When I was a high school science teacher, my pay was completely used up because of childcare and all the sick leave and missed work days due to ill children. We realized that we would have the same amount of money if I stayed home with our kids. How does this help the community if a science teacher can't afford to work AND have a family?
Someone I used to work with had this realization too. She loved her job and was excited to come back to it after having her baby but realized she was basically paying to work once childcare was taken into account. So she quit and they made due on her husband’s income.
We are in the same situation. Wife left work and we actually have a bit more money. We took that extra cash and now shes taking courses online while our child is back in school. Shes always wanted to do something more but never felt like she had the opportunity.
@@lunarthief6501 I'm so happy that you were able to turn the obstacle into an opportunity. I am so grateful that you are supporting her goals and desires with the family's finances and with your moral support. Congratulations. Thank you for sharing your story and for inspiring me.
@@thesingerintheshower Well given the options this one is easy. The government picks up part of the cost and we take the rest. Once shes done with school our income and taxes will increase so it's a win win. Plus I'm selfish this means we may be able to retire on 30 or 40 years.
I'm a SAHM right now and my husband appreciates me a lot more now that he's been working from home. He didn't realize all that I do every day until he was home. I mean he's still doesn't fully realize all that I do with all the organizational, researching, planning, scheduling, inventory, accounting and other business labor I do running a household and making sure my kids get all they need as far as their education, health and development. But at least as far as the child care and house work part, he has a much better appreciation for that than he used to.
The U.S.A. had a childcare system during WWII when women first entered the workforce en masse. When necessity dictates the economic growth, anything is possible to achieve.
@@blakethegreatone2058 And ther point of your Stalin example is? There are pros and cons, but that should be those parents' decision. In a "free country" women should have the freedom to choose.
Senator Murray describes a childcare/parental leave system that is taken for granted in European countries. I moved to Europe when my babies were small and would talk to other mothers about maternity leave in our respective countries. They reacted with shock when I explained the American system...or lack thereof. I've experienced how basic social care creates a much stronger, more stabile society. Many right-wing Americans call this "socialism" and reject it, but it's the most pro-family way to run a society. Republicans have always called themselves the "family values" party and I can't understand why.
Well not quite. Unfortunately Ireland has exactly the same problem. It's bad that a lot of people can't afford to get on the property ladder. It's even worse that childcare is scarce and costs the same as a month's wage. A lot of adults are having to live at home well into their 30s and starting families are getting later due to social welfare issues
Desi, you did the simplest thing and yet it made a world of difference to me, so much so that I just burst into tears. Thank you for the shout-out to single parents!
In 2019 I was pregnant while I worked as a videographer/ Photographer at a major media company. I kept the entire pregnancy hidden because I knew my job would be taken away. After 7 months I had to undergo an emergency c-section and even then I told my job I was sick. After spending weeks recovering I returned to the workplace fully cleared only to have all my duties given away and was slowly faded out of the company. We need a better work culture.
@Esphaeras Praestans when minorities and women needs are addressed, everyone benefits. Having more women in the workplace would change the culture especially if they are in position of power. Making sure your work is inclusive and you can be your whole self, wether it's a caretaker or another hobby on the side.
When we realized my entire paycheck went to daycare, I quit working. Now I’m done with raising the kids and ‘too old’ to enter the workforce. Really frustrating.
Mother's that stay at home 'manging' the house should get college credits and credit with employers because it is not an easy job, even if it is unpaid.
As a woman in a country full of unfaithful, cheating husbands, I kept working, even though I wasn’t making more than $50 per month after childcare. I researched and knew that taking 4-6 years off during childbearing years would make me seem out of date in my field, hard to get a job later, and impact my ability to retire when I got old. When I was 10 years old, I overheard my mom talking to herself. She was mumbling. “I know I should leave him, but how would I support my kids?” I made a promise to myself that I would ALWAYS be able to support my kids. Of course, this was in the 70s and 80s and there was childcare.
IKR I had these problems 30yrs ago and am still angry about it. When I took my daughter to work I got Can't find a sitter?? When my ex took her to work he got Oh let me help she's so cute!
@@twilfits Yes! Women took the hit during Covid-19, too. Women were expected to stay home, not the men, for the most part, when the kids were remote learning. I firmly believe that most of the reason why we make less money than men is because we birth children. Of all the things in Biden's big 3.5T plan, I think that free preschool and childcare are the two things other than money for the environment, that absolutely need to happen. If these happen parents can afford to pay off college loans and not be in debt for the rest of their lives and maybe even be able to buy a house.
I really enjoy these segments. This one hit home. In the 70s when I had my first child, I let my boss talk me into coming back early from my maternity leave. It made no difference in my career and I still regret it.
I was raised in the 60’s and 70’s my there were 3 of us kids and my mother who was divorced worked full time as a nurse and at night she was a graduate student. They didn’t really have things for kids after school so for a while my mom would pay someone to watch us after school. My mom was a head of her time, when we first moved to the Texas town we were raised in my mother purchased a house for us, on the mortgage paperwork she was referred to as femme sole and 2 weeks after moving in the received notice from the bank that basically we had to vacate another family wanted to buy that house and it had a man in charge of the family. My mom called the realtor who gave her the number of someone a couple blocks down who was eager to sell so she went after it and we moved in. The point to this long story was a femme sole can have the home she purchased for herself and 3 small children taken away because there was nobody saying it wasn’t okay. BTW After my husband died 7 yrs ago I moved and bought a new house for cash on the contract I noticed I am also identified as Femme Sole. I choose to believe it means I have a keen musical insight as well as wisdom beyond years.
💯🙌 When you are barely making enough at your job to cover child care then it doesn't make sense to work. If you can't get child care then you have to work opposite shifts of your spouse but anymore work shifts don't tend to be stable. Even when your children are older finding a job you can do while they are in school is nearly impossible and then what do you do in the summers? Thank you for highlighting this problem, labor shortage is NOT because people are lazy.
@@jackb1969 I am a stay at home mom. My husband drives truck. Financially we can afford for me to stay home. That doesn't mean that I want to! I would love to work somewhere and get out of the house but who would watch my kids.. You are completely missing the point and definitely part of the problem. Completely ignorant statement
Yep. My sister literally put her entire paycheck into daycare. But she had been at the job so long she didn't want to leave and lose all the perks she had accumulated. If you have 2 kids daycare costs more than rent.
And you know something else that I just thought of? Mental health must also be an issue for many moms as well because they have to do this child care balancing with their work so they wouldn't get much time for themselves and so they would get overwhelmed but it also affects their mental health. This is just me thinking about this logically and showing some empathy as a man
America has a social services problem in general. It even probably brings down the men of power who continue to desperately uphold their power. Stronger families and communities only make for stronger economies and progress.
Childcare here in Germany is free in alot of cities. For most cities it is free from 3 years on. More women in the workplace=more taxes for the government= more money for childcare!!! Problem solved and easy.
As a single mom of 3 doing waitress AND bookkeeping work I spent over 1/2 of my income paying baby sitters, lost connection with kids, made at least one bad relocation decision then had to get food assistance, eventually welfare balanced legally by reporting income. They took away all assistance at a certain level of income which was so problematic it became sensible to quit waitressing but retained bookkeeping which also supported baby sitter. They were the toughest BUT MOST REWARDING years of my 70 years.
Thank you for this episode! Childcare is so expensive. This is why I made such a hard decision and left the workforce almost 7 years ago. Between before/after school care for the older ones and daycare for the baby at the time it made more financial sense to stay home.
I stopped to watch one of these several weeks ago, I'm addicted now. All day all the time, just keep it coming. Maybe have Trevor on as a guest and talk about how you all choose which stories get airtime and how much. 💚💚💚 Love you guys.
You can find several interviews of the whole cast/team together and individually being interviewed about these topics..fall asleep watching and at two I the morning g you'll wake up and they're playing. :)
I'm so glad this issue is being addressed. The sacrifice falls on the women a majority of time when it comes to giving up a career or feeling bad about having to put her career on hold because she is balancing family and life.
Working full time with mandatory OT and having a young child or children is extremely hectic. Something most will never understand unless they’ve experienced it themselves.
