1. moderate volume 2. tailored appearance 3. good manners, etiquette, and respect for others 4. good eye contact 5. remember names 6. take an interest in others and listen carefully 7. pause before speaking 8. positive attitude 9. not long-winded 10. know when not to speak
I think classy people don't dramatize and repeat the same subject again and again so that they keep the attention to themselves. They speak with facts and in a structured and consistent way.
A subject I love, thank you. Another i would like to hear is what does a classy person do when facing either a person endlessly talking or one that violates polite boundaries asking a question.
I started life out as an Army brat in the mid 1950's and mostly raised in the South. Before leaving the house growing up we always had THAT TALK. You know the one. This helped me to learn how to behave, etc. In the Army I learned how to deal with people from different walks of life. As an over-the-road driver it came in handy. A few places even offered me jobs or because of the way I dress thought I was a vendor. I've also been in stores and had people mistake me for someone who worked there. I mostly wear Dickies, which are way more comfortable than blue jeans, with my shirt tucked in. I was taught when you enter a room and someone is already there you greet them. From my experience I don't think it is taught in our northern states and some plains states. Don't get me started...
These are great tips! We should all strive to be Classy! Classy people do not jump to defend themselves, they are able to consider any criticism in an objective manner as they are humbly looking to improve themselves. An example of looking out for the interests of others; a classy person will notice when someone drops something and will move to pick it up for them, but in a way that is subtle as to not embarrass that person or draw attention to themselves.
Great topic. Two things those traits all exemplify one who walks with humility, meakness, and integrity. Also the contrast of one who is power hungry, or “A” type, so such an interesting topic. I see a book title: When Does Classy End? Also, you look great man 😎.
Hi Alex, As always, your videos are very helpful. This one came in at a great time for me. I've been thinking of and building up my personal communication style. Now I'm ready to say that it'll be classy with a playful twist. Thank you, and I'm looking forward to seeing you on Zoom tomorrow evening!
Excellent tips! I needed these last week when I was on a business trip that involved daytime seminars and nighttime dinner mixers. Definitely need to improve on all of these. Thank you!
I found the tip with the pause very helpful. Unfortunately, I always fall into people's words, because I can not wait until they are finished. But I'll definitely try that with the break!
I think you've nicely covered the gamut of verbal and some-non verbal communication do's and don'ts. I remember some body language expert relating that about ninety percent of the time, our bodies tell others more about us than what we do verbally. So demeanor is very important in human interaction. I'm a new subscriber and just love your show. I really tried to avoid too much eye contact when watching your show....
It may have more to do with being a genuine and balanced person than "Classy." But then again, the authentic and sincere, balanced non judgmental listener is in a class of their own! No matter their "class."
I always thought being classy growing up was similar to a James Bond movie because he had a quick witted sence of humor .Janes Bond always appeared sophisticated and quit witted in a time of danger. Still a gentleman with good manners " Kalif🌅
Classy people are humble, they don't talk about themselves only. I know you said that they take time to get to know the other person but you can tell when someone is genuine about it, not working at it. They really show they're interest and I think it's because they don't rush, don't get distracted by others or their surroundings. Maybe add that classy people are not distracted! They keep their focus on what's in front of them: the person they are speaking to, the conversation, and that's a huge difference in what people are doing now. Distraction by phones, peoplem other bright and shiny things that make the other person feel insignificant or like they don't matter. We all need to work on that focus and presense.
Hi, Thank you for sharing these tips! This video is helpful and encouraging. I definitely should work on eye contact (staring slightly too long at the person I am speaking to).
Hi, thank you for your candid presentation. You have that X factor that makes for a great example- performed rather than spoken - even though you speak throughout .What I've just is actually funny. How can you express so much in non-talking. 😂
Fantastic topic!! Appreciate this so much, it helps to reconfirm my own opinions of others and values I hold for myself! I would Love for you to dig deeper in how to master some of these points!❤🙏🏽🙌
@@alexanderlyon You mentioned the volume of your voice while speaking, inside voice… I have a friend who is sweet, so bright and well traveled, a professional but the volume of her voice is too loud and tho I have gotten use to it my husband has not nor my other friends, how do I politely say something to her??
💐 Thank you for all the helpful pearls of wisdom 💎 really appreciate all your knowledge 🌹just wish had this kind of content when was growing up.. really did not have a voice bless you ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Alex, Thanks for sharing all of these tips in your video and in your accompanying article! I would say, in answering one of your questions, at the end of your video, #1, #5, #7, #8, #9, and #10 are key areas I need to improve upon. In response to another question you asked, I think one tip that could be added to the list might be "Asking Questions for Clarification". Warmly, Sanjay
"Classy is not about income...it's about how they act." Tip 2: Classy people have a tailored appearance...recent haircut...local tailor...high quality materials...
