INFPs do not have Ne in the way ENFPs or ENTPs do so I consider it misleading to say you do, thats why instead I say you are Np types. I see more Ni in INFPs in flow and Ne is more something inspirational to an INFP :)
Hay Erik, Eric here, fellow INFP. I've gone through alot of situations where I felt trapped or mistreated but growing up iv always cared about people. I could always see the light but it really made me blind to all the mud some people wair. And this was back in the mid to late 90s were people had a lot of different options than thay do now. Atlest the people I know. So when I stop just looking at just the light in people, it really took me a long time to except the fact that someone people are just out to hurt you in some way.... I spent a really long time barely talking to anyone. But it hit the hardest when I noticed it in my friends and family. They were eather inpatient with me or trying to get me to "cheer up" in all the wrong ways. Then one day, depressed unable to even want to feel happy. There was somone at school, who I barely noticed which if you know us, you know not much slips our gaze. So for this girl to go almost completely unnoticed at school was unheard of. But she was crying in the corner. Of course my first reaction was to go see what was up. I bent down, and to her left I noticed her notebook coverd in some drink. I don't remember which drink. It was opened to one her drawings she made of herself in almost a ☯️ Mashup of her and well a more unpleasant side of her. I could see that light drawn right in front of my eyes but it was so beautifully combined with some of her darkest side, and like a flash of inspiration hit. I wanted to know everything about this woman and about how that art made her feel I could already tell she put so much passion into it, just by how sad she was to see it ruined. But the want to know why people see themselves or others as dark and light, good and evil, ☯️. Why is the real reason why people want to hurt other, and the same in reverse. What drives me to want to help those people who hurt others. For the longest time I was still so blind. And I'm constantly working on myself and my relationships since that day. I only learned I was an INFP this year. Witch just go's to show you there's still so much to learn.
Wow after watching this video I feel like you’re the only one who understands me lol. I don’t think I even understood until now. I’ve been cocooning for 3 years and I’m still trying new things and putting myself out there. It’s been exhausting, but I keep on trying. I’m 44 and I still feel like I haven’t lived my purpose. I feel misunderstood by friends and family and they really don’t understand what’s going on with me. I’m still a caterpillar at this stage, but everyday I’m taking steps toward what I like and what brings me joy. I thought I was just being weird cuz I stopped caring about what others think, I stopped being present on social media, and I also stopped socializing with certain people that I used to be really close to. Thanks for the video! I feel like I should watch it once a week just to validate my existence and not get too down about the process.
As an INFP, I’m always in a state of flux between seeing the world as either stunningly beautiful or existentially horrifying... I hope one day to be able to find the Balance between those two realities so that I can move through life with grace and intrinsic energy rather than feeling so overwhelmed and anxious all the time
I am a 45 year old INFP. I have always had long periods of time where I “cocoon” and go into isolation. I chose to not keep close friends because the stimulus of interaction is to much for me most days. I require lots of alone time, with as limited stimuli as possible. Very dim lit room, small fan running, blanket and no other noise. If I bypass my DAILY cocoon (I call it cave) time then I become angry and frustrated towards everything and everyone. I do best in nature and in my own thoughts. The sun light adversely effects me so I block it all out of my home. I’ve always thought of myself as the single “witch” that lives on the hill in some lord of the rings realm. ♥️
Um...this is me to a "T"...except the witch part. I would be the fairy...but we are similar and it's comforting to know someone else in this world understands.
I'm a 71 yr old INFP and am currently cocooning. I have just left an 18 year relationship and have moved to a different city. I was never aware of the Myers-Briggs personality types until recently and I think it is going to change my life. I have never felt confident or sure of anything and nothing lasts for me. The constantly changing them absolutely fits my life. And now I am just exhausted but really happy to find your videos and others about the INFP type. I always thought I was just uniquely and completely flawed - and now I see my life story portrayed not as a flaw but as a personality type, This is very freeing and I am cocooning to make sense of it all. I have experienced this cycle you describe I would say about every 10 years. I'm pretty happy now in spite of being sort of in limbo - in between most everything, I don't think I have ever known another INFP. For sure my family and partners have been opposites. I would like to try an INFP or at least similar for a partnership - not sure how to find them. A hilarious note - on a dating website that supposedly pairs you up with good matches - I consistently get no matches. Ha! No kidding. I would rather be alone though than with people that don't understand me.
Hello, Jan of the Deligans. I am also 'oldish' and found MBTI two years ago. And ditto to everything you said except for one small personality difference. I am an INTJ who leans very INFP now. My son is an INTP who leans a bit INTJish. Everything changed for me and everything finally made sense finally. Have you read of the Introverted Intuitive as described by Carl Jung? As for meeting people, you can google Meetups for personality types in the Jungian community and or MBTI and or Socionics. Most of us who watch Erik Thor will also watch several of the same channels. Check out Talking with Famous People HostEric who runs a livestream several times a day. His channel is great for talking chatting and introducing yourself to our community. Eric is an ENTP of the creative kind and he is kind and smart. I see many of Erik Thor's viewers on his channel engaging in conversation. I also like Geek Psychology (Sherman) who is a very kind and very smart young INFP. I wish you well. I understand.
Meghan LeVota is an INFJ who runs Meetups. Check out her channel also. Her channel runs very female friendly and so does Li Jo 's channel. She is an INTJ.
I’ve never heard anyone articulate my life story without even knowing me. Just want to thank you because many of us need this. This has been the most validating video I’ve ever watched. Thank you sir!
I have gone through a stage recently where I am fed up of not being my true self and who I am I always dumb myself down to make people feel good about themselves and really testing the waters of being more open regarding who I am, and it's uncomfortable but I'm pushing and pushing
Recently made a new friend, after numerous times of meeting her she says to me, “when we first met I didn’t want to meet you again.” When I asked her why? She said, “you didn’t talk much and anything I told you didn’t share insight.” I was feeling her out, but now we are in the butterfly phase and becoming close friends, sharing deep secrets with each other. I lose a lot of potential friends because people don’t want to patient or wait for me to feel comfortable with them. Ya know? I wish I was able to be more open upon meeting new people, but as you’ve said... I really don’t want to be unauthentic. If I say something I want to mean it, not half heartedly speak.
I was in butterfly mode for so long through high school and years after it but then I realised the life I was living no longer resonated with me. I made a new Facebook account and basically deleted 95% of people out of my life. I've been cocooning now for the last 5 years, such a very long time. I went from having so many friends to now just my husband and I. I'm now studying real estate and I'm hoping this is my next butterfly stage coming but like you say, hopefully the phases won't be so dramatic now. I was so exhausted from years of butterflying that I really crashed and burned and would just love to have a life again, back to my vibrant, happy self ❤.
I am a 70 year old INFP and I find your insights to be most perceptive. Basically, this self-transformation process has been my life’s journey. I recognize it and feel its truth. It is wonderful to have names for these stages. Thank you for sharing your wisdom!
Wow! I'm an INFP and have always had issues with having this very strong urge to isolate regularly and feeling guilty because it would upset my friends and family members. (I've actually lost a lot of friends this way) It's nice to understand better what it is and why I need it. Thank you sir!😊
It hurts when they can't be understanding, and I don't know why they take offense. I am completely understanding when they need time. I think this is selfish of them. It's like they want to take our energy.
