The thing to remember is you are meeting people you do not know. I just look at it philosophically. If that person is in hindsight not attracted to me better to let me know right away than drag it on knowing it probably isn't going anywhere.
I am starting to disgust people again. I saw the shining on her eyes when she looked at me, there was absolutely a chemistry. But she rejected me for a second date. I cannot understand the logic behind acting, if you don't like just give some clue...
happened to me also awhile back. I racked my brain trying to figure out what happened but he had his own things he needed to deal with 1st. had nothing to do with what I did or didn't do on the date. he later admitted that, and at that point the ball was in my court if I wanted to go on a 2nd date down the road.. at that point, I did not. great advice Susan ❤
They are probably dating multiple people and he is focusing his efforts on someone he connected better with. But yes, it has nothing to do with u. Some guys like to keep options open too so they act their best regardless. It's unfortunate that some people aren't more direct.
Some people want to show you their best, even if they don't feel like you are a good fit for them. You may have a great first date, but it doesn't mean they want to have something bigger with you. So even after a great first date, they stop. You would probably been happier if they just been rude and didn't have you feeling something great! But it is what it is!
@@SusanWinter I think the best way is not to have any expectations, while knowing what you want. You probably can ask the person at the end of the date, if they had a good time like you did, and ask if they would like to date more, to get to know one another more? This way you atleast get a vibe of the person and put him/her on the spot.... What do you think?
@@veronicav1779 Interesting, you think it would be too difficult for you to tell the person you liked the person, but dont think you would be suitable for them?
Susan this is so profound! I know from my personal experience there’s been times I wasn’t fully emotionally available (I was getting over someone else, etc) and might have disappointed my dates. I’ve also been on the receiving end of this behavior as well. Thank you Susan for enlightening us, and showing people that it’s not always personal 💐
Appreciate the video but honestly it’s ridiculous that adults 25+ are not dating without the intention of a possible relationship. Either take it serious or don’t waste people’s time. It’s absolutely infuriating
Agree with all you've said Susan & another point I'd throw in the mix is that 'you went out with a "people pleaser" '. They seemed so pleasant & friendly, ticked all your boxes, & even agreed with all you said, but they have no intention of seeing you again. For them it was a nice night out & that is ALL! 💖💖👍👍🇬🇧 🇬🇧
Sometimes, as a people pleaser, I'm not actually having a good time but she still feels this way for the reasons you mentioned. However, they do nothing to spark interest from me so there won't be further dates.
This has to be the most accurate video I’ve ever watched. I literally just went through this yesterday. He probably hates the person that I am. Maybe I wasn’t good enough.
Do not ever allow how someone else treats you to define your worth or value, your worth and value start with you and is inherent. That’s like saying if someone is abused by someone else it’s because they aren’t good enough. Giving someone else the power to decide your worth creates an excuse for them to control you and convince you that you are less than all in an attempt to lower your self esteem. Once someone can convince you that they can determine your worth, they can justify poor and abusive treatment 🙏🏽 you are more than enough
In my case, I go to dates just to practice my social skills. Most of the time I don't know if I will continue the interaction with the person but I show them a good time on our first date regardless of how much I like them.
We are all a little awkward at throwing ourselves at a stranger pondering being together and actually spending quality time together both parties aren't not gonna necessarily have all the "perfect" things to say. We can always improve ... sadly, we need to accept ourselves in the moment not reject ourselves.
Totally off-topic, but related. I was ghosted by a guy after a great text date 😅 I mean we texted for 10 hrs straight and then nothing. He didn't even reply my messages for a week and I ended up blocking him. Fun fact : after a few days he found me from his another account and we connected again. He had some family issues going on and his phone was with cops. Point is, you never know what's going on in someone's life. And a lot of times, people don't have the energy to contact and explain everything. So sit back and relax, if it's meant to be, they will find you !
Thank you Susan. This is really insightful. I am new to dating older women and I really had no idea how to go about it until you. I was doing everything wrong
Even if it was amazing I'd still assume he is spinning other plates and juggling other women and wouldn't take anything too seriously. I'd always always have something way more exciting to look forward to than the date and a relationship. That helps to take everything with a pinch of salt. They're just an accessory/add on.