All of these definitely take practise and discipline, although it seems to come more easily for some than others. As a verbal processor and an extrovert, I used to be much more of a "motormouth" than I am now, but sometimes I still fall into the old habits. It's challenging because I can literally FEEL my energy increasing as I sort things out and share information. One thing I try to ask myself, is this: "Am I serving myself or the conversation/relationship right now?" Is the higher value to add adequate info to the Shared Pool of Meaning, or to push my opinions and views? Is it to listen? Once that's determined (and the correct answer is consistent), it's easier to have the right motivation to cool my jets.
Classy people recognize and appreciate diverse communication styles to foster understanding and inclusivity. For example, when encountering a person who is talking about themselves, they don't immediately attribute bad intentions to that person. By remaining curious, said classy person learns that the other person is trying to connect by talking about themselves as an invite for said classy person to then share about themself. Not all cultures communicate in the same way. I ask you a question, you ask me a question is a very white American neurotypical way of communicating. Classy people realize other people are classy too in their own way.
@alexanderlyon Alex, the pausing before speaking is an interesting point. What is your mental model around situations where the other person keeps talking, or there are 2 other people who wont leave any gap for the 3rd person to speak. How is the best way to use the pause? Or is it that the mental model is to speak only when there is a gap and until then just listen and understand?
It's an interesting question but it sounds so specific and situational that I'm not sure I would be able to provide any useful guidance on that in the abstract. When I'm in a tricky or complex situation with multiple communicators, I mainly focus on making sure each person in the group has the opportunity to be heard and be included. It doesn't always look pretty but the goal itself will help guide the conversation there.
Yes, I've seen it. I doubt I'll do a reaction to it, though. Most of it has been combed over pretty well already. It's a VERY interesting moment, though. I'm not surprised you suggested it.
I am friends with a very smart lady who has a master's degree in education. She's also been a school principle for many years. The one thing that I cannot get over in her speech pattern is speaks in a sing song type of voice. To me it is so annoying. As a principal, I would think that she would be a lot more straightforward and measured. For example when she says hi, it's more like "hiyeee!" It comes off as immature.
Free download on the Top 5 Communication Skills Professionals should have: www.alexanderlyon.com/free-resources
1. moderate volume
2. tailored appearance
3. good manners, etiquette, and respect for others
4. good eye contact
5. remember names
6. take an interest in others and listen carefully
7. pause before speaking
8. positive attitude
9. not long-winded
10. know when not to speak
I think classy people don't dramatize and repeat the same subject again and again so that they keep the attention to themselves. They speak with facts and in a structured and consistent way.
Good one!
Classy people talk slow. There's no rushing them. I definitely agree with all.
A subject I love, thank you.
Another i would like to hear is what does a classy person do when facing either a person endlessly talking or one that violates polite boundaries asking a question.
I started life out as an Army brat in the mid 1950's and mostly raised in the South. Before leaving the house growing up we always had THAT TALK. You know the one. This helped me to learn how to behave, etc. In the Army I learned how to deal with people from different walks of life. As an over-the-road driver it came in handy. A few places even offered me jobs or because of the way I dress thought I was a vendor. I've also been in stores and had people mistake me for someone who worked there. I mostly wear Dickies, which are way more comfortable than blue jeans, with my shirt tucked in.
I was taught when you enter a room and someone is already there you greet them. From my experience I don't think it is taught in our northern states and some plains states. Don't get me started...
I grew up in the south and now live in the north and I agree with this.
I aspire to live by these traits. I do fail and have lots more to practice. Very motivating and encouraging video - thank you!
Props to you for that
I would add choice of words, no superlatives or (unnecessary) swear words.
Good video.
These are great tips! We should all strive to be Classy!
Classy people do not jump to defend themselves, they are able to consider any criticism in an objective manner as they are humbly looking to improve themselves.
An example of looking out for the interests of others; a classy person will notice when someone drops something and will move to pick it up for them, but in a way that is subtle as to not embarrass that person or draw attention to themselves.
Classy people don’t brag or try to impress you.
They brag politely. Otherwise, how will they win a client's trust?
I'm going through your series to prepare for a pageant. I want to do well during the judges interview. Thanks for this series! God bless you.
Great video! Also, class people don’t try to make themselves seem more impressive by name dropping, exaggerating, boasting accomplish, etc.
Great point!
Classy people respect other’s opinions and different perspectives 👍🏻
Great topic. Two things those traits all exemplify one who walks with humility, meakness, and integrity. Also the contrast of one who is power hungry, or “A” type, so such an interesting topic. I see a book title: When Does Classy End? Also, you look great man 😎.
