Get the free book: www.signshelikesyou.com/ Hope you liked the video! If you have any questions, comments or anything you want to share, let me know here! 😘
A New Mode great advice thank you!! How about how to implement some of this advice during this pandemic. Where were all still at home and have many limited options for communication. Thank you
I wish that you could do a whole video on boundaries. The concept feels so foreign to me. I’m a Pisces so we lack that lol.... perhaps some more examples on some reasonable boundaries that can be set beyond respecting my time. A good title would be “top 5 boundaries that guys respect and desire” something like that 🤷🏾♀️
I agree with you that works to win a guy but I can't do all this hard work to make him pursue me the whole life I want a spontaneous relationship where I can just be me.
During 12 years of marriage, we still have those boundaries. In different certain ways, of course. I have my own world and my husband has his. It makes us respect each other. All of your advice does make sense, Sabrina... 😘
This is so helpful being I just picked up a relationship from the past and he has taken me for granted. I need to focus more on myself and be more confident in the fact that I am worth pursuing.
Oh my gosh, this video struck a chord with me! Within a couple of weeks, I shared stories about how compassionate, thoughtful and smart I am. Also had to throw in that I was a former dancer, cheerleader, and sorority girl, as if that would impress him. Will someone please smack me upside my head? 😂😂😂
Hi there! I followed your channel SO MUCH when I was dating again after divorce. I'm seeing a high-quality guy - about a year now - but your advice was so helpful in navigating the emotions and insecurities while dating again. He LOVES when I am decisive and speak my mind. It was odd to me at first - I felt that repulsion to appearing "needy," but I am amazed at how he responds to me. It's almost like a superpower that I can use that benefits both of us. He feels assured knowing what's on my mind, and I get to have a say in our relationship, what we do, how our lives coordinate. It's honestly so freeing and still surprising to me. He also has his say and we have to compromise, but we do it together. Set things up that way from the beginning - where you have a seat at the table of your relationship - you're absolutely right.
I have learned these important points you have given in this video through psychotherapy and through watching repeated behaviors in myself and men. You get to the point where you have to be selfish because if you don't you will get taken advantage of. That even applies to friendships and work.
What's surprised me most in this vid and I don't know why because it's obvious really is the giving too much of yourself too early on and making him more important and forgetting all about my own needs, that's something I tend to do each time, thanks for the warm advice x
Omg! I have done many of those wrong in many levels in my last relationship. Giving so much to someone who didn't appreciate it. Guess I gotta work on myself again...
Sabrina! Your most valuable video of all! At least for me. You are just BANG on! I just realized at 60 how many things I did wrong. Hopefully other younger girls will find out earlier thanks to you. Self love yes... that’s it.... will avoid a lot of suffering, believe me... I’ve been there🥰
At 65, if I may, I just wish to inject some true optimism. Just around the corner ( let’s say 2-5 years) we will have REAL , and free technologies to heal ALL physical aliments , diseases , genetic malformations etc. With that, comes REAL age reversal options. NOT kidding, and yes this will be free. Not pulling your leg, So much opportunity ahead for you to use your knowledge
Guys do NOT like girls who are easy! My mom told me this when I was a teenager!! This is so true!! Men like the chase.. I don’t know why Women don’t get this!
@@Sagefrakrobatik That’s because you are used to Women who don’t respect themselves enough to make you wait, so you know that there are easier Women out there. If they were all like that you would have no choice but to wait..
@@viviancaulkins5858 we made out a few times she said we can get a room but everytime she would find a reason not too. so it wasn't as if she wasn't physical lying attracted to me
This video is amazing! I am creating happiness on my own “still” while I’m dating a guy and taking it slow now. “It’s bringing happiness into the relationship”
Great video! Ive already applied 4 out of 5 several years now. Havent always been like that though, its something I had to learn the hard way. The 5th however is harder for me. Im kind of over sharing, haha!
Very interested u specks the truth for some of us women I'm one of them ..thanks much I learned before listening to u, but u made me stronger .. Blessing
Omg this spoke to me. I’m learning to do the whole boundary thing and I did communicate what I expect... communication. However I don’t have many friends so it’s hard to enjoy being single, I’ve been single for more than a decade I’m a bubbly fun person and I love my friends at work. So my days off and evenings I’m completely free. But I’m working on boundaries as I said,
What if our confidence means we don't even care if he hasn't kissed or show us to his friends. We could actually wait as well, when he feels he is completely ready and if it doesn't turn out like that, we can always walk away.
