I love that in your interviews, you are so compassionate and really try to understand where the other person is coming from. The world could use more people like you.
This video is perfect timing for me. I'm 18 and whenever i tell someone i'm transitioning they ask when i'm starting hormones. and i tell them i want to learn myself more because throughout my life i've been living as my parents want me to, i don't know fully who I am and want to discover that and be sure before I start hormones and turn my life around completely. It's nice to relate.
I can relate to Austin in a sense that It was always a Struggle to see myself as a man pre-t, all I could see was a prepubescent boy. But since starting t, I feel like my body is catching up to where I am in life as an adult. T has allowed me to feel connected to my adult self and be confident in expressing myself as such, whereas before I was just always this insecure child in a way.
Aw, I am so jealous! Wish I were hanging out with you two! This journey is so interesting, and while the specifics may be different for each individual, discovering our authentic selves, to me, is so mind-blowing. It's like "where have I BEEN these last 40 years???" Rock on guys!
Wow! That's wild! 40 years living slightly disconnected from your true self? Is that what you mean? I am endlessly fascinated... the human spirit and the stories of different lives, it's so beautiful to me. It's like hearing about different masterpieces being unveiled!
ClosetTransgender yes SLIGHTLY disconnected, or maybe connected in a slightly different way. Lately I've been giving in to facing my fears and conquering my anxieties about my gender presentation - and I am realizing that it's in MY head, and people really ARE supportive - or more so than I give them credit for. In the 70's and 80's it was MUCH different. Although I thought throughout my childhood that I was a boy, as I matured I realized I wasn't and that I was just Butch! It's too complicated to explain in a YT comment, but I think you get my drift! Rock on CT!
Everything you and TheSLOfox said about pre-transition? Everything I've thought and felt. It's scary awesome to hear my thoughts mirrored by another person and makes me feel better about all my deliberation, stress, and bending under social pressure. It makes me ask myself, "Well what what was all that time thinking about other people and their opinions when I could feel so much better about myself FOR myself?" I've watched several videos from both of you and feel you both cover plenty of issues trans people, more to my interest as transmen, think about and how much time some spend in conflict with themselves and others. It is not an easy decision for many even when they are sure of themselves so thank you for being around.
I absolutely adore the supportive nature of your conversation. This may sound weird...but I think the Trans community may save our World. Diverse, supportive, strong, insightful, good humor, self-aware and courageous... My community. Thank You.
This is a beautiful sentiment! I would open it up and say that in a general sense: listening, accepting, being understanding of differences, this practice, in various communities truly does inspire hope for peace. Let's see what we can do! Watch out world! We are coming to save you!
Thanks! I like that feeling. You know, I've felt more accepted and supported by trans people than I ever felt with non-trans people. I feel like I've found my community! It's awesome.
incredibly insightful conversation. You guys should be on radio or tv. You make us all reflect on our journeys and becoming our whole selves. Thank you :-)
Thank you, I always imagine the more we learn about others, the more we grow & understand! Plus when we compare stories with people we also learn about ourselves. I'm always sad when people are closed off, it's like putting yourself into a cage.
This video was really amazing. I have watched both your channel as well as SLOfox for some time now and i always know that what I'm about to watch is insightful and deep. Its great to hear both of your experiences and how everyone goes through different paths to reach the same goals. I wish SLOfox all the best during the journey if and when it occurs.
It is wonderful, this exchange of thoughtful minds (that includes your mind watching and commenting thoughtfully). It was so much fun meeting SLOfox and thinking about things... knowing that others can benefit from hearing these conversations inspires me to continue sharing and exploring. Thank you!
Just want to say that despite all your past doubts about whether T would help or not, you make a very handsome man :D And I can relate very much to your friend too. The reason it took me forever to even seriously contemplate T was also because my self-discovery/gender journey didn't exactly resemble the traditional trans stories. I think for me it also had a lot to do with internal guilt... guilt that I wasn't 'supposed to feel' this way. It took me a long while to realize I was sick of just secretly wishing life would end so I can be a boy in Heaven, and realize that there are options for me on this earth, even if those options are not perfect or my ideal. And omg, it's nice to know I'm not the only one who felt like a boy but not quite a 'man', nice to know that it's possible to 'grow into' that identity later. I mean it makes sense that it would take time because we haven't had the kind of adolescence & socialization that leads up to a sense of 'manhood,' so we kind of have to mature on our own... And haha, I feel you about the whole sex thing. lol I can barely even remember the very few times I did anything with my gf with my shirt off... which was only like in the start of my relationship, before I began to realize how uncomfortable it was to see my body that way. I wanted her to make me feel like a boy, not like a lesbian girl. Thankfully she's very supportive, about T and top surgery, and I'm so grateful for that. ^_^
great video! I know how it is to know for years and be hesitant to start hormones. I have known since I was 18(thanks to youtube, Skylar was the first guy I came across) and I continue to have "aha" moments. I'm now 24 and still not really out yet, but I am getting there. One day I will be on T and embracing life to the fullest; I just have some hurdles to get through first. I appreciate your videos very much. Great insight into different perspectives/journeys.