Thank you, brother. And still adding subs I see!!!
MODERATE VOLUME, GOT IT 💥
El mejor canal para aprender comunicación interpersonal. Saludos desde Ecuador.
Love love love
One of the best simple yet substantial videos on youtube❤️❤️
Keep doing these brilliant videos
Hi Alex,
As always, your videos are very helpful. This one came in at a great time for me. I've been thinking of and building up my personal communication style. Now I'm ready to say that it'll be classy with a playful twist. Thank you, and I'm looking forward to seeing you on Zoom tomorrow evening!
Thank you so much Mr. Lyon.
That was very helpful 😮
Excellent tips! I needed these last week when I was on a business trip that involved daytime seminars and nighttime dinner mixers. Definitely need to improve on all of these. Thank you!
Love your classy look 😊
Thanks!
I found the tip with the pause very helpful. Unfortunately, I always fall into people's words, because I can not wait until they are finished. But I'll definitely try that with the break!
I think you've nicely covered the gamut of verbal and some-non verbal communication do's and don'ts. I remember some body language expert relating that about ninety percent of the time, our bodies tell others more about us than what we do verbally. So demeanor is very important in human interaction. I'm a new subscriber and just love your show. I really tried to avoid too much eye contact when watching your show....
😂
It may have more to do with being a genuine and balanced person than "Classy." But then again, the authentic and sincere, balanced non judgmental listener is in a class of their own! No matter their "class."
Hi, Alex and I love this so much and english as second language. It helps me a lot to socialise better in Western country.
Great observations. Thank you and God bless you.
Just found you on RUclips this afternoon and am enjoying your communication tips!
Thanks a lot Sir.
These are extremely helpful tips.
I always thought being classy growing up was similar to a James Bond movie because he had a quick witted sence of humor .Janes Bond always appeared sophisticated and quit witted in a time of danger. Still a gentleman with good manners " Kalif🌅
Classy people are humble, they don't talk about themselves only. I know you said that they take time to get to know the other person but you can tell when someone is genuine about it, not working at it. They really show they're interest and I think it's because they don't rush, don't get distracted by others or their surroundings. Maybe add that classy people are not distracted! They keep their focus on what's in front of them: the person they are speaking to, the conversation, and that's a huge difference in what people are doing now. Distraction by phones, peoplem other bright and shiny things that make the other person feel insignificant or like they don't matter. We all need to work on that focus and presense.
Great additions!
Best wishes from Brazil 🏖️🌈🌻🌼🍄🌳🌴🪴🌿🐊🐍🦎🦚
Best wishes from New York state.
I love a matchy outfit. I'm trying to bring it back ❤
Thanks Alex, God Bless you, I've learned a lot from you.
Great tips once again, also very clearly communicated!
Self-respect 🙌
Love this topic Alex, and your bow-tie!
Thanks, Kara. I'm trying to keep it classy! Ha. Truth be told, I rented that tuxedo. Don't tell anybody! ;-)
@@alexanderlyon now that's dedication 😁
Thank you! ♥
I can work on at least 6 of those. Thank you for your content, It's challenging me to look within as I'm working on myself.
Thank you Alex!
You’re welcome!
Thank you sir
Loved this.
Good and nice to see you once again, Prof!
Hi,
Thank you for sharing these tips! This video is helpful and encouraging. I definitely should work on eye contact (staring slightly too long at the person I am speaking to).
Hi, thank you for your candid presentation. You have that X factor that makes for a great example- performed rather than spoken - even though you speak throughout .What I've just is actually funny. How can you express so much in non-talking. 😂
Fantastic topic!! Appreciate this so much, it helps to reconfirm my own opinions of others and values I hold for myself!
I would
Love for you to dig deeper in how to master some of these points!❤🙏🏽🙌
Good idea. I'll think about some points that might benefit from additional details and examples.
@@alexanderlyon You mentioned the volume of your voice while speaking, inside voice… I have a friend who is sweet, so bright and well traveled, a professional but the volume of her voice is too loud and tho I have gotten use to it my husband has not nor my other friends, how do I politely say something to her??
I usually don't recommend giving advice unless somebody directly asks for it. It's a tough call.
Sir, I'm from Bangladesh. Take a rose of my love🌹
Many thanks.
💐 Thank you for all the helpful pearls of wisdom 💎 really appreciate all your knowledge 🌹just wish had this kind of content when was growing up.. really did not have a voice bless you ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Really good tips, thank you.
Excellent!!
Alex,
Thanks for sharing all of these tips in your video and in your accompanying article!
