Same!! I cannot be out here kee-keeing in these streets when there’s work to be done. Catch me in about 5-10 business months ✌🏽. I need my money to be right!!
Hey what are you black people gonna do when the white man's money system collapses? Like why do you black people rely on money for relationships and dating when white people invented to tear black men and women apart?
💯% correct As a man you're supposed to have your career, good credit, financially stable or higher and have your own home/Condo. No man should not be out here chasing women when you have nothing in order to offer or help. 🤷🏿♂️ Now if the man is trying to better himself with these qualities then a woman might consider dating but if he is not attempting to get his life in order ladies leave him where he stands this goes for men and women.
Yes I agree he was trying to use me for my money and my credit and house and cars I said to him Damn do you come to the table with anything other than your body.I left that alone real quick
Problem is, the gender social traditionalism alot of folks trying to bring back and back then most women were broke and had to seek a man for resources and financial security, so what applies to man, "shouldn't" apply to women, if the relationship is going for the standard, problem tho is the abuse and taking for granted another of western American women go for, when it come for the guy to purchase a $1000 Gucci bag, vs. $1000 of supplies as a priority for groceries/food supplies, etc. Also it is easier to say then do, not saying it out of laziness, but, based on my observations on these social relationship issues, it seems like the unrealistic expectations, entitlement from modern women, collide and causes friction with unrealistic, sometimes low, qualifications and the "trophy wife" mentality, which, in lamest terms, alot of guys keep looking at 304s cause of some guys sexual tendencies that the 304 women exploit men (unless those men are part of the LGBTQ+ community, then that is a different story) otherwise, modernism and traditionalist is always going to be butting heads with each other. So it is hard to say in the modern way, what a man and women supposed to have, vs. What they really have, in reality, of the relationship.
Agreed! I met my husband at his absolute lowest point in 2010. He’d been successfully self employed (construction) for years but when the market shifted in 2008, he was impacted and by 2010, he had nothing. I believed in him very much though. His talent and eye are unsurpassed so I shared with him my mindset - We all will experience highs and lows in life; our value is not connected to that; if at the very bottom, you have the determination and drive to get up from that place, I’ll stand by you and support you 1000% - but I will not wallow in that place with you, if that’s where you choose to stay. It didn’t happen overnight, nor by the time we married (I still had the stable income at the time) but after about 1.5 years into our marriage, everything he lost was restored and more!!! We’ve been able to live consistently above what I ever imagined. He never used me, always did whatever he could to provide. I’m not saying there weren’t tough moments within that 1.5 years, but God turned it all around and 10yrs later he’s still prospering financially, in business, assets, etc. To anyone who seems to be at their lowest…please be encouraged! You don’t have to stay in that place. Find the strength within yourself to get up - do what you can and trust God for the supernatural. Your testimony is in front of you. Get up.
I was married to someone that had money and lost it and he changed. Treated me like trash, was disrespectful, and broken as you describe. I MARRIED him.for better or worse, but clearly he didn't marry me for his worse. I left because emotional and verbal abuse along with withholding affection (sex) because money is tight is like slowly killing someone. Money is the root to all evil. Mistreating someone because of $$ is evil. Yeah, it takes money to live, but a good woman will roll with you if she knows you care about her even if you hit a rough patch. If money is the catalyst and controls how you treat a spose, the relationship is broke too. If you ain't right unless your money right, then you ain't right. While I understand the truth spoken. Broke people (Spiritually) break people. Fix that broke and the rest will work itself out. EDIT: For those who are tangled up in the omission of love in the statement about money, you're correct as it relates to scripture but when I originally wrote this I was thinking about the way the money made my ex act, which was evil. The love on money is indeed the root of all evil. Sorry to those who were triggered by the way I explained my story.
@@tanishabowen1109 Thank for pointing that out "the LOVE OF MONEY" People over look that in the Bible... Also when you get chance look up Ecclesiastes 7:12.
I met a man completely BROKE with not a dollar to his name wanting a relationship with me a woman who has a career and her own house and cars telling me to give him money I told him I can’t be the giver all of the time I thank God I let him go I told him I can’t be your mother..I don’t need a son to care for a need a grown man one who can provide for himself and this man just couldn’t do it he wasn’t even trying to look for a job always talking about what I need to do with my money I told him stop worrying about my money and get your own money I can’t with broke men I’m just not interested I rather stay single loving myself and spoiling myself than giving a non appreciated man my hard earned money
I could certainly accept a man with financial issues if he were TRYING…if he had a REAL plan in place but Not someone who is ALWAYS in need and then to have bad behaviors to top it off? No never… A humble, kind, respectable man who is trying and want to spend time?Absolutely!
Okay they shouldn't date or engaged in relationship unless he is financially stable. This man achieved financial success and NOW he has the privilege to pursue a relationship what makes the woman how dismissed him for being poor that it would be her because now he has options please clarify. And in your context financially stable or successful men have the right to holler at a woman no matter if the man is good, bad, married or single.
I agree 120%! When I didn’t have any type of income coming in for awhile, I isolated myself because my MIND wasn’t right since my MONEY wasn’t right. ONLY BROKE MINDED people become COMFORTABLE being Broke so therefore they usually STAY BROKE.
A woman said this and she was called s gold digger. She said if a man's finances are in disarray, he shouldn't be dating. He will not give you his full attention if he's worried about his next paycheck. And if you "carry" him, he may not stay with you once he is stable because you've seen him being "weak"
There's a fine line to only wanting to date someone for their money, and wanting to deal with someone stable. How could that ever be considered gold digging?
@@lejonsifford3493 oh, there's comments put there exactly as she stated. I find it comical at best and already know those are the dusties n pookies...broke arses 😂😅
Exactly. Love can only take you so far. My whole mood changes when my finances ain't right and its disrespectful to try to get with someone else when my shit ain't together
Then you’re poor in a lot of other areas outside of money. When I started dating my wife we had a strict budget of 75 bucks per month (this is while living in NY). We had an amazing relationship when I was making 19 bucks an hour and she stuck with me until I was able to make six figures. Broke can be temporary and so can a relationship with someone who only wants to be there when you’re up
So tru..I just went through a horrible breakup my BF lost his job and he went straight into a deep depression no matter what I did for him to try to help out it didn't work I think me helping him with his bills made him feel less of a man and unfortunately our relationship couldn't survive what he was going through
What happened to you just happened to me… 3 weeks out from him walking away. He was SO DOWN! He told me he couldn’t give me what I wanted, needed and deserved. All I wanted was for him to keep the communication lines open. He was so depressed, he’d call but didn’t have anything to say. 😔♥️
Allllllll Facts! I personally saw how Heavenly everything was when he was Up & then saw how much he retracted and became distant when going through a down season. That change is drastic like he said. Only thing really to do ladies is to give him the space and time to work out his life. A real man wants to handle his stuff on his own no matter how much “we”would love to jump in, help, and save the day.