I went on a first date. It felt neutral… but I felt like he wasn’t attracted to me. Today is the next day. He didn’t text. We are 45 years old. Why not just have the decency to say I’m not interested. The ghosting is dumb.
If they don't show up on your 2nd date or 3rd date, or ghost you or even not interested anymore that means they just playing games with your emotions, if they decided to date you then he/she should have tell you what there Feelings about the situation, not ghost, otherwise it's a waste of time and effort. if not interested to begin with then the date should not happen to begin with, only date if they actually decided to be in a relationship,
I went on a date with somebody i know for a year. Went on a date and all the sudden he did cut me off. Not even telling me. No, i had to ask for it. He went from happy after the date to a slap in my face.
Thank you!!! This came just after I went on second date. We got along amazing but he cant fit a relationship into his single dad life he hasn't dated in 2 1/2yrs.... so disappointed 😞 God will send i guess when he chooses im ready💜🙏🧘♀️
I'll turn 50 years old on 18th of this month and I've not seen or heard of the lady that might want to date a person like me so if I'm not found her in 50 years chances are I will never find her the only ladies I see out there if you don't have nothing they don't want nothing to do with you but if you have something they'll have something to do with you I would love to know what it felt like to love and be loved
Before the covid,, have you been to socialising, or talking to people at hobbies and events,,,gets youreself up in fashion style, have humour women love men with humour, no joke I'm serious,, ok your 50, it's a lot harder yes,,, however, here some advice mate, style, humour, hobby, confidence,, these are your keys, now only you can use these key to open the door to your relationship,, ps I'm currently helping a man that is also in the exact same situation,, he is 42,,
How the heck can you get a mad French kiss on the 1st date and then a simple text "no thank you" from the woman when you offer a second date?! We were even sneaking around her work office like teenagers after hours, finding a vase for her to put the flowers that I gave her.
Tbh i always display this type of behaviour. The reason is, i am naturally positive and laid back person regardless of the person i’m seeing. If the energy matches then wow we might be vibing but i won’t commit. No matter how good it feels the time we spent together, I don’t think i will be willing to commit.
He is dating because he wants to find a woman for life. We went on 2 dates. Kissed on the 2nd date, last night. Today no txt. Maybe I am too impatient but it would have been nice to receive a little caring today from him
@@kispumel because I am not looking just for a male but for a gentleman . I like gentlemen and I don't want to be the gentlemen of the couple since I am a woman 😉
@@Skeijeindi exactly. I bet he is a gentlemen and will get back to you in reasonable timeframe. My point was different. If you are being "impatient" thats not a big deal, and if you just want to hear about him beforehand just reach out. Which is anyway feminine energy so you doing nothing wrong.
@kispumel ok but this was not last night. I am not impatient. So I waited and he wrote me after 2 weeks. I know what I know immediately. I am very sensitive so I knew this was bad..it is not impatience , it is instinct. 2 weeks is not gentleman he is a bullshitter. Ps. Reaching out is not feminine energy in this early stages. It is ridicoulous and desperate
As always, great video Susan. It might be anything, everything, one thing or nothing. Some men link women’s behavior to future, some men like to measure their ability to be compatible with the woman they are dating. It also might be that the guy just didn’t like you, or you might did something that triggered their future effort. He might also like to play games but you showed him that he can’t mess with you! It can be anything. Just move on and don’t think about it. After he gets dumped, you will find him texting you about your great date. Be yourself and enjoy your life
OMGGSH MS.SuSaN. Thank you soooo much. You have the best videos….( I have been squeezing my brain,watching tons of videos,However this video was the one that reallly answerd all my questions. Thank you soo much 💕🙍🏽♀️🙍🏽♀️🙏🏾… IAm a new subscriber
I went on a date yesterday but I was nervous and I have a pimple on my face he messaged me but he messaged me a good amount of hours later he said he fell asleep but I just feel he's distant and quiet
Could you please make a video about how to get our crush like us and go on a date with them. How to find out if they are interested. Someone told me that when men have crush on somebody they go after it and if they don't chase you, it's obvious that they don't like you. Is it right?
I went on a first date with a guy a couple months ago and the date itself was fine, conversation flowed, we had a ton in common but i didnt FEEL anything. And for me, that “spark” feeling is everything. I either feel it or I dont. So even though the date was good. I didnt keep in touch with him afterwards cause I knew it wasnt for me. He kept asking me out afterwards and I politely declined. He may have “felt” something that I didnt. It sucks that it can go one way sometimes but it’s nothing he did. Just my perspective from someone who had a good first date but never kept in touch!