@@auroraautumn8764 Usually it's the mother that's expected to take time off to care for a sick child or take them places. Not the father. This has an impact on her attendance and her ability to work overtime if needed. If a father is taking care of his child, it's assumed he is babysitting while the mother is doing something else, not that he is providing regular care for his child. People think he deserves a pat on the back for doing things they take for granted when the mother does them. They don't expect the father to stay home with the kids, although that does happen more often now. They don't expect him to leave work to pick up a sick kid from school.
@@auroraautumn8764 it's a societal norm still that the woman stays home while the man works. Obviously this is not true everywhere. I myself am a stay at home dad and I do all the things associated with that. I tell other men what I do and you can tell they think less of me. It's my belief that if we can change the societal norm then you would see alot of men staying home.
As a parent that works from home I felt it in my soul when Roy said that his kid can tell when something important is about to happen so he just says “snacks”.
I have an autistic daughter, who it is almost impossible to find a childcare for her and the one I can find is almost impossible to afford, given the rate of children being diagnosed within the Autism Spectrum in the United States, a lot of parents are being faced with this reality in which one of the parents has to stay home. I still work but the jobs I can have access to are the ones with very low pay rate but have some flexibility. So no professional and economical growth for me.
My daughter works with children who have autism. We talk all of the time about the costs for parents. Basically if you don't have great insurance it is *very* difficult to get the therapy the kids need. My heart goes out to you!
I work for a school age childcare program and we would be better able to serve autistic children if we could have adequate staffing. If we could get more funding to childcare workers, who in my experience really want to do the job and do it well, it would make such a difference for workers and the families served. And if the workers the felt they had respectable pay and benefits there would be more people who want to do the work of raising this country's next generation.
My mom's a single parent and she was struggling to the point where she had to ask my grandmother for help raising both me and my sis. she could have easily rejected but thankfully she did it not to say that she wasn't that involved though because she kept tabs and checked in every so often to see how everything was going while she was trying to sort out her teaching career. So I sort of indirectly appreciative of that shout out.
Childcare employment doesn't pay a living wage, especially nowadays. It's terrible that women are getting forced out of the workforce but there's a problem with the balance of affordable childcare and providing living wage for the childcare workers who enable others to go to work.
We need the wealthy to stop hoarding all the money. All of the economical issues seem to point to the same place, profits are at record highs, upper management salaries are at record highs. Everyone below the top 10% seem to be doing all the work and still struggling . . . it doesn't make sense.
Lol they don't care. They are literally expecting teachers to be subjected to mask-less germ hoarders and not get a livable wage in the US every where. 🤦♀️
It's insulting when services like sitter city advertise $10hr to dress your child and out them on the bus. That's like $20 for a 3hr day...considering committing. $7 hr doesn't pay for your own car..especially part time.
We had a major chain of childcare centers, they had like 7 locations, go bankrupt ahead of the covid-19 pandemic in my county. There hasn't been anything to replace that.
Thank you for having this conversation. I just resigned my position as a NP in women's health clinic for a similar reason. I put in vacation time at the requested time in order to care for my daughter. My supervisor only approve 2 weeks, advising me to find child care for the 3rd week because it would "disrupt the clinic". I was so emotionally stressed I resigned. Because here I was submitting my request on a timely fashion and still I was denied. I resigned because I didn't know how my future would be if something unexpected happened and I couldn't come to work.
I adore Patty, vote for her (& Maria) every cycle, one of the things I admire is her tenacity. She's spent the last 20 yrs fighting for these issues & doesn't give up, she hides her time & then smacks her fellow Senators over the head with them when they think she's let it go.
Thank you for this thoughtful piece! We need more affordable childcare now, and support for working parents overall!! Love that you featured my WA Senator, Patty Murray who's been in office since before I moved here in 1995!
Love the "pathway through my room". As a single parent of three kids, bottom line rules: I have to be at work on time, pay my bills on time & we have to be able to walk through the apartment!
By the time health insurance is factored in with child care, it is amazes me people manage to afford to have kids. That is before all of the other expenses. Just from hearing family and coworkers, it is impressive.
Child care needs to be affordable. That means if we want to help low income families we need to make sure they can get child care at a vastly reduced rate or free while making sure it's quality care.
That's just it low-income families do get help...my state does anyway. It's middle-income parents that are now being forced to decide between working and paying to much for daycare. Consistently, l have moms who are clients stating it was not worth going back to work because they would be working to just pay for daycare.
@@cynthiamontgomery1192 No, it's not the same. Low income parents qualify for child care assistance. The programs vary from state to state, but low income parents often don't pay for child care. Their difficulty lies in finding an opening at a child care center takes child care assistance. Once parents make above a certain amount of money, they no longer qualify for assistance. That is usually when parents need to decide if it's worth both parents working. It usually isn't.
@@lanajohnson8424 Let me just put this out there... Low-income and middle-income categories are not defined correctly in America. It misses people that should be included. For instance, a single parent with one child that can not afford housing is often not able to get child care. People with children should be able to get child care if needed. It should not be just based on the bulk of children that are brewed and the minuscule money made. Because America needs to squeeze the worker. I do agree that programs vary from state to state. And that allows the state to define low income. Which excludes people that would possibly qualify. I personally feel... If someone has children and needs help with care. We should help as a Nation. It is the next generation after all.
I started voting while in WA, and had voted for Senator Murray every single time. She was a refreshing, young, eager face when she started her political career -- a nice break from the likes of our other Senator, Slade Gorton (R) (aka Skeletor). WA's not as blue a state as people think it is! More purple, lol.
My friends and I have been stressing about how to have a child without ruing our careers and we're not even 30 yet. I think it's great to empower women and remind them that we shouldn't have to think about this alone
The Daily Show, I can't tell you how much I love Beyond the Scenes. Roy, my brother, you deserve an Emmy for these segments. I thank you. They are informative, funny, and just comforting. Thank you. Thank you. I'm an educator in food and nutrition and Im not going back into the classroom. So, I now teach food and nutrition education you Youbute. Yasmine
Thank you for putting this out there! When I was a young divorced woman you had to lie to get an apartment if you had a child. Lol! Times have changed.
Patty: I've dealt with bullies before so I have experience with that but I also learned that you don't project your personality on to people and expect them to react well with that. You got to learn to listen to people Me: something everyone in America and the world needs to do
The “mom hour” jobs are lacking and don’t pay enough. Why Does the School Day End Two Hours Before the Workday? This mismatch creates a child-care crisis between 3 and 5 p.m. that has parents scrambling for options. On the whole, conflicting school and work schedules cost the U.S. economy $55 billion in lost productivity each year, in large part due to parents (mostly women) who scale back employment and the lost productivity when parents have to take off work during school closures. “We often think about this as a problem every family faces, and it just happens over and over again in this systemic way: The mother cuts back on her hours for when school is closed,” said Catherine Brown, an education-policy researcher at the Center for American Progress. “Why do we have a wage gap? Partially it’s because of this, I believe.” Also, If you look at how caregiving responsibilities erode a woman’s career, it takes a long time. It’s about not accepting the job that’s going to push you further in your career, because it’s going to conflict with your family. It’s about taking part-time work so that you get more time at home. It’s about choosing the job that has the most flexibility. It’s about choosing the job with the shortest commute. Those are the trade-offs. And those trade-offs end up giving them less opportunity, fewer opportunities for promotions or raises. That’s why you see much bigger gender gaps for women by age 50 than you saw at age 30. These things just happen slowly over time. Even though the pandemic has come as a big crisis and we saw the labor market crater, I think the impact of the child care crisis on women’s outcomes is going to be felt over the next decade.
@@5pctLowBattery I agree 100000% it's made so hard for mothers not everybody is married nor has help that's the problem they refuse to see coupling all situations on one ticket wont work some mother have older children to help with getting the younger ones off the bus but they cant serve supper, they cant give motherly guidance etc. Mothers need help we run the economy they need to take care of us so we can be comfortable to spend
The thing we really don't talk about is that the white middle class American stay-at-home mom of the nuclear family had a Black, Latino, or Asian nanny/maid, who was paid under the table for less than minimum wage. And here we are, today, trying to work AND be the main caregiver, all under the fantasy that the middle class women who raised us were able to do it all, when they really didn't.
The Stranger knocks you, Patti, but you continually make me proud--same with our governors for WA from 90s til last year..Thanks for representing us, and I rarely get to see you speak for yourself like this--your care and tenacity are refreshing and inspiring. Thank you..(from Mason County constituency Democrat Abroad).