Learned this the hard way not to long ago, my naturing spirit couldn't fix it and I didn't realize it till he got super distant...guess out timing wasn't right....
My boyfriend just broke up with me behind this very thing. It’s heartbreaking because our/his financial situation is due to his decision making. I never quit on him when times get tough (because most circumstances are temporary) so it hurts me that he did that with me. Oh and I work too but I’m very mindful not to let the condition make me be mean to others or those around me and if so definitely make my apologies. It’s ok to not be your best self sometimes…just do your best not to be mean spirited. Life is going to happen.
Very powerful message. But why break that same woman you love & that loves you back as well as supports you...... How is that fair to her to her, her mental health, emotional wellness, etc. That's total strain on her.
Unfortunately, we live in a me,me, me era. People don't want to do the work of bettering themselves and getting things together not just for their own benefit but also those they supposedly love/will be with
People who are BROKE should get their finances in order before even entertaining the idea of dating or marriage because lack of finances will ruin a relationship. It’s hard to even have intimacy when there is stress from financial problems.
I had to send this to my son! I asked him to not to get into a relationship until he gets his self together. I think he think I don’t want to see him happy and I do! I always said I will not date a man first without a job and more importantly like his work or at least get something out of it.
Correct Me and my ex relationship ended this way. The last 6 months was like i was in the relationship alone. I was taking care of things but he himself was what u said.. not right.. he was everything but the nan i could recognize..when i tried to talk to him nothing.. no love..no smiles..no nothing.. it was so so lonely then he got so mean and random and i couldnt except the disrespect..
"Romance without FINANCE is ignorance!" (African Proverb) A man needs to be financially stable before involving a woman into this dysfunctional thinking.
this really resonated with me because a rough time in our marriage was when we had twins and we were struggling to even afford the food for them and all I did was go to work and when I wasn't at work I searched for work for more money but it really put a strain on my marriage and it's crazy that I never put two and two together as of why
Here we go.... When I met my woman I was making $16 an hour... Now I make over $200k a year. I know she is not here for the money because she was dating me when I was *broke* .... Grilled cheese sandwiches and soup broke. She was with me through the storm Think about that...
He’s talking about a man who is struggling while being a black cloud wherever he go due to not having the amount of money he desire that can be angry, combative, belligerent, hostile, tempered, projecting the list goes on. Your woman was okay with you because you brought more to the table. It’s not just about money it’s about positivity, laughing, ambition, mental emotional support, can someone learn from you, are you protective, provision, a man with a plan. Men provide way more than money to a relationship/ marriage, do you have character. A man with character will always have and produce. A woman will not submit to any man that does not make her feel safe.
@@Mercedesthegift again ... Here we go.... You don't think I didn't feel that way. It's called controlling your anger and redirecting energy. I used the way I felt to become successful not take it out on my girl. All men feel some type of way to a degree.... Especially broke men. It's all about your mindset.... A broke man could be at peace and a rich man could be miserable 🤷🏾♂️.
I hear u Sir and I love everything that u be blessing me with (giving me the male point of view), HOWEVER, ON THE OTHER HAND, BUT, there HAS to be something else INSIDE of the individual. Be careful not to have the LOVE of the money. Where is the free Joy? Where is Jesus? (speaking to those Believers). Not Romantic any longer? Put a blanket on the floor in the bedroom and light a candle. If all u have is convo then Honey u better talk. A walk in the park. It shouldnt have that much power over u. Your best self is without money. The money is the extra blessing. I feel u should be your best version without money. The money brings perks, it shouldn't make u. I do get your point though. I have and at times still not have enough...but GOD. I'm still gonna smile, I'm still gonna love, help and give my time...and do anything I can that doesn't require money. I love u Krew Season!!! Peace Men
Your just in between Blessings and you should have someone that can back you up. It should not always be about money and you are what you speak. Never say your Broke because you are not speaking life into yourself.💚💚🙏🏽🙏🏽💪🏽💪🏽
If a ninja is broke..then he's broke. Speak the truth and the truth shall set you free. To H with all that sentiment. That's not reality. Reality is admitting the problem speak it out loud and then do something about. You hate your life change your life.. and don't be looking out for no back up.. you are your own backup it's that simple. Be real
That's how people are. I'm a Scorpio and if my money isn't right I can't settle in my heart chakra. We thrive on stability. Mentally, financially, and spiritually.
When he lost that money, I picked up the slack and helped him get back on track. He always held us down, so me picking up where he left off was the least I could do. He's back making money, and I kept my job. We will never be in that position again. No woman wants to see her man down and out. Real women reassure that man that he is still the MAN. We all fall short, sometimes, and that's y it's important to choose your mate wisely. #teamwork
I avoid social media and dating right now as I am transitioning into my next chapter. I should get off RUclips and put all my time into my goals, but this is my last little guilty pleasure.
Nah. That’s only true if someone is taking care of him. Other than that he would starve to death or be homeless if he was content with being broke. Also most people’s definition of broke vary depending on who you ask.
I’ve commented this under someone’s comment earlier, but I thought I should point out: It is the idolization of money and what it can bring that is EVEN WORSE. The mentality of “If my money isn’t good, then I’m not good”, means exactly that, you aren’t “good”. Money at that point is your idol if it has that much control in your life. Be great in all seasons, not just “good” when it suits you and weather the storm. That’s what having relationships are about. I agree that if you are someone who shuts down and internalizes things in hard times you shouldn’t be dating, you should be in THERAPY. If you’re already in a relationship or married, then y’all both need therapy. I recognize I am this person (not about money but about other issues). Sometimes I just isolate, which is fine, but I recognize that it’s important for me to share what’s going on with those I trust so that they’re not completely in the dark, and to not completely shut down the important parts of myself just because things are not right externally. Gotta build your self internally to weather out life’s storms.