This is about the best advice I ever heard! The message here is just.SLOW.down...and let things happen naturally. No rush. I heard an old song from way back where the chorus line was: We'll make ALL the STOPS. Why not take it slow and have fun getting to know one another? That's a big part of the fun of romance.
Thank you for this video- EXCELLENT points!! Can you please do a video on how to deal with dating someone with an emotional detachment love style? Just asking. ❤️❤️😍😍💯💯
The point is...they don't put an effort anyways sometimes. I did all this. I was busy and not clingy - they just did the same and dissapear. I set boundaries - they either fight or think you are arrogant. People became cold and they are scared of emotions.
Haha I actually had this conversation yesterday. I knew this guy is busy but his communication was getting worse, sometimes didn't respond to me and so I sent him a text that if he really wanted to meet me he should communicate more often and put me in his schedule, because our city is full of guys who don't want to put any effort in dating, but valuable woman like me just doesn't need that. At first he was like, oh I did not know you thought we were so far and maybe we should give it a hiatus. So I responded, that it was not about commitment, but about respecting myself and having some basic expectations from a person I spend time with, but I agree with hiatus because I need some time without him in my life. Guess what? He responded immediately that meanwhile he will work on timemanagement to be able to meet me more. Trust me girls, I was nervous as hell but I succesfully showed him I have my own life and my boundaries 💪 (And yes I didn't act, I really felt it that way)
I have done this with my husband and he used to took davantage of me. Since 3 years i put myself first and have boundaries and he suddently loves me more and take good Care of me and the kids. Now i get it
Agree so much also with the wanting to be the laid back girlfriend, afraid he'll think I'm a demanding diva if I'm not happy with something, I always try to be nice, OMG I'm so sick if being nice i actually resent it.. Thanks for the tips x
Love your videos! Best advice then another other relationship RUclipsr. I’m 54 and I’m in a relationship now. Followed your advice. My life is full. My problem is that I’m always creating future scenarios in my head about us all the time. For example. Creating the scenario about when he tells me he loves me. And how I will react. Also another scenario is him wanting to meet my family and my kids and how it’s going to be. Another scenario is him inviting me to see his friends and so on. So I can create all these scenarios in my head when I’m worried about is that I will be disappointed. Like I set up all these expectations in my brain and then when it happens it doesn’t happen the way I thought. I am doing my best to block those scenarios out of my brain. When it happens and I try to think of something else but I don’t think it’s working. Any suggestions?
How about you give your mind something else to do? Like, instead of fantasizing about what MAY happen, and leaving yourself open to disappointment and possibly resenting him for not living up to the fantasy, you start noticing how compatible you really are with him. Does it seem like HE's escalating the relationship at all, or are you thinking of all of these scenarios BECAUSE he's not taking these steps on his own? I wouldn't focus too much on the actual "I love you" but more on if he's making you feel like you matter, if he's consistent, if he makes you a priority. I don't know how long you've been together, but if he doesn't seem interested in meeting your kids now, what if that doesn't change? Are you ok with that? Try to focus on the NOW, not what you wish would happen later. I wish you luck in your relationship
As a guy watching this, it's frustrating because coaches for men share similar things for us. Dating is tough, guy or girl. I shared too much of how I felt too soon and freaked my girl out, now kicking myself daily. Gave myself too freely and put her on a pedestal. She walked away to a guy who doesn't treat her well. Good video though.
Yes, it can seem a bit of a paradox when you see this messaging from coaches for men and for women. The answer-behind-the-answer is: - have a vision for your LIFE that you are more passionate about than getting a girl/guy or one particular girl/guy. If they're the right fit, they'll fit perfectly and maybe even feed the vision for your life better than you could on your own. - dating is never about chasing on either side. Attraction is a part of it of course, but with that prerequisite satisfied it will only move into a future if there's a shared vision and desire to build that vision together. In other words, there's a bigger picture to all of this. People struggle with dating when they think that dating or finding a mate is a goal in itself. It can't be. Your future partner needs to fit with your personality, your lifestyle and your vision for your future. Men and women who have a life they are passionate about (or joyful towards) don't tend to struggle with dating. They enjoy their life so much as it is, they're not looking for someone else to make them happy. It's actually more like they only want to allow someone in their life if that person enhances the life they already love... if not (or if they're perceived as a possible future "drain"), they actively block that person.