Right? This video blames the guy for the date not working out because he was dating for other reasons. No, alotnof the times the other person fails to spark interest.
The feeling that you didn't get might come on the second or tenth date so you are doing yourself and them a disservice by rejecting them if you have say similar values and a similar view of the future. When you strike a match does it always light first time ?
@@johnballard6725 Does not matter in this context. She is looking an initial high attraction and high sexual chemistry to begin with. Could it "worked upwards" out on the 5th/9th/10th date? Yes. She is just not looking for that, its that simple. Her choice.
where can I meet older women during Covid? Online dating does not work for me, I never had any luck. I am great at conversation with older woman but these masks don’t help. I have dated a few older women in the past. And I met them in person but I strike a conversation. Any suggestions as far as where/ how to meet them? Also, it’s tough to go up to them now because you don’t want to potentially spread germs so unfortunately everybody is physically staying away from each other which does not help.
I hear what ur saying but if these are the reasons, that said person shouldn't even be dating because all that does is waste people's time. That's just my opinion and one of the main reasons why I hate dating...too many people either dating for the wrong reasons or have no clue in what they want
J - pursued me and wooed me for a first date. Asked me right away what I'm looking for, would I try skiing and where would I like to be 'whisked away' to. No text or call since! D - took me out for a very expensive lunch, seemed nervous and tried to impress me with his expensive watch, gold card and fancy car. Named dropped - he worked with George Clooney, Michelle Obama and Prince Harry. At the end of the date he asked me would I like to do this again and I said yes.Then, nothing. No text or call!
Sounds like a jerk. The ones who name drop are the worst. I just wanna roll my eyes. I was talking with one on the weekend. He told me he was 2nd cousins with a famous hockey player. My take is woopy doo da. As the conversation progrest his true colors came out. He started acting erratic. Mumbling inane jabbering jabber . I cut the conversation short and he says I'm never going to hear from you again am I"?? I thought duh....do you think Captain Obvious! 🤣
All hear is that it is the other person's fault... nothing about being introspective. I've had alot of women say they've had great dates, but I've called it off because all they do is talk, never ask me many questions, and even interject whileni am. They feel connected because they mistske me being present and actively listening as the both of us having a great time. Men usually are less picky and are looking for "less checkmarks" then women, so the vibe or something about her must be really off to not even offer a 2nd date.
The thing to remember is you are meeting people you do not know. I just look at it philosophically. If that person is in hindsight not attracted to me better to let me know right away than drag it on knowing it probably isn't going anywhere.
Excellent way to look at it.
I am starting to disgust people again. I saw the shining on her eyes when she looked at me, there was absolutely a chemistry. But she rejected me for a second date. I cannot understand the logic behind acting, if you don't like just give some clue...
happened to me also awhile back. I racked my brain trying to figure out what happened but he had his own things he needed to deal with 1st. had nothing to do with what I did or didn't do on the date. he later admitted that, and at that point the ball was in my court if I wanted to go on a 2nd date down the road.. at that point, I did not. great advice Susan ❤
Never put a crown on a clown 🤡 and expect a king 👑
~~ Pastor RC Blake’s 🙏🏿🙃
They are probably dating multiple people and he is focusing his efforts on someone he connected better with. But yes, it has nothing to do with u. Some guys like to keep options open too so they act their best regardless. It's unfortunate that some people aren't more direct.
Some people want to show you their best, even if they don't feel like you are a good fit for them.
You may have a great first date, but it doesn't mean they want to have something bigger with you. So even after a great first date, they stop.
You would probably been happier if they just been rude and didn't have you feeling something great! But it is what it is!
True, and those are good points. It's a very difficult bit of business to understand when all went well yet no second date.
@TheVertamin So did you ever do that to someone yourself?
@@deepdiver849 yes I have because I'm a nice person but not interested in going any further :)
'like doggy sniffing at the park' lol
@@SusanWinter I think the best way is not to have any expectations, while knowing what you want. You probably can ask the person at the end of the date, if they had a good time like you did, and ask if they would like to date more, to get to know one another more? This way you atleast get a vibe of the person and put him/her on the spot....