I said something similar. Americans seem to idolize money over God. Take away all my money today, I'm still a man. I'll grind my way back. And a wise woman would know that I won't be broke for long. If you think money makes you a man, you're not. You're just a male
I need this on a T-shirt ❤ It’s way too many Black Men out here not only Broke, they have no home, decent credit,or apartment & they are very comfortable.🤔
Living with, being taken care of (housed, clothed, fed), provided transportation (with a revoked driver’s license), no employment, and engaged…… smh…. True story… so sad…
I tell all of my Home Boy's to get their stuff together. Have a job, have a vehicle, have a place of your own that you are paying off, and invest in something. Once that is done, no pressure when they hit the dating scene.
This right here is real. I try to cheer him up, I try to let him know it will get better ect. Only thing you can do is be there & let him go threw the motions. My man knows he never has to go without or go threw anything alone bc I got him for life 🖤
This where most women leave because they don’t wanna be there when you in the rebuilding stage. But want you to be there when she rebuild after her setbacks. Sad but tru
My man's doing this right now... he snaps over the smallest sh** .. n he did have money when we met but as mant times as I tell him I don't care about what he can buy for me or give me all I want is his loyalty respect and love but it don't matter how many times I say it it annoys him bc he wants summer to come so he can work and get back to the money he used to make
So true..most men determine their manhood, self esteem, value by their money. He will definitely withdraw, women cant fix it, he has to feel like the man.
Well...stop that. You don't have to fall apart or stop being romantic bc money's tight, you are doing so bc you're self focused. Stop. Pay attention to your partner. They're there to help.
Thank You‼️IVE BEEN SAYING THIS FOR YEARS‼️MY EX STRUGGLE WITH MONEY ALL THE TIME AND HE WAS NASTY, COLD, JEALOUS, CONTROLLING AND HURTFUL for those 2 HORRIFYING YEARS. I always told him...THE PROBLEM WITH YOU WAS HIS "POCKETS" weren't right & HE REFUSED to get a side gig,‼️I had an extra hustle (Always had a few dollars stashed)...but he refused...CLOWN IN A DAME CROWN ✅✅✅‼️‼️‼️‼️
He will take a position to pay the bills and we will continue to bring our bread to the table. If he was right when he was up it’s no issue to weather the storm with him. Together❤
@Mattias LP. uh, she didn't get Pregnant by Herself??? Watch what you Saying Mattias LP. Some of the Mental Issues come from No Real Leadership from the MAN!!! He is the LEADER. Be RIGHT Do RIGHT.
If He's A Man That Is Lead By Money,That Type Of Man Will Struggle. If A Man Is Lead By God, He won't struggle as much if at all because he knows who supply ALL of his needs.This is why I don't have time to entertain a man who's not aligned with God and The Word of God.
Same with women, shouldn’t be dating while broke. should not be flying out to see some dude if she doesn’t have an emergency fund to cover her own hotel costs, food and flight back home if the guy decides to do her dirty
Incorrext..that's a boys mentality..a man. Creates thru wit or wit out ...naw only those who value money more than self..cause a man with skills..never see it as that...money don't make tha man it sets tha scenery
He can have skills and even the confidence outside of money which is how he should be but getting in a relationship with the intention of marriage should be with the sufficient funds required to take responsibility in areas a man should in a relationship. A broke man can’t lead (entirely) and raise kids.
THANK YOU! Strip me of my money, I'm STILL a man and I WOULDN'T capitulate. What makes me a man? My mental resilience, physical features, presence, mentality & standing up for what I believe it. I value money highly, but I don't worship it. No real man should. You think Ali was tripping off money when they told him go to jail or go to Vietnam? He said f money & fame, I'm standing up for what I believe. THAT is a man. No man made thing could put me in depression EVER. It's crazy that our pov isn't the norm. There's a lot of males out here, not men. Women are exposing themselves too for having money as more important than character.
He makes a lot of great points......with that said, there are several things to consider. 1) Define broke? Most people in Western society live pay check to pay check. Are we defining broke as having 0. Or are we defining broke as in financially insecure. If we are referring to the later, than we must reevaluate MOST relationships. 2) If people shouldn't be in relationships broke, they shouldn't be having sex either. Why draw the line for relationships, but not having sex, risking pregnancy? If we are going to place financial standards on dating, than we need to do the same with sex.
I think broke in the sense that u have to compromise basic necessities just to accommodate the woman u want to attract I think the implication of not having sex while broke is implied in his “dating” comment. But some men lack discipline and women lack boundaries as the gatekeepers of sex.
@@tanishabowen1109 For me, that should be emphasized more than dating. I understand that if a person is truly broke, their minds aren't fully on the person they are dating. However, having children while broke is a bigger issue. Or even if you are broke, at least have a plan in place.
@kendrick8749 I appreciate this response. I suppose that compromising necessities could be determined by the type of woman you are dating also. Some women require/demand more from dating than others. When I listened to this brother's video, he framed it as if a broke man dating would be distracted by his circumstances. His state of being broke would overrule his interest in the woman. My thing is, financial requirements related to dating is fine as long as people are in agreement when it comes to not having sex when broke. You can potentially not be dating anyone and still be having reckless, undisciplined sex.
We think very alike. Was an ignorant comment from Trill. Money isn't everything & shouldn't make a man. If 2 broke people meet & genuinely care for each other, let them build. And you're right, what's "broke"? Is it paycheck to paycheck or absolutely no money? If it's the former, at least 50% of people out here are broke. If they stop dating/ having sex, humanity would cease.
Facts 💯!!! And Drug dealers/ illegal hustlers will ALWAYS keep that mentality even with $100,000+ in the stash.. It's still not security, he still isn't stable..
Encourage him, inspire him. Change habits, make sacrifices, and be disciplined. It's not his money, it's y'all money. Not everyone was taught the best or right ways to deal with finances. As long as he's willing to work towards improving the situation, you're good. Save, build an emergency fund, invest. Find a better paying job. Where theres there's a way.
Same for single women, cuz they take on the provider role. AND when u have a man and u have to support him through this, the woman puts these feeling aside to support him through his worries (which will eventually help him fix the problem), it's double weight.