I am that person. Almost a decade ago, I had to leave my social media because it was too overwhelming for me. Managing a fansite online, and being updated with everything that I need to be updated about. It just became too much for me, and I needed to live for myself and recharge and be still. That self-transformation process fits perfectly with what I've experienced in my life. Although as I get older, I feel like the span of my interests and hobbies have lasted longer overtime, which is a good thing. INFPs are evolving as they age. Thank you, Erik as always for these valuable insights about us!
I noticed this pattern in myself at the age of 21, and at 26 I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder (and ADHD). I'm 29 and currently trying to get out of this phase. I hate it! It is actually upsetting to me to think that I will continue to get like this when I want so desperately to find my place and provide my children and husband with consistently.😔
Hugs. I have complex PTSD I know it is also for life. We are more powerful than our limits. And we give all we have when we can so we are doing enough. I literally mostly stuck in hiding. But we keep trying and moving forward and doing all we can. We are doing enough. It is our hearts that matter most. We do not need to be perfect. And we are perfectionist.
Ugh! I relate 927,482,929,283,737% (tho I call these cocooning phases my ‘hermit mode’). I’m so glad to have amazing close friends & family that understand my NEED to embark on these reoccurring journeys within...I no longer have to explain or apologise for these ghost sessions. Even better, I work for company that values my contribution so much, they allow me space & time to be recluse, knowing that when I resurface, it’ll be with 200x more spirit, energy and creativity. My boss is an INTJ, a super mature/healthy one. He has a VERY different, highly efficient, goal-oriented way of thinking/working/relating, so it’s quite funny that we work well together. But I can see now that it’s only since I’ve really begun to take ownership of my personality and put in the effort to be a mature/healthy INFP, that it’s affected (positively) my work and the dynamics between co-workers and superiors. There’s still so much to work on, but I’ve never felt so comfortable in my own INFP skin. Thanks heaps Erik! Always learning so much from your vids ☺️
What you said around 3:40 made me swell with overwhelming relief and warm joy 💗 what a beautiful gift. So grateful for you! (p.s. As a child I would answer the question, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” with “A hermit.” 😅 I have a vivid memory of looking down through the branches of my apple tree at my BFF Jenni whining, “But I don’t WANT to play Hermits!” So I begrudgingly climbed down and played Horses with her instead. 😂🙌💗)
Thank you Erik Thor. I’m a seventy-two year old INFP. I wen through a very productive stage in my life during which I went to college, graduated Suma cum Laud (I cant even spell it right, and I’m too tired/ weary at the moment to bother looking it up. Anyway, I did pretty well after graduating, but for the past several years I’ve been so tired, have no motivation (not usual for me) and have been wondering when, or even if, I’ll ever get past it. I’m reclusive; I go out to grocery shop etc. but that’s about it. I don’t have any friends. I’ve been feeling guilty for the way I am and keep trying to think of ways to change me but haven’t come up with anything! There are several other reasons as to why I’m so worn out, but it would take too much time, and make this comment much too long. I’m telling you all of this because I’m so relieved to know what’s wrong...I’m cocooning. But I’m tired of it. I’m in therapy because I have Complex PTSD from childhood sexual abuse. Hopefully/prayerfully that process will help bring me out, or help me to come out. I used to be a butterfly, and even thought of myself as a butterfly. Again, thank you. I’m going to subscribe to your channel. I hope this isn’t too long. Upon re-reading the stages I realize I’m in the death stage. (Actually, when I took the MBTI Years ago at my counselor’s suggestion, I came out as being on the border between INFP and ENFP. I’ve read the descriptions of both since then and came to understand why that is.)
It sounds like you're just about ready to break out of your coocon then! Maybe consider going to an MBTI meetup or HSP meetup or find some spaces where you can reconnect with people like you? Best of luck ❤️️
I second Erik there. I found when I had support family group that was validation to me and my struggles with past traumas one of which also childhood sexual abuse and I felt safe with I started spending more time there and feeling safe to share deep things with and it helped me grow again. But then they had to give me up because I was at the max time in that support so now I've been alone again n only got self to lean on again. I am beginning to see now thanks to Lord helping me now and Erik a blessing that gets it so well n helps me see why I have been negative toward other people. We need to find people like us. As these videos have helped there immensely I understand me again. To be fully oruslevs n share with others n connect again safely without harm. Where we feel safe n trust n be ourselves fully hard to do with cptsd.
I get goosebumps every time you talk about any personality type, but mainly INFPs (coming from an infp if it wasn’t clear hahaha). It’s hard to put in words how absolutely relaxing and validating it is to hear these things. Thank you for all that you do and I hope you know how much your videos mean to people, I love watching you in my free time and also when I’m feeling overwhelmed and anxious out of my mind. Thank you again, you really do lift my mood and I know many other viewers feel the same.
I've been going through this process right now. I just had a long term relationship end, and have needed to retreat and reorient myself in this new context. It's so hard to explain to people who aren't INFPs why I need to have time and space to think. I have a hard time with well wishers who try to be there for me by continually trying to get involved to "make sure you're ok." I know they are trying to be supportive, and I really do appreciate it. I know conventional wisdom says if a person is isolating themselves they need to be dragged out to be around other people, but that's the last thing I *need* when I'm in this process. I know myself well enough that I know what I need to grow, and I try to explain... But it's draining right when I need to focus that energy elsewhere. Thank you for your insight, and I will be forwarding this link to some loved ones so maybe they can begin to understand why I need space every now and then.
28 y/o infp here who is just discovering the power of cocooning and learning not to feel ashamed about it, and allowing myself to feel pain, discomfort of the death/rebirth phase. it feels so good to have all of these messy feelings and processes externalized and articulated in your videos - thank you erik!
I am a 25 years old INFP, and I was never aware of the Myers-Briggs personality types until recently and I think it is going to change my life.I dropped out of postgraduate medical school and start to be an artist and translator, my dream is to do something great and travel around the world to meet my satisfy. I think i am going to buttfly.
You described my current life situation perfectly. This is my third time cocooning (contemplating what I want to do with my life and career, hence my recent interest in MBTI) and I thought there was something wrong with me. It's so frustrating cocooning and feeling unproductive/worthless. At least there is merit to the process though and it's better in my opinion than continuing to live a meaningless and unfulfilled life for fear of taking the time to understand yourself better and change your life direction
You literally just described me and my life word for word. But the spin to my story is I married my 10 year best friend after 2 years of dating (10 mo ago) ISTP who had such traumatic experiences of neglect as a child that even he was not fully aware until we got married and marriage was the trigger. Lucky Intuitive ClairCognizant Empath INFP me, I found his shadow side before I even knew there was such a thing - It’s all about feeling to me regardless of the word. So what about a chronically traumatized INFP on the tail end of the trauma who is finally allowing the pain of what just transpired to be felt. So I spend most of my time alone by choice and for healing not for what I was doing when I thought my husbands as a psychopath (he has Alexithymia caused from CPTSD after 16 years a a child of Childhood Emotional neglect). My company is destroyed My adult son thinks I’m crazy (ENFJ in denial) He’s right - I HAVE CHANGED trauma of marrying your best friend who suddenly talks and acts like a 9 year old child month into married (later) who can’t describe his feelings and filters out negative emotions as if you said nothing after knowing him to be different for ten years as my friend ? Yea, I’ve Changed. My bitterness suddenly dissipated a few weeks ago into thin air overnight. It was after being held against my will in a psychiatric “hospital” when my husband (Actually it was an altar child to made the call) to the police saying he was concerned about me (even though I explained to him before I went to sleep that I was exaggerative and dramatic because I could never get him to react with feeling) That was pure hell and confusing and more traumatizing to me than some of my past experiences in life. Yet three days after coming home I had a download (ClairCognizant) I wrote it down as quickly as they could all of the synchronicity’s and just like that my anger and resentment lifted and was replaced with compassion for his journey. We are both working very hard but I can’t turn off my intuition and I often can feel the energy of his internal confusion caused from having Alexithymia And his mind being split. I never know who he is from one day to the next. Sigh.....