Everyone needs boundaries and standards. Good boundaries and standards are like body armor at war. If you take them off for any reason, you risk the chance for great ingery because the ememy can strike at any minute.
Funny thing is, I am very quiet at work, and there is a co worker who has an interest in me -- yet, I haven't given him a whole lot about me because I haven't had the chance to get to know him off the job. Which, obviously, is a good thing since it gives him room to get to know me over a period of time.
Hey Sabrina, how are you? I am a new subscriber and I really enjoy hearing your advice. As a Christian woman, could I apply these steps while dating, or are there other steps that I should take? I’m really curious about this for when I’m ready to start dating again in the distant future since I’m not interested in dating right now. I’m focusing on me for awhile. 😊💖
Good content as all the video I watched so far...( except music background)...here is a question for you, COVID changed a lot of things recently including dating codes... My boyfriend and I could not even separate or stay away or give each other space during Christmas and new year due to regular during new year in Italy, simply if we wanted to stay together, we must stay in one city ( means your home or my home!) so we did..and when holiday finished we retuned back to our city and again both had space we needed...it changed a little dynamic of our relationship...and on top, I also could not see my other friends so we stay together more!!!don’t say that it killed the chemistry but created problems and left both with doubts...what you suggest for this new era of dating and meeting people???I don’t say we fall off but the fact I feel we both need time to think if we want to be again that long together is disturbing me ;)) it’s just wired!
I'm really interested in both psychology and different sorts of interaction's between people, communication and of course I will want to build a romantic relationship with someone. So I really am interested in general and love discussions and I always want to learn more. To learn something new every day is kind of a drug of mine. So my question is on no. 4 - What if you meat a guy you've already become friends with and you support all your female friends with your Excessive Compassion Disorder (ECD) - and has done so since childhood - why shouldn't you help him out just because he's a male friend? Isn't that kind of hyppocritical - especially if your no 1 priority is to at least keep the guy as your friend. I also really enjoy seeing results of my advise on people on emotional matters (Yes, I've probably chosen the wrong occupation and should have become a psychologist instead), so it would in that type of situation be a really valuable experience either way. So what would you advise on that or what are your thoughts? Is it worth it to risk a great friendship for only a possibilty of a love relationshop by leaving in that type of situation? Maybe I'm just stumbeling upon the answer - that the answer is that - choose what is alligned with your first priority in relationship type of status with the guy? What do you think?
This reminds me of the Netflix show/documentary " Turned On " episode 2 . They follow this 41 year old Tinder addict . In one Monday night moment , he decides to text his new love interest " why don't you come over to my house I'm having a party " . She declines over the totally logical fact that she's working tomorrow- so he texts back " Anyway ...Was nice knowing you . " For guys having problems getting a girfriend, knowing these guys exist ... I pinch myself and realize i'm awake !
Guy there. Came around to brag about manipaltion, watched and confirms. The video could have title "healthy way to date", as these are just non-manipulative mindsets that will work for comfort and health of both sides of new relationship, while keeping the flirt going❤️
9:00 Omg I just got out of a relationship like theat 2 month ago. I stayed bc I get bad and my mom kept pressuring me. I saw a therapist and ended it a month or about 3 and a half months ago. I’m not here for him though. I’m here for this guy I’ve got a crush on rn. We’ve been texting, but I want to know if he’s someone I’m going to be happy with, so I’ve been trying to get to know him better by asking questions and so far he’s a really good guy, but before I make my move (in like a month or 5) I want to make sure because all know how that ended last time (seriously took me almost a year to break up with him then I got back together with him bc I felt bad, then I broke up with him again and blocked him on all socials after he said he wanted to be strangers).
I tried all these things that she said in this video. Made this guy do all the work for a year o so then wen the time came and I finally gave him a chance, he disappeared after like 3weeks
Omg i feel like we would totally be best friends. I’m know as the “beautiful” girl in my world which Is flattering but being a “beautiful” girl all the time Is sooo difficult
Thanks! Great advice, I'm actively dating and this makes so much sense! Would it be considered needy or confident if I ask a guy who I've been on 5 dates with 'why have you dropped making arrangements and reverted to only texting me?'