Your ability to be alright shouldn’t depend on external factors. Grown ups know that life is change. There is not much that is gained that can’t also be lost and gained again. But if you are good inside then you are truly good. Women and children need that kind of stability.
yeah he starts cheating even if he's married after decades. It's sad if some men lose their job, they step out on their spouses because he's lost his job. And seek value outside of his marital bed. He needs a complete strange women to boost his ego. Funny thing is also when he gets his money back he still cheats if his character is broken. Pray for the men who attach their value to money. Especially if the wife got his back and honors the vows "for richer or for poorer." sigh...
No he thought he could stay in bed all day and I could fit the bill for everything ! Naw I definitely wasn’t down for that! I exited immediately! I am not your mommy!
That’s what I said “ if a man’s money 💰 isn’t where it should be then he should not be dating! The man should go into Discovery 💡this go for women too , but men are the providers, and protectors!😊
Powerful message indeed. Made me realize something. Thank you & God bless you for the content you share by just empowering and alerting women. ❤️ Sorry to say, but you look like you're the real "Madea's" son. I forgot his real name😂😂
I completely agree with this and yet I don't cuz when your both broke when you met I think it's a beautiful thing cuz you both get to know each other when your both down and out so at least if it happens in your relationship you both know how do handle rock bottom stuff. Especially when both of you have had everything.
Just watched an episode of true crime. This girl was offed by her baby daddy. Two kids boy and a girl and another one on the way (pure stupidity and madness lol) She tried to leave him multiple times but they keep getting back together. She was working and taking care of her children as well as sponsorsing the broke ninjas life. During one of their brakeup arguments he lit her up 9x.. now her family is saying he was lazy and didn't want to work and that he should have let her be. But their raggedy behinds were there claiming he was a "nice" guy and didn't seem to be the type to pull such *effery* .. everybody is gonna learn one of these days and the ones that refuse to learn after having multiple children with a complete bum will be the ones made an example of. Even the silly family members that sit there and watch their loved ones engage in shear stupidity are also gonna be an example for other families that don't intervene before calamity hit 🎯
Broke is different than broken. Broke may be temporary. Broke may also be perception. Some people feel broke with a few thousand dollars in the bank. Others are okay if the bills are paid and there's some left over. Just make sure his heart, spirit, and character are not shattered beyond repair and that the has developed his character in life. If he is broken, he needs to heal before a relationship. It's not about money, but about your relationship with money, how you value yourself, and where your faith lies (in your back account, your IRA, your closet?) Personally, if he trusts God, it will make it easier for me to trust and to follow him, if we're talking marriage. (personally, I don't see the point in dating if we're not looking at marriage as a possibility anyway).
Finance planners will tell you that you need to have in your savings 3 to 6 months of your monthly expenses saved up/stashed away at all times. Ain't nobody going to be funny and telling jokes if his or finances are in the toilet.
I'm a woman and I feel this way when I'm broke. Laying up with someone is the last thing on my mind when my funds aren't right
Exactly! I wouldn't even want to be with a man if my money wasn't right.
I'm a woman as well and I'm that exact same way.
Me too!! When I see my account looking shabby, I pick up a few extra shifts!!
Same!! I cannot be out here kee-keeing in these streets when there’s work to be done. Catch me in about 5-10 business months ✌🏽. I need my money to be right!!
Meeeee toooooo
"Romance without finance is a damn nuisance"....
Ain't that the truth!
@Queen Pur-reach 💯
@@positivevibe7684
😜👋🏾
Modern women are prostitutes
Hey what are you black people gonna do when the white man's money system collapses? Like why do you black people rely on money for relationships and dating when white people invented to tear black men and women apart?
While going through all those emotions, they still find enough strength to cheat.
I think it’s because he feels he needs a distraction. Clearly he will be experiencing low self esteem and insecurity. Sad.
😂
That part
@@lorrainebrett7765 hell I b his distraction....he thinks another bitch makes a better one? Lmaooo
@@lorrainebrett7765 Then he should stay with the distraction.
💯% correct As a man you're supposed to have your career, good credit, financially stable or higher and have your own home/Condo. No man should not be out here chasing women when you have nothing in order to offer or help. 🤷🏿♂️ Now if the man is trying to better himself with these qualities then a woman might consider dating but if he is not attempting to get his life in order ladies leave him where he stands this goes for men and women.
Yes I agree he was trying to use me for my money and my credit and house and cars I said to him Damn do you come to the table with anything other than your body.I left that alone real quick
Problem is, the gender social traditionalism alot of folks trying to bring back and back then most women were broke and had to seek a man for resources and financial security, so what applies to man, "shouldn't" apply to women, if the relationship is going for the standard, problem tho is the abuse and taking for granted another of western American women go for, when it come for the guy to purchase a $1000 Gucci bag, vs. $1000 of supplies as a priority for groceries/food supplies, etc. Also it is easier to say then do, not saying it out of laziness, but, based on my observations on these social relationship issues, it seems like the unrealistic expectations, entitlement from modern women, collide and causes friction with unrealistic, sometimes low, qualifications and the "trophy wife" mentality, which, in lamest terms, alot of guys keep looking at 304s cause of some guys sexual tendencies that the 304 women exploit men (unless those men are part of the LGBTQ+ community, then that is a different story) otherwise, modernism and traditionalist is always going to be butting heads with each other. So it is hard to say in the modern way, what a man and women supposed to have, vs. What they really have, in reality, of the relationship.
Sounds about right
Agreed! I met my husband at his absolute lowest point in 2010. He’d been successfully self employed (construction) for years but when the market shifted in 2008, he was impacted and by 2010, he had nothing. I believed in him very much though. His talent and eye are unsurpassed so I shared with him my mindset - We all will experience highs and lows in life; our value is not connected to that; if at the very bottom, you have the determination and drive to get up from that place, I’ll stand by you and support you 1000% - but I will not wallow in that place with you, if that’s where you choose to stay. It didn’t happen overnight, nor by the time we married (I still had the stable income at the time) but after about 1.5 years into our marriage, everything he lost was restored and more!!! We’ve been able to live consistently above what I ever imagined. He never used me, always did whatever he could to provide. I’m not saying there weren’t tough moments within that 1.5 years, but God turned it all around and 10yrs later he’s still prospering financially, in business, assets, etc. To anyone who seems to be at their lowest…please be encouraged! You don’t have to stay in that place. Find the strength within yourself to get up - do what you can and trust God for the supernatural. Your testimony is in front of you. Get up.