So spooky I knew I had the hermit phases but it definitely feels different to hear someone acknowledge that I have had this my whole life. Roller coasters for sure these past 27 yrs and I’m in the midst of breaking out of a cocoon/hermit phase. And quite frankly… I’m craving some variety already!
Thanks for the video and explaining why I (we as INFPs) do the cocoon thing. I agree that I honestly do it to recharge as well and it may occur with varying degrees with a bounce back effect at some point. I also relate to the blanket thing (preferably electric blanket lol). Another thing I have noticed is that the cocoon mode seems to occur as a result of life changing or painful events, sensory overload or fatigue, intrigue for exploring the inner world, or all of the above. I also agree that it seems to have self protective purpose to it in order to avoid conflict or overwhelm. I have also learned (thanks to typology awareness), that I am able to process things and focus much better alone or away from a lot of external stimuli. It frequently consists of seeking the why's, how's, and solutions to certain conditions/situations in order to gain more clarity, insight, and to create harmony for myself and in turn others as well. Anyway, just wanted to share my insights and compare notes with people who actually know about and experience these stages of behaviors. Thanks for the encouragement and tips as well!
Memories come rushing back of times I've blown up, broken down crying, or couldn't get out of bed for feeling hollow inside. I've spent so much of my life not knowing who I am, not wanting or needing friends. Why does everyone else make living look so easy? I love this video so much, I cried nearly the whole time. Thank you Erik for all of your time and caring to work tirelessly on this site. You are very much appreciated. Best, INFP, 37
I think this is such a candid and important video for INFP's...well done Erik Thor! My son is 24 yrs old (his name is Erik too), is an INFP and I've always felt helpless (I'm INFJ) in helping him get through these tough cycles. I've sent him this video and really think this will help him a lot while he discovers more about himself. The best thing both of us ever did was learning about our personality types... understanding each other better has made such a huge difference. I don't just learn about my personality but his as well and the understanding has been wonderful compared to our struggles in the past.
Okay it's crazy how much insight you have on the INFP, it felt like you were describing my life story at times in this video i was pretty blown away lol. Thanks man this video will be helpful in answering questions, hope you get more subs since your content is amazing.
Thank you for this! I’ve never felt so understood. You put into words, feelings that I didn’t know how to. I’ve always known I needed alone time to recharge and I feel so happy and bright afterwards. Also, the larvae phase...wow! I just thought I was indecisive about things because I will think I like to do a hobby and then get bored with it really quickly and move on to something else and try it. I love your description better. Didn’t see it as this cycle you describe and it makes sooo much sense!
"Funny" story: I was diagnosed with bipolar 2. Realized eventually, as I learned more about it, that it coulden't be correct and was lucky enough to get a second round of evaluations over the course of about 1 year. I FINALLY met a psychologist who truly saw me. I managed to open up to her, and she told me that there's no way I'm bipolar and the diagnosis was removed. What she saw and said to me during our time together, led me to look into personality types, and when I dove in and got the INFP result, things totally clicked and my life history started making sense. The psychologist was amazingly spot on with so many things! Now that I'm aware, I have more energy because I no longer push myself to be someone I never was, and I'm starting to feel proud about the inner world I've been trying so hard to hide and cut off. It's hard though, since I'm 48 years old and now have to reconnect with the little girl, the teenager, the young adult, the mother and woman I truly am. Hard, but also at times so liberating I feel like I'm flying. What you're describing in this video is spot on and I'm finally able to be more compassionate toward myself as I'm starting to understand, evolve and unfold as an INFP. Thank you for the work you do.
I've been listening to you for over a year and this is the second time I've watched this video. You have an excellent understanding of MBTI, especially in this video of the INFP (speaking as one who has gone through this cocooning process more than once). I honestly don't know why you don't have more views and subscribers. Maybe it's just a matter of time? Regardless, I'm sure many others also highly value your analyses. Thanks for all your content :)
I had a good friend that was hurt b/c I disconnected for many months after a loved one died. I'm also a single mother of 2, I work and go to school. I was overwhelmed. She was also going through a lot at the time. Now there's a rip in our friendship. I don't know if I should make the effort to fix it.
This was the best video on INFPs that I ever saw. Thank you 🙏 So inspiring, it helps me to make deeper sense in my needs and purpose within the cycles. Its though to deal with and also to be understood sometimes, so sometimes I just try to be more practical, but my inner nature stays the same. If I don’t have the room to retreat when I need, i feels very stressed. One of my favorite things is to feel and create new exspierences together with closed ones/other humans. When we lived something unique together that and shared special and intimate moments. I really cherish this. Reminds me too of the movie ,,lost in translation“ - through true intimacy you feel within connection it feels easier to feel Safe with being really authentic, because you feel that this is the deeper layer that really only allows connection, it’s the softness. Its hard sometimes to go there and right now I am a bit struggleling and shying away often, being there but having up my guard up often. Best is when i know i can deeply trust someone and that someone somehow magically gets me and that we really do something together, like living together/travel - just having a practical, but magical, because unordinary and not forever frame. This is best ❤️ i can really let loose mostly, open up and live fearlessly, feeling held by life. But the commitment is harder that’s true. And I am overwelmed to combine the organization of my life (money..) and to live to the way I would like it to feel. Right now i am stuck either in one or the other scenario and don’t really now how to sustain and where to end up. For one year I tried to think about the money aspect more and to be practical. I can’t really figure it out and also don’t live my life because of limited resources. Its not easy to find a good solution and figure it out. What i came to termes with is that your job really has to make sense for you individually, bring you joy and purpose, but that within that I need to be flexible and open for compromise and to go with the flow but not with go hard or go home but with softness and vunrability - with lasting authenticity through all the cycles. It was very good to see your video!
You are an absolute treasure, Erik! Thank you for sharing your passion so beautifully. You’ve inspired this INFP to give in to the call of the cocoon. I’ve denied myself all year the right to isolate, afraid to disappoint people. But it’s a form of self care that I am needing desperately, and your encouragement is the permission I needed to gift that to myself. Thank you!
Thank you so much for this very clarifying explanation of our stages!! I am in a cocooning stage again, after having been in one for 2 years, then out of it for a year. I know it won't last as long this go round. Your explanation helps me to understand these aren't periods of depression, as i have feared, but simply regrouping and essential to recreating myself after putting myself "out there". I cannot thank you enough!!!
Yes!!!!! I’ve been going through a period of cocooning actually! I lived a lot of life in the last year and we finally moved, I went through a break up and now it’s slowed down. I definitely recognized that I need time to process everything that I’ve lived in the last year and see what was really me and see what I liked and disliked. I kind of went into a hard lockdown though and almost ruined my relationship with my sister (ISFJ) but then we resolved things. But I have literally referred to this part of my life as being in a cocoon. I can’t wait to emerge as a butterfly and to be back in flow again!! But right now, I need to take things slow and do things on my own for a long period of time. But as for how that affects those around me, my sister hated when I stopped doing things with her and took it personally. To be fair, I was shutting her out because she had hurt me in many many ways by interfering in my relationship so much and I’m still kinda mad about it not gonna lie. But I really do need space away from her because she constantly is on the move from one thing to another and I lived her life for a year and I burnt myself out so hard that I had the worst depression I’ve ever had. I need to take things at my own pace. I want to figure out what I like. I need a real job. But for now, cocoon time!