Reciprocity? Seeing if you are willing to invest into the relationship as well? If the initiative always has to come from one side, that one side will eventually conclude the feelings and interest are not mutual. Things like that don't work out. The "why have you"-question is definitely needy. It imposes everything on him all to your own needs. It's incredibly one-sided. To be brutally honest, even the _idea_ of considering such a question as "confident" is outright weird. If you need someone else, it's not _your_ confidence. It's a huge red flag. I hope you're not into chase-games, especially not the he-should-chase-me-100%-variety. A relationship is something both sides should work on and should work towards. Dating's about seeing if you're dealing with someone you'd want to invite into your life because they make your life better. And that goes for both sides. So if you don't invite anyone into your life, either you don't want them or you have no life. So which invitations have you send?
@@fleetingfootnotes9133 thank you for your reply. Yes I was totally willing to invest and demonstrated that with initiating messages, suggesting dates etc. It did feel needy to ask 'why' so I didn't go down that route. I am certainly not the kind of person to expect to be chased. Anyhow, fast forward 3 months and he is no longer in my life. He stopped replying to my messages and faded away. I am good though; it obviously wasn't meant to be.
Get the free book: www.signshelikesyou.com/
Hope you liked the video! If you have any questions, comments or anything you want to share, let me know here! 😘
A New Mode great advice thank you!! How about how to implement some of this advice during this pandemic. Where were all still at home and have many limited options for communication. Thank you
I wish that you could do a whole video on boundaries. The concept feels so foreign to me. I’m a Pisces so we lack that lol.... perhaps some more examples on some reasonable boundaries that can be set beyond respecting my time. A good title would be “top 5 boundaries that guys respect and desire” something like that 🤷🏾♀️
Sabrina, I am amazed how you keep talking about the girl not giving sexual favors to a guy too easily without EVER using the word "sex" . Why ?
@@dubongros3108 Haha, I do it because sometimes YT can penalize you for using explicit words so I just try to keep it clean :)
@@donnaganlyturk5521 a
1. Be happy on your own.
2. Have boundaries.
3. When you know what you want and you express it.
4. Put yourself first.
5. Leave him wanting more.
Yes i definitely need to work on a few of these....😏😏
Thanks 👍
Thanks for the notes.I have made a screenshot for later on 😅👌😘🇨🇵
Ohhh so... I failed 😅😁😥
These are not "weird" traits 🙌🥰
Boundaries. Boundaries. Boundaries. ... BOUNDARIES.
I agree with you that works to win a guy but I can't do all this hard work to make him pursue me the whole life I want a spontaneous relationship where I can just be me.
I know right? I always wonder why I can't be like "normal" people and just be in a relationship without worrying about it all the time.
Funnily enough when I stop thinking about someone they pop up and call me, or text me 😁
oh noo this is accurate 😂
Oh all the time
You knooow wen u want ditch them n o on living you then booom they recall they since called u n try to hold a convo!!!
Always...and it's the best time because you're usually over them so it's easy to dismiss them and not get sucked back in
Girl, every time. What the heck is that?! Lol
I find it very attractive that my wife is not needy; she trusts me and treats me like a king. (I treat her like a queen as well.) Love your channel.
During 12 years of marriage, we still have those boundaries. In different certain ways, of course. I have my own world and my husband has his. It makes us respect each other. All of your advice does make sense, Sabrina... 😘
“Obsessive Compassion Disorder” …LOVE IT!!!
Excessive she said actually 😂
This is so helpful being I just picked up a relationship from the past and he has taken me for granted. I need to focus more on myself and be more confident in the fact that I am worth pursuing.
Oh my gosh, this video struck a chord with me! Within a couple of weeks, I shared stories about how compassionate, thoughtful and smart I am. Also had to throw in that I was a former dancer, cheerleader, and sorority girl, as if that would impress him. Will someone please smack me upside my head? 😂😂😂
True love takes time,great advice!