Money is you American's God. If everyone had that mentality, humanity would've been extinct long time ago.
Money doesn't make a man at all.
As a man you cant let money bother us .. if money got us that broken we need to fix our spirit..
Yes exactly my point
👑👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
@Lucy Bonilla goes for yall too lol
In the Name of Jesus
Definitely agree. Not having money should not equal unhappiness,
I know men who are so used to being broke that they are just fine in that state. Lauging, joking and free loading.
They are not men …they’re boys
The last part 😂😅
I was married to someone that had money and lost it and he changed. Treated me like trash, was disrespectful, and broken as you describe. I MARRIED him.for better or worse, but clearly he didn't marry me for his worse. I left because emotional and verbal abuse along with withholding affection (sex) because money is tight is like slowly killing someone. Money is the root to all evil. Mistreating someone because of $$ is evil. Yeah, it takes money to live, but a good woman will roll with you if she knows you care about her even if you hit a rough patch. If money is the catalyst and controls how you treat a spose, the relationship is broke too. If you ain't right unless your money right, then you ain't right. While I understand the truth spoken. Broke people (Spiritually) break people. Fix that broke and the rest will work itself out.
EDIT: For those who are tangled up in the omission of love in the statement about money, you're correct as it relates to scripture but when I originally wrote this I was thinking about the way the money made my ex act, which was evil. The love on money is indeed the root of all evil. Sorry to those who were triggered by the way I explained my story.
Your absolutely the truth God will eventually let us see good from evil ..God bless you and your family
👑👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Money itself isn't evil, it's a tool. The LOVE of money is the root of all evil.
I experienced some of this, never again!!!
@@tanishabowen1109 Thank for pointing that out "the LOVE OF MONEY" People over look that in the Bible... Also when you get chance look up Ecclesiastes 7:12.
I met a man completely BROKE with not a dollar to his name wanting a relationship with me a woman who has a career and her own house and cars telling me to give him money I told him I can’t be the giver all of the time I thank God I let him go I told him I can’t be your mother..I don’t need a son to care for a need a grown man one who can provide for himself and this man just couldn’t do it he wasn’t even trying to look for a job always talking about what I need to do with my money I told him stop worrying about my money and get your own money I can’t with broke men I’m just not interested I rather stay single loving myself and spoiling myself than giving a non appreciated man my hard earned money
so you actually dated him and slept with him? says a lot.
I could certainly accept a man with financial issues if he were TRYING…if he had a REAL plan in place but Not someone who is ALWAYS in need and then to have bad behaviors to top it off? No never…
A humble, kind, respectable man who is trying and want to spend time?Absolutely!
I completely agree with you 100 percent
Yes the man I met had to many issues I can’t be his mother I need a grown man not a child
I have a job. R u still single?👀🌷
Money money money money. Wake up sheep
It's the American mindset. They worship money over everything
That’s how REAL mean are. These other ones don’t care.
Exactly 💯
EXACTLY
Broke men try to holler all the time, and they shouldn’t…! don’t nobody want a man with no ends 🤦🏽♀️
Okay they shouldn't date or engaged in relationship unless he is financially stable. This man achieved financial success and NOW he has the privilege to pursue a relationship what makes the woman how dismissed him for being poor that it would be her because now he has options please clarify.
And in your context financially stable or successful men have the right to holler at a woman no matter if the man is good, bad, married or single.
I agree 120%! When I didn’t have any type of income coming in for awhile, I isolated myself because my MIND wasn’t right since my MONEY wasn’t right. ONLY BROKE MINDED people become COMFORTABLE being Broke so therefore they usually STAY BROKE.
A woman said this and she was called s gold digger. She said if a man's finances are in disarray, he shouldn't be dating. He will not give you his full attention if he's worried about his next paycheck. And if you "carry" him, he may not stay with you once he is stable because you've seen him being "weak"
There's a fine line to only wanting to date someone for their money, and wanting to deal with someone stable. How could that ever be considered gold digging?
@@lejonsifford3493 Ask those men who constantly say women are gold diggers
@5x7m I happen to be a man and i know a few other men. Just haven't heard them label women wanting Men to be employed as gold diggers
@@lejonsifford3493 oh, there's comments put there exactly as she stated. I find it comical at best and already know those are the dusties n pookies...broke arses 😂😅
Please elaborate on why a man may not stay around because he has been seen as weak ? I’m very curious about this
Exactly. Love can only take you so far. My whole mood changes when my finances ain't right and its disrespectful to try to get with someone else when my shit ain't together
AMEN
It’s immature to treat someone bad because your money isn’t right. It just doesn’t make any sense at all
As a single woman, I have been working on myself...and expect a man to do the same 🙃🙂
Then you’re poor in a lot of other areas outside of money. When I started dating my wife we had a strict budget of 75 bucks per month (this is while living in NY). We had an amazing relationship when I was making 19 bucks an hour and she stuck with me until I was able to make six figures. Broke can be temporary and so can a relationship with someone who only wants to be there when you’re up
19 and hour is not broke.
@@JESUSLOVESYOU219 in nyc it is
@@JESUSLOVESYOU219 Sounds like he was the sole provider and in nyc, that’s why.
@@TheRalphie2020 looool no. It's nyc
@@TheRalphie2020 oh ok
So tru..I just went through a horrible breakup my BF lost his job and he went straight into a deep depression no matter what I did for him to try to help out it didn't work I think me helping him with his bills made him feel less of a man and unfortunately our relationship couldn't survive what he was going through
That’s his fault not yours.
What happened to you just happened to me… 3 weeks out from him walking away. He was SO DOWN! He told me he couldn’t give me what I wanted, needed and deserved. All I wanted was for him to keep the communication lines open. He was so depressed, he’d call but didn’t have anything to say. 😔♥️
And ladies you need to give that man his space to figure himself out.
Allllllll Facts! I personally saw how Heavenly everything was when he was Up & then saw how much he retracted and became distant when going through a down season. That change is drastic like he said. Only thing really to do ladies is to give him the space and time to work out his life. A real man wants to handle his stuff on his own no matter how much “we”would love to jump in, help, and save the day.