Your channel helps alot, you have so much insight, it helps. It seems whenever i feel lost and watch your infp videos, it helps, even if it is just calming
Thank you so much! This really helped me, as well as your other videos. I mean these are confirmations to me. I realized these things in me before knowing I am an INFP. I did the personality test only a few days ago. I also add, that your words are very encouraging. Thank you again. 🙂
My friends called my hermit mode a hibernation because after that, I become extra emotional and sensitive for a week until it’s back to normal. It a constant battle of knowing what I should have done vs why I don’t do it. I’m well aware that my behavior can make people question my sincerity. Then, I feel apologetic towards people around me. I literally just went on an emotional rampage to my friends about how sorry I am toward them and how don’t want to disconnecting with them when I move away next year because they are such a good nature, couple days ago 😂
Absolutely 100% possible and very highly likely. Welcome to my world too! I believe it is part of the INFP persona. I wonder if the natural inability to convey what we really mean leads us to stop ✋ trying to convey with verbals and instead use other mediums that speak TO us more anyway...like art writing music etc. I hate being socially awkward. Sigh. Part of that is being surrounded by the WRONG people lol. I have learned that I am not nearly as socially awkward around other intuitive feelers. Because these are our people and our tribe. Being around sensors and thinkers can be irritating and demotivating. They just don't get it sometimes and then dismiss quickly what I can bring to the table. Which is inwardly hilarious because INFPs can provide what they are seeking!! If only they could stop talking long enough to get out of their own way! Thank you for the question. I understand now I need to seek out more INFP friendships or at least intuitive feeler friendships to feel more ME and move out of this cocooning stage I am in that Erik totally nailed! 💙 A state of becoming indeed!
Cise Tonietto I find that to be true. I can know in my mind exactly what I want to say and how I want to say it, but as soon as I start to express those thoughts and/or feelings, they fall apart , and I end up making no sense whatsoever to who/whom (?!?) ever I’m trying to convey those things to. I end up so frustrated, flustered, and feeling so foolish...
@@louiseavannorden4710 I'm actually going through this now with my management training. I have what I want to say in my mind, but can't articulate it, so I've just shutdown
so I'm researching mbti personalities since 3 years, and I guess I'm an INFP. damn, I really wish I was an easier type. But I already went all the way through the "death" and "rebirth" cupple times.
Thank you for this video, its so accurate and such a complete way to think about this process. It really helps to feel less crazy and trust the process. ❤️
Dude.. that transformation process.. very interesting.. I don't feel like i don't know myself. I am myself. But what do i want in this life? We all only got 1 chance for all i know 😅
Erik, thank you for this video. Great insight as always. It is fascinating and calming for me the ENFP. Owe to you I am going to give my "INFP crush" a chance that he would not get otherwise being detached currently.
Thanks for the vid. I though I was seeking for death, maybe I just need a cacoon to hide in. For a while anyways.. Hate december, and hate having people around all the time, nowhere to hide my head in..
Oh Erik, this has been a very insightful video and we all appreciate how much devotion and meaning you've put into this and it shows.. I, like many people here, have also needed to hear some of the things you've said here and what you've poetically described has really resonated with me and I feel safer and more understood in the world... In my head maybe hehe.. I have found for me getting help by the means of CBT: in particular thought record worksheets where you write down what your intense worry is at the time (and how you feel about it etc) and it helps you to draw other perspectives in from your own mind and also remembering things you've actually done as evidence for or against your thought.. to eventually give you a more balanced view and I often feel more energised for it if I sit and spend the time on it.. that probably doesn't make any sense, but it helps me in desperate times... thank you for being a source in inspiration for us all :)
Ah, and btw is there a video that talks about all the different cognitive functions and what has to be done to "satisfy" this function? Like when you have introverted feeling you need alone time and introspection, when you have extroverted thinking you to build structure and be effective? (this was of course heavily simplified :P)
Do other types not go through cycles like this? As an infp I totally relate to this - but are we the only ones that do it? How do we prevent this from destroying our partnerships? Looking back I see that my stages might have been blamed on my partner.
TY TY Happy New Year 2021😘🎉 I'm an INFP-A. I absolutely love your website. Yes, I absolutely love my home aka CAVE. It is my refuge where I get into my zone & play & create. I didn't understand where the play portion came from;yet, it is an integral part of my INFP personality. I must play everyday. It made more sense after taking your quiz. #Self Worth #Self Care #Self Love #Infinite Possibilities #Angel 👼 Number# 432; 543
Oh Erik, I love so so so much how appreciatively you talk about us INFPs. It always warms my heart
INFPs do not have Ne in the way ENFPs or ENTPs do so I consider it misleading to say you do, thats why instead I say you are Np types. I see more Ni in INFPs in flow and Ne is more something inspirational to an INFP :)
Mine too 💓
Hay Erik, Eric here, fellow INFP. I've gone through alot of situations where I felt trapped or mistreated but growing up iv always cared about people. I could always see the light but it really made me blind to all the mud some people wair. And this was back in the mid to late 90s were people had a lot of different options than thay do now. Atlest the people I know. So when I stop just looking at just the light in people, it really took me a long time to except the fact that someone people are just out to hurt you in some way.... I spent a really long time barely talking to anyone. But it hit the hardest when I noticed it in my friends and family. They were eather inpatient with me or trying to get me to "cheer up" in all the wrong ways. Then one day, depressed unable to even want to feel happy. There was somone at school, who I barely noticed which if you know us, you know not much slips our gaze. So for this girl to go almost completely unnoticed at school was unheard of. But she was crying in the corner. Of course my first reaction was to go see what was up. I bent down, and to her left I noticed her notebook coverd in some drink. I don't remember which drink. It was opened to one her drawings she made of herself in almost a ☯️ Mashup of her and well a more unpleasant side of her. I could see that light drawn right in front of my eyes but it was so beautifully combined with some of her darkest side, and like a flash of inspiration hit. I wanted to know everything about this woman and about how that art made her feel I could already tell she put so much passion into it, just by how sad she was to see it ruined. But the want to know why people see themselves or others as dark and light, good and evil, ☯️. Why is the real reason why people want to hurt other, and the same in reverse. What drives me to want to help those people who hurt others. For the longest time I was still so blind. And I'm constantly working on myself and my relationships since that day. I only learned I was an INFP this year. Witch just go's to show you there's still so much to learn.
Wow after watching this video I feel like you’re the only one who understands me lol. I don’t think I even understood until now. I’ve been cocooning for 3 years and I’m still trying new things and putting myself out there. It’s been exhausting, but I keep on trying. I’m 44 and I still feel like I haven’t lived my purpose. I feel misunderstood by friends and family and they really don’t understand what’s going on with me. I’m still a caterpillar at this stage, but everyday I’m taking steps toward what I like and what brings me joy. I thought I was just being weird cuz I stopped caring about what others think, I stopped being present on social media, and I also stopped socializing with certain people that I used to be really close to. Thanks for the video! I feel like I should watch it once a week just to validate my existence and not get too down about the process.