Yes, there are different hurtles from everyone and it's interesting to compare notes. I like that you wrote this comment with a little glimpse into your own story. That's the nice thing about sharing, it inspires other people to share, I like that!
I can really relate to Austin with not really being aware of that identity and it being in the dark. I felt that way with my sexual orientation. It was sort of always a part of me, I wasn't in denial about it but I didn't really acknowledge it until I started to go for it. I also never had an identity until I discovered the proper labeling (I'm pansexual, but lean towards queer more). I also believe sex could be gendered (I guess there is no other way to say it). I'm sorta genderqueer, but accept my female body and pronouns but sometimes I like the masculinity within sexual interactions. I feel totally different when I'm with a masculine person (and more often than not, I date people who are always being sir'd and don't even identify with being a dude), and my femininity comes out. Great interview! You're really a good interviewer.
This is a great conversation, I do want to hear about the variety of experiences and this opens the door for that. Different discoveries happen at different times and each individual has the fun of discovering more about themselves throughout life. If you think about it, it's really amazing to think that our very own being is filled with surprises!
This sounds EXACTLY like what I am going through right now. I never had that "I am a boy" thought when I was young and it's really confusing. I'd love to watch more of his videos and even speak with him if possible! :)
I included the link to his channel and his videos in my video summary-- and wow does he have a lot of his slow and steady videos that chronicle his coming to this place he is now. He's got an analytical mind and his videos are filled with great questions and insight. You are in for a treat, because it really does feel good to find accounts that resonates with your own, it feels like the world makes more sense, and definitely less lonely! Thanks for your comment, and let me know if my link doesn't work or you are having any trouble finding his videos.
ClosetTransgender I've watched a few of his videos already! I also love your videos. It's great to see different people and their ways of life and dealing with things. And also, gotta give you props on the badass soul patch. :)
Cool! Looks like you guys are having fun. What Forest had to say about transitioning hormonally and changing how he treated his body really resonated with me. Of course everyone's transition is different, but I began a similar trend as well when I started medically transiting. That is I really started to value my body, not just on a superficial level but also in terms of eating well, exercising and finally addressing a long history of substance abuse issues. Austin, I look forward to seeing how testosterone works for you (if thats what you decide to do). It may seem frustrating and slow at first, but give it a year or two and you'll realize that it is quite effective!
yeah, it's a powerful change when you can see yourself, life gets more real. I love this thoughtful comment and-- the nice thing about transitioning is it finally allows you to move forward, instead of cycling in the daily battle of being misunderstood, invisible, etc...
Ah gotta love when you find just the video with the insight you need. I totally relate to his experience as well as I'm sure he will see that many do. I don't have a typical trans narrative I guess you can say.. but when you find yourself that's exactly the time that is meant for you. I too have been thinking about the fact that I am probably trans for about 8 years now! And only in this past year have I felt sure I want to take action on it in the near future. It's a scary thing for a few reasons but I think the "ah-ha" moment has been for me that even though I may not have enough dysphoria to make me want to no longer live or something, it is bad enough and permeates into my every day life enough that I can no longer ignore it. And I love myself too much to have to just "get over" or "ignore" those kinds of feelings. I used to feel like I wasn't fully worthy of calling myself transgender because of the above statements or because of my doubts. But I realized that "I don't feel bad enough to want to give up" being the only thing stopping me from taking T is a disservice to myself and no longer enough for me. I realized I deserve to be seen and see myself as what makes me feel whole, and that's as a guy.
This thought is articulated well. We fall into this trap sometimes, before making any changes-- the daily frustrations of being trans can come across sounding minor. Little complaints like: I wish my muscles were bigger, or I don't like the sound of my voice-- if you hear that by itself it sounds like no big deal, tons of people "wish they had bigger muscles" but when you're trans it isn't just about yearning for features-- it's the entire identity that is the problem. When what you are is completely unnoticed, when you look at ahead at spending a life that feels untrue and uncomfortable -- then you know it is a problem that needs to be addressed!