I would say, in answering one of your questions, at the end of your video, #1, #5, #7, #8, #9, and #10 are key areas I need to improve upon.
In response to another question you asked, I think one tip that could be added to the list might be "Asking Questions for Clarification".
Warmly,
Sanjay
Thank you for sharing, Sanjay.
@@alexanderlyon Alex, You are most welcome. I am excited to watch more videos and to learn more about your online programs.
@@alexanderlyon Anytime!
Loved it! ❤
"Classy is not about income...it's about how they act." Tip 2: Classy people have a tailored appearance...recent haircut...local tailor...high quality materials...
You are the best ❤
Thank you.
Looking smart!
I live by these traits only but sometimes its difficult to deal with disrespectful people.
Good points! I feel like I reach classic level people close.
All of these definitely take practise and discipline, although it seems to come more easily for some than others.
As a verbal processor and an extrovert, I used to be much more of a "motormouth" than I am now, but sometimes I still fall into the old habits.
It's challenging because I can literally FEEL my energy increasing as I sort things out and share information.
One thing I try to ask myself, is this: "Am I serving myself or the conversation/relationship right now?"
Is the higher value to add adequate info to the Shared Pool of Meaning, or to push my opinions and views? Is it to listen?
Once that's determined (and the correct answer is consistent), it's easier to have the right motivation to cool my jets.
This was so great! Thank you! New subscriber here! Love your channel!
Nice to know 🎉
GREAT VIDEO! GREAT CONTENT!
Classy people recognize and appreciate diverse communication styles to foster understanding and inclusivity.
For example, when encountering a person who is talking about themselves, they don't immediately attribute bad intentions to that person. By remaining curious, said classy person learns that the other person is trying to connect by talking about themselves as an invite for said classy person to then share about themself.
Not all cultures communicate in the same way. I ask you a question, you ask me a question is a very white American neurotypical way of communicating. Classy people realize other people are classy too in their own way.
A firm but appropriate hand shake and this includes women
Yes!
Great video ❤
Hi, can you analyse whistleblower David Grusch's Interview about UFO disclosure? Thanks
@alexanderlyon Alex, the pausing before speaking is an interesting point. What is your mental model around situations where the other person keeps talking, or there are 2 other people who wont leave any gap for the 3rd person to speak. How is the best way to use the pause? Or is it that the mental model is to speak only when there is a gap and until then just listen and understand?
It's an interesting question but it sounds so specific and situational that I'm not sure I would be able to provide any useful guidance on that in the abstract. When I'm in a tricky or complex situation with multiple communicators, I mainly focus on making sure each person in the group has the opportunity to be heard and be included. It doesn't always look pretty but the goal itself will help guide the conversation there.
Okey
So true . 👍
I would absolutely love to hear your opinion on the recent exchange between Krystal ball and Robert F Kennedy jr… it was a juicy one.
I 99.9% stay out of politics on my channel. It's just not my passion.
Wow this is so good!! Do you know your myers briggs type? I think you are an ISFJ.
Last time I checked, I was an ENTJ! So, you got the J correct.
@@alexanderlyon that’s awesome I’m an INTJ we are similar in behavior I read . I know many ENTJs
Hi Alexander. Did you watch the video of Robert Downey Jr with Krishnan Guru-Murthy?
Yes, I've seen it. I doubt I'll do a reaction to it, though. Most of it has been combed over pretty well already. It's a VERY interesting moment, though. I'm not surprised you suggested it.
What about the saying "when money speaks, everybody keeps silent"
11. Respect boundaries and privacy
12. Good cultural awareness
13. Punctual and reliable
It's kind of classy when someone asks questions in order to make his or her point from other people's answers.
A rare breed.
You have to wear that for every video now!
Ha! I must admit, it was a rental.
@@alexanderlyon haha
They don’t look at their phone (unless there’s an extenuating circumstance) when they’re talking to you.
I'm like 10 p.m. No class.
Oh! That's a funny line.
@@alexanderlyon hey thanks
I am friends with a very smart lady who has a master's degree in education. She's also been a school principle for many years. The one thing that I cannot get over in her speech pattern is speaks in a sing song type of voice. To me it is so annoying. As a principal, I would think that she would be a lot more straightforward and measured. For example when she says hi, it's more like "hiyeee!" It comes off as immature.
Yes, I agree. The sing-songy voice doesn't sound settled and mature. It sounds performative.
Non of the president candidates are classy
Great video 👍 . How many % people are considered classy😅
That would be a great research question. What % number would you estimate?
@@alexanderlyon it depends what circles you are in?
Better than Slassy loll
You have nice hands.
Thank you