As an INFP, I’m always in a state of flux between seeing the world as either stunningly beautiful or existentially horrifying... I hope one day to be able to find the Balance between those two realities so that I can move through life with grace and intrinsic energy rather than feeling so overwhelmed and anxious all the time
I'm an INFP and I prefer being alone when noone understand me ..but with whom I feel comfortable I spend hours and hours .
It depends .
I am a 45 year old INFP. I have always had long periods of time where I “cocoon” and go into isolation. I chose to not keep close friends because the stimulus of interaction is to much for me most days. I require lots of alone time, with as limited stimuli as possible. Very dim lit room, small fan running, blanket and no other noise. If I bypass my DAILY cocoon (I call it cave) time then I become angry and frustrated towards everything and everyone. I do best in nature and in my own thoughts. The sun light adversely effects me so I block it all out of my home. I’ve always thought of myself as the single “witch” that lives on the hill in some lord of the rings realm. ♥️
NorCal OntheRight that sounds like heaven!! Wish I was retired and lived there too
Sounds like you might be HSP also
Might you also be an HSP?
Um...this is me to a "T"...except the witch part. I would be the fairy...but we are similar and it's comforting to know someone else in this world understands.
Damn a hot INFP
I'm a 71 yr old INFP and am currently cocooning. I have just left an 18 year relationship and have moved to a different city. I was never aware of the Myers-Briggs personality types until recently and I think it is going to change my life. I have never felt confident or sure of anything and nothing lasts for me. The constantly changing them absolutely fits my life. And now I am just exhausted but really happy to find your videos and others about the INFP type. I always thought I was just uniquely and completely flawed - and now I see my life story portrayed not as a flaw but as a personality type, This is very freeing and I am cocooning to make sense of it all. I have experienced this cycle you describe I would say about every 10 years. I'm pretty happy now in spite of being sort of in limbo - in between most everything, I don't think I have ever known another INFP. For sure my family and partners have been opposites. I would like to try an INFP or at least similar for a partnership - not sure how to find them. A hilarious note - on a dating website that supposedly pairs you up with good matches - I consistently get no matches. Ha! No kidding. I would rather be alone though than with people that don't understand me.
Hello, Jan of the Deligans. I am also 'oldish' and found MBTI two years ago.
And ditto to everything you said except for one small personality difference.
I am an INTJ who leans very INFP now. My son is an INTP who leans a bit INTJish.
Everything changed for me and everything finally made sense finally.
Have you read of the Introverted Intuitive as described by Carl Jung?
As for meeting people, you can google Meetups for personality types in the Jungian community and or MBTI and or Socionics.
Most of us who watch Erik Thor will also watch several of the same channels.
Check out Talking with Famous People HostEric who runs a livestream several times a day.
His channel is great for talking chatting and introducing yourself to our community. Eric is an ENTP of the creative kind and he is kind and smart. I see many of Erik Thor's viewers on his channel engaging in conversation.
I also like Geek Psychology (Sherman) who is a very kind and very smart young INFP.
I wish you well. I understand.
Meghan LeVota is an INFJ who runs Meetups. Check out her channel also. Her channel runs very female friendly and so does Li Jo 's channel. She is an INTJ.
@@wynstansmom829 Thanks that's very helpful
@@jandeligans2834 You are welcome. I wish you a happy new year.
I really appreciate the emphasis on INFP. Unlike other channels, with click bait, generalities, and vague videos, your channel is refreshing.
thanks a lot for that! :)
My wife likes to call the cocoon phase "hermit mode". Thanks for the insights✌
smjbr79 that’s cute! I call it “cave time”.
Relates to being called these by someone as well lol!
That's funny, I also call it hermit mode
I also call it hermit mode and say I'm in my cave
I also call it "hermit mode" or "monk mode."
I’ve never heard anyone articulate my life story without even knowing me. Just want to thank you because many of us need this. This has been the most validating video I’ve ever watched. Thank you sir!
Agreed.
I have gone through a stage recently where I am fed up of not being my true self and who I am I always dumb myself down to make people feel good about themselves and really testing the waters of being more open regarding who I am, and it's uncomfortable but I'm pushing and pushing
Recently made a new friend, after numerous times of meeting her she says to me, “when we first met I didn’t want to meet you again.” When I asked her why? She said, “you didn’t talk much and anything I told you didn’t share insight.” I was feeling her out, but now we are in the butterfly phase and becoming close friends, sharing deep secrets with each other.
I lose a lot of potential friends because people don’t want to patient or wait for me to feel comfortable with them. Ya know? I wish I was able to be more open upon meeting new people, but as you’ve said... I really don’t want to be unauthentic. If I say something I want to mean it, not half heartedly speak.
As an INFP in hermit mode, I needed this video. Thank you, Erik!
Absolutely the best infp insight I have ever heard. I am infp.
I was in butterfly mode for so long through high school and years after it but then I realised the life I was living no longer resonated with me. I made a new Facebook account and basically deleted 95% of people out of my life. I've been cocooning now for the last 5 years, such a very long time. I went from having so many friends to now just my husband and I. I'm now studying real estate and I'm hoping this is my next butterfly stage coming but like you say, hopefully the phases won't be so dramatic now. I was so exhausted from years of butterflying that I really crashed and burned and would just love to have a life again, back to my vibrant, happy self ❤.
I am a 70 year old INFP and I find your insights to be most perceptive. Basically, this self-transformation process has been my life’s journey. I recognize it and feel its truth. It is wonderful to have names for these stages. Thank you for sharing your wisdom!
How often did u tolerate seeing your spouse
Wow! I'm an INFP and have always had issues with having this very strong urge to isolate regularly and feeling guilty because it would upset my friends and family members. (I've actually lost a lot of friends this way)
It's nice to understand better what it is and why I need it.
Thank you sir!😊
It hurts when they can't be understanding, and I don't know why they take offense. I am completely understanding when they need time. I think this is selfish of them. It's like they want to take our energy.
I fucking love the cocoon, thank you for the validation 💖💖💖
I am that person. Almost a decade ago, I had to leave my social media because it was too overwhelming for me. Managing a fansite online, and being updated with everything that I need to be updated about. It just became too much for me, and I needed to live for myself and recharge and be still. That self-transformation process fits perfectly with what I've experienced in my life. Although as I get older, I feel like the span of my interests and hobbies have lasted longer overtime, which is a good thing. INFPs are evolving as they age. Thank you, Erik as always for these valuable insights about us!
When I’m having a bad day your videos lift my spirits and make me feel seen. Thank you! From an INFP.
Infp here! Never heard anyone describe myself so precisely. Thank you Erik :D
I noticed this pattern in myself at the age of 21, and at 26 I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder (and ADHD). I'm 29 and currently trying to get out of this phase. I hate it! It is actually upsetting to me to think that I will continue to get like this when I want so desperately to find my place and provide my children and husband with consistently.😔
Hugs.
I have complex PTSD I know it is also for life. We are more powerful than our limits. And we give all we have when we can so we are doing enough.
I literally mostly stuck in hiding. But we keep trying and moving forward and doing all we can. We are doing enough. It is our hearts that matter most. We do not need to be perfect. And we are perfectionist.
Good lord, you know and understand me better than anyone I've ever met!
thank you, as an INFP myself I really needed to hear this right now
Ugh! I relate 927,482,929,283,737% (tho I call these cocooning phases my ‘hermit mode’).