Your child is the most important person in your life, right? Then why trust ANYONE with him/ her? And if you have a qualified human taking care of THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON in your life, than why complain about price? after all, your baby DESERVES IT, AND YOU deserve to have peace of mind knowing that your mist valuable person is well taken care of!
@@andratoma9834, I was fortunate enough to be able to stay at home and raise my children, many of todays parents are not. Most households, both parents have to work. And what about single parent households? Have a little empathy and come up with a solution, not criticizing working parents and the outrageous cost of childcare.
I appreciate Sarah mentioning the other parents impacted. Sometimes the mom isn't the primary caregiver. I know us dad's are in the minority in this but we exist. Childcare for all children under twelve, all hours of the day would be a great benefit to our economy and to our wellbeing.
Y can't America look to other countries for ideas concerning working women and childcare issues ....many countries are doing way better than the 🇺🇸 where that is concerned and it would b beneficial to the nation in big a way
@@moravialaurich5423 So are the other countries. They just didn't have a conservative party so dedicated to the rich and corporations that they aren't willing to raise taxes to benefit regular Americans. They feel it's fine if you're spending it paying military contractors, after all, those are their donors. Any sort of corporate rebate is fine too, since that makes corporations more profitable. That's not socialism. /s But spending it on programs that benefit the average person is "socialism". They use that term as a scare tactic. It isn't, as socialism is when the government owns the means of production.
As a childfree woman, people are often baffled why I don’t have kids and sometimes feel sorry for me. Women being the primary caretaker and having their careers affected is something I’ll never have to deal with. Not that I am a career climber, it’s just less stress in an already stressful world.
Most of the time it's other women that don't understand why a woman would ever NOT want to have kids, though. I have always only heard that from women.
I work in special education with my own school aged kids and the balancing act of working and helping them with their work, feeding them, responding to teachers and not turning into a witch took a toll on me.
We finally have a fellow educator living in the White House. I'm desperately trying to be hopeful that Dr Biden is able to sway policy in support of educators and support staff with her experience.
My mom had to go back to work 2 weeks after her c section with me, even 2 weeks was too much money lost, we need paid maternity/paternity leave, we need affordable child care, and we need to stop punishing woman for either having a baby or not having one, because seemingly neither is the best option
Roy, your Beyond the Scenes show is FABULOUS! You are a masterful interviewer and do an excellent job of interviewing folks by the types of questions you ask that really draws them out as well as evoke people to talk about the issues in ways that keeps pacing lively and engaging. As a WA State resident I have always voted from Patti. Isn't she great!
This is an interesting topic and discussion. In the mid-90's I was a single parent to 3 elementary school age kids. Daycare, Summer Care were a financial and emotional nightmare. The cost of covering 11 weeks of summer was $6,500! Then get surprised with an entire week for Thanksgiving they would be off and three weeks later winter break. Your sick and vacation time taken up with random sick kid, emotional needs kid, etc. But what I really noticed was when I left the private sector in 1999 and went to work for a public university who had more resources to be supportive of parents in general. There was a bias against single parents. Married parents got all the time off they wanted and needed. It was attitude and snarky comments when a single parent had to take time. I had to cover for my director's assistant who in 8 years working took time for: wedding/honeymoon, 3 pregnancies, 2 mission tours with her church, 1 year of part time work to complete her masters in theology, not finance to benefit our department, theology. I asked to reduce my time time by 1 hour each day so I could pick up my sons from school and not pay for aftercare. I was denied.
It takes a village to raise a kid. When I was a kid, whenever my mom had an errand to do, she would just told me to run to the neighbor if I need anything. And the lady nextdoor would peek every now and then to see if i'm doing fine. Now I don't even know my next door neighbor.
I became a stay at home mom in 1985, I had just started my clinicals my parents were my childcare 4 days a week and they were moving away and I as pregnant. My husband and I discussed it and we just couldn’t afford daycare on 1 salary as i was going to be unpaid during my clinical which was 40hrs per week and I still had classes. So I dropped out of college and we agreed that when the baby I was pregnant with started pre-k I could go back and finish. Long story longer I went back to school 16 years later.
I really do like these Beyond the Scenes with Roy Jr. They are just so helpful and is calming to sit down and have a meaningful discussion. I can also greatly appreciate the scheduling and the work that goes into child-rearing. I did have a hand with my third child and being in the service so there was juggling with schedules and making sure she got to daycare and everything. But that was at least 20 years ago, and I don't have any other kids. However I agree we need to expand our maternity / paternity leave policies.
I would like to add to the comments on the Trevor Noah show that my mom and I went to work when we were of age for the workforce back then. I really love and appreciate all the time you are giving to this issue and the care to be involved there with Desi!😇 thanks again, Debbie Pierce
When she mentioned about family leave I was just thinking about that and asking how come America doesn't have that? maternity leave, paternity leave. Where I'm from we have that so that you can get some time spend with your family when you're pregnant and you have to nurse the baby so I agree with her There should be no question about having that
Because worker's rights are abysmal in the US. There's the Family Medical Leave Act, but it's garbage. It provides for job security and ultimately protects the employer over all. It's minimal, unpaid time off, and can't cause "undue burden" to the employer. And the employee must be employed for at least a year to qualify. All it protects is health insurance (for those lucky enough to have it) and the position itself (so the employer can't advertize it). That's really it. And it often just buys the employer time to figure out how to fire the worker if/when they return and make it look like something other than why they took leave. It harms women and minorities the most, like everything else. Some cities and municipalities have more progressive local laws that try to support families and disAbled workers, but there's nothing federal besides FMLA.
Wow this is an interesting piece! I think back and see how fortunate I was to live on a so called Hippie commune, where everyone helped and the kids could stay with the other parents if I had to work. I had to raise my kids at the age of six and three on my own because the Mom left for another man! That lasted for a year, until she left him and became a doctor and bought a house 300 miles away, so we came to an arraignment where I had them for six months and then she had them for six months. We both understood never bad mouth the other parent in front of the kids. It was tough that first year and I had to cry and be strong at the same time. I realize how important it was that I had friends all living on the same piece of land that gave us so much support! It’s true that it takes a village to raise kids!
We also need a workforce that doesn't rob us of all our time so that we can actually be parents. A 6 hour workday would be nice! Along with family leave
I think, as a society, we need to educate people into having manners again. We need childcare facilities and teachers but we also need people who know how to interact with people respectfully. Because you can't attract people to those type of jobs when they have to deal with extremely rude people who want to feel superior.
Sen Murray is a bright light for the women of the state along with Rep Jayapal with the positive work they have done for women in WA. It is nice to hear her talking about this issue and I hope we can instigate a system similar to what the Canadians have. Quebec developed a model that saved to government money after implemented. It has been copied around the world but not here, yet. Child care in Canada & Canada's universal child care program is a model worldwide
This is still an on going issue…an alarming number of women had to stop working again to deal with unstable school and child-care situations. The numbers are striking: 309,000 women over age 20 dropped out of the labor force in September, meaning they quit work or halted their job searches. In contrast, 182,000 men joined the labor force, Labor Department data showed. My 9-year-old woke up with sniffles and could not go to school today. I am living this in real time.
@@hustlebustle3986 it's also a societal issue, people EXPECT women to both work AND be perfect housewives at the same time. Ofc people will push the stay at home role on women more than men
@@hustlebustle3986 In terms of long-term damage, two-income households have become key to upward mobility in this country (America). So if one parent has to drop out of the labor market, or earns substantially less over a lifetime because of that, what does that look like? The Bureau of Labor Statistics estimates that *both parents work in two-thirds of families* in which married parents have children. There are major long-term financial repercussions of dropping out of the labor market, even temporarily. When you talk about upward mobility, this puts families on just a completely different trajectory that’s not about losing two or three years of income; it’s about being on a lower earnings trajectory for the rest of your life. Families are facing really difficult short-run challenges, but the long-run issue is that we still haven’t fully balanced child care and adult care responsibilities among men and women. If you’re working from home, as kids see both parents trying to work, do they go to mommy or daddy first? You know, if the kids are biased and run to mom more, that’s going to have a bigger impact on her career. Why would the kids be biased? Well, the kids are biased because of patterns of behavior in the household that mean even when spouses try to share responsibilities, inequality means that mom’s picking up more than her share. Women, for a very long time, have been doing more than their share of caregiving. And now, during the pandemic, the amount of caregiving has just gone up enormously. We need men to step up and do more work at home. If the amount of work has gotten bigger now that the kids are home, we need to balance the shares more. That way, employers will recognize that they have to cut parents slack if it’s not just the female parents, but all parents who need a bit more slack.