What do you think?
@@veronicav1779 Interesting, you think it would be too difficult for you to tell the person you liked the person, but dont think you would be suitable for them?
Susan this is so profound! I know from my personal experience there’s been times I wasn’t fully emotionally available (I was getting over someone else, etc) and might have disappointed my dates. I’ve also been on the receiving end of this behavior as well.
Thank you Susan for enlightening us, and showing people that it’s not always personal 💐
Just experienced this. Great date. Pointed out some differences to discuss and no answer from then on.
Appreciate the video but honestly it’s ridiculous that adults 25+ are not dating without the intention of a possible relationship. Either take it serious or don’t waste people’s time. It’s absolutely infuriating
Thank you so much Susan! I had so much anxiety after getting short responses from him the day after our date. You’ve cleared up a lot for me.
Agree with all you've said Susan & another point I'd throw in the mix is that 'you went out with a "people pleaser" '. They seemed so pleasant & friendly, ticked all your boxes, & even agreed with all you said, but they have no intention of seeing you again. For them it was a nice night out & that is ALL! 💖💖👍👍🇬🇧 🇬🇧
Sometimes, as a people pleaser, I'm not actually having a good time but she still feels this way for the reasons you mentioned. However, they do nothing to spark interest from me so there won't be further dates.
You look gorgeous. Love you, Susan!
I love you too
Well spoken, it recently happened to me too. Feels good to know it's not your problem, but there's. We move on to meet new people in life.
This has to be the most accurate video I’ve ever watched. I literally just went through this yesterday. He probably hates the person that I am. Maybe I wasn’t good enough.
It hurts I know.
Do not ever allow how someone else treats you to define your worth or value, your worth and value start with you and is inherent. That’s like saying if someone is abused by someone else it’s because they aren’t good enough. Giving someone else the power to decide your worth creates an excuse for them to control you and convince you that you are less than all in an attempt to lower your self esteem. Once someone can convince you that they can determine your worth, they can justify poor and abusive treatment 🙏🏽 you are more than enough
In my case, I go to dates just to practice my social skills. Most of the time I don't know if I will continue the interaction with the person but I show them a good time on our first date regardless of how much I like them.
New camera... awesome!
thank you for your wisdom, you beautiful lady, just needed it after an amazing date going nowhere 🙂
We are all a little awkward at throwing ourselves at a stranger pondering being together and actually spending quality time together both parties aren't not gonna necessarily have all the "perfect" things to say. We can always improve ... sadly, we need to accept ourselves in the moment not reject ourselves.
Totally off-topic, but related. I was ghosted by a guy after a great text date 😅 I mean we texted for 10 hrs straight and then nothing. He didn't even reply my messages for a week and I ended up blocking him. Fun fact : after a few days he found me from his another account and we connected again. He had some family issues going on and his phone was with cops. Point is, you never know what's going on in someone's life. And a lot of times, people don't have the energy to contact and explain everything. So sit back and relax, if it's meant to be, they will find you !
Sorry but "family issue" is literally what they all say.
One guy made up a story about his kid getting leukaemia. What a creep!! 🤮
Very unusual, this hardly ever happens
Then unblock him then
@@msdemeanourhe’s got mental issues
Thank you Susan. This is really insightful. I am new to dating older women and I really had no idea how to go about it until you. I was doing everything wrong
Best video on this topic! Thank you❤
Even if it was amazing I'd still assume he is spinning other plates and juggling other women and wouldn't take anything too seriously. I'd always always have something way more exciting to look forward to than the date and a relationship. That helps to take everything with a pinch of salt. They're just an accessory/add on.
That's a good way of viewing things
Good advice!!! Thank you! ❤
I went on a first date. It felt neutral… but I felt like he wasn’t attracted to me. Today is the next day. He didn’t text. We are 45 years old. Why not just have the decency to say I’m not interested. The ghosting is dumb.
If they don't show up on your 2nd date or 3rd date, or ghost you or even not interested anymore that means they just playing games with your emotions, if they decided to date you then he/she should have tell you what there Feelings about the situation, not ghost, otherwise it's a waste of time and effort. if not interested to begin with then the date should not happen to begin with, only date if they actually decided to be in a relationship,
I just want to say than you Christopher, I wake up now.. It happen to me a few days ago.