Learned this the hard way not to long ago, my naturing spirit couldn't fix it and I didn't realize it till he got super distant...guess out timing wasn't right....
My boyfriend just broke up with me behind this very thing. It’s heartbreaking because our/his financial situation is due to his decision making. I never quit on him when times get tough (because most circumstances are temporary) so it hurts me that he did that with me. Oh and I work too but I’m very mindful not to let the condition make me be mean to others or those around me and if so definitely make my apologies. It’s ok to not be your best self sometimes…just do your best not to be mean spirited. Life is going to happen.
Very powerful message. But why break that same woman you love & that loves you back as well as supports you...... How is that fair to her to her, her mental health, emotional wellness, etc. That's total strain on her.
Exactly
Unfortunately, we live in a me,me, me era. People don't want to do the work of bettering themselves and getting things together not just for their own benefit but also those they supposedly love/will be with
People who are BROKE should get their finances in order before even entertaining the idea of dating or marriage because lack of finances will ruin a relationship. It’s hard to even have intimacy when there is stress from financial problems.
Yaas 👏
I had to send this to my son! I asked him to not to get into a relationship until he gets his self together. I think he think I don’t want to see him happy and I do! I always said I will not date a man first without a job and more importantly like his work or at least get something out of it.
Correct
Me and my ex relationship ended this way. The last 6 months was like i was in the relationship alone. I was taking care of things but he himself was what u said.. not right.. he was everything but the nan i could recognize..when i tried to talk to him nothing.. no love..no smiles..no nothing.. it was so so lonely then he got so mean and random and i couldnt except the disrespect..
A man like that do not deserve a relationship, a woman. He needs to sit down somewhere and get his shit together. Period.
"Romance without FINANCE is ignorance!" (African Proverb) A man needs to be financially stable before involving a woman into this dysfunctional thinking.
this really resonated with me because a rough time in our marriage was when we had twins and we were struggling to even afford the food for them and all I did was go to work and when I wasn't at work I searched for work for more money but it really put a strain on my marriage and it's crazy that I never put two and two together as of why
My daddy told me: Romance without finance, is counterfeit ✨
Here we go.... When I met my woman I was making $16 an hour... Now I make over $200k a year. I know she is not here for the money because she was dating me when I was *broke* .... Grilled cheese sandwiches and soup broke.
She was with me through the storm
Think about that...
Money matter's SMH black men are so delusional bro it sad honestly.
@@coreythomas3633 I agree👊🏾
He’s talking about a man who is struggling while being a black cloud wherever he go due to not having the amount of money he desire that can be angry, combative, belligerent, hostile, tempered, projecting the list goes on. Your woman was okay with you because you brought more to the table. It’s not just about money it’s about positivity, laughing, ambition, mental emotional support, can someone learn from you, are you protective, provision, a man with a plan. Men provide way more than money to a relationship/ marriage, do you have character. A man with character will always have and produce. A woman will not submit to any man that does not make her feel safe.
@@Mercedesthegift again ... Here we go.... You don't think I didn't feel that way. It's called controlling your anger and redirecting energy. I used the way I felt to become successful not take it out on my girl. All men feel some type of way to a degree.... Especially broke men. It's all about your mindset.... A broke man could be at peace and a rich man could be miserable 🤷🏾♂️.
Tbh I support everything you saying
I hear u Sir and I love everything that u be blessing me with (giving me the male point of view), HOWEVER, ON THE OTHER HAND, BUT, there HAS to be something else INSIDE of the individual. Be careful not to have the LOVE of the money. Where is the free Joy? Where is Jesus? (speaking to those Believers). Not Romantic any longer? Put a blanket on the floor in the bedroom and light a candle. If all u have is convo then Honey u better talk. A walk in the park. It shouldnt have that much power over u. Your best self is without money. The money is the extra blessing. I feel u should be your best version without money. The money brings perks, it shouldn't make u. I do get your point though. I have and at times still not have enough...but GOD. I'm still gonna smile, I'm still gonna love, help and give my time...and do anything I can that doesn't require money. I love u Krew Season!!! Peace Men
❤👌🏾🙏🏽💕
Your just in between Blessings and you should have someone that can back you up. It should not always be about money and you are what you speak. Never say your Broke because you are not speaking life into yourself.💚💚🙏🏽🙏🏽💪🏽💪🏽
If a ninja is broke..then he's broke. Speak the truth and the truth shall set you free. To H with all that sentiment. That's not reality. Reality is admitting the problem speak it out loud and then do something about. You hate your life change your life.. and don't be looking out for no back up.. you are your own backup it's that simple. Be real
He's telling the truth I'm the type of woman that won't date a man that don't have his own money he have to be able to take care of himself
That's how people are. I'm a Scorpio and if my money isn't right I can't settle in my heart chakra. We thrive on stability. Mentally, financially, and spiritually.
True facts I'm not right mentally because my money is not right💯
Same for a woman! I won't even involve myself with anyone or anything until me and my finances are in order 💯
When he lost that money, I picked up the slack and helped him get back on track. He always held us down, so me picking up where he left off was the least I could do. He's back making money, and I kept my job. We will never be in that position again. No woman wants to see her man down and out. Real women reassure that man that he is still the MAN. We all fall short, sometimes, and that's y it's important to choose your mate wisely. #teamwork
Sounds like a miserable existence but more power to ya.
I avoid social media and dating right now as I am transitioning into my next chapter. I should get off RUclips and put all my time into my goals, but this is my last little guilty pleasure.
Don’t be too hard on yourself. Please don’t.
Correct! But the original broke nicca is happy in his brokenness because he doesn’t know anything better than broke.
Straight facts
Nah. That’s only true if someone is taking care of him. Other than that he would starve to death or be homeless if he was content with being broke. Also most people’s definition of broke vary depending on who you ask.