@@5pctLowBattery i understand a lot of your points. I believe women are involved in care more because they are more caring, emotional and loving. When it comes to caring for a child, generally mothers are forward than fathers. This does not mean there is no equality. Just shows the priority of both parents. Couples can talk about their duties easily. Its not a national issue. And its not like a person does something that society expects them to do. If one of me and my wife would require to leave work to take care of our children, I would be happy to do that but she would probably prefer her to do it. Thats because of her decision and not society's. If you cant talk and decide as a couple you two probably have some communication problem and need to fix that. Also men doing less of house works is also a couple problem. Talk about it and divide work. We do that all the time. Why does the media sound like its a government duty or something.
I remember, while in school [note I did a career switch that cost me a huge income cut, plus debt earning a new degree] to afford to be there for my child as a single parent. Meanwhile, the male relative decided he would never earn a decent wage lest he’s forced to contribute more; so 9-5, then sit at home, watch Netflix. N’way I took on a job in the summer at our local grocery store…the closest I could without a car. To work weekends, when my kid wasn’t in camp, I’d to pay a child sitter to come to my place, since I didn’t have a car to drive him to her. I ended up paying her more than I earned on weekends. It didn’t make sense working anymore, so I let it go….
The first time my brother and his wife left me alone with my nephew they came home to every pillow and padded object in the house crammed in the living room . . . I remember sticking my head out and asking for the password. His wife was not impressed, but happy her child was still alive.
This makes me want to cry…of joy and oh! Womanhood! Watching sarah literally freak out because she has to attend to the professional duty, and attending to the baby…🙆🏿♀️ Honestly, my child has always been praised as having such high self-control, being able to sit down, and entertain himself…while I worked…this is surreal
You are awesome!!! It was such a challenge for me. My spontaneous "not planned" pregnancy was an eye-opener. She was a preexisting condition...so I had to buy Cobraat $300 a month... I was paid $176.00 a week.. I didn't have family near and had just separation from th AF. I was still in the reserves. I had to give up breastfeeding to go on duty. I have too many stories. 😩
When I made the connection between the word “husband” and “animal husbandry”, I stopped using it to refer to the person I married. Now I only call him my “spouse” or “partner”.
Right now my office is still remote, and both currently and when we move back to a hybrid schedule in January (theoretically), we are FORBIDDEN from doing any care of any kind, whether child or elder or whatever, at any time while we are on the clock. This applies to both hourly and salaried employees. If we are discovered with a child on camera/making noise in the background/whatever, we lose work from home privileges and might be fired. This is also a company that offers zero (0) sick days. You use your PTO or you work while sick/while your child is sick. They will generously allow you to take your laptop and headset home while you do so, but even that is at the discretion of your manager, and again, if you're working from home, they better not catch you taking care of your sick child.
An AMAZING conversation that could only have been better if there were a Black woman or two on the panel. We add a very different and larger, more complex aspect to these issues. I am so impressed with Roy Wood Jr.'s skills and insight on issues affecting America and our people.
I have brain fatigue as the norm from the stress of my job and with the pandemic, I'm shot. I realized, wow! my job that provides the worst medical package even buying their most expensive insurance packages is making me develop long-term illbesses! And I'm writing this Oct 19, 2021. I'm very afraid for my mental state since the start of the pandemic when I already have the over the top real and future physical health status affected by work stress.
I'm so sorry. I myself have started therapy. A lot of psychiatrists are doing online sessions now. There's also the possibility you're overwhelmed because mobile apps provide too much access to outside stimulation. We all have too much to deal with without thinking about national issues, people's opinions in social media, or even local news that we can't control. When I'm overwhelmed I zoom into what is actually part of my world right now- my home, things I need to do now, and the people closest to me. I save the rest for a day when I can handle more. If something truly important happens, someone wil surelyl tell me about it. I'm also working on my nutrition, lowering inflammation and taking care of vitamin deficiencies like vitamin D. I hope that is a little bit helpful. I will get off RUclips now :)
I love how accommodating the Daily Show is when it comes to being able to tell the higher-ups "I'm expecting a child" hearing All these experiences. Makes me love the staff even more
I am so happy that Trevor and team saw potential with Desi instead of a burden. I tried going to interviews while pregnant and the first thing they mention is my pregnancy. Needless to say, I never got the job until after =( I do feel that infant-prek needs to be included just like regular public schools. Its such a vital time in a childs life. We really need to invest more into these critical years.
I am lucky in 2 respects.. 1. That I work for an AMAZING company where I could work remotely and wasn't affected financially while we are all dealing with this pandemic, and 2. My kids are 18, 14 & 13 years old so they are all old enough that I didn't have to quit my job to care for my kids, and my kids are old enough that they were able to navigate virtual school on their own for the most part, and didn't require me to watch over them 24/7.. Also, my kids are old enough to understand that just because I was at home with them, that from 8 AM - 5-6 PM they knew NOT to disturb me, unless someone was bleeding, and/or dying LBVS. IDK what I would have done, or how things would have played out for me if my kids were too young to be left "alone" and needed adult supervision 24/7. I really feel for parents that were forced to quit their jobs/careers in order to care for their little ones, or trying desperately to WFH while watching their little ones, being an employee, teacher, chef etc all day long.
When I was a high school science teacher, my pay was completely used up because of childcare and all the sick leave and missed work days due to ill children. We realized that we would have the same amount of money if I stayed home with our kids. How does this help the community if a science teacher can't afford to work AND have a family?
Someone I used to work with had this realization too. She loved her job and was excited to come back to it after having her baby but realized she was basically paying to work once childcare was taken into account. So she quit and they made due on her husband’s income.
We are in the same situation. Wife left work and we actually have a bit more money. We took that extra cash and now shes taking courses online while our child is back in school. Shes always wanted to do something more but never felt like she had the opportunity.
Right. I agree.
@@lunarthief6501 I'm so happy that you were able to turn the obstacle into an opportunity. I am so grateful that you are supporting her goals and desires with the family's finances and with your moral support. Congratulations. Thank you for sharing your story and for inspiring me.
@@thesingerintheshower Well given the options this one is easy. The government picks up part of the cost and we take the rest. Once shes done with school our income and taxes will increase so it's a win win. Plus I'm selfish this means we may be able to retire on 30 or 40 years.
I'm a SAHM right now and my husband appreciates me a lot more now that he's been working from home. He didn't realize all that I do every day until he was home. I mean he's still doesn't fully realize all that I do with all the organizational, researching, planning, scheduling, inventory, accounting and other business labor I do running a household and making sure my kids get all they need as far as their education, health and development. But at least as far as the child care and house work part, he has a much better appreciation for that than he used to.
The U.S.A. had a childcare system during WWII when women first entered the workforce en masse. When necessity dictates the economic growth, anything is possible to achieve.
Russia had pretty much the same thing under Stalin. There are pros and cons to having both parents in the work force.
Exactly 😘
@@blakethegreatone2058 And ther point of your Stalin example is?
There are pros and cons, but that should be those parents' decision. In a "free country" women should have the freedom to choose.
Senator Murray describes a childcare/parental leave system that is taken for granted in European countries. I moved to Europe when my babies were small and would talk to other mothers about maternity leave in our respective countries. They reacted with shock when I explained the American system...or lack thereof. I've experienced how basic social care creates a much stronger, more stabile society. Many right-wing Americans call this "socialism" and reject it, but it's the most pro-family way to run a society. Republicans have always called themselves the "family values" party and I can't understand why.
Thank you for saying this out loud!! Change has to happen in the labor systems.
Well not quite. Unfortunately Ireland has exactly the same problem. It's bad that a lot of people can't afford to get on the property ladder. It's even worse that childcare is scarce and costs the same as a month's wage. A lot of adults are having to live at home well into their 30s and starting families are getting later due to social welfare issues
Desi, you did the simplest thing and yet it made a world of difference to me, so much so that I just burst into tears. Thank you for the shout-out to single parents!