I’m so glad to have amazing close friends & family that understand my NEED to embark on these reoccurring journeys within...I no longer have to explain or apologise for these ghost sessions.
Even better, I work for company that values my contribution so much, they allow me space & time to be recluse, knowing that when I resurface, it’ll be with 200x more spirit, energy and creativity.
My boss is an INTJ, a super mature/healthy one. He has a VERY different, highly efficient, goal-oriented way of thinking/working/relating, so it’s quite funny that we work well together.
But I can see now that it’s only since I’ve really begun to take ownership of my personality and put in the effort to be a mature/healthy INFP, that it’s affected (positively) my work and the dynamics between co-workers and superiors.
There’s still so much to work on, but I’ve never felt so comfortable in my own INFP skin.
Thanks heaps Erik!
Always learning so much from your vids ☺️
I'm not gonna let the limits and expectations of the world hold me back!
What you said around 3:40 made me swell with overwhelming relief and warm joy 💗 what a beautiful gift. So grateful for you! (p.s. As a child I would answer the question, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” with “A hermit.” 😅 I have a vivid memory of looking down through the branches of my apple tree at my BFF Jenni whining, “But I don’t WANT to play Hermits!” So I begrudgingly climbed down and played Horses with her instead. 😂🙌💗)
Thank you Erik Thor. I’m a seventy-two year old INFP. I wen through a very productive stage in my life during which I went to college, graduated Suma cum Laud (I cant even spell it right, and I’m too tired/ weary at the moment to bother looking it up. Anyway, I did pretty well after graduating, but for the past several years I’ve been so tired, have no motivation (not usual for me) and have been wondering when, or even if, I’ll ever get past it. I’m reclusive; I go out to grocery shop etc. but that’s about it. I don’t have any friends. I’ve been feeling guilty for the way I am and keep trying to think of ways to change me but haven’t come up with anything! There are several other reasons as to why I’m so worn out, but it would take too much time, and make this comment much too long. I’m telling you all of this because I’m so relieved to know what’s wrong...I’m cocooning. But I’m tired of it. I’m in therapy because I have Complex PTSD from childhood sexual abuse. Hopefully/prayerfully that process will help bring me out, or help me to come out. I used to be a butterfly, and even thought of myself as a butterfly. Again, thank you. I’m going to subscribe to your channel. I hope this isn’t too long. Upon re-reading the stages I realize I’m in the death stage. (Actually, when I took the MBTI Years ago at my counselor’s suggestion, I came out as being on the border between INFP and ENFP. I’ve read the descriptions of both since then and came to understand why that is.)
It sounds like you're just about ready to break out of your coocon then! Maybe consider going to an MBTI meetup or HSP meetup or find some spaces where you can reconnect with people like you? Best of luck ❤️️
You are exactly like me. I have complex PTSD too. You are not alone.
I second Erik there. I found when I had support family group that was validation to me and my struggles with past traumas one of which also childhood sexual abuse and I felt safe with I started spending more time there and feeling safe to share deep things with and it helped me grow again.
But then they had to give me up because I was at the max time in that support so now I've been alone again n only got self to lean on again.
I am beginning to see now thanks to Lord helping me now and Erik a blessing that gets it so well n helps me see why I have been negative toward other people. We need to find people like us. As these videos have helped there immensely I understand me again. To be fully oruslevs n share with others n connect again safely without harm. Where we feel safe n trust n be ourselves fully hard to do with cptsd.
I get goosebumps every time you talk about any personality type, but mainly INFPs (coming from an infp if it wasn’t clear hahaha). It’s hard to put in words how absolutely relaxing and validating it is to hear these things. Thank you for all that you do and I hope you know how much your videos mean to people, I love watching you in my free time and also when I’m feeling overwhelmed and anxious out of my mind. Thank you again, you really do lift my mood and I know many other viewers feel the same.
"There is always more. There is always something left." Yes. Thank you.. Just like the TARDIS, we are bigger on the inside. Love to all.
I've been going through this process right now. I just had a long term relationship end, and have needed to retreat and reorient myself in this new context. It's so hard to explain to people who aren't INFPs why I need to have time and space to think.
I have a hard time with well wishers who try to be there for me by continually trying to get involved to "make sure you're ok." I know they are trying to be supportive, and I really do appreciate it. I know conventional wisdom says if a person is isolating themselves they need to be dragged out to be around other people, but that's the last thing I *need* when I'm in this process.
I know myself well enough that I know what I need to grow, and I try to explain... But it's draining right when I need to focus that energy elsewhere.
Thank you for your insight, and I will be forwarding this link to some loved ones so maybe they can begin to understand why I need space every now and then.
28 y/o infp here who is just discovering the power of cocooning and learning not to feel ashamed about it, and allowing myself to feel pain, discomfort of the death/rebirth phase. it feels so good to have all of these messy feelings and processes externalized and articulated in your videos - thank you erik!
I am a 25 years old INFP, and I was never aware of the Myers-Briggs personality types until recently and I think it is going to change my life.I dropped out of postgraduate medical school and start to be an artist and translator, my dream is to do something great and travel around the world to meet my satisfy. I think i am going to buttfly.
You described my current life situation perfectly. This is my third time cocooning (contemplating what I want to do with my life and career, hence my recent interest in MBTI) and I thought there was something wrong with me. It's so frustrating cocooning and feeling unproductive/worthless. At least there is merit to the process though and it's better in my opinion than continuing to live a meaningless and unfulfilled life for fear of taking the time to understand yourself better and change your life direction
This guy is awesome and insightful
So good! I thought I was crazy but listening to this it now makes sense
You literally just described me and my life word for word. But the spin to my story is I married my 10 year best friend after 2 years of dating (10 mo ago) ISTP who had such traumatic experiences of neglect as a child that even he was not fully aware until we got married and marriage was the trigger. Lucky Intuitive ClairCognizant Empath INFP me, I found his shadow side before I even knew there was such a thing - It’s all about feeling to me regardless of the word. So what about a chronically traumatized INFP on the tail end of the trauma who is finally allowing the pain of what just transpired to be felt. So I spend most of my time alone by choice and for healing not for what I was doing when I thought my husbands as a psychopath (he has Alexithymia caused from CPTSD after 16 years a a child of Childhood Emotional neglect).
My company is destroyed
My adult son thinks I’m crazy (ENFJ in denial)
He’s right - I HAVE CHANGED trauma of marrying your best friend who suddenly talks and acts like a 9 year old child month into married (later) who can’t describe his feelings and filters out negative emotions as if you said nothing after knowing him to be different for ten years as my friend ? Yea, I’ve Changed.
My bitterness suddenly dissipated a few weeks ago into thin air overnight. It was after being held against my will in a psychiatric “hospital” when my husband (Actually it was an altar child to made the call) to the police saying he was concerned about me (even though I explained to him before I went to sleep that I was exaggerative and dramatic because I could never get him to react with feeling)
That was pure hell and confusing and more traumatizing to me than some of my past experiences in life.
Yet three days after coming home I had a download (ClairCognizant)
I wrote it down as quickly as they could all of the synchronicity’s and just like that my anger and resentment lifted and was replaced with compassion for his journey.
We are both working very hard but I can’t turn off my intuition and I often can feel the energy of his internal confusion caused from having Alexithymia And his mind being split. I never know who he is from one day to the next.
Sigh.....