Yes, yes, yes! Thank you for this video! So good and nuanced. This gender stuff is hard as !&@&$ sometimes. I also experienced a lack of access to the deepest, truest sense of myself. Years of confusion and denial as I felt "off" and distant from myself and the world around me. It took me many, many iterative steps to come to terms that I am a trans guy with lots of exploring and letting myself feel and giving myself permission to have what my heart so strongly and unmistakably yearned for. The HRT decision is one of the scariest (along with surgery) mainly because there is no knowing the outcome or how it'll integrate with your being. Even if we really want it, it's a huge leap into the unknown. I can appreciate why so many folks wait and go around in circles. But I can totally relate to what you said, Forest, that the pain/stress of not going T was ultimately too great. You guys rock!
Thanks for sharing your thoughts! It's really valuable to hear that you can relate! That makes me feel pretty validated. I agree that the HRT decision is scary--you articulated that well.
Something that I don't hear in this video is that you can "be a man" without being on T. T does not= man. I think it's really important to not equate being a man with being on hormones. It was refreshing to hear a story that does not involve "the typical trans narrative".
I love that in your interviews, you are so compassionate and really try to understand where the other person is coming from. The world could use more people like you.
I agree!
A meeting of two great minds! Thank you for the insights.
This video is perfect timing for me. I'm 18 and whenever i tell someone i'm transitioning they ask when i'm starting hormones. and i tell them i want to learn myself more because throughout my life i've been living as my parents want me to, i don't know fully who I am and want to discover that and be sure before I start hormones and turn my life around completely. It's nice to relate.
I can relate to Austin in a sense that It was always a Struggle to see myself as a man pre-t, all I could see was a prepubescent boy. But since starting t, I feel like my body is catching up to where I am in life as an adult. T has allowed me to feel connected to my adult self and be confident in expressing myself as such, whereas before I was just always this insecure child in a way.
As I said on Austin's page, two of the most thoughtful youtubers together. How awesome is that! :)
Aw, I am so jealous! Wish I were hanging out with you two! This journey is so interesting, and while the specifics may be different for each individual, discovering our authentic selves, to me, is so mind-blowing. It's like "where have I BEEN these last 40 years???" Rock on guys!
Wow! That's wild! 40 years living slightly disconnected from your true self? Is that what you mean? I am endlessly fascinated... the human spirit and the stories of different lives, it's so beautiful to me. It's like hearing about different masterpieces being unveiled!
ClosetTransgender yes SLIGHTLY disconnected, or maybe connected in a slightly different way. Lately I've been giving in to facing my fears and conquering my anxieties about my gender presentation - and I am realizing that it's in MY head, and people really ARE supportive - or more so than I give them credit for. In the 70's and 80's it was MUCH different. Although I thought throughout my childhood that I was a boy, as I matured I realized I wasn't and that I was just Butch! It's too complicated to explain in a YT comment, but I think you get my drift! Rock on CT!
Everything you and TheSLOfox said about pre-transition? Everything I've thought and felt. It's scary awesome to hear my thoughts mirrored by another person and makes me feel better about all my deliberation, stress, and bending under social pressure. It makes me ask myself, "Well what what was all that time thinking about other people and their opinions when I could feel so much better about myself FOR myself?"
I've watched several videos from both of you and feel you both cover plenty of issues trans people, more to my interest as transmen, think about and how much time some spend in conflict with themselves and others. It is not an easy decision for many even when they are sure of themselves so thank you for being around.
I absolutely adore the supportive nature of your conversation. This may sound weird...but I think the Trans community may save our World. Diverse, supportive, strong, insightful, good humor, self-aware and courageous... My community. Thank You.
This is a beautiful sentiment! I would open it up and say that in a general sense: listening, accepting, being understanding of differences, this practice, in various communities truly does inspire hope for peace. Let's see what we can do! Watch out world! We are coming to save you!
Thanks! I like that feeling. You know, I've felt more accepted and supported by trans people than I ever felt with non-trans people. I feel like I've found my community! It's awesome.
I'm starting HRT very soon
You two! Together! Yes!
Dream come true.
Yeah, it was awesome and insight-provoking! :)
incredibly insightful conversation. You guys should be on radio or tv. You make us all reflect on our journeys and becoming our whole selves. Thank you :-)
attlee2010 I would honestly love that, I would love to have a radio program. Someday soon. Thank you for writing this, it made me feel really good.
I've been watching vids of you two for ages... I nearly fangirled my brains out watching you two together. :)
I've been following slow fox for quite sometime and I'm very happy to know Austin has come closer to knowing who he is :) Bravo!