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In 2019 I was pregnant while I worked as a videographer/ Photographer at a major media company. I kept the entire pregnancy hidden because I knew my job would be taken away. After 7 months I had to undergo an emergency c-section and even then I told my job I was sick. After spending weeks recovering I returned to the workplace fully cleared only to have all my duties given away and was slowly faded out of the company.
We need a better work culture.
Wow, they fired you just for getting pregnant but slowly so that nobody could prove it
Oh that is despicable! I'm so sorry you had to go through that.
The slap in the face was I was given great letters of recommendation from my superiors.
ruclips.net/video/1bDD914rahc/видео.html
@Esphaeras Praestans when minorities and women needs are addressed, everyone benefits. Having more women in the workplace would change the culture especially if they are in position of power. Making sure your work is inclusive and you can be your whole self, wether it's a caretaker or another hobby on the side.
When we realized my entire paycheck went to daycare, I quit working. Now I’m done with raising the kids and ‘too old’ to enter the workforce. Really frustrating.
Mother's that stay at home 'manging' the house should get college credits and credit with employers because it is not an easy job, even if it is unpaid.
As a woman in a country full of unfaithful, cheating husbands, I kept working, even though I wasn’t making more than $50 per month after childcare. I researched and knew that taking 4-6 years off during childbearing years would make me seem out of date in my field, hard to get a job later, and impact my ability to retire when I got old. When I was 10 years old, I overheard my mom talking to herself. She was mumbling. “I know I should leave him, but how would I support my kids?” I made a promise to myself that I would ALWAYS be able to support my kids. Of course, this was in the 70s and 80s and there was childcare.
These are the best thing to come out of the daily show in years (and I still love the daily show and am a huge Trevor fan)
Hey 👋 sorry 😞 but we haven’t heard
Hey
IKR I had these problems 30yrs ago and am still angry about it. When I took my daughter to work I got Can't find a sitter?? When my ex took her to work he got Oh let me help she's so cute!
@@twilfits #thank you
@@twilfits Yes! Women took the hit during Covid-19, too. Women were expected to stay home, not the men, for the most part, when the kids were remote learning. I firmly believe that most of the reason why we make less money than men is because we birth children. Of all the things in Biden's big 3.5T plan, I think that free preschool and childcare are the two things other than money for the environment, that absolutely need to happen. If these happen parents can afford to pay off college loans and not be in debt for the rest of their lives and maybe even be able to buy a house.
I really enjoy these segments. This one hit home. In the 70s when I had my first child, I let my boss talk me into coming back early from my maternity leave. It made no difference in my career and I still regret it.
Hi Theresa 👋
This is the era where we began to berate women. Ironic, since this was the time of woman's rights.
@@bobrisse9823 It was pushback, not irony.
I was raised in the 60’s and 70’s my there were 3 of us kids and my mother who was divorced worked full time as a nurse and at night she was a graduate student. They didn’t really have things for kids after school so for a while my mom would pay someone to watch us after school. My mom was a head of her time, when we first moved to the Texas town we were raised in my mother purchased a house for us, on the mortgage paperwork she was referred to as femme sole and 2 weeks after moving in the received notice from the bank that basically we had to vacate another family wanted to buy that house and it had a man in charge of the family. My mom called the realtor who gave her the number of someone a couple blocks down who was eager to sell so she went after it and we moved in. The point to this long story was a femme sole can have the home she purchased for herself and 3 small children taken away because there was nobody saying it wasn’t okay. BTW After my husband died 7 yrs ago I moved and bought a new house for cash on the contract I noticed I am also identified as Femme Sole. I choose to believe it means I have a keen musical insight as well as wisdom beyond years.
💯🙌 When you are barely making enough at your job to cover child care then it doesn't make sense to work. If you can't get child care then you have to work opposite shifts of your spouse but anymore work shifts don't tend to be stable. Even when your children are older finding a job you can do while they are in school is nearly impossible and then what do you do in the summers? Thank you for highlighting this problem, labor shortage is NOT because people are lazy.
My wife and I are solid middle class and we could barely afford 2 kids in child care. $500 per week for 2 kids was a hard pill to swallow.
Pundits wonder why people are not having children. It's so hard nowadays.
@@jackb1969 I am a stay at home mom. My husband drives truck. Financially we can afford for me to stay home. That doesn't mean that I want to! I would love to work somewhere and get out of the house but who would watch my kids.. You are completely missing the point and definitely part of the problem. Completely ignorant statement
Yep. My sister literally put her entire paycheck into daycare. But she had been at the job so long she didn't want to leave and lose all the perks she had accumulated. If you have 2 kids daycare costs more than rent.
And you know something else that I just thought of? Mental health must also be an issue for many moms as well because they have to do this child care balancing with their work so they wouldn't get much time for themselves and so they would get overwhelmed but it also affects their mental health. This is just me thinking about this logically and showing some empathy as a man
America has a social services problem in general. It even probably brings down the men of power who continue to desperately uphold their power. Stronger families and communities only make for stronger economies and progress.
Roy is a great listener! He is on his way to become the next “Oprahman”’!!!
Love this show! Roy is awesome!!!!!
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Childcare here in Germany is free in alot of cities. For most cities it is free from 3 years on. More women in the workplace=more taxes for the government= more money for childcare!!! Problem solved and easy.
Wow a government who actually spends tax money on civilian resources 😭
As a single mom of 3 doing waitress AND bookkeeping work I spent over 1/2 of my income paying baby sitters, lost connection with kids, made at least one bad relocation decision then had to get food assistance, eventually welfare balanced legally by reporting income.
They took away all assistance at a certain level of income which was so problematic it became sensible to quit waitressing but retained bookkeeping which also supported baby sitter.
They were the toughest BUT MOST REWARDING years of my 70 years.
Thank you for this episode! Childcare is so expensive. This is why I made such a hard decision and left the workforce almost 7 years ago. Between before/after school care for the older ones and daycare for the baby at the time it made more financial sense to stay home.
I stopped to watch one of these several weeks ago, I'm addicted now. All day all the time, just keep it coming. Maybe have Trevor on as a guest and talk about how you all choose which stories get airtime and how much. 💚💚💚 Love you guys.
You can find several interviews of the whole cast/team together and individually being interviewed about these topics..fall asleep watching and at two I the morning g you'll wake up and they're playing. :)
That senator hit it dead on....
Politicians are like a group of toddlers.... constantly trying to prevent a tantrum. 💯
I'm so glad this issue is being addressed. The sacrifice falls on the women a majority of time when it comes to giving up a career or feeling bad about having to put her career on hold because she is balancing family and life.
I blame people's inability to veer away from former societal norms.
@@blakethegreatone2058 elaborate
Working full time with mandatory OT and having a young child or children is extremely hectic. Something most will never understand unless they’ve experienced it themselves.
@@auroraautumn8764 Usually it's the mother that's expected to take time off to care for a sick child or take them places. Not the father. This has an impact on her attendance and her ability to work overtime if needed. If a father is taking care of his child, it's assumed he is babysitting while the mother is doing something else, not that he is providing regular care for his child. People think he deserves a pat on the back for doing things they take for granted when the mother does them. They don't expect the father to stay home with the kids, although that does happen more often now. They don't expect him to leave work to pick up a sick kid from school.
@@auroraautumn8764 it's a societal norm still that the woman stays home while the man works. Obviously this is not true everywhere. I myself am a stay at home dad and I do all the things associated with that. I tell other men what I do and you can tell they think less of me. It's my belief that if we can change the societal norm then you would see alot of men staying home.
As a parent that works from home I felt it in my soul when Roy said that his kid can tell when something important is about to happen so he just says “snacks”.
Pay childcare workers a livable wage.
Amen 🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻
I have an autistic daughter, who it is almost impossible to find a childcare for her and the one I can find is almost impossible to afford, given the rate of children being diagnosed within the Autism Spectrum in the United States, a lot of parents are being faced with this reality in which one of the parents has to stay home. I still work but the jobs I can have access to are the ones with very low pay rate but have some flexibility. So no professional and economical growth for me.
My daughter works with children who have autism. We talk all of the time about the costs for parents. Basically if you don't have great insurance it is *very* difficult to get the therapy the kids need. My heart goes out to you!
How much is her child care?