So spooky I knew I had the hermit phases but it definitely feels different to hear someone acknowledge that I have had this my whole life. Roller coasters for sure these past 27 yrs and I’m in the midst of breaking out of a cocoon/hermit phase. And quite frankly… I’m craving some variety already!
Thanks for the video and explaining why I (we as INFPs) do the cocoon thing. I agree that I honestly do it to recharge as well and it may occur with varying degrees with a bounce back effect at some point. I also relate to the blanket thing (preferably electric blanket lol). Another thing I have noticed is that the cocoon mode seems to occur as a result of life changing or painful events, sensory overload or fatigue, intrigue for exploring the inner world, or all of the above. I also agree that it seems to have self protective purpose to it in order to avoid conflict or overwhelm. I have also learned (thanks to typology awareness), that I am able to process things and focus much better alone or away from a lot of external stimuli. It frequently consists of seeking the why's, how's, and solutions to certain conditions/situations in order to gain more clarity, insight, and to create harmony for myself and in turn others as well. Anyway, just wanted to share my insights and compare notes with people who actually know about and experience these stages of behaviors. Thanks for the encouragement and tips as well!
Your speech sounds so precise, that's just adorable! )
Memories come rushing back of times I've blown up, broken down crying, or couldn't get out of bed for feeling hollow inside.
I've spent so much of my life not knowing who I am, not wanting or needing friends. Why does everyone else make living look so easy?
I love this video so much, I cried nearly the whole time.
Thank you Erik for all of your time and caring to work tirelessly on this site. You are very much appreciated.
Best,
INFP, 37
This was super helpful to me right now! I thought I was wrong to be isolating so much.
I think this is such a candid and important video for INFP's...well done Erik Thor! My son is 24 yrs old (his name is Erik too), is an INFP and I've always felt helpless (I'm INFJ) in helping him get through these tough cycles. I've sent him this video and really think this will help him a lot while he discovers more about himself. The best thing both of us ever did was learning about our personality types... understanding each other better has made such a huge difference. I don't just learn about my personality but his as well and the understanding has been wonderful compared to our struggles in the past.
Okay it's crazy how much insight you have on the INFP, it felt like you were describing my life story at times in this video i was pretty blown away lol. Thanks man this video will be
helpful in answering questions, hope you get more subs since your content is amazing.
Thank you for this! I’ve never felt so understood. You put into words, feelings that I didn’t know how to. I’ve always known I needed alone time to recharge and I feel so happy and bright afterwards. Also, the larvae phase...wow! I just thought I was indecisive about things because I will think I like to do a hobby and then get bored with it really quickly and move on to something else and try it. I love your description better. Didn’t see it as this cycle you describe and it makes sooo much sense!
"Funny" story: I was diagnosed with bipolar 2. Realized eventually, as I learned more about it, that it coulden't be correct and was lucky enough to get a second round of evaluations over the course of about 1 year. I FINALLY met a psychologist who truly saw me. I managed to open up to her, and she told me that there's no way I'm bipolar and the diagnosis was removed. What she saw and said to me during our time together, led me to look into personality types, and when I dove in and got the INFP result, things totally clicked and my life history started making sense. The psychologist was amazingly spot on with so many things! Now that I'm aware, I have more energy because I no longer push myself to be someone I never was, and I'm starting to feel proud about the inner world I've been trying so hard to hide and cut off. It's hard though, since I'm 48 years old and now have to reconnect with the little girl, the teenager, the young adult, the mother and woman I truly am. Hard, but also at times so liberating I feel like I'm flying. What you're describing in this video is spot on and I'm finally able to be more compassionate toward myself as I'm starting to understand, evolve and unfold as an INFP. Thank you for the work you do.
Thank you for this video! I'm an infp who has been struggling with burn out. This video I'm going to use as a guide to help with that! 💚💙💛
I get lost in people sometimes until I do self care and put my needs first, thank you for the video.
It is wonderful to know about recharging. I always fought the idea that I was lazy, even though I really wasnt
Dammit Erik! Stop looking into my soul!!
Exactly right!!
Very nice video. One of the best inspirational video in my life.
When it's Halloween and you wimped out of a horror movie and you need something soft and nice to calm down, you watch Erik Thor 😂
I've been listening to you for over a year and this is the second time I've watched this video. You have an excellent understanding of MBTI, especially in this video of the INFP (speaking as one who has gone through this cocooning process more than once). I honestly don't know why you don't have more views and subscribers. Maybe it's just a matter of time? Regardless, I'm sure many others also highly value your analyses. Thanks for all your content :)
WOW! Exactly true for me. I’m a 57 year old INFP and just beginning my rebirth stage. I. LOVE. IT! 🦋
I had a good friend that was hurt b/c I disconnected for many months after a loved one died. I'm also a single mother of 2, I work and go to school. I was overwhelmed. She was also going through a lot at the time. Now there's a rip in our friendship. I don't know if I should make the effort to fix it.
This was the best video on INFPs that I ever saw. Thank you 🙏 So inspiring, it helps me to make deeper sense in my needs and purpose within the cycles. Its though to deal with and also to be understood sometimes, so sometimes I just try to be more practical, but my inner nature stays the same. If I don’t have the room to retreat when I need, i feels very stressed. One of my favorite things is to feel and create new exspierences together with closed ones/other humans. When we lived something unique together that and shared special and intimate moments. I really cherish this. Reminds me too of the movie ,,lost in translation“ - through true intimacy you feel within connection it feels easier to feel Safe with being really authentic, because you feel that this is the deeper layer that really only allows connection, it’s the softness. Its hard sometimes to go there and right now I am a bit struggleling and shying away often, being there but having up my guard
up often. Best is when i know i can deeply trust someone and that someone somehow magically gets me and that we really do something together, like living together/travel - just having a practical, but magical, because unordinary and not forever frame. This is best ❤️ i can really let loose mostly, open up and live fearlessly, feeling held by life. But the commitment is harder that’s true. And I am overwelmed to combine the organization of my life (money..) and to live to the way I would like it to feel. Right now i am stuck either in one or the other scenario and don’t really now how to sustain and where to end up. For one year I tried to think about the money aspect more and to be practical. I can’t really figure it out and also don’t live my life because of limited resources. Its not easy to find a good solution and figure it out. What i came to termes with is that your job really has to make sense for you individually, bring you joy and purpose, but that within that I need to be flexible and open for compromise and to go with the flow but not with go hard or go home but with softness and vunrability - with lasting authenticity through all the cycles. It was very good to see your video!
You are an absolute treasure, Erik!
Thank you for sharing your passion so beautifully. You’ve inspired this INFP to give in to the call of the cocoon. I’ve denied myself all year the right to isolate, afraid to disappoint people. But it’s a form of self care that I am needing desperately, and your encouragement is the permission I needed to gift that to myself. Thank you!
Thank you so much for this very clarifying explanation of our stages!! I am in a cocooning stage again, after having been in one for 2 years, then out of it for a year. I know it won't last as long this go round. Your explanation helps me to understand these aren't periods of depression, as i have feared, but simply regrouping and essential to recreating myself after putting myself "out there". I cannot thank you enough!!!
this is really helpful, lots of insights that no-one else seems to have.