TheSLOfox ^
yay for this collab! you guys are cool
You are cool! Right on!
You both look good!! Brilliant video....much appreciated, Forest
I absolutely love how excited you are by other people's differences, I wish the whole world had your outlook.
Thank you, I always imagine the more we learn about others, the more we grow & understand! Plus when we compare stories with people we also learn about ourselves. I'm always sad when people are closed off, it's like putting yourself into a cage.
ClosetTransgender I agree. Also just wanted to say I look up to you a lot and thanks for all your great videos =)
This video was really amazing. I have watched both your channel as well as SLOfox for some time now and i always know that what I'm about to watch is insightful and deep. Its great to hear both of your experiences and how everyone goes through different paths to reach the same goals. I wish SLOfox all the best during the journey if and when it occurs.
It is wonderful, this exchange of thoughtful minds (that includes your mind watching and commenting thoughtfully). It was so much fun meeting SLOfox and thinking about things... knowing that others can benefit from hearing these conversations inspires me to continue sharing and exploring. Thank you!
Thanks, man! I appreciate that.
Just want to say that despite all your past doubts about whether T would help or not, you make a very handsome man :D And I can relate very much to your friend too. The reason it took me forever to even seriously contemplate T was also because my self-discovery/gender journey didn't exactly resemble the traditional trans stories. I think for me it also had a lot to do with internal guilt... guilt that I wasn't 'supposed to feel' this way. It took me a long while to realize I was sick of just secretly wishing life would end so I can be a boy in Heaven, and realize that there are options for me on this earth, even if those options are not perfect or my ideal.
And omg, it's nice to know I'm not the only one who felt like a boy but not quite a 'man', nice to know that it's possible to 'grow into' that identity later. I mean it makes sense that it would take time because we haven't had the kind of adolescence & socialization that leads up to a sense of 'manhood,' so we kind of have to mature on our own... And haha, I feel you about the whole sex thing. lol I can barely even remember the very few times I did anything with my gf with my shirt off... which was only like in the start of my relationship, before I began to realize how uncomfortable it was to see my body that way. I wanted her to make me feel like a boy, not like a lesbian girl. Thankfully she's very supportive, about T and top surgery, and I'm so grateful for that. ^_^
great video! I know how it is to know for years and be hesitant to start hormones. I have known since I was 18(thanks to youtube, Skylar was the first guy I came across) and I continue to have "aha" moments. I'm now 24 and still not really out yet, but I am getting there. One day I will be on T and embracing life to the fullest; I just have some hurdles to get through first. I appreciate your videos very much. Great insight into different perspectives/journeys.
Yes, there are different hurtles from everyone and it's interesting to compare notes. I like that you wrote this comment with a little glimpse into your own story. That's the nice thing about sharing, it inspires other people to share, I like that!
I can really relate to Austin with not really being aware of that identity and it being in the dark. I felt that way with my sexual orientation. It was sort of always a part of me, I wasn't in denial about it but I didn't really acknowledge it until I started to go for it. I also never had an identity until I discovered the proper labeling (I'm pansexual, but lean towards queer more). I also believe sex could be gendered (I guess there is no other way to say it). I'm sorta genderqueer, but accept my female body and pronouns but sometimes I like the masculinity within sexual interactions. I feel totally different when I'm with a masculine person (and more often than not, I date people who are always being sir'd and don't even identify with being a dude), and my femininity comes out. Great interview! You're really a good interviewer.
This is a great conversation, I do want to hear about the variety of experiences and this opens the door for that. Different discoveries happen at different times and each individual has the fun of discovering more about themselves throughout life. If you think about it, it's really amazing to think that our very own being is filled with surprises!
ClosetTransgender How can I get a chance to start a conversation with you! Haha you seem like a cool guy to know.
This sounds EXACTLY like what I am going through right now. I never had that "I am a boy" thought when I was young and it's really confusing. I'd love to watch more of his videos and even speak with him if possible! :)
I included the link to his channel and his videos in my video summary-- and wow does he have a lot of his slow and steady videos that chronicle his coming to this place he is now. He's got an analytical mind and his videos are filled with great questions and insight. You are in for a treat, because it really does feel good to find accounts that resonates with your own, it feels like the world makes more sense, and definitely less lonely! Thanks for your comment, and let me know if my link doesn't work or you are having any trouble finding his videos.