I work for a school age childcare program and we would be better able to serve autistic children if we could have adequate staffing. If we could get more funding to childcare workers, who in my experience really want to do the job and do it well, it would make such a difference for workers and the families served. And if the workers the felt they had respectable pay and benefits there would be more people who want to do the work of raising this country's next generation.
My mom's a single parent and she was struggling to the point where she had to ask my grandmother for help raising both me and my sis. she could have easily rejected but thankfully she did it not to say that she wasn't that involved though because she kept tabs and checked in every so often to see how everything was going while she was trying to sort out her teaching career. So I sort of indirectly appreciative of that shout out.
"Winter is coming."
Childcare employment doesn't pay a living wage, especially nowadays. It's terrible that women are getting forced out of the workforce but there's a problem with the balance of affordable childcare and providing living wage for the childcare workers who enable others to go to work.
We need the wealthy to stop hoarding all the money. All of the economical issues seem to point to the same place, profits are at record highs, upper management salaries are at record highs. Everyone below the top 10% seem to be doing all the work and still struggling . . . it doesn't make sense.
I was stunned when I was 17 and realized my adult coworkers at a daycare made very little more than I did.
Lol they don't care. They are literally expecting teachers to be subjected to mask-less germ hoarders and not get a livable wage in the US every where. 🤦♀️
It's insulting when services like sitter city advertise $10hr to dress your child and out them on the bus. That's like $20 for a 3hr day...considering committing. $7 hr doesn't pay for your own car..especially part time.
We had a major chain of childcare centers, they had like 7 locations, go bankrupt ahead of the covid-19 pandemic in my county. There hasn't been anything to replace that.
Thank you for having this conversation. I just resigned my position as a NP in women's health clinic for a similar reason. I put in vacation time at the requested time in order to care for my daughter. My supervisor only approve 2 weeks, advising me to find child care for the 3rd week because it would "disrupt the clinic". I was so emotionally stressed I resigned. Because here I was submitting my request on a timely fashion and still I was denied. I resigned because I didn't know how my future would be if something unexpected happened and I couldn't come to work.
I adore Patty, vote for her (& Maria) every cycle, one of the things I admire is her tenacity. She's spent the last 20 yrs fighting for these issues & doesn't give up, she hides her time & then smacks her fellow Senators over the head with them when they think she's let it go.
Having been a grade school teacher should be a prerequisite for every member of Congress to learn how to deal with congressional bullies.
And as a definite bonus, it would probably _also_ generate more incentive for better investments in our education system.
Sadly many teachers are bullies themselves. So that probably wouldn’t work.
These beyond the scenes are absolute gold… keep them coming.
Thank you for this thoughtful piece! We need more affordable childcare now, and support for working parents overall!! Love that you featured my WA Senator, Patty Murray who's been in office since before I moved here in 1995!
Love the "pathway through my room". As a single parent of three kids, bottom line rules: I have to be at work on time, pay my bills on time & we have to be able to walk through the apartment!
By the time health insurance is factored in with child care, it is amazes me people manage to afford to have kids. That is before all of the other expenses.
Just from hearing family and coworkers, it is impressive.
I take my hat off to those that successfully manage work, kids and life in general
Child care needs to be affordable. That means if we want to help low income families we need to make sure they can get child care at a vastly reduced rate or free while making sure it's quality care.
Middle income also cannot afford it.
That's just it low-income families do get help...my state does anyway. It's middle-income parents that are now being forced to decide between working and paying to much for daycare. Consistently, l have moms who are clients stating it was not worth going back to work because they would be working to just pay for daycare.
@@mariewilliams8859 it is all the same issue. Low income and middle income. That is by design and is very intentional.
@@cynthiamontgomery1192 No, it's not the same. Low income parents qualify for child care assistance. The programs vary from state to state, but low income parents often don't pay for child care. Their difficulty lies in finding an opening at a child care center takes child care assistance. Once parents make above a certain amount of money, they no longer qualify for assistance. That is usually when parents need to decide if it's worth both parents working. It usually isn't.
@@lanajohnson8424 Let me just put this out there... Low-income and middle-income categories are not defined correctly in America. It misses people that should be included.
For instance, a single parent with one child that can not afford housing is often not able to get child care.
People with children should be able to get child care if needed. It should not be just based on the bulk of children that are brewed and the minuscule money made. Because America needs to squeeze the worker.
I do agree that programs vary from state to state. And that allows the state to define low income. Which excludes people that would possibly qualify.
I personally feel... If someone has children and needs help with care. We should help as a Nation. It is the next generation after all.
I started voting while in WA, and had voted for Senator Murray every single time. She was a refreshing, young, eager face when she started her political career -- a nice break from the likes of our other Senator, Slade Gorton (R) (aka Skeletor). WA's not as blue a state as people think it is! More purple, lol.
deciding whom to vote for based on the looks of the candidate isn't rly smart
Down here in Oregon, she was heard, too. I agree with all you say ❤
Yikes, Slade Gorton! I’d forgotten about him. Appreciate Senator Murray even more now lol
This is amazing information. Sad how we are still in this position for women and childcare but the info is great.
My friends and I have been stressing about how to have a child without ruing our careers and we're not even 30 yet. I think it's great to empower women and remind them that we shouldn't have to think about this alone
The Daily Show, I can't tell you how much I love Beyond the Scenes. Roy, my brother, you deserve an Emmy for these segments. I thank you. They are informative, funny, and just comforting. Thank you. Thank you. I'm an educator in food and nutrition and Im not going back into the classroom. So, I now teach food and nutrition education you Youbute. Yasmine
Thank you for putting this out there! When I was a young divorced woman you had to lie to get an apartment if you had a child. Lol! Times have changed.
Patty: I've dealt with bullies before so I have experience with that but I also learned that you don't project your personality on to people and expect them to react well with that. You got to learn to listen to people
Me: something everyone in America and the world needs to do
She went from teaching pre-school to dealing with senators! 🤣🤣🤣
Sometimes, the people in government act more like kids than the actual kids.
Who ever makes laws needs to make a "mom law" that provides more jobs that accept a 7am-3pm slots for mothers or make child car more available!!
The “mom hour” jobs are lacking and don’t pay enough.
Why Does the School Day End Two Hours Before the Workday?
This mismatch creates a child-care crisis between 3 and 5 p.m. that has parents scrambling for options.
On the whole, conflicting school and work schedules cost the U.S. economy $55 billion in lost productivity each year, in large part due to parents (mostly women) who scale back employment and the lost productivity when parents have to take off work during school closures.
“We often think about this as a problem every family faces, and it just happens over and over again in this systemic way: The mother cuts back on her hours for when school is closed,” said Catherine Brown, an education-policy researcher at the Center for American Progress. “Why do we have a wage gap? Partially it’s because of this, I believe.”
Also, If you look at how caregiving responsibilities erode a woman’s career, it takes a long time. It’s about not accepting the job that’s going to push you further in your career, because it’s going to conflict with your family. It’s about taking part-time work so that you get more time at home. It’s about choosing the job that has the most flexibility. It’s about choosing the job with the shortest commute. Those are the trade-offs. And those trade-offs end up giving them less opportunity, fewer opportunities for promotions or raises. That’s why you see much bigger gender gaps for women by age 50 than you saw at age 30. These things just happen slowly over time. Even though the pandemic has come as a big crisis and we saw the labor market crater, I think the impact of the child care crisis on women’s outcomes is going to be felt over the next decade.
@@5pctLowBattery I agree 100000% it's made so hard for mothers not everybody is married nor has help that's the problem they refuse to see coupling all situations on one ticket wont work some mother have older children to help with getting the younger ones off the bus but they cant serve supper, they cant give motherly guidance etc. Mothers need help we run the economy they need to take care of us so we can be comfortable to spend
The thing we really don't talk about is that the white middle class American stay-at-home mom of the nuclear family had a Black, Latino, or Asian nanny/maid, who was paid under the table for less than minimum wage. And here we are, today, trying to work AND be the main caregiver, all under the fantasy that the middle class women who raised us were able to do it all, when they really didn't.
Do you have some data for this? I'd like to read up on it.
Truth! Black and Latino women have always had to work and care for richer families while their own families were cared for by grandmas and aunties.
My dad had that!! You are absolutely right!
@@lanajohnson8424 Google is your best friend
The Stranger knocks you, Patti, but you continually make me proud--same with our governors for WA from 90s til last year..Thanks for representing us, and I rarely get to see you speak for yourself like this--your care and tenacity are refreshing and inspiring. Thank you..(from Mason County constituency Democrat Abroad).