Hi there! I followed your channel SO MUCH when I was dating again after divorce. I'm seeing a high-quality guy - about a year now - but your advice was so helpful in navigating the emotions and insecurities while dating again. He LOVES when I am decisive and speak my mind. It was odd to me at first - I felt that repulsion to appearing "needy," but I am amazed at how he responds to me. It's almost like a superpower that I can use that benefits both of us. He feels assured knowing what's on my mind, and I get to have a say in our relationship, what we do, how our lives coordinate. It's honestly so freeing and still surprising to me. He also has his say and we have to compromise, but we do it together. Set things up that way from the beginning - where you have a seat at the table of your relationship - you're absolutely right.
I have learned these important points you have given in this video through psychotherapy and through watching repeated behaviors in myself and men. You get to the point where you have to be selfish because if you don't you will get taken advantage of. That even applies to friendships and work.
This is one of my videos!! I am going to watch this one a few times. I truly need this one. Thank you so much
Glad it was helpful!
Loved it so much - even making notes and analyzing what I could do better.
Thank you for doing such an amazing job with anewmode!
*It's about being unapologetically ourselves and embracing those quirks. Looking forward to implementing these insights and seeing the magic happen!*
What's surprised me most in this vid and I don't know why because it's obvious really is the giving too much of yourself too early on and making him more important and forgetting all about my own needs, that's something I tend to do each time, thanks for the warm advice x
Omg! I have done many of those wrong in many levels in my last relationship. Giving so much to someone who didn't appreciate it. Guess I gotta work on myself again...
Sabrina! Your most valuable video of all!
At least for me. You are just BANG on!
I just realized at 60 how many things I did wrong. Hopefully other younger girls will find out earlier thanks to you. Self love yes... that’s it.... will avoid a lot of suffering, believe me... I’ve been there🥰
At 65, if I may, I just wish to inject some true optimism. Just around the corner ( let’s say 2-5 years) we will have REAL , and free technologies to heal ALL physical aliments , diseases , genetic malformations etc. With that, comes REAL age reversal options. NOT kidding, and yes this will be free. Not pulling your leg, So much opportunity ahead for you to use your knowledge
Guys do NOT like girls who are easy! My mom told me this when I was a teenager!! This is so true!! Men like the chase.. I don’t know why Women don’t get this!
to an extent after a while I will give up
@@Sagefrakrobatik That’s because you are used to Women who don’t respect themselves enough to make you wait, so you know that there are easier Women out there. If they were all like that you would have no choice but to wait..
@@viviancaulkins5858 I dated a woman for two years and she still wouldn't let me come over
@@Sagefrakrobatik You DATED her and she wouldn’t let you come over? You mean to her house? Then it probably wasn’t meant to be with her.
@@viviancaulkins5858 we made out a few times she said we can get a room but everytime she would find a reason not too. so it wasn't as if she wasn't physical lying attracted to me
Your so right I also learnt to focus more on my self than men. I have just joined this channel but I like it
Thank you dear
I am glad that u reminded me that i have to set boundaries for all of these !
Thanks for the video so much helpful ! ⭐🖤
I love what I took away from this , thank you!
I wish I had known this three years ago 😿 thank you, this is very enlightening, you're wonderful ❤️
This video is awesome. Great advice, love it!
This video is amazing! I am creating happiness on my own “still” while I’m dating a guy and taking it slow now. “It’s bringing happiness into the relationship”
Love this Sabrina . You are a godsend . Stay blessed
Your advice is so honest,and so true, much different from other channels. Thanks
I appreciate that!
Great video! Ive already applied 4 out of 5 several years now. Havent always been like that though, its something I had to learn the hard way. The 5th however is harder for me. Im kind of over sharing, haha!
Love this alot. Thanks for sharing
I love your smile, your face, your vibes and what you say. You glow from inside. Best wishes
Very interested u specks the truth for some of us women I'm one of them ..thanks much I learned before listening to u, but u made me stronger ..
Blessing
Watching this one year later, and it's like you are talking to me. Thank you so much
Listening from Rhodes Greece. 🇬🇷💖
I love your video very much .
Thank you for your adivice.
May God bless you and your family.
With love from Malaysia.
Omg this spoke to me. I’m learning to do the whole boundary thing and I did communicate what I expect... communication.