It's from experience as we get older, especially if they do this constantly then we understand how relationships work overtime
I went on a date with somebody i know for a year. Went on a date and all the sudden he did cut me off. Not even telling me. No, i had to ask for it. He went from happy after the date to a slap in my face.
Thank you!!! This came just after I went on second date. We got along amazing but he cant fit a relationship into his single dad life he hasn't dated in 2 1/2yrs.... so disappointed 😞 God will send i guess when he chooses im ready💜🙏🧘♀️
Sometimes it’s all about the timing
👍👏👌 Thank you for sharing Miss Susan.
This video was exactly what I needed to hear! Thank you Susan.
Don't obsess too much. Your date might really get you but theyre not in the right place to have a relationship just now.
I'll turn 50 years old on 18th of this month and I've not seen or heard of the lady that might want to date a person like me so if I'm not found her in 50 years chances are I will never find her the only ladies I see out there if you don't have nothing they don't want nothing to do with you but if you have something they'll have something to do with you I would love to know what it felt like to love and be loved
Before the covid,, have you been to socialising, or talking to people at hobbies and events,,,gets youreself up in fashion style, have humour women love men with humour, no joke I'm serious,, ok your 50, it's a lot harder yes,,, however, here some advice mate, style, humour, hobby, confidence,, these are your keys, now only you can use these key to open the door to your relationship,, ps I'm currently helping a man that is also in the exact same situation,, he is 42,,
How the heck can you get a mad French kiss on the 1st date and then a simple text "no thank you" from the woman when you offer a second date?! We were even sneaking around her work office like teenagers after hours, finding a vase for her to put the flowers that I gave her.
May God bless you and your family
Thank you, I needed to hear this. I appreciate you and the message helped.
What a crazy video. 😮
Tbh i always display this type of behaviour. The reason is, i am naturally positive and laid back person regardless of the person i’m seeing. If the energy matches then wow we might be vibing but i won’t commit. No matter how good it feels the time we spent together, I don’t think i will be willing to commit.
Gross
Sounds like a fear of commitment. Maybe you can learn about your attachment style 🙏🏽
@@leahislar4911 it might be a good idea actually…
Well, happens. I think he suddenly got scared. His immaturity got the better of him.
Needed this
He is dating because he wants to find a woman for life. We went on 2 dates. Kissed on the 2nd date, last night. Today no txt. Maybe I am too impatient but it would have been nice to receive a little caring today from him
You also have a phone. Why not just reach out to him if you think about him?
@@kispumel because I am not looking just for a male but for a gentleman . I like gentlemen and I don't want to be the gentlemen of the couple since I am a woman 😉
@@Skeijeindi exactly. I bet he is a gentlemen and will get back to you in reasonable timeframe. My point was different. If you are being "impatient" thats not a big deal, and if you just want to hear about him beforehand just reach out. Which is anyway feminine energy so you doing nothing wrong.
@kispumel ok but this was not last night. I am not impatient. So I waited and he wrote me after 2 weeks. I know what I know immediately. I am very sensitive so I knew this was bad..it is not impatience , it is instinct. 2 weeks is not gentleman he is a bullshitter. Ps. Reaching out is not feminine energy in this early stages. It is ridicoulous and desperate
Great video Susan 😊😊
As always, great video Susan. It might be anything, everything, one thing or nothing. Some men link women’s behavior to future, some men like to measure their ability to be compatible with the woman they are dating. It also might be that the guy just didn’t like you, or you might did something that triggered their future effort. He might also like to play games but you showed him that he can’t mess with you! It can be anything. Just move on and don’t think about it. After he gets dumped, you will find him texting you about your great date. Be yourself and enjoy your life
My first date when amazing. We kept in contact even planned a second date and the day off he canceled and never heard from him.
Well said ❤
You are looking even more beautiful :)
Thanks Deep
I met someone offline this week, and things seemed to go well, and he told me to text him when i got home and I did. But he didn’t reply.
Has he replied yet??
@@FollowingJesus17 No but it’s all good. I’m not really dwelling on him anymore.