Really great segment. Thank you!
I'm really enjoying these behind the scenes segments with Roy 💕💯
This was really great. Most young people I know are on a list for daycare. If you can afford it. The cost of daycare is outrageous in my area.
Hi there 👋
Your child is the most important person in your life, right? Then why trust ANYONE with him/ her? And if you have a qualified human taking care of THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON in your life, than why complain about price? after all, your baby DESERVES IT, AND YOU deserve to have peace of mind knowing that your mist valuable person is well taken care of!
@@andratoma9834, I was fortunate enough to be able to stay at home and raise my children, many of todays parents are not. Most households, both parents have to work. And what about single parent households? Have a little empathy and come up with a solution, not criticizing working parents and the outrageous cost of childcare.
It's not the workers making money off of this racket.
Bentleys don't pay for themselves.
Such a great conversation about child care or rather lack of care
I appreciate Sarah mentioning the other parents impacted. Sometimes the mom isn't the primary caregiver. I know us dad's are in the minority in this but we exist. Childcare for all children under twelve, all hours of the day would be a great benefit to our economy and to our wellbeing.
Y can't America look to other countries for ideas concerning working women and childcare issues ....many countries are doing way better than the 🇺🇸 where that is concerned and it would b beneficial to the nation in big a way
A lot of countries in Europe have free childcare
Because American is capitalist.
@@moravialaurich5423 So are the other countries. They just didn't have a conservative party so dedicated to the rich and corporations that they aren't willing to raise taxes to benefit regular Americans. They feel it's fine if you're spending it paying military contractors, after all, those are their donors. Any sort of corporate rebate is fine too, since that makes corporations more profitable. That's not socialism. /s But spending it on programs that benefit the average person is "socialism". They use that term as a scare tactic. It isn't, as socialism is when the government owns the means of production.
By far one of my FAVORITE segments. Thank you.
As a childfree woman, people are often baffled why I don’t have kids and sometimes feel sorry for me. Women being the primary caretaker and having their careers affected is something I’ll never have to deal with. Not that I am a career climber, it’s just less stress in an already stressful world.
Most of the time it's other women that don't understand why a woman would ever NOT want to have kids, though. I have always only heard that from women.
@@missburn I've always gotten it from men and women. They are equally baffled.
@@Fumi007 Okay ☺
Yes, same. I don't know how they do it; it's amazing.
I work in special education with my own school aged kids and the balancing act of working and helping them with their work, feeding them, responding to teachers and not turning into a witch took a toll on me.
We finally have a fellow educator living in the White House. I'm desperately trying to be hopeful that Dr Biden is able to sway policy in support of educators and support staff with her experience.
This was brilliant! Thank you for giving such a lengthy space for a broad ranging and important discussion!
My mom had to go back to work 2 weeks after her c section with me, even 2 weeks was too much money lost, we need paid maternity/paternity leave, we need affordable child care, and we need to stop punishing woman for either having a baby or not having one, because seemingly neither is the best option
Roy, your Beyond the Scenes show is FABULOUS! You are a masterful interviewer and do an excellent job of interviewing folks by the types of questions you ask that really draws them out as well as evoke people to talk about the issues in ways that keeps pacing lively and engaging. As a WA State resident I have always voted from Patti. Isn't she great!
Thank you, Roy for this unique conversation.
Senator Patty Murray is Washington State's Pride & Joy! ❤️ From Spokane!
Me too! Woohoo!
Child care was 500$ a week my wife made 600 …health insurance was 80 .. what you think we needed to do?
My oldest is 23 yrs. This conversation does seem dejavou to me. I applaud the conversation; I really hope it goes somewhere this time:)
This is an interesting topic and discussion. In the mid-90's I was a single parent to 3 elementary school age kids. Daycare, Summer Care were a financial and emotional nightmare. The cost of covering 11 weeks of summer was $6,500! Then get surprised with an entire week for Thanksgiving they would be off and three weeks later winter break. Your sick and vacation time taken up with random sick kid, emotional needs kid, etc. But what I really noticed was when I left the private sector in 1999 and went to work for a public university who had more resources to be supportive of parents in general. There was a bias against single parents. Married parents got all the time off they wanted and needed. It was attitude and snarky comments when a single parent had to take time. I had to cover for my director's assistant who in 8 years working took time for: wedding/honeymoon, 3 pregnancies, 2 mission tours with her church, 1 year of part time work to complete her masters in theology, not finance to benefit our department, theology. I asked to reduce my time time by 1 hour each day so I could pick up my sons from school and not pay for aftercare. I was denied.
Roy, just gotta say. I love your segments and approaches to sensitive topics. Thanks to you (and those produce/direct/write/etc) this podcast.
Thanks Roy Wood, Jr., Sarah Hamblic, Desi Lydic, Sen Patty Murray Et Al.🙂
It takes a village to raise a kid. When I was a kid, whenever my mom had an errand to do, she would just told me to run to the neighbor if I need anything. And the lady nextdoor would peek every now and then to see if i'm doing fine. Now I don't even know my next door neighbor.
Is it weird I like these more than the actual show? No offense to Trevor, I love his work, but I like these better
Props the Daily Show and all its guests and Roy for his sensitivity to various questions. Thanks to Desi for the single parent shout out. 🤯
I became a stay at home mom in 1985, I had just started my clinicals my parents were my childcare 4 days a week and they were moving away and I as pregnant. My husband and I discussed it and we just couldn’t afford daycare on 1 salary as i was going to be unpaid during my clinical which was 40hrs per week and I still had classes. So I dropped out of college and we agreed that when the baby I was pregnant with started pre-k I could go back and finish. Long story longer I went back to school 16 years later.
When I had my kid, I worked with my kid in tow for the first few years and then overnights 8 years while being a mom on the day…it’s ridiculous.
I love this so much. As a working mom (who works from home), this hits home. 😁
I really do like these Beyond the Scenes with Roy Jr. They are just so helpful and is calming to sit down and have a meaningful discussion.
I can also greatly appreciate the scheduling and the work that goes into child-rearing.
I did have a hand with my third child and being in the service so there was juggling with schedules and making sure she got to daycare and everything. But that was at least 20 years ago, and I don't have any other kids.
However I agree we need to expand our maternity / paternity leave policies.
I would like to add to the comments on the Trevor Noah show that my mom and I went to work when we were of age for the workforce back then. I really love and appreciate all the time you are giving to this issue and the care to be involved there with Desi!😇 thanks again, Debbie Pierce
When she mentioned about family leave I was just thinking about that and asking how come America doesn't have that? maternity leave, paternity leave. Where I'm from we have that so that you can get some time spend with your family when you're pregnant and you have to nurse the baby so I agree with her There should be no question about having that
Because worker's rights are abysmal in the US. There's the Family Medical Leave Act, but it's garbage. It provides for job security and ultimately protects the employer over all. It's minimal, unpaid time off, and can't cause "undue burden" to the employer. And the employee must be employed for at least a year to qualify. All it protects is health insurance (for those lucky enough to have it) and the position itself (so the employer can't advertize it). That's really it. And it often just buys the employer time to figure out how to fire the worker if/when they return and make it look like something other than why they took leave.
It harms women and minorities the most, like everything else. Some cities and municipalities have more progressive local laws that try to support families and disAbled workers, but there's nothing federal besides FMLA.
This series is the best. Thank you, Roy, et al ❤
This is such an important conversation!!
Wow this is an interesting piece! I think back and see how fortunate I was to live on a so called Hippie commune, where everyone helped and the kids could stay with the other parents if I had to work. I had to raise my kids at the age of six and three on my own because the Mom left for another man! That lasted for a year, until she left him and became a doctor and bought a house 300 miles away, so we came to an arraignment where I had them for six months and then she had them for six months. We both understood never bad mouth the other parent in front of the kids. It was tough that first year and I had to cry and be strong at the same time. I realize how important it was that I had friends all living on the same piece of land that gave us so much support! It’s true that it takes a village to raise kids!
We also need a workforce that doesn't rob us of all our time so that we can actually be parents. A 6 hour workday would be nice! Along with family leave
Roy with the self awareness,.... amen Great video!
This is why I quit my career and now work overnights for minimum wage while my husband works during the day.