I’ve commented this under someone’s comment earlier, but I thought I should point out:
It is the idolization of money and what it can bring that is EVEN WORSE. The mentality of “If my money isn’t good, then I’m not good”, means exactly that, you aren’t “good”. Money at that point is your idol if it has that much control in your life. Be great in all seasons, not just “good” when it suits you and weather the storm. That’s what having relationships are about. I agree that if you are someone who shuts down and internalizes things in hard times you shouldn’t be dating, you should be in THERAPY. If you’re already in a relationship or married, then y’all both need therapy. I recognize I am this person (not about money but about other issues). Sometimes I just isolate, which is fine, but I recognize that it’s important for me to share what’s going on with those I trust so that they’re not completely in the dark, and to not completely shut down the important parts of myself just because things are not right externally. Gotta build your self internally to weather out life’s storms.
I said something similar. Americans seem to idolize money over God. Take away all my money today, I'm still a man. I'll grind my way back.
And a wise woman would know that I won't be broke for long.
If you think money makes you a man, you're not. You're just a male
I very much agree, but you're talking about mental and emotional maturity. Most people won't touch that until later in life.
I need this on a T-shirt ❤
It’s way too many Black Men out here not only Broke, they have no home, decent credit,or apartment & they are very comfortable.🤔
Living with, being taken care of (housed, clothed, fed), provided transportation (with a revoked driver’s license), no employment, and engaged…… smh…. True story… so sad…
He speaking facts!
Facts, let that person focus and gain control of their finances. Then date, do not move broke men or women in your house. Period!!
I tell all of my Home Boy's to get their stuff together. Have a job, have a vehicle, have a place of your own that you are paying off, and invest in something. Once that is done, no pressure when they hit the dating scene.
I learned this about men the hard way. I understand now.
Very true! It's not the idea that the money is everything, it helps reinforce being a provider, and having that financial security flowing.
This right here is real. I try to cheer him up, I try to let him know it will get better ect. Only thing you can do is be there & let him go threw the motions. My man knows he never has to go without or go threw anything alone bc I got him for life 🖤
That's a man that's serious about himself
This where most women leave because they don’t wanna be there when you in the rebuilding stage. But want you to be there when she rebuild after her setbacks. Sad but tru
My man's doing this right now... he snaps over the smallest sh** .. n he did have money when we met but as mant times as I tell him I don't care about what he can buy for me or give me all I want is his loyalty respect and love but it don't matter how many times I say it it annoys him bc he wants summer to come so he can work and get back to the money he used to make
It's the struggle that gives us the blues.Knowing how to deal with it is key. Fake it til ya make it.
And women either
Ok that's true but why do they bring u down the relationship an then use you as a punching bag an then cheat
That's why, he answered 🙄 get a clue
@@rondas7772 if I knew that's was the question. Would I have replied that. Thanks for ur clue 🤔
What sucks is, when it happens and your partner doesn't help you and gets mad at you for being off.
So true..most men determine their manhood, self esteem, value by their money. He will definitely withdraw, women cant fix it, he has to feel like the man.
Preaching from the 1st sentence!
Well...stop that. You don't have to fall apart or stop being romantic bc money's tight, you are doing so bc you're self focused. Stop. Pay attention to your partner. They're there to help.
Thank You‼️IVE BEEN SAYING THIS FOR YEARS‼️MY EX STRUGGLE WITH MONEY ALL THE TIME AND HE WAS NASTY, COLD, JEALOUS, CONTROLLING AND HURTFUL for those 2 HORRIFYING YEARS. I always told him...THE PROBLEM WITH YOU WAS HIS "POCKETS" weren't right & HE REFUSED to get a side gig,‼️I had an extra hustle (Always had a few dollars stashed)...but he refused...CLOWN IN A DAME CROWN ✅✅✅‼️‼️‼️‼️
He will take a position to pay the bills and we will continue to bring our bread to the table. If he was right when he was up it’s no issue to weather the storm with him. Together❤
Truth be told an adult woman feels likewise #nuthnbutwisdom keep speaking #realspill
Somebody had to say. Glad you said it. Nobody wants to hear this when women say it.
goes for women as well. broke, pregnant and mentally unstable women shouldn’t be dating.
😒
@Mattias LP. uh, she didn't get Pregnant by Herself??? Watch what you Saying Mattias LP. Some of the Mental Issues come from No Real Leadership from the MAN!!! He is the LEADER. Be RIGHT Do RIGHT.
WHY ARE YA LOOKING FOR WOMEN WITH MONEY NONSEXUAL.
If He's A Man That Is Lead By Money,That Type Of Man Will Struggle. If A Man Is Lead By God, He won't struggle as much if at all because he knows who supply ALL of his needs.This is why I don't have time to entertain a man who's not aligned with God and The Word of God.
Now that's the truth!
Unique mentality
Yes!!
Facts
Man has to best self regardless to his pockets. His heart, and ability to love should not change under any circumstances.
Bullshit. Only men with no money talk like this
Same with women, shouldn’t be dating while broke. should not be flying out to see some dude if she doesn’t have an emergency fund to cover her own hotel costs, food and flight back home if the guy decides to do her dirty
Incorrext..that's a boys mentality..a man. Creates thru wit or wit out ...naw only those who value money more than self..cause a man with skills..never see it as that...money don't make tha man it sets tha scenery
He can have skills and even the confidence outside of money which is how he should be but getting in a relationship with the intention of marriage should be with the sufficient funds required to take responsibility in areas a man should in a relationship. A broke man can’t lead (entirely) and raise kids.
Agree with you money don't make a man
Money doesn’t make the man but it sure helps to have your own
@@KDaniels-iw5mc money matters boy ya delusional and stupid.
THANK YOU! Strip me of my money, I'm STILL a man and I WOULDN'T capitulate. What makes me a man? My mental resilience, physical features, presence, mentality & standing up for what I believe it.
I value money highly, but I don't worship it. No real man should. You think Ali was tripping off money when they told him go to jail or go to Vietnam? He said f money & fame, I'm standing up for what I believe.
THAT is a man. No man made thing could put me in depression EVER.
It's crazy that our pov isn't the norm. There's a lot of males out here, not men. Women are exposing themselves too for having money as more important than character.
He makes a lot of great points......with that said, there are several things to consider.
1) Define broke? Most people in Western society live pay check to pay check. Are we defining broke as having 0. Or are we defining broke as in financially insecure. If we are referring to the later, than we must reevaluate MOST relationships.
2) If people shouldn't be in relationships broke, they shouldn't be having sex either. Why draw the line for relationships, but not having sex, risking pregnancy? If we are going to place financial standards on dating, than we need to do the same with sex.