However I don’t have many friends so it’s hard to enjoy being single, I’ve been single for more than a decade
I’m a bubbly fun person and I love my friends at work. So my days off and evenings I’m completely free. But I’m working on boundaries as I said,
What if our confidence means we don't even care if he hasn't kissed or show us to his friends. We could actually wait as well, when he feels he is completely ready and if it doesn't turn out like that, we can always walk away.
Once again, your right on!!
Thank you dear Sabrina. Tus consejos son muy útiles y nutritivos. Es como escuchar a una buena (y sabia) amiga. Amor desde México.
Yes, o love all this information!!! Thank you. ❤️
some of the best advice i have ever heard thanks for sharing
Very important message ❤️
This is about the best advice I ever heard! The message here is just.SLOW.down...and let things happen naturally. No rush. I heard an old song from way back where the chorus line was:
We'll make ALL the STOPS. Why not take it slow and have fun getting to know one another? That's a big part of the fun of romance.
Tell that to so many women I know, forcing things is so gross
Do you remember the name of the song? I’d love to listen to it I’m sure the message will Resonate with me.
Good advice
Thank you sabrina. You spoke my language here. Love it. Keep up the great work !!!!!
Yay! Thank you!
Thank you for this video- EXCELLENT points!! Can you please do a video on how to deal with dating someone with an emotional detachment love style? Just asking. ❤️❤️😍😍💯💯
Thank you for this, babe! 😘😊
This video makes perfect sense..I loved it,🥰❤️👏👌👍
The point is...they don't put an effort anyways sometimes. I did all this. I was busy and not clingy - they just did the same and dissapear. I set boundaries - they either fight or think you are arrogant. People became cold and they are scared of emotions.
then they are a damage case, not a high quality man, and that's not good enough for you. the end.
@@jennifergiannantonio7764 Exactly
You're so beautiful so are you advice so full of inspirations. Thanks so much I learnt alot from this video.
I'm so glad!
This is the best content on you tube. I think you are awesome.
Thank you I love ur videos❤️
Haha I actually had this conversation yesterday. I knew this guy is busy but his communication was getting worse, sometimes didn't respond to me and so I sent him a text that if he really wanted to meet me he should communicate more often and put me in his schedule, because our city is full of guys who don't want to put any effort in dating, but valuable woman like me just doesn't need that. At first he was like, oh I did not know you thought we were so far and maybe we should give it a hiatus. So I responded, that it was not about commitment, but about respecting myself and having some basic expectations from a person I spend time with, but I agree with hiatus because I need some time without him in my life. Guess what? He responded immediately that meanwhile he will work on timemanagement to be able to meet me more. Trust me girls, I was nervous as hell but I succesfully showed him I have my own life and my boundaries 💪 (And yes I didn't act, I really felt it that way)
Great advice as usual 💕
Thanks so much!
Can you make video with advice for women in a long term relationships? When do you start becoming more other focused? How do you maintain a balance?
This is good😊
Thanks a lot for the advice 😘🇨🇵👌
Wonderful
I have done this with my husband and he used to took davantage of me. Since 3 years i put myself first and have boundaries and he suddently loves me more and take good Care of me and the kids. Now i get it
Thanks for the great advice - I agree some boundaries are important and make a woman more desirable 😉
Beautiful
LOVE It !!!!!
Agree so much also with the wanting to be the laid back girlfriend, afraid he'll think I'm a demanding diva if I'm not happy with something, I always try to be nice, OMG I'm so sick if being nice i actually resent it.. Thanks for the tips x
Great video!
Glad you enjoyed it
Interesting!!
Thank you ♥️
Excessive compassion. Yes. 👍
Thanks for educating us. Okay how about when it is a long distance relationship? How I handle that? Thanks again
It's been 5 yrs it was great then he gets better and is now seeing someone else but I can't just let go
Love your videos! Best advice then another other relationship RUclipsr.
I’m 54 and I’m in a relationship now. Followed your advice. My life is full. My problem is that I’m always creating future scenarios in my head about us all the time. For example. Creating the scenario about when he tells me he loves me. And how I will react. Also another scenario is him wanting to meet my family and my kids and how it’s going to be. Another scenario is him inviting me to see his friends and so on. So I can create all these scenarios in my head when I’m worried about is that I will be disappointed. Like I set up all these expectations in my brain and then when it happens it doesn’t happen the way I thought. I am doing my best to block those scenarios out of my brain. When it happens and I try to think of something else but I don’t think it’s working. Any suggestions?