I think, as a society, we need to educate people into having manners again. We need childcare facilities and teachers but we also need people who know how to interact with people respectfully. Because you can't attract people to those type of jobs when they have to deal with extremely rude people who want to feel superior.
Sen Murray is a bright light for the women of the state along with Rep Jayapal with the positive work they have done for women in WA. It is nice to hear her talking about this issue and I hope we can instigate a system similar to what the Canadians have. Quebec developed a model that saved to government money after implemented. It has been copied around the world but not here, yet. Child care in Canada & Canada's universal child care program is a model worldwide
Thank you for this.
This is still an on going issue…an alarming number of women had to stop working again to deal with unstable school and child-care situations.
The numbers are striking: 309,000 women over age 20 dropped out of the labor force in September, meaning they quit work or halted their job searches. In contrast, 182,000 men joined the labor force, Labor Department data showed.
My 9-year-old woke up with sniffles and could not go to school today. I am living this in real time.
Is this a gender issue or couple issue? I believe couple should decide who stays home and who works.
@@hustlebustle3986 it's also a societal issue, people EXPECT women to both work AND be perfect housewives at the same time. Ofc people will push the stay at home role on women more than men
@@hustlebustle3986 In terms of long-term damage, two-income households have become key to upward mobility in this country (America). So if one parent has to drop out of the labor market, or earns substantially less over a lifetime because of that, what does that look like?
The Bureau of Labor Statistics estimates that *both parents work in two-thirds of families* in which married parents have children. There are major long-term financial repercussions of dropping out of the labor market, even temporarily.
When you talk about upward mobility, this puts families on just a completely different trajectory that’s not about losing two or three years of income; it’s about being on a lower earnings trajectory for the rest of your life.
Families are facing really difficult short-run challenges, but the long-run issue is that we still haven’t fully balanced child care and adult care responsibilities among men and women. If you’re working from home, as kids see both parents trying to work, do they go to mommy or daddy first? You know, if the kids are biased and run to mom more, that’s going to have a bigger impact on her career. Why would the kids be biased? Well, the kids are biased because of patterns of behavior in the household that mean even when spouses try to share responsibilities, inequality means that mom’s picking up more than her share. Women, for a very long time, have been doing more than their share of caregiving. And now, during the pandemic, the amount of caregiving has just gone up enormously.
We need men to step up and do more work at home. If the amount of work has gotten bigger now that the kids are home, we need to balance the shares more. That way, employers will recognize that they have to cut parents slack if it’s not just the female parents, but all parents who need a bit more slack.
@@User-LS-n5m Definitely societal as well, but don't you think that most women actually *do* want to stay home with their kids - if they had a choice?
@@5pctLowBattery i understand a lot of your points.
I believe women are involved in care more because they are more caring, emotional and loving. When it comes to caring for a child, generally mothers are forward than fathers. This does not mean there is no equality. Just shows the priority of both parents.
Couples can talk about their duties easily. Its not a national issue. And its not like a person does something that society expects them to do. If one of me and my wife would require to leave work to take care of our children, I would be happy to do that but she would probably prefer her to do it. Thats because of her decision and not society's.
If you cant talk and decide as a couple you two probably have some communication problem and need to fix that.
Also men doing less of house works is also a couple problem. Talk about it and divide work. We do that all the time. Why does the media sound like its a government duty or something.
I remember, while in school [note I did a career switch that cost me a huge income cut, plus debt earning a new degree] to afford to be there for my child as a single parent. Meanwhile, the male relative decided he would never earn a decent wage lest he’s forced to contribute more; so 9-5, then sit at home, watch Netflix.
N’way I took on a job in the summer at our local grocery store…the closest I could without a car. To work weekends, when my kid wasn’t in camp, I’d to pay a child sitter to come to my place, since I didn’t have a car to drive him to her. I ended up paying her more than I earned on weekends. It didn’t make sense working anymore, so I let it go….
The first time my brother and his wife left me alone with my nephew they came home to every pillow and padded object in the house crammed in the living room . . . I remember sticking my head out and asking for the password. His wife was not impressed, but happy her child was still alive.
Thanks for this. Roy way to man up.
This makes me want to cry…of joy and oh! Womanhood! Watching sarah literally freak out because she has to attend to the professional duty, and attending to the baby…🙆🏿♀️ Honestly, my child has always been praised as having such high self-control, being able to sit down, and entertain himself…while I worked…this is surreal
Proud of my senator, Patty Murray. She’s awesome
You are awesome!!! It was such a challenge for me. My spontaneous "not planned" pregnancy was an eye-opener. She was a preexisting condition...so I had to buy Cobraat $300 a month... I was paid $176.00 a week.. I didn't have family near and had just separation from th AF. I was still in the reserves. I had to give up breastfeeding to go on duty. I have too many stories. 😩
Love this segment! Thanks for sharing!!
When I made the connection between the word “husband” and “animal husbandry”, I stopped using it to refer to the person I married. Now I only call him my “spouse” or “partner”.
LOVED this!!!
Love the communication 🌸🙏🏼💞 Thanks for doing this
This was a great show! Thank you so much.
❤️ Pat Murray.
Right now my office is still remote, and both currently and when we move back to a hybrid schedule in January (theoretically), we are FORBIDDEN from doing any care of any kind, whether child or elder or whatever, at any time while we are on the clock. This applies to both hourly and salaried employees. If we are discovered with a child on camera/making noise in the background/whatever, we lose work from home privileges and might be fired. This is also a company that offers zero (0) sick days. You use your PTO or you work while sick/while your child is sick. They will generously allow you to take your laptop and headset home while you do so, but even that is at the discretion of your manager, and again, if you're working from home, they better not catch you taking care of your sick child.
An AMAZING conversation that could only have been better if there were a Black woman or two on the panel. We add a very different and larger, more complex aspect to these issues. I am so impressed with Roy Wood Jr.'s skills and insight on issues affecting America and our people.
Thank you for doing this. I’ve felt this all covid 😢. I couldn’t work. I’ve given up a lot for my kids to be safe
I have brain fatigue as the norm from the stress of my job and with the pandemic, I'm shot. I realized, wow! my job that provides the worst medical package even buying their most expensive insurance packages is making me develop long-term illbesses! And I'm writing this Oct 19, 2021. I'm very afraid for my mental state since the start of the pandemic when I already have the over the top real and future physical health status affected by work stress.
I'm so sorry. I myself have started therapy. A lot of psychiatrists are doing online sessions now. There's also the possibility you're overwhelmed because mobile apps provide too much access to outside stimulation. We all have too much to deal with without thinking about national issues, people's opinions in social media, or even local news that we can't control. When I'm overwhelmed I zoom into what is actually part of my world right now- my home, things I need to do now, and the people closest to me. I save the rest for a day when I can handle more. If something truly important happens, someone wil surelyl tell me about it. I'm also working on my nutrition, lowering inflammation and taking care of vitamin deficiencies like vitamin D. I hope that is a little bit helpful.
I will get off RUclips now :)
I love how accommodating the Daily Show is when it comes to being able to tell the higher-ups "I'm expecting a child" hearing All these experiences. Makes me love the staff even more
I am so happy that Trevor and team saw potential with Desi instead of a burden. I tried going to interviews while pregnant and the first thing they mention is my pregnancy. Needless to say, I never got the job until after =( I do feel that infant-prek needs to be included just like regular public schools. Its such a vital time in a childs life. We really need to invest more into these critical years.
Love these deep dives!
I am lucky in 2 respects..
1. That I work for an AMAZING company where I could work remotely and wasn't affected financially while we are all dealing with this pandemic, and
2. My kids are 18, 14 & 13 years old so they are all old enough that I didn't have to quit my job to care for my kids, and my kids are old enough that they were able to navigate virtual school on their own for the most part, and didn't require me to watch over them 24/7..
Also, my kids are old enough to understand that just because I was at home with them, that from 8 AM - 5-6 PM they knew NOT to disturb me, unless someone was bleeding, and/or dying LBVS.
IDK what I would have done, or how things would have played out for me if my kids were too young to be left "alone" and needed adult supervision 24/7.
I really feel for parents that were forced to quit their jobs/careers in order to care for their little ones, or trying desperately to WFH while watching their little ones, being an employee, teacher, chef etc all day long.
This is an absolutely brilliant and very needed piece! Thank you so much!