ClosetTransgender I've watched a few of his videos already! I also love your videos. It's great to see different people and their ways of life and dealing with things. And also, gotta give you props on the badass soul patch. :)
Caeden King
Thanks! Yeah, I love Forest's soul patch too! :)
It appears we are watching the same videos Chase Benjamin
Ohh ohh you guys meet!? Sweet!!! Thank you for the video!!! you 2 are my heroes!
Isn't it great! I had such a wonderful time. I learned a lot and look forward to more.
Thanks! Yeah, it was so cool meeting Forest!
TheSLOfox I'm glad you guys got to hang together. Fine interview Forest.
Cool! Looks like you guys are having fun. What Forest had to say about transitioning hormonally and changing how he treated his body really resonated with me. Of course everyone's transition is different, but I began a similar trend as well when I started medically transiting. That is I really started to value my body, not just on a superficial level but also in terms of eating well, exercising and finally addressing a long history of substance abuse issues. Austin, I look forward to seeing how testosterone works for you (if thats what you decide to do). It may seem frustrating and slow at first, but give it a year or two and you'll realize that it is quite effective!
yeah, it's a powerful change when you can see yourself, life gets more real. I love this thoughtful comment and-- the nice thing about transitioning is it finally allows you to move forward, instead of cycling in the daily battle of being misunderstood, invisible, etc...
Hey, thanks! :) I've been meaning to write you!
Brilliant! And we all took time to get to ourselves.
It's true.
When will you two do a video?
Thanks! Nicely put.
Great video, thank you both for sharing!
You guys both look awesome!!
Ah gotta love when you find just the video with the insight you need. I totally relate to his experience as well as I'm sure he will see that many do. I don't have a typical trans narrative I guess you can say.. but when you find yourself that's exactly the time that is meant for you. I too have been thinking about the fact that I am probably trans for about 8 years now! And only in this past year have I felt sure I want to take action on it in the near future. It's a scary thing for a few reasons but I think the "ah-ha" moment has been for me that even though I may not have enough dysphoria to make me want to no longer live or something, it is bad enough and permeates into my every day life enough that I can no longer ignore it. And I love myself too much to have to just "get over" or "ignore" those kinds of feelings. I used to feel like I wasn't fully worthy of calling myself transgender because of the above statements or because of my doubts. But I realized that "I don't feel bad enough to want to give up" being the only thing stopping me from taking T is a disservice to myself and no longer enough for me. I realized I deserve to be seen and see myself as what makes me feel whole, and that's as a guy.
This thought is articulated well. We fall into this trap sometimes, before making any changes-- the daily frustrations of being trans can come across sounding minor. Little complaints like: I wish my muscles were bigger, or I don't like the sound of my voice-- if you hear that by itself it sounds like no big deal, tons of people "wish they had bigger muscles" but when you're trans it isn't just about yearning for features-- it's the entire identity that is the problem. When what you are is completely unnoticed, when you look at ahead at spending a life that feels untrue and uncomfortable -- then you know it is a problem that needs to be addressed!
That's inspiring! Thanks. I really like your comment at the end about deserving to be seen as what makes you feel whole.
Haha, this is probably the most adorable interview you've done.
Yes, yes, yes! Thank you for this video! So good and nuanced. This gender stuff is hard as !&@&$ sometimes. I also experienced a lack of access to the deepest, truest sense of myself. Years of confusion and denial as I felt "off" and distant from myself and the world around me. It took me many, many iterative steps to come to terms that I am a trans guy with lots of exploring and letting myself feel and giving myself permission to have what my heart so strongly and unmistakably yearned for. The HRT decision is one of the scariest (along with surgery) mainly because there is no knowing the outcome or how it'll integrate with your being. Even if we really want it, it's a huge leap into the unknown. I can appreciate why so many folks wait and go around in circles. But I can totally relate to what you said, Forest, that the pain/stress of not going T was ultimately too great. You guys rock!
Thanks for sharing your thoughts! It's really valuable to hear that you can relate! That makes me feel pretty validated. I agree that the HRT decision is scary--you articulated that well.
As usual I love your videos. Great insights you two =]
You guys are awesomely great
Jane Johnson thank you so much!!!
I like TheSLOfox's mouth too!!! Lots of expression there!
Awesome video!
Something that I don't hear in this video is that you can "be a man" without being on T. T does not= man. I think it's really important to not equate being a man with being on hormones. It was refreshing to hear a story that does not involve "the typical trans narrative".
that was awesome.....!
slo is good.
I like his mouth too. Good to know it's not just me.
You look so much like Eddie Vedder from Pearl Jam
HELLLLLL YEAHHHHHHHHHH>
There so mocho man randy savage
oh I thought you stayed off T :( oh well your body.