OMGGSH MS.SuSaN. Thank you soooo much. You have the best videos….( I have been squeezing my brain,watching tons of videos,However this video was the one that reallly answerd all my questions. Thank you soo much 💕🙍🏽♀️🙍🏽♀️🙏🏾… IAm a new subscriber
I had a great 2nd date. Bith dates were great. And we talked abd chatted. Now, ghosted. Im baffled
Hello from NYC. Looking good girl
I went on a date yesterday but I was nervous and I have a pimple on my face he messaged me but he messaged me a good amount of hours later he said he fell asleep but I just feel he's distant and quiet
Could you please make a video about how to get our crush like us and go on a date with them. How to find out if they are interested. Someone told me that when men have crush on somebody they go after it and if they don't chase you, it's obvious that they don't like you. Is it right?
Thank you🙏🙏
I went on a first date with a guy a couple months ago and the date itself was fine, conversation flowed, we had a ton in common but i didnt FEEL anything. And for me, that “spark” feeling is everything. I either feel it or I dont. So even though the date was good. I didnt keep in touch with him afterwards cause I knew it wasnt for me. He kept asking me out afterwards and I politely declined. He may have “felt” something that I didnt. It sucks that it can go one way sometimes but it’s nothing he did. Just my perspective from someone who had a good first date but never kept in touch!
Right? This video blames the guy for the date not working out because he was dating for other reasons. No, alotnof the times the other person fails to spark interest.
The feeling that you didn't get might come on the second or tenth date so you are doing yourself and them a disservice by rejecting them if you have say similar values and a similar view of the future. When you strike a match does it always light first time ?
@@johnballard6725 Does not matter in this context. She is looking an initial high attraction and high sexual chemistry to begin with. Could it "worked upwards" out on the 5th/9th/10th date? Yes. She is just not looking for that, its that simple. Her choice.
When covid is over I will start dating again. I feel starved 😅
where can I meet older women during Covid? Online dating does not work for me, I never had any luck. I am great at conversation with older woman but these masks don’t help. I have dated a few older women in the past. And I met them in person but I strike a conversation. Any suggestions as far as where/ how to meet them?
Also, it’s tough to go up to them now because you don’t want to potentially spread germs so unfortunately everybody is physically staying away from each other which does not help.
Seems like the date is people pleasing and mirroring .... not necessarily being themselves in their mind.
Totally been what iffing myself cuz he was so into me
I hear what ur saying but if these are the reasons, that said person shouldn't even be dating because all that does is waste people's time. That's just my opinion and one of the main reasons why I hate dating...too many people either dating for the wrong reasons or have no clue in what they want
J - pursued me and wooed me for a first date. Asked me right away what I'm looking for, would I try skiing and where would I like to be 'whisked away' to. No text or call since!
D - took me out for a very expensive lunch, seemed nervous and tried to impress me with his expensive watch, gold card and fancy car. Named dropped - he worked with George Clooney, Michelle Obama and Prince Harry. At the end of the date he asked me would I like to do this again and I said yes.Then, nothing. No text or call!
Sounds like a jerk. The ones who name drop are the worst. I just wanna roll my eyes. I was talking with one on the weekend. He told me he was 2nd cousins with a famous hockey player. My take is woopy doo da. As the conversation progrest his true colors came out. He started acting erratic. Mumbling inane jabbering jabber . I cut the conversation short and he says I'm never going to hear from you again am I"?? I thought duh....do you think Captain Obvious! 🤣
We can never know a strangers motives or what’s behind their contrary behavior. It is frustrating.
Can you do a video on friendly flirting
❤️
Hi, can you tell me what to do when your girl earns x5 more than you. Its weird situation for me.
You came up g don't leave her
Too many people 😂
In sorry but this video was bad. The whole thing was “i don’t know”
lol canton ohio!!!!!
All hear is that it is the other person's fault... nothing about being introspective. I've had alot of women say they've had great dates, but I've called it off because all they do is talk, never ask me many questions, and even interject whileni am. They feel connected because they mistske me being present and actively listening as the both of us having a great time. Men usually are less picky and are looking for "less checkmarks" then women, so the vibe or something about her must be really off to not even offer a 2nd date.
Does anyone know if her dog Nika is full pomeranian or a mix? I really like that cute dog
At least I got a free meal because if not it was a waste of my time. Just say’n.
Men are turned off by the western feminist movement.
Susan, women will go on dates for a Klondike Bar. Real men wont waste their time doing this.
Dating is a waste unless you go dutch. Better yet, take that money you spend on dating chicks and invest instead.