How about you give your mind something else to do? Like, instead of fantasizing about what MAY happen, and leaving yourself open to disappointment and possibly resenting him for not living up to the fantasy, you start noticing how compatible you really are with him. Does it seem like HE's escalating the relationship at all, or are you thinking of all of these scenarios BECAUSE he's not taking these steps on his own? I wouldn't focus too much on the actual "I love you" but more on if he's making you feel like you matter, if he's consistent, if he makes you a priority. I don't know how long you've been together, but if he doesn't seem interested in meeting your kids now, what if that doesn't change? Are you ok with that? Try to focus on the NOW, not what you wish would happen later. I wish you luck in your relationship
Love yourself ❤️
As a guy watching this, it's frustrating because coaches for men share similar things for us. Dating is tough, guy or girl. I shared too much of how I felt too soon and freaked my girl out, now kicking myself daily. Gave myself too freely and put her on a pedestal. She walked away to a guy who doesn't treat her well. Good video though.
Yes, it can seem a bit of a paradox when you see this messaging from coaches for men and for women.
The answer-behind-the-answer is:
- have a vision for your LIFE that you are more passionate about than getting a girl/guy or one particular girl/guy. If they're the right fit, they'll fit perfectly and maybe even feed the vision for your life better than you could on your own.
- dating is never about chasing on either side. Attraction is a part of it of course, but with that prerequisite satisfied it will only move into a future if there's a shared vision and desire to build that vision together.
In other words, there's a bigger picture to all of this. People struggle with dating when they think that dating or finding a mate is a goal in itself. It can't be. Your future partner needs to fit with your personality, your lifestyle and your vision for your future.
Men and women who have a life they are passionate about (or joyful towards) don't tend to struggle with dating. They enjoy their life so much as it is, they're not looking for someone else to make them happy. It's actually more like they only want to allow someone in their life if that person enhances the life they already love... if not (or if they're perceived as a possible future "drain"), they actively block that person.
You learned. You are to make you the prize. Concentrate on you.
I feel so dumb after watch this video 😌 how can I fix my dumbness 🤦🏻♀️
Have some compassion for yourself. If you knew better you’d do better. 😉
You are not dumb. You are learning/growing ☺️
L feel so dump l try it to be my owm
Oh thanks ! I really need this right now . I love your videos 👍👍👍👍👍👍
So glad!
This video was very helpful!! Thanks 😊
Omg. I do not put a boundary to any relationship in the past. I often attract the bad guys to me. Now I understand
Everyone needs boundaries and standards. Good boundaries and standards are like body armor at war. If you take them off for any reason, you risk the chance for great ingery because the ememy can strike at any minute.
Awesome
It made sense and I am sad that I didnt see these videos in year 2009 ... :(
Funny thing is, I am very quiet at work, and there is a co worker who has an interest in me -- yet, I haven't given him a whole lot about me because I haven't had the chance to get to know him off the job. Which, obviously, is a good thing since it gives him room to get to know me over a period of time.
I do all of the mistakes but i want to better myself
Hey Sabrina, how are you? I am a new subscriber and I really enjoy hearing your advice. As a Christian woman, could I apply these steps while dating, or are there other steps that I should take? I’m really curious about this for when I’m ready to start dating again in the distant future since I’m not interested in dating right now. I’m focusing on me for awhile. 😊💖
Good content as all the video I watched so far...( except music background)...here is a question for you, COVID changed a lot of things recently including dating codes...
My boyfriend and I could not even separate or stay away or give each other space during Christmas and new year due to regular during new year in Italy, simply if we wanted to stay together, we must stay in one city ( means your home or my home!) so we did..and when holiday finished we retuned back to our city and again both had space we needed...it changed a little dynamic of our relationship...and on top, I also could not see my other friends so we stay together more!!!don’t say that it killed the chemistry but created problems and left both with doubts...what you suggest for this new era of dating and meeting people???I don’t say we fall off but the fact I feel we both need time to think if we want to be again that long together is disturbing me ;)) it’s just wired!