They don't need to have sex to bring children into the struggle.
I think broke in the sense that u have to compromise basic necessities just to accommodate the woman u want to attract
I think the implication of not having sex while broke is implied in his “dating” comment. But some men lack discipline and women lack boundaries as the gatekeepers of sex.
@@tanishabowen1109 For me, that should be emphasized more than dating. I understand that if a person is truly broke, their minds aren't fully on the person they are dating. However, having children while broke is a bigger issue. Or even if you are broke, at least have a plan in place.
@kendrick8749 I appreciate this response. I suppose that compromising necessities could be determined by the type of woman you are dating also. Some women require/demand more from dating than others.
When I listened to this brother's video, he framed it as if a broke man dating would be distracted by his circumstances. His state of being broke would overrule his interest in the woman. My thing is, financial requirements related to dating is fine as long as people are in agreement when it comes to not having sex when broke. You can potentially not be dating anyone and still be having reckless, undisciplined sex.
We think very alike. Was an ignorant comment from Trill. Money isn't everything & shouldn't make a man.
If 2 broke people meet & genuinely care for each other, let them build.
And you're right, what's "broke"? Is it paycheck to paycheck or absolutely no money? If it's the former, at least 50% of people out here are broke.
If they stop dating/ having sex, humanity would cease.
yea but you can't avoid love u should be able to get lovw and family I dont wanna chase the money and have mo family time
I hear you Brother. Totally understand and agree.
Agreed
Facts 💯!!! And Drug dealers/ illegal hustlers will ALWAYS keep that mentality even with $100,000+ in the stash.. It's still not security, he still isn't stable..
Not all men are like this
what if we're married college sweethearts and his money still ain't right at age 30?
Encourage him, inspire him. Change habits, make sacrifices, and be disciplined. It's not his money, it's y'all money. Not everyone was taught the best or right ways to deal with finances. As long as he's willing to work towards improving the situation, you're good. Save, build an emergency fund, invest. Find a better paying job. Where theres there's a way.
30 is still young and the job market sucks. What did you expect when you signed up for marriage
my man feels the same I understand him I motivate him
Same for single women, cuz they take on the provider role. AND when u have a man and u have to support him through this, the woman puts these feeling aside to support him through his worries (which will eventually help him fix the problem), it's double weight.
Your ability to be alright shouldn’t depend on external factors. Grown ups know that life is change. There is not much that is gained that can’t also be lost and gained again. But if you are good inside then you are truly good. Women and children need that kind of stability.
yeah he starts cheating even if he's married after decades. It's sad if some men lose their job, they step out on their spouses because he's lost his job. And seek value outside of his marital bed. He needs a complete strange women to boost his ego. Funny thing is also when he gets his money back he still cheats if his character is broken. Pray for the men who attach their value to money. Especially if the wife got his back and honors the vows "for richer or for poorer." sigh...
Facts. When I'm broke it's like everything else is secondary.
No he thought he could stay in bed all day and I could fit the bill for everything ! Naw I definitely wasn’t down for that! I exited immediately! I am not your mommy!
That’s what I said “ if a man’s money 💰 isn’t where it should be then he should not be dating! The man should go into Discovery 💡this go for women too , but men are the providers, and protectors!😊
Powerful message indeed. Made me realize something. Thank you & God bless you for the content you share by just empowering and alerting women. ❤️
Sorry to say, but you look like you're the real "Madea's" son. I forgot his real name😂😂
Tyler Perry
I completely agree with this and yet I don't cuz when your both broke when you met I think it's a beautiful thing cuz you both get to know each other when your both down and out so at least if it happens in your relationship you both know how do handle rock bottom stuff. Especially when both of you have had everything.
When my Ex got fired-he continued his cheating & lying -no need to mention how he became abusive. 🙄
Just watched an episode of true crime. This girl was offed by her baby daddy. Two kids boy and a girl and another one on the way (pure stupidity and madness lol) She tried to leave him multiple times but they keep getting back together. She was working and taking care of her children as well as sponsorsing the broke ninjas life. During one of their brakeup arguments he lit her up 9x.. now her family is saying he was lazy and didn't want to work and that he should have let her be. But their raggedy behinds were there claiming he was a "nice" guy and didn't seem to be the type to pull such *effery* .. everybody is gonna learn one of these days and the ones that refuse to learn after having multiple children with a complete bum will be the ones made an example of. Even the silly family members that sit there and watch their loved ones engage in shear stupidity are also gonna be an example for other families that don't intervene before calamity hit 🎯
Very true
Thank you thank you!!!!!!!!!
I'm a woman and I feel the same way
Broke is different than broken. Broke may be temporary. Broke may also be perception. Some people feel broke with a few thousand dollars in the bank. Others are okay if the bills are paid and there's some left over.
Just make sure his heart, spirit, and character are not shattered beyond repair and that the has developed his character in life. If he is broken, he needs to heal before a relationship. It's not about money, but about your relationship with money, how you value yourself, and where your faith lies (in your back account, your IRA, your closet?)
Personally, if he trusts God, it will make it easier for me to trust and to follow him, if we're talking marriage. (personally, I don't see the point in dating if we're not looking at marriage as a possibility anyway).
Was looking for this comment! Thank you! I agree!
Thank you for helping me understand what he has been saying and displaying
Uh oh...this video exposing dem broke dusties . They gone be mad you're hitting their lil weak game😂
As a woman, I do the same. I can only give you half of me and not full of that account is dry.
Finance planners will tell you that you need to have in your savings 3 to 6 months of your monthly expenses saved up/stashed away at all times. Ain't nobody going to be funny and telling jokes if his or finances are in the toilet.
Well. If. Shes. A. Good. Woman. And. Been. In. Relationship. With. That. Man. She. There. To. Help .that. What. A. Good. Woman. Would. Do. She. Will. Stock. By. Her. Man. Until. Things. Get. Better.
If I had this logic I wouldn't be married with 5 beautiful kids. She was my push
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽❤👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Beautiful
I'm a woman & feel this way. Geewiz
Women as well! Had a man disregard this she's! Had to leave 3X’s
I have experienced this. It's so true!!!!!!
Damn My Brother, Excellently Said, That’s Big Big Bug Facts!!! I’ve Experienced it🤷🏽♂️
Facts