My former husband used to look at other women even very young ones in their mid teens. He wouldn't just look--he would ogle and drool at very young women at the beach. And he was a high school teacher! It was disgusting. And he wouldnever fail to point out women he found attractive to me, always women who looked nothing like me. Finally I asked a therapist what to do and she said, "Ask him: 'How does your constant looking at other women add to our relationship?" She was a genius.
Purity culture gave strength to the very thing it tried to stop. Churchianity needs to stop going on and on about sin and stare at Christ and preach Christ instead
I am not sure what I think about Sheila, but there this..."We are not going to talk about it as it cause men to sin." You can MOST definitely teach modesty with our blaming girls/women (or anyone) for someone else's sin!!! That being said, I think the problems she is bringing to light and doesn't even realize it, Youth Ministry might be the bigger issue than purity culture downfalls.
One of the RUclips channels enquiring about this subject has as their motto: "Purity Culture is Rape Culture". At first I was shocked but the more I learned the more I agreed. Both Boys and Girls were injured in different ways.
@@luckystoller6171 As I think about the subject, I see, maybe there is a difference between "Purity Culture" and "purity teaching". I am just "thinking out loud", if you will. SO take it as just a thought process, not a statement of my beliefs. I think there are more nuances, than any of the broad stroke statement you, me or Sheila are making. But I do agree, there are many injuries in the "Purity culture", than many realized. When the focus is on actions instead of heart, that might be the real problem. Christ even addressed that, "The good person out of the good treasure of his heart produces good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure produces evil, for out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks." (Luke 6:45 ESV) "Purity culture" focuses on purifying our actions, when we need to focus on purifying our hearts. I guess, my problem with Sheila, is she is focusing on the problem and NOT focusing on the re solution. She is trying to purify action not the heart. Again, this is just me thinking out loud. What are your thoughts?
@@Caderic I believe she provides solutions in her books. In pointing out the problems she is simply allowing those who have been wounded to identify with the issues. She is pointing toward a more loving, healthy relationship in marriage. I like her light touch with the subject without trivializing it. You?
@@luckystoller6171 As someone that was influenced, but only minorly, by purity culture, I think the problem is try to make our actions holy instead of making our hearts holy. Having read some of Sheila's book and listen to her on many different podcasts and the like, she just swings the pendulum of actions to the other side instead of addressing holiness of the heart. Some times that looks very similar but it is not the same. Really, I don't have a problem with youth ministry in and of itself. What I have a problem with is how it is generally done. It to is where making our actions holy is pushed as apposed to making our hearts holy. This is a long and drawn out subject, not fit for the comment sections, but there are MANY nuances and caveats that go with it.
Well said false narrative 😮. Thanks very much for talking about this .😅
My former husband used to look at other women even very young ones in their mid teens. He wouldn't just look--he would ogle and drool at very young women at the beach. And he was a high school teacher! It was disgusting. And he wouldnever fail to point out women he found attractive to me, always women who looked nothing like me. Finally I asked a therapist what to do and she said, "Ask him: 'How does your constant looking at other women add to our relationship?" She was a genius.
He was using them to keep me off balance and insecure.
Purity culture gave strength to the very thing it tried to stop. Churchianity needs to stop going on and on about sin and stare at Christ and preach Christ instead
I am not sure what I think about Sheila, but there this..."We are not going to talk about it as it cause men to sin." You can MOST definitely teach modesty with our blaming girls/women (or anyone) for someone else's sin!!!
That being said, I think the problems she is bringing to light and doesn't even realize it, Youth Ministry might be the bigger issue than purity culture downfalls.
One of the RUclips channels enquiring about this subject has as their motto: "Purity Culture is Rape Culture". At first I was shocked but the more I learned the more I agreed. Both Boys and Girls were injured in different ways.
@@luckystoller6171 As I think about the subject, I see, maybe there is a difference between "Purity Culture" and "purity teaching".
I am just "thinking out loud", if you will. SO take it as just a thought process, not a statement of my beliefs. I think there are more nuances, than any of the broad stroke statement you, me or Sheila are making.
But I do agree, there are many injuries in the "Purity culture", than many realized.
When the focus is on actions instead of heart, that might be the real problem. Christ even addressed that, "The good person out of the good treasure of his heart produces good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure produces evil, for out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks." (Luke 6:45 ESV)
"Purity culture" focuses on purifying our actions, when we need to focus on purifying our hearts.
I guess, my problem with Sheila, is she is focusing on the problem and NOT focusing on the re solution. She is trying to purify action not the heart.
Again, this is just me thinking out loud.
What are your thoughts?
@@Caderic I believe she provides solutions in her books. In pointing out the problems she is simply allowing those who have been wounded to identify with the issues. She is pointing toward a more loving, healthy relationship in marriage. I like her light touch with the subject without trivializing it. You?
What is the issue with Youth Ministry as you see it?
@@luckystoller6171 As someone that was influenced, but only minorly, by purity culture, I think the problem is try to make our actions holy instead of making our hearts holy.
Having read some of Sheila's book and listen to her on many different podcasts and the like, she just swings the pendulum of actions to the other side instead of addressing holiness of the heart. Some times that looks very similar but it is not the same.
Really, I don't have a problem with youth ministry in and of itself. What I have a problem with is how it is generally done.
It to is where making our actions holy is pushed as apposed to making our hearts holy. This is a long and drawn out subject, not fit for the comment sections, but there are MANY nuances and caveats that go with it.