Thank you Erik ..for this beautiful presentation
I experianced all these emotions
I think right now iam in the cocoon stage
Yes!!!!! I’ve been going through a period of cocooning actually! I lived a lot of life in the last year and we finally moved, I went through a break up and now it’s slowed down. I definitely recognized that I need time to process everything that I’ve lived in the last year and see what was really me and see what I liked and disliked. I kind of went into a hard lockdown though and almost ruined my relationship with my sister (ISFJ) but then we resolved things. But I have literally referred to this part of my life as being in a cocoon. I can’t wait to emerge as a butterfly and to be back in flow again!! But right now, I need to take things slow and do things on my own for a long period of time. But as for how that affects those around me, my sister hated when I stopped doing things with her and took it personally. To be fair, I was shutting her out because she had hurt me in many many ways by interfering in my relationship so much and I’m still kinda mad about it not gonna lie. But I really do need space away from her because she constantly is on the move from one thing to another and I lived her life for a year and I burnt myself out so hard that I had the worst depression I’ve ever had. I need to take things at my own pace. I want to figure out what I like. I need a real job. But for now, cocoon time!
This is such validating information for INFPs. Thank you for making this video! ❤️
Thank you this helped with the pain 💛 and was quite moving
Your channel helps alot, you have so much insight, it helps. It seems whenever i feel lost and watch your infp videos, it helps, even if it is just calming
really well articulated - thanks
This is where I am right now! I'm still in the middle of it.
As an INFP, I immediately tried to read the author's name on the book next to you...
Lani Taylor's "Strange to Dreamer" He says it around 1:30.
Erik, I think you’re a genius! Thank you!
ruclips.net/video/1YhR5UfaAzM/видео.html.
A famous infp...
thanks so much for your videos Erik - I just love them
Thank you so much! This really helped me, as well as your other videos. I mean these are confirmations to me. I realized these things in me before knowing I am an INFP. I did the personality test only a few days ago. I also add, that your words are very encouraging. Thank you again. 🙂
LOVE this one, Erik!
My friends called my hermit mode a hibernation because after that, I become extra emotional and sensitive for a week until it’s back to normal. It a constant battle of knowing what I should have done vs why I don’t do it. I’m well aware that my behavior can make people question my sincerity. Then, I feel apologetic towards people around me. I literally just went on an emotional rampage to my friends about how sorry I am toward them and how don’t want to disconnecting with them when I move away next year because they are such a good nature, couple days ago 😂
I feel so good watching this video!
I understand myself so much!
Thanks! Greetings from Brazil 🇧🇷!!!
Erik, you have such amazing insights into the INFP. Thank you - a fellow INFP!
helloo, thank you so much for this!! it really helped put things into perspective for me i'm really so grateful /excuse the lack of vocabulary 😅/
So accurate, true and insightful🙏 Thank you for this.
I loved this!! Infp here
The Sound of Flowers
Roses are blue
Violets are red
Discovering what is true
Denying in one's head
RUclips is getting too personal now😅
Is it possible for an INFP to be socially awkward and not be able to convey what he/she means?
Absolutely 100% possible and very highly likely. Welcome to my world too! I believe it is part of the INFP persona. I wonder if the natural inability to convey what we really mean leads us to stop ✋ trying to convey with verbals and instead use other mediums that speak TO us more anyway...like art writing music etc. I hate being socially awkward. Sigh. Part of that is being surrounded by the WRONG people lol. I have learned that I am not nearly as socially awkward around other intuitive feelers. Because these are our people and our tribe. Being around sensors and thinkers can be irritating and demotivating. They just don't get it sometimes and then dismiss quickly what I can bring to the table. Which is inwardly hilarious because INFPs can provide what they are seeking!! If only they could stop talking long enough to get out of their own way! Thank you for the question. I understand now I need to seek out more INFP friendships or at least intuitive feeler friendships to feel more ME and move out of this cocooning stage I am in that Erik totally nailed! 💙 A state of becoming indeed!
Cise Tonietto I find that to be true. I can know in my mind exactly what I want to say and how I want to say it, but as soon as I start to express those thoughts and/or feelings, they fall apart , and I end up making no sense whatsoever to who/whom (?!?) ever I’m trying to convey those things to. I end up so frustrated, flustered, and feeling so foolish...
@@louiseavannorden4710 I'm actually going through this now with my management training. I have what I want to say in my mind, but can't articulate it, so I've just shutdown
so I'm researching mbti personalities since 3 years, and I guess I'm an INFP. damn, I really wish I was an easier type. But I already went all the way through the "death" and "rebirth" cupple times.
Luke Skywalker in the Last Jedi is a good example of this. :)
Thank you for this video, its so accurate and such a complete way to think about this process. It really helps to feel less crazy and trust the process. ❤️
YES. Trust yourself. :)
Dude.. that transformation process.. very interesting..
I don't feel like i don't know myself. I am myself. But what do i want in this life? We all only got 1 chance for all i know 😅
Erik, thank you for this video. Great insight as always. It is fascinating and calming for me the ENFP. Owe to you I am going to give my "INFP crush" a chance that he would not get otherwise being detached currently.
Fantastic explanation, Erik !!
Erik! How do you know this?? And how can we use this knowledge to build a better world? - INFP summit needed!
Aidan Mcfall I would be down for an INFP summit lol.
Thanks for the vid. I though I was seeking for death, maybe I just need a cacoon to hide in. For a while anyways.. Hate december, and hate having people around all the time, nowhere to hide my head in..
December is the best time to cozy up and relax, summer is the time for really enjoying life and blossoming fully.
You most be the infp guru or something. Its exactely what I going through! :O
Oh Erik, this has been a very insightful video and we all appreciate how much devotion and meaning you've put into this and it shows.. I, like many people here, have also needed to hear some of the things you've said here and what you've poetically described has really resonated with me and I feel safer and more understood in the world... In my head maybe hehe.. I have found for me getting help by the means of CBT: in particular thought record worksheets where you write down what your intense worry is at the time (and how you feel about it etc) and it helps you to draw other perspectives in from your own mind and also remembering things you've actually done as evidence for or against your thought.. to eventually give you a more balanced view and I often feel more energised for it if I sit and spend the time on it.. that probably doesn't make any sense, but it helps me in desperate times... thank you for being a source in inspiration for us all :)
I enjoyed listening to this... Thank you (infp)
Ah, and btw is there a video that talks about all the different cognitive functions and what has to be done to "satisfy" this function? Like when you have introverted feeling you need alone time and introspection, when you have extroverted thinking you to build structure and be effective? (this was of course heavily simplified :P)
Good idea!
@@ErikThor :))
I found this video very reassuring, many thanks 😊 can you give me the title again of that book ?
Strange the dreamer, Laini Taylor
Do other types not go through cycles like this? As an infp I totally relate to this - but are we the only ones that do it? How do we prevent this from destroying our partnerships? Looking back I see that my stages might have been blamed on my partner.
TY TY
Happy New Year 2021😘🎉
I'm an INFP-A.
I absolutely love your website.
Yes, I absolutely love my home aka CAVE. It is my refuge where I get into my zone & play & create.
I didn't understand where the play portion came from;yet, it is an integral part of my INFP personality. I must play everyday. It made more sense after taking your quiz.
#Self Worth
#Self Care
#Self Love
#Infinite Possibilities
#Angel 👼 Number# 432; 543
Hmmmm.....I'm infj and I do this.
oh damn, at 52 years of age; I have been in 'death' mode for like 10 years now. Eek!
Thank fuck it's January. Time to stop hibernating:D
Does this self transformation process happen over a lifetime or is it a cyclic process? Or could it be either?
WOW! Wonderful!