I'm really interested in both psychology and different sorts of interaction's between people, communication and of course I will want to build a romantic relationship with someone. So I really am interested in general and love discussions and I always want to learn more. To learn something new every day is kind of a drug of mine. So my question is on no. 4 - What if you meat a guy you've already become friends with and you support all your female friends with your Excessive Compassion Disorder (ECD) - and has done so since childhood - why shouldn't you help him out just because he's a male friend? Isn't that kind of hyppocritical - especially if your no 1 priority is to at least keep the guy as your friend. I also really enjoy seeing results of my advise on people on emotional matters (Yes, I've probably chosen the wrong occupation and should have become a psychologist instead), so it would in that type of situation be a really valuable experience either way. So what would you advise on that or what are your thoughts? Is it worth it to risk a great friendship for only a possibilty of a love relationshop by leaving in that type of situation? Maybe I'm just stumbeling upon the answer - that the answer is that - choose what is alligned with your first priority in relationship type of status with the guy? What do you think?
True.
This reminds me of the Netflix show/documentary " Turned On " episode 2 . They follow this 41 year old Tinder addict . In one Monday night moment , he decides to text his new love interest " why don't you come over to my house I'm having a party " . She declines over the totally logical fact that she's working tomorrow- so he texts back " Anyway ...Was nice knowing you . " For guys having problems getting a girfriend, knowing these guys exist ... I pinch myself and realize i'm awake !
True! ❤
This is total genius 🤓
Let him discover you slowly...don't tell but show them who you are.
Thank you for this profound statement.
Interesting
My guy friend said he never wished to fall for you... What does he mean by this, what is he thinking..
Guy there. Came around to brag about manipaltion, watched and confirms. The video could have title "healthy way to date", as these are just non-manipulative mindsets that will work for comfort and health of both sides of new relationship, while keeping the flirt going❤️
Basically, she's saying, "Let him know you have dignity and pride in yourself."
9:00 Omg I just got out of a relationship like theat 2 month ago. I stayed bc I get bad and my mom kept pressuring me. I saw a therapist and ended it a month or about 3 and a half months ago.
I’m not here for him though. I’m here for this guy I’ve got a crush on rn. We’ve been texting, but I want to know if he’s someone I’m going to be happy with, so I’ve been trying to get to know him better by asking questions and so far he’s a really good guy, but before I make my move (in like a month or 5) I want to make sure because all know how that ended last time (seriously took me almost a year to break up with him then I got back together with him bc I felt bad, then I broke up with him again and blocked him on all socials after he said he wanted to be strangers).
Number 4! Compassion disorder you describe my last relationship to a T!
I tried all these things that she said in this video. Made this guy do all the work for a year o so then wen the time came and I finally gave him a chance, he disappeared after like 3weeks
Omg i feel like we would totally be best friends. I’m know as the “beautiful” girl in my world which Is flattering but being a “beautiful” girl all the time Is sooo difficult
Thanks! Great advice, I'm actively dating and this makes so much sense! Would it be considered needy or confident if I ask a guy who I've been on 5 dates with 'why have you dropped making arrangements and reverted to only texting me?'
Reciprocity? Seeing if you are willing to invest into the relationship as well? If the initiative always has to come from one side, that one side will eventually conclude the feelings and interest are not mutual. Things like that don't work out.
The "why have you"-question is definitely needy. It imposes everything on him all to your own needs. It's incredibly one-sided. To be brutally honest, even the _idea_ of considering such a question as "confident" is outright weird. If you need someone else, it's not _your_ confidence. It's a huge red flag.
I hope you're not into chase-games, especially not the he-should-chase-me-100%-variety. A relationship is something both sides should work on and should work towards. Dating's about seeing if you're dealing with someone you'd want to invite into your life because they make your life better. And that goes for both sides. So if you don't invite anyone into your life, either you don't want them or you have no life. So which invitations have you send?
@@fleetingfootnotes9133 thank you for your reply. Yes I was totally willing to invest and demonstrated that with initiating messages, suggesting dates etc. It did feel needy to ask 'why' so I didn't go down that route. I am certainly not the kind of person to expect to be chased. Anyhow, fast forward 3 months and he is no longer in my life. He stopped replying to my messages and faded away. I am good though; it obviously wasn't meant to be.
This is funny. Do not come over and do not expect another go.
Where can i find your full story of getting ur ex back? Please reply ❤️❤️
whats the difference between being needy and express what you want? it seems like overlaps? im confused.