez Fan: I’m a huge Selena Gomez fan too. It does brother me when Shallon says stuff that I’m like omg that can’t be true. But this is a channel where we can take what celebrities are doing or what Shallon is telling us that celebrities are doing and learn from it. The celebrities are the examples. Just take in the lesson. 😀
BTW Shallon, I adore you.
Even though I have friends and we are close. And family I can talk to. But even I feel alone and Taylor felt like that she had people but she probably didn’t feel like she could talk to them.
I loved this video.
I think what she meant by I don’t have anyone after she won the award was more related to friends etc. not music related people
Taylor is a victim of her own behavior- all the friendships she makes are shallow which is why they don’t stick around to hear her sob story because she uses her friendships and ties as weapons in the media. Much like she did towards Katy Perry. Which I think she made up with Katy for public approval and of her peers.
I agree Lena is thee worst. I haven’t seen the Taylor doc, but maybe I will now. I like her lyrics, and her storytelling. Her interviews are always interesting too.
I feel guilty tbh because while watching the Grammy phonecall scene I felt like she was being slightly passive-agressive or something. I was expecting her to say that she didn't agree with it because it was certainly one of the albums of the year (I don't mean I expected her to make a scandal, just to speak up) and instead she did the "fine, fine. Guess I'll have to do better because this wasn't good enough" and I just felt like she wasn't believing in what she was saying herself. It just didn't seem absolutely real to me even with her tearing up and now I feel bad for it
💜
I think when she said partner she meant romantic partner or someone close that's completely separate from the industry/her team? But for the rest yeah I agree, I loved old documentaries of Taylor, now it just feels so bitter
I’m gonna be real honest cause that’s my thing as well as yours and I feel like you might appreciate this comment. Basically I’m not a hater, so when you talk about these artists I feel like you do a better job at providing a lesson for your audience to get from the topic than I think you do about hitting the mark on what they takeaway is about the artist/celebrity’s truth. I agree that Taylor missed some stuff, but not in the miscalculated victimizing way and more of the I am still growing and I need to look back at this era and understand what this documentary could have used. Which is the doc could have used more creativity, and she didn’t have a lot of character growth in the present moment she was documenting. She could have added more voices I agree and she needs a therapist not just a great boyfriend. However, she definitely didn’t intend to be a dictator. I think the issue is that nobody around her is pointing out how she is not taking a breather to step back and just focusing on her music and promotion, rather than what people think negatively about her. She probably feels alone because she is so high at the top so people feel like they don’t need to tell her their thoughts and that maybe they shouldn’t. She even mentions somewhere, maybe in a interview or something that her mom had to tell her when she was right and wrong. That’s why she always considers her her best friend. Then again, we don’t know exactly what Tay is like, or any of these celebrities unless we lived with them for a few days:)
My only annoyance with the doc was that she seemed to tip toe around saying she was struggling with the mental health aspect of fame and getting help for it. She made it sound like she came to these healthy conclusions on her own when I think it would benefit a lot of her fans to say she went to therapy or whatever healing work she did to end being a people pleaser and learn to validate herself.
Would love to see Taylor comment on one of your vids 🤣😜
Haha oh you know it'd be like "There's a place in hell for women who tear down other women" (*sarcastic handjob motion*) Everyone tries to shame you when there's no relevant come back because you're kinda speaking the truth.
I know someone who styled her for a performance on a singing competition show. She is a monster behind the scenes. An abolsute monster. Fame has completely gone to her head and she treats everyone like trash. She is only nice to people who she believes is "on her level".
I dont even care about her, but my friends are big fans. And after all these years, Taylor makes me actually tired.